THE BEE: OMAHA. TUESDAY. MAY 9, 1911.
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Serious History in Comic Vein
General Putnam's
Front Stairs.
"Yes." said Bhow-Me Ptnlth, as he pro
ceeded to a'fmh deal of the Tilstory cards.
"Ive be-n;up to four. Central Fark brMle
path anil A' few ridln"--wchoola to see If the
east naa. learned to sit on a home yet.
but I'm sorry to Bay the hasn't. Reminds
me of a pigeon toed Irian tryilng to cross
a cobble paved street on roller skates.
Out west wi wouldn't call that a bridle
path, 'tidoks there like' a tea tahlo. Every
body trying to pour' tea with both hands.
"Near as -1 , tan eeuoljeoi, the last man
In the, east that knew hew to ride was
old man.-Israel I'litiium. Remember Is?
The man the eong eutd ,.'.-..
V 'Call oped Aon'a: hundj-ed stairs
And left ten), In the lurch, sirs."
"Well,, old, -'Oaneral. ",tutnam was the
Champion steeplechaser of hbt day and
time, and that stunt of his was the first
Joy ride' In American history. The German
Emp'roj" is some strong; on horseback
rldln' anl the say his men can take a
hurdle ever a dinner table on a ballroom
floor, , but they never tried the grand
tatrcass trick "VeL-"
I was personally acquainted with p.
horse In Chicago, one -that ambled up
ptalrs to the second floor, but they had to
lise a derrick to get him -down. No der
rick for ptd Jut thun. '. .
"They've, always sot the. circumstances
of that joy rtde of his all wrong.- Tou see,
the old Gene'ral was out In the field
Jplayln' golf one day. He waa very strong
en golf. "That the reason they called him
Did Put '
"Well, Old Put was out putterln' with a
putter when an Ennli.-hman with a glass
eye leans over the fence and says:
' 'I Pay, me good man, have Sou got a
mldlron?'
" 'No,' says Israel, but I got a shootln'
Iron handy, and the next Britisher that
comes trampln' over my bunkers and
dlKRln' .. up the turf Is' gotn' to get It.
Comln" In?"
" 'Oh, no thanks awfully,' says the
British golfist. droppln' down behind the
fence. - .
"General Putnam holed out In seven and
started to finish up a little spring plow
ing he had on hand, when a couple of
neighbors yelled over the fence that the
glass tyed Hrltisher was climbing over his
bunkers amain. That settled It. Old Put
didn't wait a second, but unhitched his
plow horse, threw up a leg and was off.
"The Englishman saw him comln' and
took to the pikt on a dead run, not know
ing the pike led .straight to old man Put
nam's hundred foot fair steps, which was
the only way out. He made a dash for
the top of the steps but banged Into a sign
that read:
"'The moving stairway . has stopped!"
he groaned. All Is lost!''
"The stairs didn't bother the general,
though. He was so set on getting his man
that he dug In his spurs and clattered
down the whole hundred to the bottom."
"But what of the British person?" I
asked.
"Slid down the bannisters and beat the
peneral by a nose," said Bhow-Me.
(Copyright, 1911, by the N. Y. Herald Co.)
Tabloid' History of the Presidents
( Twelfth In the list of United States presl
Irttnte starts Zachary Taylor of Virginia.
.'Sfho wasborn Beptember 24, 1781, and died
In the White, House on" July 9, 1860. He was
the third o of jColonel Richard Taylor,
!Who fought In the -revolution and In 1TS5
Removed to Kentucky, which was then a
fchlnly settled county ..of Virginia.
From ' "early manhood Taylor served In
H.he ITnited States' army,' first aa an Indian
tighter and afterward In the war with
'ptfexlco, where he made a brilliant record
i.ftTy hie victory 'at Buena Vista, where he
(.vas attacked by General Santa,, Ana with
l force .he'arlf' fnir times 'ris large as his
own. '. After a qonfllct . which lasted from
morning tilf night the'Mexkans Jiad been
driven' fronj'.'thVfleld on -February Z3. 1M7.
After, the war.., GeneraJ Taylor had no
Political - aspirations,,, but . .retired to his
tmrm h. ti ui InsDlred nubile confl
uence that, he wan "eagerly sought for the
office of chief executive. "; lie. was lnnaugu.
rated on March 6, 1849. the fourth being
Sunday. ,'' :.' -"
Gold had 'recently,, been'., discovered In
(California, and the news spread so rapidly
'ghat thousands of emigrants from all over
Ithe world ruBhed into the 'new territory.
