The Omaha Daily Bek FOUNDED BT EDWARD R08E WATER. VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR. Entered at Omaha postdfflce as second Class matter. TERMS OF rBSCRIPTION. undar B, n rar.. $2 50 Paturdav H, om year... l- i'elly ftne (without 8in1ar), on year. ."0 Dalljr Mf. and tiinday. one yaar 109 DELIVERED BY CARRIER. fvenln- Bn twah flundar), per month. Jc 'ally (Including Sunday), per mo.. fo kafly He (Without Punda) ), per mo.. 46o Aridrrns all complainta of Irrejtularttlaa In deliver? t City Circulation Department. OFFICES. Omaha The Bw BulldlnK. South Omh-tf.' N. Twenty-fourth St. Council Bluffs 1 Soott Bt. Lincoln is Little Building. thlcano 1 Marquette Hulldfna;. Kansas Clty-H.ance Building. Vork84 Went Thlrty-lhlrd 8t. W aa nine ton 2S Fourteenth 8.. N. W. COMRE8PONDENCB. Communications relating to ntwi and editorial matter ahould b addressed iHnaha Bee, hdltortai Department. . REMITTANCES. Remit bv draft. at)! 1.1 Ihl Ilea Pi.hll.hln. I'nmnanv' ttily a-cent stampe received in payment of TOounu. rersonai cnka except on vmana and eastern exchange not accepted. Mr CIRCULATION. 48,473 BU.0,.,i?br",t' County of Douglaa, m: lwignt JViUlame, circulation manager of Te Baa Publishing Company, being duiy f.w2"l, ' thmt th verage daliy oTrcula- lion. lelta anni lA ..... 1 i . . "Pjf for the month of May. Hill, was ,. . , ..Circulation Manager. Bubacrlbed In my presence aod awora to Uoro, vm uu" ut "y of June, 1911. (Seel.) ROUEKT HIJNTER, . - Notary Publio. abherleers earn (ho ally Urn 9owUr tktiU aave The Bo mailed to those. Aadroaa will ho aga as eftea aa repeated. The lureat curt for typhoid Is tbia food old Nebraska ozone. A alJttjr-foot painting is offered for ale at a New York art Institute. How much a foot? The west need not be considered woolly JuBt because of Mr. Bryan's ac Urlty oter schedule K. The New York board of Inebriety Is planning retreat for Intoxicated per sons. It should begin at the bar. . It Is to be noted that Dr. Wiley has had Tery little to say about how to cook meal since he got married. It is a slothful Kentucklan who can not hustle around enough to get a "coIonel," to hook onto his name. Kaiser Wllhelm has not yet told us what he thinks of that sample arbitra tion treaty we sent as per orders. At any rate, the garbage emergency has sufficed to create a 11,100 Job for a "superintendent" Next emergency! "The cocktail follows the constitu tion." observes the Stt Louis Times. Yes and sometimes plays the mischief with It.-too. ..xv .rv;. The most unklndect cut of all is that Mrs. Carrie Nation in her will repudi ates Kansas and names Washington. D. C, as her place of residence. The Board of Equalization threatens to boost the assessment on automo biles. The autolsts would rather pay th money into the police court A vast treasure amounting1 to many millions has been reported as found off the coast of Honduras, No wonder Mr. . . . . . aiurgan waaioa 19 negotiate that bond Issue. " i V ' ' There apooars tt V. movement in th. Vnloa League club 'Jo putting Mr. Hints under for putting V. iorlmor oyer.-In-4! ana polls News. , r'j , Merely cue of the ups and downs of politics. 'i : . ... . ; . I Our Twelfth ward councilman says he has reconsidered his announced In tention to resign. He should have sprung It on April 1. when folks were 'due for the Joke. The Nebraska Bute Funeral Direc tors' association will hold Its next year's annual convention In, Omaha. All right. Just so long as we are warned la advance. -v After more mature deliberation the Board of Trade speculators have de cided that the wheat crop was not all burned up after all. Small favors thankfully received. Twenty-nine pool halls have already been licensed to do business In Omaha subject to prescribe regulations. That tells why It took so long to get action on pool hall regulation. The best way to admonish the police against brutal practices Is to divorce the police . brute from the force promptly -whenever decapitation is In vited by such exhibitions. - . Collier's rants President Taft to give Louis Brandets the next place that opena in his cabinet, No guaranty, however, that Mr. Brandels will then save Uncle 8am f 1,000,000 a day as he did for the railroads. In his effort to be the big noise at the coronation, our Mister Jack John son has Invested In 11.600 wth of clothes and Jwt are wining to venture a reasonable sum that they will fullv offset any disturbance raised over the kl::g. IA his stuck ou "King Caucus" Congressmen Llndburgh of Minnesota Is quoted as saying: . - One parson euts vry llttla figure hero ItnJeaa ho la In the swim with the boeeea, -aa tnen nt ts worthless to the people. We protest in behalf of our Con gressman Lobeck, and In his name we Ceny the