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MARCH CIRCULATION.
48,017
State of Nebraska, County ot Douglaa, ss:
Dwlght Williams, circulation manager of
The iiee Puhlltthlng Company, being duly
worn, aaya that the average dally circu
lation, leaa ipolled, unused and returned
copies, fur tha month of March, 1911, wii
18,017. DW1GHT WILLIAMS, '
Circulation Manager,
dubscrihed In my pretence and sworn to
before ma this 81st day of March, 1911.
tbaal.) huDLKT HCNTER,
Notary Publio,
Sabecrlbera leaving the city tern
porarlly ahonld have The Bee
ualled to them. Alireu will be
changed aa oftea aa reqaeatel.
Still there are shirts that
either hobble or harem.
beat
Kansas City has a hotel where
there Is not a bellboy. It Is the Girls'
hotel.
The weather man Is entitled to an
annual base ball pass without even
asking for it.
The government's order for the
shipment of GOO coffins to Texas looks
like a concession.
If "Bill" Stone is aching for a fight
with those Mexicans let him slip on
his gum shoes and go to it.
Of course, neither Canada nor the
United States is promoting reciprocity
with the idea of getting the worst of
the deal.
The Commoner recently had an
article on the "Passing of Plutocracy."
Fortunate Mr. Bryan got In on it be
fore It passed.
I
There are boy scouts and girl scouts
and Just scouts, but the greatest
scout of them all just now is the
base ball scout. -
I
Mr. Bryan's Commoner says the
editor of the Richmond Dispatch is a
tool of the Interests. Hammer or
monkey wrench?
An unsophisticated man might
never suspect that there was a particle
of politics In the democrats' attitude
toward reciprocity.
The democratic house has now de
cided to investigate the army. What
if In the search it should find the muz
ale of a gun or two?
Those recipients of threatening let
ters should not be unduly alarmed.
Even ordinary mortals like usedltors
get them every little while.
The archeologlst who has discov
ered that the Sphinx is a man and not
a woman has found out nothing new.
There never was a feminine sphinx.
Oovernor Had ley has paragraphed
it to say, "It is more desirable to be
right than president." But what a
bully thing to be right and president.
I
Sometimes It seems as if those Har
vard professors try to see Just how
brave they can be. Here Is one de
claring that women are nearer savage
than men.
The Indiana man who says clothes
are an evidence of Insanity probably
ould admit that all the citizens of
the FIJI islands were highly Intellec
tual gentlemen. -
Some of the republican newspapers
In Missouri were so elated at 'the
thought of a Mlsaourian being elected
speaker that they forgot and threw
bouquets at Champ Clark.
Unwilling boarders at the city Jail
may now confidently approach Mayor
"Jim" for a ticket of leave by assur
ing "bis honor" that pounding rock
would overtax their strength.
"Prospects of "New Depot Cheer
Clty."Headllna in St. Paul Pioneer
Press. They will also cheer the trav
eling public, or that portion of It that
baa had occasion to use the present
structure.
According to official reports, 2,317
more single than married men were
arrested In Milwaukee last year.
Showing that men with wives to look
after them generally keep out of
trouble more.
The new president of the Equitable
Life Assurance society is to get a
salary of only $50,000 a year, as com
pared with the 180.000 salary paid to
the late Paul Morton, his predecessor.
Wonder if the difference measures the
market value of Nebraska education
and training.
Repress Impulsive Patriotism.
Senator Stone of Missouri, t he had
his way, would by now have the
I'nited States plunged Into war with
Mexico. That might be one way of
reuniting the Mexican factional
forces, but reunion by such means Is
not what we want. It is all very
gratifying to find the actual demo
cratic leader of the senate applauding
the republican president for what he
has thus far done on the border, and
even his sentiment in wishing to give
the president carte blanche In proceed
ing with the situation, is very pleas
ing, but there ends all satisfaction
with Senator Stone's impulsive patri
otism. In fact, his utterances, and
even his language, beyond that point
provoke the Impatience of some of the
strong conservatives of the senate on
both sides, republican and democratic.
