Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, May 18, 1910, Page 6, Image 6

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    THE BEE: OMAHA, WEDNESDAY. MAY 18, 1910.
'Hie umaiia Daily Bee
FoUNLfcU CI EDWARD ROSE WATER.
VICTOR ROHK WATER, EDITOR.
Entered at Umalia postofflct aa second
class matter.
TERMS OB subscription.
inlly (Including Kunday), per week. lie
l'aily Ilea (without Suii.iavi. Dvr week..luc
J 'ally Km (without tjndy), one ear..$4o
Daily live and (Sunday, one year .(M
DELIVERED BY. CAKK1UK.
Evening Ilea (without Sunday), per week. So
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Sunday Die, on year -W
Saturday lee. one year 1-60
Addreaa all complaints of lrreguluiHl in
delivery to City Circulation Department.
OFFICES.
Omaha The Deo building.
fcoulh Uinaha Twenty-fourth- and N.
Council limits 15 ott Street.
Lincoln ,1s Little liuildlr.g.
Chicago Ijii Marquette Uuildlng.
New York Rooms liUl-110 No. 34 Waal
Tlnrty-tlilrd (street. .,,
Washington lib Fouiteenth qtrcet, N. W.
CORRESPONDENCE.
Communications relating to news and
cditoriul matter ahould be addressed:
Jinan bee, Editorial Department.
'REMITTANCES.
Remit by drull, express or postal order
payable lu The Jleo Publishing Company,
only 2-cent iiampn received In payment of
mail accounts. Personal check", except on
Omaha or custvrn exchange, not accepted.
STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION.
Btata of Nebraska. Douglas County, ,-,.
(icoi'KW D. Tzchuck, treasurer of The
Re Publishing Company, being duly sworn.
mk that the actual number of full and
complete copies of The Ial!y, Morning,
Evening and Munday lice printed during the
month of April, WIS. was a followa:
1 , .43.SOO 1 43,730
i 42,910 J 7 a.aoo
3 ,...48,100 ll 43,360
4 44,400 19 43,680
6 ,...42,770 20 43,660
4U.840 SI 4S,80
7 ,.,..43,600 12 48.030
S 48 090 2 43,100
43,060 24 41,400
10 44.BC0 ii 43,840
11 43,640 ! 43,830
12 43,660 ST 43,600
II 43,600 St 43,690
14 43,683 St ...43,760
1 43,700 BO 43,670
Total 1,384,340
Returned copies 10,431
Net tout 1,274.119
Dully average 43,470
UEORQIS . TZSCHUUK.
Treasurer.
Subscribed In my presence and aworn to
before ma tela 2d day of May, 1910.
If. P. WALKER,
Notary public
Subscribers leaving; taa tllr tem
porarily ahould kavt Tha Be
mailed to them. Addrcaaca will
changed aa often aa requested.
May day picnics have long ago gone
out of style.
With Dr. Hyde It was a case of
"Hoist with his own petard."
Anybody el bo in the city hall want
an assistant to do hlg work for hltn?
Strawberries have really made a bet
ter fight against the comet than straw
hats.
After all, one of the surest ways to
get peace Is to speak softly and carry
a big stick.
The TelephOnevtrust still complains
of a scarcity in hello girls. Why not
raise their pay?
It has remained for a Californian to
take refuge in a comet-proof cave.
Where is Kansas?
They may crown him with their for
eign titles all tbry please, but to us
he la still "the colonel."
Of course, if Mr. Bryan prefers to
talk for prohibition in a brewery an
nex, that is his business.
Wonder if our local weather man
docs not know that the coal in the bin
has long since disappeared?
Atlanta makss much of its desira
bility as a place of residence, but some
how Charles W. Morse does not like it
there.
The Chicago man who leaped to
death from the thirteenth story of a
building doubtless thought the twelfth
was not unlucky enough.
A Baltimore packer declares that
oysters that have been in cans for nine
years are good. Let him show his
sincerity by eating them.
If that llaytian Voodoo had only
thought to come to the United States
with his comet pills he might have
found a much larger market.
Lincoln and Waukesha have two
things in common their mayors are
both named Love and they are noted
for water the cities, not the mayors.
