Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, March 28, 1909, HALF-TONE, Page 4, Image 20

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    THE OMAHA SUNDAY BEE: MARCH 28, 1000.
D
n i rni-M ;
HUlUiUS The magnificent assortments and beautv of our soring displays is attracting throngs
ers to our store daily. The freshness and beauty of everything breathe forth the very essence of spring
TNC KIUABUI STOftC
of delighted buy- MiilUuJS
" tuff MLIIILC ITMI
THt HUtMJ TONt
High Grade Wash Goods
Department
We are now showing the largest, the
finest and mo3t up-to-date wash goods
ever shown in Omaha.
GINGHAM SECTION
Domestic Ginghams Toll du NorW A. F. C.
Utility, Normandles, Red Seal. Etc.. at
yd 12W 10 7K 5
Foreign Ginghams, Anderson's Scotch Zeph
yrs, Manchester, Fancy Ginghams, French
Zephyrs and other fine good at
yard 25 10 and 15
. Bilk and Mercerized Dress Fabrics Hana
', loom silks, Arnold's Silks, High Class Fou
lards, plain Crepes, Silk Striped Crepes and
other fine silk mixed goods, at
yard 50 30 35 25 10 nd 15
Reps, Pongee, Poplins, Etc., are highly mer
cerized and up-to-date, at, yard, 30 25
10 and 15
All kinds of goods for boys. School Suits,
KI Kl, Galate, Indian Head and Linen Suit
ings, at very low prices.
Never have we given sucb genuine bargains In
Bed Spreads, Sheets and Pillow Cases
as In our High Grade Linen Dept. Monday.
$1.25 Sheets, size 81x90, each
f 1.10 Sheets, size 81x90, each
$1.00 Sheets, size 81x90, each
85c Sheets, size 81x90, each
65c Sheets, size 81x90, each
$1.00. Sheets, size 72x90, each
90c Sheets, size 72x90, each
86c Sheets, size 72x90, each
79c Sheets, size 72x90. each
60c Sheets, size 72x90, each
14c Pillow Cases, size 42x36, each...
17c Pillow Cases, size 45x36, each...
20c Pillow Cases, size 42x36, each...
20c Pillow Cases, size 45x36, each...
85
75
GO
50
40
75
05
50
55
30
10c
11
14
14
Immense assortment high grade imported
Marseilles Ded Spreads, full size, come
fringed and scalloped, white and colored;
values up to $7.00 each, in one lot Monday,
each $3.50
Plain Hemmed Crochet Bed Spreads, full size,
heavy and durable, well worth $1.26, Mon
day, each 80
Mail orders filled while goods last.
Foulards, ftotgft Pongees, Messatines
The best assortment and values in these, the season's
most popular weaves, to be found in Omaha or the west. Just
look these over Monday.
FOULARDS ROUGH SILKS
. .... , Plain and satin finish Rajahs,
All the most beautiful new col- La Togsa Kough shantlJng8;
onngs and effects ; very mod- etc al, dscriptions and col-
efately priced on sale at orings; matchless values, at
69c, 85c, $1.00, $1.25 69c, $1.00 and $1.25
85c Messalines Just 50 pieces in the lot; choice jMonday, a
yard 59c
Rose, Resedas, Copenhagens, Wisteria, Conrads, Navy
Blues, etc. Greatest values of the season Monday.
Big Silk Specials in Domestic Room
Monday ."
10,000 yards of plain and novelty
silks, Peau de Cygnes, Poplins,
Messalines, Rough Pongees. Taf
fetas, etc., big snap Monday
at 50 1 30
BLACK SILK SPECIALS
fl.35 mark Taffeta, 80-ln. wide,
oil boiled, yard 80
$1.00 Black Taffeta, 30-in wide, oil
boiled, at,' yard 60
85c IUark Taffeta, 27-in. wide, on
sale, yard 55
Go0(Js, White Goods
In Our fjmeui Domestic Room
86-lnch Percales, long lengths, worth 10c
t 4 5
86-lnch Percales, full pieces, 12 He values
at ....8W
Full standard Indigo Blue Prints. .. .44
Simpson's Silver Greys, 10 to 20 yds.4H
Simpson's Calcutta Blues, 10 to 20 yds.4H
7 He Light Colored Prints 3H
15c Printed Organdies 7H
19c Silk Mixed Mulls 10
'19c French Batiste, Bide bands 12 H
16c French Batistes, side bands 10
12 He Domestic Batiste 7H
25c Highly mercerized sateen, black, perman
ent finish for shirts or waists lO
25c White Waistlngs jo
25c White Pique '10
25c White Batiste joc
25c White India Linon 10
26c Persian Lawns 10
15c White WalsUngs 7Hr
12 He White Check Stripes and other fancies,
t
40-inch Lawns, 19c graded. 7t
Ten other specials will be called off every
80 minutes.
