Nebraska Newspapers

    THK P.KK: OMAHA, TUESDAY. JUNE 22, 1!H.
Tim Omah Daily Bee
F6UNDID Bf EDWARD ROSEWATER
VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR.
Entered at Omthl postofflce aa second
clam matter.
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION.
Dally pea (without Sunday), on year..l
ralljr Bee and Sunday ona year w
DELIVERED BT CARRIER.
Daily Bee (Including Kiindey. per week..lfc
Datlv B (without Sunday), per
Evening Be (without Sunday). per w
Evening Paa (with Bunday). pr .
Bunday Bea. ona yaar J
Saturday Bee, ona year ' ,
Addreaa all eamplalnts of Irregularities in
delivery to City Circulation Department.
OFFICES.
Omaha T ..i Bee Building.
Koath Omaha Twenty-fourth and IV
Council Bluffs-ll Bcott Street.
Mncoln-l tittle Building
Chicago 1MI Marquette Building.
New York-Rooms 1101-1102 No. "1
Thirty-third atreet. .
Waeh!nfton-T Fourteenth Street. N. w.
CORRESPONDENCE.
Communications relating to news and edi
torial matter ahould be addressed: Omaiia
Bee. Editorial Department.
REMITTANCES.
Remit by draft, eapress or P','.a"'
payable to The Bee Publishing Company
Only t-eent atampa rerelved In payment 01
mall aecounts Paraonal checks, eacept on
Omaha or eaatern exchanges, not aereptea.
STATEMENT OF CIRCTTLATION.
State of Nebraska. Douglee County, Ji,.
Oeorte B Taachuck. treasurer of The
Bee Publishing Compnn). oelng ul?
worn, aaya that the actual number of run
and complete copies of The Dally. Morn
ing. Evening and Bunday Be printed dur
ing the month of May. 10, wea aa fol
lowa: 1 44.750
43,000
4B.4S0
4... 49.090
48.860
40,350
T 40.S40
... 40,490
37.400
It 40.180
11 40,410
IS 40,310
1 40,150
14 40370
IS 40,510
IS 87,500
IT 40,340
Returned coplea ...
It 40.1P0
It 40,130
tO 40,140
tl 40.420
ta 40,310
fl3 3,aoo
g4 40,180
BB 3.40
9g 40,030
a?'." 40,100
St 40,440
8t 41.070
30 M.M0
aX 40,360
Total. .l-BBS.tOO
8,085
Net tatal 1,849,815
Uaily average : 40-318
QEORQE B. TZ8CHUCK,
Treaaurar.
Subscribed In my preaence and oworn to
before ma thla Slat day of May. lo
U. P. WALKER.
Notary Public
aaarrikwra tea-tag the city tem
porarily skoal have Tka Be
aaalled fa litem. Addreaa will ba
Banker Morse is out on ball, but he
is Dot cutting so much ice aa formerly.
Dewey's supply ship Zaflro has been
sold as junk for $300. It lasted
longer than the Spanish navy.
If we are to have a safe and sane
celebration of the glorioua Fourth this
is about the right time to begin.
A beer tree Is said to have been dis
covered In Africa. The arid states are
expected to place their orders early.
The custodian of the cloak room
will cheerfully find the senatorial hats
if the gentlemen desire to go home.
It would be Interesting to know
whether they propose to have a safe
and sane Fourth In the African jungle.
If Francis J. Ueney could not con
vince the jury In five months' trial
that Calhoun Is guilty, the task looks
hopeless.
Why all this fuss about a bill of
$600 for hosiery Mrs. Oould is not
the first person to put her money in
stockings.
That New York court is trying to
dectds whether Broughton Branden
burg Is entitled to a diploma as a doc
tor of letters.
Tbt expense bill of printing a few
more speeches like Senator La Fol
lette's ought to convert congress to
the free paper idea.
Speaking of names, one of the mem
bers of the Wisconsin legislature is
named Brew. And he does not live
la Milwaukee, either.
Kansas City newspapers are be
coming modest. In giving a list of
the great American cities the Journal
puts Kansas City last.
And now Creigbton university offers
to furnish Omaha with a morgue it
only Omaha will furnish the occupants
for It. . That looks fair.