The Ak Bar-Ben Initiation team is
beginning practice. Prospective Ak
Sur Ben initiatives who are wise will
take notlco and undergo physical ex
amination. 'if there is a fight to be put up
against the proposed increase in rail
road freight rates throughout the west,
count Omaha shippers being in on the
firing lino.
Charles W. Morse is elated at the
acquittal of F. Augustus Helnse, which
was to hove been expected, and his
faith in his ultimate release from
prison tias been strengthened.
The Juror who cast the deciding
vote to convict Dr. Hyde on hla own
testimony must have been thinking of
the scripture, "But those things which
proceed out of tho mouth come from
the heart; and they defile the man."
The World has it figured out that
"what New York needs is a demo
cratic administration at Albany," ad
ding that the present one "is drunk
with power." With the Honorable
Flngy Connors, or the Right Honora
ble Charllo Murphy, at the bead of
things cna may well imagine that the
administration would not bo drunk, at
least not on power.
Awkward.
In coming to Omaha to tell how
democratic legislators are. betraying
the pecple by opposing his initiative
and referendum plan, Mr. Dryan is in
an awkward popltlon.
The triad of arch-tralfors heading
his list are the three democratic state
senators from Douglas county, who
have committed lese majeste by refus
ing to take orders from FalrVlew. No
one disputes the fact that these sena
tors are and have for years been no
torious corporation cappers, two of
them with previous malodorous legis
lative records. But notwithstanding
all that, Mr. Bryan during their last
campaign came here and pleaded for
votes for these three disreputables sim
ply because they had been nominated
on the same democratic ticket that
carried his own presidential electors.
Does Mr. Bryau know anything
about this delectable trio of which be
was not fully advised two years ago
when ho championed their cause and
went good for them? .
What have they done einco they
were elected to the legislature the last
time, that they were not expected to
do?
Is It not a fact that they were elated
for nomination by Mr. Bryan's political
managers for the express purpose of
getting the corporation and brewery
vote for the democratic ticket, with
out which Mr. Bryan would not have
had even the empty honor of carrying
his own state?
The cards In the democratic deck
are said to be stacked for the renomi
natloD this year of several members
of the discredited Douglas delegation
which disgraced us In the last legisla
ture. Will Mr. Bryan ask democrats to
vote for or against them if they are
nominated.
Or will he again shut his eyes and
hold his nose, and repeat his appeals
to "vote "er straight?"
To Clean Out the Cobwebs.
One of the first things President
Taft did after coming into office was
to form his cabinet into a budget com
mittee to scrutinize every item in the
estimates for government expenditures
as a step toward economy and soon
after he decided upon a thorough read
justment of the various departments of
the governmefft? The two moves
rightly go hand in hand, both making
for economy and progress. To carjyf
out this policy a provision has been
inserted into the sundry civil appro
priations bill authorizing the employ
ment of experts to do this depart
mental housecleaning.
It is to be hoped that the presi
dent's wish will be complied with by
congress and that this work may be set
on foot and completed without serious
delay. In some of the departments
methods are in vogue today which were
pursued in thel infancy of the republic
They are time wasters and money con
sumers, cobwebs that ehould be. swept
aside for modern businesslike pro
Cesses. -The president's plan, it is un
derstood,, contemplates an -expert for
each kind of work, one on whose spe
cial knowledge he may rely. He pro
poses to let these experts go into the
various departments and weed out
every form or method that is obsolete
or antiquated and supplant It with the
most modorn business system even if
in so doing a head or two falls into the
official basket, although that will not
be the main object of their mission.
Comet and Commerce.
Crop conditions are steadily improv
ing despite the comet. Scientific
measurements prove this to beT fact.
And as the crops always have an in
fluence on trade the latter is showing
greater activity than it did a fortnight
ago when the agricultural outlook was
not as good as it is now. Undoubtedly
crops, particularly wheat, have been
materially injured by the unseason
able weather, which most pcoplo are
prohe to attribute directly to Halley's
comet, giving it a commercial distinc
tion quite as great as its astronomi
cal, but the coming harvests if the
present forecasts based upon investi
gation, may be rolled upon, will not be
as poor as wao feared.