Senators Root and Bacon go so far as
to declare that Senator Stone's pro
posal to empower the president to use
the army as he may see fit on the bor
der is, in itself, a declaration of war
and not to be tolerated.
This is no time for violent speech
or careless action at Washington, and
there is little likelihood that this gov
ernment will be easily misled by either
into a false position on the Mexican
affair. There Is every reason to be
lieve that peaceful measures will meet
all our demands and it would be evi
dence of a decided weakness on our
part to employ force before there was
occasion for it. Mexico is not so
wrought up over Its own trouble that
it wants to borrow new and more seri
ous trouble from us. That is made
very plain by the prompt revision and
moderation of the De la Barra note
in reply to the State department's de
mand for assurance that there shall
be no more careless firing across our
boundary line.
Lorimer Case in Other States.
The Lorimer case is being made an
issue In the senatorial fight in Ken
tucky, where Congressman Ollle
James is aspiring to the seat now held
by Senator Paynter, one of the cham
pions of Lorimer In the recent contest.
It has likewise been carried into New
Hampshire, whose senators also stood
by Lorimer. This is not at all sur
prising, and if it enters Into local
fights in other states it will be but a
natural consequence, for 'politically It
offers too good an opportunity to be
ignored.
But in southern states whose sena
tors stood with Lorimer the issue is
peculiarly prolific of campaign thun
der, for in addition to the odium at
tached to the election of Lorimer to
the senate, he was one of the sup
porters of the so-called "force" bill,
which aimed at a fair ballot in the
south by enfranchising the colored
man. But this, of course, is not the
way Ollie Janes and other southern
democrats put It, as Is shown from
this statement by the Kentuckian in a
recent campaign speech at Lexington:
Lorimer, the "blonde boss" from Chicago,
Is the man who voted for the force bill to
reduce southern' representation, to place
back upon the w(hlte people of the south
the black rule of negro domination and h
voted to unseat democrats who were elected
by the voice of the people from southern
states.
Mr. James Is shrewd and not riven
to overlooking bets of this kind. It
requires only a knowledge of the facts
and conditions to appreciate the
weight of such an argument as this
down south. The fact that a south
ern senator voted to retain In bis seat
a northern senator with a clouded
title will not carry near the influence
with the hoi pollol as will the fact that
a southern senator voted for a north
ern senator who voted for the "force"
bill. If Senator Paynter succeeds
against Ollle James be at least baa a
fight on his hands that will make blm
a very busy man between this and the
meeting of the legislature in 1913,
which wjll arrange for the succession.
Advertising- in Esperanto.
The Los Angeles Chamber of Com
merce has commissioned a representa
tive to go to Europe and advertise the
city In Esperanto the universal lan
guage to-be. Are the city'a virtues
so fine that they must be told only in
this tongue, or is it that they have
been preached in every other form of
speech until there Is nothing more to
be said? In answer to all questions
Los Angeles simply says that, though
people in this country may not realize
it, 2,000,000 persons are today talking
in Esperanto, and that this is the lan
guage which one day will be universal.
That commercial travelers have tired
of hooking their tongues around new
idioms and accents of speech every
time they cross a new boundary line
and have learned Esperanto, by means
of which they are exploiting their
goods abroad.
Just how and where this fits the
Los Angeles case Is a little dlfflcs.lt to
see, but it rnust fit somewhere. Of
course, it would never do to preach
the gospel of a live city in a dead lan
guage, hence Sanskrit, Greek or Latin
would never do, to say nothing of the
more archaic forms. Only in the
terms of twentieth century eloquence
can the virtues of the new west be ex
tolled. We have not the least doubt that
Los Angeles will get the advertising
out of It which it seeks Indeed we
are throwing this in for good measure
but It would do well to accompany
the official spokesman with .enough
Interpreters to, talk to as many dif
ferent countrymen aa he happens to
meet, in rase he fails to find the Es
perantists sufficiently grouped ' to
gether to make good sited audiences.
