BP!
THE OMATIA RITNDAY BEE: JANUARY 23.
iyl 1
Tim Omaha Sunday Ber
FOUNDED BT EDWARD ROSEWATER.
1
VICTOR ROSEWATER. EDITOR.
Entered at Omaha postofflca u twont'
clasa matter.
TERMS OP SUBSCRIPTION.
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Dully Bee (without Sunday), per week 10c
Dally Fee (without Sunday), one year H
Dally Bee and Sunday, ona year MO
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STATEMENT OF CmCTTLATTON.
State of Nebraska. Douglas County, an.:
George B. Tsachuck. treasurer of The
Be Publlahlnc Company, being duly
worn, aaya that tha actual nutpber of full
and complete coplea of Tha .Daily. Morning-,
Evening; and Sunday Bee printed dur
ing; tha month of December, U0, wag J
ioijows:
41,80
X,7M
41,680
41.7M
IT
X
IS
0
48330
43330
41330
40,770
49,480
48,800
43380
43,980
43,800
44384)
43,810
43330
48370
43,410
43,490
S
S
..........
44,340
81..
a,aao
aa.
aa.
84.
84.
S.
87.
t 41.S70
,
a,oco
I.,.. M.(M
XI 48.M0
U 4130
xa 4,seo
as.
30.
81.
X4 48.470
X8
IS
Total ..
43300
44,429
X388310
Returned coplea 10,130
Nat Total 1313,380
Dally A vera e 43334
QEORQ3 B. TZSCHUCX. Treasurer.
Subscribed In my preaence and aworn to
before ma tbla Hat day of December. 190.
YT. 1. WALKER,
Notary public
bsewlbsrs leavlar lbs city ttm.
poraxlly Uoilt Jaava Tba Beo
Ballad to then. Address will be
ek-8T mm sftaa aa re seated.
The theaters announce "The Return
of Eve." Lock up the apple crop.
That freight rate war is one of the
happy products of the January thaw.
In California It appears to be the
wicked flea that every man pursueth.
It may be considered that Umpire
Cannon gave Lloyd his base on bails.
- The Tammany braves regard most
of Mayor Oaynor's appointments as
disappointments. y -
St Louis has recorded another
tremor. Maybe the wind was blowing
, the Eada bridge.
In the matter of Jan Pouren, it
seems to be for Russia a case of "first
, catch your rabbit."
I . .
A newspaper headline reads, "U.
8. Women Dazzle Kaiser." ' What is
there new in thatT s
1
' Daily doings at Washington illus
trate that golf is not the only game
with hazards and bunkers.
Almost time to shake the mothballs
out of the pennant nd brush the dust
oft the base ball slang vocabulary.
Fortunately, that shearing of the
Wall atreet lambs leaves the rest of
the country feeling quite comfortable.
Having spent her six millions of
credit, Leopold's daughter now has op
portunity to enjoy her one million of
cash.
Evidently Zelaya did not remove all
the cactus thorns from the presiden
tial chair before turning It over to
Madris. '
If It proves true that the Irish hold
the balance of power in the iiew Par
liament, they may be depended upon
to use it i
I
Snow-shoveling may be quite as ben
eficial an exercise as the much-advocated
wood-chopping, and besides it
serves for conservation.
x Discovery by a savant that the
brain is bigger in sleep does not ex
plain the absence of intellectuality In
the appearance of a snorer..
When the United States attorney
takes that western steer by the horns
we may be able to show Mexico what
a real bull fight looks like.
It Is all right to refrain from eating
meat if you want to, but to have your
doctor put you on a diet that excludes
, meat is tyrannlca oppression.
The physician who announces that
milk kills 6 per cent of the race might
give us the formula for escaping the
other 94 per cent of chances.
To those who do not keep accurate
count it Is hard to tell what is the
day for peace and what for war in that
Nicaraguan alternating current
If the British explorer, who claims to
have discovered the exact site of the
Garden of Eden wants to be believed
he will have to produce the core of
that apple.
Former Congressman Belford of
Colorado, who died recently used to be
called "The Red-Headed Rooster of the
Rockies." Is it any wonder that some
people have an Idea that our states
manship is deteriorating .