The warden of the Georgia peniten
tiary haa a machine to punish unruly
convicts. The competition for the
laxy man's medal Is closed.
Now that John U.'s pastor has de
clared himself oa heresy hunting.
Prof. Foster may rest easy regarding
his job at Chicago university.
Uncle Joe Cannon says be is only
the servant of the house, but he has
yet a lot to learn about autocratic gov
ernment from the hired girl
The World-Herald has a great habit
of putting up Straw men In order to
knock them down and is again engag
ing Itself In this favorite pastime.
The city of New York has paid
Mayor McClellan $83,000 to reimburse
him for expenses In his election con
test case. "Law suits are expensive.
A million-dollar investment in a
ball park at Pittsburg ought to be
proof enough that the people of this
country take an Interest in the sport.
To the International Printing Press
men's union gathering here Omaha
' shines out an incandescent welcome
with best wishes for a most successful
meeting.
Senator Depew has been sued as a
' itockhqjder la a cemetery and now
there are some who are unkind
enough to say they know where he got
bU trash jokea.
Corporation Tax Complications.
The more the proposed federal tax
on the net earnings of corporations,
recommended by President Taft, Is
studied the more complications it pre
sents. While the plan of reaching
incomes from corporate holdings
without running the risk Involved In
a general Income tax of questionable
constitutionality appears at first to be
quite simple and the way for It en
tirely clear, putting the theory into
practice without discrimination and
inequalities Is certain to be difficult.
The fact is that the attractiveness
of th Income tax Idea rests entirely
upon the supposition that it can be
made a universal tax and possibly a
single tax. The old orthodox canons
of taxation laid It down that every
person should contribute to the sup
port of the government In proportion
to his ability and by advocates of the
Income tax the measure of ability was
taken to bo In proportion to the In
come he enjoyed under the protection
of the government. The Income tax
Is attractive only when it alms to Im
pose the same relative tax burden upon
all Incomes, although not necessarily
In mathematical proportion. It might
be proper to tax incomes from In
vested capital higher than incomes
from personal services,' but to tax in
comes from one form of Invested cap
ital and not to tax incomes from an
other form of invested capital at all
would certainly tend to discourage
such Investments.
Still another difficulty presented by
the corporation tax proposal Is that
of double taxation where the income
of one corporation Is derived in
whole or in part from another cor
poration whose net earnings are like
wise taxed. This is not so serious a
problem that it cannot be solved, but
to avoid double taxation the corpora
tions thuB affected would undoubtedly
have to reorganize or change their
methods of operation.
The greatest objection being urged,
to this proposed federal tax on cor
poration net earnings, however. Is that
to which The Bee called attention in
discussing the president's special mes
sage namely, that the federal gov
ernment would be seizing a source of
revenue on which the state and local
governments are already utilizing and
to which they would be likely to turn
still more. The federal government
has so far, with few exceptions, relied
for Its revenues upon Import duties,
Internal revenue taxes and taxes on
Interstate transactions from which the
state and local authorities are com
pletely ' excluded. When the federal
government reaches Into a new field
of taxation, such as It would here, the
claims of the state and local govern
ments must necessarily be made sec
ondary. Unfortunately our system of taxa
tion for the support of federal, state
and local governments has never been
worked out as a whole nor has any
real effort been' made to' adjust all
parts to one another so ns to mark off
an equitable division and avoid con
flict and duplication. Whether or not
a trial shall now be made with a
federal tax on corporation earnings,
the mere proposal will focus public
attention on this too much neglected
subject and should result in more
substantial progress being made.
British Investments in America.
The editor of the London Statist,
George Parish, has recently compiled
some statistics showing that British
capital invested in American railroads
and industries amount to $3,000,000,
000 and produce $135,000,000 In rev
enue to their owners. What is more
immediately significant Is the state
ment that British Investors had sent
to the United States during the past
year $67,600,000 and that the ten
dency Is to enlarge father than to cur
tail the amount,
British investments are world-wide,
but outside of the colouies are largely
confined to government securities with
the single exception of the United
States, where they tane.in railroads
and industrial enterprises. This vast
sum speaks, eloquently of , the part
British capital has played in our de
velopment and of the faith of a hard
headed people in our future. Three
billions of British money Invested in
the United States Is the logic which
British lingoes have been unable to
i overcome in the , past ana w men
stands as a guaranty of friendly inter
course between the two countries.
