TIIK KKE: OMAHA, FKIDAY, AUGUST 4, 1911.
.'HE OMAIIA DAILY BEG
Bounded dt edward rosewater.
VICTOR ROKE WATER, EDITOR.
Kntered at Ornah Dnetofftce aa eecond-
clata matter.
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.
ftundny Hee, one year M W
Saturday Bee, one year 1 '
laily (without Kunday), one year... inn
Jj.iily Uee and Sunday, one year t.00
DELIVERED BT CARRIER.
KvenlnR Bee (with Sunday), per month.. JSo
Dally I!ra (Incluilinf Sunday), per mo.. &-c
Dally Ut 4 (without Kunday). per mo 45c
' ATea all complaints of irregularities
IjX (livery to City Orculatlon Department.
OFFICES.
Omnha The He Hulldlnc
Kouth Omaha-6W N. Twenty-fourth St.
Council Bluffa li Kcott Ht.
IVncoln 2 Little Bullln.
Chicago 1M Marquette HuIMInf.
Kanaaa City K-llanre Hullrtln.
I New Yerk-M Weat Thlrty-tllrJ St.
Vaahinton "25 Fourteenth St.. N. .
CORRESPONDENCE.
Communlcatlona relating to newa and
editorial matter ahonlrt he addrcaeed Omaha
fee. Editorial Department.
REMITTANCES.
Utmlt by draft, cxpreea or poatnl order
payable to The Ilea I'ubllahliiff Company.
(nly J-cent atampa received In payment tit
mall accounta. Pcraonal ehecka except on
Omaha and eaatern exohanice not accepted.
JVLX CIRCULATION.
47,931
tate of Ne'raku. County of Douglae, ia..
Dwlght Wllllama, circulation manager of
Th Uee Publlaiilng company, being duly
worn, aaya that the average dally elruu
latlon, e eno'ltd, unuaed and returned
opiea, for the month of Juiy, mi. l
tT.BH. DWIOHT WILLI AMB,
Circulation Manager.
Bobacrlbcd In my preaence and aworn to
before ine thla 2d day of Auguat, Wll.
(Seal.) ROBERT HUNTER.
abacrlbera lenvln the city em
ivorarllr abld .bate Tit Me
Hailed t them. Atldrraa will be
eba4 aa aften aa repeated.
ttut all havu to admit that he U a
Wiley doctor.
Tba color scheme of the l.orlmtr
tase 1 Browne and White.
Has anybody her BeenSenator
Uoufne'a composite citizen?
"The Watchmakera' Journal ought
always to come out on time.
"Doea faking pay?" Perhapa Dr.
Took or Mlaa Abbott might answer.
;; Doubtless those British lords are
ready to exclaim. "Wbat'a In a name?"
i 8UI1, since Texas went wet those
who voted for dry will not be denied
thelra. J - .' - ' -..
: You will find by looking up the rec
ord of leaping Niagara that all the
fools are not dead.
Somebody ought to see that the
Jesse Jamca moving pictures take Just
one. big, long move.
There is probably nothing significant
In Senator Balley'B attempt to put
.-tenkonaon the free list.'-'
' ' Certain ' Old Masters." If living to
day, would arrested for obtaining
money under false pretense a.
That was a rather feeble effort,
Colonel Welsh, for a man who haB
made weather tor thirty-eight years.
" The commission plan of city govern
ment will be voted on in Omaha Sep
tember 2. Let one and all take notice.
Senator L KGHctte insists that he
will not be read out of the republican
party. Oh, there's room enough for
all
The summer la passing and ou"
friend who beglna her conversation,
"When V ln Pari"." will soon be
here. s
President Taft may have to devise
an arbitration treaty for those bellig
erent democrats If things get much
worse.
Dea Moines Is threatened with a
atleet car strike. Dea Moines haa the
sympathy of 'Omaha born of aad ex
perience. Ethel Darrymore slammed a door
In a reporter's face.- Let the reporter
cheer up and think what happened to
young Colt.
" It rather rushed some of those New
York papera to get their roaata of the
late Edward M. Sbeperd off the stone
to make way for their panegyrics.
Now, if the Real Estate exchange
will organise to do as much to help
put the commission plan through it
will show that it ia playing no
favorites.
Nebraska state bank are now
legally "guaranteed." Nebraska haa
not had a bank failure for years, ao
the guaranty law will have a real
record to match.
