miE BF.E: OMAHA, FT? T DAT, AFIUL 1.", 10m. The Bee's Home Magazine Page of Special Features TllO T.rv1 Hftcinocc auv Aitwu 1Uwlilvww By. Walter. A. Sinclair. "80 Cincinnati' aldermen decided not to et the clock ahead an hour till summer?" commented Friend Wife. ' "Yea. the alarm clocks struck, but they wouldn't strike an hour too early." said -the tlrd. business man. 'The great day ' Ugh servlNg plan- waa a total Iom. They couldn't convince the ultimate consumers of daylight that a sunbeam saved waa a lu beam . earned. The Ohio city was worked up to quite a ferment about It, but not yeasty enough to rise early. ."That was one of the shlnest schemes ver attempted In this country. Of course. 1 mean sun-ahlnest. There was a- chance to inaw an awful hole In the profits of the lighting companies by getting the en f tire population up first an hour earlier and UUr on two hours earlier. The schemers played on the hope that human nature only . objected to getting up early becauiie all otheis were snoozing, and that every one who got up at ,7 would be willing to hop out ' at 6 If the neighbors were around. But It seems that the population of Cincin nati would rather be up on a lark at night ' than up with tho lark. "I supposed this Chantecler erase would give a terrlflo boom to the sunrise awak ening Idea, Bat apparently a bird on the , ' hat Is not equal to two crowing In the 'y-back yard at daybreak. I guess the only people wfp were strong for this new plan were the night watchmen, who thought they'd have a shorter trick. The people , who stay up all night having a good time and retire about the time ordinary people go to , work wore against It, because It would mean that they would have to go to sleep, two hours earlier. . I'You .didn't hear any loud roars for a longer. -day from the people of the tene ments, who sleep on the roofs in summer. The. day comes to them all too seon, they think, and they often wish that jocund Aurora, tripping over the eastern horlson on pinky toes, would occasionally trip the same pinky torn a little harder on the horlson and fall over on her rosey nose (or . s. change. , . ' . . 1 "Nobody Is keen to have, a day begin, although we are usually glad to see night arrive. . Great men long for night. Look at Wellington, snapping his watch and ex- Correct Skirt Lengths , The correct lengths of skirts Is a prob lem tha frequently puzzles the home dress , maker. , Of course, with . tha street suit there - Is ,. practically no change, for the skirt will i . always, ba walking length as long as there 1,' ttt sensible women.. Skirts of spring suits, however., are usually an Inch or two longer -than those fat fall war, because tha ma . . ' ierlal la usually of a lighter tone and the .trimming a Mttle. moro "dressy" than the tYff.i- uwarnl fall nftxjA ..rlnln ,,lf wrA . course, ..weather conditions . being mora fa vorable, the skirt con be worn longer with out jretjlng bedraggled In bad weather. . - Tva Inches nhnvn the wreuioA jt Tl fiiviiinn ... is, tle oortet length for the skirt of a 1910 .spring tailored suit to be worn by a tall or a medium, sized woman. ' .- When tha wearer la short or stout, the 'j...ift ciii,tt)iiui .hid iiuvr u tftii mull UU1.V .. I will be far more becoming, especially If the fabric Is light In color. . III Antrim, latttrth. Thin np-unni, lkM tnr oiling too quickly around the bottom, and , . the shorter skirt In wash goods Is always -. trim.-looking. - . Separate skirts for 'outer wear are also amkla length. Tweeds, serges, linena and cotton (heavy) goods are the materials .usually 'developed Into what are termed y OutWig- skirts, although' there are other , : , Suitable fabrics, such as brllliantine, pop- tin, panama, etc. '" ' ' So much for the skirts for morning; wear. Those used on afternoon gowns display mall trains. This la no doubt due to the fact that . All Important . robca are mad with some kind of drapery attachment, '. ' " either, Id form, of tunics, overaklrt or pan nier eirecia, wnicnr necessitates ions un derskirts. If graceful results are to ba ob talned. The back of the skirt may be only four tncbes'upon tha floor, or may ba fourteen. Tha length depends chiefly upon the design . . W tho Costume. . .' .When a simple apron drapery or a short tunic forma tha overdress then the shorter length will ba sufficient, while the more The human body and industrial corpora tion stock from both contain 63 per cent water. k ' . Of the I.4E9 who died of heart failure In ' ' this country last year two