Bo fast did they arrive that m the autumn
,ef 1849 there wa a autftrjijnt number of
WetHers" lb eenalUuta .,atate Jin4, aa p
gjllcation for. admission was made.-
In the ' mid at, ot the discussion aroused
fcv this movement President Taylor died
inexpectedly, and his Tlace waa -taken by
"the vice president, Millard Filmore.
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Taylor . was a man of great political
purity, patriotism and discretion. On the
day following his death R. O. Wlnthrop,
In a speech delivered In the house of repre
sentatives, said of him: -
"His Indomitable courage, hie. unlmpeach.
able honesty, his spartan simplicity and
sagacity, his frankness, kindness, modera
tion and magnanimity, his fidelity to his
friends, his generosity and humanity for
hta enemies, the purity of his private life,
the patriotism of hie public principles will
nevercease to be cherished In the grate
ful remembrances of all just men and all
true hearted Americans.
(Copyright, 1911. by the N. T. Herald Co.)
:
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This is fhQ
DayWe
Celebrate
The BEES cJum'or Birthday Book
May 9, 1911.
V p
HOWARD DOUGUA8,
4413 LHiuglas street.
Vear.
, 1904
Thieves' "Latin" and Its Meaning
Modenj criminal siang hai
aiess . sad . applicability,' says
w
expressive-1
a writer In
Case and Cotnraen it nas taaen . our
snodern tflvlllsatloa to. make the present
ay criminal . and to.evolve his pcullar
plaleet, " " "
Crooks can cbnveraeat.wlll In the pres
ence 'of the police or can write to each
Vother without .pVlng In the least under
istnod by tha unlnltlft.ted. The average po-
J llceroan Is known to the under world as a
,Tiarness.. bull.'-' and the criminal feels a
jontempt for the ' of fleer1 knowledge. .
Thleiyes froth different parte of the coun
try baya different u ef preeslons, though
fter a "meet'if western, and eastern
thieves en Interchange of slang follows
nd one group readily Picks up the say
ings of the other;- A critical study of this
lana of the criminal world Is Interesting.
Take the pickpocket, who Is called "a
., , u , i Vtl.,e Iia Atun not
fun. a " .. ..w
ise force, which sounda like a paradox,
ut Is nevertheless true. In this way he
Is unlike th "gorll'.a," the strong arm hlgh-
(wayman.. A "grafter" Is a- thief. A com
plaint or charge" ir a "rap" and the com
elalnant is the "rapper." The one whose
property is stolen U the "sucker" and the
udge Is tn "Beak."
A fall" 1s an arrestj "fall money" is
Frhat u? use4 - to liberate a man from cut
ody. To "spring" a man Is to ball him
gmt. And to ,hlp square the "sucker" and
pet a roan off "clear from any charge the
f "underground Wire"' must be used. A
MckUrOc! Ii a' "poke" and the man who
pumps Ms ball, becoming a fugitive from
fustics, la a "lamaster.". . ,
I Tile thieft who steals your rocketbeek Is
She "wire" or1 "tool," and the gang of three
gr more pickpockets who travel together Is
palled ruobv" A.well mob" la a gang
khat -earn Mr- first-class legal talent and
ftiav good financial backing. When a man
is convicted of crime he Is "settled," or, to
aie the English phrase, "unfortunate."
' A "swell mouthpiece" Is a very good
lawyer,-while a vwV bad one Is called a
"shyster." A pickpocket Is frequently
called a "dip," and in western states a
"cannon."
A shoplifter 'is called a "booster", br
"holster" or "hyster," and an exception
ally smart one a swell booster." Store
thieves who steal Jewelry are called "penny
welghters," while thieves who tap store
tills are called "damp getters.".'
Thieves who steal diamonds or othe.r pre
cious stones from the person are called
"prop getters" or "stone getters." A
woman thief Is called a "gun moll,", and a
thief who makes a specialty of robbing
women Is called a "moll busier.". A safe
blower is called a "gopher man," "peter
man" or "yeggman." A . second-story
worker who breaks and enters 'dwelling
houses Is called a "houseman," "porch
climber" and "flat worker."
A prison turnkey Is alluded to as a
"screw" and prison food Is called "steamed
grub." "Mugged" Is photographed and
"stood up" Is to be placed In the line at
police headquarters for Identification and
exposed to the gaze of probable "rappers."
An "Irish clubhouse" Is the police station,
and an "Ink pot" Is a resort for low char
acters. '
A "thimble" and "turnip' Is a watch and
counterfeit money la "bad dough." Dia
monds with flaws are called "bum rocks,"
and a "fixer" Is a man who looks after the
Interests of the man who Is arrested,
squares the "sucker," hires the lawyer and
attends to all necessary details.