A private citisen In Minnesota, as
sisting a sheriff arresting a woman
with a wooden leg, got a splinter in
his finger. Next time he will not lend
a hand so readily. -
There .will be uo special grand Jury
on alleged election frauds. Why
should there be, after those who
! sprang the sensation have accom
plished all they fxpecud by it?
With the buacs full, two out and two
Strikes on the batter in the latter half
of the ninth, Mr. Underwood caught
the ball squarely on the nose and sent
It anlling out over renter field fence.
The ill-concealtd glee with which
Senator Hitchcock's newspaper plays
VP Congressman Underwood's brand
ing Mr. TJryan a falsifier would Indi
cate that the "sting of ingratitude" Is
sti!) at work la the home office.
Democratic Breach Widens.
Congressman Underwood's retort to
Mr. Dryan Is as hot and fierce as Met
calfe's reply to Harrington. Nor Is It
surprising to find that the democratic
floor leader In the house had "the
crowd" with him, so to speak, in hla
attack upon Mr. Bryan. He is in the
saddle, while Mr. Bryan is out. He
was in the forum and Mf. Bryan ab
sent. It is somewhat a cane of present
company being accepted, not excepted.
The really significant feature of this
Bryan-Underwood controversy Is that
it shows how the breach in democratic
ranks is steadily widening and how
Idle and futile is all thla talk of demo
cratic "harmony." At home and
abroad Mr. Bryan has dared denounce
certain tricksters in his own party
and, he being in a position to unmask
them and reveal them as they are,
must expect to bring down the fire
upon his own head. The bitterness
that characterizes the fight at the out
set is far too much to Inspire belief
In an early reconciliation, or to justify
pretensions that a serious factional
fight is not growing within the demo
cratic party.
As to the merits of the controversy,
they are not for outsiders to deter
mine. Mr. Bryan has made clear and
specific charges against Mr. Under
wood, charges of party perfidy and po
litical chicanery. Mr. Underwoods
retort is a direct denial clothed ln in
vective that seeks io give Mr. Bryan
a preferred seat in the Ananias club.
A good many besides Mr. Bryan's po
litical adherents will give him the
benefit of the doubt. The man who
shout "liar" the loudest sometimes
wins In the contest, for the time being,
as political observers in Nebraska will
recall, but even the shouts of an ap
proving crowd v Til not change the
facts or the Issue one lotn. The coun
try has a right to wait for more evi
dence for a verdict in the Bryan
Undorwood case, ond it probably will
not be pushed Into taking Mr. Under
wood's word for evervfhlnt Just yet.
The Hatpin No Joke.
Moat efforts at passing measures to
limit or regulate the length of hatpins
women may wear have ben laughed
out of being, but it is not entirely a
laughing matter, after all. One man
in San Francisco, at any rate, is quite
prepared to view the subject in a most
serious light. In a street crowd be
was jabbed in the eye by a woman's
hatpin and lost the Sight of the eye.
It would, of course, be absurd for
the city or state to go into the busi
ness of legislating the styles of dress
for women, or even men, for women
have rights in this line which law
makers are bound to respect. Yet
when it cornea to a matter of personal
rights, the man who lost hla eye doubt
less feels that his right to have two
good eyes la Just aa inherent and sa
cred as is the woman's to wear the
dangerous dagger In her hat.
The fact la, the woman Who cares
for the comfort of others will not wait
for the law to tell her how far from
her head she may extend her hatpins.
Common sense and modesty will reg
ulate that, and perhaps it is this fact
that deters law-makers from unbend
ing their dignity to deal with the
menace. Since such unfortunate ac
cidents aa the one in San Francisco
have to occur, It can do no harm to
call them to public attention and may
do much good. Unreasonably long
hatpins should be discarded here is
where the "rule of reaHon" cart legiti
mately be invoked.
Commission Plan Election.
Accepting The Bee's commission
plan petition as prima facie compli
ance with all requirements of the law,
and in the absence of protest valid
without further certification, Mayor
Dahlraan haa issued hla proclamation
designating September 2 as the day
when the voters of Omaha shall decide
whether they want to adopt the com
mission plan of city government.
Nothing, therefore, now stands In
the way of Omaha getting a commis
sion plan of city government, if it
really wants It. The fact that
over (1,000 voters signed the pe
titions for submission In less
than two weeks would indicate
that a large majority of our people do
want to try this plan out, and that the
opposition to it la confined to a few
self-seekers with their own axes to
grind. At the same time It will not
do for the advocates of the commis
sion plan to let the election go by de
fault. The election machinery having
been set In motion, according to the
provisions of the law, It will be up to
the people to take the next step them
selves. A Study in Banking.
