THE BEE: OMAHA, WEDNESDAY, MAY 24, 1911..
The Omaha Daily Bee
FOUNDED BT EDWARD ROBE WATER.
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Entered at Omaha poatofflo a seoond
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acrlkra lew t1 tk.e tty Isan
punrtly kal4 have Tka Bew
. saali. tm chosa. AUnm wUl
nn4 mm fta wa a-nti.
The last excursion of tra.de booster!
is always the boat
The supreme court did not say the
Standard might not reorganise.
Calling the roll of that new Mexi
can cabinet sounds like a hire of bees
swarming.
How Is It that no enterprising nor
ellst has yet seized on the opportunity
of coining the Lorlmer case?
The Baltimore Sun Is fixing Itself
for trouble. It published the popula
tion of Houston, Tex., at 44,633.
In declaring he will live to be 150,
Uncle Joe Is only perpetrating a nature-fake
on our. esteemed Dr. Osier.
What's In a name? Perhaps we
shall see, now tbftt the Wichita ball
team has been transferred to Pueblo.
I
"Grand Jury to Take Short Rest.
San Francisco Chronicle. Grand
Juries evidently are perennial in that
city.
J
Chicago papers, complaining about
the 'chairman of . the city council; de
clare "Too much Twigg."'' Do a little
pruning.,. .
Jack Johnson told a New Tork
magistrate, before whom he was haled
for speeding, that he was. being Der-
secuted. Well, look at "Jeff."
King Ak-Sar-Ben is contemplating
making one of his parades this year a
competitive beauty show. King Ak
SarvBen gets more bold as he gets
older.
Omaha wants to be advertised, bat
It does not want to be advertised as a
place that has to have vigilance com
mittees doing business as a regular
institution. '
Next October California - will vote
on the proposed amendment for a re
call. "Boss" Reuf will scarcely know
the old state when he gets out, four
teen years hence.
. And still when a person stands tin
the threshold . of the. average legisla
ture and looks over Its members, he
can have little complaint coming at
"Jadge-made law." ..
! ' " l'W ,
: It Is only the lropy , of fate that
makes a man deliberately jump off
the bridge to give a Job to the coroner,
and then cry for help as soon as he
strikes the water. '
Mr. Rockefeller saves $41 on his
personal tax return this year as com
pared with last year's, which will help
that much to offset any loss entailed
by that supreme court decision.
"Six negroes lynched In Florida."
It is to be hoped this will not arouse
" the professional jealousy of v Missis
sippi snd prompt that great common
wealta to attemptto outdo Florida
If Madero la not detained by work
In Mexico for the new government,
he might hasten north and fill a few
chautauqua dates for some of our
congressmen who are tied up tem
porarily at Washington.
Some folks are worrying as to
where the money will come from to
pay for conveyances for city officials
to ride In the municipal parade. No
need to worry over that. There
should be plenty of accommodating
volunteers when the purchase of more
automobiles for the city Is always a
possibility. ,
The local democratic organ accuses
three democratic councilman of sn
"set of betrayal" In voting for a re
publican for president of the city
council. When the republican coua
cllmen voted for a democrat for city
attorney and again for a democrat for
city comptroller, It was, la lta eyee, of
coarse, an act of patriotism. To an
outsider they look like parts of one
and the same deal to divide the pie.
Lorimer Again and Yet.
That the Lorlmer case is bot ' a
closed Incident, and will not down,
must be pretty well demonstrated
with three different sets of resolutions
before the senate for reinvestigation.
It only goes to show the Irresistible
force of public sentiment refusing to
be satisfied with the former finding
and the vote of exoneration by the
senate by a majority of four.
All that has developed In the form
of new evidence since the close of the
last session of congress has tended to
discredit the senate's action In not
holding his title to his seat faulty.
The consensus of opinion Is that a new
Investigation will reverse the ruling
of the last senate, and that Lorlmer's
tenure is good only so long as ' his
friends succeed In staving off final
action.
The unfortunate part of the new
turn In the Lorlmer affair is the un
disguised effort to seise upon It for
party advantage and political capital.