Sonth American Trade.
Two obstacles have in the past de
feated efforts to increase our trade
with South America lack of direct
steamship lines and banking facilities
Another steamship line has just been
put in operation between New York
and the east coast of South America
and powerful financial interests have
undertaken to supply exchange facili
ties by establishing banks in the lead
ing cities of the southern continent.
American goods have always won
favor In South America and many are
now sent there, taking the roundabout
way of Europe and in the past the
payments have been made through
European banks. With direct ship
ping and banking facilities there is
no apparent reason why the United
States should not supply a large por
tion of the manufactured Imports
The countries to the south of us are
progressive and wealthy and their
consuming power Is great, while they
manufacture little.
The Department of State, or more
particularly Secretary Root, has laid
a good foundation by creating a bet
ter feeling toward the United States,
supplanting the suspicion which here
tofore entertained for their big neigh
bor with a sentiment of amity. A
tew farseelng and earnest men have
long labored to secure a trade foot
hold anil now there is promise of see
ing their hopes realized. Under the
new conditions the chief drawback is
distance, and that is not material in
ocean-carrying trade. Contrary to
common belief, it Is farther from New
York to southern Brazil and Argen
tina than from European ports, but
this advantage is more than offset by
opportunities for return cargoes, the
I'nlted States being a large consumer
of the exports of those countries.
There has never been a more promis
ing field for American manufactures
than South America and never a time
when securing it should be so easy.
Kit Carson Centennial.
Kit Carson, who blazed practically
every trail In the intermountaln coun
try, was born 100 years ago this fall,
and it Is proposed to commemorate
the anniversary suitably In several
western cities. When a youth he took
up the pursuits of the trapper and no
man of all that hardy band was bet
ter equipped for the rough life. En
dowed with a hardy physique, abso
lute courage and tact he passed in
personal safety through the dangers
of a wilderness Inhabited by hostile
Indians. Ills highly-developed gift of
the sense of direction made him in
valuable to the explorers who pene
trated the country. Wherever they
deslrett to go from the far southwest
to the Canadian border he was willing
and able to guide. His genius prob
ably did more than any other one man
to lay the foundation for conquering
the west to civilization and he died
Just at the dawn of its realization in
1861.
Kit Carson's body now lies In a
neglected grave at Taos, N. M., and
citizens of Colorado propose to remove
It to that state, where his children
made their home, and erect a fitting
monument. A vast empire dedicated
to the highest civilization Is the mon
ument of Carson, Brldger, Baker and
their associates, but so rapidly do
things move that they arc practically
forgotten.
"Nullifiers and Repudiators."
Governor Shallenberger'B bombas
tic talk about ' nullifiers and repudia
tors" may impress some uninformed
folks, but It Is not likely to go very
far with people who are in touch with
recent political history. When it
comes to repudiation, the democrats,
both in Nebraska and the nation at
large, have a record of their own.
Even Mr. Bryan has been compelled
to take to task the renegade demo
cratic congressmen in the lower house
and the backsliding democrats in the
upper branch of the national legisla
ture. The Denver platform ha3 been
repudiated, both by the people who
refused to vote for the candidate run
ning upon it and by the democrats in
official positions who were expected to
be Its etaunehest champions. '
Here In Nebraska repudiation of
platform pledges has been equally
flagrant, although the fact that demo-
pop candidates were lust year appeal
ing for votes on two conflicting plat
forms gave notice in advance that one
or the other would have to be repu
diated later. The repudiation of the
home rule pledge was only part of a
pre-arranged bunco game and even
the promise for whose redemption the
governor claims most credit, namely,
the deposit guaranty, was partially re
pudiated because the law enacted ad
mlttedly falls far short of what the
people were made to believe they
would get.