The first postal savings bank In Chi
cago closed Its doors after the first
day'a business with 461 depositors
and $9,43 1 of deposits, and had to
turn away some eager money-savers
because they wanted to deposit more
than the 1 100 limit permitted by the
law, aa high ln one case as f 500. The
depositors ranged In age from 21
months to 63 years, but the majority
of them were young, many being chil
dren. A good deal Is being said about
teaching children to save. Evidently
Uncle Sam haa found a way to do It.
Any child may become a depositor at
a postal savings bank, It Is so eaay
and simple. These Institutions are
potential training schools, as well as
poor folks' banks. They begin with
the child to Inculcate the valuable les
son of economy and thrift, without
which no life can be successful. The
child with a hank account haa a better
idea of the value of a dollar,, has a
keener Interest In accumulating his
declara tor gcod. than the pn,o who
never ha had anything to do with a
bank deposit. There Is an ethical as
well aa economic side, therefore, to
this great Institution.
The reports say that in the line of
depositors In Chicago on the first day
were native-born and foreign-born
Americans, people of all varying
shades and degrees of the common
walks of life. And the postal savings
system will serve to increase faith ln
the government and foster Interest In
Its Institutions. In thU way it should
be of much help to the government in
encouraging and nurturing the foreign
born immigrants who may come here
with more or less distrust of our in
stitutions. Those who opposed and
for so long prevented us from having
the postal savings system must by now
see, if they were sincere in their op
position, how badly they were mistaken.
After the Water Bonds, What!
The water bonds have been hand
somely carried on a wave of hysteria
cleverly worked up for them, and as
soon as the official canvass is certified
the Water board will have legal au
thority to Issue and stU another
JS, 250, 000 of water bonds.
Incidentally, the board by itself,
and its spokesmen, has made various
and alluring promises as to what it
would do if theae bonds were voted,
amcjng other things, that it would
take "Immediate" possession of the
water works, construct a second sup
ply main to Florence "this year,"
promote the sale of lota ln Dundee by
extending service pipes thero "without
delay," and also "dispose of no portion
of the bonds" until money or bonds
are "actuclly needed to take over the
water plant and to raako Improve
ments and extensions as required."
Assurance has been given, further
more, that the interest on the $ S.250,
000 of bonds will bo carried, and a
rlnklng fund accumulated to pay off
the debt out of the ' water works
earnlnga "without increasing taxes one
penny."
These are all consummations de
voutly to be wished. They are the
executory considerations for voting the
: bonds. It Is up to the Water board
to deliver the goods according to
rpeciflcatlons and without using sub
stitutes. Some of the strong democratic
newspapers of the country are saying
complimentary things about President
Taft these days. Colonel Watterson'S
Louisville Courier-Journal, discussing
the malicious spirit animating the
Alaska controversy, wheh culminated
In the outrageous fraud known as the
"Dlck-to-Dick" letter, sums up the
wholn anMprt hv aavlnv
Mr. Taft may not be the heftiest of poli
ticlana. aa poll! lea goea nowadays, but he
' la a mighty eate man to have around the
White Houao In cmergenotea.
The Oregon Trail commission has
decided to spend the residue of the
appropriation made by the late legis
lature by marking other historic sites
In Nebraska besides the Oregon trail.
The purpose may be laudable, but it Is
not the law. The appropriation sets
aside $2,000, "or so much thereof as
may be neressary," to "mark the Ore
gon trail. If the whole $2,000 Is not
necessary, what Is left should stay in
the treasury.
If you have the proof of the facts stated
In your reeolutlon, we suggest that those
facts ought to be submitted to tho county
attorney, who would undoubtedly take ac
tion In the matter. District Judges to
Water board.
Here is an official Invitation for the
Water board to come across with the
proof; and notice, too, that no special
grand Jury la necessary to procure
prosecution of law-breakers. Will the
Water board respond? Wait and see.
Oovernor Aldrlch warns the people
not to let the railroads and public
service corporations pick the candi
dates for railroad commissioner with a
view to subserving their own Interests.
Everyone will agree to that. And as
long aa the governor does not black
list anyone by name, every man In the
running will insist that it is the other
fellow who Is under ausnlclon.
Still, these Invidious references to
the vote of the red light district
should not come from that source, for
at least two of the three democratic
members of the Water board owe their
places thero to the same vote, and the
same influence, which they must have
courted assiduously when they were
running for office.