High Grade Wool Dress
Goods ' Department
On Monday we will place on sale 100
pieces of new spring wool dress goods
in satin cloth, chevrons, serges,
French serges and other weaves that
sell at $1.00, 1.25 and $1.50 a yard
all on one table at, yard 76c
100 pieces of new and up-to-date dress
goods, plains, fancies, broadcloths,
etc., worth from $1.50 to $2.00 a yard;
all colors and blacks at, yard. . .96c
In our famous domestic room odds
and ends of fine goods, all wool dress
goods, worth from 75c to $3.98, will
go at, yard. 25c, 39c, 49c, 59c, 75c, 98c
Danish Cloth, cut from bolt, Worth 15c
a yard, will go at, yard 11c
i svtt
fl Most Imposing Display of the
New Spring Fashions
Evening Costumes, Dinner and Street Gowns, Tailored Suits,
Wraps, Skirts Waists and every thing in Children's and Infants'
Wear. Although the range of style ideas is almost unlimited,
including splendid assortment of the extremes, special attention
has been given to making our display one- of practical as well as
beautiful and exclusive styles.
In All Lines you'll find the highest degree of quality com
bined with lowest possible p:ice.
Tailor Suits A more gorgeous and truly artistic collection it
would Jpe hard to imagine; exclusiveness and high quality are
dominating features; their beauty in design and coloring, per
fection in fit and fabric, and quality of workmanship will appeal
to all women of refined, discriminating taste. Prices are the
lowest possible, considering quality. You'll find them at $75.00,
$65.00, $50.00, $35.00; and including the Crown Jewel Suits
at . ". .$25.00
We also show some nobby designs at $15.00, $18.00, $20.00
Spring Showing of White Goods
A new full line of St. Gall Em
broidered Swisses In all the new
est patterns, at, yard, 08c, 70c,
60c and 40
Domestic Swisses, regular 39a
grade, at, yd 25
46-Inch French Lawn for graduat
ing and confirmation dresses, at,
yard, 7Bc, 50c, 80c and. . . .25
45-Inch Sheer Batiste, regular 69c
grade, at, a yard 50
45-lnch Persian Lawn, at, yard.
30c and 25
Wash Chiffon, 45-in. wide, at. a
yard, 09c, 50c and 30
India Linon, 32 inch wide, at, a
yard, 25c, 10c, 15c and... 10
Mercerized Checks and (ancles,
regular 45c quality, at, yd. 30
Plain white madras for ladies'
tailored waists, at, a yard, 50c,
30c, 25c and 15
39c Plain Nainsook 36 inch wide,
at a yard '. . .25
Fancy Jacquards in all the newest
patterns, 27 inch wide, at, a yd.,
80c, 85c 25c and 10
Flaxon the newest thing in white
waist In g has the appearance of
linen, at a yard, 80c, 25c, 10
Irish Dimities in checks and
stripes, at, a yard, 30c, 25c, 10c
and 15
High Grade Drapery Department
We have just received the grandest line of fine high priced, as
well as medium and most popular grades of Curtains, Portieres and
yard goods for spring tade that has ever arrived in this city and at
prices far below what yon pay to other stores.