The east is showing a remarkable
degree of confidence and perhaps the
fact may be taken as indicating that
the United States is in a state of transi
tion from an agricultural to an in
dustrial country, for irrespective of
the farm, industries are displaying a
strength which not even the repressive
influence of the king's death has been
able to check. This condition Is en
couraging for the stability of general
business and points unmistakably to a
departure from the hypnotic spell of
the stock market, a change decidedly
for the better. The east knows that
whether any particular section of tho
west yields a normal crop, or. not, the
total will enable business to bold its
own and keep up with increasing de
mands.
Chautauqua Campaigning.
The Chautauqua was instituted some
twenty-five years ago as a system of
popular education, a means of extend
ing to the masses instruction best ob
tained in the academy, college and uni
versity and It comprised a course of
lectures in the summer and home study
In the winter. More recently the
tendency has been to transform It into
a public forum for private profit to a
very large extent, while the educa
tional feature Is lost sight of In the
commercial and political.
The practical benefit of the Chautau
qua as originally conducted was not
open to Question, but whether it is edi
fylng for political spellbinders to use
this powerful means of exploiting their
favorite nostrums before the public
may bo doubted, especially since the
price per lecture and future profits on
the Investment are the determining fac
tors. Lucky office-seekers have even
found this an easy means of making
their campaign yield financial returns
instead of being ft source of expense to
them as formerly.
But the most serious objection to
the Chautauqua as now conducted by
some of the syndicates Is not primarily
(hat It affords men opportunity for In
creasing their incomes, but that it de
grades the original function from
genuine education to agitation. The
influence of this must Inevitably be
felt upon the public mind. The shrewd
promoter is not enough concerned
about the gospel his circuit rider
preaches, as he Is over the question,
Can he hold an audience? Actual
worth Is too apt to count less than
horseplay for the gallery.
Banks and Emigration.
The heavy emigration of farmers
from western and northwestern states
Into Canada is being laid partially at
the door of western banks that have
loaned money extensively on farm land,
unintentionally fostering a baleful sys
tem of land speculation. The efflux
of farmers into the Dominion last year
was unprecedented and the banks have
come to realize that perhaps their
policy has had a contributory influ
ence. The fact is the man who owned land
in one cf these states has had ample
opportunity of selling It off to new
comers at fancy prices and he has
taken this money to Canada where he
could buy new land for a much smaller
flfiuro. But the objectionable feature
or the transaction is the stimulating
force to this emigration. Last year
103,789 persons went from the United
States to Canada, while only 67,930
came from Canada over the line, and a
large number of the American emi
grants were farmers, but the statisti
cian says that the rule has been for the
merchant and blacksmith with whom
the farmer traded to follow him across
the northern boundary.
A Chicago banker is authority for the
statement that many of the financiers
of the west realize their mistake in ob
serving so free a policy of loaning
money on farm land and that from
now on they propose to tighten up.
The last report of the comptroller of
the currency disclosed the fact that
bank loans generally in the west have
expanded abnormally in the last year,
but as all business has been in a
healthy condition this might be possi
ble and yet indicate nothing one way
or the other as to the wisdom of farm
loans.
Of course it will be necessary for
banks to continue a fair policy in this
respect in a country that is growing
as. rapidly as is the west and the deli
cate problem will arise in differentiat
ing between' land Speculation and legi
timate farm development.
Spirit of Decoration Day.
Mayor Busse of Chicago is the re
cipient of general commendation for
denying a permit for the Gotch
Zbyszko wrestle on Decoration day.
The day was not set apart as a holi
day for the selfish aggrandizement of
such i highly commercialized sports as
wresting, and it 1b not right that true
homage to patriotism should be capi
talized into dollars and cents by those
enterprises whose "squareness" at
best is seriously questioned. If the
promoters of these contests will not
willingly recognize the spirit of the
day, then it is time they were forced
to and it is the duty of those in official
positions to show them the light.
Nebraska is one of the states that
enforces the observance, or at least
prohibits the desecration of Memorial
day through legislative enactment and
its citizens do not regard it a hard
ship to turn aside from recreation one
day in the year to acknowledge their
debt to the soldiers of the civil war.
tt is Asking little enough of the Amer
ican people in the light of tho immor
tal blessings which these veterans be
stowed upon posterity to have them
devote one day in 365, to honoring
their heroes in war. .