Loretta's Looking Glass-Held Up to Girl With Many Admirers
Name and Address. School.
Donald Aabel, 4105 North Seventeenth 8t Saratoga
Delbert Albrecht, 1805 Spring St Vinton ..1904
Rosaline Altnian, 2201 Farnam St Central .1905
Howard Mettlnser, 1322 South Twenty-eighth St.... High 1894
Eleanor BuRtell. 320 North Nineteenth St Central 1898
Rena M. burton, Thirty-fifth and Brown fits. ..,"... .Monmouth. Park... 1902
John G. Battelle, 1312 South Thirty-third St. ...... Park 1901
William A. BJortnson, 3816 Martha St Windsor 1904
Gladys Barlow. 939 North Twenty-sixth St Long ........... ,1901
Mao La Chapelle. 2711 South Fourteenth St Castellar 1895
Sheldon Colgrove, 1609 Leavenworth St Leavenworth 1900
Howard N. Douglas. 4412 Douglas St Saunders 1897
Mary Davis, 2247ft Pierce St Mason 190o
LUate Divine, 2714 Yates St Sapred Heart 1905
Vera Darby, 427 North Forty-first St Saunders ...... 1. 1897
Frank Lthofer. 1523 Canton St Edward Rosewater.1904
Howard W. Farrell, 3316 Ruggles St .Howard Kennedy. . 1904
Henry Fehrs. 4544 Seward St Walnut Hill 1900
Emil Fryzak, 1408 Dorcas St Comenius 1899
James Gross, 2412 South Forty-first St Beals 1902
Ralph Gates, 3120 Maple St Howard Kennedy. . 1902
Arthur Grabe, 2420 South Fifteenth St Castellar 1R97
Wilbur Grosjean, 3816 Brown St High 1895
John S. Gideon, jr., 2721 North Tweny-Becond St.. High 1893
(tludys Howe, 2634 Caldwell St Saratoga 1900
Jaineg C. Hodge, 1703 Park Ave Park . . . . , 1898
rrieda E. Johnson, 3924 Arbor St Windsor 1899
David Katlenian. 2560 Cuming 8t Webster V.1904
Leah L. Keith, 302 Douglas Building Cass '. !l898
Hael M. Kernan, 2312 North Twenty-eighth Ave Howard Kennedy.. 1897
Otto Lcnser, 2907 South Twenty-first St Vinton 1903
William Larson, 4308 Emmet St Clifton Hill 1899
Alfred Mlcha, 1459 South Fifteenth St Comenlu 1899
itern Mclnbyre, Albright, Sarpy County St. Joseph 1897
Anna R. Miller, 2622 Camden Ave Miller Park 1904
Ethel Moriarity, 1620 Ohio St Lake jboi
Josephine Nelson, 816 North Forty-first Ave Saunders .....J!!l898
vnicu reLer itMBcii, iiui oouin riity-ursi 01. . . , . . iseals ....1903
Dorothy C. Nielson, 2923 Lake St .Howard Kennedy.! 1905
John H. Petersen, 3011 South Fifteenth St '...German Lutheran.. 18 9Y
Llllie Ross, 2C15 Parker St High .. .1896
Agnes Roman, i2524 South Thirty-seventh St Windsor V.V.V.V..1 90 S
Joseph Roncek, 1471 South Eleventh St Lincoln ......V1904
Lwwrence Ross. 2516 Parker St Long III!l899
Dewey Stoops, 2011 Harney St Central 111898
Ruth Slabaugh, 104 North Fortieth St High ...!.!!"l893
Floyd P. Smith, 1817 Davenport St Central"! 1897
Frederick Siofft, 2810 Ames Ave Saratoga J!!!!!!!l905
Churles Sastovica, 1711 South First St Train .....1902
Fred Samuels. 651 South Twenty-fifth Ave Mason ....1896
Vera Stulik, 1714 South Twenty-sixth St Park 1903
Clifford Schoening, 2632 South Fifteenth St Castellar .1901
Jeanette F. Thompson, 1713 South Seventeenth St.. .Comenius ....... .1898
Homer Tharp, 1710 North Thirty-fourth St Lake 1900
Edua Westerfield, 2812 North Twenty-sixth St Lothrop ...1905
A Hood Reason.
Lulu was watching her mother working
among the flowers. "Mamma. I know why
flowers grow," she said; "they want to
get out of the dirt." Lipplncott's.
