Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, June 27, 1911, Page 11, Image 11

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    Tim bet:: oaita. ttjekpat, ttsTj rr. itht
Serious History in Comic Vein
SnrrcKV f
ork Town."
r TorV Wilrnn slvea up, but ft has
known on one ort rare mwkmt
te com across." Mid F bow-Me Fmtth. the
huttilh "riiworlait, he opened a - Ireata
eunlV of "facta and neer-farta.
"rJnf bt " the it at all stingy. Oh. no!
I must ay she floe "give you a run for
your money-when you're got the momw
rut I .nfrfT heard of her eurrenderiag hot
net. : - .
"And W't been Invaded by almost every
kind of king ra f r heard of, too. Silver
fctacs sd cepner kings and rotten king
and rattle kings; imported king and a
few aces. They've played Broadway t tba
Mm It and bombarded the town with fTf-n-barka
(111 It 'looked like a i-abhege stall la
tue jrark,et, but they never mad her give
ka er.. boiler .'Nuff:' They always" got a
rwa .for their, money, and tba tcvtrm waa
leoktug tor TOOT.
Bwt this time I'm ppeftkmf of wti rhen
.";. ii "I1
Broadway, but aa a matter of fact. It win
only be Broad way-by-tbe- Sea, a pleasant,
Hi Me ad'unvt.te tba Strand and Piccadilly
rta tba ferry. And whila you wilt be glad
enough - to tarry here tong enough to ae
rummulate roln of tba realm you will
ba .gladder atill to ret aboard tba ferry
and, aa yon put it ao dellghtf ully. "Coma
"We'll promlsa that no daty will ba (to)
lacted on cnin. . fl'i make that concession
to suburbanite. If you don't bellvs ua,
count up tba commutera who ara surren
dering their glittering aimoleona"
"That makea no difference." aaid Father
Knlck, telly; "you will recall that wo put
ona over on you In tba king Hno ence."
"Rightor aald bla visitors cheerily, "but
from tha way tba moneya going down over
there tt Inoka Uka the kins la tba ona beat
bet. doesn't It? Do you give upr
"Well, I nerer waa know to ba a tight
wad." aaid Father Knirk.
(Copyright, JW. by tha N. T. Herald Co.)
In Days of Old
Cbeaaa waa mentioned by Arlatotla la Kit
b. c. ,
Fine creamery butter waa made aa early
aa ISM B. C.
Egypt ia IHS
C. -
by Joseph . la
First bridge waa built at Roma in CM B.
C., spanning tka Tiber.
a bunch, of seeing New York visitors runt
ever, from . tba ther aide with soma new
Ideas , la .tb king line and proceeded to
make themselves at home. They prided
themsetyes ua. their red aweatera and golf
coats and announoed their firm' Intention
ef, having ever) body over bera wear tba
same -before, they got through.
"Because New York. . you know," . they
aaid lo Father Knickerbocker. 'ia only a
aubarb anyway, .aad wa propose to run a
regular, ferry over the ocean, and make
yoa people commute to tha real town, over
tba way. Tou may think thla- will ba
Arithmetic waa Introduced
Into Qreere about WO B. C
from Egypt
Term "gentlemen" waa frl-ren ta tba well
! ear-ended la Erf land about 14KL
tr. Johnson and Sir Joshua Reynolds
founded tha flrat literary club. It waa ta
17. .:
Parasols . were used by tba ancient
Egyptians. They became generally fasbr
lonabla In tha United Etatea la 1830.
' Pneumatic tuba ayataio originated with
Dennla Pa. pin. aa Kngllahmaa. In 1MT, and
waa put Into una In tha Xoodon poatal bust
case ta IBM.
Ftrat library at Roma waa chat C Pavlua
Aamillua, and waa created 167 B. C ' fn
tha aama city there were twenty-eight
public Hbrariea in tba fourth eentury.
