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THE OMAHA SUNDAY HEE: SEITEMRER 4, 1010.
The Omaha Sunday Bee
FOUNDED BY EDWARD ROHEWATER.
VICTOn ROflKWATKH, 'EDITOR.
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STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION.
Stat of Nebraska, Douglas County, :
Osorg B. TsschucJt, treasurer of Tu Be
Publishing Company, being duly sworn,
says that the actual number t full and
complete copies of Th Dally, Morning,
Kvenlng and Sunday Bee printed during
th month of August. 1I0. waa as follows;
1 43,670
2 43,490
1 43,470
,4 43.610
6 ,,,..43.000
43.S40
7 40,000
1 49,80
17 4,7O0
It 43,480
1..... 43,3sO
30 43,600
SI 40,100
12 43,840
23 43,380
24 43,460
21 43,300
2 43,490
27 43,490
21 40,100
21 43.3M
It ,,43,440
II... 43,990
9
...45,330
10..
.43,730
U 43,730
11 43,040
11 43,730
It. 89,000
11 43,300
It 43,100
Total ........
Btnrnd copies .
1,389,730
14,337
total
Sally araraf
1,318,443
43,433
OEORQB B. TZ8CHCCK.
Treasurer.
Subscribed In my presence and aworn
to before tn this 1st day of September. 1910.
M, B. WALKER.
Notary Public.
Subscriber leaving- th ctty tem
porarily ehoold have The Bee
mailed to thens. Address will be
chanced aa often aa requested.
"Hoke der goveruor" la no joke In
Georgia.
The school teachers and preachers
will now return to business.
It begins to look as it Dr. Cook may
have gone the war of Charley Robs.
Religion, like vegetation, must have
both sunshine and rain to make It
thrive.
Colonel Roosevelt made no secret ot
the fact that he had a "bully" time in
Omaha.
Kansas has an editor named Jack
Frost. He ought to give it to his
readers cold.
The San Francisco Chronicle says
' "The big bat has come back." Had
. it been away?
It was inevitable that Japan would
soon devour Korea, for it had had it
pickled for a long time.
That awful day draweth nigh for
the "barefoot boy with cheek of tan."
Remember how you longed for the
"first day of school?" Do you?
Despite occasional rumors to the
contrary, it is neither old-fashioned,
entirely, nor unpopular to tell the
, truth. Come on, boys, out with It.
What if Methuselah had had access
: to all the facilities for the simple life
and longevity that we have today? He
might have lived to a ripe old age.
The fountain of perpetual youth has
been definitely located on the Zigzag
river in Oregon. But poor Ponce de
Leon, he died in blissful ignorance.
We have Mr. Bryan's word for it,
in additfon to that of the other leaders
of his party, that he will not be a
candidate for the presidency in 1912.
This must be the day of the plain
people in Georgia. At leaBt no man,
except he be named Smith or Brown,
seems to have much show for the gov
ernorship. One cannot doubt that the optimism
of Mayor Qaynor bad much to do with
his early and uninterrupted recovery
from a wound which might have
killed him.
Mayor Selclel of Milwaukee, who re
fuses to receive Roosevelt, might slip
around the corner and get a glimpse
of him while the crowd is not watch
ing him, though.
Just to let Chicago get an accurate
idea of what it has to do to work out
Its "manifest destiny" of becoming
the American metropolis. New York
shows up with those 4,788,000.
Still, the annexation of Korea by
the mikado was not on the cards as
laid out in that Russo-Japanese treaty.
But what ia a little thing like a treaty
when you have a chance to pick up a
whole nation?
Mr. Bryan's Commoner has Con
gressman Hitchcock already elected to
the United States senate. But in view
of past predictions from that source
we take it that Mr. Hitchcock will not
accept the Commoner's statement as a
rertlflrats of election.
Neutralization.
It was anticipation of a demand on
the part of the International peace ad
vocates for neutralization on the canal
tone that led Colonel Roosevelt to
take advantage of the occasion of his
public address at Omaha to say, and to
say it emphatically, that Uncle Sam's
next big, Job after completion ot the
ditch and locka is to fortify the works
and to make sure of holding them
against all comers. Colonel Roosevelt
does not believe In neutralization in
the form that it Is likely to be pro
posed under some International agree
ment between the big world powers
either to keep the canal open alike to
all or to shut It alike to all who may
be engaged in conflict on the high seas.
