11
ft The
limine jVjag'a z i rp f)a
f
THE, DEXfi JUNIOR RIRTTtDAY COOK.
i2L
Told by the, Troubled Tourist
This is (he Day We Celebrate
THE BEE: OMAHA. TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 3. 1911.
f e
No. I will not take pertlon of broiled
bluef.sh. I'll take ha:f portion of ham
is1 eggs, for I've had ail the flJh I
want for a yar." declared the Trouble'!
Tourist ruefully.
"I thought my touring to ana around
your fair city would not be complete until
I had gone out to jet some real deep
awning. Or. rather. I we led into going
out for some dr sea fishing. Some good
frlor.ds of mine persuaded me It was the
only thing to do. and In a weak moment
I yielded.
"In order to thoroughly prepare for th
trip I went downtown and bought a com
plete 1'iit of oilskins and seventeen dif
ferent kind of tackle that I couldn't pos
sibly have any u.e for. Tou see. I had
only been creek fisherman back home,
nd I hadn t tried at this deep sea game.
"Thsy got me up at 4 o'clock in the
morning and started me out without any
breakfast. When we got to the boat they
had picked out they found she didn't go
out till 7. go we starved till tha eook got
his r.re going In the gailey, and fried
some market fish.
"Then we fixed up our lines, whteh had
something lass than a pound and a half
of lead on apiece, and X demanded a polo,
but they wouldn't let me bar it. They
said nobody used poles while dees sea
fishing. That was ail right, but when I
picked out a quiet spot by tha boat's rail
later on I wished poles wars fashionable,
for every hook within a mil of ma eaught
In my coat and one amateur fisherman,
who stood on the dock above ma, simply
could not miss my head with hie sinker
Every time ha dropped that pound and a
half chunk of lead my bald head was
under It. He apologised, but that didn't
keep my head from looking like a warty
golf ball before tha day was over,
"It seemed to ma that very time X gat
a bit they deolded to. move the beat, and
when I did eatch a fish, after waiting about
four hour, they said It was no good, that
It was a bergall. I waa rather proud ef
that fish, but a everybody also seemed to
be so sympathetic about It I threw ie
thing back again. Whan Z heard tha man
who had been thumping me In the head
' A QCIET SPOT."
with his sinker say ho had a fluke I
secretly rejoiced, for, according to my beat
understanding, a "fluke" meant a f.at
failure, but when ha brought up a whop
ping big. broad backed fish that had Its
face all pushed to oca aide, everybody
cheered and I discovered that In spite of
Its depressing appearance It waa a regu
lar fish.
"I caught a few sea robins, too, and
was preparing to be properly Jubilant
when I was told they weren t worth boat
room. However, they could squawk, and
that seemed a good deal more Interesting
to mo than a lopsided fluke that came up
:ike a log. Finally, seven fishermen lo
cated a claim Just above any head, and
when tha man with tha sinker wasn't
thumping ma they were throwing their
hooka Into my elothea. Then It got rough
and I quit -because I cant fish good whan
It s rough, anyway. Never could oa tha
creek baek horn.
"Whan wa got back they wanted to
know If I wanted to go age.a. but I voted
no unanimously, aad said It a heap
rather hunt eata In tha baek yard. It's a
much mora dignified sport and has greater
returns."
(Copyrighted, lill. by the X. T. Herald Co.)
PES
ornsavT. wurtw mm i
taacajeu iea.eie-f
Men Who Helped to Make America
Whan Da Witt Clinton's foresight and
enterprise resulted in the building of the
Erie canal, be helped to build up American
commerce by connecting the Oreat Lakes
with the ocean by way of Buffalo. Albany
aad New Tork.
"It waa a piece of statesmanship." aaid
Herbert Quick, "that waxes greater and
greater as wa contemplate It In the light of
lta accomplished results." .
D Witt Clinton was born at Little Brit
ain, N. T.. March t, 1760. Owing to an
accident which shattered his leg, ha was
aa Invalid during his final years and died
rather suddenly February U. IMS.
He waa aduoated first by a Presbyterian
clergyman in hie native village, afterward
at Kingston aoadsmy and at Columbia col
lege, where ha was tha first matriculated
student after the rehabilitation of what
was King" a college before the revolution.