But California Is a gay stste. Its
people enjoy a good stroke of enter
prise especially when in this event.
it is costing them nothing. The
lecturer Is a man of means and loves
travel and all he asks from Los
Angeles is to be commissioned as its J
commercial representative. He pays
his own expenses. There is no ques
tion, of course, as to the city's faith
in the serious results of the enterprise.
Municipal Square Dealing.
Omsha seems destined to have its
hsnds full for a little while with Its
various so-called franchlsed or public
utility corporations. The "Immediate
and compulsory" purchase of the
water works has been in process for
eight years; a controversy with the
gas company over street lighting has
been dragging in and out of the courts
for three years and the electric light
ing company, whose franchise has col
lided with a court decision, is prepar
ing to seek a new bill of rights. This
enumeration will not be complete
without reference to the Independent
Telephone company, which Is In the
hands of a receiver and defaulted on
its taxes and royalties, and bound to
ask for readjustment before long. If
there is any city in the country of
Omaha's size which has more public
service problems on Its hands at one
and the some time than has Omaha it
has not disclosed its Identity.
The question that propounds Itself
Is, Will Omaha, facing the expensive
bungles of Its Water board, profit by
its own sad experience, or will it con
tinue to grapple with these Important
problems in reckless disregard of cost
and consequences? The one thing
where Omaha has suffered most in its
negotiations with the water company
has been in the loss of reputation for
fair and square dealing. The Water
board undertook to take advantage of
every agreement for the benefit of the
city and to repudiate every contract
obligation which seemed onerous or
distasteful. As a result Omaha has
been put in the repudiation class by
many investors and capitalists and
Omaha's agreements have come to
pass current only when reinforced by
Judicial decree.
Our people ought to know that a
city's credit and standing, like that of
a business house or individual, de
pends upon keeping faith In every bar
gain entered into without fraud, and
that a city whose agreements are dis
trusted, like a man with impaired
credit, suffers as a bad risk. The Bee
is not here offering any solution of
the franchise troubles impending ex
cept this, that if the city wants to deal
with its public service corporations It
should deal with them open and above
board; it should live up in good faith
to all Its past obligation.
reasonable and compensatory terms
for new favors and proceed -on the
theory that a contract is binding on
both sides, and not to be repudiated
or evaded by trickery or skullduggery
by either of them.
Flying Season Opens.
Boston makes another claim to dis
tinction as the center of higher educa
tion by founding a school of aviation.
Its newspapers announce that "Flying
school opens in May," and "The flying
season In New England will soon be
upon us." Fourteen students are to
take the entrance exams, but how
many will matriculate is doubtful, for
the faculty declares that temperamen
tal fitness for piloting an aeroplane in
the air must first be determined. Evi
dently the Institution is co-educational,
for no statement to the con
trary Is given out. This will scarcely
meet the approbation of some folks,
who think that woman is not even
temperamentally qualified for auto
lng, let alone aviating. But there is
a difference in the danger, of course,
that of aviation Involving only the
flyer, herself, while that of automobll
ing hazards the safety of pedestrians
and persons la other vehicles.
Such nonchalance about a thing of
this sort would, only a few years ago,
have been regarded as the wanderings
of a deranged mind, and yet these
"professors" discuss the details of
their science with as much abandon
as a tutor in Latin would talk of a
simple construction in Caesar or scan
ning Virgil. Nor is this Boston school
the first of the kind, not even the sec
ond. Atlanta, Oa has one which is
the alma mater of the founder of Bos
ton's college. One scarcely realizes
with what celerity modern progress is
pushing along. One mllepost Is
hardly reached until another looms
up. Only a scant interval elapses be
tween the automobile, prodigious as it
seemed, and the airship.