When you're feeling sort of tired
And you don't know what to do,.
Kind of feel you need the doctor,
Kind yourself becoming blue.
Oet to think you must be ailing.
Can't enjoy your special dish.
Droy your work and take-to loafing '
Go away somewhere and fish'.-rNew York
Telegram.
If I can manage to squeeze through the
crush I mean to find out how you do It.
Qet all these men dancing attendance
upon you, I mean. Of course, being a
woman, 1 make the mistake of looking at
your clotnes first. They are ball-roomlsh,
with' a little exaggeration that speaks
more for your devotion to fashion maga
zines than to Ibsen and the other learned
contributors to the modern woman's trou
bles. The heels on your slippers are half
an Inch higher than a normal French
stilt. The width of your skirt Is economi
cal. And your hair Is dressed a la mode,
with a hint of marachlno to accentuate
Its color. You are decidedly up to date. -
And the sensibly dressed girl sitting
against the wall thinks all the men are
folllsh files attracted by a silly girl In
sillier clothes. That matron alongside of
the wall-nestling girl sees her husband
fluttering on the fringe of your admiring
court with a disgusted feeling. "Men all
like female fools" would express the senti
ments of the two.
I wonder If they do? Do they really
care for a girl because she dresses in the
extreme of fashion? Po they really enjoy
being cajoled and hoodwinked by a shal
low little minx In a hobble-skirt?
I am creeping closer to you to find out
whether It is not a mistake to attribute
your attractiveness to your clothes. Some
how I cannot be content to class all these
creatures that women have mothered as
fools.
You are very bright. Not with biting
sarcastlo wit, nor' with literary distinction,
rbut Just gay, cordial, winning. You are a
Jolly playmate. Ah, that gives me an
Ideal! A ball Is a play place. When men
are amiable enough to be dragged there
they are naturally inclined to make the
best of a boresome experience. They seek
you. When they come of their own ac
cord, it ts because they have a hanker
ing for fun. And, of course, you look as
If you liked It, too. You are distinctly a
ball girl. , Your play mood IS your best
mood. 60 you get the men. ' v
Can you keep them? That, Is another
story. But the question Illustrates a pe
culiarity In woman's makeup. It reveals
that each woman aspires to.be ALL. A
wife envies the girl who appeals to her
husband's frivolous mood. She thinks he
thinks more of her than of the woman
who shares his serious alms. She would
be frivolous, toot. Ilut she woujd not want
to give up her being his helpmeet and
companion in more serious matters. She
forgets that jou, with your pleasant folly,
could not attract the deeper. Interest of a
husband. She even acknowledges you as a
rival.
I think you pay pretty dearly for your
Hpectcular triumph under the glare of the
balloroom lights. You are the girl who
shares' men's light moods and are apt to
receive a like treatment when they are
tired of fun. If only wlverand the serious
girls might . recognize that they are the
telephones which connect with real val
ues, with permanent things, and not let
ithe fear of the' play-girl torture them Into
suspecting and criticising.
You can make a heap of trouble. Miss
Play-girl; but only about one-third of It
would ever really happen If the more ser
ious women would put a bit of backbone
into their courage and refuse to be wor
ried 'by you.
Odd Color Combination s for the Season
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How to" Treat a Husband
j
"We hear a lot of groaning and gnashing
of husbandly teeth these - days over the
lack of domesticity In the modern woman,"
remarked the Wise Wife., "They say we
devote too much attention to current events
and not enough to' the events within the
home, and that twelve hours of hard labor
of the old fashioned sort Is better for'our
domestlo development than five hours with
the modem labor saving devices. Can you
best that for Jealousy?
"If the truth were told J they are only
afraid that old tradition about the lords
of creation will be exploded once we are
not tied to the house from, 4 o'clock In the
morning until 7 at night These days we
have time to brush the cobwebs off our
brain, to read the daily papers and to be
come acquainted with the magazines and
periodicals. We learn a few things.
"But Just because we dou t happen to be
doing housework does not mean we are
apart from the home Interests. Rather are
we placing the home on higher basis by
', y'Y. vV;
' Apparently unattaioatlo
' J
Things are MOtttiaaea
S"MH4 ST r
Very.eaiy--
1
t
To cqlrev
Introducing an atmosphere which wilt keep
the inlereut centered at home. The ex
perlence of having a house all my own to
do with as I pleased was so hovel and car
rled with It such a weight of responsibility
that I couldn't bear to leave it, even to
go to the theater. .