He believes that the canal Watted for
the United States to build it because
no other power had both the grit and
the resources to do the work, and that
as Uncle Sam is the man behind the
shovel he ought to have preferential
benefits produced by his labor If any
one is to have any ad vantage out of it.
The Panama canal Is peculiarly an
American institution of most direct and
vital concern to our people, making,
as it does, our shore line almost con
tinuous instead of being cut, as now,
In two remote halves separated by a
continent compelling a detour of thou
sands and thousands of miles, consum
ing weeks of time to pass from our
east coast to our west coast. The
neutralization of the canal tone and
of the canal Colonel Roosevelt is con
vinced would, Instead of strengthen
ing us with other world powers, actu
ally weaken us and expose us to their
mercy, If not make our nation a laugh
ing stock the world over.
This is a subject of momentous im
port, which, it must be confessed, has
so far not attracted the attention it
deserves, or rather has attracted prac
tically no attention at all. By what
we are doing at Panama Uncle Sam
will have transformed the face of the
map, making the greatest change In
the configuration of the globe that has
ever been artificially produced. We
are spending hundreds of millions of
dollars to accomplish this colossal
task, and the few millions that would
be needed for effective fortification
and defense would be a comparatively
small item, big as it would look.
Colonel Roosevelt's idea is that the
only neutralization of the canal zone
that should be permitted should be its
neutralization by the United States
itself, which will be maintained as
neutral territory by such conduct as
will maintain our dignity and power
abroad and put other powers in awe
some fear of tackling us without just
cause. In this way we would have
complete neutralization whenever
world peace reached that point which
would guarantee to every foot of
American soil Immunity from foreign
attack, and not till then.
Wo venture. the guess that what
Colonel Roosevelt said at Omaha about
our policy with reference to the canal
zone was transmitted to the foreign
offices of all the great naval nations
before twenty-four hours had elapsed,
and that it will arouse intense interest
In inner circles abroad far greater
than here in this country. There is
food for deep thought in this program,
and although the completion of the
canal is possibly five years off, it is
none too early for us to study the sit.
uatlon soberly and carefully and hear
all sides that may be presented. Un
less the advocates of neutralisation
have some convincing arguments not
yet offered our people will expect
Uncle Sam to stand guard over the
Panama isthmus and say to the world,
"No thoroughfare except with my per
mission." Clergy Criticises the Church.
Many clerymen are taking the posi
tion that the church Is closing the door
of opportunity and invitation to the
young man entering the ministry by
not only paying meager salaries, but
limiting his period of desirable service.
A minister who says he has been a
member of governing boards of col
leges and a seminary for many years,
writing to the Interior of Chicago un
der the signature of "A Pastor," says:
The church la so limiting the active
and Income-producing; period of th min
istry that It la not surprising that man
iiue iv iwr umer ueioa wnicti orrer a
larger range of effective service.
He then cites a case where a church,
wanting a pastor, rejected two candi
dates, one of whom was Just past 40,
the other less than 50 and both strong
and vigorous and pious, on the ground
that they were "too old;" another case
of a church rejecting a minister
candidate on the' same ground who
was 4 5. one church was a rather
prominent city organization, the other
a small country place paying, with the
aid of the home mission bosrd, less
than $1,000 a year, This pastor then
adds:
Now If the church la going to say to
our ministry that it will require them
to take an educational courae which they
can scarcely finish before they are 26,
and will cease to desire their servlces at
40, and thus limit their employment to
fifteen years. Is It fair to ask young men
to enter the ministry? I shall urge them
In that direction no longer while the
church limits their service to such a
short term.
Certainly this criticism and this
minister's position seem to be unas
sailable In the circumstances. But
how is the church going to justify
such a narrow course, or long endure
In the pursuit of it? Of course, the
church will endure, but it will be by
coming to its senses as to the treat
ment of the men it calls to its pulpits.
No business or other profession offers
ss little of material encouragement as
does the Christian ministry. Why?
There Is no reasonable answer.
No wonder the church finds that too
many of its ministers are mediocre;
no wonder it complains that "men do
not attend church." Such short
sighted policies would wreck any other
institution. As a matter of fact, what
the church needs Is more ssnlty and
conservatism and wisdom in its pul
pits, and therefore it needs men
seasoned by years of experience and
piety and learning. Age should be at
a premium Instesd of a discount. More
than that, it Is a simple repudiation of
a solemn obligation for the church to
call young men to the ministry and
then shut the door in their faces at 40,
while they are still young.