Loretta's Looking Glass-Held Up to Woman W ho is Money Mad
aarnaaax wvBWin mm umi rajaaiai aara aw acaaj tax at am "
(rCoFt, t isjut k
- ccnrr at. f S IwAiua ttrnmiv I 91
J ra pif ri anWJ v i cvtl r-' V-J
- I cm, trr rm mwm r r1
1 CMCK IT tQH T1 wT I 1 I .
"-Ttl,-"; iY P2; 7j 1 1 ' I 1 W jmKt. arcieaartl
-, ( UXt5KV. X WA rttuZ niMj0t
I rafs wmt t I Ml UT; vJ H iwHtL.
aP '
Eyi 1 1 1 1 -1 t'Uzzri li - l
' " " " '': -4-
f f
J ' Di& pk?0S0Phy j Good Thing, Push It j
i i
This is (he Day We Celebraie
E Jim,'
June 26, 19 1L
Xante and Addrewa. SchcrJ. Vrar.
Mtrrloii Anienon, till Hgwtboree Ara.., Franklin. .... "
Ellta M. Elack. Booth Fifty-aiUh St Peala ..1 HIT
R07 Byland. 1107 Karan Et.T. Vinton . ...18
Henrietta C. Brandell. 4122 North Twentr-fourth St.Saratoea 10!
Madeline BarK7. S1 Sahler St Monmouth Park.. .10I
Margaret Bolt. 1514 South Fourth St. ... Train ........ ,188
MarrharetU Burka 1642 Park Ave. High ......... .ISIS
Vernon Burge, 2202 Harney St... Central 104
Helen M. Condon. 2619 Chicago St...... Central ........ .10I
France D. Delaware. 2660 Jonea St Mason ....... .10S
Stanley Dillon, 2212 North Nineteenth St Lake ..........18S
Gordon Ellis. C12 North Thirtieth St Webster .1222
Cealla Feller, 2506 Franklin St... High ..........1825
Melrln Goldatrotn, 1812 Tar Ave. ............. park ......... 1208
Mildred' Green. 1916 Amea At Saratoga .......1905
Robert Hillock, 5206 North Twenty-eighth St Saratoga ..1898
Leonard Hammang, 810 8outa Thlrtr-Afth St. .... Coiutnblan '......188
Margaret Hnber, 915 North Twenty-fourth St ....Kellom ...1896
Agnea B. Jacobaen. 4121 Lafayette Ave Walnut Hill. .. ..1896
Wallace Jeffrie. 2514 South Twentieth Are. ..... .Vinton .....1904
Dalaey Kepher, 1024 North Eleranth Bt Holy Family 1899
Ernect E. Laraen, 1117 North Eleventh St. ........ Cut ........ .1901
Ethel Lanahman, 401 William St...... Train ........1901
John MontaJbano. 625 Pacific St. Pacific 1904
Frank Morrow, 1411 North Twenty-aeTenth St. ... Long .......... .1908
Charles M. Manneck. 8621 Lafayette Ave.V. Franklin ......1901
Mabel Mickaelaen, 8002 South Sixteenth St Castellar ......1901
Edward P. Murphy. 1S27 North Nineteenth St.... .Lake .1899
Catherine Murphy, 2208 North Twenty-fourth St....C&i ......... .1901
Earl Peteraoo, 2015 Cast St Webater 1901
Edwin R. Pearce. 405 North Nineteenth St Central ....... .1897
Sam J. Peterabn, 2561 Manderaon St .....High .1891
Andrew Peterson, 4524 Marry St. . ..... ....... .Colombian .......1698
Martha Roman, 2860 Davenport St. .............. .High .1894
Raymond Roberta. 2726 Camden Are.......... .. Miller Park. . . . ..190C
Erria Rutherford. 2227 ETaaa St. ......... M. .Howard Kennedy. .1817
Emily Rudloff. 1612 Corby St Lake .1904
Theodore J. Ryan. Forty-alxth and Caatellar SU....Beali ....... .-.1901
Stella RacUey, 4627 Far nam St. . ..High ...1892
Lodie 8todolna, 2217 South Twenty-eighth Bt .Tm. Conception. ...1902
Charles Sorenson, 1609 North Twenty-seventh St. .. .Long'.. . 1901
Charles W. Taylor, 615 South Thirty-third Bt. . . . .Faxnam .......1906
Frank Wolf, 1506 Canton St Bancroft .......1694
Helen Wagner, 1721 South Fourteenth St.........,Comenlus .......1902
Rerswertna Wooley, 8824 Charles St ...Walnut Hill 1897
Anton Weiss, 2461 South Seventeenth St. .......St. Joseph. ... ...1904
Christina Zeth, 1917 South Eighteenth SUM....A..St. Joseph..... ..1898
K t 6f
Tou are really craay. Crimtnala are'
pleading tnaanlty t, eeeape the punishment
cf thelr acta. But tha lawyera have to
work prove the defense. It aeeda no
lawyer to demonatrata your mental aber
ration, Tou ara ydur own beat or worat
Not three yeara .ago' you met a woman
en tha atreat and. cut her. Oh, no! Not
with 1 a knife, for your mania doea not
take that form. Tou cut her by not epeak
tng. Why? Because ahe waa poor.
