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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (April 1, 1910)
FRIDAY, APRIL 1, IM,
. tut tTMAiiX ? Daily -Bee
V "VNDKD BT BDWAHD ROSK WATER.
VICTOR ROSrWATKR. EDITOR.
F.ntrl at Omaha poatofflce second-
I matter. .
TIRU8 OF eUBSCRIPTION.
Hal.'y Bee (Inoludtng Panday). per week lje
Dllr Bee wtilvut Bunday), rr w,V15
Illy nx (without Sunday), on year..o
t!lr Boe and Ponday. one year w
DELIVERED BT CARRIES.
Evening Bee (without Punday). Pr week Je
Evening Be (with Sunday). P' w ,l2
Pundsy Be, one year fj7
Saturday !, on year 'li:.'' t
Address all complaints of Irregularltlee U
delivery to City Clroutetton Department
Omaha The Hee Building-
South Omaha Twenty-fourth and N.
Council Bluffa-lJ Beott Street.
Lincoln-til Ltrtle Bulld'ng
Chlcaao-IMB Marquette Building
New York-Rooma 1101-llOa No. J4 West
Thlrv-thrr4 Strait A
Weshington-Tai Fourteenth street N. w.
ConHnunteatlona relating to f
editorial matter should b addrsssta:
Omaha Bee, Editorial Department.
Remit hr draft, express or postal ordar
payehle to Tiia Bee Puhllshlng Company.
Only t-rant stamps received In payment of
mall hceounts. Personal cheeks, escept on
Omaha ,or aaatarn sachsnga. not accepted.
STATEMENT OT CTRCtTt.ATION.
State of Nebraska, ttouglas County. e.t
George B. Tsuohtwk. treasurer of Tht
Baa Publishing Ompany. being; duly
sworn, aaye that tho actual number of
full and complete eoplea of Tha Dally.
Morning, Evening and Sunday Baa printed
during tha month ot February. JilO. waa
1 43,140 li a.cro
t 4S.so 1 4a.M0
1 43.S7S IT aa.SM
4 4fl,t7 it a,ss
I i... 4S.0M II 40,770
41.740 St 41,00
T 43,810 II 40.M0
I.. 43.0M tt 43.070
l.10 tl 48,040
10 4,a0 II 48,010
11 48,700 16 48,080
II 43,100 It 43,440
II... 4aU00 IT.., 41.700
14 4830 It. .4 43,070
R turned eoptao, ...
Nat total 1,108,070
Daily average..... 40,400
OKORdlS B. TZ3CHVCK.
Subscribed In my presence and swore to
before ma this 2tth day of February, lilt.
abeerlaera th etty traa
r-irtlr ahaalat it Tave
snavileeV thcaa, Addraaa will ae
aaa4 m eftea mm reaeate4.
Taken all In all, March 1910 goes
out with a good character.
' If you see a bat on the sidewalk the
v.. to find out whether it hides a
Lu-itK 1 to kick. It.
Over 200,000 peope went to Atlantic
City to spend Easter. Oh, what a
millinery display was there!
No need to hunt for lawyers willing
to .go on the supreme bench without
even inquiring as to the pay.
A New York preacher recently said,
"Hell Is right here." That evidently
puts Texas down to second place.
A peculiar thing about the discovery
that tome buildings are fire traps is
that, the authorities too Often discover
U after the fire.
Omaha i booked to be a station on
the transcontinental aeroplane high
way. Pleased to have travelers drop in
on us at any time.
If Omaha has a new policeman who
can speak seven tonguea it goes with
out saying that he can swear in seven
Do not worry if you find salt In
your coffee and mustard on your ba
con today. It is just All Fools' day,
with chances that you are 'lt."
The Egyptians may not be sure
whether Mr. Roosevelt pleased them
or displeased them, but it is a safe
guess that he bad a "bully time."
Congressman Hobson'a proposed au
tomobile roads are to have a width of
1,430. feet presumably to give the
lnnopent, pedestrian a chance to dodge.