Meat as A Malefactor.
The government's decision to have
the people's sttorney general proceed
to try King Meat as a common male
factor is bound to hare the good re
sult of settling a vital question of
which only one side has been heard,
and that not judicially. So general
has become the criticism of the so
called packers' combine that the ad.
ministration could not have hit on a
more timely subject for official in
vestigation, and the fact that the De
partment of Justice regards the,, evi
dence at hand as warranting procedure
under the Sherman anti trust law will
be accepted by many as ground for
hope of a speedy release from what
they believe to. be an , unlawful and
oppressive combination.
But it is one thing to Indict and
another to convict, ' and the processes
of law are deliberate, as witness the
cae of Standard Oil, that old offender
still doing business at the old stand. In
the meantime some of the people are
using the boycott as a remedy, with
what success remains to ne seen, for if
the big packers control the market so
absolutely, it would be within their
power to wait patiently till the boy
cotters return to the fleshpots, and
then exact such toll" as has been denied
them in the interim.
This fact cannot be escaped, that we
are a nation of m'eat-eaers. It is
partly because of tne well-nourished
condition of our bodies that we have
led the world's advance as against the
older nations, whose masses are
notoriously Impoverished because of
insufficient food. While' there are
advocates of the theory that we eat too
much meat, no man rearing a family
wants to lessen the supply of his house
hold table, and the boycott of meat
might be carried to an extreme of false
economy.'
In the long run, the government in
vestigation is likely to be the sounder
policy, and productive of the most
lasting benefit, for if it be found that
the claim of under-productivity is
honestly based it will stimulate greater
production; and if a combination of
packers in restraint of trade be proved,
the Sherman law should be Invoked ,to
break it up. Certainly, no question is
more Insistent and the public will
heartily endorse Mr., Taft's evident In
tention to make this investigation an
immediate undertaking of his adminis
tration. t Bad Boys of West Point.
Again the vexed question of hazing
at West Point .has come to the front,
this time in the shape of a bill before
the senate to determine just what con
stitutes hazing, to fix finally the status
of cadets who are convicted of violation
of the anti-hazing rules, and to make
definite provision against their., rein
statement. As at present administered,
the infraction of these ruraa, is a matter
within the sole jurisdiction of the sec
retary of war, who as a result of of
ficial pressure on the behalf of of
fenders is constantly in hot water
because of his decisions against thebad
boys of the academy.
It will no doubt1 be a relief to the
secretary to have flat legislation on
this subject to which he can refer all
disputants concerning his decrees, but
those who pin their faith to Webster
as an authority cannot but feel amused
to witness an effort on the part of
some of the senators to reconstruct the
definition of the verb "to haze."' The
American public has been through an
experience with West Pointers, which
has indelibly graven upon the popular
mind a significant understanding of the
meaning of the word, and is hardly in
any mood to tolerate any relaxation
from the existing strict regulations
against an offensive practice. Each
cadet turned out at West Point repre
sents a large cash investment on the
part of the taxpayers, and any attempt
to weaken the discipline at the academy
through a revision of Webster and a
shearing of the authority of the secre
tary of war win be met with strong
disapproval. s y
Retiring an Old Glory, .
Discouraging as much of the transi
tory popular literature of the day must
appear to, the real lover of books, there
is a distinct gain in one field of thought
in thA marked revival Of the art of the
essayist, which in times pastnas been
one -of the chief glories of the printed
word. No other form of bookishness
has had quite the persuasive and last
ing flavor of the essay, as witness the
sovereignty of Lamb or the established
place of Emerson. The poem may be
read and re-read at all times by those
who are fond of verse, but the essay
will often satisfy the thirst for poetry.
and it further appeals similarly to that
vast number of people who see no
majesty or wisdom except in lucid and
enlightening prose.
