THE BEE: OMAHA, FRIDAY. AtWST 25. 1911.
The gee':pnvp Va
p)a
az,ine
THE, DEE,5 c5UN10R BIRTHDAY ROOK
Bleat of the Innocent Bystander
j
This is (he Day We Celebrate
1
ge
r n
'"J ho tferve pf fonio Jersey hutcl owners
ruling thst waitresses should nut talk to ,
the traveling raienmenV exclaimed the
I Regular Fellow.
lT things come to him who wail. r,o'
,r r she don't hae It coming to her. '
:r- l the Innocent l!stanoer. "As for a
.!;.! wnlm-SK-well, a dumb waiter on a
lrot morning moves with the moct rhlil
log squeak I fvpt hiid. and an our poor,
but proud uliirfwii -an be- m frosty, I
i.on'l v. i;t ijv v,f tljst rt:mbne. for nv.no.
"REPARTEE."
There are times when one (fives an order
that they act 'dumb' enough a It Is. And
anyway I have pity on the drummer. i
"I don't know how 'a drummer would
tart the day right without any cheery
voiced waitress to speak to him her mono
logue about beefsteak-liver ham-and-nas-alngert-or-algs.
A drummer ban no one to
guide him. He lends' a hand-to-tip ex
istence, life with him being one damaged
meal after another, with few chances of
getting home to nestle against a regular
outfit of. eats.
'"tie's got to sprak to somebody to keep
bf. voice In tune for the retail trade, ao as
be able to paaa out the quick repartee
11
bonmoU, and what better training has
ha than trying to slip some bright conversa
tion to a waitress' who Is light there with
a quick, strong comeback which will shar
pen his writs to tackle any reluctant cus
tomer. '
"And ia the proud American waitress to
be denied her constitutional right to paaa
out . the repartee and coffee together? Can
an nature,' feminine, bear to stand
t aa a blue point while soma thick-
ift-cked party with a bulbous, red noae.
ultiple china, puffy eyea and a vociferous
Loretta's Looking
'The large majority of divorces occur in
e first five years of married life."
This isn't my say. It got it from a re
port of a court authority. But It's a
proof of the pudding that I have been
cooking In these articles.
The fatal five yeara! Why are they?
If I say they are fatal because of the fault
of the girls. I suppose even the hottest and
most enervating summer day will not be
enough to reduce to barmlessness the
wrath that will rise and aim Itself at me.
But. Irke Eva Tanguay, I don't care,
because I have the courage of my oon-vy-tlons.
I hare the moral support of
j(( strong backboned - gentleman, who
'""jVld briefly and affectively, be sure ypu're
rht. then go ahead! And, so help me all
the powers that do attend upon an un
selfish determination -to serve a good
oause. I am going ahead, if I break my
typewriter and have to call out the na
tional guards to protect me from the
wrath to coma from my Inflamed sisters.
It ts the fault of women that these five
years are so apt to be fatal to matrimonial
Careers. It's because they are ao stupidly
Ignorant of what they ought to know, of
iwhat they have got to do. It's not a matter
f temperament; It's a matter of Ignoranoe
and inexperience In the ordinary necessary
I Oil
Of I
things that must form the practical base
of any life partnership.
It gives me the wooxles to twar some
Ml
aix
Mutlmental or sensational woman talk
about "the change In a girl s life when she
marries being so radical and so difficult
that she gives way undar.lt." It's such
nonsense. The' human animal In like the
others; . nature has established Its habits
and- its natural inclinations. It's the in
mne Insistence upon reversing or dixre
Karding nature that makes the mischief.
c
jrelWsslMW
hJfn
1
Trying to Keep the Hen Busy
(lood statlHti'.'iuns who make it their bunl
!. to count up all tne pounds of beef.
brctU. vegetables and other things that we
eat every year, and estimate how much we
are going to eat next year, have announced
tlutt each man, woman and child In New
V6rk City is going to eat very nearly a
hole case of exf this year, says the
World, t Pome persons may deny this know
ing as they do taut they never touch egs.