allejatloa and defy the al- . . Another Great Conspiracy. Our old friend, Edgar Howard, In his Columbus Telegram, this time with the active aid of "Ig" Dunn, has uncovered another great conspiracy, tr perhaps we should say a con tinuation of the old conspiracy, to put Sir. Bryan out of commission in the next presidential campaign. This Is to be accomplished by packing the Nebraska delegation to the democratic national convention with at least fif teen out of the sixteen delegates fa vorable to Governor Harmon "or some other corporation candidate," and for the further purpose "of adopting a platform which will be a repudiation of every principle for which Mr. Bryan nas contended. The opponents of Mr. Bryan are to play a "sneak game." They already have a slate" contain ing a set of delegates to be elected next spring to the democratic national convention, and every name Is the name of a man "ready to support a democratic candidate acceptable to the criminal trusts." These enemies of Mr. Bryan are naturally emboldened by, their easy success in turning Mr. Bryan down last yesr In the Grand Island convention, and look to the same leadership, with the added pres tige of his election as United States senator, to repeat the performance at the next turn. TO spectators pa the other side of the political fence, who have also seen signs of the democratic storm brewing in this state, this, of course, is all very interesting. In fact, the editor of The Bee months ago made a friendly wager that Mr. Bryan would, himself, head the delegation from Ne braska to the next democratic national convention If he so desired, and at all events would control a majority of the votes of the Nebraska delegates. Edgar Howard, however, is correct In signaling the danger that threatens Mr. Bryan and his friends unless they bestir themselves. A three-time presi dential nominee without his own state to back him In the national convention would, Indeed, be a sorry figure. Let the merry war go on. ' Crops and Sains. Bankers and grain dealers inter viewed as to the coming grain cron in Nebraska and adjoining states, they having a very direct Interest in it and excellent means of keeping themselves accurately Informed, to a man dis credit the talk of crop failure and In sist that as things stand Nebraska and Kansas would have normal grain crops. As the bankers and grain men were talking the sky was clear. Nothlnr in Uhj weather Indicated early rain. Yet within twenty-four hours a rain of rather -general scope felL Its chief significance relates to the estimate of a normal grain crop. A tlraer rain should, then, make the croo a little Letter than normal. At any rate, oc casion might be taken for reassuring the "calamity howler" and serving no tice on the "market bull" who may b responsible for the short-crop talk. Happily, conditions do'not lustifv that kind of talk, calculated to have a de pressing effect on business. So, watch the grain ripen, listen to the corn grow and avoid premature lamentations. A Place to Get Off. The post-mortem inquiry Into the abolition of the department military headquarters at Omaha, and certain points, is to go on. but is .not likelv to yield sny. satisfactory results ex- wy iwaioiy to give representatives in congress, who were ' caught naDDlnr. something on which to base a plausi ble excuse. The Army ' and Navy Realeter. usually a fairly safe echo, of the War department, reiterates that the three division arrangement is past possibil ity of modification; that the War de partment has come to the conclusion that economy and efficiency may be advanced la re-establishing military divisions, also that there is nothing en during In the conduct of military af- lairs in this country, slnco military divisions were abolished for the mili tary departments la the interest of tne army and are now to be restored. The changing back and forth does not. It assures us, enter Into the question at this time. It has been determined that It la a benefit to restore divisional headquarters, and nothing that local business Interests may urge, with all the pull at its command, should be permitted to frustrate the purpose of the War department." The signi ficant part of Its discussion is this ad vice which? the Register gives, and which we may bo sure will be followed with alacrity: ' The only safe thine? f.ir a. anatnr nr representative who ts beeet by theao re munstranoea la ta ahlald himself from the wrath at borne behind the inoxorablo War department. Foundation Sill Amended. The bill before congress authorizing the Incorporation oi the Rockefeller foundation as a permanent Institution bss been so amended as, It ts believed, to eliminate the objectionable features which. In its original form, gave