TUB I1KK: OMAHA. WKDNKSDAY. MAT6CII 29. 1911.
Hme Ma
Ohe, Dees Junior. Dkthday Dgdk
Dottio Dialogues
HY WALTER A. SINCLAIR.
This Time it it Fink Circm Lemonade
Piffle.
Ml he ecg
This is ihe
i
1)
t
Hprlng U profanely heralded by th
'Cus Twins 'lr u4 Cro," observed Dottle.
we Wended our way through the men
sgcrie toward the big ihow.
"I suppose th sawdust U furnished by
he clown's old sews," I chirped.
"Here w hav th leopard, with a pri
vate detective constantly In attendance, to
kep him potted," he continued.
' "And yonder is the camel, of which the
farmef said. There hain't no euch ani
mal!" " I added.
To the ght, the fee-ro-olous Bengal
; tagger, the only vegetarian tagger In cap
' tlvlty," she announced. In her elrcu voice
"Likewise the roaring Nubian lion, cap
tured In th wilds of Hamburg, Germany,"
1 Interposed. "He Is called a.roerlng lion
because his Brooklyn attendant feeds him
JrtAt he call 'rawr meat, in place of bis
usual Hamburg teak."
"Ah, th keeper steaks him to a roar."
she comprehended.
"Here we have th celebrated dik-dlk, a
same some would like to condense to a
' dlx. found In the Jungles of Africa and
Albany, training with tigers." quoth I.
"And to the left the bandarlog, in their
,, bandarlog cabin," she hinted. "I grow
, athlrst for knowledge."
"Well, I'll negotiate for two gourds of
pink lemonade, but mind you, don't try to
bite, bend or Injur Jha lemon, as It Is
plaoed In the glass purely for ornamental
purposes," I sighed. "I am going to patent
t a plaster of parts lemon slice for circus
lemonade.!'
"Be sure you us fast colors or you'll
be guilty of plaster of parlslds," she
' warned as we sipped.
"Mayhap you feel goobernatorlal?" I
Insinuated, feebly,
' "What's a circus without peanuts?" she
countered. "By all means."
I'll n.if buv all. only two sacks," I re
torted. Indignantly. "What kind of a shell
same are you proposing?"
, "I thought maybe some of that sticky
ink noDcorn which adheres to ones nn
gers and chin would furnish local color,"
she cooed, hopefully.
"Pop-oorn sounds so suggestive of pro-
dossJs." 1 demurred.
"Kvldently you ar not a buffalo," h
intimated coldly.
"I don't quit get that," I admitted
...V cWhy buffaloes?"
"Th buy on," sh explained, weeruy.
Lot us hasten past th baggag room,"
I cried
"Old stuff about th elephants' trunks?"
she Inquired.
A
"WHILE, TO THE RIGHT "
"I'm looking for the Mexican hairless
dogs of war," I remarked.
"They're now on Chl-wow-wow having
a close shave," she snickered.
"After that I'm too faint to stand." 1
asserted. "Let us hasten In to the main
arena In time for the grand entry, pre
senting a pageant of parading, promenad
ing paragons, a glittering galaxy of gor
geous gayety, a stunning, scintillating sun
bunt of surprisingly superfluous satiety,
a"
"You don't get paid for that, do you?"
she asked, anxiously.
"I was merely sketching a miniature,"
I expounded.
"Sounded like you were painting th
larger canvases, speaking artistically." ,
"Let us In to see the equestriennes and
trapeze soubrettes In their harem skirts,
considerably shrunken," I suggested.
"Would you call the damsels who per
form on the horlsontal bars 'barmaids?' "
she queried. '
"I might, if I was a bit foggy,". I re
plied. "Hark! The band, again playing
that familiar 'umpah' theme. How It
take m back!"
"Just when I wanted to go forward,"
she said.
"Have you no sentiment - when you go
to the circus?" I demanded. "What char
acter la your favorite?"
"The ringmaster," said she, emphasising
ing ring and looked Into my eyea with th
most Innocent glance.
(Copyright, 1911, by th N. Y. Herald Co )
Glad to Have Bunny Back
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DayVe
Celebrate
c , y'z:- I
RALPH RRDFITCLD,
JU04 Blnney Street.
Natii ind Address.