But now it is time to pause, for,
with all the spectacular demonstra
tions made by the airman and they
have been made at fearful cost to
human life the science of aerial nav.
igatlon is nowhere near a practical
stage. These thrifty Atnerlcan money
makers may go ahead with their little
schools, teaching people the rudiments
in scaling the air, but that Is very
different and very far from reducing
aviation to anything resembling prac
tical utility. Nature, after all, Is
slow to yield her inner secrets and it
probably will be a long time before
the theories taught in these "practi
cal" schools of aviation will become
methods of practical use.
The three democratic house mem
bers of the Nebraska delegation at
Washington have been rudely awak
ened to the fact that their share of the
patronage has suffered terrible shrink
age over what it was supposed to be,
Ih that all their hungry democratic
constituents cannot possibly be satls
fied with the crusts they have to
throw. In a word, Nebraska's demo
cratic congressmen are discovering
that p'e-cuttlng is not what it Is
cracked up to be, and besides that,
the filling of every Job Is calculated
to make at least a dozen enemies and
one Ingrate.
According to reports from the scat
of war, Senator Norrls Brown is
grestly perturbed for fear the little
controversy between the regulars and
Insurgents may keep him out of the
chairmanship of the committee on ter
ritories. That would, Indeed, be a
terrible calamity to his Nebraska con
stituency, which we all hope and pray
may be successfully averted.
Another reason why members of
the late legislature are so unanimous
for the constitutional amendment
cutting the time for introducing bills
down from forty days to twenty days
may possibly be found In the fact that
In the next sentence the amendment
raises the pay of our law-makers
from $300 per session to $600.
A Kansas paper asks: "What has
become of the old-fashioned man, who
used to tweak ' the little . fellow's
proboscis, show the ball of his thumb
between two fingers and say, "There,
sonny, I've got your nose?" " He has
probably had "his block knocked off by
"sonny."
Down at Lincoln an enterprising
contemporary Is holding the city elec
tion in advance by postal card ballot.
The candidates for the various mu
nicipal offices, however, will watt for
certificates of election duly Issued ac
cording to the official canvass.
The conversion of state banks Into
national banks as a consequence of
Nebraska's guaranty law goes steadily
on. But the predicted rush to take
out charters for new state banks is
not visible to the naked eye.
Smiles Behind the Kick.
New York World.
In spite of the danger from bullets cross
ing the Mexican boundary, Douglas, Arts.,
seems to have enjoyed the show.
An Opening; for the Recall.
Brooklyn Eairle.
An Ohio lawyer who was disbarred for
contempt in campaign speeches telling
wnat he thought of a Judge who waa run
nlng for re-election has been reinstated
by the legislature. A divorce of noil Mr.
and the judiciary In that state would leave
each to a state of single blesaedneaa much
to be coveted.
Insurgent Insincerity.
New York Tribune.
Most of the republicans Insurgents In
congress who are opposing: the Canadian
reciprocity bill maintain that they want to
see me scope of that bill extended hv in
corporatlng Into It the provisions of the
larmers rree Jlat bill. But they are work
ing for such an Incorporation aa will bin
both bills, which would Drnhahlv ni th.i.
real purposes much better than the passage
ui euner.
Woman Deplorable Polnta.
Baltimore American.
A railroad gateman In Omaha hud hi.
ey torn Out by a women's hatpin. Enough
oi sucn aepiorable accidents have resulted
to be a warning against the careless i.
of these sharp points projecting so far
oeyona natnrtms as to be a mennce both
to sight and life. While lauched at nd
generally unsuccessful, the efforts to abate
this danger by legal restrictions are quite
in me public Interest.
Uncle Joc'a Conversion.
Chicago Post.
It mar be true that Uncla J no rann.
has experienced a change of heart, seen
a great white light or gone through the
proper rhetorical figure expressive of con
version from stand-pattlnm to progress.
Certainly the change from the speakership
to the ex-speakership Is conductive to such
alterations and repairs. But Uncle Joe Is
a little harder to convert than the ordinary
run of humanity. He has run along to a
single mold for so many years that he la
pretty well set In it. They say he has
changed utterly In the last month or two.