Beautiful Evening Gowns In
unsurpassed assortment and
unequalled quality, at $35
$45 $50 $60 up to $100
Handsome Street Dresses In
great assortment of fine wool
and. silk fabrics, all colors and
styles $15, $18, $20 to $60
A splendid showing of new Spring Wraps
at $5.00, $7.50, $10.00, $12.50, and up to $35.00
Chiffon, Panamas, Dress and Walking
Skirts, all colors, values to $10.00
choice $4.05
See the new Home-Made Wrappers,
the best anywhere at prices from
98c to 82.25
Fine Dress and Evening Waists In al
most unlimited assortment
88.90. S10. S12.50 "P to $30
Children's New Frocks and Dresses,
Ginghams, Madras, Linon Llngeres,
Etc, at . .50 to $5.00
Lingerie and Linen Tailored Waists
splendid values, at $1.50 $1.08
$2.08 up to $5.00
Children's .Spring .Jackets All the
nobbiest new styles at, $1.08
$2.08 to $7.50
Big sale of Infants' Wear in Baby
Bazaar,' 2nd Floor.
Are You Thinking of Papering This Spring? 'Just drop in here and look over the finest line of
Wall Paper shown in Omaha bar none. Our New Wall Paper Department fourth floor, front room.
Special reductions made to paperhangers. Get our prices and sample books. We Have Some Room Lots about 600
In all that we're going to close at once; the prices will certainly Interest you. Come In Monday.
We can sell you as good a cur
tain for 98c as you can buy from
any other house for $1.60.
Our $1.25 is as good as any
other at $2.00.
Our $1.60 is
other at $2.50.
our $2.00 is as good as
other at $3.00.
Our $2.60 is as good as any
other at $4.00.
bb good as any
any
And so on as you go up to $40
a pair.
Our portieres at $2.98, $3.98,
$5.00, $6.00, $7.50 and $10 are
as good as any ottier they ask $5,
)6, $7.50, $10, $12.50 and $15.00.
Come 'and examine our good
nets. This is the greatest saving
of all.
75c Embroideries Monday 25c yd.
A grand clearance of all embroideries from The Globe Stock, Brooklyn,
N. Y., Flouncings, Sheer, Corset Cover and Allover Embroideries, as
shown in 16th Street window, worth 60c, 75c and up to $1.00 yard,
also matched sets and odd pieces of Irish Crochet and Batiste Em
broideries, at, yard 25
15o Embroideries, Bo All kinds and
widths of Embroideries and Inser
tions, the remnants of soiled big
Durchases that sold to 15c vard. at
price, per yard 60
Hew Bloa City X.aces A beautiful
new line of Zlon City Elyrla Laces
just received, will be placed on sale
Friday In our big lot, per yard.. Bo
New Linen Torchon Laces The hit Of the Beason; greatest values ever
seen In Omaha, yard 5
Grocery Prices that are Worth Their Weight In Gold
We sell groceries to the people ot
Omaha within a fraction 01 cost, to
ell the goods. We want your busi
ness. That Is our reason for making
the following- low prices on hlghost
quality of goods.
10 bars Diamond "C" or Beat 'em All
Soap SlBc
I lbs. best white or yellow corn Meal
for Uo
lbs. choice Japan Rice aso
7 lbs. best Breasfast Rolled Oat in tut
for ...... 8So
8 10o pkg-s. Up-to-date Washing pow
der loo
Gillette's Washing Crystal, pkg. . . lo
4 lb. pkg. Pyramid Washing fowdtr
. for . .. ibo
Malta Vita or Corn Flakes, pkg. 7iao
24 lb, sacks best Rye Flour,.,.. . bSo
1 lb. cans assorted Soups THe
Bromangelon, Jellycon or Jell-O, at,
pl 7V4o
5 lb. cans Qolden Pumpkin, Hominy
or Squash 7Ho
S lb. cans solid packed Tomatoes BVjO
Gallon cans Apples 80o
Gallon cans Tomatoes Si6e
Peanut Butter, per Jar So
Try Hardens First for Butter, Cheese
and Butterlne
We ran save you from 25 to SO per
cent on your purchase.
Choice Dairy Table Butter, per lb. 81o
Fancy No. 1 Table Butter, per ib. 83o
Fancy No. 1 Country Creamery But
ter, per lb ago
Fancy full cream Brick Cheese, per
lb ISO
Fancy Full Cream White or Colored
Cheese, per lb 80o
2 lb. roll good. No. 1 Butterlne. . SSo
Our 15th oar of Highland Navels
will be on sale Monuay. This car
beats anything we have had this sea
son. They are extra sweet, bright.
