10 THK OMAHA DATLY BEE: SATURDAY. OCTOBER 3, ISOS. Hie Omaha Daily Dee FOUNDED BT F.UWABt) F.OSKWATEIl ' vicron nosKjvATF.n. editor. Entered at Omaha postofrice i second elsss matter. TERMS OP HfBSCT.irTION: felly Bee (wiirevil Sunday), rpe yr Dally Bee and Puuduy, one vmr SOT DELIVERED BT CAItMEH. Dally Bee (Including Sunlafl. per week.. 13a Dally (without Bun'ay. p"r week...!' Evening Few (without und.i, Ior wrtg be Evening Be (with Sunday), eer wefc...l c Binday Bee. one year tafurday ilo, on year ' AildreM all complaints of Irregularities ta delivery to Ctiy Circulation Department. OFFICES: Omaha Tbe Bee Bui'dlng. South Omaha-Vwrntyfiurth and W. Council Bluff' Srntt rtret. . Chicago IMS Marnuette B illrtlitf . N.w York-Rooms H01-Uu2. No. 31 w Thirty-third Street. , v, . Washington-T fourteenth Street. N. vt . CORRESPONDENCE. ' Communications relating to new and editorial matter ho:d bo address!. Omaha Be. Editorial Department. REMITTANCES. Remit by draft, express poi"' payable to The Bee Publishing Company Onlv -eent stamps received In payment or mall account. Personal chccki. erenpt t n Otnaha or eastern exchanges, not accept n. STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION. Stat of Nebraska. Douglas County. : Ueorgo B. Tsschuck. treasurer of The Dea publishing company. being duly worn, aaya that the actual number of full and complete cop! of T"e M . Morning, Evening and Sunday Bee printed during the month of September. I90S, waa aa foflowa: 1 38.000 18 t 37,860 17 ,300 l scoeo n a,340 4 88480 1 a370 S 38,140 iO 36,000 M.70O 21 7 38,630 22 9fiSa 38,810 11 38,480 38,840 24 38.680 10 88,810 2. 36,480 11 , 34,660 2 38.480 13 38,800 IT tT,700 i 38.800 21 36,440 14 36,380 it 38,490 n ,3to to ae,voo ToUIb X.oe,380 Less unaold and returned coplea. . ,37 Net total X.088.863 lally average 88,333 GEORGE B. TZSCHl'CK. Treasurer. Subscribed In my presence and "worn to before me thla lit day of October 10S. 8el.) ROBERT HUNTER. v ' Notary Public. WHEW OUT or TQWIf. abacrtbers teaflag tb etty orarllr shoal have Be alia to tfcaaa. ASSraae will be etaag4 aa oftea aa raaaaateaU Last call for the base ball fan. Mr. Taft'8 western lour Is stirring them up all right. May King Ak-Sar-Ben's glory never be lens bright than it is. While on the subject of names, Ohoopee, Ga., has Just voted itself dry. As the freshman In the electoral col lege, Oklahoma may naturally expect a basing. Democratic politicians would rather talk about a full dinner pail than a full oil can. Ralsuli, the Moroccan bandit, has disappeared. It Is to be hoped that he will remain so. Notice how enthusiastically Gov ernor Johnson of Minnesota Is keeping still about Bryan T "Taft stin hunts the lairs of the en emy," says the Chicago Tribune. Also the liars of the enemy. Financiers who are attempting to re organise the Fish trust are finding an unusually light crop of suckers. At least Mr. Bryan can not accuse Mr. Roosevelt of being a dilatory cor respondent. . He answers all letters promptly. At last reports the democratic ship was still safe in Standard Oil harbor, although the purser waa recently lost overboard. The weather man may now turn on tho "wet" spout and give the state the drenching it needs before cold weather comes. Ak-Sar-Ben visitors see Omaha at its best, but whenever they return at any season of the year they will find It almost equally as good. Mr. Bryan pleads ignorance of Gov ernor Haskell's corporation connec tions. Mr. Bryan has to either plead Ignorance or plead guilty. Senator Gore of Oklahoma is stand ing loyally by Governor Haskell. Sen ator Gore, it will be remembered, has been blind for many years. Mr. Bryan says the Roosevelt ad ministration has not harmed the trusts. The trusts doubtless wish they could feel the same way about it. Some new oil Melds have been dis covered in Illinois, but they are not causing as much excitement as the dis covery of some pew oil letters. By attacking Governor Hughes, Mr. Bryaa has simply added to the repub lican plurality that wlil be piled up in the Empire state next month. One of the pitchers of the St. Louis Browns is going to sing in grand opera this winter. It will give h!m ODuor- tunlty to keep on practicing the proper pitch. "What ia stronger than the touch of nature?" aeks writer in the Wash ington Herald. Well, there's the touch of the campaign committee, for one thing. Mr. HUgen is a viollulct and, al though he is the presidential candidate H of the independence party, be appears to be pUylog second fiddle to Mr. Hearst, THK RtKiSPtVKLT PVLICIFS. Mr. Bryan evidently had the Denver platform In mind when he made his claim heirship of the Roosevelt pol icies, or he may have bad his claim In mind when he framed the platform to make It accord with the policies of the president, in striking contrast with former positions of the democratic party on the Issues in question. On the pension