With all tho strenuous efforts to
court public Interest, only 8,000 votes
were polled at the special bond elec
tion out of a total of not less than
20.000 qualified voters. In other
words, scarce ly 40 per cent of our citl
cens felt enough concern about It to
vote at all.
Congressman Underwood says that
Mr. Bryan baa been misinformed.
That gives an opening for our distin
guished Nebraskan to unload upon
someone else. Will he accept the
hint? We douht It.
tho ttf tnat, .
t. Loula Globe-Democrat.
The children of Washington have caught
600,000 file thla summer. That beats tho
record of the Waahlngton base ball club
and also 'of the congress now In session
there.
l ead the dm,
Detroit Free Press.
Senator Bailey haa resigned from the
senate committee of privileges and elec
tions. The eenatir la rapidly becoming
one of our foremost relgners. ,
Apparently Nat. i
Wall Street Journal.
A Nebraska admirer of Mr. Bryan wants
his vignette on an Usue of pea age stamps,
iinan't he been Ikked often enough?..
Booking BacWanl
lliisDav InOmalm
3 l
COMP1LRD FROM DF,F. FILFi
AUGUST 4.
Thirty Years Ajro
It Is announced that the city marshal
and chltf engineer will hereafter atrlctl
j enforce the ordinance against partlea burn
ing I ilea of paper In the etreeta.
The congregation of the Danlah Lutheran
church at the corner of Flshternth and
Jackson strectr, hp'.d a pleasant 1c cream
parly ta celebrate the wedding anniversary
of Mr. and Aim. V, Christiansen. Hi?v. Lara
Oyneson delivered the congratulatory ad
diess. The fire department under Chief Galllgan
put out a email blaze In the residence of
Mis. Thomas Hiley on Caaa street, between
'Seventeenth and Klghteenth streete.
Horace King and J, c. King, two men
who have been exhibiting three mountain j
llona at different placea in the city, were
brought up before Judge Beneke charged
w:th cruelty to animals, having fed the
anln-.aa with live cata and dogs. They
pleaded guilty and were fined, but declareJ
that It was absolutely necessary to give
these Hons live animals at least once a
week.'
Work Is progressing rapidly on the new
car track for the new car shops of the
Union Pacific. Councilman O'Keefe ia the
foreman in charge and Is working about
forty men.
Ed E. Howell, having attained his major
ity today, will be associated hereafter
w.th his father In the Insurance business
under the firm name of Samuel J. Howell
fon.
The American Express office and all the
company's wagons are draped In mourning j
on account of the death of James Q.
Fargo of Wells, Fargo & Co.
D. W, Saxe and his brother A. W. Paxe
cf the auditing department of the B. & M.,
Itave for an extended trip to the east and
inelr old home In Vermont. While there."
Mr. tiaxe will fix upon the decorations for
his establishment In Boyd a opera house. '
Twenty Years Age j
Bt:l Lech, "late candidate for governor
on the independent ticket" and state or
ganist r for the Knights of Labor In Ne
braska, addressed strikers at Mets hall.
Mayor R. C. Cushlng issues proclamation
commanding strikers and others not to as
semble for the purpose of enforcing the
right-hour law.
lire. John Riley and daughter, Margaret,
2219 Maple atreet, went to Indianapolis.
A surprife party was tendered Miss Net
tle DeBolt at her residence, 2S24 Charles
street, In the evening. Among those pres
ent were: .Mioses Essie Beemer, Anna and
Alice Hodder, Bertha Montgomery, Minnie
Ogle, Mattle Burdwell, Jennie Berry, Cora
Iktr, Mamie Bartlett, Susie DeBolt, Bird
Lanyon. Messrs. Bert Fowler, E. Hodder,
A. Melton, R Hay ward, C. Frltcher, R.
Beaiy, W. Hendrlx, C. Porterfleld, A.
Donaghue. J. Foreman. H. DeBolt, C.
Bartlett, Garrison, Peri 111.
Ten Years Ago
Thad Brookle, Jealous of Mrs. Millie
Llghthawk, an actress of the lower Btruta,
l.nown as M.nnle Allen, shot and wounded
the woman and killed himself at o board
ing houee at 1307 Capitol avenue, where the
woman was rehearsing for her play. "The
Arlxonn Handlt."
Lintnger'a gallery is reopened after being
closed for weeks. ...