The coinage of new verse has sunk,
in these modern days, to the pens of
innumerable minor tinklers who strike
no clear, high note. But there has
arisen, in oth England and America,
a number of essayists whose produc
tions contain the full nourishment of
the literary grain, with a rich and ripe
smack. Much of this necessarily con
cerns standard aumors ana meir
works, as in the case of William Dean
Howells and Paul Elmer More, but
otherwise is general in Its scope, as
perfected by J. H. Toxall, Arthur C.
Benson and S. R. Crothers. Some of
the literary output is of aa delicate aiyt
delicious a flavor aa that of Goldsmith
or Lamb, and in a measure fills the
place in modern affairs that, Addison's
or Johnson's work occupied in elder
daya. ,
' While it may be said that much of
the responsibility for the current essay
rests with Robert Louis Stevenson, who
inspired a host of imitators, still there
can be no doubt that underneath the
surface of many of the newer whimsies
and philosophies there will be found
reflective thought, Inspirational inren
tlve and a serious purpose to revive the
whilom-faded glory of the gentle art
of essay-writing that shall enable the
leisurely reader to quaff invigorating
waters yielding both sweetness and
strength.
Combining the Experience Tables
xOne of the addresses before the
meeting of life Insurance presidents
held in Washington last week calls at
tention to the co-operative tabulation
of life Insurance experience statistics
for which the preliminary steps have
already been taken and which is ex
pected shortly to materialize in fact.
All the life insurance companies con
nected with the two principal associ
atlons have agreed to join in an In
vestlgation along these lines, whose
results shall be open to all and will
probably furnish the basis of new
actuary tables. Speaking of the scope
and purpose of this undertaking the
medical director of one of the big com
panies says: '
If this material Is so arranged and tabu
lated aa to answer only : those questions
which are of immediate Importance to lite
lnsuranoe, the companies will gain much;
a value greatly beyond the coat, but not
nearly all that they should, while tha pub-
lid will gain nothing. If, however, a broader
policy Is pursued, a policy which will add
nothing or little to the expense,. but greatly
to Its possibilities, a mains of material will
become available, which, . If properly
handled, will serve 80 settle once and per
haps for all time many of the most vexa
tious problems which are now disturbing
the minds of those most Interested In public
healttrxand preventive medicine. I believe
that this Investigation will be handled in
this broader and morevcomprehenslve way.
It is proposed In this work to cover the
ground from 1870 to 1910, and Include tho
experience of all American life insurance
companies. A conservative estimate of the
number of lives which will be Investigated
is 15,000,000. It is hard to appreciate ' tiie
Importance of such figures. They are
rather too large for the ordinary medical
mind to grasp;, but when wa appreciate
that most so-called medical facta are based
on groups of from fifty to 500; that when
a body of men report 1,000 cases of any
one kind, the labor represents a life spent
under extraordinary and most prolific con'
dltlons, we can then begin to appreciate
their importance.
A little thought will show how deep
the significance of such an lnvestl
gatlon may be on the great problem of
the conservation of. human life. A
true measure of the prevalence and
effect of different kinds of disease
should be of tremendous help in work
ing out plans for prevention. If such
information extending over a long
period of years and covering millions
of cases, can be made to serve as a
gauge of the Improvement or deteri
oration of the race it will support or
disprove the variegated answers which
have been given to many vital ques
tions. Clearly this -investigation,
although of special value to those who
are promoting it, far over-reaches the
limits of the field of life insurance.
. J i
States and Conservation.
Already the governors' conference
has demonstrated what a block to
progress the projected "house of gov
ernors" might become by preparing a
bill which is to be' offered to congress
proposing to turn all the water power
rights of public domain over to the sep
arate states. In the face of a definite
avowal of the federal policy for the
conservation of such resources this
shows the tendency of a state official
to restrict his vision to his state lines
instead of to view a publlcproblem In
its national perspective. This is per
haps as it should be, for the province
of a governor is to champion his state's
rights, but when governors get together
and ask the national administration to
apportion federal powers among them
they are making for diversity and
division instead of for harmony and
uniformity which had been predicated
of their conferences.
The separation of federal and state
powers is clearly defined in the consti
tution. In the specific matter of water
power It would seem to be not difficult
for any state to proceed at once to con
serve such of its forces as lie outside
the immediate Jurisdiction of congress.