The case ought to be decided strictly
on the law and the evidence, but a
threefold attempt to control the In
vestigation Is discernible by the re
publican regulars, the republican in
surgents and the democrats, each In
spired by a desire to get some prestige
out of It, or, at any rate, to prevent
anyone else from getting prestige out
of It. So far as the publio Is con
cerned, it would like to have the
truth, and the whole truth, about the
Lorlmer election as soon ss possible.
and then wipe It off the boards.
Business Outlook Brightening.
The Standard OH decision, progress
toward peace In Mexico, seasonable
weather and promising crops combine
revive confidence and make for a
brighter business outlook thsn ap
peared upon the horison some weeks
ago. They are factors which already
ave,had the effect of stimulating se
urules as a forerunner to better
trade In commodities. Bank clearings
have showiy an Increase, and steel, the
pulse that usually Indicates the condi
tion of the market, manifests a de
cided tendency upward.' In spite of
continued contraction and price con
cessions.
Nothing approaching a boom Is
predicted, nor Is there sny" wish or
need for one, but the prophets of trade
generally feel that, with a substantial
conservatism underlying, business will
proceed along encouraging lines for
the year. What of uncertainty was
felt over the Den dine- derision nn
Standard Oil has been allayed, and
that, undoubtedly, has a very helpful
influence, though .It is not to be
doubted that more was made out of
this uncertainty than circumstances
warranted. That is generally the case
with stock markets. But since confi
dence is the basic element, after all.,
in. .business, t Us restoration means
much. : -' , , j, ..
' Better, than all else',' the country is
almost bound to ntn V hnmM, har
vest this ' season and to command
fairly ' good prices. Overflowing-
granaries are sever conducive to hard
times.
Grappling a Tough Problem.
Governor Aldrlch has made the first
move to enforce the newly enacted
Albert law by officially calling upon
the county attorneys In this and other
counties to see that it is put into ef
fect at once.. This Jaw contemplates
the complete eradication of the social
evil by the use of power of Injunction
against publio resorts, and in theory
la the most drastic legislation on this
subject that has been proposed. ; The
law nearest akin to It is that enacted
two years ago In Iowa, where there is
still a decided difference of opinion
as to what results It has produced.
The social evil is naturally the most
acute in the larger cities, and efforts
along the line of the Albert law have
almost invariably simply scatteredhe
undesirables previously confined
within a red light district. What the
result will be In Omaha, assuming
that a vigorous law enforcement pro
gram Is carried out. Is yet to be seen.
We believe the problem must be at
tacked more with preventive meas
ures, or at least that preventive meas
ures snd repressive measures must go
hand in hand if the resulting condi
tions are to be better rather than
worse.
Magic of Publicity.
St. Louis and Baltimore, two of the
strong, conservative cities that bor
der on the, southland, are planning
campaigns of growth and expansion,
disappointed and dissatisfied with the
progress made in the last decade.
Both recognize Judicious advertising
as their modus operandi. They real
ize that sny advancement they make
must be along industrial lines and to
achieve that they must advertise their
home-made articles of commerce.
Wider distribution of manufactured
products and the creation of new
marketa depends upon how well known
they make their wares. This the pro
moters in both cities recognize at the
outset. It is a tribute to t hair. wis
dom, for every city that has made
noteworthy progress by means of Im
provement campaigns has relied upon
the magio power of publicity.
Kansas City, the alert next- door
neighbor to St. Louis, whose example
of prodigious progress Is at once a
rebuke and a stimulus to St. Louis,
long ago appreciated the value of the
right sort bt advertising. Omaha has
snd Is reaping benefits from It. Both
St. Louis and Baltimore have remark
able resources and advantages to ex
ploit snd should with little difficulty
forge ahead, with the first touch of
this magic power. Commercially they
are well located, 8U Louis particu
larly, with the great growing south
and west from which to draw and. In
turn, to supply. The Missouri me
tropolis, like Maryland's, has made
less progress than it might only be
cause it has failed to take full ad
vantage of natural opportunities.