The wrestlers ought to let this oc
casion teach them the lesson to go
slow in challenging public patience.
They have already pushed their busi
ness to the ragged edge of public tol
erance and if they do not exercise
more commoir sense professional
wrestling will reach the point of pro
hibition where boxing is In most of
the states.
What republicans, either regulars
or insurgents, may expect from the
democrats may be gathered from the
resolutions promulgated at the Furnas
county democratic love feast, which
attack Congressman Norris, the recog
nized leader of the house insurgents,
even more vehemently than they at
tack "Uncle Joe" Cannon. Demo
cratic ring leaders will always encour
age dissension within republican
ranks, but when the crucial point is
reached they always find some pretext
for gNlng preference to dyed-ln the
wool democrats.
Nebraska treamery men are oppos
ing any change in tho federal olco law
which would permit the marketing of
colored oleo by making the tax on it
the same as on uricolored oleo. Inas
much as we have a Nebraska law
which is absolutely prohibitive on the
sale of colored oleo, this state cannot
be so directly concerned.
aaMnmmmmHamManamBBaaaaammB
After classing Senator Butkett
"among the progressives" in its news
account of the White House confer
ence, the World Herald now tries edl
torlally to take it back and Insists that
the real progressives were not there.
In the definition of the World-Herald,
the only way to be a progressive re
publican is to join forces with the
democrats to fight the Taft administration.
The dor-lsion in the Omaha water
Works case already argued before the
supreme court of the United States has
not yet come down, and only one more
sitting of the court is scheduled before
adjournment for the summer. If we
do not get returns on the water works
case in the next batch of opinions
handed down the chances are that it
will be deferred at least until October,
as the supreme court seldom holds
special sessions.
Could Horace Greeley have bad the
range of Jackpots In mind when he ad
vised young men to go west? In
Pittsburg they start as low as $81, In
Illinois they get up to $900, while in
California they are said to run as high
as $25,000.
And still no one has told what has
happened to create an emergency de
manding an extra session of the Ne
braska legislature since last January,
when Governor Shallenberger publicly
declared that no such emergency
existed.
.1 Spectacle for the Gnda.
New York Pun.
The earnest solicitude of the democrats
In congress over tho possibility that all
the measures advocated by President Taft
may not be enacted is one of the most af
fecting incidents of a highly Involved
political situation.
' I
Activities of FeeelmUta.
Washington Herald.
Wo do not believe the new English
monarch should be judged too quickly. All
sorts of dire predictions were made when
Wllhelm II ascended the German throne.
But that strenuous emperor has more
than mada good with a big G.
Kicking; the w I'aranionnt.
8t. Louis Globe-Democrat.
After making prohibition a new "para
mount," Mr. Bryan now finds Nebraska to
be part of the enemy's country. This may
mean that ne will let somebody else get
the candidacy in 1912, as he did In 1904, but
ha may have something to say about the
nomination in 1916. He will be only C6 years
of age at that time.
When Grant Vna Abroad.
Boston Transcript.
When General Grant was In Berlin he de
clined a review tendered In hl honor. He
had seen so much of military life, and been
in so many pitched battles that such dis
play of mimic warfare bored him. He
avoided salutea by wearing civilian olothes,
and the officer of the guard at the Berlin
palace who was reprimanded for not ren
dering him the honors due his rank and
station excused himself by Baying that he
never imagined that the plain gentleman
who entered by the publlo gate was the Il
lustrious visitor.
Excessive Freight Hate.
Philadelphia Record.
The manufacturers of the country will
have the country behind them In their pro
test against an excessive advance in rail
road freight rates. 't The advances already
made by western' and New England rail
roads seem to bfc tout of'proportlon to the
advance of wages of employes which the in
creased freight and passenger rates are in
tended to offset. It Is all right that the
railroads should earn enough morrey to pay
their way. There should be no kick against
fair rates. The graat desideratum at the
present time is to secure from the railroads
an abandonment f secret rates and ar
rangements by means of which they un
justly discriminate between persons and be
tween places. As common carriers they
should sell their transportation at a com
mon charge for common service rendered,
ft Is the failure toCdo this that arouses just
resentment.