Ellen M.. Atkins, 1739 Park Ave 1
ElUabeth Beers. 2301 North Twenty-fourth St.,
Elsie M. Christie, 1608 Burdette St
Leroy Cremwell, 1D01 Lothrop St
Delia Detamore, 2016 Charles St
Fern O. Dudley, 1811 North Twenty-sixth St Lon
March 29, 1911.
Hrhool.
, Park . . .
. Long . . .
Lake . . .
. High
. Kellom ..
Loretta's Looking Glass-Holds it Up to Girl W ho is Domineering J
t "Is It a i
Vemking dowi
i I "No, no,"
' Oisnd. Borne
V
i
i
r
"Bunny, let's play borae. You b th
horse and I'll"
"But I don't want to play horse, Buster.
My cheeks ar all hot bow."
"Thaf th way with Uttl alatara. Just
when you want to play'hora and things
th most, why thy won't."
But my head all hurts," whimpered
Bunny, as you gently but firmly tied the
topes about her arms and finally careened
away. slaahUuj your whip which was Just
a switch and acting as much Ilk a coach
man as memory and circumstances would
permit.
Down th path in th cardan, around th
lilac trees, back to th front porch you
di-ov your prancing steed.
minute new," gasped Bunny,
wn on th veranda steps.
you urged, taking ber by th
Somehow th feel of that tiny hot
hand and the queer look on Bunny' fac
dampened your ardor and you. too, sat on
the step close beside her. Mother came
out and found you there, and when you
told her you were resting because Bunny
was all hot and achy, sh was all in
nutter at one. First sh smoothed back
Bunny' bright hair that waa all gold and
shiny when th Sua Man peeked through
th curls. Then mother looked at Bunny's
tongue and fait her wrist. . Befor you
could ask why Bunny couldn't play horse
any mora, aha had been whisked away in
mother's arms and was lying in her cool
little; room with her nlghtl on In the
middle of th day.
For a long time after that you didn't
see Bunny any Dior. There waa no on to
fight for you whan th Junes boys didn't
play fair and you couldn't drive because
there was no horse. You saved the apple
th Cook Lady gav you, three bites of
which belonged to Bunny, for days, and
were still saving It. Every day you asked,
"Will slater play with m tomorrow?"
And when you asked, tears would run
down mother's cheeks and father would
say, "Not tomorrow, my man."
Once, when you had been dreadful quiet
all day, and father stayed horn and you
only saw blm and mother once, with their
faces all scared and white, you slipped up
to Bunny's door and peeked through. You
weren't quit sure th Uttl girt that lay
so still on th bad was Bunny sh was so
thin and all her golden curls were gone.
Then when you knew It was Uttl slater
you saw they had taken away Teady. th
roused her and awakened her mind to
activity."
"When sh comes to play with m again
I'll giv hr all my appls." you volun
teered, as mother and father each held
on of your hands so tightly It hurt. And
you were sorry for th ' Jones boys, who
didn't have any HttU sister" to whom t
give their apples.
r
Knock Another Knock
J
Women have a bad reputation In on
respect. Bom men wouldn't give a rea
cent for their chances of coming out even
if they bad to deal with women, and among 1
these are men who manage those restaur
ants where each person helps himself.
One of them expressed himself very em
phatically th other day to a. woman who
bad evinced an Interest In the shortcom
ing bo of her sisters.
"If 1,000 men 'were to com In here and
each one ate fl worth. I would have just
11.000." he said, by way of example. "On
the other hand, if I should feed 1,000 women
and allow them to pick out their own
checks I might possibly have $500. but I
doubt It- Oh, they are natural morn
cheats, women are. It seem to be a sixth
sense In every woman's makeup to try to
get aheaed of th person who provides her
meals. It Isn't lack of money that makes
them do It, either: It's dishonesty, pure and
simple, that's all." ' ;
Th woman to whom those horrifying
revelations had been made walked away
trying to evolve some plan for emanclpat
Ing her sisters from the web of dishonest
propensities In which they had become en
meabed. Ovitelde th restaurant she met a
man friend.
"I'v just been down there for lunch," Ji
said. "Glorious place; cheap, too. It a
fellow has th knack It is dead easy to
get a Ge-cent meal for a quarter. I work
'cm that way nearly every day. They
never watch the men, but I tell you they
keep a sharp eye on you women." New
York Herald.