Juicy and elegant flavor. The High
lands are the pride of California.
They are the orange of quality.
60c dosen sise, our price 30o
40o dosen slae, our price 85o
80c dosen size, our price 80o
25c dosen sise, our price 15o
The Greatest Market In Omaha for
Fresh Vegetables.
Fresh Spinach, per peck 80o
Fresh Beets, Carrots or Turnips, per
bunch 4o
2 heads fresh Hothouse Lettuce.. Bo
Large Head Lettuce, per head 7Ho
and Be
Fancy ripe Tomatoes, per lb. ... . 8o
S lbs. Jersey Sweet Potatoes.... lOo
Fancy Wax Beans. 1 lb. Is equal to
two quarts, per lb BOo
Fresh Cabbage, per lb 3Ve
New Onions, per bunch 4o
New Honey, per rack ISHo
t.ars-e Cucumbers, each . v loo
Fresh Roasted Peanuts, quart.. Bo
" Get Busy In the Garden
4 tooth Steel Rake, re-liiiorced, at,
only ,. 8So
Goose neck Bell' Steel Hoe 85o
Good Biff I Kpade, extra quality 4o
12-Inch Turkey Feather Duster, at.
only 8So
SSo extra heavy Wire Carpet Beater
at lo
!6o Carpet or Rug Beater only. . lOo
ISc Dust Pans, only Bo
Well made, strong Parlor Broom l9o
86c Wooden Bread Boards ....... ISO
Mrs. Vrooman'a Sink Stialner... lOo
S6c heavy braided White Clothes Line
at lo
36c sine Wash Boards ISO
Large, new white Willow Clothes
Baskets 69 o
Odd Clothes Baskets, each 35o
75c Steel Japanned Mall Boxes.. 390
14 quart enameled iish Pan.... IBo
TMC agLIABLE STOWS
Paint Department Specials $1.75 ready mixed
house paint, guaranteed 6 years, (20 years the
standard), best quality made, gallon. .$1,25
Scores
Grand
Bargains
from the
Globe
Furnish
lng Co.
Stock.
Biggest
assortment
and best
values in
all classes
of Furni
ture shown
In Omaha.
Monday we make a special display of the Bed Room Fur
niture from the Globe stock purchase. All this stock will be
closed this week. Get in early it will pay you.
$22.50 Brass Bed with 2-inch post
either in bright or satin finish,
sale price 815.05
A Score of Other Great Bargains in
Beds
92.00 Sewing Rocker A neat, new
design, with high back, variety
seat, Monday, at $1.25
$14.73 Oak Chiffonier A beauty
with' French bevel mirror and
golden oak polish finish, the
greatest snap ever, at, sale
Price 810.50
$14.50 Sanitary Steel touch 3 J
rows spring supports, bronz finish,
a big bargain, sale price. $3.25
Look for the sale tickets Monday. You'll find them on
hundreds of articles. They mean big savings.
Mammouth Assortment of
Housekeeping Linens
at less than cost of production in our
High Grade Linen Dept. Monday.
Strictly pure flax, 72-inch Belfast Table
Damask, dew bleached and good for
wear, regular $1.00 line, Special Mpn
day, yard 50-
Warranted pure linen dinner napkins,
size 22x22, grass bleached, beautiful
range of patterns, good value at $2.98
dozen, Monday, 6 for 75
Heavy Scotch and German Table Dam
ask, 72 Inches wide, celebrated gold
en flax, having marvelous wearing
qualities, worth $1.25 yard, Monday,
yard 70
German Silver Bleached Dinner Nap
kins, 22x22-lnch, strictly pure linen,
heavy round thread, worth at least
$2.75 dozen, Monday, 6 for....g5
Mammoth collection strictly high grade
hemmed huck towels, the best towel
value we ever offered, worth 15c each,
Monday, each
Pure linen center pieces, scarfs and
throws, good values at 75c, Monday,
each . . 29
All mail orders filled with care.
Grand Rug Specials for Monday
a ma
a general clean up ot all nr
stock left from the GLOBE 0
FURNISHING STOCK. You
certainly have never before
and probably never again
will see these values dupli
cated. Make, no mistake.
See them Monday. Come
early.