rise to fears that la time the fund might get beyond the government's control. To perpetuate a fortune so gigantic without definitely limiting th pur poses to which It might be devoted. would, it wss relt, imperil funda mental publio interests. Senator Gal linger, therefore, has effected such changes In the bill as now seem to commend it to those who feared Its unrestricted power aa at first Intro duced. It Is worth noting that this fear was not based on a belief that Mr. Rocke feller was specially seeking unlim ited powers for himself or his fortune In th future or that he has not In this THh HKK: enterprise been actuated by unseifloh motives, but It appears, nevertheless, to hsve been reasonably founded, for there was nothing In the original bill to define the purposes, In the way of limiting them, to which the fortune might or might not be devoted. If this measure Is brought within the purview of safe legislation, the country will be vastly enriched by such Immense legacies as this philanthropy will bestow. Art, science snd Indus try, in their varied aspects, will be come the debtors to its benefits and generations sfar Its heirs. No matter whst may be thought of such vast for tunes as that possessed by the Rocke fellers, one must welcome the oppor tunity to put them to work for human ity, which Is what this foundation scheme proposes to do. Conflicting Views on Eeciprocity. President Taft declares that the real opposition to Canadian reciprocity comes directly from the big trusts. Senator McCumber declares that Is ex actly where the support of the plan comes from. Senator La Follette says he believes in reciprocity and believes In reciprocity with Canada, iut de nounces the present measure ss a "diplomatic bargain masquerading In the guise of reciprocity." Both Senator La'Follette and Senator McCumUcr as sert that under this bill the farmer would be the loser. Then, as If these conflicting views and statements were not confusing enough to the lay man groping In the dark for the truth, the additional charge is made that Senator Root's amendment ou paper and wood pulp Is submitted at the instance of the paper trust, and the senator, himself, is disposed of as an agent of the money power. On the democratic side, we have Senator Gore of Oklahoma submitting amendments after tt had been plainly stated that any amendment to the bill will be tantamount to its defeat; Sen ator Bacon splitting hairs, as usual, in an effort to kill the bill on techni calities, and Senators Williams, Stone and Kern standing shoulder to shoul der with the president in support of the measure. Anybody who 'can find his way out of this labyrinth of discord and mix ture of ideas is entitled to the release. In the meantime It would not be sur prising, in the event of the bill's pas sage and the adoption of the plan, to find it wielding a far less potent In fluence either way than has been pre dicted for it. It will not be surprising if It cuts a far smaller figure econom ically than It does politically, except In the way of promoting the friend ship of the two countries. . ' '.- I An Orerzealons Spokesman. Chancellor Day of Syracuse uni versity has broken his long silence With an old-time curtain lecture of the people who are working for larger popular rights and more equitable re lations between the public and big business. He scolds the people for "meddling" In the affairs of the cor porations, for imposing on the state and national statute books laws regu lating the conduct of these corpora tionc, declaring: ' ? . The country has never seen a time when Its commerce of air kinds was so Involved and embarrassed by unwise laws created by men utterly disqualified by bualness In capacity and Inexperience as today. We are doubtless making mistakes in our attempt to bring about a better system of corporation control, but, on the other hand, we are achieving some headway, and will more. Nor can our hands be completely tied by such reactionary forces as voiced by Dr. Day. Even the heads of these great corporations have come out boldly ad mitting the Justice and the wisdom of reasonable governmental control and regulation. A few of them, notably Judge Gary of the Steel trust, Presi dent Delano of the Wabash railroad, Mr. Carnegie and President Vail of the Bell telephone interests, have even declared that we must have this regu lation, backed up by fair and full pub licity of the affairs of corporation management. Chancellor Day will not charge these men with business incapacity, or that they are seeking to Injur the big Interests. Neither Is this govern ment seeking to embarrass legitimate Industry. And it is a great pity for men holding positions like that of Chancellor Day's to say so. It always