held royal 'flushes In a raised pot; twenty-six received money unexpectedly when they most needed ' It; MJS played the stock market with all ' their worldly gooes ani won, and 131 asked for ah' increase of pay and got it. Research proves that the smallest men push the heaviest loads, while the big fel ' svs hold down the office chairs. A'cublo.foot of water Is a load for one niai. . A. cublo foot of near-whisky will make a load fpr forty men. Pure tlll-ale should assay not more than ten crots words, to the barrel. One of the most peculiar optical Illusions Is the fact that a small front yard looks . larger than the state of Indiana when viewed from tha rear of a dull lawn mower. . , Out of the ,J3t.Sl& halituta administered .. In this country last year thirty-seven were .cut, Jut as the patrona desired they should, - .'.'.. . Wild, eee fly in the shape of a V even on tha restaurant menu. The first green thing to ahow after the melting mow is tha labels oa the empty tin cans In the back yards. . It U a peculiar fact that the Chinese of this country forge their . English as soon as thy aje arrested and do not recover It until they are free again. IUlley' comet fust appeared In the news papers last October and will be visible In the magazines about the first of next May . north-byret of the rear advertising page. . The driest, thing- on earth la a Dutch plo - bJo oa a July day In a temperanoe town- The diamond Is so hsrd It will make a ' large' dent In the hardest heart. The beard grows at the rate of four shaves a week. ' It 1 a peoullar fact that the dollar bill Is lcager cocnlnji thaa going Ntw Twx Science Briefs. T.Tnn Tells Friend Wife That l'XUU - the Alarm Clocki Struck. "JOYOUS." . claiming for 'Night or Blucher.' Tha days are always breaking, no matter how well they're planned, but nights well, nights are bold, according, to the otd ballad. I'm strong for 'Lovely Night,' whether by opera orchestra, phonograph or piano. "Night la the time when song and hap piness reign. Sometime, when song reigns in the flat above, with about six Joyous singers stamping on tha floor, tha plaster also rains from the celling. Night la bent for tha voice, and we can prove It by the opera tenor who gets 13.500 a night for sing lng, and by the baritone cat who gets a clout over the head with a bootjack. Just think of all the glassware on night's mantle! "It Isn't day that ought to be lengthened, but the shades of night.' The pheasant asked Chantecler to keep tha sun from rlblng so early, but Old Sol, like all other elderly gentle-men, Is an early riser. And tha world la young. So who wants to hasten the morning grouch an hour of two houra earllerT" "The early bird, you know," reminded Friend Wife. "Foolish bird compared with the wise old night owl," said the Tired Business Man. (Copyright, 1910, N. Y. Herald Co.) Street Suits Should Be in . Bound Lenethi and Two Inches from Floor. an offset to fullness. A short 1 skirt and much looped draperies would be decidedly bunchy In effect and consequently lack grace. In the case of a simple double skirt that Is, two skirts of equal depth made from flouncing or material of one kind, each skirt finished In exactly the same way and arranged .on over tha . other tha lengths may be the same all the way around If preferred. .. This may be round length If for -house or formal wear, and may lust escape tha ground If the skirt Is to be - worn out of doors. .. ... .'Wbertthe drapery -Is , cut squ&r't across tho front at about knee' length and runs dewn to a point In center back, then a slight train is Imperative if the gown Is to ba a success. '... The skirt model that -exhibits a deep hem of a contrasting color will be trying to any but a toll woman' unless It Is cut with a light train, and as both tha walking length and tho longer one are considered fashion able In this particular style there Is no reason why one should choose an unbe coming length. The skirts of house gowns for morning wear just touch the floor all around, while those for afternoons show a little train in the back. A favored model In- the latter style is made with a double box-pleat down both back and front In panel effect, the former spreading Itself on tha floor for several Inches. The sides of tha skirt are smooth fltthig over the hips to about knee length, where they are met by a deep flounce. This style should prove beconjlnr to stout matrons, while more slender women will find the pointed draperies falling over slightly trained plain skirts equally ef