Effort to get the national legislature to
transfer its prerogatives to the individ
ual states appears only as a waste of
energy and time. Congress can no
more be expected to split up control of
the public domain than to transfer its
control of navigable stream's, and as
suredly the national executive will not
countenance this zealous but mistaken
effort to take out of the nation's hands
oneof the most important features of
the whole reclamation project.
Apportionment of conservation work,
in the public domain among the states
would be only too likely to reBult'in
some quarters in the very spoliation
which all the effort at Washington has
been designed to prevent.'
The Future of Irrigation.
President Taft's special message on
conservation contains a passage with
reference to the work of the reclama
tion hureau. and the future of irrigation
which-has not had the attention it
deserves. The irrigation project as
originally Inaugurated by congress wae
made to depend upon a revolving fund
to be replenished by sales of public
lands in turn to be reinvested in Irri
gation works to bring still more land
within the area of cultivation. But as
often happens the calculations upon
Lvhicb it was -figured that this plan
would thus finance itself have not
come up to expectations. On this sub
ject the president says:
Ona of the difficulties which has arisen
Is that too many, projects In view of the
available funds have been set on foot Tha
funds available under the reclamation
statute are Inadequate to complete these
projects, within a reasonable time. And
yet tha projects have been begun; eettlers
have been Invited to tako up and. In many
Instances, have taken up, the public land
within the projects, relying upon their
prompt completion. The failure to com
plete the projects for their beneHt Is, In
effect, a broaeh of faith and leaves them
In a most distressed condition. I urge that
the nation ought to afford the means to
lift them out of the very desperate condi
tion In which, they now are. This condi
tion does nbt indicate any excessive
waste or any corruption on the part of
the reclamation service. It only Indicates
on over-zealou desire to extend the bene
fit of reclamation to as many acres arid
as mnny states as possible. I recommend,
therefore, that authority be given to
Issue not exceeding $30,000,000 of bonds,
from time to time, as the secretary of the
Interior shall find It necessary, the prd
ceeds to be applied to the completion of
the projects already begun and their
proper extension, and the bonds running
ten years or more," to be taken up by the
proceeds of returns to the reclamation
fund, which returns, as 'be years go on,
will increase rapidly in amount
The president's suggestion is that
the government issue $30, 000,000 of
bonds and loan the proceeds to the
reclamation fund for ten years sub
ject to repayment out oXthe revenues
that would naturally accrue, but which
under the present conditions would
not be" available for use until actually
paid in. Such proceeding would move
up by ten years the amount of reclama
tion work that could be carried on with
130,000,000, although perhaps at the
end of ten years, unless the loan were
renewed or the proceeds of the fund
greatly increased, the work would have
to. be reduced In amount if not sus
pended entirely. Inasmuch, however,
as these Irrigation works are practi
cally permanent and ought to take care
of themselves, the real benefit to the
country from them, will be .larger than
if they are expedited in this way with
the resultant gin of ten years in time.
Stirring Up the Senate. -
The president's reminder to the sens'
tors that they too have a mission In
the public service and that they might
add to their popular appreciation by
getting busy with some of the admin
istration's legislative program, Is fur
ther lndic&tion of the determined Btate
of the executive-mind to make his an
administration of accomplishment
While Mr. Taft is the president of
the whole people, he is quite within
his rights and will win public approval
for reminding the republican members
of the upper house of the platform
measures to which the Darty stands
pledged to the voters who elected him.
In the case of the postal savings bank
bill, the statement has been made that
some of he senators are not In favor
of it, but, they cannot escape the
fact that this was one of the measures
on which the voters definitely passed
at the last election, and now that the
president has recalled this and other
items to the seriate leaders, we may
look for early activity in that body
along practical lines. Dally it becomes
more and more apparent that behind
the Taf tsmile is a vast . canacitv not
only for adnlnistratlve control but
also for real constructive vork.