militates to the disadvantage of both the government and the corporations for zealots to overstep tholr bounds with such exaggerations. And now W. R. Hearst claims for himself and his newspapers the credit for bringing the popular election of senators within reach of the people. To say nothing of the other forces that have dop more, someone should put In a claim in behalf of Senator Wil liam Lorlmer and the New York and Illinois legislatures, on the theory that the devil is entitled to his dues. -- I South Dakota is celebrating the fif tieth anniversary of Its organization as a tcirltory. Nebraska has more than a passing interest In this event because Dakota was originally a part of the territory of Nebraska, and continued so for seven years. Not only this, but the Dakotas have been largely cottled and developed from Nebraska. The president of Mornlngsld col lege at Sioux City, a Methodist Institu tion.' Is to be retired for alleged heretical preaching. Heresy T What Is that? Any relation to Insurgency? Rebuking the Charleston News and Courier for having advocated the elec tion of McKlnley In 1898, the Houston Post virtuously declares: "Th Post has supported the democratic nomJr OMAHA. 1 1 1 IjKSD AV, ' .TTJNE' 15, lfll. nees, national and state, all during Its existence." Only on the theory thet "open confession Is good for the soul," can such admission be justified. The Los Angeles Express says It was so hot In Omaha one day last week that a street railway rail twisted. Of course, that statement Is slightly twisted, but according to the veracious San FrancUco Examiner exactly that thing happened In the summer resort by the Golden Gate. Lark's Favorite. Washington Post. Now Colonel Bryan has attacked Chair man Underwood. Pome men are born In Kentucky and move to Alabama, but If luck's with 'em they' can't be kept down. Great as a Hereane ProHocer. St. Ixuis OIobe-Iemocrat. A surplus In the national treasury of 19,000.000 for the fiscal year thus far be gins to look as If Uncle Bam will have a good Annual balance to show June 80, tx clualvo of Panuma canal expenditures. The much-abused tariff law Is doing Its part well. If lie Had tho T!g ta GIto. Baltimore American. A university president Is warning the students of the Institution against beoom Ing merely millionaires. If he can flrid means to impart how this ambition can bo attained, sordid though It be, the univer sity Will have to enlarge Its boundaries and then always have an overflow waiting list. IJiEAJY TRUSTS. Oao Thoaaand Combines Affected by Recent Derisions. New York Financial World. There are about one thousand industrial combinations In the United States whose form of "organization and business methods come more or less directly under tho da cl.iions in tho trust cases handed down by tho United States supreme court. Under these decisions combinations In restrsint of competition are not forbidden, but only combinations In restraint of trade. Combinations for the purpose of oppress ing competitors and monopolizing trade are Illegal, and thela. heads arc liable, under ths criminal provisions of tho Sherman anti-trust law. It is doubtful, however. whether the government . will Just now be gin a crusade against many of these trusts Rather Is it reasonable to suppose that the government will first permit tho convicted trusts to arrange . their affairs and split themselves up under the supervision and direction of tho lower courts, so that other trusts may then see how tho thing Is done and how they may also escape prosecu tions. A Kill, therefore. In tho government activity against tho trusts would now seem no more than natural. NEBRASKA PILESS COMMENT. Beatrice Sun:' When the. law requires you to pay $1 for a'llcense to fish, It looks as though somebody should guarantee the catch. Here's room for another guarantee law.-. Bloomlngton Advocate: There are now over 18,000 automobiles In the state, and If they are worth, on the average of 11,600 each. It la very easily figured out where some $27,000,000 of Nebraska capital has gone. Piattsmonth Journal: . Having Just fin ished examining 1.000 law books to see if the milkman ot this town have violated tho "rule of r7ason" provisions of the trust; law,1' we (V the public's pardon for the slight fog In our mental landscape. Kearney Hunt Ex-Governor- Sh&llenber ger announces over his own "stg" that he will he a democratic candidate next year for United States senator, and that, too, notwithstanding that ho has been "urged" a' great deal to be a tcandldAte again for governor. Tho es-govsmor states that he la In no sense campaigning now la an ticipation of nex year's primaries, but is just throwing out a few words "prelimin ary" so that all his friends may