When Governor Shallenberger talks
about nullification he is likewise tread
ing on thin Ice. Who is It that Is try
Ing to nullify the state constitution by
appointing a state senator to a civil
office in direct disregard of the express
constitutional prohibition? Who was
it who tried to nullify the constltu
tlonal amendment enlarging the su
preme court in order to turn out the
Judges appointed by Governor Sheldon
and seize the places for dyed-in-the-
wool democrats?
Governor Shallenberger's talk about
"repudiators and nullifiers" would
sound a good deal better coming from
some other source.
It Is not exactly a paradox, but
nonetheless true, that the people who
complain most about the bad condl
tion or our 6treet pavements are
usually the very ones who persistently
block all efforts at Improvement that
might require them to pay a few dol
lars in special taxes.
William J. Bryan, Jr., and Miss Hlen
Berger are to wed June 24. A few weeks
ago William J. Bryan, Jr., consulted his
parents In regard to the matter. Ha sue
ceeded In winning Hie approval of the
father of the bride as well. Alexander
Berger (father of the bride-to-be). Is ox
tremely wealthy. World-Herald.
Who would have thought it?
An Omaha man Is to lecture upon
"The Wit and Humor of the Bible."
We hope he will not pull down as
much trouble as did the Chicago pro
fessor, who recently wrote a book try
ing to square the Bible with the dis
coveries of modern science.
The frightful fatal collision of su
burban trolley cars a little way out of
Chicago Is blamed on disobedience of
orders by the tnotorman who was
killed. At any rate, the raotorman
will not be able to disprove the charge.
It Is encouraging to 6eud word to
Mr. Taft that his summer home at
Beverly Is a pleasant place, but the
president has an Indefinite engage
ment at Washington.
Out at Kearney Mayor Jim declared
amidst approving applause that he
was for "Bill" Oldham for supreme
judge because he believed in staying
with his friends who had fought the
battles of democracy shoulder to
shoulder with him In the olden days.
And then the conference resolnted in
favor of a nonpartisan Judiciary.
Ex-President Eliot of Harvard has
announced his provisional selections
for wh.it he terms a five-foot library
of liberal education, and already it is
apparent some extension shelves will
be needed to satisfy the critics.
The new preacher In Rockefeller's
church in Cleveland declared In his
Initial sermon that he had come "to
preach the gospel to the poor."
Strange how a preacher should get his
locations so mixed up.
Whether a deputy marshal is a mar
shal within the meaning of the law is
the point on which the Helnse con
tempt case rests. A hair Is never so
fine that somo fine-edged lawyer will
not try to split It.
General Coxey of "Commonweal"
army fame was a recent caller at the
White House, but this time he rode
up in a big, red automobile. Times
change and Coxey has changed with
them.
A 2Ve rl Incineration.
Boston Transcript.
Nebraska Is so near the extinction of its
state debt that it expects to "burn the
mortgage." before the year Is out.
LrnF Majeate, B'Gnah.
Washington Herald.
An ad valorem duty on the tariff speeches
delivered in the senate would not produce
enough revenue to pay the senators' salar
ies, In all probability.
Wotlni the Strentiona Life.
Minneapolis Journal.
Judge Alton ll. Parker expresses a de
sire to reorganize too demcc ratio party.
In the matter of willingness to essay stren
uous undertakings, It is evident enough
that the late Hercules had nothing what
ever on Judge Parker.
On Both Stdea ot the Fence.
New York Tribune.
Senator Lorimer of Illinois will have the
unusual experience of voting for a tariff
bill, first In the house of representatives
and then In the senate. He has gone on
record as favoring the house draft and on
record as supporting the senate draft Cir
cumstances seem to designate him aa an
Ideal agent for settling In conference com
mittee tho differences between the houses.
Stai
dpattera llnrd I'resae-.
Philadelphia Record.
The Insurgents had Senator Aldrich pretty
badly frightened when he had to appeal to
the president to pull them off with his
proposal to amend the constitution. No
wonder the Rhode Island boss has an
nounced that this will be his last term In
the senate. Public life isn't aa much fun
as it used to be. before those mustangs
from the wild west were turned Into the
corral.
Voice of the Great Hunter.
Baltimore American.