He studied law with Samuel Jones and
then became secretary to his uncle, George
Clinton, governor of the state. Do Witt
himself waa twice governor of New Tork.
from 1817 until 1S2J, and again from 1S24 to
1427.
ttt CT THCAALT
M MAN OClT,
Po Y0 think rruil
WORK, PHtdtf
n-K-H-H1 .Sure
it'u won r uClE
TOLD MC THAT
put 5lT o- rTmi,
tail roiCA kitxji it
TNOtS pUSHe mm
NTS' LL TRY IT ON UlM
-T : m va miAH PfJcWA .1 J-
,9UtAt,rWrt.iTI 4 1-w
n
31
f l$ AM WAM 7
mAimimt'S M J
LS rjtkwVffars
to Ttm 4 pcER
Ami ever HAHPIt
Kfl I M
rou imn 'VrS. C
ON S'S "Ufm- J ! K .
13
.TUESDAY.
Xam and Addraa.
Wlnflld AUama, 1105 North Eighteenth St..
EHa L. Andrews., 354 North Twenty-aaventh
Jesse Asnnssen, SS15 North Eighteenth 8t. .
Herman Baker, 104 fouth Twenty-third St..
Bptember 5, 1911.
Yer.
. 1900
SchooL
Holy family
Rt Lothrop l?9i
.1901
.1S5
. 1904
194
.1902
.lOS
Saratoga ........
Mason
Walnut Hill
.Ho'ward Kennedy
. Tranklin
. Bancroft
00 F
KkS.W HE PTT SAY 1
lEiTneR, aa'TWaTs
S L ysu' gwwwliT
PEPPER)
jUrllne Bowler, J709 North Twenty-eighth Ae.
'Clyde Butcher. 1113 Franklin St
John Calto. 2788 Sooth Ninth St
jGoldle Connelly, 3916 North Twentieth St Lothrop 1905
jMargerie Caer, 634 South Twenty-sixth St Tamam 1S9S
i Simon Cohn. 255 North Twenty-flifta Ave .....Kellom 1905
I Albert (.'olerran. 102 Clark St Lake 1905
Evelyn Cohn. 830 South Twenty-first St. Ma6on 1900
i Willie Colbura. 1801 Miami St Lake 190 J
Wilms, Detamore. 2018 Charles St Kellom 194
,Tlna Dlstefano, 413 North Twelfth St Cass 1901
! William Edmonds, 1711 Hickory St Comenlut K97
I Joseph Feller, 2508 Franklin St Long 1S99
jEsther Gardner. 3718 Caldwell St High IS93
Clara Good, 284S Capitol Ave High 195
I Ethel C. Gorey. 2121 Seward St Kellom 18
Ben GTeenberg, 2015 Paul St Kellom 190S
Sarah Griffln, 508 South Thirteenth St Leavenworth 1900
I Ellen Orobeck. 3804 Valley St Windsor 1900
IHattie Hansen, 3S63 South Seventeenth St Vinton 1895
Roele Herring. 1954 South Twelfta 6t Lincoln 1901
Robert Hanousck, 1832 South Thirteenth St Lincoln 1902
Rudolph Hanousck, 1832 South Thirteenth St Lincoln 1903
Viola Harms, 4149 Lake St Clifton Hill 1905
John Hume. 2901 Pratt St Howard Kennedy . .1 898
.1894
.1900
.1899
.1898
.1904
.189 4
.1904
rE Witt Clinton
He waa a man of wide and varied In
terests, a patron of the fine arts and presi
dent of the New Tork1 academy. He waa
strikingly handsome in appearance and one
of the great leaders of his time.
(Copyright 1SU. by the N. T. Herald Co.)
Why Bachelors Are
'The chap who conceived the question
mark aa a symbol of woman surely knew
what he was about." declared the man-of-af
fairs. ' I took in one of the ball games
this afternoon, and when I tell you I mlased
evey play explaining the difference be
tween a foul and a home run. or a pitcher
and aa outfielder, you'll understand my
present stage of mental and physical ex
haustion. Never again! '."
These last exclamation points brought
such unholy chucklings of great glee from
the Chronic Bachelor as called tor some
sort of an explanation, which waa Im
mediately forthcoming.
"Let me warn you at the beginning, the
Question Girl Is tha real original clinging
vine to your willing, sturdy oak. and whan
she asks you sojae question that a (-year-
SEHSBSS
The Bich Man
J
As he goee up sod down the land
Jay brings lta glory to his hand.
And fliis his heart with sun and song
To cheer him as be drms aloner.
Above his bud the skiae are Oiua,
And mornings flowers are pearled wltA
dew;
And when the sunlit splendor dies
Nlaht fills with stars for his glad eyes.
As he imi laughing down the way
Hope Joint him in his mirthful play
And lurea him where the winds make
sweet
A clover pathway for his feet.
The earth heaps roses on her breast
That he may have a place to rest
And listen to the waking spring
Make eonga for his remembering.