know. Red Cloud Argus: A business (T) man came to one of the Argus editors ths other day with a halt column article aimed at catalogue houses and Incidentally roasting all who might buy from such Institutions. He thought it i would make a good article for publication, hut when we suggested that he pay for . it and run it over his own signature, he couldn't see the point We pointed out to him how we, too, were In bualners In Red Cloud, and that he, among others, not only did not advertise to draw trade to the town, but that he gave his order for stationery to the trav eling solicitor for a foreign printing house. The argument ended without a fight and we believe, that fellow now has a better Idea of tho general order of things. The notion seems to prevail almost universally that business med are under no obligation to. tho horns pagers, hut that the home papera should devote all their space and energy to the protection of home Interests, People Talked About Tou would hardly guess It from his name, but ha was born in Scotland and Is presi dent of the Highlanders of New York. Among base ball fans be Is known as "Papa" rarrell. The Ak-8ar-Ben push overlook a thrill ing stunt in failing to Induoo King Cora to sing his famous song. "Oh. How Dry I Am." A Boston man who waa knocked cWwn by a street ear In St. Louis apologised, when he was able to stand u again, tor having obstructed traffic. Royal etiquet performs curious capers. King George V's great undo died recently. Then the earl and oounteas of Darby gave a dinner and dance at their Loudon resi dence. The king and queen wera present at the dinner and had a gav time, but, en account ot tho death of the king's great uncle, they did not remain for the ball. Nice discrimination, that. The thinnest man in he world was mar ried by Municipal Justice John It. New comer ot Chicago the other day. "I had to look three times to see hi in." said the Judge. The man is Artnur Atherton, 24 years old.. Thoug-h five fet high, he weigha only thirty-eight pounds. He mar ried Blanch Buokley, U years old, who weighs I poupda." Around'New York Ipples on the Onrront of Ufa as Sees la the Oraat American ' Metropolis from Say to Day High on the wooded crest of puyten Duyvlll, 300 feet above the waters of the river first navigated by htm, stands a great fluted column, 100 feet high, on the top of which ts soon to be placed a statue of Henry Hudson, from whom New York's great river takes Its name. Karl Bitter, the sculptor, haa completed a model of the statue. Hudson Is represented In morion snd leather Jerkin, worn for protection against Indiana, full, baggy knee breeches of his period, and high boots, such as he might have used for protection In landing and tramping In swamps or among bram bles. The mariner wears a sword with ornately wrought hilt that a captain of that age might have fancied. The figure bears a short Spanish cloak, for at that time Spain was dominating the fashions of the world, as haa France In later periods. On account of Ita altitude, for Including the hill the figure will stand 115 feet above the level of the river, the outlines have been made clear and strong. The bearded face of the mariner is entirely Ideal, as there is, so far as known, no contsmporary portrait of Hudson. The expression of the face Is strong and. conveys an air of anxiety and thoughtfulness. Ground waa broken for the monument on July 6, 190D, and In September of that year ths cornerstone was laid by Governor Hughes. The column, which waa designed by Walter Cook, Is now complete and is ready to ' receive Mr. Bitter's statue, as well as the decorative tablets at Ita base sculptured by Henry M. Slirady. The fig tire of Hudson Is of heroic else, being fif teen feet In height. The total cost of the monument, including statue and tablet, will be 11,000, of which amount 141,000 has been raised. Elsie Rangold, a maid employed by Frank V. Molloy, a contractor, who Uvea In New Rochelle, waa discharged for being impu dent. Thereupon she attacked Mrs. Mol loy, and then went to her room In the attic, where ahe began to tear things up. When Policeman Bussard arrived the maid had ripped up the carpet, broken the mirror and torn the bedclothes In her room. She fought him until he called two linemen working nearby. Then she threw hcrsslf on the floor with her clothes wrapped about her head and kicked. The polloeman and linemen tied her ankles with heavy electric light wire, but. aa they were unable to get her down the winding attlo stairs without the risk of injury, they tied a rope about her waist and let her down from the attlo window. She was taken to the station house In the linemen's wagon with the policeman sitting on her. Judge Bwlnburn gave her the choice of