That New York watchman who
looted a home he was employed to
guard, missed his vocation. He should
have run for the legislature at Albany.
If President Taft should look this
way for material for the supreme court
judgeship he would not find any of
our lawyers dodging the Judicial light
Savings banks in the world hold on
deposit $15,000,000,000 in money and
the United States has 40 per cent of
It. Postal savings banks will make
our percentage still larger.
While damage by prairie fire is al
ways to be deplored tho suggestion
that Nebraska has had a $1,000,000
pratrie fire reads altogether too much
like an exaggeration of prosperity.
Bribery trials In Mississippi will In
all probability bo staged in the near
future. They are so dramatic and re
plete with climaxes as to make all
sorts of spectacular effects possible.
From the fact that 3,000,000,000
packages of chewing gum were sold
in the United States last year one
might think that from being a habit
gum chewing has become an Industry.
If it be true that music will make
bens lay more and larger eggs, the
opera will next be transplanted to the
chicken coop. Care should be taken,
however, in selecting the themes, for
comie opera might addle the eggs.
When Pahlman neglected to auggeat a
better location for tha capital than Lin
coln ha dtecloaed what a clever head be
had for cajoling tha ausceptlble. Lincoln
Star. . , i
Mayor "Jim" is evidently proceeding
on t bo theory that any other location
would bo better than Lincoln.
Problem of the Tlatfonn.
The platform problem la not Incidental
to primaries or to conventions, but to the
effort to fit tha Infinite variety of voter
Into one of two mould. Tha problem will
axlat, platforma will be repudiated or car
ried out In bad faith, J net so long aa they
re forrad to carry a load not adapted to
tha function of partlea and platforma.
Whether under direct primary or conven
tion ayetcm Tha Bee knows that though
ayry party platform Ip tha atete eapnuaed
county option tha Douglee county Ifflala
tora would oppoae It. Tha obvloua way to
aolva tha platform problem la to free par
ties from tha neceaelty of dealing with
apeclal non-party laeuea, such an laaue aa
la now shattering party llnea bare. The
Bee would do the stata good eervlce by
bending tteelf to the obvious aolutlon of
the problem. Lincoln Journal.
In this tho Journal seems disposed
for once to look at the problem of the
platform more from a practical stand
point rather than the standpoint of
pure theory. The platform is supposed
to outline the position of the party on
the political Issues of the day, and
where the party is substantially agreed
as to policy no serious difficulty pre
sents. But where there are Issues
raised that are essentially nonpolltlcal,
or on which the people do not divide
on party lines, writing the demands of
one side or the other Into the platform
operates to disrupt rather than to
There is also a further question con
stantly propounded as to how far the
party platform concludes tha candi
dates running for offloe under the
party name. Does a national platform,
for example, obligate a State officer,
or a state legislature, to a tfeoullar line
of action, or should the national plat
form confine itself to subjects of na
tional policy? In the same manner,
the question may be asked, "Can the
state platform prescribe the attitude of
a member of the legislature with ref
erence to matters of local moment?
What the Journal says about tho next
Douglas county delegation Is doubtless
true, that Irrespective of Us political
complexion it will be opposed to county
option. But Its position will reflect
the sentiment of tho people of this leg
islative district whom this delegation Is
expected to represent.
Wo agree with the Journal, there
fore, that "the obvious way to solve
the platform problem Is to free parties
from dealing with special . nonparty
issues," and. that the question of licens
ing or prohibition? of the sale of liquor
is, in fact, a local ie'sue that should be
fought out locally and should have no
place in a state platform except of the
Last year when three judges of the
supreme court and three university re
gents were to be elected, both demo
crats and republicans passed the liquor
question by, believing .'that it did not
belong in that campaign, and the re
publicans won out on a straight party
lineup in spite of tho pretense of non
partisanship with which the democrats
tried to fool republican' voters. On a
straight party issue the republicans
will win again In ..Nebraska this year,
but if they get tied up: wltli prohibi
tion, or other nonparty Issues, they
will have a harder fight ahead and
have to depend more on the usual
blunders of the democrats.