President Taft is a strict construc
tionist to the extent of insisting that
under the constitution there can be no
federal law governing insurance com
panies, and that the insurance business
cannot be brought within the Interstate
commerce elause. He is willing
9
advise, however, the enactment b;
congress of a model insurance lw for
the District of Columbia with a view to
its adoption subject to modification
by the various states. It la up to the
insurance people now to agree among
themselves on what thej would regard
as a model insurance law.
Yale Is to have a new professorship
of A8syrlology founded by J. Pierpont
Morgan in honor of the late William
M. Laffan, who succeeded Charles A.
Dana as editor of the New York Sun.
It developes that Mr. Laffan was an
authority on Babylonian records and
art. The ; versatility or Mr. Parian is
attested by the fact that nobody who
reatfthe Sun from day to day could
have discovered from Its up-to-date
contents, that Its editor was wallowing
In ancient Assyriology.
No legislative" session makes a pei-fect
record. The last session did not. World-
Herald. v 1
Such a remark would be nothing
unusual in a republican paper, but' it
is quite a concession.from a demo
cratic organ,, speaking of a democratic
legislature.
If Representative Murphy of Mls:
souri really expects to accomplish his
task of eliminating the tip from hotel
life he must become one of a trium
virate with William Dean Howells and
Edward Bok. .
At any rate, Commander Peary's
magazine story about his North P.ple
expedition proves, that whatever else
he may have discovered, he found a
fine lot of Eskimos willing to pose for
his camera. ,
The epidemic of flash marriages is
somewhat obscuring tho glitter of the
theatrical stars seeking divorces, but
these interested may have observed
that Reno is still doing business at the
old stand.
Prof. Willis L. Moore, the weather
expert, reports having found an en
velope of outer darkness above the
earth's atmosphere, which may explain
the continued absence of the quondam
Cook. . . ''
Evidently the passengers on that
Missouri Pacific train thought the
holdup was only a masquerade de
vised by the management to relieve
the tedium between waits.
Killing the goose that laid the
golden egg falls into the class of cheap
crime compared with the theft of an
rgg laid by the $11,000 prise ben.
The full enormity of this grand lar
ceny is apparent when it In known that
the egg was not only fresh, but new
laid. The differencet Ask your
grocer.
New Yorkers are askings how to
make buckwheat cakes. Gradually
the spirit of American enlightenment
spreads to our most provincial corners.
Readers of "Ben Hur" will beapt
to doubt the authenticity of that Lew
Wallace statue when they fail to Bee
the general driving a racing' chariot.
Still, staying off of trains is no in
surance. An Illinois woman never
took a railroad ride in fifty years, but
death overtook her just the same.
A Demd Cinch.
New Tork Mail.
Funeral expenses have gone up another
peg. On the whole, It may be cheaper
to live.
High Bids for rarer.
Washington Post.
The politicians of merry England are
doing some ground and 'ofty tumbling,
also. Government guaranty against loss
of employment Is tha latent vote catcher
propoaed by the ultra-liberals.
I
A Hunch for Governors.
St.l,ouls Kepubllc.
Governor Hughes' suggestion that the
next general meeting of governors be held
In some state capital Instead of In Wash
ington Is likely to reoelve wide approval.
The people who elect governors are Jeal
ous of their going up to Washington to
get Ideas and suggestions from the ad
ministrator!! of the national government.
I
- Damorer of the Breach.
Baltimore American.
It is now proposed to boycott those arti
cles of food for which extortionate prices
are charged. However much the average
man may sympathise with the movement
and Its purpose, the weapon of warfare
adopted Is hardly likely to prove popular;
for starvation will kill off the campaigners
quicker thjm It will the trusts.
, ------
r Baltimore American.
There Is a demand for persistent and
vigorous prosecution of those trusts that
defy the law. It is' the duty of the fed
eral government to maintain a well-defined
policy tn this reHpect and to carry
the prosecution beyond fines. The men
at the head of those trusts must be pun
ished as are other persists At violators of,
law. y
Make M Unanimous.
San Francisco Chronicle.
President Taft Is convinced thst the
wreck of the Maine should be raised. So
Is every right-thinking man In the coun
try. .Until It 19 done there will always be
a suspicion that the real cause of the
explosion which destroyed the battleship
was not the one put forwa.-d by the board
Which investigated the disaster.