Off to School.
' In the life of every mother there
comes a time when she must relin
quish sole and absolute authority over
her little ones and share it with an
outsider. That seems anomalous and
uninviting, yet what serious minded,
thinking mother, who has stood at her
door on the first day of a new school
year and for the first time bade her
little one goodbye as he or she goes
forth to begin the struggle for an edu
cation, does not know that this Is
true?
The first day of school, therefore,
often brings a little pang of melan
choly to more than the romping boy
who reluctantly passes out of his sum
mer's vacation into the work of an
other year. But the mother who does
not understand that this sharing of a
duty with the teacher means enlarge
ment and not curtailment of her own
individual responsibility misses the
lesson entirely. The little one, whose
sole companion has been its mother,
may not as often run with its childish
worries and trials to "mamma," may
not again enjoy the unbroken intimacy
with, that mother which the nursery
made possible, but in a new and better
sense she and th mother remain com
panlons. Her little vision of life grad
ually widens and takes in a broader
scope, new objects each bringing its
own meaning and significance, and this
all brings back to the mother duties
and responsibilities which the teacher,
though she be the mother's co-worker
in now shaping the destiny of this
young life, cannot entirely meet and
satisfy.
As the sharer with the mother in
such solemn duties of training young
minds, the teacher becomes a most im
portant factor in the home and the
state, and it ought to be the part of
every teacher to understand this thor
oughly. To her, no matter how much
it may look still to the mother of its
infancy, the child will Inevitably look
to the teacher for a large part of its
development. This relation between
pupil and teacher must obtain if the
best results are to be accomplished,
and it ia a short-sighted parent who
would seek to deny or evade this
division of authority with the teacher.
But, just the same, these first days
of school always will hring their little
silent pangs of emotion.
Strikes and Coal Prices.
Before old Jack Frost has blown his
first chilly breath upon us comes the
first advance in the price of coal.
Semi-anthracite went up 60 cents on
the ton during the week and coal deal
erg predict further increases. One,
in fact, says be would not be surprised
to see it go higher than it has ever
been. This action of one kind of fur
nace fuel, of course, . will have its
effect upon the other kinds, a most
cheering thought for the householder
who had been counting on cutting
down his coal bills this winter.
The mines from which this grade of
coal comes have been idle for some
time and are said to be full of water.
The miners and their employers came
to a slight disagreement over business
matters last spring and have not as
yet adjusted their differences, nor do
they seem likely to soon. Whether
they do or not, the mines have been
Idle so long that this dealer says the
law of supply and demand will show
an offish balance all season.
Coal mine strike is an old story in
this country and it does not matter so
much to the consumer who is to blame
whether the employe or employer
generally both are he pays the
freight at all events. It is a poor com
ment on the efficiency of the coal
miners' organisations and the mine
owners' ability to deal with the labor
situation for these conditions to recur
every year. It Is not right to impose
unnecessary hardships of this sort on
the people, who have no hand In pro
voking the trouble. They are put to
it bad enough to meet the general run
of prices as they are fixed by ordinary
economic conditions and ought not
to have to endure additional burdens
which come directly from the refusal
of two stubborn factions to get to
gether. It should be possible for the
state to enect reconciliations where
private parties will not, or cannot.
What the Spanish Crisis Means.
The crisis in Spain is essentially
neither political nor religious, In the
Judgment of some of the eminent stu
dents of the situation, one of whom Is
Andre Tridon, who, in the current
number of the Forum, asserts that the
situation is merely the outward symp
torn of an economlo readjustment.
A careful insight into the conditions
and those that have created tbem
seems to bear out this theory. This
author sums up the esse In these few
words: "The Spanish rulers and the
Spanish nation no longer need the
support of the Vatican; accordingly
they are going to throw off the flnan
clal burden which close relations with
Rome entail unavoidably."
There was a time, aa he says, when
Spain needed the polltkal and finan
clal support which the friendship of
Rome could aid it in obtaining, and
that time was as recent an the close of
the Spanish-American war, when the
Influence of the Vatican was sufficient
to create public opinion all over Ku
rope favorable to Spain. But Spain's
currency needs no such appreciation
today and she feels that the alliance
so long maintained with Rome does
not now offer sufficient returns for
what it costs to continue it.