Why, then, when a new republican con
(Teeman near him voted for Cooper as
minority leader, did your Uncle Joseph
Inquire, sotto voce: "Who on earth Is that
blanked pinhead?''
People Talked About
Frank A. Munsey of New Tork la the
publisher of six magasines and three
dally newspapers located In Philadelphia,
Washington and Baltimore.
Joaeph Severson. mayor of High wood,
111., In a term of two years turned a
deficit of fS.OOO into a surplus of tt.soo. He
was re-elected with a whoop and some
over.
Former Senator Ijife Young says the
remedy for evils In municipal government
Is to "cut out the city hall." It Is under
stood Editor Young spelled "haul," but
the proofreader ruled out the point.
When J. D. Peeples, a druggist of Rose
dale, Kan., learned that he had been nomi
nated for mayor lie declined to accept tha
nomination, giving the excuse that he never
goes out nights and couldn't think of
changing his habits.
A judge In Los Angeles ruled that poker
is not the national game. A Chicago jurist
forced the reinstatement of three bounced
policemen one convicted of murderoua
aaaault, the others for exceaalve habitual
"luahing." People In both cities sob out
loud for a chance to work the "recall."
Mrs. Kllsabeth T. Morrison. 77 years old,
Is said to be one of the earlleat voters at
the polls In all Colorado electiona. She Is
usually accompanied by one of her two
daughters, both of whom are married.
Mrs. Morrison's only iin Is a prominent
lawyer in California anNons of the lead
ers lo that atate for CMual suffrage.
In Other Lands
lde Llghta oa What ia Trans
piring Among the Hear and
rar STatloas of th Sana
Between lono.noo and 6.0e0,non bottles of
high class "conversation water" were de
stroyed In the champajtna war In France.
Multiplying by two the number of bottles
wrecked determines Its money value In
francs at home and In dollars abroad. A
tidy sum wrested sby a thrifty people to
satisfy a grudge against a fortunate few.
What was the trouble aboutT The true
champagns district of France la a limited
area of fertile plain with distinctive geologi
cal characteristics 100 miles eaat of Parts.
Rocky barriers face east and south and on
thene slopes are grown the grapes from
which the famous wine is made. It Is
claimed that true champagne can only be
made from grapes grown In that district.
But the district could not produce all the
wne labeled champagne drunk In the
world. Adjacent vineyards ' produced
"something just as good," something Just
aa sparkling and just as capable of shap
ing "that awful head the morning after."
The difference between the two grades Is
so slight that hardly one In 1.000,000 could
detect the difference. The government
sought to confine the champagne label to
the product of the favored district, the ef.
feet of which was 'depreciation of the
value of the slightly Inferior wine. Mak
ers of the latter protested and charged the
government agents with Importing wine
Into the district and labeling It champagne.
Unable to secure a hearing from the
authorities, the protestants marched Into
the favored district and smashed things.
The rioters' proceeding turned a searchlight
on a carefully devised plan to create ,a
champagne monopoly under the shelter of
law.
Another ruction Is on In Morocco. It
has three angles, one each for the reigning
sultan, Mulat Hafld, his brother Mulal
Ismael. and the Mepnsed sultan Abd-El-Ails.
The latter has been out of a Job for
about three years. His reign was dls
unguisnea for its modem progressive
spirit, and as a patron of the liberal arts
his generosity made salesmen leap with
Joy and brought a succession of screams
from the taxpayers. The palace at Fes
became a museum for bicycles, motor cars
pnonograpns, moving pictures, sewing
machines and other up-to-date contrivances
that tickled the royal fancy. But he nes-
lected to coddle the tribesmen as diligently
as he did the salesmen, and woke up one
Tine morning to find a rifle at his nose
and a eel meter tickling his spine. Sultan
Mulal Hafld took the opposite course,
eacnewmg modernism and proclaiming
mmaeir a standpatter from sandal to fe.