Now h. hr tleh. And the other Bight
yoa met her -at a din. Tou rushed up
to her. Tou fawned, upon ber. Tou re
marked about the beauty of her gown. Tou
praised, her lovely hair. Tou gloated over
tha pendant ahe wore. In ahort. you bad a
vary, vlolenl attack of your maala'a fit
ef money' roadneaa sweep ever you.
Do' you think she did not know why J ou
had cut her then aad why you were
fawolag now?. Do ou think your effusive
and fulsome Cautery aoothed tha wound
yovmada yeara ago?' lo you wonder that
aha wa barely polite? Now. whea ahe has
laaa need of you you fling your attentions,
your obsequious flatterlea over ber Uka a
deceptive web. Tou fairly enmesh ber m
tha tangled- .wrgprlng. But aha doea not
aoftea ta your approach. Tou ara barred
eut ef ber life aa affectively aa aha can
taltC"--- ' '.-.f ' " --."-r"-
Taw jaoaey mania baa ' made you a
eevage hi your cruelty. It baa made you
a parasite In your mannora. . It baa robbed
tVu of your dignity aa a woman.
It'a aiUy for any one to care wbea a
money manlao cuts. Every ona ef ua ought
to be sensible enough to despise and forget
Instantly the alight of a woman whose
Judgment la regulated by tha gold stand
ard. But wa are hot. Somehow, It tears
one of the raggedeat wounds from which
a heart can Buffer.' It'a auch bitter, bittei
drinking to find that we were loved In our
prosperity ,f or what wa bad rather than
what a a were.
And you, the money manias, ara tba one
who most often bolda tha draft to trem
bling Upa. If wronga done by Intentional
oversight, by beatheniah cruelty Of man
ners could ba puniahed aa tha wounds made
by hands and deadly weapona may, )
would be suffering a complete Imprison
ment, ahut from tha -society you abuse,
starved of the things that money buys aad
yt u adore.
But there la -no auch way to reach yoa.
with a brawn well-being that stirs up a
vary bell of rev cgif ul and canker eg emo
tions in tha victims of your mania, you
seem to tread a charmed way. But it la a
narrowed Judgmeat that thinks yoa happy
and satisfied. Tou, with all your madness
for money, have too little to satisfy you.
That ta ybur curae. And even If you bad
millions upon millions, it would still find
you dissatisfied. Tou want mora, mora,
more than any ona else? Tou want pt
letrmise and govern by tha power of
wealth. Tour colossal ambitions to spend
and to show the wealth you owned would
ba forever made your punishment, for
soma one else m ould have made mora thaa
your much.
Teu want all the money la tha world.
Ifa a part ef your mania that there should
never be enough for you. Tou suffer. But
I wonder If you will ever suffer as yoa
have made others suffer. Ah I It takes
i strong hand on the rein of one's wishes
.0 keep them from running sway and be
coming ' wild hopes that you may know
tha paia you have made others feel!
"President Dlas." said a Chicago rail
road -inaa with headquarters in Mexico,
"used to have a gruff, caustic kind of wit.
"I ottos dined with him in Mexico City,
when the subject of Dash cams up Daab.
a staid millionaire of 7t years, who had
sloped with bis Jfi-year-old stenographer.
"President Dtas philosophised. I thought
rather neatly on this matter.
" "Wen ba said, "not vary man ts made
a fool of, but every man baa tha raw ma
terial m him.'"
Carc-fal of His Paster.
Tha Vicar Certainly, I will call
year daughter if aha is so very ill.
which church do you attend T
Ths Caller Wa don't go to no church
we're chapel people
The Vicar Then why didn't you send for
your own minister
Tba Caller Ir! Wa wouldn't tiak 1m!
Why, it's scarlet fever. Ths Sketch.