Hut the MKtlnticians only deal ltb aver
ages, and the average consumption, they
declare, will be thirty -doaen etiKs for each
person, home of course will eat more, and
a great many will eat less.
he average for 1919 was twenty-six dozen
tfS for cacti person or Zli egs In j days.
he total number of eggj bought, and
presumably eaten, during last ear in New
York was l.l.ntt.o. These egjrn cont the
consumer fM.O.O.OuO, which is more per eKg
tnau waa ever paid here before, as the 1I10
prices were the highest in the history of
the trade.
il.o-e Mo red eggs, or "held tgica." aa they
aic called In the trade, were carried orr
nto !I1 than ever before. The excess over
a ; yeui was some 60.000 case. The fact
t these "held eggs'" In the coolers are of
. unusually poo.- quality la attributed to
'iclessness In putting the stock away aad
warm w alter during the height of
voice tie wrratl of Hip Knglitih language
around lor bet wrrn Inhalations of roup?
' And l .-n t it a fart that if the waitress
deports herself in u dumb. censored man
tier thp breery nnd loiieumf drummer will
deride tliai if che's too proud to talk she's
enilrtly too haughty to c a dime. Kven
if hp hud a-nmratus he would keep the tip
He' liable to keep h'.s ooe change to spend
in the bar. Toj never heard of the bar
tender twins: prohibit) d from talking, lis
tening or agreeing to the most voluble gab
ber on earth."
"It's tough for the girls," said the Reg
ular Kellow, "but it Isn't a cinch that thoae
d rammer would tip anyway."
"Yes. All do not tip w-ho tipple," ad
mitted the Innocent Bystander.
Copyright. 1H. N. T. Herald Col)
Bathing in Gold
J
A I'aiiHlan Journalist who had speculated
I in railway shares won 20S.00S franca as the
remit of a lucky venture. Drawing It in
Hold, he proceeded to a hotel, emptied the
!hk of gold in the bed and went to sleep
literally in the sands of Pectolus. The
man was so erased by hla good fortune
that he found Indescribable pleasure m
reveling in a golden bath.
I'agaiiinl, the violinist, when he received
the proceeds of his concerts (he insisted
upon being paid In gold), uaed to wash hla
hands In sovereigns.
A French novelist, BouHe, wrote a book
called "The Memoirs of the Devil." It was
successful; the publisher paid him for the
first volume 110.000 in gold. The author
carried the gold to his bedroom, poured It
Into a foot bath, and enjoyed for an hour
the excitement of moving hla feet to and
fro In a bath of gold coins, smoking mean
while the biggest Havanaa.
A Chicago merchant of great wealth, be
lieving certain symptoms Indicated that be
would become Inaane, consulted a specialist
and under hla advice became an Inmate of
a private asylum. For twelve years there
hla recreation was piling up gold coins and
then knocking them over. At times he
washed hla hands In gold eagle and half
eagles. At the end of the long seclusion
he returned to hla business and In twelve
months confirmed the thoroughness of his
recovery by amassing fbOO.OOO. New Tork
Press.
Xoot They Doa't SsaJt.
Miss Elderbud (triumphantly) Just think
of It. At the ball last night I listened to
five declarations of love.
Her Friend How mean of you. Alloc.
Who waa the pretty girl you were sitting
near? Boston Transcript.'
Glass-She Holds it Up
If a man has felt the attraction of a girl
sufficiently to ask her to share his life,
as be wishes to share hers, it's only reason
able and natural that the love should grow
rather than decline in those first five ,
years. The reason It wears out Is because
the man bas to encounter the worry and
wear, the nerves and the complainings of
the girl who has bit off more than she can
chew. He bas made a living attended to
hla work before he got ber. She has gen
erally learned nothing of housekeeping be
fore she rushes brazenly Into the assump
tion of duties which she not only does not
understand but wholly underestimates. She
can't get the potatoes and the steak done
at the same time. She wears herself out in
attempting to work with tools unfamiliar
to her bands. She knows nothing of domes
tics, so he cannot keep servants. She
either Imposes on them or lets them alight
things one course as bad as the other.