Rev. Edward Frederick Trefz, then pas
tor of Kountse Memorial church and now
an advertising jnuii in' Chicago, preached
on "The Gospel of Usefulness."
The weather moderates enough to allow
policemen again to wear their coats.
M. P. Keefe, government contractor, of
Ci.eyenne, was ln the city.
LAURIEE'S APPEAL.
Baltimore News: The Keenest political
advlHers are confident that the people of
Canada will Indoise the pact.
Washington Star: Canada is now wait
ing to see how much amendment talent
reciprocity will develop among Its states
men. Indianapolis News: The opposition's crit
icism of the dissolution of the Canadian
Parliament doesn't aeem to Indicate thtt
It Is suffering from over-confidence con
cerning an appeal to the country.
Denver Republican: Premier Laurler of
the Canadian government has no doubt
about the benefits which the reciprocity
agreement with the United States will con
fer upon Canada. Ills statement of the
position of the Dominion government leaves
no Question 0n thla point.
New York Herald: The liberal leader
presents a broad and statesmanlike view
of the advantages of reciprocity In natural
products and points to Its Incidental Influ
ence In paving the way for a general treaty
of arbitration. Mr. Borden, on the other
hand, while profenalng that the conserva
tives "welcome" an appeal to the country,
bitterly protects against the dissolution of
Parliament at this time as a violation of
constitutional usage.
Detroit Free Press: A hard-fought cam
paign may safely be predicted aa a result,
but 'at Its outset the shrewdnexa of Lau
rler's tactics seems to be established. It is
hard to see where the conservatives can
hope to make up the Beats they need to
overthrow the government, a nee they al
ready have a majority of constituencies ln
Ontario which may be expected to be more
emphatic In Opposition to the agreement
than any other part of the Dominion. Their
j fighting ground la the very aectlon which
j they already possess, In fact, and ln the
; enemy's strongholds they will find reciproc
ity sentiment too strong to overcome.
People Talked About
'Ihot.jU Mr. Rockefeller regards his gr at
wealth a a burden, he bears up wonder
fully. James J. Hlil cays that Wail street Is
rot finding sufficient pportunlty In thi
cotintry Just now for big outlays cf
money.
The Stanley committee wishes Mr. Mor
gan to tef l.'y ln the f-'teel trust Impiiry,
but is a.Jiaiently l:i doubt whether to send
him a subpoenaD or an ambssjador.
Mayor (Jay nor Mayed away frjm the
ceremony of turning the fiit rhjvel of
eaith for the ctw iuurix r ugh subway,
and now there Is talk of ret-all. It's hard
to please 'em all.
It Is a dainty little tribute to Dr. E. A.
Guldman of the biological ruivey that the
new humming bird wliti-h has Just been
discovered In the Panama canal sne
ahould be named for him. The naturalts
of the Smithsonian Institution find the
tone rarilcularly rich In biological treas
ures. Tho estimate of Timothy Woodruff as a
political leader printed In the Brooklyn
Eagle may ba regarded as conclusive lie
lacked finality" aays Dr. McKelway after
many years of close observation. "Initial
energy he had, antepenultimate and penul
timate flour If h he had. but ultimate reso
lution or aggreaatou he had not." Mr.
Wtodrutf ma not ejulte understand, but
LU-t a it.
Washington Life
Kama iBteTeettns Fhaaea
aad Conditions Obeeryed
1 the Satiuna Capital.
Army Cooklna School.
The army cooking school operated at i
Fort Myer hns turned out another batch
of gradtat a warranted to rout every
symptom of dyspepsia from the army posts
to which they are uslirned. Classes are
composed of from fn to fifteen enlisted
men and the school term lasts four months.
The men are taught by competent lnstru-
Ci to conk all kinds ut food. Most import
ant of the Instruction is bread making.
The school lakery has a capacity of bo
tween 6j0 and x) loaves a day. None oi
the brfad Is used until It is twenty-four
hours old, as It .a claimed fresh bread is
not neaitnrul. Boldlers also learn how to
make cake, biscuits, nles and all kinds of
pastry, and how to prepare and cook meats
and vegetables. The rchool was established
because It realized that the proper feeding
of men was Just as Important as teach
ing them how to fight. Army cooks get
double the pay of privates.
Workls the Free I. Int.