According to the computations of
famosu astronomers, - Halley's comet
will be careening around through the
heavens. In a tramplike manner, dur
ing April and May of this year, on one
of its periodical tripe through this sec-.
tion of space. A great shower of
meteors has been promised us, which,
it is said,, will jlast for an hour or
more, occurlng some time during the
night of May 19 At that time the
comet will be plainly visible, being
distinguished from other heavenly
bodies by its remarkable brilliancy
and its long tail of meteoric star dust
and gas. The spectacle will be one of
considerable note and will be observed
by thousands. '
Halley's comet makes a trip around
the eun In an elliptical orbit once in
every seventy-five or seventy-six years.
It is a huge globular body of some
thing, of which we know nothing defi
nite, of great brilliancy and is said to
be many times larger than the earth.
The long appendange , stands straight
out from the sun rat all times; It Is
about 20,000,000 miles long and 600,
000 miles broad at the end. It Is the
end of this tall through which the
earth will pass.
The reason given by astronomers
for the tall of Halley's comet pointing
away from the sun is that the ele
ments composing it are so minute and
thin that the pressure of the sunlight
forces them to take the outside of the
orbit. The comet travels at a rate of
several hundreds of thousands of miles
an hour. It will not come within 15,
000,000 miles of the earth and will
probably be seen again by few, if
any, members of the present genera
tion. A notable tradition in the history
of nations Is that to the appearance
of comets have been attributed great
disasters, wars, pestilences and
drouths. Some astrologers predicted
the flood of Paris over a year ago from
some sort of astronomical phenom
enon. Some predict disaster of some
sort from this one, although no one
has yet said Just what It will be. The
rise of great men in times past has
been attributed to the appearance of
comets at the time of their births.
3n fact, Halley's comet has been given
credit for having something to do with
the greatness of Julius Caesar, Napo
leon, Frederick the Great and a large
number of others. To the credulous
all such stories are credible.
However, tho main thing to be re
membered about Jlalley's comet is
that it will be roost brilliant during
the middle of May; that It will be vis
ible for several nights and that It will
be perfectly harmless, insofar, as the
earth is concerned.
Stronger Coaches Needed.
A brief review of railroad accidents
for the last year indicates that the
larger number ot deaths and roalmlngs
thus caused occur in the coaches - and
smokers. The reason given for this
Is that the large, heavy steel sleeping
cars, when an accident happens, plow
through the lighter day coaches, which
are largely made of wood, smashing
them into splinters and at the same
time crushing the passengers riding
there. This has been the case so often
that much comment has been heard
upon It. The railroad companies have
from time to tlmo made Improvements
in their service and equipment, but
there are still too many accidents from
weakness and Instability in both track
and rolling stock.
During recent years most of the new
sleeping cars have been constructed of
steel. At first only the bed of the
car and the framework were of that
material, but more lately a number
of all steel cars of the sleeper type
have been placed in service. These
are very heavy and solid and are an
ample protection for the passengers
they carry. As a result very few sleep
ing car passengers are ever seriously
injured in time of wrecks. They es
cape and the all-steel coaches them
selves are rarely demolished, although
their weight and solidity fairly crush
the lighter cars.
Several progressive railroads are
Installing steel car equipment for the
ordinary passenger, with very sat
isfactory results, and others are to
follow as rapidly as tho shops can
turn the cars out. It it to bo hoped
that the example thus set will he fol
lowed by other roads and that before
long, for the safety of life and prop
erty, all the coaches used, whether
sleepers, day coaches, smokers, bag
gage or postal, will be of this more
While the country in general hat
been shocked at the extent of the cor
ruption exposed In municipal affairs in
Pittsburg, yet the most serious aspect
of It seems to have been the last to
develop. The part played by the na
tional and savings bank officers In
bribing councilman that their banks
might profit from the city deposits is
decidedly discreditable to a class sup
posed to be above such performances.