I
Much Depends on the Feeder.
New Tork Tribune.
There can be no question of the po
tential efficacy of the method now being
adopted In Cleveland to force down the
price of meat. It a considerable part of
the population of any .city refrains from
buying meat the jsfl'lng value of the
stock on hand there wllK go down. The
chief drawback to the remedy is that It
Is likely to be considered too thorough
going.
PnrnlAM nf f k 1 1 41m.
I Denver Republican. '
Those Who are disposed to feel peevish
over the fact that so many of our na
tional songs are sung to borrowed airs
may get what consolation they can out
of the fact that the song of the Cru
saders jyas sung to that delectable old
tune of "We won't go home till morning."
It may yet develop that the walls of
Jericho fell down to the tune of The
gang's all hers."
PIONEER MISSIONARIES.
Tribute) to the Men Who Biased
Salvstloa'a Highway.
Collier's Weekly. i
If Theodore Roosevelt's physical self
denial nd strenuousness bo the product of
his western experiences, some of -it may
have been contributed by tho example of
the early western missionary. One par
sonage at Virginia City, Mont., in the
early days was built of green logs, chinked
with mud,, and with a dirt roof. An ex
temporized carpet was made of cow skins,
nailed, while green, to the floor, half side
up. A straw bed!, with coarse' army
blankets, was a - luxury. Male members
of the different congregations often were
revolvers and knives strapped about them.
Invitations to preach were extended by
gamblers and saloon proprietors. Never
was a meeting disturbed, nor was aver
any man of God . treated with anything
but kindness a fact which accounts for
tho charity of tho western missionary for
the open and larger frailties of the western
pioneer. The preacher was often broad
ened by tho brotherly spirit of tho com
munity and by tho freedom from social
conventionalities and restraints at least
he grew tolerant. . There was little bigotry
of creed, Jason Lee preached the first
Protestant sermon west of the Rocky
mountains, at Fort Hall, Idaho, In VSi.
ramer itavam. tne jesuu, was an accom
plished physician, ministering to the phys
ical as well as moral ills of a widely
scattered flock. In his little mission church
at Stevensvllle, Mont, hangs still the old
flintlock rifle, stern bar to savage dangers.
The leemasonry of the pioneers was one
of the few charms of pioneer lite.
J.
Our Birthday Book
, January 83, 1910.
Charles W. Knapp, publisher of the St
Louin Republic, Is 62. Mr. Knapp Is a
native of St. Louis and a native of the
newspaper business, the Kepublio being
one of the century-old newapapers, and for
two generations In control of the Knapp
family.
Charles M. Harger, who writes a great
deal on western subjects for eastern mag
azines, was born January 23, WA. He Is
located it Abilene, Kan., where ha pub
lishes a newspaper called the Huflector.
Franklin W. llarwood, jr., with Thomas
Cusack company, who make a specialty
of outdoor advertising, was born In Mil
waukee' January 23, lbKl. He was edu
cated In the publlo schools of Cedar Rap
ids, la., and has been In his present busi
ness with various firms for ten years.
Charles L. Ransom, the civil engineer.
la 38 years old.. He Is a native of Chicago
and a graduate of Purdue university, and
has been In the engineering department of
the Northwestern railroad, of which he is
now resident engineer, since 1889.
Major Edward H. Scbuls, corps of en
gineers. United Btates army, was bora
January 23, M7L Major Schuls has charge
of liver and harbor work along tha Mis
souri river. He is a West Pointer of tha
class of 18
4(1
'Sight
Drafts
at
Maturity
COURTNEY fit CO,
GROCERIES t
' OMAHA, NED.
MB. II. D. NEELY, Manager,
The Equitable Life Assurance Society of the U. &,
Omaha, Neb. I
Dear Sir: v
I have received from your hand draft in full for policy
, of $25,000.00 on the life of Tolf Tanson.
j I have now a practical demonstration that a policy in
The Equitable is a "Sight Draft at maturity."
I hand you today my application for a policy in the gum
of $50,000.00 and I shall not Jorget to tell my friends where
to buy insurance that insures. . ' .