This appears to be a very rational
explanation of the situation, and the
fact that every spectacular feature of
the dlsturbsnces attending the so
called revolution has been promptly
thwarted offers some additional proof
of this theory. Not even the burning
passion of the Cartists to make this
appear as simply a political and re
ligious uprising has succeeded. It
may be antl-clerlcal, but It Is not es
sentially antl-rellgious. One cannot
doubt that the ultimate outcome will
mean distinct separation of church
and state and therefore good for
Spain.
Keep Your Word.
A man's word is his stock-in-trade,
and it cannot be broken without injur
ing his commercial standing. Many
good men grow careless of their word
and fall to see the importance of keep
ing it until they have suffered some
serious consequence. There are those
whose word is said to be as good as
their bond. Whether it is or not,
their word must be good, for the world
Is not easily deceived about such
matters.
Keeping one's word Is more often a
matter of habit than character. Good
men, with the best of Intentions, some
times become careless in respect to a
promise, a. statement or an engage
ment, and, while no harm is meant, it
might as well be, for one cannot hab
itually break his word without losing
his caste as a "man of his word."
Nothing is more essential in business
life as the element of confidence, and
confidence, after all, rests entirely
upon one's care in doing what he says
he will do. . This matter of personal
integrity cuts a larger figure In busi
ness than we are sometimes willing to
admit. It la one of the demands that
business makes of men to fulfill their
words. Let business learn to dlstruBt
a man's reliability as to his word and
it will soon discount bis liability as a
business man.
Men with very glaring faults often
redeem themselves in business by
scrupulously safeguarding the Integ
rity of their word. Young men enter
ing life in whatever capacity will do
well to give special heed to this fact
and all it means to them and their
future. You cannot "Josh" your way
through business. . You may do a lot
of other things, but one thing you
must not do is to throw away your
word. When everything else is gone
and that is left you have the nucleus
for another start, but if with your
financial failure your word also has
failed, your situation Is grave, indeed.
It is easy to fail in one's word, too, but
not so easy to repair the injury that
the failure entails. ,
A Jim Crow Law Decision.
The United States supreme court not
long ago made a ruling on a case com
ing up from Kentucky which seems to
remove the onus of the so-called Jim
Crow laws from the shoulders of the
southern states. This decision, which
affirms a ruling of the lower courts
that a railroad could lawfully maintain
separate compartments for the races,
may set a new precedent and anticipate
the ultimate outcome of the case now
pending from Oklahoma, at the same
time serving to simplify the whole sit
uation. In the Kentucky case a negro bought
a first class ticket' to go from Louis
ville to Washington, D. C, becoming,
thereby, an Interstate passenger, and
he took a seat in a car reserved ex
clusively for white people. When asked
to go to a car set apart for colored pas
sengers he refused, contending that
the Kentucky law making this distinc
tion did not apply to interstate passen
gers, and when forced to pass into the
other car he protested and afterward
brought suit for damages. He lost in
the trial court and again on appeal to
the court of appeals, and lost again be
fore the United States supreme court
But the interesting part of this de
cision Is that it does not depend on the
state or interstate character of the pas
senger, nor on a state's right to make
such a law, but rather on the rail
road's right to regulate its transporta
tion. The court holds that a railroad
has a right to make "reasonable rules
for the disposition of its passengers,"
and, quoting from an old decision by
former Chief Justice Waite, the court
says: "This power of regulation may
be exercised without legislation as well
as with it." It lays special stress on
the point that the reasonableness of
the regulation does not depend on
whether the passenger' is state or in
terstate. The court then adds thst the test of
"reasonableness" on the part of the
railroad regulations must be the same
as on the part of a legislature enacting
such a law, namely, "the established
usages, customs and traditions of the
people," and the "promotion of their
comfort and the preservation of the
public peace and' good order." Of
course with such a test the regulations
that go to sustain a Jim Crow law
down south would never be "reason
able" in the north, where the occasion
for such a law Is never thought of.
This decision coming from the high
est tribunal In the land would seem to
be of the most acute Interest to those
who feel themselves concerned In such
laws or discriminations. It it of In
terest to note, however, that the court
haa mentioned the necessity of the
railroads according "equal privileges"
to all passengers, regardless of color,
so thst the -separation of persons on
color lines may not carry with it the
subjection of the colored passengers to
poorer service or Inferior accommodations.