When Its great wealth and energies
are once pooled In a vigorous, deter
mined campaign of Industrial im
provement, they will, undoubtedly,
produce results revolutionary In
character.
I
Belated and Insincere.
Our amiable democratic contem
porary explodes with a choice lot of
expletives over the election of the
president of the city council, "palpa
bly the result of a deal entered Into
with the republican members by three
democratlo members a good while
ago." The three democrats who have
been In the .combine which has been
running the city council now for two
years come In for a scoring ss traitors
gone back on their party pledges, and
entirely lacking In rood faith.
All this, however, Is belated and in
sincere, because this councllmanlc
combine has from the first been an
open secret and had the sympathy snd
encouragement, and ' frequently the
outspoken approval, ' of the World
Herald. The three democrats it now
denounces represent the element of
local democracy with which that news
paper trains, while the other three
have, been allied with the Dahlman
ltes, whom It has antagonised. When
the same combine made other presi
dents of the council and put men In
the vacancies in the office of city at
torney and city comptroller, over the
protests of the same democratic coun
cllmen whose party' loyalty IS now
praised, it had no objection because
the beneficiaries were democrats. In
throwing such fits on this occasion its
action must be prompted only by re
gret that the combine's choice for
once, is a republican.
An Innovation in Colonels.
Governor Aldrlch of Nebraska is not
the only new chief executive to create
an lnpovatlon respecting his official
staff of colonels. He has not ap
pointed one, taking the view that this
branch of the government is a super
numerary. Governor . Hooper, the
young republican who presides over
the affairs of Tennessee, however, has
not only gathered about him a staff,
but has gone outside of party and
state lines to do so. He hss appointed
democrats as well as republicans and
has named a citizen of Texas as one
of his colonels. He is one of the most
rantankerous democrats in the Lone
Star state, too George M. Bailey of
the Houston Post.
This is an innovation which, a un
doubtedly, will attract attention from
other governors. It is easier to see
why Governor , Hooper, should name
democrats and republicans both to
membership on his staff than to ac
count for . his going outside his state,
for he was elected by democrats and
republicans alike who had determined
to rebuke the old Patterson gang in
the state. But why he should issue
a commission to Jhe Texas editor Is
not so clear, especially since he
boosted for the Paterson crowd and
knocked Hooper. Perhaps the reason
lies in the fact that Bailey is a news
paper man and Governor Hooper ap
preciates the tmpossibilty of ade
quately rewarding members of that
profession this side of heaven. In
the governor's letter of appointment,
however. Is a subtle suggestion that
this office is to placate Bailey, who has
the hsblt of lambasting Tennessee
and South Carolina unmercifully in
his paper and of booming"" everything
In Texas ss the best, even to the
onions and mosqultos and red-haired
widows.
It is to be hoped that the unregen
erate democratlo editor will find time
to mingle with his fellow colonels and
imbibe a little simon-pure republican
ism for his own, if not for their edi
fication and salvation.
In signing the ordinance to regulate
the pool halls Mayor "Jim" explains
that he does not think restaurants
run in connection with them should
have been permitted to keep open
after midnight. Mayor "Jim" proba
bly sees no reason, anyhow, for any
refreshment place to keep open after
8 o clock, when the padlock Is Dut on
the beer pump.
For the next year It will be Judge
Berka's turn as president of the city
council to serve as acting mayor
whenever His Honor leaves the city.
It Is a aafe guess, however, that Mayor
"Jim" will not be away from home
during the next twelve months quite
so much as he was during the last
twelve months.
Nine democratic membera of the
lower house of the Illinois legislature
walked out In disgust when a Lee
O'Neill Browne henchman eulogized
him as a "favorite son of this legisla
ture," but the eulogy will be used by
Browne Just the same for the purpose
it was lutended to serve. 1
According to official campaign fund
exhibits, the vsln effort of the drys
down at Lincoln to hold the ltd on
cost over t,200. while the outlay to
elect a republican mayor was only
about fT50. Either one crowd caught
a bargain or the other wasted a lot of
money. .