He keepe an open hand to clasp ,
His feilow s In a comrade g:ap.
A word of kindimeua and cheer
To rover up a brother a fear.
He looks about that he may share
The human joy. the -human care.
His love has room tor many a guest
And caile to men "Come In and rest."
Thus rich In love and Joy untold
What need he care for wealth of gild 7
For thieves may steal and banks may bust.
Aad golden piles will turn to dust,
Fut love pued up within the heart
l ades not and never will depart
And all the jov you give away
Cornea back at nlgnt to crown tha day.
Larry Hodgtoa in ft. Paul Cue patch.
old school girl would scorn you wonder at
such sweet Innocence In the midst ef a cold,
cruel world. That Is. Just at first you do.
Teen oh. what a fall when you finally do
tumble!
h'ever shall 1 forget the sweet Insouciance
ef Hilda during one wonder month of ab
ject devotion. She took ail the Joy out of a
humorous situation by having to have it
explained to her two or three times before
she ssw the point.
"I took her to a tennis tournament and
made all the spectators tor yards about
hate us by explaining the game and plays
so that they couldn't hear the score called.
The day waa a complete failure for me.
"When I waa com palled to break aa en
gagement with Hilda because of Important
business duties, she could not understand
and waa angry for a week at what she
tcrxed my neslect.
A girl In her set accepted a clean,
tsa.thy American chap In preference to a
"'.seeded. Count do Somebody or other, in
tttis Cgautf t?r the purpose of discovering
bank aaseuata la seven figures with alily
girl attachment. Hilda, oouidn't under
stand how she oouid simply throw away
suet) a 'preepest.'
"Ttcedloes to say, I found It conveniently
accessary U be occupied with my business
mod ef the tlma, and Hilda, who liked to
hear things aaplalned, found another man
is answer hr sternal question.
'This summer I ran up to the mountains
for a two "celts' reoess. and whom do you
think I ran across? Hilda! And shs was
learning to play tarda. Fine for aome poor
devil who's dclng the teaching. I thought
it all ths long line of victims who had
filled la the years between, and I felt so
rested I came back to work the next day.
'After the Girl Who Couldn't Under
stand.' ten hours In the office la mere
chilj'a piay. I reckon Hilda will ga on
trumping acea to the end of her life, but
she won't trump my ace, thank fortune."
J Lor etta's Looking Glass-Held Up to Girl With Overshot Ambition J
JuanletInBee. 2789 Fort St High
iBryce Jamison, 3710 North Seventeenth St Lothrop . ...
JHarold Knee, 2222 Vinton St Vinton
Franceg E. Latham, 8T08 North Twenty-fourth St. . .Saratoga . . .
Marguerite L. Latttmer, 4332 Charlea St Walnut Hill
Bertha Lund High
Henrv Lulna. 1922 North Twenty-fifth St Long
Harry Lutwin. 2053 North Nineteenth St Lake ..190S
Edna McCrary. 22 21 North Twentieth St Lake 1903
Nellie Meline. 1721 South Fourteenth St Comenlua 1S98
I Gordon Mills. 1505 South Twenty-sixth. St High 1
j George C. Mittaner. 110 South Twenty-first St Mason 1900
iLeslie Mitchell. 2518 Davenport St Saratoga 1S99
Edward Moss, 3811 Castellar St Windsor ...
!r. r,.h.ir lift"? Vorth Twentieth St Cass ..1S97
Harry E. Newman. 1413 North Thirty-fifth St Franklin 1901
TVilber Ochsenbein. 2412 Wirt 8t Lothrop 1903
Elizabeth OKeefe. 3825 Davenport St.... Saunders 1904
Anna Olsen. 4223 Douglas St 8aundert 1903
Earl Otto. 4719 North Fortieth A Central Park 1S98
:..t T7 n.iUn tnos Lindane Ave Howard Kennedy.. tsu
iReginia Pawol, 1730 South Twenty-fourth St Im. Conception ..
'Alfred H. Petersen. 8023 Burdette St Howard Kennedy.
:ciara Petersen, 2531 South Ninth St High
!t.i r-Aiiiav sns North Elrhteenth St.. Cass
In... rh.im 2A2S Charles St Kellom 1901
! Alice V. Porterfleld. 1337 South Thirty-fourth St Park
Marr Rltio, 1318 South Twalfth St St. Philomena
Meyer Robinson. 1848 North Sixteenth St..