During the debate on the "farmers' free
list" bill In the house of representatives,
Congress Lever of South Carolina delivered
a speech of which he was Justly proud. He
mailed a number of copies of the speech
to his constituents In South Carolina. Ills
references to the effect of the measure aa
putting various agricultural necessities on
"the free list" brought this remarkaBle
requisition from a citizen of hla district:
"To the Hon. A. 8. Lever, Washington,
D. C: Klnde trend, I read In the book you
ent Me that a goeid Meny Importance Is
on the free lift please send Me 10 pairs
oil tan brogans number nines and ten pairs
oil tan brogans number tens for Men, and
ten pairs fine button shoes for Men number
nine and ten pairs fine button shoes num
ber tens for Men flour and bacon please
send Me five bariels first patent flour and
five barrels second patent flour and five
hundred pound chunk meat and five hun
dred pound side bacon and two flnu mules
gears and harness and good new Wagon.
"Shoes for Wlmmin ten pulra fine but
ton shoes number tlshtx. ten pairs fine
button shoes number seven and ten pairs
fine button shoes number sixes and ten
pairs fine button shoes number fives and
ten pairs fine string shoes number eights
and ten pairs fine string shoes number
revens. Verry true.
"P. S. pleas? send Me 250 lbe tubs ov
lard and ten sacks ov corn and ten sacks
ov oats."
Mr. Lever has not yet complied with
the naive request.
Artillery Officer's Veranlilllr.
A caller on General E. M. Weaver, chief
of the coast artillery, recently was amazed
to see thnt officer maklnK noies In short
hand with all the speed of an expert stenog
rapher. A question brought the explana
tion that In making notes on lectures and
In the conduct of his office General Weaver
had found stenography such a help that he
had carefully perfected himself In that
form of notation. Furtherore, It was ex
plained by one of the younger officers in
the office of the chief of the coast artillery,
the general la an expert telegrapher, using
both the Morse and the Meyer systems. Tho
latter, which Includes no spaces In the
formation of the letters of the alphabet,
has now been adopted by the coast artil
lery, and also for wlg-wagglng ln -the navy,
although some operators atlll use the Morse
code. General Weaver also enjoys the
reputation of being one of the finest math
ematicians In the army.
A ftnnppy Talker.
Thomas M. Martin of Virginia, the chair
man of the democratic caucus of the senate
and the titular floor leader of the minority
In that body, is not an orator, but he Is a
fighter. He la a short, chunky man, with
a glorious crop of white hotr, and makes a
striking appearance in the senate chamber.
And when he rises to take a fall out of the
republicans he goes right at the point with
out circumlocution.
"He barks at 'em," remarked a listener in
the galleries the other day when fenator
Martin was speaking on the proposition to
force a report from the finance committee
upon the wool bill. The remark was very
apt, since the senator bites his words off
sharp In a manner to suggest a bark. Ho
Is a peppery southern gentleman, and het
goes at the opposition without mincing
words.
Beats 'Em All.
I'ntll recently there was an aged ele
vator man who operated one of the lifts In
the house wing of the capitol. Most of his
passengers were either representatives or
newspaper correspondents. The old man
got to know all of the correspondents very
well and always had a cheerful greeting for
them. It was often noticed, too, that he
seemed to be greatly Interested In their
ce nversation.
One afternoon, as three of them stepped
out of the elevator, Sereno Payne of New
York atepped ln. As the car went down the
old elevator man turned fend said:
"Mr. Payne. I can't understand about
those newspaper men. They puzzle me."
"What's the troublo with them?" asked
Mr. Payne.
"Well, Mr. Payne, every day they ride In
this car one feller will turn to another nnd
say, 'What do you know today?' And Uit
other fellow. will answer 'Not a thins.
What do you knowr Then the first feller
will answer 'Nothing.' And yet, Mr. Payne,
the papers arc Just full of news every day.
It beats me where they get It."
"It beats me, too," said Mr. Payne.
I'aunual, at I. cast.
Louisville Courier-Journal.
The New Jersey man who sins for di
vorce on the ground that his wife Is a
common flirt should at least admit thnt
she's uncommon ln view of the fact that
she's till years old.
LIKES 10 A SUMJUJEE GIUL.
ixis Angelci. Express.
Sweet b.iminui' .ir., to tla-e,
Yi;ijn of jjuciry.
To lliee ve run;.
Jimt now yuui i ,onuge
Upon the public btiKu
feei-n.s to ue uh iliu rage
iu.ire the real thm.
Down at the sandy shore
1 oa re making fcuod once mure
W hua on paiade.
In our swell balhliiK suit
iou look so tijiii and cuie
Ki.lks say, "Gw. she s a oeaut
V ho is thut maid?"