"Great fortunes," says President
EllleU of the Northern Pacific, "are
not made by railroads." No, cer
tainly not. That account for Nhe
poverty of James J. Hill. J. P. Mor
gan, the Gould8r the late Mr. Harri
man and others.
snxiua the ltjmbes trust.
Washington Post: Watch the Lumber
trust take to the tall timbers!
New Tork Post: Whether viewed from
a legal or from an economic standpoint,
this government suit has Interest at the
very highest order.
St. Louis Republic: After th start of
that suit, the Lumber trust ought to be
good and stop sicking the farmers onto
the reciprocity agreement.
St. Louis Globe-Democrat: If lumber In
terests are not In monopolistic combinations
there Is not the slightest danger that any
thing unreasonable will happen to them.
Brooklyn Eagle: Just as soon as the
Lumber trust Is dissolved th home build
ing boom will be started to help tha sub
sidiary companies, and th dealers subsidi
ary to them. Dissolutions era costly.
Springfield Republican: This government
prosecution of an alleged combination of
lumber producers and dealers Is calcu
lated at least to lama on of th forces
making powerful opposition to Canadian
reciprocity. It Is to be welcomed for this
if for no other purpose.
Indianapolis News: If the government
succeeds in the present proceeding It will
attack other combinations that control the
marketing of the necessaries of life As
It la largely through such combinations that
the people are oppressed, we shall ail hope
that a way may be found, to limit their
operation.
CRGEXT NEED OP FREER TRADE
Too Maay Combinations Sqneeae the
America Cenaanaer.
Indianapolis News.
W may differ as to tha question of
free trade with foreign nations, but there
can be no doubt of the desirability of a
good deal freer trade among ourselves than
we now enjoy. Oreed has Interposed many
obstacles between the people and their
source of supply. Too many men and or
ganisations take toll of life's necessities
before they reach tha consumer. Con
sumers, not being organised in their ca
pacity as consumers, it If most difficult
for them to protect themselves against
extortion or to maintain their rights.
Therefore, the government- is under, pe
culiar obligation to enforce any laws en
acted for their protection. This, of course.
is th animating purpose of the suit
against th lumber trust. Th govern
ment has bea at work for a year gather
ing evidence, so we auppoe It feels
reasonably aura of Its ground. Thos who
were so fearful that the administration
might "run amuck" in Its fight on trusts,
and so disturb business, -can now feet no
alarm, for have they not been assured
that no combinations would be disturbed
unless they "unreasonably" restrained
trade? These people can have no objection
to th prosecution of trusts that are in
reality trusts under the recent interpreta
tion of the anti-trust taw.
Clever Bit of High Finance.
Pittsburg Dispatch. .
Who says that college men are net prac
tical In business, r Dr. Hollander, professor
of political economy, selected by our gov
ernment to straighten out the finances of
San Domingo, Is said to have taken HO, 000
from the United States for th Job and
without Iettlnrtii right, hand know what
his left was doing to have accepted 1100,
000 from San Domingo. With that Intro
duction, th scholaatlo economist ought to
b eligible for almost any financial task
In Wall street.
JJe f American, Toadies.
Louisville Courier-Journal.
"I am being badgered to death," cries
Ambassador Reld, who has the Job of
selecting th fifteen Americans to b pre
sented at the- ''coronation courts": in Lon
don. Why not solve th problem by selling
th privilege to the highest bidder and use
the proceeds to build adequate American
embassies abroad. Nobody Is being pre
sented anyway who hasn't got great chunks
of money .and they might as well pay as
they go.
Hew Times Have Changed.
Brooklyn Eagle.
Commodore Vanderbllt, were he living
today, would have to get someon to tell
him why railroads should make such
costly effort to explain themselves to the
putmc in advertisements.
People Talked About
J?HfT
In colors bright enough to catch th eye
th printed phis of John Rlngllng, with
those of his brothers, has decorated every
circus billboard In th land. He does not
get all his money from the main tent and
sideshow. When he hankers for real
profitable hauls h builds railroads.
George B. Cox, republican boss of
ilanillton county, Ohio, having obtained a
Judicial vindication, concluded to retire
from politics be for another insurrection
could be launched.