--- - - I
After all its careful solicitude for
Nebraska's political health, and par
ticularly for the success of the sena
torial candidacy of Charles O. VVhedon,
Collier's Weekly comes to us with the
Information that In our recenj prima
ries "for governor Cady, standpatter,
beat Aldrlch; for senator, Burkett,
regular, overcome Whedon (Insurgent,
but suspected of too great friendliness
for the railroads)." Passing over the
inaccuracy of the returna, we still pro
test against charging the defeat of
VVhedon up to suspicion of railway
entanglements. If Collier's had such
suspicions when It fronted for Whedon
it ought to have taken precaution to
verify them. The explanation, how
ever, is that thla comment we now
quote Is from the department devoted
to chronicling current events and not
from the page supervised by the polit
ical editor. We have had such
troubles ourselves, so we advise Col
lier's to get together with itself.
In the language of our old friend,
Lord Roberts, we regret to report that
the country probably will not get ex
cited over William Barnes Jr.'s pro
nunclamento that "hysteria is running
riot" through the land. Thla land is
not taking its directions as to how to
run from any man who confines his
labors for mankind to as small a state
as New York.
A religious journal asks the ques
tion, "Is the preacher an actor?" The
lesson is the "folly of making and
preaching sermons to catch admira
tion." Well, we will admit that there
is too much acting in the pulpit.
Th Real Teat.
Baltimore American.
Having stated emphatically what he will
do, the colonel might turn his attention
to telling- ua how.
Ha
I.velc for Crook.
New York World.
When evidence concerning $1,000,000 frauds
on the Illinois Central Is thrown Into the
Chicago liver and fished out by a house
boat preacher to confront the thieves, they
must think that the ways of providence
are mysterious.
Reviving: mm Old Or4r.
Baltimore American.
The Nature Fakers' club and the Ananias
club, have now been reinforced by the
foundation of a new one the Old Foesll
olub. Aa Its first members are Judges of
the supreme court, th pang of membership
ought to be considerably soothed for later
possible appointees.
A Horal Bluff.
Cleveland Leader.
The kaiser reaffirms his absolute belief
in the d4vlne right of kings to rule or at
least the divine right of the king of Prus
sia, who happens also to be the emperor
of Germany JuM when there Is more doubt
than ever ' whether kings have any right
whatever to their thrones.
Some Athlete Cam "Come Back."
Boston Transcript.
It looks aa though the veteran athletes
bad set out to abolish the age limit. Ed
ward Payson Weston and John Ennls led
the way In pedestrlanism. and the match
race between James H. Riley and James
A Ten Eyck waa rowed In time that oars
men of half their years would be prowl to
duplicate.
Going; Bark m I. was; Way,
Boston Herald.
Quotations from Jefferson's Inaugural
address find a place on th back cover of
the democratic campaign book for 1910.
Thus they are as far removed as they
well could be from the record of a party
that under Bryan haa gone a long way
from Jefferson's Individualism and "least
government, best government" creed.
Ckeer t'n, Har Fverlte I
New York Tribune.
It Is now believed that hay fever Is
caused by th pollen of golden rod and
ragweed, and th theory has led to ex
periments aiming at the preparation of an
antitoxin from the offending material.
Though many of the victims of the dis
order dlvplay a cheerfulness worthy of
Mark Tapley, there Is a chance that they
may soon secure the relief that comes
from an efficient remedy.
Harmon ssa Hirmoar,
New York Sun.
Colonel Bryan, having announced that
h will not be a candidate for president In
1813, Immediately declared that Judson
Harmon ot Ohio cannot have his support
for the democratic nomination. The public
may expect to hear from Fairview here
after that all the other democrats who
are mentioned for the nomination fall to
meet the Bryan requirements. At the
same time, the unsuspected qualifications
of unheard of statesmen will be sung the
Nebraska seer, as was th case In the
months preceding the democratla national
convention of UKM. The Bryan methods
are pretty well understood.
Our Birthday Book
September 4, IS10.
D. H. Burnham, th Ug Chicago archi
tect, was bom September 4. 1848, at Hen
derson, N. Y. He commanded world-wide
public attention through the architecture
of the world's Columbian exposition, which
he supervised and assembled.