"See that the things are sent at once!"
the domineering girl said, with the arro
gant, supercilious, self-important air that
ah always uses to those she considers her
Inferiors.
But this time she met her match in the
little Irish saleswoman, who poised her
pencil above her book and said, "Shall I
send it car of th prialdent at the White
House or Balnt Peter at the pearly gate?"
For once th domineering girl was meek.
She gav her address like a lady and left
th stors as soon as possible. For domin
eering girls do not like to, be reduced to
their elemental Ingredients by a clever "In
ferior."
That is th reason why the servants, the
clerks, the people who are dependent and
cannot retaliate for fear of losing their
bread and butter Jobs are chosen as the
victims of th girl who domineers, the ring
mistress of modern life.
Ob, but It's a hateful trait! Its Just
r
Yawn for Your Health
J1
Yawning may be very impolite, but all
beautiful whit. bear. Santa brought her to"!6 uam he Aoct0 re now decl-r1n
keen .... th- Bd. Man. and M..h ,hat good awn healthy cxercls for
keep away th Boogie Man, and which
slept - clasped in her arm every night
Down to th playroom they flew. Perhaps
that was. why Bunny waa so whit ah
was. afraid without Teddy. You found
blm tucked - away with Belinda doll In a
play basket Back to the room you scur
ried and, without asking mother or father
or th woman in th whit cap and apron
who took car of th bottle and teaspoons,
you marched up to th little pal girl on
the ' bed, ' Leaning close over her shorn
head, you said, "Bunny, here la Teddy
come to aleep with you."
Slowly Bunay'a eyes opened and the
coraera of her mouth smiled. "Buster
Teddy, aha whlrpered In th Weakest Uttl
volo that mad your throat all tight, you
felt so sorry.
Then mother and father had you In their
arms. "Mjr man. that is th first word
uttl sister has spoken la a week." said
father. .
"Father, Buster, sh spoke te us Bunny
poke te us." Mother waa laughing and
crying both together.
"Kb Just wanted Teddy, that's all. She's
afraid without him,' you explained.
lr. Brown came while you were speak-
v Ing. For a long time he stood by the bed
) and looked at Bunny. Sometimes he did
queer thins, Uk placing hla head against
her and putting a silver thing la her mouth.
Every en was so atlll they didn't even
breath.
"Hubert Is better. Th crisis Is past."
he aald la a grave vole. "Something has
for
th lungs and throat Dr. Emil Bunsl, th
dlstlnguUhed throat specialist of Vienna,
in speaking recently of diseases of th
throat and remedies, said that yawning la
a valuable exercise and should be encour
aged. Morever, yawning has recently been
recommended Independently as a valuable
exercise for th respiratory organs.
According to Dr. Naegli of th University
or L.uettlch, "yawning bring all th res
piratory muscles of the chest and throat
Into action, and la, therefore, the best and
most natural means of strengthening them.
He advises everybody to yawn as deeply
as possible, with arras outstretched. In
order to change completely th air In th
lungs and stimulat respiration. In many
caaea be has found th practice relieve the
difficulty in swallowing and disturbance of
the sense of hearing that accompany ca
tarrh of th throat. Th patient Is Induced
to yawn through suggestion. Imitation ef
a preliminary exercise In deep breathing.
uvsuaut consists of trout six te
eight yawns, each followed by th opera-
uon oi swallowing, a should be added.
however, that It is quite possible for deep
breathing te be overdone, particularly by
persons with weak hearts, and It la at
least open to question whether the ob
stacles te free reeptratloa, which the yawn
Ing cure la alleged to remove, are not ore
ful la preventing the entrance of germs and
other foreign bodies."
as mean as hitting a man when he Is down
or picking on an enemy weaker and
smaller than yourself. It is doing that!
And you seem to think that you are
emphasizing your own importance, Im
pressing people with the sis of yourself.
You are making th ones you abuse hate
you. You are making every decent-minded
person In your own set look down upon
you. t
The instant you domineer over one who
is dependent on you la any way you have
reached the vanishing point of your self
respect And you make things hideously uncom
fortable for those who are Inclined or de
termined to treat servants and clerks and
elevator boys and street far conductors as
they should be treated.
Wherever you pass you leave a trail of
Insolence and indignation. The poison of
your' arrogance puts a kink In the dis
positions of perfectly well-disposed people.