fective. Evening and dinner gowns are all made with trains, but dancing frocks for girls and young matrons are seen In round lengths in a variety of models. Thl style of frock Is always popular during the sum mer season for evening Wear, because it oan be worn for informal dances and din ners and with, a gulmpe for festive, after noons. ELIZABETH LEE Fads for. Woman. While wings that are Only slightly soiled can be used again, and with extremely good effect, if covered with fine black Jet, powdered- with ' tiny jet. beads, gold and silver, bead are sometlmrjL used, but these seem more appropriate for evening than for day, and wings are not used on evening hats. s. Flowers, too, may be veiled With tulle this season, which simplifies matters for the home milliner. In fact, most of tho new millinery styles mar be -copied. For in stance, the small mushroom hat, entirely covered with tiny pink roses aown neatly and trimmed with a simple net biw, wired, will be easy to make. The new parasol handles are mounted with the heads of roosters and other feathered creatures, carved In wood. Ivory or dull metal. The handles are long,' several inches, In tact longer than those ued last season. Coverings are of taffeta and linen. Ex tremely good effects are seen In the com btnatlon of black and white check, with a color. Green, for Instance, is good, and to be. up-to-date the facing of the coat collar should match the border of the parasol.. Daily Health Hints. 'Ml 'J For sprains very hot water applied to thj Joint will bring relr, unless It ba a bal cane, when the hot water should be suc ceeded by cold evaporating lotions. For very (tight cases of this kind the best thing Is to apply a wt bandage, laying It on the Joint lightly and keeping It con stantly wet. Whan, the pain and swelling have subsided from th a treatment t'le Joint should be rubbed very giiuly with a 11 ii ment to produce friction. lt?fe wffHrTIs Hi Wis In . I sllslMHIf nlil I d Maklag the Best of It. I iin pra"3e a sudden thaw Wot feet may put in health a flaw, Nor do I I kt a sudden lr-ese On Ice I never wslk with t&ae. "Twist tbaw and Ice I aruuibllng swing And wall the cumUig of Uia airln-. ....... X. E. U. W DOLBYS NVjn DOLBY TRMMIHG r' feo HE CftH CTCHMtl ur-l II I ArtW IMSTRUCTIOM KEEP this rexvr PACE OP NlMHHAMsAA.t ?LrCrvENlMG MIS SPEED J DID LL HOW .TROT LOHG' Vfti i DROMISFID save the. I o I jtmj ... ltw poo fn nirt orricER ME A GOOD P05.TIOH rOR THI3-CO OM, a. . a. sV . r w - tuu r t TIME. iCOPlnluHT. ISia BY THE WfcW The Tale of the After he had been' gazing silently at her for a long time he drew a deep breath and aid: "The astronomers think the tall of Hal- ley's comet is going to brush, the earth." "Tea." she replied. "I wonder If Its likely to do any damage?" , -"They don't seem to be quite sure whether It will or not..' Most of them think we won't notice rc' . 5 v- ' 'I don't see how It could cause trouble. seeing; that It Is nothing but a transparent streak of corns kind that has n substance." "Still," he went on, after moving his chair a little closer to hers, "nobody can be absolutely sure about It. The thing may be composed of a deadly gas, or, even though It Is transparent. It may be sub stantial enough to wreck the earth. Glass and water are transparent, but they have substance enough to do great damage sometimes." "Oh, Harry I mean Mr. Marshall why do you wish td frighten me so?" ,- She moved her chair close to his and di The Dai VOL. I. . THE Bt'MBLG BKB. under a know, If A. 8T1NGER Editor some one. gestive around NO ADS AT ANY PRICE Bee as a ' Communications welcomed, and neither signature nor re turn postage required. Ad dress the Editor. NO BAD MONEY TAKEN. Oat of Hibernation. The Bumble Bee humbly an nounces that It la again out of hibernation, having had a restful retirement during the long winter months, snd re urns to make an occasional reappearance, but not promis ing to be a dally visitor for the preeet-.L The Bumble Bee extends greetings to Its eld friends and neighbors and hopes to renew acquaintance with them all gain with The Big Stick, with The Weskly Bunion, with the Gotham Gazette, with the BIngvllle Bugle, and we may even condescend to recognize Al Sorcnson's Examiner if It doesn't act too stuck up. , We shall be burning around htre off and fh and may, perhaps, collide with our ' cousin, the political bee, who. we hear. Is getting busy In a lot of people's bonnets. Wo thank our srsr that we are not so amUtlous, but are content to gather honey and let