Arrayed In garments fine,
Wh.n you mruil down the line,
How people stare!
No matter, dear, if you
Dress a la peokaboo
When you are on review,
liy )uu we swear!
Wherever you may a;o
You are the entfte show;
You take the bun!
klen flock where you ban out.
And there they stick about,
0 that there is no doubt
Their hearts yuu've won.
Sweet Summer fllrl. thy grace
Ard anti drug store face
Causes ua joy!
I on will this land be bright
While you are there In lght;
Vi e 11 pralxe thee day aud night,
air maid so co
iekt rrii POINTS.
Drdge Criterion: .Ml the money Is not !n
the banks. The ci'itor g'it a dollar tho olhii
day.
Hastings Tribune: Now that tho timahi
barbers cun rest on funrtny there cm ;ht t
be a large Ine-reare ln the church attend
ance of thnt city.
F r'ngfeM Monitor: Tho Nebraska Antl-,
Saloon league has lost ItJ high priced leader
by resignation. He bus brc.i u ..lorn ln tin.
s do of a number of temperance worker
for some llrre.
Table Hock Argus: There was a very
ttrong feeling In the populist convention at
Lincoln thut divorce procreellnr;:? be in
stitutrd to eever the union between the
democratic and populist I artles in Ne
biaska.
C.rand Island Freo Press: When a womnri
wills what's the use? Mrs. MacMurphy,
deputy food Inspector, condemned throe
dray leads of canned totrmtocs. But she
not only ordered them dumped Into the Mis
souri, but took the sent next to tho driver,
went to the river with the lond.K, arvi
watted until the last can went down to Join
the mythical McGlnty.
f . Schools
- '
Nebraska Military Academy
LINCOLN
IT TAKES MORE THAN AN EIGHT INCH SPACE
to tell you about the plan and purpose of the Nebraska Military Academy.
But we tell you all about it ln our catalogue, and show you some interesting
pictures, too. If you would like a catalogue, addresa '
B. D. HAYWARD, Superintendent
Phones: Bell 1722; Auto 3500. Lincoln, Nebraska,
TABOR COLLEGE t
An accredited school of the highest standing, in a coml i
.
luumty ieiuaj&avj.e iur us
influences.
A faculty of trained specialists. '
Low expenses,
f FALL TERM OPENS TUESDAY, SEPTEMBER 12.
2! Write for literature.
TABOR COLLEGE,
lioratetl in Omaha's llouutiful Suburb.
THIRTIETH YEAR OPENS SEPTEMBER 12TH, 1911
College, Normal School, Musical Conservatory and Academy.
Strong faculty, representing graduate study In Harvard, John
Hopkins, Columbia, Princeton, Chicago, Wisconsin, Iowa, Lelpslc Edin-.
burgh and Oxford.
Stte Teacher's Certificates granted. SuccesKful Athletics De
bating, Oratory and College Journalism.
Expenses modrate.
SEND FOR CATALOGUE.
WENTWORTH XSSSl
Drills. Courses of Study
l.HI.. h ll,,ui. . .. "V. V.r'""; "mill
Ctn, " ('n,
Tito Secretary, IH04
it ST. JOSEPH
COLLEGE AND ACADEMY
Dubuque, Iowa
Conducted by Sisters of
Charity, B. V. M.
College Degrees, Academic Depart
ment, University Affiliation. Excellent
facilities offered lor the education of
young women. Conservatory or Music
and Art. Domebtic Science.
One mile from Dubuque. Four and
one-half hours' ride from Chicago.
Direct railroad connections with Om
aha, St. I'aul and St. Louis. Exten
sive grounds, Pineries. Private Kooiiis
Normal Cuurtre. Urammer Department.
Business Course Private liupila re
ceived. For Catalogue address
Sister Superior
St. Francis Solanos
Gelled
Quincy, Illinois
Co;n.l"te J'riia a' i", CoiumcTrpil. Pe j-n
tlfic. I.'iigKsh nni Cluen cl Coursv.i. apec.a.
iacllUits in Vutiii and iiuti u.nuntal 111 u
sic. To secuic the lur:ill rpuit the sch ol
aitrndunca la IhiaitU to smull number 1.
Sc iid for tatnio.Tue
Very Ilev. Fortunatua llaus.-er. O F. M .
Twcnif -sixth arasON
American
Kimball Hull
to 310
3. Wnbuuli Ave.
C.ilcugo, ill.