Luther L. Kountxe, vice president of the
First National bank, la just 36 year old
He was born here In Omaha and educated
at Yale. He started In at the bank In 167
at the bottom, as a clerk. In order to
learn th business In all Its phases.
Frank L, Campbell, th hustling llf
lnsuranc man, waa born September 4, ISM,
at Balnbridg. O. Me is a special agent
for the whole western country for the
New York Life, and came within an ace
of winning the prlx last year for writing
the biggest amount of Insurance of any
agent of the company.
James H Wlnterstnen, contracting agent
for th Standard Bridge company. Is M
years old today. He was born at Harrison
ville, O., snd traveled for W, T. Seaman,
wholesale stationer of Omsha, way back
in the early 80's, and for other In th
tarn lln sine then.
SECULAR SHOTS AT PULPIT.
Baltimore American: A religious conven
tion haa denounced aerial veneris as "hell
ish." This Is strange, aa by their very na
ture they ir uplifting.
Chicago Rmorrt Herald: One of the minis
ters candidly announces that automobile
scorchers have no chance to go to heaven.
But there are probably no automobiles In
heaven, anyhow,
Chicago Toet: A Chlrago preacher has be
come a musical comedy star and his wife
has Joined the chorus. Just because they
wanted more money. This, probably. Is an
other result of th Increased cost of living.
Springfield Republican: Giirnsex a to the
number of religious sects In the t'nlled
State, as counted by this year's census,
Indicate that we hav loat none of the old
ones and hav gained many new ones since
190i). No country In th world breeds re
ligious sects like America.. It almost Is like
raining bananas In th tropic.
Ban Francisco Chronicle: The action of
the Canadian Methodists In abolishing the
specific restriction In regard lo amuse
ments, such a th forbidding oi ita mem
bers to dance, etc., and substituting a fun
eral requirement of good conduct consistent
tth Christianity, Is an evidence of broad
ening views wlthtn that body. Church regu
lations which the church member as a
whole 'never think of observing, can serve
no good purpose.
CRITICISM OK THE (UIOMCL.
Small, bt Select t korii Working th
Old Sonar.
Nw York Tribune.
Th critics of Colonel Roosevelt they
are In full chorus now, a small but emi
nently select chorus, with th complaint
that be has nothing new to sav. And
then they make that criticism perfectly
destructive by saying nothing new them
selves. They repeat the same Id criti
cisms that have been, heard ever sine
the Icolonel emerged from relative ob
iourity, just to show, we supnox, bow
great a store thy set upon originality
and freshness. He utters platitudes. He
has not outgrown th Ten Commandments.
He use th first person singular pronoun
to a degree that offenda persons of taste.
He Is Insincere, for hla critics wot of ac
tions of his that ar Inconsistent with Ms
words, and Inconsistency is an indisputable
proof of Insincerity. H love popular ap
plause. He Is a dangerous agitator. Ha dors
not think deeply.
We suspect these criticisms will have
the same effect they produced when first
heard, nearly a decade ago. They did not
deter the colonel then from furthering in
his own way the policies and nausea In
which he was Interested, and It Is absurd
to suppose they will deter him now from
contributing In hlsown way to the success
of what have come to be called "progres
sive principles." He woulA have to bo
about It In his own. way or not at all. and
if he bad any real Interest in the re
forms and Ideas with which his name
hau been associated and which President
Taft administration has developed so ef
fectively he could not be expected to aban
don them now. And the criticisms will not
deter the thousands who are now throwing
their hats In the air in hl honor. They
never did. aud it is too late to suppose
they ever will.
Still, there Is reajson enough, why the
criticisms should be uttered. They af
ford great comfort to a select class of
persona, for not to approve, or to give
only a qualified approval, to the colonel
is a mark of distinction. It sets you
apart from the common herd, with Us
love of moral platitudes and Us incapacity
for distinguishing between them and deep
and original thought. Those who hav not
had an opportunity to teat themselves for
a year and a half navt enjoy the sense
of their superiority to th common run of
mankind.
P KARL 8 AltO THE WOMAN.
Wealthy ToarUt Caught with Duti
able Treasure.
Philadelphia Ledger.
The most remarkable chapter In the cur
rent history ot manners and (especially)
customs in America has Just been written
by a wealthy family of Poughkeepsle, who
made an effort to bring in a string of
pearls In the delicate architecture of a
woman's bonnet.