others chew the wtt. So, friends and neighbors. we salute you and Invite your kind attention. Come Oa, Ye Poets. uenue Minmrtime is once more In our midst, brlnsring with her the season when youthful fancy turns to poetry and love. We do not w.int to Interfere with tho lovo, but If the mime wlth'n you Is chafing to break out In verse that you think looks gooc. to you. why Just st-rd the poetry th's way and tho worst that can happen to It is -to fall Inte the wsste basket. Anyone can commit, poetrr If you feel so Inclined, and sometimes you d) your but when you feel your worst You may bo an In-glorious Shakes' (are with your light bidden Raid POP 13LE ft IS R F- WHAT- BCK ,TrDIMArTE DOLBY ? fan on - k , - 'l rzi. Mr, ill 1 II in. sm I II i - ' f i " ,a i.rj r i xr. "t i i t : t X. i t y II I . I.. I .ill TTV A 1 1 TT - I r v vow-rn PurriM WORSE THiM 1VDURE VESTERDrVr, ILeOCING HAVE TO SLOW DOWN A enr- VES THAMKVOUl DOUBLE VOU SVED ME FROM f LUMATIC TO w THE YOHlC 1IIHiH4 TStJSQRAM (NEW YORK rRALD81" Comet's Tail rected at him an 'appealing look that ought to have made him hasten to offer his pro tection. "I don't wish to frighten you," he re plied. ; "But I wish I knew Just what Is going to happen." v ,... She laid a hand gently upon one of his knees and drew, ft. soulful sigh. "I shouldn't yilnk," she said, "you would wish to know 1t(K there was to be a great catastrophe.' THlk of the agony we should have to endure'hllea waiting our doom If we knew the oomot was going to destroy the world." With a little shiver she nestled against him, as If she had possessed childlike con fidence In his power to protect her from harm. "Still," he Insisted, "If there's going to be a smash-up. Id like to know It In advance." "Oh! I wish you hadn't brought up the subject. I'm terribly frightened, iim afraid I shall not be able to sleep at all to night." One of her small, soft hands crept shyly ffSTOP, 1 -1 vou I J 7 V ly &Ej mble Bee OMAHA. APRIL. 16, .1910. bushel for all you VERY LATEST NEWS Crisp . Items . of Interest Bed Hot Off the . Bee line. , you don't try It on With so many sug subjects running loose, and The Bumble shining mark. It's up to the poets to start something. WE HEAR That Mayor "Jim" would be willing to occupy a seat In the capltol even if it is not removed from Lincoln and Lincoln stays dry. That Stockton Heth has not been back to Kansas City since. That Frank Johnson still has a few sharts of mining stock he might be Induced to part with at what he paid. " That John L. Webster is dreadfully afraid he may get a final decision In the water works case this time. . That W. W. Cole would sell tickets on himself tor a raf fle If the right people would buy chances. . That doodley Brucker is In Sanger of having fame thrust More Speeches la g-Igvavt. NEW YORK, April 14. (Special to The Bumble Bee.) A wireless advises the ap proach ot steamship carrying W. J. Bryan and cargo of new Chautauqua speeches. Cus toms officers are in quandary as to wwhether to eolleot duty, ad valorem or by- the yard. Getting; In Practice. " BERLIN, April U- Special Cable to The Bumble Bee.) Emperor William has been as tonishing ths natives by un usual activity of !ate He has been chopping trees, shoptlng at revolver target. upon htm when the city coun cil elects Its new president. That Little Bismarck posi tively refuses to relinquish his place as "der ahudge" to go after a seat on the luprema bench. That Harrle ' Lawrle . Is chuckling over the fine sula he mado of hia auto to the fire insurance company. That Rev. Savldge is con fidently counting on the usual brisk spring trade at his bag gain counter matrimonial bureau. That H. J. Per.fold Is rot holding his head up to high while crossing the ooefin. That Would-Be Senator Sor enson will pass rhe hat soon to get together the coin for his filing- fee. That Dr. Hippie will In due time cut his eye teeth on that chloride of lime typhoid ex terminator, f playing tennis and riding hur dles every day. He says he expeots a guest soon for whose entertainment he Is prepar ing. Only a False Alarm. WASHIINQTON. April 11. (Special to The Bumble Bee.) A well defined rumor ' la afloat that Uncle Joe has re signed both the speakership and his seat In congress. LATER Resignation an unadulterated fake. And Still They Come. COUNCIL BLUFFS. Ia., April 14. (Special to The Bumble Bee.) Another Mike turned up here todiy and asked If be was too late to get his name on the roll of honor. Saya he would have got here sooner, couldn't stop running Jockey was killed. Try te Save The I'ses of Rellclea. To ue religion as a cloak. Our Indignation might pro voke; Rut rirls with not enough for that Can ue it for an Easter 'hat. LINCOLN. April H to The Bumble Bae.) state house offlc'als appearance this morning they ul surprised to find the cap The Bumble Bee. CUBS DO Mi rVSCTMTW . 