Talks for people
Another man who believes in qual
ity and in advertising it.
Louis G. -De. Armand, advertising
man in Davenport, la., in a letter to
Printers' Ink, ot January 26th, says:
"Two years ago tho Wm. C. H. Heuck
Company of this city decided to adver
tise a Wisconsin cheese under the
name 'La Finesse,' stamped al'
around tho rind' with 'La Finesse.'
"Of course this allowed for substi
tution for many months, but through
Eliort, right-to-the-point ads we havo
overcome this evil, and know that
buyers now look for the stamp on tho
rind.
"We did not' give -anything away,
usod no coupons, sent out no special
salesman nor canvassers. We just
relied on the papers here to get the
business. The copy was right, and we
have the business.
"That this campaign has been suc
cessful is evidenced by tho fact that a
fow months ago tho Heuck Company
opened another branch In Moline, III.,
and from the very start, with newspa
per advertising, has Jncreusert the s-iW
enormously, in this new territory. By
judiciousljt spending au average of $
a month in these papers we have in
two years caught the 'people' by the
palates and pocketbooks, and induced
thorn 'to buy and try La Finesse
cheese.' The 'people' wlij eat cheeso
If you tell them In the right way."
Mr. Merchant, tho 'people" of
Omaha will "buy and try" your goods
If you "tell them to in tho right way."
They will buy and try cheese, butter,
eggs, tea, coffee, clothing, 6Uoes, huts,
dresses, silk, satin, cotton, planus,
stoves, refrigerators, diamonds, gold,
silver, real estate and Insurance, and
they will "look for tho ttaiup on tho
rlud" if you will but tell them in
Uraiglit-to-tho point advertising about
your qualities.
You can reach over 150,000 "peo
ple" who want quality, In a four-Inch
space for50.96 a month in The Bee
three times a week.
If you 'advertise your store lu The
Bee to 150,000 people you can safely
bank on the fact that In due time
everybody will hear about you. Puo-
Washington Life
Bom xatareatlmf raaaaa
ana OaadtUana Oboarra
at she nation's Capitol.
A chunk of advice culled from the ex
perienced Senator Pepew and circulated
among the solons of Washington has some
value as a check valve for high feeders
elKewhere. The senator probably had at
tended more banquets than any ancient
now hobnobllng on the Sunset highway.
"Of course. It la fatal for any man to at
tempt to eat all the coursea and drink all
the wines served at a modern banquet,"
said the senator. "He should eat sparingly
and exercise discretion in drinking. First a
man should learn what wines he can stand
without disastrous aftereffects. Having
found something that he can drink safely
he should stick to it and refuse all others.
Some men can drink still wines freely,
while a single glass of sparkling wine will
knock them out and vice versa. The thing
for a man to do Is to find out If he can
drink ona kind of wine with reasonable
safety and try. no others."
Senator Depew at dinners and banquets
refuses cocktails, sherry and light wines
and drinks only champagne.
Senator Elkins, who Is engineering the
passage of the railroad bill through the
senate, refuses to be perturbed or even Ir
ritated In debate, reports the Washington
Times.
Insurgents or democrats may talk them
selves black in the face, may heap protest
upon protest, may t'harge and recharge the
senator's committee with bad faith, but the
great good humor of the West Virginian
never falls him. Ae a matter of fact, this
good humor Is the most dlsconceiting factor
In the railroad debate.
The other day Senator Dixon told the
senate that he had approached Senator
Elkins and asked him what rights a cer
tain amendment had.
"Why, we have tha votes, my boy, that
Is all there Is to It," Senator Elkins la re
ported to have replied.
"Can't you take a joke?" Senator Elkins
asked tha Montana statesman, when he
rose to explain the matter to the senate.
Occasionally some insurgent baits the
West Virginian Into a rejoinder on the issue
of tha railroad bill, but this is the excep
tion. One In a while a democrat provokes
a spirited rejoinder from Senator Elkins,
but this is even less often.