Frederick W. Taylor, th father of scien
tific management. Is engaged In a special
research .for the government . which wUl
determine how Mr. Taylor's Ideas can best
b applied to navy yards and to fleets as
fighting machines.
Harry Sturtevant and Ed and Horatio
Beam of Dover, N. J., are engaged In a law
ult over th ownership of the skin of th
only leopard ever killed li) Ne Jersey.
Th leopard was In a tree and all three
shot at theujame Instant. Each maintains
that h killed It. Th animal had escaped
Irom a circus.
If President Jos de la Crui Porfirlo
Diss retire from office today, as dis
patches promised, he will leave a record
of twenty-six years, five months and
twenty-four days sa chief executive of
Mexico. Ha was SO years of age September
IS last, though he was commonly believed
to be two years older than la officially ad
mitted. Mrs. Herbert L. Cox of . Winchester,
prominent In Boston society. Just has ap
plied for a professional chauffeur's license
Khe has driven her automobile more than
10.0U0 miles. Besides running her car Mrs.
Cox also is capable of making repairs. Tire
troubles caua her little concern, for ahs
can tax off a shoe, put In a new tub and
replace the tire as well as a professional
driver. She began running a machine last
summer.
A W
- ill s
2W .
Around New York
Xtlppl en th Current ef Hf
as aa la th 0ra A marl can v
Metropolis from Say to Pay
An old-fashioned celebration of the
Fourth of July on "safe and sane" lines l
being planned by th authorities of Greater
New Tork. Th city treasury will furnish
th money and a committee Is already ar
ranging a program. Th Crecrarker, th
torpedo, the pistol and other cemetery pro
moters ar to b banished more rigidly this
year than last, and all th fireworks will
be fired under official auspice. During th
day patrlotio exercise will take place in
the larger schools and armories, and ath
let to sports, for prises, will be held In vari
ous publio parks. Mayor Qaynor will pre
side at the meeting In New Tork city halt.
The Declaration of Independence will be
read and speeches delivered by men of
national repute. It I Just 108 years ago
since th first common council sat In city
hall, and attention will be directed to this
anniversary during the exercises, which
will be held on th steps of th hall and
In the council room. In th evening there
will be neighborhood celebrations at every
important center throughout the greater
city, at which there will be bands of music,
singing by German singing societies and
other bodies, fireworks and speeches. This
feature is In charge of a committee of
aldermen. Th program outlined come
within th bounds of patriotism and good
sense, and may be copied with profit by
every community in th land.
For all dogs, especially those of the
wooly or furry varieties, who have to
spend the coming summer In New Tork,
the Blde-a-Wee home has Just Installed a
new comfort parlor.
The feature of the parlor Is a clipping
machine, electrically operated. There are
also some other accessories, such as bath
tubs, medicines, sponges and combs, the
Idea being to take In the hairy dog, shear
him until he Is hairless, medicate him
until his skin Is entirely whole, and bathe
and groom him till the last of tha winter's
dirt has disappeared.
The clipping machine has a capacity of
twenty dogs a day, whll th bath room
will car for about the same number. Th
300 dogs now In the Bide-a-Wee home win
be treated to a summer trimming first,
and then th plant will be open for visitors.
From th count kept at th municipal
lodging houses of th homeless who shelter
there. It Is deducted that vagrants have
doubled In number In New Tork recently.
Last month 18,000 persons were sheltered
there as compared with 7,760 In April, 1910.
This year's figures are five times the
record for April, 1907. Officers of the
charity organisations say that th Increase
Is not confined to the city, but Is notice
able all over the country. "Records show
that the vagrancy evil is assuming alarm
ing proportions," says a statement by
Superintendent Blatchley. "Th only
remedy In sight for this condition is th
establishment of farm colonies Where the
labors of these men may be utilized to
meet the expense of their maintenance."
The "open stair" tenements Just com
pleted In New Tork ar a distinct novelty.
There ar no entrance to th ninety-six
flats In th buildings except from a large
central court, on th sides of which th
open stairways ar built. Entranc to th
court Is through an arched passageway
from the street. This form of construction.