1WMT TOAKE SOME fcPtrO THE HE XT TIME I SPRINT -tor TEH THI3 VOVJ MVJTi BEHIND nc wi t ri A WHIP nriD ir nv SPEED SLOWS DOWM SLe-.M ftwAV cst ME HO MeVTTER HOW MUCH I COMPLAIN - ir vou oeiv me fNTM 114-TRV TO GE T VOVJ t POSITION IN i 6 eViW .TOMORROW COODPeYf.SIR- - 1HAPPE.HED SeV- HOHEST PE Hi3iirni . AND NOTIC E.O orricER. WILD GWrRt HETOLD r-lETOOOlT 'I I OUCH' 1 IprricrR- IHHISi EVE-"t J .CAM VOVJ IM RON Al felahli llssetvedJ S. E. Kiser.in the Chicago Record-Herald. Into one ot his and stray strands, ot her liken halt- brushed his cheek. "Why," aha asked, after they had sat thus for a little while, "would you want to know It, .Harry t" "Well, .11 would. I'd give a whole lot to know t was coming before It happened. "But why? There must be some reason. .'.'.'if I ktiew -the world i was going to get smashed 'at a certain-' time there's some thing fd do just before the end came." "Oh. Harryl"What la it?" "If If I'Unew.'there was going to be a collision and they had It all figured out so we'd know Just when the crash - would occur I'd 'd " "Yes yes, you would what?" "I'd com to you just before the end and and kiss you!" After she had unwound her arms from about his neck and he could use his Hps for speaking again he said: "Gee, I hope the comet's tall won't do anything to upset affairs here now." NO. 182. ltol tied down with wire ropes faaterte'd" 'to' 'the neighboring telegraph poles. It Is under stood the-work was done dur ing the night by Lincoln busi ness .men who Will take no chances on losing out on such a good thing.. Bumble Bee stings are al ways the best. ADVERTISEMENTS. NOTICE. The Census Takers Are Coming .... Don't .die . or move away until after you are counted. C. L. SAUNDERS. ....... Supervisor. WANTED Agents to sell all the 'popular Songs of the day. "Him Dry I Am" "Little Brown Jug." - Sure to go like hot cakes in Lincoln and oBher towns In the drouth belt. Apply by mail'. Box 1313. TRADE EXCURSION Through South Dakota. . . .Th Boosters, some times knows as rain- makers, will start on another ' Junket next month. Raise the ante and you can get In on the game. Jack pots strictly limited. Make ' reservations at Secre tary's Office, Commer cial Club. ' ENOA CEMENT EXTRAORDINARY. Be it known to all Mikes that Mabray and his famous troupe of (bad) actors, who mado the biggest hit of the t-ann at Counslt Bluffs, where they last showed, have bonked for a long run under ths manasemrat of Uncle Sam at the new 1-eav-en worth. Come Early and Avoid the Rush. Prices According to What the Trsfflo Will Bear. rumor HELP! HKLP! HELP! t'nless some charitable person comes to my res. Cue with a handout I will have to cloe at I for ' want of monev to par my llKht b II. Come acruss quick or I must . go on a strike. The Postofflce Clock. but h after tha Capltol. PAT - -A" - TO') - ENTER. NEWKT THIVQ IN cHur.cnra. No v a't for th eon- "trlbutlon bn. Jf you don't like the srrmnn yon- can hit It to the door. -(Special When put - in No liwt'ons -Nor - Plugged 1 Aiousy iak.cn. SIDELIGHTS ALONG , WASIUNGTON BYWAYS "It does not take a new member of con gress long to realise that he does not create such a terrlflo commotion upon his arrival In Washington," said Representative John A. Kellher of Massachusetts. 'I am speaking from experience," added Mr. Kellher. who Is serving his fourth term from the Ninth Massachusetts district. which, by the way. Is a record for con tinuous service from the district. 'When I came down to Washington Im mediately after my first election to con- gress." said Mr. Kellher. "I felt It was up to me to uphold the dignity of the grsnd old commonwealth, not only at ths capltol, but In private life as well. I still think so. but I have modified- my views slightly. "I first lived at a hotel, but did not like to confine myself to one or two rooms and was not fond of hanging around the hotel lobby. I told my secretary to look around tne city and see If he could not rent a comfortably furnished house. Not until 1 signed the lease did I realise what I was up against. When I moved in with a couple of trunks I found that I was the temporary owner of about thirty furnished rooms. I was not troubled by a small army