At a request of Postmaster General Hitch
cock, Senator Penrose, chairman of the
senate committee on postofflces and post
roads, has introduced a bill providing that
after December 81. 1910, letter carriers In
cities shall deliver mail only to those
houses which at provided with reeepta
cies to recflva letters and papers.
tietter carriers waste about one-half
their tima in ringing door bells and watt
ing for some one to come and take the
mall. Consequently If every house Is pro
vided with a mail box or a slit in the
door a carrier can cover about twice as
much territory as he does now. The coat
of providing houses with these receptacles
will prove very slight, and they will result
In lessening the danger of losing letters.
Judge Walter I. Smith Is not only one of
the best debaters In the house, but he Is
also a stumper from way back. When he
is doing his turn on the hustings, relates
the Washington Post, his audiences are al
ways large and enthusiastic. More than
that, the Judge himself becomes so enthu
siastic In his subject that he Is oblivious to
many things that happen.
' The judge usually wears a frock coat
and a string tie in his make-up. lie car
ries his handkerchief in one of the coat
pockets, in the tall of the coat. He had
started off to speak In the town hall one
night and found that he had no handker
chief. Rushing upstairs he grabbed a nicely
folded white object out of the bureau
drawer and shoved It Into the accustomed
repository of his kerchief. When the judge
had use for his handkerchief he reached
around to the pocket, and, drawing It forth,
would shake It sharply, causing It to snap
like a whip.
In the midst of his speech on the night
in question, he got excited and the per-
who sell things
pie have a way of passing along good
news.
The fact that your advertisement
appears continuously in a reputable
newspaper stimulates public confi
dence. ' Your shop advances step by
step in the estimation of tens of thou'
sands of people who may be months
getting around to make their first pur
chase. Y'ou can talk to 150,000 people any
day of the week through The Bee and
make your talk as personal as you
wish. You need not employ an inter
preter or use a megaphone. Simply
talk. That's all. Be sincere about it.
Let your words ring true. People will
listen. They like it.
Spend thousands a year on rent and
electric light and experienced sales
men and then squeeze out a niggardly
hundred or two on advertising; on
telling the people that you have the
store and the goods and the salesmen,
til hanging around waiting. A retail
shop that spends $5,000 a year on
rent ought at the very lowest estimate
spend $10,000 a year on advertising.
Your advertising is not a thing
apart from your enterprise. It is
your enterprise; a contagion which
you yourself create and which, If thor
oughly spread, is as enduring as the
everlasting hills.
Wallace C. Richardson, the well
known farm paper representative, re
cently advertised for an office boy. The
ad specified that he must be of good
family, living at home and must have
had a good school education.
The Richardson folk 6orted the re
turns in the usual blase manner until
they struck this:
"From the tone of your ad I gather
that you want some sweet little mam
ma's boy to work for $4 a week and a
five spot on Christmas. But If you
want a live wire with a real ambition
to learn the advertising butiness one
who will stick his nose In everyone's
business and ask questions until he
finds out what he is after, I am that
fair-haired boy,"
Ho did not get the job; which let
be a solemn example to all factious
and flippant advertisers who think
tUty are terribly smart1
spiratlon flowed freely. He reached for the
handkerchief, drew It out and gave it a
lsh outward with a crack. '
He mopped his massive brow, but the
thing seemed stringy and torn. After he
had dried his face sufficiently he returned
the supposed handkerchief to his pocket,
hot noticing the titter that was going
around the hall.
When he got home Judge Smith said to
his wife, "I wish, dear, you would be care
ful and leave ragged handkerchiefs out of
my bureau drawer."
"Why, there were no ragged handker
chiefs in your drawer."
"There weren'tt Ixxik at this one." ,
"That Isn't a handkerchief, you simple
ton; that Is a white string tie."
The Judge had, In his hurry, grabbed
up one of his white ties Instead of a hand
kerchief. Congress appropriates annually HOG. 000
to furnish veterans of the civil war with
artificial limbs If they need them. The
appropriation was first made In 1891, and
since then the government has spent H,
300.0W) in that way.
It la now proposed to give to old soldiers
their hearing that Is, artificial hearing,
If needed. To that end Congressman Sher
wood of Ohio, who Is himself a general of
that war and one of the few civil war gen
erals now In congrers, and in addition is
deaf, has Introduced a bill In congress. The
sum of 15.000 la appropriated by his bill for
the purchase of electrical devices for deaf
soldiers. The sum of $25 Is authorixed for
the purchaso of a suitable instrument and
(TiO for an acoustic instrument of greater
power if the surgeon general of the United
States, In hla discretion, thinks one ought
to be provided.