The predatory rich and the wicked trusts
congratulated themselves too soon If they
thought that the Hons, rhlnocert and hlp
potaml In Africa would draw off the light
ning of MiV-TtoNseVe.t's denunciatory' elo
quence from rhVi Selves'. He is,'- so to
speak, shooting 116ns with his gun in one
hand and potting trusts with hia Sen In
the other. It may be mentioned Incidentally
that any kind of game which the modern
Nlmrod wants to bring down la seldom, If
ever, out of his range.
CRUDE A.D I'WOHTHV,
Miserable Failure of American at
Black Ilnnd Methods.
St. Louis Times.
the case of Hubert Leslie Hayes, now
verging upon the mature age of 27 years,
according to his own statement, who Is
held sa federal prisoner because he merely
threatened, as Is charged, to blow up three
passenger trains of the Wabash railroad
unless that company should forward (5,000
In real money to his personal address, ex
cites an Interest not unusual, because It la
so different from that of other cases in
which so-called-black hand 'methods have
been employed.
Mr. Hayea has differed from those col
laborateurs In his profession who have
signed themselves with the dire manual of
the Black Hand by having been readily
caught. Most of the other gentlemen
brigands who have attempted similar meth
ods of procuring easy money have got
away with their bluffs either by easily pro
curing the amount solicited or by escaping
arrrest after refusal.
This simply leads to the conclusion that
the American-bred mind la not adapted to
the sinuous and evasive methods so
adroitly employed by our Intelligent Italian
confreres who come out of Corsica and
Sicily, mostly.
Mr. Hayes first should have secured a
president or two of the Wabash system,
and, having completely immured him in
some dark recess of the Harts mountains,
on the banks of the Wabash, far away,
should have sent In tentative suggestions
as to what the company might be willing
or able to do in the way of ransom if,
first upon the receipt of a finger and the
subsequent arrival of a piece of an ear
and thereafter the reception of a choice
selection of nose, they would have con
eluded that the held-for-ransom official
would be about half out of bodily members
if not speedily redeemed.
We look upon Mr. Hayes" methods aa
crude and unworthy of American Ingenuity.
A food does aot
need to be heavy to
be strengthening'.
E-C lorn Flak
are dainty and ap
petizing as well
as trc-gt-ein-g'.
Remember it's tbe
E-C process tbat
makes E-C Corn
Flakes so good.
Watch for the
mark oa tbe package.
Around New York
Jpplea oa tba Cnrreat of lfe
aa Sean In the Great American
Metropolis from Say to Bay.
Three hundred and seventy-five dollar a
square foot, the second highest prlre paid
for ground In the Manhattan division of
New Tork City, was paid last week for a
slice of 4.0O0 square feet of ground at
Broadway and Thirty-second street, known
as the Cnlon Dime Pavings bank property.
The buyers were Kngllsh investors. Four
years ago the property changer! hands for
$100,000. making a net gain of $..00.00) ff
the purchasers In that time. The south
cast corner or Wall street and Broadway
brought tM a square foot In 1905. Since
i:01 the record price In the mldtown section
has been tSJI.M) a square foot, which was
paid for the northwest corner of Broadway
and Thirty-fourth strret.
How Collector of Customs Loeb broke up
the White Carnation league Is one of the in
teresting stories In connection with-the
shakeup of the New York custom house
related by the Brooklyn Kagle. It seems
that for a long time certain men. well up
In the customs service have been In the
habit of making mysterious trips down the
bay on revenue cutters to meet incoming
steamers. On these trips the officers al
ways wore white carnations In the lapels
of their coats. No matter whether It was
bleak winter or a mild spring day, the
white bloom was as much a part of the
costume of the officers as their shoea and
ha is.
None of the members of the Order of
the White Carnation now make these trips
down the bay. Collector Loeb fathomed
the mystery of the white emblem and has
broken up the order. According to high
treasury officials the flower was a badge
by which wealthy travelers desiring to
smuggle valuable goods Into the country
recognised persons who were able to help
them In avoiding the payment of duty. The
wearer of the carnation could always he
counted upon as a "safe" officer who would
see that the smuggled goods were passed
without question. In explaining how the
scheme was operated, a treasury official
saidt
"Suppose Mr. Traveler was going to Eu
rope with the Intention of bringing back
some diamonds, silks or other valuable
goods without the formality of paying
the usual customs duties. If he located the
right persons, and I Imagine this was not a
difficult matter, he would find ready
promise of assistance. Mr. Traveler would
be told to watch for a customs officer
wearing a white carnation. Such an of
ficer would meet the incoming steamer
down the bay and all the smuggler had to
do was to ask the flower decorated officer
to have his baggage expedited. There the
responsibilities of Mr. Travelor ceased.