The question is, how could national
banks pay out big chunks of bribe
money and hide it from the national
bank examiners? That crooked bank
clerks can misappropriate the funds
of the bank and sometimes escape de
tection by clever manipulation of the
books Is not so disquieting, but when
tho heads of the banks themselves are
caught using the bank' money as
bribes to buy business for private
profit, a drastic remedy should be
available. , ,
, In this instance not only are. the
bank officials party to tho corruption,
but they ara prime factors In it, and
the banks areJthe principal benefic
iaries. To uphold the Integrity of the
national banking system it would be
no more than right that banks con
ducted in such lawless manner should
forfeit their charters to make sure
against repetition of the offense. Such
a punishment would bo severe, but It
would be an effective deterrent to
future malpractice and corruption of
the same sort.
Kansas City for Biver Traffic
The reputation which Kansas City
has long had for doing things Is rein
forced by the most recent example of
Its energy. Kansas City desires to de
velop a transportation service on the
Missouri and In order to assure the
project has pledged $1,000,000 in
stock subscriptions for a corporation
organized to put boats on the river.
A given time was set in which to raise
the money and the enterprising citi
zens of that town went to work. A few
of the most wealthy and public-
spirited signed up for $50,000 each to
encourage the effort and help bring
out the smaller contributions. With
thirty days of the allotted time for
the undertaking left, $30,000 more
than the amount pledged had been
The example thus set by Kansas
City has aroused St. Paul to discuss,
seriously, a like campaign for the up
per Mississippi. Interested men in
that northern city have investigated
the situation, comparing It with the
conditions existent in Missouri and
have decided that even a smaller ef
fort could produce like great results
for St. Paul, because of better river
conditions which obtain. Kansas City
has set a pace for other river townB,
and if it is to be taken as a prophecy
of future effort, to be made in behalf
bf the development of river naviga
tion, big things are scheduled soon to
take place on our inland waterways.
- Between the devil and the deep blue
sea hardly describes the dilemma In
which a man finds himself nowadays
when driven to drink. On one side is
a clamor for laws that will compel
him to drink water, and on the other
the testimony of experts that water is
seldom fit to drink. And here Is the
president of the Nebraska conservation
congress asserting that he found fifty
Wells near Lincoln "containing the
hairs of cats, rabbits and other ani
mals" giving the water a flavor not
possessed by even the Missouri river
liquid. With all these warning signs
what is a thirsty mortal to do?
' The reason why tho Oregon plaa of
choosing- United States senators com
mands favor in democratic quarters Is
that tho only tlmo U was over tried In
practice it led to the election of a dem
ocrat by a republican legislature. If
the first experiment in Oregon had
produced a reverse result and sent a
republican to the senate by votes of
democratic lawmakers the Oregon plan
would never have been adopted for
Nebraska by our late democratic legis
lature. According to s physician's certifi
cate filed In court one of the parties
to a pending divorce suit is afflicted
with "neuro psychasthenta," whatever
that is. It is not specified In the stat
utes as a cause for divorce, but tt must
have been merely overlooked by the
Of course every one knew that the
announced candidacy of a certain congressman-editor
for the United States
senate was setting our Nebraska prai
ries on fire, but still no one expected
the consuming flame to get beyond
control and devastate the land.
A Vermont man has recently been
mistaken for Uncle Joe Cannon and
the people of his community are in
doubt whether to, put him out of the
church or eleot him to congress. At
last accounts they were still divided on
After having rebuked Mr. Roosevelt
congress Is preparing to take It back.
It will be remembered In this connec
tion that Mr. Roosevelt Is nearlng
homo and will land In this country In
June and will land on it shortly there
after. Broaden Out.
New York Poet.
The trouble Is that to many stateamen
are In favor of peace with honor, peace
with Justice, and peace with reservations.
Instead of peace with all roan.