Tillie Seglin. 1120 North Twentieth St
(Victor H. Selleck, 8180 Meredith St
! Dorothy Shlmer. 116 South Forty-second St.
i Maggie O. Smith, 2911 Lake St
Florence K. Spellman, 2230 Ohio St
't.t-1. c.t., ions Smith Thirty-third St. . . .
i . . - t-wi ., mrh fits Lake 1898
1UUC1 b BlBfv-
v-.twin. C. Tewey. 1056 South Twentieth St.
John Vanecek, 1516 South First St Train
. x-.- uoon ?A2 Rnrt St Webst
v. - ... - u T EBt
niKU
.1904
.1896
.1895
.1899
.1901
.1896
.1904
.Kellom 1896
...Kellom 1905
.. .Monmouth Park ..1905
...High 1&98
Howard Kennedy. .18 97
...Lake 1905
...Park 1896
.Mason 1903
.1895
.Webster 1904
r
v.
'Not to Return"
J
Kot to return there Is no passage back:
Only In dreams we take the homeward
way.
Our feet ran never more retrace the track
Of yesterday
There Is no journeying backward to the
shore
From which we started In the dawning
light:
The aradilng fields shall welcome us no more
By day or night ,
Cat other coasts our landfall. ' Where the
daj-k
Obscures the waterside with vaporous
gray.
Perplexed and waeuied we shall disembark
At dose of day.
O lore. If we went backward hand in hand
Ail would Beam strange and alien. We
must learn
TVaa we have trailed hither from a land
Of no return.
As prAud of it as some ether girl Is of her
undershot bulldog, you thrust It forward
aa If it were a prise winner your overshot
ambition. I mean.
But It la not. In llfs's big bench show
It does not win the prize. Those prizes, the
ones that life la dispensing, are mostly ac
quired In the Inconspicuous corners and on
the shadow-shrouded benches where moon
vines offer their white hearts for the In
spection of the celestial goddess, keeping
her from peering with too Illuminating
beams at the man and the girl on the
bench seat.
Tou get so used to waving yourself and
your overshot ambition before the eyes of
men that you think you are getting real
satisfaction out of it. Tou are like a small
boy with a flag. He flaunts it ail through
a glorious Fourth. It la pure lay to him to
dig the staff Into the pit of his young
stomach and feel the stick punch and poke
aa the wind catches the streaming stripes
and spreads the starrv field over his
ecstatic eyes. He revels In It. Tou love the
opposition that your serene ability stirs.
It's like the punch of the flagstick. Tou
fix your eyes upon the future with its
gleaming stars of promise. Tou scorn to
feel the Jabs and stabs of the skeptic as
pain. Tou dlaregard them. Tou are ob
sessed with your dream. Tou are vanity
mad with the infatuation for yourself aa
you see your grub present burst Into your
butterfly future.
It is all in your mind, a dream, aa over
shot ambition. And a day dawns when It
proves poor oompeaiy. The small boy waves
his flag the day after the Fourth, but there
ia no martial music In tha air. He waves It
the next day: and he notices that the uni
forms that had flashed along tha street are j
no longer In evidence. He waves It the i
third day. and a rainstorm spatters the 1
gay banner
have thought yourself so smart that you'
have again and again wounded the self-love
of others. Tour flag-waving day passes.
Tour overshot ambition dees not justify It
self in words. And you have not won a
prize.
Men crave what they have not. They
want tenderness, sweetness, a willingness
to be satisfied with the admiration of an
Individual instead of the acclaim of the
mob. Tou have flourished your overshot
ambition till you have convinced the man
who waa attracted to you that you never
could be contented with him and his un
ostentatious offerings. He never leads you
to the perch seat screened by the sheltering
moon-vines.
He aska one of those quiet, little girls
whom you think Insignlflcsnt because they
are not showy. And you sit holding your
empty hands ana! wonder "why clever men
merry such fools.'
And the snewer is that eiever women are
such abnormally short-sighted creatures
that thv fdrget to remember that a man
trusts the testimony of his eyes and ears.
He sees how they act aa if a mere man
and bablea and hemekeeping would bore
them to death. Is your overshot ambition
that disappoints you even If you succeed in
realizing it worth giving up so much to
keep?
I have never yet seen a woman who has
accomplished much without marriage but
that I have had the feeling that aha could
have done more with It. It may be stren
uous treatment: but It teaches a lot. And
overshot ambitions close the door to that
knowledge too bitterly often. Beware of
yours.
Lida Wherry. 2911 Spencer St.
j Herbert Wright. 2235 Charlea St
Floy Targes, 3533 Sherman Ave
Fannie Zlegman, 1123 NortB Tweniiem ot.
s
What is Fear-and Why?