The other day Vice President Rherman
stole away from the capltol and disap
peared in one of the rooms of the senate
office building. Inadvertently a newspaper
man, a friend of the vice president's, step
ped Into the room and discovered the
statesman4oslng before a sculptor all the
time sound asleep In' his chair.
It seems that a bust was being carved,
and It Is said that it is destined for a niche
In the senate chamber, but, whether or
not, the vice president could stand the
strain of a two hours' sitting In rigidity.
That Is to say he didn't stand it, for he
was peacefully napping, according to the
newspaper man's story, and he slept right
on until the sculptor dismissed him for
tha day.
The sculptor, who happened to bo a
woman, didn't seem to mind. She oould
study vice presidential features in repose
as well as In activity. It didn't matter to
her, so she chiseled along while "Sunny
Jim" dreamed of the base ball gam he
will see aa soon as tha railroad bill is
passed.
Our Birthday Book
Max 18, 110.
James Hamilton Lewis, lawyer, states
man and orator, was born May 18, 1806 at
Danville, Va. Mr. Lewis was a member
of congress from Washington, and later
transplanted himself into Illinois politics.
He has orated once or twice in Omaha.
James C. Hemphill, veteran newspaper
man familiarly known as "Deacon," Is
Just 60 years old. His birthplace Is Due
West, S. C. His newspaper fame was gained
as editor of the Charleston News
Courier, and ha has recently become editor
of tha Richmond Times Dispatch.
Josephus Daniels, democratic polltlcan
and editor of the Raleigh (N. C.) Daily
Chronicle, is celebrating his 48 birthday.
He helped manage the democratic national
campaign which culminated Mr. Bryan's
third defeat.
George E. Prltchett, attorney-at-law offl
clng In the Merchant's National bank
building, was born May 18, 1841 at Vtlca,
N. Y. He Is a graduate of Hobart college,
and has been practicing law since 1803.
He is a union veteran and was also United
States district attorney for Nebraska un
der the first Cleveland, administration.
Edward F. Schurlg, electrical engineer
and president of the Standard Electrical
company, was born May 18, 1863, In Ger
many, where he received his technical ed
ucation. Mr. Schurlg was city electrician
for Omaha for nearly ten years, resigning
in 1903 to practice his profession on his
own account.
A ad Move an Amendment.
Chicago Record.
While the astronomers continue to assure
the publlo that there is no danger from the
tall of the comet, It may be Just as well to
cast a hurried glance over your past life.
ran
WANTED 100 Used Pianos
We would like to get into communication at once with 100 fam
ilies having good pianos, which they would like to exenange for
APOLLO PLAYER-PIANO
Tou may have had an opportunity to exchange your old piano for
an ordinary new piano, but you may never have bad a chance; to ex
change for the Apollo the greatest player piano made.
APOLLO PIANO
is the original 88-note player piano. The 88-note Apollo has 8 years
the start of all other player pianos of like range and it represents an
advance of eight years in Improvements over all others. It is alone
in its class.
These Features in tha Apollo Alone
The Apollo enables you to play a larger selection ot musical com
positions than any other player piano in the world.
The Apollo is the only player piano made in which the pneumatic
fingers touch down on the key in front of the fulcrum, giving the real
"human expression."
The Apollo is the only player piano with, the transposing device,
which enables you to transpose and to play a composition in any de
sired key to suit any voice or instrument.
Tho. celebrated Melville Clark Piano, in which the Apollo action
la placed, is an artistic Instrument. No better piano is mada.
FILL OUT THE COUPON and mail It to us. Be sura to put In
the make of your Instrument.
A D08PE CO., OMAHA, NEU.
, I desire information looking to the exchange ot my piano
for a new Apollo Player Piano. The request puts me under no
obligation whatever.
My Piano is
(Name ot Instrument.)
My Name Is.,.,
Address
a. HOSPE CO.
15131615 Douglas Street.
PERSONAL NOTES.