of callers and In desperation ordered my secretary to live with me. "The worst feature of my first venture In housekeeping was an Inheritance from the owners of the house. It seems that thy were Interested In cats. In fact, they had given Instructions to the city officials to turn over to them all the stray cats to be found In Washington. They gave them the best care, but, when I took the house, were compelled to distribute them to numerous families. Evidently the felines did not fare wall In their new- homes. Each night when I was pondering over the preparation of my maiden speech In the house I was disturbed by an army of oa.s yelling In chorus to get back to their old home. What with the nightly visit ot the cats, the lonesomenera of the house and at laBt an awakening to the fact that a member of the house Is not such It terrible Important Individual at tor Rival for Franklin's It is one of the "bromldlums" of science that when a practical discovery of great value to the world has been made by one roan It Is almost Invariably found that other men have been working along the same lines, though all independently of one another. Eyt If a trite statement, It is nevertheless an almost universally true one. The death of Prof. Dolbear recalls labors that antedated by many years the working Introduction of one of the most Important business and social agencies that has ever been given to the world. It Is the man who develops and adapts rather than the man who makes capture of a new Idea or principle who takes his place among the .mmortals. It has been supposed Franklin had a clear field and no competitors In his fresh contributions to electrical science, but It ia now recalled that If he did not have a com petitor he had a co-laborer and experimen ter, whose name is entitled to larger rec ognition than It has received In connection with the earlier stages of Investigation of this now so widely employed force. An electrical exhibition Is . In progress In Phlla delphla, and among Its features Is a card Of admission giving the bearer the right to attend the lectures of Ebeneser Klnnersly on the newly "discovered eleotrlo fire." This man .was a teacher in the Institution that grew to be the University of Pennsyl vania. He was a near neighbor of Frank lin as well as a friend and admirer, and their Scientific pursuits wers to a consid erable extent In common. In fact, a few of th men of his time claimed that some of tha credit that Franklin received should One Day Enough for Having spent a big bundle of moneV fix ing up and opening a hotel In Chicago, Louis Sing, a Chinaman, decided that one day's experience was enough and proceeded to sell out. This Is why he Jumped the Job, as told In the Tribune: "I open the Canton Saturday night. Big grand opening with fireworks, flowers, and Chinese fruit. Something to drink, too. Everybody tell me, 'Louis, you got fine hotel,' I say 'yes, cost me three, four thou sand dollar to open up.' "About twenty my good friends call In to see me fct grand opening. Pete, my man ager, had a red vest Tha police sergeant over to Harrison street station tell me to make Pete take off vest. He say It drive trade away. I go and tell Pete to take off vest, nd he tell me to Jump In the lake. He say he manager of hotel and he wear any kind of vent he want.' Then I aay, Oo far as you like.' "About 1 o'clock In the morning, after all my friends gone, Pete want to lock door and go to bed. I say, 'No, If you lock door, It ain't hotel.' He say to me, 'What you know about hotel.'- And I say 'd little, but I know, more than you I say, 'I don't wear rca vcsi anyway. "Then Pete he get mad and tell me to leave the hotel. He say he manager, and I must take orders from him. I tied a can to pete right there. "I try to sleep cn a cot In ths office, but bell ring all nlsht. Some ono want les water and somebody else kick for more heal. I go down in the basement and fire up the furnace. "About 1 o'clock a cab coma with twn Chinamen In it.' They want front room. I say all the front rooms are occupy, and they say I don't know how to run hotel After they go away I try to go to Bleep ataln. Thn the telephone ring and some all, I oon tired of my bargain, sublet tha house and went to live In bachelor apart ments." Representative Gilbert M. Hitchcock ot Nebraska Is married. Postmaster General Frank Hitchcock is not married. Repre. sentatlve Hitchcock lives at a certain fash. lonaMe apartment house In Washington, rostmaator General Hitchcock haa barheloc