After the written and th supplementary
oral declaration that they had nothing
dutiable of the kind, a gold mesh purse was
discovered by the women inspectors. The
colored comic supplement of the news
papers are full of the sayings and doings
of the enfant terrible, who can be relied
upon for the embarrassing word or deed at
th critical moment. In thla case, U-y ear
old Helen piped up sweetly: "Oh, mother,
why don't you tell them we got It In Lu
cerne? I wanted you to do that at first."
The daughter has been very popular with
her mother ever sine.
But the most dramatfc scene was to come.
Th lady as she thought, surreptitiously
tore up a piece of paper, which th sleuth
hounds" of Uncle Bam put together again.
The mosaic offered Incriminating 'evidence
that there was a secreted pearl necklace
and besides, all unbeknownst, they had a
telegram from Florence putting them on
the qui vlve against the day of the arrival
ot the aforesaid Jewelry.
It Is very evident that these "society
smugglers" learned nothing from the lea-
son severely taught other arriving travelers.
as In th caa of ex-Oovrnor Rollins uf
New Hampshire, several months ago. The
law may be as onerous and as obnoxious
as it is asserted to be, but It la on th
statute books, and It la being stringently
enforced. Apparently It is almost as hard
for rich person to get through customs
heaven.
undutlable as It Is for them to get to
WOE FOR THE PLlHUKH,
What Will Happen to Hint When Thla
Goea Throogh.
Philadelphia Bulletin.
Mrs. Ella Flagg Young, head of Chicago's
school system, and nwly chosen president
of th National Educational assoclaUon,
has deolard war on the plumber.' It was
Mrs. Young who recently caused a buss
among teachers of penmanship by declar
ing sh didn't car how hr pupil held their
pens, provided they wrot quickly and leg
ibly. Now sh has determined to glv th
girls undor her command a nice Uttl
cour on "Why la a plumber's bill so
large?" and "How to aav a hard-working
husband's gas bill."
Like the kaiser's outburst on "divine
right," Mrs. Young's proposition sarves to
liven th waning dog days and create dis
cussion. It also brings to mind cooling
thoughts of frosen water pipes and bursting
spigots. But what of the plumber? If the
coming generation of Chicago housewives
learns how to repair a faucet without flood
ing the cellar and arousing a husband's
temper ther can b only on salvation for
th pip man; h will hav to turn plumb
ing Instructor and get on the public school
payroll!
RflUTfltlT A SnUIRES' COAL OFFICE
npriniirn Tn nin
iiciiiuwcu iu iu auuiti if in aincci
Our Hard Coal lo tho Scranton
Now Is the Time to Buy. Telephones; hug. 930; Ind. A-1 933
SEHMONS BOILED DOWN.
No virtue without vigor,
Difficulties glv reality to life.
Brotherly Donating holpa mora than sis
terly sympathy.
lou cannot put on nw lit without put
ting off th old.
No amount of cultur can make cameos
out of cabbag.
Facts In business count for more than
fvellnga In meeting.
No man la worthy of his part who Is not
Improving the future.
The Idler alwaye Indicts th stream for
flowing the wrong may.
Th only na who get ahead .'e those
who can go ahead alone. '
A man begin to die as soon as he cease
to see greater goals beyond.
Th poorest way to sen th Prtnc of
Peace Is to preach prejudices.
Some people never pray over their debts
till they e the sheriff coming.
The nail of a good precept always needs
the hammer of practice to drive It In.
No parent is doing his duty by his chil
dren who leaves any child without duties.
No matter hyw much you love you can
not afford to forget the courtesies of affec
tion. Chicago Tribune.
PERSONAL AND OTHERWISE.
Swell society of th globe-trotting kind
will not be truly happy until a mor gen
teel word Is substituted for smuggling.
Two-seated aeroplanes are classed as
extra, swell bridal gifts. They lusur th
customary awakening the morning after.
lit drawing attention to hlinsnlf and his
Ideas, the "contributing" editor haa "Old
Subscriber" and "Vox Papuii," beaten to a
frar.il.
Christmas Is less than ' four months
away, and th big vacation a scant tari
mouths. To your books, kids, and quit
kicking.
Coney Island Is to be redeemed and purl
fled and "short change" artists put out of
business by the authorities. The fact that
the season la over helps some.
In the opinion of expert reviewers,
Japan's explanation of the act ot Shov
ing Korea off the map la the finest brand
of summer fiction on the market.