$18.00 Seamless Brussels Ruk-
10-wlre quality, 8-3xl0-G size
sale price $13.08
$20.00 Seamless nrussels Rugs
10-wlre quality, Kxl2 size on
"ale, at $15.48
$40.00 Milton Rugs In fine Ori
ental patterns, xl2 size, on sale,
t .-$28.50
60c Linoleums, extra heavy, 2 yd.
wide, from the roll, at square
yard 39
$13.75 "Kashmir Rugs", no wrong
Bide, 9x12 size, on Bale. $0.50
40c Ingrain Carpets wool, ex
tra heavy quality, yard. . . .29
Several other splendid bargain
offerings Monday.
All the Infants' Wear From the Smith-Kort Co. Wholesal: Stock cn
Sale at Wonderful Bargain Prices
Monday we will make a special display and sale of the
entire stock of Infants' Garments from the Smith-Kort
Wholesale Stock. These garments were bought at a tremen
dous bargain and will be closed regardless of real retail
worth. Don't Miss This Opportunity.
Infants' Sacques, Pinning blank
etSr Bibs, Booties, Underskirts,
etc., regular values to 39c, all
go in one lot, at, choice. . 10
Infants' Dresses, Coats, Hats,
Hoods, etc., regular retail val
ues up to $2.60, in one big lot,
at. choice Q8
Infants' Hose Booties, Leather,
Moccasins, Patent Leather
Shoes, Dresses, Caps, Jackets,
Phone
tun Doug. 2600
Try IHIaydieini9s First
Phono
Ind.
A-II31
Infants' Dresses, Wtiite and Col
ors; Kimonos, . Booties, Sacques,
etc, regular vaiues to 39c, go at,
choice 25
Infants' Dresses, white and colors,
dainty styles, regular values up to
$1.00, on sale, at, choice. .. 40
Infants' Outing Flannel Gowns,
values to 75c, all sizes, big snap,
at, each 39
Several other Splendid Special
etc, 39c values, at. ... . 10 Bargains in Infunts' Wear.
This display an dsale Monday on first floor, middle room.
Sheetings, Muslins, & Heavy
Domestke in Domestic Room
10-4 Unbleached fine Bheetings 19He
8-1 Unbleached fine bheeting 1740
8- 4 Roachdale Bleached 17'iS
9- 4 Pepperal, bleached 8 jo
9-4 Lot k wood, bleached 4.... fllo
Frutt-of-the-Loom BVfco
7H0
SSo
Lonsdale
Hope
Urookdale, 280 fine spun
Lonsdale Cambric
Berkley No. 60
Homespun Cambria , , 7Wo
iuc jjimet 7 i.o
12 He Lrimet 9Ho
SOo White Flannel 350
8itc White Flannel 85o
85o White Flannel 19o
10c Linen Crash 7VjO
7Ho unbleached all linen Crash.. Bo.
25c Russian Crash 15o'
11.00 all linen Bleached Damask, 72-
Inches 590
15.00 Pattern Table Cloths...
15.00 Napkins 93.49
10 specials for all day.
'-----""""-"'------'--------''''"-'--' - ,-11-11 -irii-iriiiriri-iirirM-i,-iririinr.-nrii-i-M-Mw..iUii-
Stove Department
Special:
From the Globe Funishinj ' Stock
Solid Steel Gas I'latcs 95
All Steel Cook Stoves 4-hole v.itu
19-inch oven, great snap, at.
sale price S9.40
Dandy Jr. Oaks, with 15-lnch tiro
pot, $14 value $6.05
We are showing great assort
ment of Universal, Detroit, Jewel
and Garlund Itangcs.
Don buy till
1 ins spiunuia
line of stoves.
Selections from the Story Teller's Pack
The Ksaene of Economy.
.ECRETARY CROWLEV of the
SI Cattle Raisers' association
I praised the other day In Qal-
veFion xne cowony auiurmiuiiu.
"The"" Cowboy automobile has
eome to stay," he said. "A
cowboy at the wheel can handle a hundred
' times as many steers as a cowboy in the
saddle."
"But the expense!" sold an English
rancher.
"It's cheaper In the Ions; run," said Col
onel Crowley. "I don't believe in cheese,
parlnf on these western plains of ours.