Glvtaar Poo. Proper Age
p-nut unt ft AAA vaara In an KrrvDtlan tomb
Is declared to be aa good aa tha eold-atorage
chicken that haa spent threa yeara on loe.
Paonle who tried to eat the chicken oaj
eaelly believe this, though thay might ax-
prras It differently. They would prooaDiy
consider It mora speclflo to ay that tt
oould not be any woree.
i t T
Logic of tne nitoation.
Federal lnvestlrators In the western rail
road demand for higher wages endorse
the desired Increase aa Justified by, a 23
per cent Increase In the coat ot living in
th last four veari. The loglo of the in
vestigators cannot be questioned. Their
decision" will be quite as Important as a
Dreoedent as' in Its Immediate application
to the railroad problwm In hand.
Moat Rat oral Thtngr to Do.
New York Sun.
Thar, u no discernible Impropriety In the
journey of thef Hon. Oscar S. Straus from
Constantinople to Cairo to meet nn per
trnA and former official chieftain,
Colonel Roosevelt On the contrary. It la
natural that Mr. Straus shtfuld go. For
the statements that tha American ambasaa
dor waa ""summoned" from his post by a
private cltlxeh traveling on privaio dub
.... tk.r tfim nrnhaaaador la neglecting his
dutlea fo'rJthe"ake of Colonel Rooaevalfs
convenience ol pleasure; and that tha am
k.aiinra tnumev to the Nile at tha ex
pense of the ' American taxpayere thara Is
no responsible .authority wnaiever. iv
sensible person will believe a word of all
this. ' ...
A GREAT JUDGE.
Transition of Jadfe Brewer front Lib
eruliet to Iudlvldonllat.
A great Judge, yes, but a Judge whose
Jlfe work falls Into periods which may be
clearly distinguished. It Is not unlikely
that history, taking his career In a large
way, will write him down as the Intellectual
equal of almost any of tho great Jurists
on the supreme court bench. But his con
temporaries, who recall his influence upon
current events, will naturally think of him
in three ways.
As a member of the supreme court of
Kansas In the 70s, Judge Brewer set a re
markable pace. His opinions placed that
court well up in the front? If not at the
very front of the state tribunals. This is
no mean tribute, for it must not be for
gotten that the state courts of lajt resort
affect social conditions and property rights
more closely and at more points than the
more august body at Washington. He who
writes the chapter of Judge Brewer's life
in the court house at Topeka will have a
story of no little Interest and signlfcance.
And when he waa appointed by President
Harrison to the supreme" court of the
United States in 1S89 he carried remarkable
powers and a progressive spirit with him.
He was of marked liberality In his views
and had much to say about the necessity
of keeping the law abreast of social condi
tions. The letter kllleth, the spirit giveth
life, and there was no mistaking the fact
that David J. Brewer was for the spirit.
But It was not very long before, with
other Judges who might be named, he took
fright at certain popullstlc manifestations
of the period and settled back Into what
may be called, without stigma, a reaction
ary view. He thought he aaw a great
wave of paternalism engulfing the country
and his opinions began to reveal very
clearly the necessity which he felt himself
under, of combating that sinister Influence.
From being a liberal, ha became a some
what extreme Individualist. His mental
powers, too, waned somewhat In the last
few years, as those who have followed his
long and somewhat tedious opinions can
But with these discriminations It Is still
fair, to carf David J. Brewer one of the
very biggest men who have sat with the
Our Birthday Book
April 1, 1010.
Edwin A.- Abbey, the famous American
artist, was born April 1. 1H62, at Philadel
phia. He is now making his home In Lon
don. Rev. A. B. Storms, president of the Iowa
Ftata Agricultural college at Ames, Is Just
60. He was born at Lima, Mich., and be
fore taking hia present position was pastor
of a church in Des Moines.
Fred Mets. president of the Home Real
Estate and Investment company, has an
April I birthday, being born here In Omaha
In IMS. Ha waa formerly associated with
hla father and brothers In the Mets Bros.