Mulal Ismael Is an unknown quality, but
eager for the Job. France and Spain are
watching the fracas, both evidently anx
lous to butt In as soon aa the condmn.
afford an excuse for annexing a slice ef
territory. The three-cornered affair evi
dently has not assumed serious propor
tions. The distinguished kidnaper and
bandit Ralsuli maintains an attitude of
aiooiness mat indicates the scrap Is not
ripe ror loot. When Ralsuli takes
field the row will be worth while.
the
Australian refleratlon of states Is
founded on much the same lines aa the
unitea states. The federal constitution
defines the bounds of federal authority and
leaves the states supreme In local con
cerns. There, as here, the "twlllrht
of state authority Is steadily vanishing
u.mer me spurring necessity of federal
control. Since the labor party secured
TOn or federal government en
eroaehmenta on the sovereignity of states
movea oy leaps and bounds. Lut .
uie.on py me High Court set a definite
nmii to reaeral power in state matters,
'v"- me leaerai authorities to
measures calculated to wipe out most of
me ngnis hitherto vested In tha
For this purpose four amendments to the
constitution have been submitted to the
electors for ratWIoatlon or rejection. Ths
nrsi gives parliament Dower to r,.i..
iri ana commerce; the second, to con
trol tracing, financial and mlnlna- vm
uperaung in one state; the third
relates to the settlement of disputes: and
the fourth gives Parliament power over
trade monopolies and combines. These
iour propositions are Included in one ballot.
A second separate ballot will enable the
electors. Including men and woman. ...
whether the federal Parliament shall have
iwer to speciry what constitutes a
monopoly. That the conservative eUmn
regards these propositions as a menace Is
eviaem rrom the ominous words of the
Sydney Herald, which says: "Th.
stltutlon Is not only to be amended out of
.ence, ana me states destroyed, but
in nun vourt is to go. a j )t t
the peoples will that the commonwealth
is to be supreme, and ia to dav.ion ,.r
mer nrea or a constitution, there
can be nothing more to say. But it IS per
fectly clear to thoughtful minds that the
Afc.- - . r -KVM
m oi u an must be anarchy and olvll
x.,. an aire words to write, but
they are written In rrim earneat. .n
mey represent the truth."
To the French socialist an edHx.ti,
with a taint of religion Drod urea an re-
snamng or a red flag before a
bull. The other day the socialist demiti..
charged over the ministry because the gov
ernment naa not closed a high school for
girls conducted by the Ursuline nuns at
Basaa In the Olronde department. Pre
mier Monla. who had difficulty In gettina
a hearing, said that the permission ac
corded to the Ursullnes to continue to
teach In their school at Baxas was an act
or grace which waa rendered necessary bv
the fact that the new secular school build
ings were not yet available. The Ursullnea
themselves were an authorized order 'by
virtue of a royal ordinance In IMS. They
had been allowed to keep open their school
until next July. Thereafter, socialistic
teachers will mould the plastic minds of
the girls of Baxas.
The consumption of alcoholic drink in
the United Ktnsdom last year meant aa
expenditure ,of 1785,000,060 by the consum
ers; but, while this amount waa somewhat
higher than in 190, it was much less than
In 1899. when the British drink bill waa
IMO.OOO.OOO, almost a round billion. Ths
fact of a decreasing consumption Is es
tablished also by the marked decrease In
recent years In the mortality from aloo
hollara and cirrhosis of the liver the
scourge of the dipsomaniac
l.laaltatloae ef Moaeeely.
Springfield Republican.
Bryan said In the campaign of IMS that
control by one concern of more than to per
cent ef the country's production In any
line meant or tended to monopoly and that
the government should draw tha line there
aa a practical and reasonable measure of
trust restriction. This proposition was
much ridiculed by some people. Now
Chairman B. H. Qery of the United States
steel oorporatlon names SO per cant of the
country's production In the steal line as
enough for any one concern to control with
out raising the question ef monopoly, and
he says the corporation Intends to keep
within that proportion. It la now down to
U per cant. He Is thus evidently not far
from the Bryan view of what la a good
test ef monopoly or nonmonopoly.