His trunks, with their load of undeclared
valuables, would be hastened through the
customs house under orders of the man
with the white carnation. If there should
be a settlement afterward, who would be
the wiser V
One of the members of the Order of the
White Carnation lived In a hotel In New
Tork patronised chiefly by the well-to-do.
This man occupied a suite of rooms, the
cost of which waa BO per cent, more than
his yearly Income from the government.
Apparently the extravagant habits of this
officer failed to arouse the suspicion of
Collector Loeb's predecessor. When Mr,
Loeb got on the trail of the white carna
tion story and learned what It meant, there
were some dismissals. In the lot, it la
stated, was the high-flying officer who
lived al tho expensive hotel. ,
After an extended period of opposition
the New York legislature in 1908 enacted
the Torrens law. It went into effect last
February, to the satisfaction of the great
body of real estate men ana all others con
templating at any time '.he purchase or
sale of land. But the Influences at work
to defeat the measure during Ita legislative
stages are apparently still active. The
first application for registration of a piece
of property under the new act In Kings
county has been held up and is now being
contested before the supreme court. The
law requires that every person seeking to
have a piece of property registered must
make owners of all abutting property par
ties to the formal action, which is prelimi
nary. In March of the present year a man
bought the piece of property now In litiga
tion and a month later the title to It was
passed as perfect, the abutting owners
permitting their part to go by default,
when suddenly one of them, owning a lot
abutting Just six Inches on the corner of
the new purchase, challenged the proceed
ings. This was a Florida tobacco Importer with
a Spanish name, having an office In New
York. He explained that the Title Guaran
tee and-Trust company had advised him to
take that course. Another of the interested
parties said he had also been approached
by a representative of the same company
who offered to provide hlrn with good
lawyers, free of charge. If he would oppose
the registering of title. Meanwhile further
transactions under the Torrens law are
suspended all over the state until this test
case, which may have to go through sev
eral courts, Is decided. Title companies
hate to give up a good thing.
The New York police department has
granted a month's leave of absence with
pay to Acting Captain Kuhne, head of the
Brooklyn detective bureau, who must
shortly begin serving thirty days" impris
onment for contempt of court In connec
tion with the photographing of an accused
banker some months Ago. He will go to
Jail es soon as the formal order of the
court Is received. Officials from all de
partments of the city government called on
Kuhne to express their friendship, and
many police officials hinted to him that a
plan was under way to reward him at the
end of his imprisonment by installing him
aa a full captain.
PERSONAL NOTES.
Ponular Mechanics saya, 'Butter 200 years
old Is frequently served in India." Yet
some people wonder why discontent bor
dering on revolution prevallB In the land
of fartines.
Harley N. Piper of Bellefontalne, O.,
who became a hunchback after being care
lessly lifted by hiH uncle. 22 years of age.
has won a suit against his relative for
$4,200 damages.
It seems worthy of explanation whether
that $r5.00 contributed to Syracuse Uni
versity by John D. Archbold Is a recogni
tion of past xeal or an Incentive to further
fulminatlons on the enormity of restrain
ing corporate abuses by law.
Sydney Windecker. Sylvester Wlndecker
and Mrs. Sarah Pier, all residing In dif
ferent parts of Wisconsin, who were born
In Lowvllle. N. Y., June . 1S44. are In
robust health and ate believed to be the
oldest living Amertran triplets. They hold
a reunion every ear.
Joaquin Miller is planning to establish
rninnv of Doets and to conduct a school
of pnetiy nrr his home at Frultvale In
raiifornia. He has given an acre of land
to Jlcnry Meade Bland and another to
A Bank with ample
capital and surplus
In 1863 when this Institu
tion became a National Dank,
the capital was $35,000.