Yours very truly, '
The Equitable , ,
Life Assurance Society
Of the United States?
PAUL MORTON, President. ' ?
"Strongest in the World" ?
HJQ. NEELY, Manager. '
Merchants National.. Bank Building; Omaha'
' T ' ' -
ASSOCIATE AGENTS
J. O. PHILTJPPI, E. H. P1CKARD, CHARLES VULTEE, Cashier,
GEO. M. COOPER. II. FAY NEELY, W. 0.".RflMIO, '
SERMONS-BOILED DOWN. ,
He who thinks he Is debtor to none 'Is
usually pauper to all.
Vices and vlrtuua both renew their youth
aa they are exercised. .
Religion" nover moans much unyjlt is
more than, all religions,
You cannot ,.vet a man to reverence that
which ha knows Is not right. .
Th ylosletft arguments to construct are
those that follow our appetites
Ay loneaome little) orphan sin always
turns out to have plenty of cousins, .
The trouble with tha self-conscious saint
l that he never knows his true self.
'.It's, no use praying for your husband
While the potatoes are getting scorched.
When a man has his religion in his wife's'
name ha always kicks on tha taxes.
The mission oc sorrow may he to teach
us how to enrich tha happiness of ethers.
If you would be at peace with yourself
you must be willing to bo; at war with
someone.
Boms men are so conceited they never
know whether they are confessing faults
or advertising virtues. Chicago Tribune.
I i
SECULAR SHOTS AT PULPIT.
St Louis Times: A New York minister
has advised the 'millionaires in his flock to
throw away their money; but this Is not to
be acceptqa as proof that he believes In
international marriage.
Chicago Record-Herald: One of the Chi
oago Veacherspredlots that the earth will
be a Utopia in 2010. With such progress a
has been made during ths past fifty years
it should not be necessary to wait until
2010 for the Ideal condition.
St Louis Republic: Tho clergyman who,
though reverencing the sex, has never taken
off his hat to a woman, undervalues tha
religious Influence of the better half of
humanity. If It were not for the divine
persuasion of women, how many unregen
erate men would ever be Induced -"to take
off their hats In the presence of the Most
High Inside of a church T
Baltimore American: General Booth, the
leader of the Salvation army. Is predicting
the speedy end of the world because of its
wickedness. Which only goes to show that
other prophets, long since forgotten, prophe
sled the same In their own days and that
this wise old world Ts still rolling on, doing
business at the old stand, and with no fears
of rot surviving this latest prediction.
New York Tribune: Church statistics
showing Increase or docrras-e In member
ship and attendance and what not else are
ell very wull In a way, but they miss the
?lst of the matter, which Is the personal
factor. ' If they could tell the character of
the mlntrter's preaching and 'other work
they would throw'more light upon tho sub
ject which they aim to Illumine. The
Chrlstmn church as a church has nover
lacked prosperity and succfss. As a polltl-
i cal machine, club or vaudeville show Its
fortunes are more dubious. .
i' O I
PERSONAL AND OTHERWISE.
Boycotts of meat threaten to outrun New
Year resolutions to the ultimate destina
tion. ' Bombs have given way to bumps in
Odessa. The Black' Sea port is batty on
roller skating.
The suffragettes polled one lonesome vota
In the British election, but captured two
bunches of ministerial hair.
The largest valentine factory In this coun.
try, located in Massachusetts, has been
destroyed by fire. Tha heat of the love
messages flamed In tha wrong spot
A' New York judge foolishly attempts
to expound domestic law In respect to the
husband's pocket and the wife's searching
fingers. What's the use? Judges haven't
tha last word. ' 1
Blaaon Thompson, manager of tha rail
way paws bureau of Chicago, re main a the
most irreconcilable Inaurgent against Taft's
railroad plans now visible on the snowy
pikes of the middle west.
Thomas W. Law son, Boston's expert
trust buster, Is striving to pump bay slate
gas Into the Burley tobacco combine In
Kentucky. -As soon as tha connection Is
mada Lawson will strike a match and
smoke a pips or two.