Conservatory
On of America's larrmt, moat mcrtuaf ul renter
fur (he atudy ot ail branches of ran sir. Motiora
oura mAuirfuUy taught by 7U eminent uruil.
IS ( per lor Nurnual Train in &'hunl auppliea tea-h-r
fur echoula and owUtgc. FuLuc vfauul Music.
Dramatic Art, Oratory, Physical Culture
ITnnrnlWl frueitdroiitkirifa, '1'lmty free v-hniar-etili
uwintlt-rl. vtiiiiilfiiitiuufl it. 4 toH, KiiM term
tririiM aioiitlur K-irt, lltit. ' 1 1 r t f I iUit'' m-ut
Iti. JJ.LN J. I.An yTAtUr.Frwidtiil.
MOW
FAirrin run.
n"-o m - !!- in a kiss " said
tie Fclr-tirt. "I o'l't cere," rrpled the
kiiumer risut luiiii. "A nnemhe cant
i v n , tiT o .fi .o n a ot piotoie.e case."
a-hlng o i Buir
He I pi from .c.e to Norway through
.be pine to: ; t.
Mii-Hnr ; i.i idiil ; I love pl.ie.-.pplea.
Throne and Coitr.iry.
Lmlv (n t.ar.-.p who had been commls-Flo-nd
M find Ivv 'nst puenlle) "The poor
1 i dni'iti . tV' ' yoo ir.i V?n'.''
Tramp ". r. n.n 'ml 'lin. tilths tl-l io a
I oh , ni.il wus cleaning the windows with
iin." M. A. P.
"I :i'i'ro!i''iiiir wife Is enjoying her sum
mer cottage."
"Not very much She bav three women
vMttiiit bor. on oh or n different kind of
diet." Wash inu ton Herald.
"Sometimes you have to hit a man to
make him keep unlet so that you can save
hl"i from drowning."
"Yes, nnd the time tn elo It Is when he
flrrt begins to rock tho boat." Boston
Ilec lt d.
"My girl wants me to tench her to
swim." "Well, why don't you?" "I don't
know how to swim. 8he won't care about
ihnt if you are the right fellow." Houston
I'oM.
1 t
ciean. wnoiesome, u pill ting 4
Best facilities.
- - TABOR, IOWA.
ssaausMssstsmk
iOBBimmmP& JI;est and l.irvest In Mld.ile WesL
. uovernment HuiiervlHluii H!i?hit
by War Department. Infanin- a.hii..-.. ff'M,f
urrnnr. i',. 1 r.,u r-i ,i.:., K
Aeparte
UVJT.. I' Of IU I U I O U (J, U'
oierty.
Washington Ave.,
Lt'Yiuglon,
Mo.
Racine College
-i v.'inj:. wi.seoN.siN
, ,SlIio'1 that imikeH manly
boy."c.,er Jur.lu-r. Whwlow.
Prepares boys for any univer
sity or business. H'glieat stand
ard of intellectual, physical and
moral train.nff.
New swimlng pool and sanitary
equipment.
Boys received from H to 18
years of age. .Separate school
room and dormitory for the little
boys.
The booklet, "The Itljjht School
for Your Hoy," will explain tho
aims and methods. Illustrated
catalogue also.
Sixtieth jear begins September
2 1 . 1 !i 1 l .
Kev. William Francis Shero.'Ph.
D., Warden tnd Headmaster.
KEARNEY MILL
TARY ACADEMY.
Mllltn r TmI.i..
I -...... cum.
Lined kiui Acaileuiio anil
.1. ,ueia .uume. develops
the I udiea and rinuda of
',;, mi,, Aiunly, bucceaa
ful Men u build up a
Iactei and m tiie habita
1 lint ui.ilio tiie buy tha
4ui.. , -
- ."orii .1411,
ri... . 1. ....... . .
"ui hi ui-iiiii a,..,,,,.,, ure niKn.
Our clu.ixic and Hcienl lie rourael
;ue;)aie fur all college. t)ur com.
lucrci.il murbea pituaiv tur Luaiueaa
Write for I'ltiatrnted r.italo?ue.
Br.SY 9. Head Maater,
Kearney, Jfb.
HASTINGS COLLEGE
ZrattlstfS, Nebraska.
"The Growing College."
Kev.' l.Huury New liymnualum
Very Sloluraie Kiciuea
Superb lAnitlun
L'nexrelled Facilities
Write for a int.iUnrue.
THE OMAHA BEE
iiread by people who wants cold
- T
1 r
!
j facts in news that is newt. .