The driver' of a coal cart hns been fined
2T for delivering a woman tHl pounds o'
ctxl lesa than she paid for. It la time
for the Ice man to ihlver.
Astronomer who hava been scratching
the comet's head with the spectroscope, a
prlsmaUc fine-toothed comb, find a trifle
of cyanogen there, but no more than a
healthy comet needs to keep It active.
Miss Matilda Townsend, who Is soon to
be married to Teter U. (irry In New
York, has Imported a 15.000 wedding
gown. In order to out any figure at t
wedding Pete will have to wear a suit that
cost at least $.
r'rank Tomakl of nioomfleld, N. J., says
that Just as he was hauling In a hlg
eel, John Krita pushed him Into the Mor
ris oatial. The eel atruok him In tha f.ua
with Its tall, he got entangled In tho Una
and the hook caught in his thumb, but
when he got out the eel was In his ooat
pocket.
Frank Day of Jonesvllle, N. C, la the
champion mall carrier of the state. Ilia
route Is twenty-five miles long und In the
forty-five years that ha has befn in tha
service he has traveled 87, MS miles, lie
never lost a mall lock, was never more
than fifteen mlnuts behind schedule time,
and more than half the trlpA were made
on foot. Mr. Day Is 90 year- old. When
14 years old he lost his right arm.
The recent visit of Miss Anne Morgan,
the philanthropic daughter of J. P. Mor
gan, may result in the location at Colo
rado Springs, of the Home for Depend
ent Children, which she proposes to erect.
While there recently, Miss Morgan and
her party were not at home to society,
and the real object of her vjsit was to
study the climate and other paints that
recommended this as an Ideal location fur
such a home. , ,
SMILING REMARKS.
Nurae Doctor, the patient rallied a little
last night, and shows unexpected strength
this morning. He says he won't take any
more of that vile medicine.
Dr. Kallowmell Dear, . dear! We'll hava
to do something to get him out of that
condlton. Chicugo Tribune.
"Y'ou have sold everything except ona
cow end one pig?"
'"Yep," replied Farmer Corntossel.
"Why didn't you let them go with tha
rest?" . . t
"Well, we thought we ought to havo
some sort of a menagerie to keep the sum
mer boarders interested." Washtngtoa
Star. ,'
"When did you discover that you loved
ma, sweetheart?" he asked tenderly.
"When I found myself getting mad every
time any one called you a fool," she an
swered , bluntly. Buffalo Express.
"Who Is Jane to marry?"
"His name is Bridge."
"Good gracious, does she carry the crsse
as far as that?" Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"I saw a little Joke In an almanao today,
said the political boss. " 'where there'a.'a
will there's a way to kreak It.' " .
"Well." asked his lieutenant.
"Wall. It got me to thlnkln' about tha
'will of the people.' We'll hava to think
up a new way to break that." Cathollo
Standard and Times.
Lady ln the department store.) Do you
keep stationery?
Floorwalker No; madan, we continually
walk about. Life.
"Pop. tha emergency men of the revolu
tion wera supposed to be on tha spot in a
second, weren't they?"
"Yes, my son."
"Then when did' they call them the Min
ute Men?" Baltimore American.
THAT SHOW OF HALLEY'S.
While yet deep darkness lingers.
ivong. long Detore 'tis oay.
The alarm clock's clatter aummont
Sleepy folks to the matinee;
The spectators assemble
In gowns oh. that's enough ' " '
I shan't go Into details
In regard to style and stun.
With Venus for a footlight.
Father Rlgge In the box,
An orchestra of roosters,
And a pit full of toweled locks.
What an inspiration It must be
When no curtain interveneth
For that star to throw her searelillgh'
Far up unto the senlth.
The view we get is splendid,
Unspoiled by hats ornate.
And that chantlcleer-leal orchestra
Makes It proper and up-to-date.
We think a hoap of Halley's
She's worth no end of fuss
But wouldn't It make good readln'
What Halley's thinks of us?
But when the scenes are shifted.
And Halley In the west.
Gives her evening performance,
We must try to look our best
I wonder when the curtain lifts
Her evening stunt to-show us
I wonder, oh, I wonder!
Will Halley's comet know us?
Omaha. -BAYOLLNBTRELE. '
H
I