Fremont C. Craig, accountant with the
Vrton Pacific, la 48. He was born at Brace
vtlle, O.. and started out aa a telegraph,
operator for tha Erie railroad, coming to
Omaha la L
Around New York
BJpplaa on the entreat of life
aa Seen la tae Oraal Aaatrlcaa
Metaopalls fresa ay Day.
Mayor Oaynor persists In knocking mu
nicipal customs and practices with suoh
regularity as to provoke a succession of
painful shocks among the beneficiaries. A
score or more of barnacled practices revered
In the days of polities! machines have felt
the axe. Barnacled bureaus have been
sent to political Junk piles. Following with
accelerated speed are public telephones In
stalled In private homes, lopping off a
graft of $14,000 a year. The latest to feel
the ate Is the practice of the police of re
taining In the "rogues gallery" plrturee of
persons arrested and later discharged. The
mayor has ordered the gnllery stripped of
pictures of persons arrested on suspicion.
He reminds the police that to subject an
unconvicted prisoner to the picture process
and list him aa a rogue even after tha ac
cusation against him haa fallen through,
Is wrong no lea to bo abhorred than tha
"third degree." The bigness of a rogue's
gallery may be a thing to be pointed to
with pride by police chiefs, but can It be
a feather in any man's caj to have tha
guiltless among his trophies? A knock for
tha "third degree" la next on tha list of
"It Is astonishing," remarked a well
dresaed woman In an uptown car, "the
trouble theae department stores take in
order not to loaa customers that have an
"For instance?" suggested her male com
panion. "Oh, you are In that business, of course,
and know all about It, but tho other day
I ordered soma trifles for a party and
they did not arrlv In time, and I com
plained. Next day my maid brought up a
steel engraved card wtlh the name of the
manager of tha store on it- When I went
down I found such a stylish looking man,
faultlessly dressed, and full of apologies,
who assured me it would never occur
"Do you suppose you are the only one
he ever called on or that had to be pacified
that day even?" asked tht man.
"Why, no; exactly replied the woman,
bridling a little at tha Implied loss ot im
portance. "I suppose they take tha same
trouble with others who have large ac
counts. Tou ara In tho bualneas. Tou ought
"Then, may I ask what time does the
manager have left to manage tha store?"
pursued the man, attll smiling. 'The man
who called on you Is not the manager of
the store at all and I think you will find
his card simply says 'manager.' He Is the
manager of customers who have kicks
To lose his wife by a court decree of
separation and yet ba held liable for her
bills Is the experience of W. Oould Brokaw,
the millionaire yachtsman, whose wife re
cently won a separation from hlra. Two
New York dressmakers sued Brokaw for
$2,140 for gowns furnished Mrs. Brokaw
from November It, IMS, to January $1, 1900.
Brokaw set up a defense that his wife re
calved an allowance from him at that
time and that the gowna were a luxury and
not necessity.' Ho asked for an order
to dismiss the suit, but Justice Putnam at
MJgeola, U I., denied hla motion and
ordered the case put on tha oalendar.
Tha law In regard to automobillsts, ama
teur or professional, who break the speed
legislations Is explicit, and Diatriot At
torney Whitman of New York haa In
t tructed hrs assistants, in prosecuting cases
under It, to acctpt no minor plea in oases1
of a third offense: Tha penalty pre
scribed is both fine and Imprisonment. To
this tha apeolal sessions' Justices object, on
the ground that It deprives them of needed
Clscretlon. Thero Is, of course, something
in the contention of one of them that a
first offense may ba a very aerioua one,
while a third may have mitigating circumstances,-
but tha district attorney takes
the position that, while tha provision as to
first offenders may be too lenient, that
which Bays third offfnders ahall go to
Jail certainly Is not too severe, and should
"The Justice Is not deprived of discre
tionary power, except to the extont that If
he punishes at all It must ba by Imprlson
ir.nt," comments the New Tork Times. "He
can, If he chooses, suspend sentence or dis
miss, assuming, naturally, full responsi
bility when he decides to be merciful. Mr.