question, for Instance, the Denver platform says: We favor e generous pension policy, both an a matter of Justice to the sur viving veterans and their dependents and because It tend to relieve the country of the necessity of maintaining a large standing army; Commendable as the attitude may be, it it in direct conflict with the long-established policy of the demo cratic party, which has always fought pension legislation bitterly. The pay ment of service pensions, the Increase of pensions to soldiers' widows and the general liberality in rewarding the nation's defenders have been a part of the Roosevelt policies. The democrats are Just now in favor of encouraging better relations be tween the United States and Latin American countries. The Denver plat form declarea; The democratic party recognizes the Im portance and advanugo of developing cIost ties of pan-American friendship and commerce between the United States and Its sister nations of Latin America. This 'is complete and emphatic re pudiation of the democratic opposition to such policies that was started when Mr. Blaine, an recretnry of state, in augurated the pan-American policy that has borne such ripe reward in en larged trade and general world ad vancement. Tho policy has been urged and advanced by President Roosevelt and Secretary Root in face of bitter democratic opposition in both brrnches of congress. The value and, merit of the policy has finally forced even democratic endorsement. No longer ago than in 1S00 Mr. Bryan stumped the country denounc ing the republican party for increas ing the navy and army and preparing for the nation's proper place in the affairs of world powers. He was con vinced that the nation was scheduled for destruction unless the army were disbanded and the navy dismantled. He had the support of every demo cratic spellbinder in the country, Just as democrats in congress have opposed an adequate army and navy since the dayr when they declared in their na tional platform that the war to pre serve the union was a failure. Tet the democratic platform at Denver en dorsed another Roosevelt policy by declaring: ' We believe that the interests of this country would be best served by having a navy sufficient to defend the coasts of this country and protect American cltl sens wherever their rights may be in Jeopardy. There is some sentiment in the coun try for changing the name of the Pan ama canal and calling it the Roosevelt canal. The honor would be fitting, for it is known to all Americans that the president practically forced congress to order canal construction, after it had been held up by transcontinental railroad interests for more than a gen eration. The records of congress show that practically all the opposition to the construction of the canal at Pan ama, or its construction at all, came from democratic sources. Yet the Den ver platform declares: We believe the Panama canal will prove of, great value to our country and favor Its speedy completion. ' The democratic party la following Mr. Bryan's example In trying to run away from Its own record. CHJMP CLARK S CAMPAIGN. Champ Clark, the leather-lunged congressman from Pike count', Mis souri, deserves credit for introducing a novelty in the campaigning line. Champ Is taking no chances with cam paign treasurers or managers who may be found to have pipe line connections with any trust headquarters. He Is asking no -help from spellbinders who might get their elocutionary trolleys crossed and offer some argument to the democrats of Missouri prepared for consumption east of the Alle ghenles. He wants to be re-elected to congress and he proposes to Invest $1,800 to that end along novel and attractive lines. He proposes to wring pledges of support from the voters, but to do it in such a way that they will insist that they like it. According to the Kansas City Star, Mr. Clark will offer in each of the nine counties of his district a series of five prizes to the young women who se cure the largest number of written pledges to support him and his party In the forthcoming election. The con test is open only to unmarried women between the ages of 16 and 30 Just aa it there were any unmarried women over 30 in Missouri. The capital prise in each county is to be f 100; the sec ond. $50; the third, $25; the fourth, $15, and the last $10. Each young woman must obtain as many signatures as she can to a card carrying the fol lowing pledge: I hereby pledge my aacred word of honor to vote for Champ Clark and the balance of tha democratic tkk-t In th fi:rthc:mlng presidential and congressional ele tlcna. To make the pledge h'ndlng, each cird, must bear the name and post- office address of the voter and the ad dress of the young woman who gets credit for capturing the pledge. As Clark's district is normally dem ocratic by a large majority, the repub licans may as well concede his elec tlon and congratulate