OMAHA, NEB., Dec. 18, 1909.
ANTON L.UNDSTROM. "
-
J,
DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES.
t. '(-'
Her Wake up,
your sleeDl
Jim!
You're talking tn
Hlm-Leram 'lone! It's ths oply chanea
I ever get! Cleveland Leader.
"Is he rich?"
"He uaed to bs."
"Well, Isn't he nowT"
"I don't know; he has been engaged to s'
chorus girl for nearly a year." Houston
Post. .; .
"Mildred, I take It for granted that you
father objeota to my coming to sea you."
"You do him an Injustice, Mr. Booodla,
He's perfectly willing for you to coma. J
am tha ona that objects. Awfully disagree
able weather, Isn't It?" Chicago Tribune
Husband What.'. Three
hundred 'a4
My dear, bow
fifty dollars for that gownT
WifeNo more than you. ' Didn't foil
spend $76 for your last suit? Life. t-
Mrs. Myles Who is that man - throwing
that kiss to? '
Mrs. Styles It must be you, dear. Ha
wouldn't be throwing mo a Kiss.
Mrs. Myles Why not?
Mrs. Styles Because it's my husband.
Yonkers Statesman.
Mistress Bridget, It always seams to ma
that the crankiest mistresses gat the best
cooks. , .
Cook Ah.. Go on wld , yer blarney.-
Philadelphia Inquirer.
"My wife . has cried only twlco alnoa
we've been Carried."
"On what occasions?"
"When I told her I couldn't afford to
get her set of furs tor Christmas and
when I got 'em for her." Cleveland Leader.
THE HAND AT THE WHEEL,
Thomas F.
Pbrter In St.
Democrat.
Louis Qlobe-
It matters not what course, my ship may
so,
That leaves the port 'neath skies so ealra
- and clear;
Tho' later, threatening winds may wildly
blow,
Of harm I have no fear.
The storm may beat in fury 'round nty
barque,
The ocean's spray up to tha masthead
leap, V
The way be long, ths night bo starls-is
dark.
Secure my course I keep.
It matters not how swift ma be tha tide,
Tho' lightning cleave with lurid flame U
sky;
But that my ship will every storm -
ride,
On this J can rely.
Nor does It matter when the goal I gain.
Nor If the ship be script of every mast.
My heart nor Hps will murmur or ettiss
plain, , ,
When safe the anchor's cast.
Why, there Is such a flood of hope In me.
To doubting hearts thte much I will re
veal ; '
The hand that launched my barque 'on
life's great sea
Is ever at the wheel. ' ','
I7e Sell lOOJlinds
Piheral Waters
We will sell over 100 kinds Imported and
American Mineral Waters, and, as we ob
tain direct from springs or Importer, ceA,
guarantee f regimes and genuineness.
Boro Lttnla Water, bot., oOc; case,
Il,.rn l.lihU ... t .1 ..... n 11 -.A
cW, MOO. 110.00.
We are distributing agentj In Omaha for
the celebrated watert from Kxeelslor
Spring. Mo., and sell at following prices;
Regent, quart buttle, Z5c; dozen, -u;
chcu, W bottles, 18.00.
Kulpho-baline, quart botMo, 25c; dozen.
$2 25;; case, 60 bottles. )8.00.
Hulpho-Salltie. quart bottle, zdc; aozen.
Koterlan, quart bottle, zoo; aozen. i w,
Soterian, pint buttle, lec; dozen. Sl.W.
Sotcriau dinger Ale, pint bottle, .l&e;
dozen. tl.&O.
Soterlan Ginger Ale, quart bottle, St
dozen, $2.K. . ' .
Diamond Lithln, half-gallon . bottle,' 0o
case. 1 dozen. 1400.
Crystal I.lthia. (-gallon jugs, each, S10X
Salt Sulphur, B-gallon jugs, each, VI 25.
Delivery free to any part of Omaha,
Council Bluffs or South Omaha.
Sherman & McDonnell Drag Co "
16th and Dodge Stav
, , Owl Ores Co.
10th and Harney Bta.
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