Mind you, I am not saying that a girl's
Intentions are wrong. Intentions may be
good paving stones for the place below,
but they cannot run a home. It's the
struggle with the domestlo muddle that
makes nervous wrecks ef women and
drives husbands to the society of the ladlee
who make divorces. And the sooner we
calmly and coolly lay aside this silly old
martyresque notion that the association of
a loving man and woman can cause misery,
and concentrate on the fact that the cir
cumstances which disturb and dislocate
the domestic machinery Is to blame for
those fatal five years, the better for us all.
When the machinery of a home is gotten
to running smoothly, the danger of divorce
is minimised. What devil of croHS-eyed
vision afflicts us Into blindness to the need
for knowledge before we enter the holy
bonds of wedlock? What's the matter
J
the storage season the latter pan
of
March and the first fortnight In April. '
With all the proprea in the storage of
et;irs the demand for the "fresh laid" kind
never has been greater or more Insistent
than It is now. Some folks think it an im
position to be called upon to pay aO cents a
dosen for eggs at any time of the year,, but
as a matter of fact In New York alone
there are literally hundreds of contracts
to pay that price the year round. The only
stipulation Is that the eggs shall not be
more than seventy-two hours old.
The old. old question, "lias a man the
rght to beat his wife?" Is still unsettled
In Seattle. It came up at a taming picture
show. The man in the motion picture gave
his wife a beat 1 rig. A brute In the audience
applauded, and sald.it served her right. A
gentleman in the audience said: "It's no
way to treat a woman." and in the rapidity
of the argument eight chairs were smashed,
a giusa door broken, and a fX fine paid -in
the police court, aad still a Seattle man
does not know what to do when his wife
i us urges. The court refused to pass osj that
question. Minneapolis Tribune.
Put on a Real Show jj
t ( fF THAT CUj ETN
22tJp6i. i WtTBMrl HEW- WTflY,
to the Fatal Five
with mothers, that they do not Insist upon
a training that will enable their daughters
to enter marriage learned in the art of
hometnaktng Instead of as candidates for
divorce courts?
THE Bl'MtLR BEE.
A. BTINQKR..
.Editor
Communications welcomed,
and neither signature nor re
turn postage required. Ad
dress the Editor.
MO ADS AT ANT PRICE.
NO BAD MONEY TAKEN.
Hesalalseeaee.
The filing of an affidavit to
the effect that Christ will re
turn to earth In lDVi reminds
Ye Editor that It la but twenty-two
years since John Alex
ander Dowie shook the dust
of Omaha off bis consecrated
feet and journeyed to Chicago,
where a riper field awaited
the thrust of his evangelical
sickle. Dowie bad given
Omaha the chance, and it
would have but very little of
him. He left an agunt here,
after announcing biinaeif as
the vicar of Ood, clothed wlin
all the powers of divinity,
and delegated to that agent
authority to bind and loose, to
heal and restore, and to do
nuli other things as were
eood for the kingdom of
Iiowie. But the agent soon
tired of the game, and got an
other church in another state,
and the Dowie business went
to smash. The filing of the
affidavit Just reminds us that
tms Is not the first ebulition
of Dowleism that Omaha has
withstood.
Hapsr.
Colone.1 Sir William Kennedy
is back from Boston and
happy, even If lie dldu't learn
as nianv new tricks as did
Jink Monks, while he wait
there. What worries Colonel
Kir William is how his name
got inio the Associated Press
dispatches.
Off.
C. K. Field sends word to
ben Baker that he will have
nothing to do with the repuo
iican ticket thin tall. The
joke of this Is that the voters
thought ol It first.
Kaerciae.