Cheeseparing out here, amid this boun
teous nature, looks as ridiculous as the
tactics of the Bt. Joseph mlrer.
"There are, you know, two famous mis
ers In 81. Joseph two old bachelors, of
course. The old miser called on the
younger the other night and found him
slttlna In the dark. He lit up, however,
when he found there was a mortgage paper
to be examined. Yes, he lit up a small
candle. But as soon as this paper wis
read through he blew out the candle
act. In.
" 'Why did you do that?' his guest, a
little offended, askod.
" 'Now. my dear sir." said the host, "can't
we taJk jut as well in the dark? Of
course we can. and think how it saves the
cat die.'
80 they talked on. Money, money.
menc-y. Rut the host noticed strange
sounds coming from his guest's chair
strange creaks and rustlings and at last
lie said:
"'What are you doll g there, anyway?
" 'Why said the other, 'it's dark and
nobody can see me, so I thought I'd take
off sny trousers and save ear and tear.' "
Washington Herald.
Gsu to the Esd. .
Prosecutor Bovel of Camden tells a
stcry which he says happened at Qnose
Keg Cove, on the New Jersey side ot
Pelaware bay. The farmers from miles
round take their families to the cove
in the summer for a picnic.
Last lummer among the crowd was one
Camden ccunty man who had drunk too
much 8alem county app'ejack. He mado
himself obnoxious, by going to the men
s they were with their womenfolk, and
shaking his fist under their noses, say
ing. "I can lick you. Come . out and
flgut." No one would fight, because he
was evidently drunk.'
Convinced that he had scared them all.
he walked up and down the beach, say
ing, "I can lick any one cn the beach."
He repeated this to every one he met
Finally an Inoffensive little family man
standing with a group Jumped Into him
and beat him Into submission. When he
was finally allowed to get up, the Cam
den mas struggled to bis faet, and. look
ing around at the crowd which had gath
ered, he said defiantly:
"Me and this little feller can lick any
man cn the beach."
Reasons for Ualttiasr Polplt.
Bishop Willard Francis Mallalieu of the
Methodist Episcopal church la opiosed to
the diminutive salaries that congregations,
able to do better, sometimes pay -their
pastors. "I once knew an excellent young
man," said he, one day In Boston. "He
was In the church, just married, on a small
salary, but contented and happy. Twelve
or fifteen years went by. I had lost sight
of this young minister forgotten him, as
we all do sometimes when suddenly I met
him on Tremont street, dressed well, but
not at all clerically.
"We shook hands. He sild he was doing
excellently.
" 'What church?' I said.
" 'Oh, he said, no church the wholesale
hat business.'
" 'But why did you leave the church?' I
asked.
" 'For seven reasons,' said he.
" 'And what,' said I, 'were they?'
" "A wife,' he answered, 'and six chil
dren.' "New York Bun.
Teed It lr m Paae.
Bpeaklng about the handwriting which
Is bard to read, an old-time conductor on
the Louisville Nashville railroad told a
story about James Outhrle. Mr. GuUirle,
besides being secretay of the treasury un
der James Buchanan, was also president of
the Louisville & Nashville railroad and a
resident of Louisville.
In the early days of railroading there
were no printed passes as at present, and
Mr. Outhrle would frequently write a pass
for a friend pn a scrap of paper. The con
ductors on the road would honor these, of
course, but one farmer carried a piece of
paper purposing to be a pass for a friend
on a scrap of paper. The conductor hon
ored It, but later grew suspicious, and one
day took It up. He carried it to the office
of President Outhrle and said:
"A farmer has been riding on this pass
for about a year. Do you want him lo
continue to use It?"
President Outhrle put on his glasses,
louked the paper over .carefully and aald:
"Why, this is not a pass. It is a receipt
I gave a fellow for a load ot wood about
a year ago." Louisville Courier-Journal.
Obrrlns; Doctor's Orders.
A prominent physician of Baltimore tel's
of an amusing experience of the early days
of his practice when he was residing In a
small town where by far the majority of
the workers were coal miners.