Whitman's stern policy will have, we feol
sure, the full approval of a public that
kr.owa by dally perils narrowly escaped
that chauffeurs who lack either the skill
or the Inclination to run their machines
properly are numerous In this city, and that
they cannot too soan be taught that pedes
trians have rights, even when they ven
ture off the sidewalk."
"If you've found my dolly please be very
good to her and bring her back right off,
and tell her you're taking her home!" Is
the plea of llttla Miss Mary Flagler, aged
6, only daughter of Harry Harkneas Flag
her, and the granddaughter of H. M.
Flagler, tha Standard Oil magnate. Miss
Mary haa a brother older and a brother
younger, but no sisters. So the dear doll
her first one, and answering to the name
of Clarice Beatrice Gladys Katharine Mur
iel Flagler has been her chum all her life.
The dolly is called "Trlx" for short. "I
waa playing right out In the park In front
of the house," she explained tearfully;
"playing 'Rescue' with the boys. Trlx
makea the most be-yewtiful captive prin
cess. The Indiana had taken her and bound
her and then gone out on the warpath for
fresh vie victims. When we came back
Trlx was gone."
The campaign of the New York tax re
form association for the abolition of taxes
on personal property Is proceeding quite
promisingly. Secretary A. C. Playdell of the
association writes to tha New York Times,
saying that owners of real estate aggre
gating $1(1,000,000 In value have ao expressed
themselves In favor of the reform, and
some of them pay no taxes on personal
property. One of the latter says he Is will
ing to pay extra taxes on his $200,000 in
vestment In real estate In order to abolish
the "Infamous, unjust, cruel personal tax."
It will be recalled that a bill abolishing
this tax In New York City la before the
New York legislature, Introduced at the
request of Mayor Oaynor.
Sballowneaa of Jingoism.
On his return from abroad former Vice
President Fairbanks utters words of truth
and soberness about American relations
with Japan. He is entirely right In de
claring that no ground exiats for Inter
rupting the peaceful aituatlon, and hla ut
terances ought to be pondered by those
fearsome Jingoes who are doing their worst
to provoke trouble with tha mikado's gov
ernment by continually predicting It as
PUring; Wary Game.
Sioux City Tribune.
Not expecting to get any votes In Lincoln,
Mayor Pahlman of Omaha did not run any
great risk In proposing to move the capital
away, but he refrained from saying where
It should bo loratad.
Cuts Grease and Dissolves
Dirt. It saves your strength.
The labor question is solved when you 44 Let
the Gold Dust Twins do your work." GOLD
DUST is an antiseptic washing powder that
works wonders. It not only removes the visible
dirt and grease, but goes deep after every hidden
particle and minute impurity every trace of
germ life sterilizes as well as cleanses and
leaves everything it touches clean, pure, whole
If you want to reduce the muscular effort of
household cleaning and
make work a pleasure, let
GOLD DUST show you
the way. All you have to
by directing its energy; it
does most of the work.
by THE N. K.
Makers of FAIRY
Once Pittsburg councilman could com
mand a price, but now hey give themselves
Now comes the story that science has
produced wool-bearing poultry the object,
of course, being to enable their eggs to
survive cold storage.
Canada took from this country this year
86,481 valuable cHlsnns. They knew that
across the lino lay the cheap eteak zone.
Frederick B. Wemrworth, the oldest ac
tive member of the Ancient and Honorable
Artillery company, died of pneumonia In
Boston. Mr. Wentworth was 83 years old,
and very aotlvo.
Weather Prophet Willis L. Moore has
Issued a few remarks placing tha ground
hog In the Ananias olub for falling to make
good this year. It la another case of dis
Now It appears from testimony given at
a hearing before the Pure Food board of
the Department of Agriculture, that "gin
ger ale" Is not ale and contalna no gin
ger. It Is only another case of a popular
beverge tasting more like ks name than
Julia Oleason, a Chicago shop girl, earn
ing only $12 a week, gave an Ester dinner to
sixty prisoners at a police station, paving
for tha food out 'of her savings, which
amount to SO. oenta a week for such work.