Wonder If these fellows who
pay i0 to get their names on
the tickets ever stop to think
tnat it costs the uewapapers
about tl0 each to find out
how much exercise they got
out of their "run."'
It way.
Moat of the members of i!e
Square Meal club are now
busy yelping about combines
and otherwise preparlm; for a
U'MTnt on the fleslipots
wherever they may be.
(isi-k.
If the democrats bad the
picking of the republican
ticket, would they rot select
the strongest men? Yes, they
would uot.
SniL Weekly Bumble, BelJ-
VOL. I. OMAHA, AUGUST 25, 1911. No. 251.
Wire Grass Valuable . j f Tabloid Wiadom 1
A new. Industry, the cutting of wire grasb,
has developed. In . northern Minnesota In
the lant year. Tlte grass has been found
to be valuable for 'matting and similar pur
poses, and a big company has bought up
large tracts of. It. The cutting Is now in
progress and 100 men are at work In the
different camps. The grass is cut and al
lowed to curs and is then stacked before
being prepared for shipment to the factory.
The gran Is sorted-ftnd the full lenth grass
Is worth as high as S1S0 a ton at the fac
tory. The medium length grass Is worth
much less and the short length grass Is
sold to shippers at about f& a ton to be
used for packing.
The diamond-cutting Industry of Amster
dam has a "waiting list" of 1.000 persons.
0UE AST TREASURES
IN GREAT DANGER'
Priceless Gems la State's
Collection l protected
f rem Theft or Worse.
(From a Staff Correspondent.)
LINCOLN. Neb., Aug. 24.
(Special.) Since the sensa
tional theft of the De Vinci
masterpiece from the Louvre,
much perturDai,on has been
felt here in official circles.
The art treasures of the state,
now housed at the state
house, are practically at the
mercy of any one who might
fancy to carry them off.
Think what an awful calam
ity it would be If one of the
gubernatorial portraits were
removed from the governor's
gallery! How would the state
survive such an irreparable
loss?
Then, there's that battle
scene in the adjutant general's
headquarters; suppose some
Irreverent thief were to
absquatulate with that
triumph of the sign painter's
craft oh, It's unthinkable.
But this Just goes to show
what a crime of omission may
be laid at the door of the last
legislature that failed to make
provision for a new state
house. IKE.
SOME FRIENDLY NOTES
Little Messages that Have
Panned Since the Pri
mary Election.
Dear Doc: I, too, was much
surprised, but It seems that
Felix was much stronger' than
we thought when we made the
deal. Come on In, and we'll
be there the next time.
TOM.
Dear Tom: Like Kelly was.
I know when I've had enough.
DOC.
Dear Billy: Be a sport and
get out of the way of Sophua.
His people won't like It unless
we give them some recogni
tion. TOM.
Dear Tom: If you want em
go bad, why don't you feet out
of the way and watch rtophun
go against Bob? 1 know what
I want.
Dear Dave: What wan the
matter down In the Tenth? I
thought you had that cinched.
' JOK.
Dear Joe: I did. too. but
something slipped. DAVL.
Dear rank: A flag's a
mighty fine thing, but 1 can
think of something that comes
from Washington that I d
rather pee. BEN.
Dear Ben: I wonder what
that can be? FRANK.
Dear Percy: You're doing
well, but for heaven's sake
keep out of sight till after
the 2d. RALPH.
Dear Ralph: I II do It. If it
kills me. PERCY.
Dear Charlie: You may
come home. We can stand 11.
THE PEOPLE.
Dear People: I'm coming.
Did you see my bill?
CHARLIE.
Feuuy.
one would think that a man
with a k..'c0 Job coulu get
along without dipping into to
company's rash, but that in
surance man who is now In
Jail awaiting trial apparently
couldn't. You seldom hear of
a fellow who Is trying to raise
a family on p' a mourn being
sent up for embezzlement.
Uaeer.