The Rev. Dr. Aked, at a farewell dinner
1a New York, aald of aa ovarsaalous mis
"Neither with tha heathen nor with our
own people does tt do to advocate religion
on mercenary grounds.
T know a manufacturer who last ZSaatdjr
told all his hands that be would pay then
If they went ts church. Accordingly tha
hands all went, and a fine, brave shew
they made. Tba manufacturer, searml
their ranks from bis pew, swelled with Joy
and pride.
"But after the service a foreman 1
proachad and said:
Boaa. the fellers want ma to sak yoo
If ws corns to church again tonight Ao
wa get overtime T "
Ife Dlflerraee.
Danvers 1 you believe there Is sack a
thing as honor among thieves T
Cynicue Certainly not- They are Just
as bad as other people.
Da Greata Basaball
'Oh. grata game ees baae
t For younga Mericsn,
But, O my trend, ea not at all
j 1 a tberag for Oaguman.
j O". leea've; pleass. 1 ia.1 to yoa -.
About waa game we p ay
Wea grass u grera aa' aky oes blue
An' ett eea holKlav.
Fpasattl aa : -W taka treep
For play da ball, aa' eee
JWheech aide eea aeea da champashaep
For Lieell Kctalv "
ee off for.Polo Groua" wa go
V rlh bae la an but.
'An' eiart 4a grata gam, bat. Oh.
' Eeet eea no feemsh yat!
Vpo'atre eea da sea for aide
ll wait for catch da ball;
BpagatU nine eea first dat tried
Kor knock eet over wall.
An' ao tHuigaiU cum' for bat.
Aha! da greata man.
So beeg, ao fat! Ia han'a he gat
Eea Uka two bonch banaa'.
Epoiau-o pert eh da ball, an' dera
f pagaru s bat eea aweeng.
An' qufwck da bail up eea da air
Eea flv like anytheeng.
Tou know een draa came eea man
Iat'a call da "Is ft f.el'."
Wal, dees waa keep peatiutta ataa'
An' like for seeia' steel.
An' dough dees bail &pa-atU heet
Ees paaa by hera way.
He don ta care a leetla beet
Eef eet eea gon' ail day.
Da "centrafieloa man" eu know
I at a nea' to bem ha call.
"Hi! Why don'ta Jompa, J'.
An rua an' gat da beilT"
But Joe he Iumi aeeia sieell
Teel ball ea out a eight.
Dee mak ao mad da oentrafleT
He eea baygeen ta fight.
Dea com a nudder maa you sea
I don'ta know heea name.
Or how you call daee man. but ba
Eea beeg man eea - da game.
He eea da man dat mbk' da rule
Tor play da gama rtht.
An' ae bee earn' l doe iwb foot
Out sen da fieT dat fight.
He push da centraflel' da ' way
Aa' aoocha namea he call '.
An' deo be graM.a Joe aa' aay;
"Com', rua an' gat at ball
, But Joa eea gruwl an' tal beem: "No,
Fee nut for me at ail
Stgatii hert da ball, aa' so
Pltti gat da ball!"
Oh. grata game eea baae ball.
For yeunga 'Meflcan.
But, O my trlewd, eee not at a9 -.
I tbeeng for Dagomaa,
.Waal ef
The croaeeyee
activity of N
"What a big !"
bla friend,
Tha very atout lady
looked at him angrily.
"altad your ewa buatm
he remarked ts
standing nearby
wa buatneaa! aha saap-
YA3,rAl55K.rrYKrnYJWHATA8Vt U?t?VeTS" i waWtfLSToA
etaAACHARrAtOtlft! f fait L ' l -!SorNLY- V s " .
Pair Women of the White House
Andrew Jackson, tba seventh president
of ths United States, was a widower wbea
ba went into ths Whits House. Ba married
his wife nndar very dramatle drcum
staaoea. She was Mrs. Bobarda, living un
happily with ber husband. Captain Re
tards, who became insanely Jealous ef aa
tanooent friendship between bar aad Gen
eral Jackson.
Ear divorce from Ro bards and ber mar
flase with Jackson were warped end
twisted by Jackson's political enemies into
a scandal, of which Professor John Flake
wrote "Herein soma ef tha bitterest ef
his many quarrels bad their source. His
devotion to Mrs. Jackson was Intense, and
bis pistol was always ready for the rash
man-. who should dare to speak of ber
After forty years of happy and honor
able wedded life. Mrs. Jackaoa died on
December 22, 1S28. Eba suffered from a
weak heart, and ber death waa hastened
by accidentally overbearing aa exagger
ated report of ber personal history.