themselves that the scheme originated In a democratic district instead of In a section where the republicans might have a fighting chance, for It Is difficult to imagine anything that cfuld counteract such electioneering tactics. Any man, mar ried or single, who fails to fall a prey to this organized band of pretty vote huntresses will probably be unable to muster cournge enough to go to the polls. There In only one flaw In Clark's scheme, end his opponent may jet make a showing by taking advantage of it. Clark has barred all but single women from Ms list of campaigners. If his opponent Will only rnlist the widows, the fight may not be lost, or at least the republicans may prevent Champ's election from being unan imous. Incldortally, v,e put it up to Mr. Bryan whether this ia not a form of bribery that but thinly veils the tur chase of votes in blocks of five and multiples thereof. KPPKVT OF THK TAFT 01'lt. That the tourof Judge Taft through the western states Is having a marked effect in strengthening his candidacy before the people is plainly apparent from the enthusiastic recep tlons accorded him at every point. This is particularly true in Ne braska, where his advent has proved a stimulus all along the line, inspiring every one who has come in contact with the candidate with a thorough appreciation of his strong personality. Judge Taft'a moat striking charac teristic is his convincing earnestness and manifest sincerity. Without pre tending to be endowed with great ora torical powers, he talks to the people as sensible men and women, appealing to theix judgment, with no attempt to Inflame their passions or prejudices, and resting the case with them as a Jury bound to reach a verdict for the best interests and prosperity of the whole country. Judge Taft stands upon Ms own record and with the record of the re publican pasty. .Without claiming perfection, he has nothing In his rec ord to take back or apologize for, which is in striking contrast with the record of his particular opponent, who is trying to make the people forget all the democratic mis-steps and false prophesies of the last twelve years. It would be an Insult to popular in telligence if such an appeal to solid, sober thought, against the fake Issues and cure-all nostrums of the' demo cratic candidate and his platform, did not produce salutary results. FIOilTlXO THK DRUG HABIT. Public approval will be generously accorded the resolutions adopted at the national convention of the Wholesale Druggists' Association of America pledging support to police efforts to check the Improper use of opium, chloral, cocaine and like drugs. The "drug habit" has not attained dangerous proportions in the west, al though the police records show the number of users of opium and other nerve-destroying narcotics Is increas ing each year. Ia some of the larger eastern cities, notably New York and Philadelphia, the use of these drugs has become so common as to be a real menace. Police attempt to suppress their use have not been markedly suc cessful, as unscrupulous druggists and physicians have made it easy for dope "fiends" to secure their favorite poi son without much danger of detection. Some manufacturers who should be in Jail have even gone to the, extent of putting nostrums on the market, under disguises that make cocaine and similar poisons as easy to obtain as matches. In the south the negroes have become habitual users of these insidious drugs, with a result that is shown forcibly In the Increase of crimes, while in the big cities the drug habit is increasing in spite of efforts at repression. The drug habit, it appears, can not be cured by the victims. The "dope fiend" soon losej power to save himself and the work of reclamation must bs done by others. The Chinese have finally awakened to this fact and are employ ing most drastic measures to prevent the use or sale of opium and like drugs in the celestial kingdom, which has been tottering under the load for 300 years. The action of the wholesale druggists is a welcome step in the di rection of a moral crusade and one that should be followed up by retail druggists everywhere. Mr. Bryan draws a Una of very fine distinction v,hon he Bays that the $15,- 000 given to "Brother-in-Law Tom" Allen in 1904 to pave the way for the election of Mr. Bryan as Uulted States senator from Nebraska was not given to the state fund by Ryan, but came out of the general national committee fund, where it had been put by Mr. Ryan. Mr. Bryan may convince him self that tainted Wall street money becomes deodorized In transit, but he will not be able to persuade unbiased people to ?srt with him. Tho intelligent workingman is going to decide what is for hla best interest in the comlug election and not let any one else decide for him. In coming to his decision, furthermore, he ia going to give more weight, as Judge Taft advises, to what the respectlva