Or e wonders if that man
really heard the voice of his
wife calling to him from
heaven. Seems such an in
spiration ought to lead to
something other than car
bolic acid.
Cariosity.
One Is almost inclined to
wonder what the tax levy for
school purposes would have
been If the ft o'clock law- had
not been passed.
Ilea 4 r.
Hon. Airy Lewis and lion.
Quinhy, having stated their
position It seins that nothing
is left but to vote on the
commission form.
Revenge.
Guess that Lincoln buuch
knows now whether Omaha is
easy or not.
Notre ee nor.
John Jeffcoat seems to have
found a successor In Jesse
Brillhart.
Vote.
You'll not have a chance to
vote again until a week from
tomorrow. Then you must turn
out and vote for the commis
sion form.
Located.
Fred Ban horn save that one
of the latest members of the
local Hay Toaaers' association
is Jupiter i'luvius.
Read Ths Bumble
Haste trips up its own heels.
Without power anger is folly.
A red nose makes a ragged back.
Conscience is the chamber of justice.
. The sting of a reproach is the truth of It.
When the flatterer pipes the devil dances.
When the tree is fallen every one goeth
to It with bis hatchet.
The pen of the tongue should be dipped
In the Ink of the heart.
PERSONAL.
Colonel Al Mohler Is glad
that summer Is over, or nearly
so.
Colonel Johnnie Maher was
up from Lincoln. He says
things are picking up down
there.
Colonel Bill Murray's busy
season Is just commencing.
The first show agent of the
fall hunted him up on Wednes
day. Colonel Charlie Black shs
he doesn't expect Brother
Ben will ever come home
since the Giants won a
couple of games.
Colonel Frank Hamer was
In frail Kearney. He doesn't
appear to be much worried
over crop prospect, now that
the primary vote has been
counted.
Colonel Charley Lleweliin
was In town a few moments
on Ids way to Kansas City.
He looks as thnuKh be had
never had u moment of care
or worry in his life.
Colonel Henry t'luy Hlcli
moud wan in our midst for a
few moments last week. The
colonel expects he will be able
to hand the House Journal to
bin subscribers some day this
fail.
BILLY.
OUR POETS' CORNER.
Brans.
The Incident was curious
Those beans proved injurious
And Togo waxed fuiious.
It seems so queer the kind of
i;rub
So popular down at the Hub,
.Snould act so mean Ah.
there's the rub!
Tell mc. admiral, what it
means!
A man inured to warlike
Hrene
Capitulates to Boston beans!
F. B. T.
Those tats.
Mary lisd a Thomas tat;
It warbled like Caruso.
A neighbor swung a base ball
bat
Now Thomas doesn't do so.
Milwaukee Sentinel.
Her sister also had a cat;
Sue . celled the creature
QU'icliie,
The neighbors wouldn't stand
for li
lt rivaled Tetiazxlnl.
Vonkers Statesman.
i Her brother also had a cat.
; Like Hcuumann-Helnk It
sang
Until i loaded up mv gun
And touched It off ker-bang.
iiaatlngs Tribune.
Her mother also had a cat.
That uaed to sing Taoo-
ha user
Until it spoiled its tempera
merit
In a short duet with Towser.
Bee.
FRIDAY,
Name and Adtlre. School. Year.
Beaver Anderson, 2631 Chlcsgo St Webster 1901
Edna Louise Anderson, 4902 William St Deals 190.