Eight thousand Bowsers had a family
reunion in Pennsylvania and ZU Tons In
Chicago. Measured by newspaper attention
the Ton beats the Boasers In weight and
A New York court la asked to do(d
whether the word "Slob," applied to a
woman. Is a term ot endearment or ground
for breach of promise. Tue question will
hold the court for a while.
Great la advertising. "Oh. You. Kala
maxoo. My Looloo!" A vaudevllla song
plpd around th country, helped to put
the Michigan town right on the list f
population gainer.
A railroad company haa brought suit
against a Chicago drummer for Ut 13, un
paid railroad far, putting up 13 as a
tiling fe. The company doean't care for
th money, but 1 running hot toot for the
principle Involved.
The assessment board of review of Lak
county. 111., while In doubt about the valu
of $20,000 returned on the country home of
J. Ogden Armour, were escorted thereto
by th owner, shown over the ground and
through th blldlnga and dined meanwhile.
During tho after-dinner chat Mr. Armour
voluntered a motloa thai the assessment
be lifted to $W0,0W and It carried unani
mously. DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES.
Maude I hear that Charlie deliberately
picked a quarrel with his lance.
Claude Y, h said he siinpiy had to.
Wanted to stop buying flowers tor awhile
so he could pay ills tallir. tlaiper s
Baxar. i
"John," aald his wife, "I hav lots of
things 1 want to talk to you about."
"That s good," answered Mr. Spenders;
"generally- you waot to talk to ua about
things you haven't got."
Figg Talking, about pugilism and stata
lawa, did you ever notice it?
Fogg Kver notice what?
Figg That ther no law to prohibit
fiahtlna- In th Hut. nM tutrtmnnv
villa Courier-Journal.
"Tour wife's a judge of human nature,
isn't she?"
Judge She's a prosecuting attorney I
Cleveland Leudr.
"Mre. Climer's entertainments with suoh,
a good chef as she has, ' have become very
popular."
"1 suppose that 1 why her daughter is
such a dinner belle." Baltimore American.
Daughter Mother, could I lov two men
at the saro time?
Mother Not It on of tbem gets Wlso
Princeton Tiger.
"Reginald, I'm awfully sorry, but papaj
say ha doesn't want to sea you coming
here any more."
"Boadlcea, your father's wish Is law.
He aha 11 not see m again If 1 can help It.
What evenings In the week does he spend
down town'.'" Chicago Tribune.
"Did any girl vr propose to you?"'sli
asked. '
" Y. On."
why didn t you marry her?"
"I would not think of marrying a girl
who proposed to me."
Then she drew a deep sigh and said no
more. Chicago Record-Herald.
CAUSE FOR HOPES' YET.
S. E. Klscr In the Record-Herald.
Last Sunday night a week ago
We had a preacher her
' Who aald that Kate was layln' low
To rob ua of all ohaor;
H shook his flats with all hla might.
He made the air look blue
And frowned aa If he'd like to bit
A nail or two In two;
He slammed the Blbl ahut and said
Tho world was ail upaet;
He scared th people gonerle.
But still, somehow. It seam to me,
There's cause for hopin' yL
The wrath of God wan something which,
He spoke about a lot;
He told u how the wicked rich
To grief would noon be brought;
He told us earthquakes and th Ilk
Were comtn' thick and fat
To show us how the Lord could strlk
When He was roused at last;
H told us of a hundred sign
That showed that God was sot
On wreckin' think" and spread! n wo;
I haven't quit bllvln', though,
There's cause for hopin' yet.
I will admit that things sometimes
Appear to be all wrong;
The rr who keep commlttln" crimes
Get punished right along.
While rich men break th laws and fall
To hav to pay th price.
Or, If they do get sent to Jail
Are treated mighty nice;
I'll not deny that ther la much
To maka us fume and fret;
No, things sln't perfect her below;
I can't, somehow, help thlnkln', though,
There's cause for hopin' yet.
Th storm blew down my com last
week
I'll have no rrop this fall;
But I ain't hardly got the cheek
To think Ood planned It all;
It may be that I haven't trod
Th way that's always right,
But still I don't believe that Uod
Is wreckin' crop tor spite;
There's some folk who hav too blamed
much.
And some with hunger fret.
But, looktn' at It gensrlee.
I must say that It seems to m
There's cause for hopin' yet.
nniiTii iirn pxnrrT i