John D. Rockefeller and Andrew Carengle
are not to lhavo things all their own v ay
in the sunny side of the street.
"So you're going to marry an old man,
dear; and what has he to recommend him
besides t)ls money?"
"Heart disease, dear, awfully bad"'
"While I was engaged to her she made
me give up drinking, smoking and golf.
Jjsi of all, I gave up something on .my
"What was that?"
. "The glrl."-Judge.
"Zelaya blames the United States for his
"He Isn't up to date. Is he?"
"Because if he was he would blam
Uncle Joe." Houston Post.
"I should think a fan manufacturer
would alwaya be aure of success."
"Because fans are things that never fall
to raise the wind." Baltimore American.
"All I got for my trouble was a 'thank
you,' " said the man who begrudges
"You're lucky," replied the billionaire
philanthropist. "I'm expected to say
'thank you' to people who find me a suit
able method of giving my money away."
"I am sorry," said the manager to the
bare-footed dancer, "that the electricity Is
behaving so badly tonight and the house
isn't more than half lighted."
"That Is really fortunate," said the lady,
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GUCKERT & McDONALD, Tailors
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317 Sooth Fifteenth Street
'I k aou DVST ru Ao yaw uoHT
SOAP, the oval cake
"because the spectacle case containing my
costume seems to be hopelessly mlnluld."
"Is this proposal the result of a bet. or a
joke, or a dare?" asked tha girl.
"No; I ask you to marry ma because I
"It Is unusual, but, after all, the un
usual Is the proper csper nowadays. I ac
cept you, Algernon." Kansas City Journal.
"For a whole year I turned my back on
"You noble man; what wcra you doing?"'
"Driving a brewery wagon." Buffalo Ex
press. Patron This set of teeth you made for
me Is too big.
Dentist Yes. sir. Bit down In the chair
and 1 will enlarge your mouth a little."
"Who Is Jane to marry?"
"Ilia name Is Bridge."
"Good gracious, does she carry the craEg
as far as that 7" Chicago Tribune. -
"That man over there seems to get tha
best of everything, and yot I've never seen
him give a waiter a tip."
"That's easily explained. He learned tha
trick in his former business."
"And what was his former business?"
"He was a waiter." Cleveland Plain
UNCLE HIRAM'S VISIT.
Yes, it's lively in the city, where they'va
got their 'lectrlc lights,
Ami 'the people soon have wrinkles from
their staylti' out o' nights; .
They've got shows aud things to keep 'em
from a'glttln' lonesome there,
And they look all-flred stylish In the costly
clo's they wear;
Iiut I guess they have their troubles, Just
the same as me and you,
And I reckon that 'they're often ruther
worse'n ours, too.
We've got wood piled .In the Woodshed
that'll- last a year or So,
And there's more oct where that coma
from, and moro saplln's still to grow!
We ain't worried over coal strikes, let tha
cold winds blow away,
We can carry in the billets and not have
a cent to pay; ,
While they're shlverln' up yonder where
they've got so much to see.
We can heat up for 'the trebles, that the
Lord sent you and me.
There Is always somethin doin' to make
cMy people sad; '
If It ain't a saiiFap 'amine, why, you'll
hear the water's bad;
When the strikers Mop the street cars,
then Ihe mischief Is to pay,
And the people have to foot It, gittln
clubbed alon the way;
And the fever epidemics and the smallpox
Keep the city people Btewin', and I'm glad
to live out here.
Oh, it'e quiet in the country, and there's
few uncommon sights,
And God's moon and stars up yonder have
to do for 'leotrlo lights;
But with 'taters in the cellar and wood
piled In tho shed,
When there's hay stacked In the haymows
for tne stock that must be fed;
They can have their noisy city, with the
sight up Hiere to see.
And the kind old iulet country will be
good enough for me.
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