paying a $10 fine or going to the county Jail for ten daya. Aleck MItchel, who arrived In New York from Scotland three weeks ago, was stroll ing up Eighth avenue, when at the corner of Twenty-eighth street he spied a man who later said he Is Harry Stevens, a waiter. Aleck mads a Jump at the man, throttled him and held him down on the sidewalk until Patrolman Steward worked through the crowd and relieved Aleck. Last Thursday night, so Aleck explained to the police, he was walking along West Twenty-third street, when Stevens picked up a pocket book a,few feet ahead. In the pocketbookeame story was a tl bill, some small silver money and ths stock idlamsnd, ring. The man' Was good enough to shew his find to Aleck and to invite htm to go to the nearest pawnbroker's, bock the ring and divide the proceeds. The man hadn't gone a block when he ran Into an eld friend, son ot a Jeweler," who offered the lucky finder of the ring $100 ' Not much! The man with the ring ad vised Aleck that a pawnbroker would pay more than $100 for the ring. With the three ball sign iu sight, however, the man de cided that It would be Just aa well to take the $100 from the "jeweler'a son" ,and led the way back to the "Jeweler's son's house," In front of which they had met that expert. On the way the man offered to sell out his share In the ring to Aleck for $32, or all the money Aleck had wltth him. And upon reaching the house the man went In side to get the "Jeweler's son," leaving the ring with Aleck as security. And there you are. Aleck, after a lohg wait, went to a pawn broker's with the ring. Why, the diamond was no diamond at all glass. The contents of the postcard ware brief but Important: "Dear Madam: Is not your door bell out of order T" Signed by the name of a de partment store. To the basement door and up the first floor ran the woman, pressing both bells repeatedly. Neither rang. "They are broken," she said. After summoning an electrician she tele phoned to the store for the history of that admonitory postal eard. "Oh, yes," said the bead of the Informa tion bureau. "That is one of our new rules. Goods were delivered yesterday for some one In your house, but no one came to the door. The bells seemed to be out of order and the delivery boy reported It at this office. In homes where the family are out a good deal a bell might be broken for three or four days without their finding It out" "My own eomrapn sense and ths shoe elerk permitting, I shall never wear an other pair of tight shoes," said a woman, "but If I should be Inveigled Into making muself uncomfortable I know what I shall do to allay tho pain. The ministrations to the aching feet of a man who called on my Italian cobbler for relief showed me a remedy. The man's shoes pinched In three different plaoes. Having located the pain ful spots Rafael dipped a long""etrtp of canton flannel Into boiling water and held the cloth stretched tightly across the man's shoes. When the water began to evaporate he dampened the cloth again and repeated the process several times. " 'Now,' said he at last, "your shoes are set to your feet No more hurt.' "The man gave him a quarter, which I thought a small prloe to pay for relief from a pinching shoe." Mlas Dorothy Whitney, the Junior league and others Interested In New York, sub scribed $270,000 to build a home for wags earning women. It la not a charity by any means, but Is a hotel where women without families may live for a reasonable sum. The average price Is $0 week for room and board, but thera are rooms that rent for a little more. Every modern con venience Is Incorporated Into the plan of the house, which has Just been completed. Crttlea Coafoaaaea. Boston Herald: Those who gueaaed that Mr. Tuft meant all kinds of rolfchlef In sending troops In to Texas will probably not take the trou ble to acknowledge what the withdrawal of the border force now seems to proe, that army maneuvers on a large scale were located In southwestern Texas becauae grave poaslbiUUae'lay In the Mexican revo lution, now happily ovar. TAPS ON THE FUNNYB0NE. "You've aol Poison In vour avutem." M tha doctor to the patient who thought he hail malaria. . ! "Maybe I have." he admitted, "maybe I (have. I don't rat anything but whst Is guaranteed under the pure food law." j Judge. "What makes that man keep saying he la not a candidate for nfftce?" "1 don't know," replied Henator Sorghum, unleaa It la In the hope that somebody will come out and contradict him." Wash ington tar. Poet The verses which you are perusing are the precious children of my brain. Kdltor Poor little orphans. Life. Unsophisticated Cook If you plcaae. mum, the butcher says I'll get t per cent on all the orders ,1 give him. What does that mean? Mistress