All military men know about the "1
o'clock In the morning courage.". This
means that if a soldier is courageous at that
hour, when all the vital physical forces sre
at their lowest ebb. such a soldier is Indeed
aa unusual man. Napoleon surely sensed
this fact, with his wonderful military In
tuition, when be declared that an army
fights on Its stomach: that Is, men well
fed have courage, while those who are
starved are easily trlgntened. guch Is the
rule, though history affords many a glor
ious example to the contrary, as among
Washington a soldiers at Valley Forge.
"M. Alfred Mezieres of the Frenca
academy writing In the Paris Revue, con-
He waves it yet another day, 1 sldere that fear Is caused.-by some unex-
and some one laughs at him and tells him
tha Fourth has rassed.
Do you see the point, girl with the over
shoe ambition? Tour youth excuses your
conceit and gams Indulgence for your
dreams. But it passes. Meanwhile you
pected danger and such certainly is often
times the rase. The Inexplicable is likely
to Inspire fear: but Immediately the Inez- Butter the size of an egg usually means
plicab.e is confronted and analyzed it gen- one ounce
eraily loses its terrors". When Mezieres was j Four tablespoonfuls of a liquid consti
under fire be was not afraid, because I tute a wineglassfuL
knew that I was going to be fired gt.' On
the other hand, he was dreadfully fright
ened when, while riding on an Arab steed
in a forest, he suddenly found himself ia
front of aa express train which bad been
hidden by trees.
"Fear, after ail, is the Individual's re
action in the presence of an untoward and
antipathetic environment: Its essence Is of
self-preservation: It is. in the last analysis,
a protection against destruction or death.
It Is by no meana always a ridiculous
malady; nor is Its manifestation always
puerile."
The ptthiest observation which Mazarde
contributes to the discussion is that ef
Marshal Nay the bravest ef the brave: 'A
coward Is he who boasts that he never
was afraid.' "
.Kellom 1904
.High 1893
.Kellom 1901
5.3
r
Silhouettes of the Sidewalk
Drat that boy:" his mother criea.
"What a sleepy head:
Twice I've called, and still he lies.
Fast asleep In bed!
Things were not like that last
If I called up to him
He was up ere I could speak.
Beady for a swim:
"Tea. but school begins today!
Things are changed a bit.
He would rather run and play
Than go to school and sit
Before a sum that dees not mean
The same amount both ways.
Or learn the difference between
Inlets, sees and bays.
"Jlmmle did you brush your teeth
Tou v no time to lose:
Is your neck clean underneath?
Have you shlr.ed your shoes?
Here: Just let me see your ears'
Wash them once again:
I 1 'iil
It Was Ever Thus
YOwftSfci-F AMiUlMfcft?
why vu coocum't trim a
CALICO SUM BQWNtT.
YOUMQ WOMAN, YOU
kTOULDM'T CRAW
re LADLE FOR
A. a.
v.rTn vr
CONDENSED miOJp
SnCKT rVSMO? huh". Mf Crtlld
TOU WEKC ric VCK. tut J I
PO wWiK! CrO MOrta AnO
WASH THft OISHE&I
aeBBaaaws.swjew.er- - fl aw '.'"aV I
6t r
. i i i
BOOKINQ
AQEM'CY
kY. SEvvTl
Scant Dft
fcCArVT -CO
KANYTHiNq:
OH WtLL?
HEADLINE
SUSJE SPLASH
ftSOAOwAY'S
LATEST .,
scNSATion.!
, OH Mr
AiV 1 V-V t 1
Oet your stormcost: Father fars
That It's going to rain.
' Breakfast has been waiting hours,
nd your coffee's cold'
Give yoiir teacher these nice rowers
Take thetn. or 1 11 scold'
Here s your pencils' Here a your books:
For luncheon, here's a dime'
Mind, no frowns nor surly looks'
Quick! Ee off on time"'
Mother sighs tn full relief
When he shuts the door.
He'll reach school, 'us her belief.
Ia five minutes more
Fifteen minutes after that
He gives her quite a fright.
"What! Not gone? Good gracious:
Ltave that awful kite'"
(Copyright, 1911. by the y. T Herald Co )
Scat!
Tlnales aad Measerlac.
In boiling chicken, fifteen minutes should
be allowed to the pound. Broiled chicken
requires fifteen to twenty minutes.
Twenty minutes la required to boil ;ro; -erly
spaghetti or macaroni.
good average time to allow for baking
a. loaf cake ia an hour to an hour and a
half, according te ase.
Louis Giob-emocrat.