political parties have done for labor rather than to what they promise to do merely to catch tho labor vote. The New York World, which is try ing hard to support Bryan, refuses to stand for the candidate's explanation of the Hakell Incident, but declares that "Mr. Bryan inunt have Known Haskell's record when he assumed per sonal responsibility for the man. It he did not it vins because he had chosen to be a fugitive from informa tion." " A New York man fouud a pocket book containing $20 and gave it to a stranger, who said his wife had lost It. Later the stranger returned the purse and mouey, saying they did not belong to his wife and now the want ads of the newspapers are being used to locate the owner of the property. That's the kind of men Mr. Bryan ought to get on his campaign commit tee, . . . One of the delegates to the League of American Municipalities told Judge Taft that his Omaha Auditorium speech had well repaid him for com ing 500 miles to this city. The local Bryanite organ does not care to quote that particular delegate. Figures returned by the city build ing department show that Omaha has kept going ahead steadily in spite of alleged hard times. The evidences of the city's growth are substantial piles, occupied by busy merchants or happy homes. Prof. H. H. Wilder of Smith college Is said to have discovered a method of restoring the shrunken features of mummies to their original shape and color. He could maka more of a hit by discovering some method of remov ing oil stains without publicity. In the meantime, the money col lected by Governor Haskoil for the democratic campaign fund is being used by Mr. Bryan and his associates, regardless of the suspicion of its origin. An English nobleman, proud but poor, has married an English woman, also poor, refusing to consider any overtures from American heiresses. He should have a Carnegie hero medal prepared. The convention of the League of American Municipalities is developing the fact that there are several ways of governing a city. Also the fact that the experts are not wholly agreed as to which Is the right one. "People should not be asked to be lieve thot Mr. Taft is a mere vulgar boodler." writes Willis J. Abbott. The people have not been asked to believe anything of the kind, and would not believe it if they were asked. Mr. Gomper8 has effected an alli ance between the farmers' union and the labor organizations in Texas. It is feared that Texas will go democratic this year. Omaha has again proved its capac ity for entertaining large crowds, and none of the thousands who were here during the week has gone away dis appointed. Colonel Bryan would rather not talk about that $15,000 jackpot which "Brother-in-Law Tom" Allen ex tracted in his name from the Ryan boodle fund in. 1904. Aa Agreeable Sarprlae. Chicago Tribune. Some persona seemed to be surprised to find that Gov. Hughes. In addition to be ing a first class governor, Is one of the moBt effective campaign speakers In the country. Why This SelflshaesaT Chicago News. How much longer will bankers' associa tions oppose postal savings banks on the ground that people are entitled to nothing better In the way of banking facilities than they have already? Aaaertlona M'lthoat Proof. St. Louis Globe Democrat. Col. Bryan contends that he Is the orig inator of all the reforms now being agi tated in the country, and Insists that he can administer them better than tha oppo sition candidates. There Is nothing In his career as a lawyer, an editor, a legislator, a lecturer, or a candidate to prove this. '' A 0ln of be Times. Springfield Republican. Steerage travel Into the country continues t a very low figure, as heretofore since the panic, but there Is a reduction In the outward movement of unemployed aliens, so that tho two movements- are Just now about eiual. Thla la reflective of better conditions of employment in the United States. At least, there Is no longer such a pressure of unemployment as to drive alien workers abroad In numbers far ex ceeding the current volume of Immigra tion. Origin of the Democratic Rose, Kansas City Star. Do you remember the "American Beauty" cartoon of a couple of years ago. Illustrat ing young Rockefeller's justification of the Oil trust? The son of the richest man had told how the buds of the American Beauty roes were nipped all but one In order that the one might be perfected. The car toonist represented Standard Oil aa the on big bloom, Rockefeller as tha gardener, scissors In hand, end tha crushed com petitors as the severed buds. Well, la It not an Ironical experience for the demo cratic party that Its official campaign book, published before the llaskell-Stan-dard Oil revelations, has this cartoon re produced on the back cover? rULlTUAl, DKIKT. Political corporations are convinced that converaatlon is more edifying than letter writing. So tar as history goes, Governor Haskell's