It la claimed, give 13 per oent mora bed
room space than can b had In a flat build
ing which has the customary entrances on
th street" plus a court or alrshafu. Th
open stair tenements have the advantages
also that their entrance and exit ways are
absolutely fireproof, being constructed of
steel and concrete and at all times acces
sible from the building; that each apart
ment I private and that a policeman, pistol
In band, can command every exit door.
Whll th crowd was slowly pushing
along th On Hundred and Sixty-eighth
street subway station ' th other day on
Its .way to a big game a man suddenly
began excitedly feeling his coat front, tha
coats of those near him and looking at
as much of the ground as was visible, mur
muring, That'a very strange! I had them
on my nose a minute ago very strange!".
A while later when progress had been
gradually mad to the elevator a girl was
punctuating her conversation with em
phatic nods and thereby tickling the face
of a man In th back of her with her
gracefully angled plumes when he touched
her upon the shoulder. "Pardon me," said
he, "but do you know that you have a
pair of eyeglasses in your feathers?" It
took about a minute to notify the eyeless
man of the discovery.
"W must wag this battle until w get
our oppressor, mart, reduced to the happy
condition of the emu family," said the
suffragette orator to her women auditors,
as reported by the Sun.
"When the lady emu decides that it la
tlm to .raise a family she sounds a call
like blowing Into th bunghol of a barrel.
Mr. Emu comes and scrapes a hoi In th
ground and by and by there are a dozen
egg there'. Th tnal sits on those eggs,
hatches 'em out after eight weeks and
then takes car of the youngsters until the
next hatching season, when they go to the
mother. Now that Is equal labor and equal
responsibility j and It la what w women
ar entitled to."
"Good! Good!" shouted th auditors.
I th Millennium CaualaajT
Baltimore American.
The supreme court has decided that it
Is the imperative duty of railroads to keep
safety appliance in repair. It must be
real repair, too, and not what la technically
knownti "reasonable diligence." And In
facjtof the fast-coming decisions in lt4
favor, the poor, dear public is daxedly
wondering whether tha millennium Is really
coming to pasa.
BACK TO NATITRE.
Washing ion Star.
I long for life, for the real thing.
Not the dawdling of dreamy days.
Nor the kind that the raw-hide poets sing
In carefully roughened phrase.
I auk for no glimpse of the timid deer
That flees from the hunter's call.
Let nie go out there With the crowds that
cheer -She
bunch that Is playing ball.
Back to the primal state where man
la close to old nature o heart,
Where we're all on the plan where we
once began.
1'npollahed by time and art;
Where the spirit of context surge fast
And the chanoea that may befall
Are eagerly walled from fust to latt
Wher th bunch is pluying ball!
Let the dreamer go out 'neath the star so
bright
And defy the lightning' plav.
The atara sre where they belong, all right.
And the lightning is miles away.
And the umamed ben at will be on th run
If he hear your footateps fnll.
The placid wild wood I fain would shun
The signal I hear, "I'lsy ball!"
Let me hark to the shout and th battle
cry
A the foe Is put to rout;
Let ma dodge the inisnllea that swiftly fly
When the umpire aavs "You're out!"
Let me lift may voice with the general
throng.
Prince and groundling and all.
Where nature la unreatrained and strong.
Out there wher the bunch piays ball.
Sixty Years
'" av S I" 1 "w y" f r 1 "fl jfm
C R e:
ill
It makes home baking easy
and gives nicer, better and
cleaner food than the "ready
made." There Is no baking
powder or preparation like It
or equal to It for quickly and
perfectly making the delicate
hoi biscuit, hot bread. mulUn,
'cake and pastry
No Alum No Lime Phosphates
tssssasBsxasi seas stss
-"Altim In baking powder fs dan
gerous and should be prohibited.
Prof, Schweitzer, State Univ., Mo.
LAUGHING LKES.
Gurgled th soulful girl: "O. how Khali
I write the words that put my senses In
a whirl when I think of flowers and
btrds!"
Jabbered her brother P.I1I: "I don't
know. sis. but I think I'd make a pen of a
Jomiull and dip It in bobble ink." Chicago
Tribune.