This has been Increased
from time to time to meet
the needs ol a steadily grow
ing business.
Today the Capital, Surplus
and Undivided Profits amount
to over $1,200,000.00.
First National Bank
of Omaha
When your stomach
eat
I
WiMT
for ten mornings then keep on eating
it. It keeps the stomach sweet and clean
and the bowels healthy and active.
Herbert Bashford. They expect to build
cottages there and help found this colony.
Rollin Lynde Hartt, author of "The Peo
ple at Play," is a reformed reformer. His
early studies of the Other Half and their
amusements roused In him a quixotic de
sire to make them over. To this there suc
ceeded a more tolerant mood. Instead of
emphasizing their evil side he has seen
that It is offset to a vast degree by motives
clean and good.
Mrs. Taft has traveled more than the
wife of any other president. She has al
most as great a globe-trotting record as
the president. She has crossed the Pacific
half a doxen times, and has traveled In
Japan, Manchuria, Siberia, China and other
far eastern countries. She went to Cuba
with her husband, and to Panama, and
she has visited every corner of Europe with
him.
BREEZY TRIFLES.
Bashful Suitor -Will you be engaged to
morrow, Miss Sophy T
Sensible Sophy I may be, Mr. Week
nede. If anybody has nerve enough to ask
me. Baltimore American.
The girl in the grandstand looked puz
' "Do you understand the language they
use here?" She asked. ' - t
"Understand it!" exclaimed the wild
eyed fan by her side: "why, bless you, It's
the only kind of language there ls!"Chl
cago Tribune.
"Oh. what a tangled web we weave,"
said the apt quotationlst, "when first we
practice to deceive!"
"That's right," answered Senator Sorg
hum; "deception Is mighty dangerous un
less one has had a great deal of experi
ences'Washington Star.
Howard Before marriage he snld ho'd
go to the ends of the earth for her.
Coward And after marriage he did It
to get away. Life.
Benjamin Franklin had Just succeeded In
getting a spark of electricity from the
clouds.
"I rather guess," he chuckled, "that'a
about as near as anybody will ever come
to receiving a message from Mars "
Hastily reeling In his wire and pulling
the kite down, he made a quick getaway,
and was not in when the man came with
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Washington, Street,
Amsterdam, N.Y.
. i ,1 iTTi ' i iff' 3,
goes out of business
i
a bill from the consolidated electric light
ing companies. Chicago Tribune.
"Yes. they have very atrlct municipal
regulations In that town."
"Indeed?"
"A man was arrested there the other day
for drinking out of a trough that was In
tended for horses only." Cleveland Plain
Healer.
"I think It a very unwise move," said
Wiseacre, shaking his head, "to take a
man who has been a trolley car conductor
i Into the weather office."
I "What hss his previous employment to
do with his efficiency?" queried his com
panion.
"Why. naturally, to an ex-oonductor all
kinds of weather are fare weather." Bal
timore American.
Teacher Where was the Magna Chart
signed?
Intelligent boy At the bottom. Sir. Har
vard Lampoon. . -
IN EXTRA SESSION.
Washington Star.
Oh, melancholy fate!
Bound to the tariff by decree of atate,
I stand and watch the dally plodding
clock ,
Suffering like Prometheus at the rock.
Each morning's mall
Brings letters that assail '
My conaclenoa aentlltve. .-3 n . ..
l ot must I live
And give
My strength unto a futile tragic cry
To . the great eagle bird that hovera
nigh;
The bird of freedom proud that repre
sents The ruthless xeal of my constituents!
And this because
By various laws
I am supposed to do the bent I can
To bring unto my groping fellow-maa
The heaven-born fire which Hghta
The way to reason's heights.
In vain
I tug and strain.
The endless chain
Of argument that holds me In Its grip
Grows tighter. There's no hope that it
may slip
t'ntll, as happened In that mythlo day,
After long weeks of anguish and delay
Some Hercules
Appears and sees f
My sorrowing plight and break nty booda
with ease.
If there's a Hercules to calm this atrese,
Won t he please write and give ui hi
address? ' .
'Poroikn