WYAIL
Eeiiiy
The manufacturers of Royal Bak
ing Powder have always declined
to produce a cheap baking powder
at the sacrifice of quality.
Royal Baking Powder is made from
pure grape cream of tartar, and is
the embodiment of all the excellence
possible to be attained in the high
est class baking powder.
Royal Baking Powder costs only a
fair price, and is more economical'
at its price than any other leavening
agent, because of the superlative
quality and absolute wholesomeness
of the food it makes.
Mixture made in imitation of baling powders, but containing alum,
are frequently distributed from door lo door, or given away in grocery
stores. Such mixtures are dangerous to use in food. In England,
France, Germany and some sections of the United States their sale is
prohibited by law. Alum is a dangerous mineral acid, and all
physicians condemn baking powders containing it,
7b labml of mlmm bmking fjowttorm mumt
Bhow tbo IngrodJents.
READ THE LABEL
EDITORIAL SNAPSHOTS.
Washington Star: Colonel Roosevelt's
determined silence may make a consider,
able difference In the passenger traffic to
Oyster Bay next summer.
Kansas City Times: Pears at this time
would be rather disappointing to Juares,
which would hate to think it has been
scared all these months for nothing.
Chicago News: That movement for the
publicity of campaign expenses has long
had our earnest approval, but ws cannot
help wondering what It will do to the qual
ity of the campaign cigar.
Cleveland Plain Dealer: By putting Lord
Kitchener In command of the troops at the
coronation. It looks as if the British
authorities were taking every precaution
against an uprising of the suffragettes.
Houston Post: Lost you forget, remem
ber the democratic party when you say
your prayersl Pray that It may not be
led into populietlc temptation, but deliv
ered from socialistic evil and saved from
downright Idiocy.
Louisville Courier-Journal: The report
that Uncle Joe Cannon has come In from
the warpath and is now sweetly endeavor
ing to get on good terms with the Insur
gents will be followed by the announcement
that a wild bull got Into a china shop and
didn't break a saucer, a
MILWAUKHB AND SOCIALISM.
One Experlenee Enoesrh for Cream
Cltr Taxpayera.
Milwaukee Evening Wisconsin.
Milwaukee has had a. practical demon
stration of social democracy In operation,
and does not like It. The demonstration,
It may be urged, had not gone very far,
but It had gone far enough to reveal an
Immenae incapacity, a wild and credulous
predilection to visionary Innovations and
an utterly reoueas wastefulness of the
people's money.
It was recognised that unwise and waste
ful expenditures at the outset of the new
regime would be only the prelude to far
greater extravagances In the future, the
programme for which waa appalling to
people owning little homes and already
worried about the taxes.
This was the situation at the begin
ning of the campaign, which ended when
tha ballots were counted April 4. Dur
ing the progress of that campaign, social
democratlo candidates and speakers
made maay Incautious revelations of want
of love for American Institutions. Fur
thermore, they tried to profit by making
appeals to class hatred and by stirring up
religious prejudice.
The people 'Of Milwaukee did not like
the prospect of more social democracy,
so they rallied to the polls and voted
against the new party's candidates, not
one of who was eleoted, nearly all ot whom
were burled under an adverse vote of I
to L
The outlook for Milwaukee is brighter
than Is was before.
TRADINU OFF STATESMEN.
aaceste Changes Caloalatee e Im
prove the Political Soenery.
Washington Herald.
American humor did not miss the op
port unity offered by the case of Mr. Bryan
and the City of Memphis. Close upon the
heels of Mr. Bryan's refusal of an offer
of (3,000,000 to live in Memphis comes a
letter from the Omaha Commercial club,
offering to let Memphis have Mayor Dahl
man for 11.500,400. There must be many
cities, towns and villages In the United
States which oould be Induced to part
with their superfluous statesmen If Mem
phis really means business.