"Jones has a snarly way about him."
"The way to treat Jones Is to snarl back
at him. It does htm good."
"Does him good?"
"Sure. It makes him feel at home."
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"Where are you going with that goat,
little boyT"
"Down to the lake. Come along If you
wanter see some fun. This here Koat has
Jeat et a crate of sponges, an' I'm Koin'
down an' let him drink." Toledo Blade.
"Say, lies, air you gnln to hev any city
fellers to board this summer?"
"Yep, one feller, but they tell me he's
small persimmons."
"H'm! We're goln. to hev a colleee fel
ler what writes books, but thev sav he I
Jum a common "tater." Baltimore Ameri
can. "Why, you absent minded man! Whv
are you starting out with an umbrella on
such a sunfthlny day?"
' I am bound for the art gallery."
"But you cannot exhibit an umbrella!"
"Of course not. But a notice on the
GORDON. WILL If
His Pension of $10 a Month Assured
Needs-47 More
.s
. Jj jr- . S t
-
DOUGLAS 7163
And Address
2423 So. 24th St., Omaha, Nebraska
the Best Selling
Book in America
As repaead Id "Th. Boofaaaa" by oSa BoobeUew
i iiriMSMSssassHMisMi iiiissiiaiiiiisiiisjasiiaiisaMiissssaxiiiT
"'The Prodigal Judge runs the scale of
human emotions from treble to bass. In
humor, wholesome ; in romance, as delicate
as the odor of mignonette; in action, as tense
as the U string of
grip
By Vaugkan Ktittr. Picture! hy Bracktr. $I.t5 met
4w vSS mBOBBS'MERRlLL(PMPANY Iac.
tha SianCnrd
AM
return
catalogue says that one must leave his
fane or umbrella outslda before he can
enter." Judge.
"What you see In that creature to admlr
I can't see," said Mrs. Duohleigh. "Why,
she all made up. Her hair, her figure,
her complexion every bit of her Is arti
ficial." "Well, what of It?" retorted DuhblelKh.
"If the world admires a self-made mat
why rhouldn't It admire a self-mad
woman? Harper s Weekly.
"Very clever, Isn't he?"
"Yes.
"I'm told that his three older brothers
are mentally weak."
"Tee, he's the original sane fourth."-
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"Thin," said the curator, displaying a
mummy, "was an Egyptian princess."
"Poor thing!" exclaimed the conversa
tional girl. "Phe Insisted on being burled
In her hobble skirt, didn't sh.e?" HouBtort
post.
) I may nofc
hunband hafS
Mrs. Younswedd (boaatlngly)-
be much of a rook, but my hunba
never yet twitted mo about the better cK"
and plee his mother used to maxe.
Mrs. Kerne-No. dear: his father use t
run a bakery. Boston Transcript.
"This is a very fine dog, ma i
cheap at th price,' said tne aeaier. a-
"I've no doubt of it," she replied; "but r"a -I
don't care to buy him until Ira sura Sr 1
ne maicnea my now - .
John Gordon Is making a
fight for tio a month pension
for himself and to secure 12,000
mora for some charltabl or-
T animation. Last year he won
1.000 for the Child Having
Institute, getting aubscrip
. tlons for magazines, and th
expense Involved deprived
nun practically of all benefits
to himself. In the fail he
made a contract to get (00
subscription every month
1 1 jiii Oct. 1 to May JO, for the
Ladies' Home Journal and the
(Saturday livening Post, and
If he Bucrteils the company
will deposit $2,000 with th
Conservative having and
Loan Association. Ha will
never see the money, but h
will get the proceeds from it,
whlt'h will amount to $10 a
month for life. On hi deatli
th money will go to what
ever charity orranlxatlon hla
subscribers desire. eio far
Mr. Gordon haa kept up with
the contract. But he needs 4 7
more by May 30 to earn the
full $3,000 and Insure his pen
sion. He needs your order,
now. His telephone Is
el th V. S. lot th mooth nxaa April I t May I
a banjo. The story
New York Commercial
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t
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