And an unoffending Individual gets
snappy 'step lively.' A demure little lady
who doe not shout out the number of th
floor where she wants to leave th eleva
tor Is carried past, and th elevator boy
sends "Why don't you say whers you want
to git off?" hurtling after ber. A polite
shopper asks to be directed to a depart'
ment, and the cash girl continues to chew
gum as she yells a reply to the stock girl
about the location of the milliner's pincers,
The girl who domineers has so sbused
their natural, Justifiable sense of equality
that they have to giv themselves a few
concrete Illustrations Just to be sure that
their Independence is in working order.
And th domineering girl talks about her
Inferiors. Sh has no inferiors. There
can be nothing inferior to the base spirit
she manifests.
She has gotten down on the bottom
stratum. She Is cipher minus In value
There simply can't be anything under her.
Persistent Advertising is the Road to
Big Keturna.
PP"I soy
HIT HE -
heowk- tr sou don't
UICK HIM-fLL UCK
YOU-
HEM.nrr
r Zr!t NOW'VOU OUST
L,lH "
1 ' ' i in 1 1 i
Yea.
1901
1904
1899
1896
1901
1901
1900
1899
1904
1901
1897
1897
190S
1897
1901
Kennedy.. 189S
1904
1908
Algle Dllly, 1818 Ohio St Lake . .
Florence Goehrlng, 2724 Blondo St Long . .
Emily Hood, 2114 Grand Ave Saratoga
Arthur Q. Jensen. 1423 Gust St Sherman
Marie Jorgenson, 2427 South Twentieth St Castellar
William Lebo, 2222 Ixard St Kellom ,
Lena Lokololusky, 2503 South Thirty-fifth St Windsor
Florence Moller, 2717 Meredith Ave Saratoga
Wlnnefred Modlln, 3840 Grover St Windsor
Marion Osborn, 3118 Corby St Howard
Margaret A. Ostrom, 1408 South Thirteenth St Lincoln
Otis Pedersen, 2910 Franklin St Long . .
August M. Propleach, Second St. and Boulevard.
Adalbert Pierce, 2608 Franklin St
Alfred Ryder, 2S60 Brown St
Ralph Redfleld, 2004 Binney St
Mary I. Reed, 4339 Miami St
Harold M. Smith, 2630 Chicago St
Grace Shipman, 1416 Jones St
Margaret Talmage, 2025 North Nineteenth St...
Mildred Tompsett, 1613 Lake St
Dean Tinker, 311 North Twenty-first St
Lillle E. Thrane, 172 4 South Seventeenth St
Nelson B. Updike, Jr., 3614 Jackson St Columbian .
Leonard P. Weber. 2226 North Forty-eighth St Walnut Hill.
Doris E. Ware, 1711 Hickory St Comenlus 1899
Olivene Wllklns, 2726 Capitol Ave Farnam ...1904
Hannah Zllllch. 2816 Cass St Webster 1903
Ben Zalinsky, 2921 South Twenty-sixth St Im. Conception. . ..1903
. German Lutheran
. Long
. Saratoga . .
. Lothrop . . .
.Clifton Hill.
. Webster . . .
. .Leavenworth
. .Lake
.Lake
, .Central
. . Comenlus . .
.1898
. . ..1904
lS9 5
.. . .1908
. . ..1906
. . . .1900
1903
. . ..1904
. . . .1898
1900
1896
....1903
. . . .1896
Pituitary Gland Potential
J
Prof. Arthur Keith at th English Royal,
college of Surgeons, believes giants can
be raised In these days. He asserted this
belief in a recent lecture on th fossil re
mains of a giant.
"Bo far," he said, "we have only un
locked the door of th unknown. We do
not know exactly what .the room will con
tain when we enter it, but we think that
when we have done that, we shall have the
means of regulating the size and stature
of body at will. Modern research has
proved that the growth of a giant Is due to
a diseased condition. Recent discoveries
relating to th cause of giantism have
shown that the key to the growth was
found In what Is called the pituitary body
at th base of the skull..
"It is a Uttl thing which would not
fill a teaspoon. It la smaller than a
grape, and yet we know it to be a thing
of very great Importance. It was dis
covered by a French physician, Ilerre
Mart, who found also that In cases of
abnormal growth this small body had en
tered. He Jumped at the Idea that It must
secret something which somehow affected
th growth of th body.