"1 was greatly distressed by the Insani
tary conditions prevailing In their cot
tageu," says the doctor, "und among ether
things I tried to explain to each household
the Importance of maintaining a whole
some atmosphere In the sleeping rooms. I
laid In a stock of thermometers, which
were distributed to the households where
they were mtst needed. I took pains to
point out to each family In turn Just how
the thermometer would indicate the proper
degree of temperature.
"As I was making the rounds ono day I
inquired of the woman at the head of one
establishment, wherein I observed my ther
mometer proudly displayed at the end of a
string, whether she had followed my In
structions. " 'Yes, sir," answered she, 'I'm very
careful about the temperature. I watch
the thing all the time as it hangs up
there.'
" 'What do you do when the tempera
ture rises above 68?'
" 'I take It down, sir, an' put It outside
till it cools off a bit." "Newark Star.
Putting It Gently.
The sages of the general store were dis
cussing the veracity of old Si Perkins, when
Uncle Bill Abbott ambled in.
"What do you think about it, Uncle Bill?"
they asked him. "Would you call 81 Per
kins a liar?"
"Wall,"' answered Uncle Bill slowly, as he
thoughtfully studied the celling. "I don't
know as I'd go so far as to call him a
liar exactly, but I do know this much
when feedln' time comes. In order to get
any response from his hogs, he has to get
somebody else to call 'em for him." Every
body's Magastne.
Clergyman Sqnelches a Pantheist.
In the town where the Rev. Dr. Emmons
was pastor, lived a physician tinctured with
the grossest form of pantheism, who de
clared that if he ever met Dr. Emmons he
would easily floor him In argument. One
day they met at the bom of a patient. The
physician abruptly asked Dr. Emmons:
"How old are you, sir?"
The doctor, astonished at his rudeness,
quietly replied, "Sixty-two; may I ask, sir,
how long you have lived?"
"Since the creation," was the pantheist's
reply.
"Ah, I suppose, then, you were in the
garden of Eden with Adam and Eve?"
"I was there, sir."
"Well." said the wily divine, "we all
know there was third person present.
Nashville Banner.
Information Wanted.
Patrick Murphy, while passing down the
street, 'Was hit on the head by a brick,
which fell from a building In process of
construction. One of the first things he did
after being taken home and put to bed was
to send for a lawyer. A few days later he
received word to call, as his lawyer had
settled the case. He called and received
five crisp, new $100 bills.
"How much did you get?" he asked.
"Two thousand dollars," answered the
lawyer.
"Two thousand dollars, and you give me
loOO. Say, who got hit by that brick, you
or me?" Boston Herald.
New Alternating Cnrrent Motor.
A Glasgow firm has placed on the mar
ket an alternating current Induction motor
ot novel design. Intended largely for tex
tile mills, although equally applicable to
other kinds of driving. In Induction motors
the main magnetic field between the rotor
and the stator revolves at a certain fixed
speed, and. electrically. It la Immaterial
whether the stator or the rotor revolves
with the. field. In starting an Induction
motor with the load on a great deal of
current is required. But In the new motor
the ordinary rotor which drives the shaft
ing and machines Is not started first; In
stead the ordinary stator la perm tted to
start, and, as It has no load, It takes very
little current. When It arrives at full speed
a brake Is gradually applied lo It. and as
Its speed falls the rotor gains speed In the
opposite direction of rotation, so as to
maintain the Kume relative speed between
them. Finally, wImui the ststor Is held fast
by the biakc, the rotor has aUiilurd Us full
speed, and this without taking an excessive
starting current.
Heaven or Algiers.
A celebrated Anglican divine, the late
Bishop of Rochester, who had been ailing
for some months, decided to consult Sir
Frederick Treves, the noted surgeon. After
a careful examination. Sir Frederick pro
nounced his verdict and added: "Your
lordship must go to Algiers or some winter
resort on the Riviera."
"Impossible," replied the bishop; "quite
Impossible. I have too much work to
get through."
"Well," said the doctor, "you must make
your choice. It's either Algiers or heaven."
"Dear me!" exclaimed the bishop with a
algh; "then I suppose It must be Algiers."
Success Magasine.
Frightened Into Fits
by fear of appendicitis, take Dr. King's
New Life Plils and away goes bowel
trouble. Guaranteed. 2Cc For sale by Beaton
Drug Co. J