San Francisco, the New York Evening
Post suggests, probably would take II,-
000.000 for Mayor McCarthy, with a dis
count off for cash. Albany may accept 1760,
000 for William Barnes, Jr., or might con
sent to trade, taking two-thirds cash and
the rest In Tennessee wire-pullers.
We need only tourh upon the possibilities
connected with Charles P. Murphy and
Goorge B. Cos, whom their respective com
munities might afford to let Memphis have
with a 11.000 SCO premium thrown In and
still make money.
Near aa Vet 8 rar.
Philadelphia Record.
Just seven states more are needed to
ratify the income tax amendment to the
conatitutlon out of eleven that have yet
to vole on It.
TAPS ON THE FUNNYB0NE.
Man With the Bulging Brow Wisdom,
according to Solomon, brings length of
days. You ought to cultivate It.
Man With the Bulbous Nose Gosh: The
days are too long for me as they srel
Chicago Tribune.
"They tell me th'
great deal to lighten
guv'nor Is doln' a
th' burdens of th'
common people.
"Guess likely he Is. He's gettln' fifty a
night fer his talk on 'Reform,' an' I'm tolrl
he's payin' off th' mortgage on his home
an' puttln' money In th' bank. 'Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
"I specks dar's trouble comin' to dat
gemman," said the waiter.
"What's he been doln'?" ;
"He done ordered deviled crab and angel
cake fob. de same meal." Washington SMr.
Bill, the Bachelor Are you Interested In
the Easter fashion parade.
Benedict, thu Married Man If you could
see the shrinkage In my envelope you
would not ask about any kind of a pay
raid. Baltimore American.
"You know, George, that you shouldn't
think of going to the opening game. Don t
you remember what Dr. Cutting said about
your throat?"
"Who? Doc. Cutting? Why. Doc. and I
are going to tha game together." Cleve
land Plain Dealer.
"Does that long-haired Mr. Bllngsby get
much money from his writings?"
"Very little, I fancy. He got a dollar a
word not long ago, I'owever.
"Mercy! How was that?"
"Why, a man owed htm $2. Hltngshv
wrote 'Please remit' on the bill and tlie
man sent him the money." Cleveland
Plain Dealer.
"My constituents never fall to accord ni
continuous applause," remarked Senator
Sorghum, hopefully.
"Yes," replied Farmer Corntoaael. "A
lot o' folks out our way would rather
hear themrelves cheer than listen to an
other nm i talk." Washington Star.
"Phe claims a perfect alibi."
"What is her alibi?"
"She says that she can prove that at the
time the crime was committed her Utile
girl was brushing her hair."
"That proves an alibi for her hair, buy,
how about herself?" Houston Post.
SEEING THE GAME.
Milwaukee Sentinel.
He took his wife to see the game,
A frenzied tan was he.
He called the players each by name.
Explained the pastime to his dame. '
"Ah, yes!" she said. "I see!"
The game waxed hot; the score was tie,
The home team up to bat.
He turned to her with gleaming eye.
"Some game!" he said. She made reulyi
"Ain't that a fearful hat!"
When Bill McBlffer hit the sphere,
And knocked It out of sight,
He turned and hollered In her ear:
"O, pipe that wallop, wlfle. dear!"
Quoth she: "That hat's a fright!"
And gaily did the batters blng.
And runners crossed the plate.
The fan. ah gladly did he sing!
Quoth she: "That hat's a cheap old thlngi
, "A dollar nlnety-elghtl"
And at the finish of the strife
He whispered to his dame:
"Believe me, 'twas some battle, wife!"
Her answer cut him like a knife.
Quoth she: "Who won the game?"
A Sale for a Day
Miller, Stewart Beaton
Co. announce a Linoleum
bale for Manday, April 24.
Highest grade gooda for to-be-wondered-at
prices. If
you attended our rug sale
last Monday you know what
to expect next Monday In
linoleum concessions.
Wholesale & Retail
HAVEHS-WHITE
COAL CO.
iwitctimi
i COAL
Icmama. Nta
1710
FARNAM ST.
D4M kU. A-12II
If 1
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