"Now it has been found that in the pitui
tary gland are secreted a number of liquid
substances which ar deposited In th
blood. Possibly at a future date, scientists
may be able to extract that one unknown
essential substance and by feeding the Sub
ject with it will be able to make the growth
go on continuously. Now, normal growth
occurs In stages. There are weeks when a
child stays the same also. This Is followed
by weeks when it grows, for the pituitary
body Is only active by fits. '
"When the unknown secretion Is too
plentiful In adults, It cause unusual stout
ness, but In the young, who have not yet
flniahed their growth, an abnormal growth,
or giantism, results. Science therefore holds
out th hop that people may be able to
regulate their heights, and that beauty
doctors may be able to work on strictly
scientific principles.
"If a lady, for instance, did not think
that her nose was symmetrical a doctor
could bring It to th shape required by
means of a pltultal sandwich."
When Nova Scotia Flirted with Uncle Sam
J
At this time, when certain British colonies
are so touchy, apparently, on the possi
bility of annexation, It will be Interesting
to read certain resolutions Introduced in
tho Nova Scotia legislature forty years ago.
At that time the settlement of the Ala
bama claims was pending, and some brave
spirit put th Nova Bcotla sentiment in
thes words:
'Whereas, Th Joint high commission
appointed by the government of Great
Britain and th United States of America
to consider the Alabama claims (so-called),
the fishery question and other matters in
dispute between these two governments,
will shortly sit at Washington; and
whereas, It Is conceded by the British gov
ernment that England may be liable to the
Urlted States for a large amount on ac
count of the Alabama claims aforesaid;
and wherdeas, this hous Is most desirous
that th burden should fall as lightly upon
the Imperial treasury a possible; there
fore, "Resolved, That this house do Immedi
ately, through his excellency the governor
general, Intimate to her most gracious
majesty, the queen, that should sh be
graciously pleased to cede this province to
the United States as payment In part of In
full of such claims, sues cession will meet
with the cheerful consent of this hous;
provided always that the United Btates
will admit this province Into th .union as
a state, with all th rights and privileges
now held and enjoyed by any of the states
comprising such union containing a Uk
population, and upon such terms, financial
or otherwise, as may be agreed upon by
such Joint high commission, the terms of
such cession to b sanctioned by th gov
ernments of Great Britain and the United
States, and to be ratified by the people ef
this province at th polls."
Nothing aver came of the movement.
f
Man Still Gropes Darkly V
Prof. T. D. A. Cockrell of the University
of Colorado, in Popular Science Monthly,
writ In interesting fashion of th social
conditions likely to exist In th futur. He
ays that In th garden of Eden, at the
very beginning of his career, man ac
quired th sens of sin and was henceforth
to be a wanderer in a spiritual as well as
a physical sens Henc It comes that we.
In this year UU, think; proper to tnquir
anxiously about th future of our species,
an Inquiry which would certainly never
occur to any ether species of muimsL
"Along with the development of th med
ical and agricultural science, w may hop
for great advance In social organisation,
reducing to a minimum th tremendous
wast of life and property which goe on
today. It is not too much to xpct that
very Individual will be assured all the
air, food, clothes and shelter necessary for
a normal exlstenoe, and will find ampl op
portunities for exercising such talents as
he may posses.
"Liberty will be ourtalled In so far as
It permit anti-social activities, but It will
be tremendously extended, In the form of
practical opportunities, to develop ordinary
or special abilities.
"All this may be a long way ahead, and
ther may exist great differences as to
th program for th near future; but I
suppose that few will deny that such out
come as that Indicated should logically
follow from Indefinite advance In th di
rection w are even now taking."
A Tesvjrfal Recital.
"Gentlemen," said an American, who had
been listening to some "steep" stories,
"you hav all don your best, but I think
any yarn will make your look small. I
was one treed by a most ferocious bull
moose. To make matters worse, my am
munition gave out. As I thought of th
loved one at horn tear cam in my
yes, rolled down on to th palm of ray
hand, and frose hard as marbles. A happy
thought flashed through my mind. Taking
the frosen tears, I rammed them Into my
gun, biased away, killed the moose, and
then, gentlemen, and then"
The story-teller's audience filed ouC-
Tit-Bits,