It means, Mary, that we shall have another butcher. Boston Transcript. Willie-Say pa, you ought to see the men across ths street raise a building on Jarka. fa (absently) Impossible. Willie. You can open on Jacks, but a man la a fool to try to raise on them er I mean It must have been quite a slitht Puck. "You seem to believe in advertising." said the Impatient customer to the mer chant Whfl ho.l n n. . . .1 ( I . . . sale at cost; "but you've got only one rn,r.iu.i, iV wan vn a Fiore inn or people. Your faith nun. . . i ----- .. " M " 1 1 "Hilt CIIVUU, Good day." "Are vnu rmlmtA tn ih. ki .iA MMM elect?" Inquired the busy usher. fN O. "Then what Inlarui k.r. -, .u. ceremony t" I i m the defeated candidate." Washing ton Herald. rBAME WOBX OF CORONATION ODE Ixmdon Punch. Uplift thee. Uuse, and sing us how and when Beneath the shadow of th tjrm Pm The King of Kngland and the Queen were uuwiieu-. With lumtl-timti-umt! stand round ti nave etui to put the finishing touches to my Ode, but 1 want to make the . scheme of It public before the other poets come out with theirs, so that no one can accuse me afterwards of plagiarism.) Uplift thee. Muse, and sing us why and where So many what-d'you-call-'ema alt and stare Upon the King of England and the Queen In tooral-ooral umtl-somethlng sheen (You see the idea.) But most uplift thee. Muss, to tell of those Who, for the lack of necessary clothes. Or else berau.M they do not like a crush. Remain behind at Bewdlay-on-the-Mush (Our village.) Their hearts beat Juat as loyally as If, Clad In a somethlng-umthlng collar stiff. Or In a lumtl-tumtl harem gown. They'd left the country for the Stifling town. Loyalty burst from every heart In spates, But, most of all, from Mr. Aanllng-Uate'al (Husband of Mrs. Hanling-Bate. He has very kindly lent his hill for the bonfire. There r:il be a pause here, while the vicar leads the cheering.) Ix, lightly dawns at last the day of Kings Of Pomps and Power and Pageantry and things. When to the abbey goes beloved George Ter-rumtl-umtl-umtl forge or gorge (This line doesn't look very promising at present.) Archbishop, bishop, dean, archdeacon, priest, Gathered from north and south and west and east. Duke, marquis, earl, baron and baronet And viscount, too, In solemn conclave met Salute him England's monarch "George the Fifthl" (Tremendous applause, led by Mr. Ban-llng-Bate. I hope It will go on long enough to hide the tact that we are going to lose a tine here. The fact la, there Is simply no rhyme to "fifth.") Light Up Your Store; Ilr.ileixhant, orz P-1 and prove to jeople that you believe in your city and in your business. Demonstrate that you have confidence in your goods by exhibiting them under the searching rays Df electric light. Back up your claims to being wide-awake by making attractive window displays and lighting them up, so that you will get 18 hours service out of the win-, dow investment instead 'of the , 12 daylight hours. Let . people know that you 6tand for progress and efficiency in square dealing and full values. Money spent for good Btore window lighting is just as necessary and just a profitable as money spent for clerk hire. . , . -.....'. Omaha Electric Light & Power Company SHORTEST LINE TO DOUBLE DAILY SERVICE , Low round-trip summer excursion fares to St. Louis, Detroit, Buf- falo, Niagara Falls, Toronto, Mori-'u treal, New York and Boston. Through Car Service From Chicago Information regarding rates, routes, iJerths, etc., cheerfully furnished. AGENT FOR ALL STEAMSHIP LINES H. C. SHIELDS, G. A. P. D. OMAHA, NEB, Wabajsh City Ticket Office, 16(h and Farnam Streets IVA LT H A Kfl ssraa WATCH tsszxy RAILROAb men measure seconds in distance. A train a quarter of n mileoff sched ule, is liable to accident. The necessity for tune- accuracy makes Waltham the tailroad-man's Watch. nil i me j on Chrticd a Waltham" Send for Deerrlptlve Booklet Waltbais Watch Cs.Wsltkssi.Mau. -"Juat, Gay" HORLIC.tyS It Man Original and Ginutn MALTED MILK Tht Fcod-drinV for Ail More heailhful than Tea or Coffee, Agrees with the weakest digestion. Delicious, invigorating and nutritious. Rich milk, moltej grain, powder form. A quick lunch prepared in a minute. Take no rabstitote. Ask for HORLICK'S. . t"" """ 0Ava nra ,'m,'l,h'An o PERFECT TeotliPoudor cleanses, preserves anrj beau tifies the teeth and imparts purity find fragrance to the breath. Mothers should teach the little ones its dairy use, Tha Highest' Bale We can ever charge under our Franchise is $4.50 per month Business and $2.00 Residence. These rates will frive ample returns vn the nvestments. Our present -' rates "' are Business - $1.00, . Itealdence $1.00. , ... ,.. , .. , Ktelephone A o if'-.nJi S r-rtv)ii y- hefnr.tni7 B awiassraei I