Olive K. Beerner, 2018 Ohio St Lake 1891
Willie Robert Bell. 2218 South Twelfth St Casa 1901
Emily Brown, 2322 South Central Blvd Vinton 1891
Earl Bresaman. 1431 Emmett St High 1891
Charles A. Burkman, 918 North Forty-seventh Ave.. Walnut Hill 1K9I
William H. Berrr. 6111 North Thirtieth St Miller Park 189
Amanda Brooks, 1525 Vinton St Castellar 1909
Lysis B. Bush, 2582 Decatur St Long 1898
Carmela Canlglia. 1118 South 6ixth St Pacific 1898
Mae Coutts, 3615 North Twenty-ninth St Druid Hill .......1901
Burke Cochran, 2521 Grant St Lake '....'.1901
Ruth E. Carlson, 4524 Franklin St Walnut Hill 189T
Mildred F. Cone, 4546 North Thirty-sixth Ave Monmouth Park ..1901
Mildred Conlon, 2548 Rees St Mason 1905
Emma Drapalik, 1427 South Twelfth St Lincoln , 1902
John Detweiler, 3524 Dodge St Farnam 1899
Gladys De France, 2219 Douglas St Central 1900
Pauline Devereese, 1733 South Twenty-eighth St.... High 1899
Solomon Fiedler, 1839 North Twenty-fourth St Long 1900
Jo Gay, 101 South Twelfth St High 1890
Theresa Gallet, 6204 North Thirtieth St Monm6uth Park ..1897
Adeline Glbbs, S322 Hamilton St High 1893
Levla Hlddleston, 2220 Pratt St Lothrop 1901
Joseph Holonbeck, 2685 South Thirty-first St Dupont 1897
John Herbert, 620 South Twenty-ninth St High 1893
Alert Hayford, 1913 Oak St Vinton ....1895
Walter Jardine, 102 South Thirty-third St Farnam 1903
Peter C. KJeldgard, 3319 South Nineteenth St. ..... Vinton 189T
Robert Kilgore, 2618 South Twelfth and Bancroft 8ts.St. Patrick 1904
Mary Luplsak, 1213 South Fourteenth St Comenius 1905
Pearl Llndenbaum, 1620 Nicholas St Cass .....'1906
Edgar Landgren, 2437 South Twenty-fourth St Castellar 1900
James Mann, 6122 North Forty-first St ...Central Park 1905
Harold A. Madsen, 3109 Maple St... Howard Kennedy. .1905
Edna Murray, 5116 Pierce 8t : Beals 1901
Israel Melcher, 1904 South Fourth St Train 1905
Nettle Mulr, 2513 North Twentieth St.. High 1895
Emily Nelson, 708 South Sixteenth St Leavenworth, 1896
Margaret Pszonowskl, 2411 Castellar St ...Im. Conception ...1899
Isaac Steruhell, 1410 South Eleventh St Lincoln 1901
Earl Short, 3505 North Twenty-ninth Ave .....Howard Kennedy. .1896
Lillie Schroeder, 3158 South Fifteenth St Bancroft .......1897
Beatrice Schmidt,. 417 Walnut St Train 1900
David Slobodineky, 1154 North Twentieth St ...... Kellom 1901
Stanislaus Sobetskf, 1719 South Twenty-fourth St...Im. Conception ...1898
Haael Stevens, 1338 South Twenty-fourth St Mason 1903
Gazella Schmidt, I6I814 Martha St St. Joseph 1900
Mayer Speesberger, 8010 Mason St Park 1897
Gertrude Talbot, 1018 South Eleventh St ....Pacific 1906
John C. Trimble, 4643 Dodge St Saunders 1890
Lee R. Vandusen, 4819 Leavenworth St Beals 1904
Edward Van Bureh, 3403 South Fifteenth St , . Vinton ,.1895
Ruell Welton, 204 South Twentieth
Eddie Wilson, 3008 Franklin St
Men Who Helped
One of the most beautiful lakes In the
United States Immortalizes the name of
Samuel de Champlaln, the famous French
explorer, who was born at Brouage, In
Haintonge, In 1567, and died In the new
world he had helped to explore In 1635.
It was in 1603 that ne made his first
voyage to this country. From 1604 to 1607
he spent his time exploring the Canadian
coasts, and, returning for a third voyage
in W0S, he founded the city of Quebec.
In 1612 he was appointed lieutenant gov
ernor of New France. Ths years that fol
lowed were devoted to explorations of the
interior, attacks on the Iroquois and voy
ages to France.