"The habit of staying at home grew upon
me until going down town to buy a new
gown became a burden. And as for social
affairs, I never attended them. One day
Bob Insisted that I accept an Invitation to
dinner with some friends. I shall never for
get the embarrassment of that dinner.
might have come from another world, so
lost waa I to the conversation. I sat there
In dazed silence while they discussed the
newest books, the latest play and a half
dozen topics of the hour. The rest of the
women seemed to know all about them, as
much or more than their )Hisbands. And
I noticed Bob's eyes flash with admiration
at the brilliant sallies of one woman who
seemed to have the situations thoroughly
in hand.
"The next day 1 went down to the book
shop, bought a half dozsn magazines, hunted
up the papers aa far back as I could and
sat down to burnish up my stock of Infor
roation. There wasn't any pie for dinner
that night, but when I asked Bob If he
thought the article in a current magazine
about transportation aeroplanes was practl
cal Bob adores aeroplanes and reads
everything published about themhe looked
Stunned and settled down to a half hour
of the best real conversation we had en
Joyed in weeks.
"There are no candles to mould today
no wool to spin, no soap to make, but the
man who pines for old days Is pretty sure
to chst with ths entertaining woman, en
joy the chat and do his pining afterward.
The successful wife of today knows a
thing or two and mixes a goodly portion
of intellect with her canned fruits and
table linen."
NEW YORK, May 8. Touches of color
contrast noticeable In every style of dress
this season. Even street and traveling cos
tumes, which Dime Fashion demands
shall be somber in hue, show a note or
vivid tone In the rever of the Jacket, In
the little collar about the base of the
fraetlea Peg.
I'm 'fraid that I might starve some day;
.The price of foods so high.
Meat, fish, and soap, and veg'tables.
Are very dear, so I
Am going out in the grsden,"
Kmlles practical Miss Peg.
"To plnt this Ail tie egg plant 101
1 11 alwas Ixave sn egg."
Margaret Q. Hayes In Lipplncott's.
. mm
high collar band on the bodice. In the
hat. or. If nowhere else, then In the crlm
son or grass green parasol and leather
wrist bag. As ths season advances lighter
colors make their appearance among tin
street dresses for town wear, but the
popularity of the dark gown so much
In evidence during the last winter has held
over, and is likely to remain a feature of
the fashions for some time to come. It Is
so essentially a practical fashion to don
dark and Inconspicuous colors for prac
tical wear, and to reserve the pale, perish
able tunes for house and evening use, and,
of course, for warm weather out of town.
Even frocks of palest tones, however, carry
out the desire for sharp contrast; In fact,
often depend upon the foreign note to give
character to' the costume.
On a gown of shell-pink voile, a girdle
of four-Inch wide Nattier blue belting was
singularly attractive, while a belt of
sapphire blue on a gown of salmon pink
Is not Infrequently seen. Cerise In com
bination with violet and purple has long
been a favorite combination of curiously
foreign shades. Apricot with dark blue.
and again the favorite shade of the sea
son, a deep-pink scarlet is combined with
most artistic effect with any number of
shades. Most of these combinations would
at one time have been looked upon with
horror by the woman of conservative taste,
who always Insisted upon matching the
straw of her bonnet to the exact tone of
white at the throat as more than enough
contrast to a gown of dun gray or mole
color.
The bat is still depended upon to give
chsracter to most gowns, and this year
ribbon la the popular trimming for all'
styles of bonnet, and In saUn and strlDed
taffeta and the fancy velvet ribbons beau
tiful colors are to be obtained, which at
small cost make a delightfully smart hat.
especially wlin all simple styles of dres
ribbon-trimmed hats are now In the ma-
Jorlty, while ostrich plumes for tailored
suit or shirt-waist gowns axe as com
pletely out of date as a train skirt for the
morning.
A fetching little frock for afternoon wear
Is shown In the Illustration. The tunic
and over-blouse were fashioned of red and
white foulard trimmed with a lace banding.
The foundation skirt waa of black satin
and the gulmpe of allover lace, which
matched the banding.
The season is here again for a foulard
shirt-waist frock. In this sUk-strlpfcd pat
terns predominate, but there are some
few dotted patterns which are In vogue.
Dice-shaped dots ranged in straight rows
giving a line effect are a relief after the
multitudes of striped fabrics. Figured
foulards in curious Chinese and Japanes
patterns, In which at one time foulard
waa so familiar, have but a small spac
alloted them on the counters where these
silks are sold now daily in hundreds of
dress lengths.
It's a toss-up between having a dress
maker In the hou.e and having house
cleaning going on, but when he UUnks oi
the bills the man of the house will forget
how be dislikes housecleanlng.
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