Ia ' the following spring, when Jackson
came to tba White House, tha social duties
were discharged by bis niece, Emily Don-
alaon. who waa born in Tennessee and died
there in ISM. Bbe was a daughter of ona
Donelaoa. Captain John, and tha wife ef
another, Andrew J. Donelaoa. The prest-
! sI V. v..t,
f :f-r t -"-
; -i-w'-: 5
e--.. ... ir: Jrf. ' '
. sv w -
t JT-S l:k.i .A-',":
jMikc of ht i-
dent 'alwa
Another hoetesa at the White House dur
ing Jackaon'a administration waa hit
daughter-in-law. Mrs. fiarab Tork Jacm
eon. Eha waa the daughter of Petes
Torke, of Philadelphia, and tha great,
granddaughter of Judge Torke, who bald
aa appointment under the crown of Great
Britain before ths Revolution. She mar
ried Jackson's adopted bob soon after tba
Inauguration, and came to ths Whit
House as a bride.
(Copyright, lau. from ths N. T. HeraldJ
Do Fishermen Lie?
Aa eastern man tells ef catching a trout
that was so tat aa to excite bis wonder
and hs determined to Cnd out what mads
tha fish so bloated. Hs eut a bole la tha
fish, when est Jumped a Hve mink, which
ba grabbed and put in a cage. Another man
eaugbt a fiah that, according to bia story.
waa as broad as it waa long, and ha beard
what Bounded like a duck quacking la Its
Inside. Burs enough, when It was opened,
there waa a live dock which bo collared,
by the Beck. While doing o be felt some
thing bare In Its crop. It proved to be e
woman's chain purse, which contained
tut tn bllla.
Another fiahermea complained bitterly
that whila fianlng every part of his bodyJcaugbt another frog instead of ths fish.
waa fairly cool but his bald pate and whes '
bs left tt vacovered for any length ef tims
the aun would barter It. Bo every time bs
went flahing bs got a bunch cf live garter
snakes and kept them In his hat so that
their clammy bodies would keep his bald
bead cool. A curious thing happened to e
baas hunter. Valng frogs for bait, bs got -a
wood strike and played the fish, but lest
It and ths bait also. Putting on a tress
frog aad casting to ths same place tha
baas struck again and leaping above th
surfaoe, got away. After reeling la ts set
ths bait, bs foond that the hook contained
two froga. Tha fish had seised the second
frog before he gorged the first and tba
books fastened oa as that tha second frog .
On with the Dance
Bcbottlecha, a German dance, begaa about
forty years ago.
Gallup, moat rapid of danoea, bad Its ori
gin In Hungary In 1821
Paoaion for dancing waa most strongly
manifested in savage halloas.
Polka started In Bohemia ta 1830. First
danced in the tnited States in l&M.
Bolero, the Spanish national dance, ts as
oropanled by raatanota aad singing.
Pirouette was a favorite dance la Egypt
more thaa 1006 years age
Hornpipe takes Its name from a wind la
strumeet on which ia produced tuneful
strains as aa accompaniment for this eoua
try dance, which originated In Englaed.
Eailora' hornpipe Is better known te Amerl-
Shakers worship constats largely of
dancing, which ts a uniform movement to
the vocal muaks of a byma. usually that
entitled "Whila the Wheels of Progreaaloe
gw Rolling Around." and the clapping ef
bands. t
smeary, toe. Don't oommlaerats with thee
on their weakoeaa or you will urohhlv fall
Into Blake plight.
' 1 told father,' aald Blnka, that hs waj
getting too old and f eebia tor business.
suggested that be retire.'
"''And did your father take that advlot
kindly r a friend asked.
' 'Hs kicked me downstairs.' aaid Sinks.'
"Tou say Jones la doing settlement work
Tea. He's a UU collector." Brownitir
. alUrteu Dt
Bines 117. LC7.SW divorcee have
granted ta mvrk s end over four million
persons have been the principal.
CeMelda't Blaff Pav.
"t?ac!e Joe" Caanea eald of ths veterans
of the civil war the other day:
-They look old. but they took teugk and