In 1429 he was forced to surrender to an
English fleet and was carried to England.
Samuel CHAMPuujr
After his liberation in 1C he returned to
Canada In Id and remained there until
his death.
Champlain was a man of singularly bold
and adventurous Hiirlt and seems to have
had an insatiable desire fur exploration.
Park man describes some of Chstnpluin's
explorations in these word:
"Again the canoes advanced, the river
widening an they went. Great Inlands ap
peared, leagues In extent, and channels
where ships might float, and broad reaches
of expanding wate: stretched between
them, and t'hainplaln entered the lake
whli h pre.-erves his name to posterity,
Cumberland Head wan passed, and from
the opening of the great channel between
Grand Isle and the main he could look
forth on the wilderness sea. Edged with
woous. the tranquil flood spread southward
beyond the sight.
"Far 011 the left the forest ridges of the
Green mountains were heaved against the
sun. patches of snow still glistening on their
tops; and on the right rose the Adiroui
clacks, haunts in these later years of
amateur sportsmen from counting rooms
or college halls, nay. of adventurous
beauty, with sketch-book and pencil. Then
the Iroquois made them their bunting
ground; and beyond, in the valleys of ths
Mohawk, ths Onandaga and the Genesee,
stretched the long line of their five cantons
and palisaded towns.
"At night they were encamped again.
The scene Is a familiar one to many a
L " & v5
3
August 25, 1911.
St Central 1905
....Walnut Hill .....1899
to Make America
tourist and sportsman; and, perhaps, stand
ing at sunset on the peaceful strand.
Champlaln saw what a roving, student of
this generation has seen on those same
shores, at the same hour the glow of tho
vanished sun behind the western moun
tains, darkly piled in mist and shadow
along the aky; near at hand, the dead pine,
mighty In decay, stretching Its ragged
arms athwart the the burning heaven, the
crow perched on Its top Irke an Image
carved in jet; and aloft the night-hawk,
circling In its flight, and, with a strange
w hirring sound1, diving through the air each
moment for the Insects he makes his prey."
tOopyrlght. 1911, by the N. Y. Herald Co.)
Baby in Hard Luck
J
Just after New Year's Michael and Mary
Yraneki were married at a big Polish cele
bration on the Northwest side In Chicago.
Two weeks ago the stork came. .
After Mary recovered Hlie had a long talk
about It with Michael. They agreed on ths
solution a ml Mary wrapped the baby in a
shawl and took It to Km mo Ianinski.
"There's your baby," she said. "Take
care of It."
When Lusluskl . cjiii to the realization
that the stork had come unexpectedly, but
quite certainly, be wan't at all pleased.
With the baby under ocu arm he ran after
Mary a:id durmr the altercation all three
were taken to the Sheffield avenue xtatlon.
Husband uud wife were first rharged
with contributing to the child's delinquency.
Later the charge was changed to aban
lonmeut. an offense punishable by three
ears' impiiBonmnt. This had no effect,
and Judge Walker decided he would take a
few days to consider the case.- None of
the principals can speak English and all
evidence was given in a rapid fire volley of
follsh. Through It all ran one theme.
'1 don t own It." chanted Michael.
"I don't want It." sang Panic
"I won't have it," concluded Mary.
Judge Walker held up both hands and
adjourned the case for consideration.
"Whew," he said. "I have never had
anything like that before. The men are
bad enough, but the attitude of that mother
la something that would tent the wisdom of
bolomon,"
Soaad oh Some otes.
"That man seems to exercise a great deal
of Influence."
"Yes," replied Senator Sorghum.
"Yet he never sounded ths keynote of any
campaign."
"No. He never sounded any keynotes.
But he has signed some exceedingly lm
porta nt promissory notes." Washington
Star.
Bat Ther Hit.
Young Doctor Which kind vt patients da
you find It hardest to eursf
Old Doctor Those who bars nothing fa
matter with them. Boston Transcript.