apartments at the same place. A day or two ago when Representative Hitchcock returned to his home from th4 Capltol he found among his mall a lettas) from a New York department atore ad dressed "Mr. Hitchcock, The Connecticut , Washington, D. C." ! Representative Hitchcock opened the en I vclope and frowned at Its contents. Asl soon as Mrs Hitchcock saw the contents of the envelope she frowned, too, and looked Inquiringly at her husband. The envelop contained a bill for 128 parasols, the eot of which was considerably more than th average government clt-rk receives from Uncle Pam each month. "I do not understand this," said Mft Hitchcock to his wife. "I have not n barked In the parasol business." A second glsce at the bill showed that although the envelope was addressed "Mr Hitchcock." the bill , was made out t9 "Frank Hitchcock." Now Representative) Hitchcock Is a democrat and Is keen on tha scent of 'extravagance in a republican ad ministration. He immediately has a vision of an outrageous misapplication of funds In the postofflce. He returned the Mil to the envelope with a note, whleh. read: "This envelope , was opened by mistake. The .enclosure was read with amasement i (Signed) Gilbert M. Hitchcock." j There will be no congressional investlga ' tlon of the wholesale purchase of parasols by Postmaster General Hitchcock. Repre sentative Hitchcock having discovered that the parasols were distributed as favors by Mr. Hltclrcook at a cotillon at which he waa host recently.' , Recollections of a Pio - neer in . the Elec trioal Field. Glory have been given to Klnnersly, though noth ing is recorded that' gives any positive clue as to how the honors should have been divided. ; Franklin was a man of the world, while Klnnersly preferred ' the cloister of th scholar. Moreover, Franklin knew the value of printer's Ink better than almost any ; other man of his generation, and, while Kinnersly's lectures might have been heard by hundreds, the former's theses' went to hundreds of thousands and are going still. He was evidently the more masterful spirit , and doubtlessly the bolder and more confl- , dent Investigator, too sure of his work to be Jealous of others, while Klnnersly was too modest and retiring to be Jealous ot him or to claim more than he was perfectly, willing to grant , , The professor addressed to him this un grudlng appreciation of the development of the lightning rod: "I most heartily con- 1 gratulate you upon the pleasure you must have In finding your great and well-founded expectation o far (fulfilled. May this method of security from the destructive violence of one of the most awful powers of nature meet with such further suocese as to Induce every good and grateful heart to bless Ood for this Important dlsoovery. May the benefit thereof be diffused over the whole globe. May It extend to the latest posterity of mankind and make the nam of Franklin, like that of Newton, inv mortal. V That prayer haa been pretty well answered, one of the most notable ap plications of the device toeing to the Wash- , Ington monument at the national capital.- Boston Transcript. 1 Sing Experience of a China man Banning a Hotel body op wire want to know If this Is tho police station. I ay, 'No, you got wrong number.' "Half past 8 o'clock Chinaman In room No. 12 ring the bell, and when I go up atalrs he aay. 'Bring me ooffee and rolls.' I ain't got no coffee In the place and rolls, and he say I keep h of hotel. "Then to make It good a fellow, look Ilk Italian, he skip out by lowering his suit case out of back window into alley. He beat me out of 7S cents for night's lodging." ' ' Marriage Superstitions. ''Blessed is the bride that the sun shUMs) on." A bride should use no pin In her wedding clothes, and she should avoid looking In tha tlasj when she Is completely drenaed for church. . The wedding ring should not be tried on before tho service, and to take It oft after ward Is unlucky. , "It you marry In Lent you wlU live to rent." May Is an unlucky month for wed dings, and June and October are specially lucky. . It Is an old Yorkshire custom to pour hot water over the doorstop after tha happy couple have departed, In order to keep ta threshold warm for another bride . When tho bridesmaids undress the bride thsV must be careful If she have any pins about her to throw them away, A single pin left might cause her Ul-luck. And If a bridesmaid keep one of these pins she need not expect to be married before the next Whluuntlde or Easter at tha very earliest. Home Notes