fame la secure. He has written the songs of Ms party. Conrad Kohrs of Montana, will be re membered as the man who lifted the ltd of the ginger can. SenMor Tillman Un't saying a word, but Is enjuylr.g Ufa abroad almost as well as If he w on the campaign firing line. Mr. Kern explains the possession of a railroad pass by saying, he was ct one time en. i loved as attorney for a railroad cor poration. This Is another Idol shattered. Onci, of the candidates for governor In Gvcryii has been indicted for tarrying a gi:n. Al the same time a northern editor of a half a dxm pipers got about the country throwing bomb. The eweet singer of Okluhuma exudes melody al every pure, even though the prtHsure of tho pipe line has been reduced. Charlie cannot be hushed whilo atmosphere moves in the sooner stale. A polulisl It-ague In California asked Congressman Nuvdliam several questions, practically demanding a pledge from him as to the stand he would take In congress on several matters. He replied by quot ing a section from the pohthal code of California which makes It unlawful for can didates to answer such questions and for voters to ask them, oTMicn i. a mi Tin orns. Every by-election held In England sines the Liberal landslide of two years ago registers a recession of popular sentiment The recent election at Newrastla-On-TVns docs not differ In results from those pre ceding, and attempts of party organs to minimise the effect are distressing and futile. A vsrlety of local Issues enter Into these contests, the chief factor being dis appointment over promises unrealised and opposition to liberal legislative measures. In the Newcastle election. In which the liberal candidate was routed, three ele mnnts were dominant opposition to the pending rlquor licensing bill 111 feeling caused by the partial suppression nt the Catholic procession In London, and the socialistic tendencies of the labor parly, The latter was In reality the determining factor. Tha labor vote, allied with the liberal party, at the general election, de serted their allies at Newcastle and gave over 2, mo votes to the soclaJIstlo labor candidate. Had thla vote stood an formerly with the liberals, the party would have won. The Unionists profited by tha split. The fact remains, however, that liberal party strength, aa shown at tha general election. Is steadily declining. Tha tetal number of votes at the last general elec tion constituencies which since then have had by-elections was: Liberals, 228,994; Unionists, 174,678. The figures In the same districts at subsequent by-elections were! Liberal, 189,748; Unionists. SOl.ltt. Evidence of modern progress In China crops out in unexpected directions. The custom of extorting confessions from ac cused persons, by administering what has coma to be known In this country as tha "third degree," has been In vogue In China for centuries, but the practice there Is torture. The North China Herald pub lishes a decree from the ministry of Justice Instructing court officials to discontinue the practice. Any official found disobeying Is to bo cashiered and punished. Tha Herald says: "Magistrates unlawfully torture the prisoner for tha -sake of eliciting a confes sion of guilt or Information concerning his accomplices, and Jailer Illegally torture him for the purpose of extorting money. The kinds of torture used are now few, and the torment caused Is often excruciating and revolting beyond description. The well-known Turkish soldier and statesman, Fuad Pasha, has experienced strange vicissitudes of fortune. Only a few weeks ago he was in solitary confine ment at Damascus, now he Is laden with public honors. At Beirut ha had an ex traordinary reception. The German em peror was welcomed by tho most Important officials of the empire and with all possible military pomp. But Fuad waa received by tho people. On the afternoon of his ar rival they hurried in thousands to the rail way station at tho port and filled every possible space within half a mile of the train. Many carried flags anf banners, and songs of welcome were sung. As tha train move! slowly in, hundreds clambered to the roofs of the cars, while a of heads surged round them In every direction, every one struggling to get a glimpse of the re turning exile and helping to swell the shout of "Long live Kuad Pasha!" The French government has at last de cided to take definite action against the practice of opium-smoking, which appears to have attained alarming proportions at Toulon. Tho difficulty Is to apply effec tively the law of 1845 against tha sale and purchase of poisonous substance A de cree based upon this law has been drawn up and will be issued very soon. Mean while, the naval and police authorities at Toulon are making such Investigations as they can In suspected quarters, but, owing to the ease with which the practice of cplum-smoklng can be concealed, their task has not been easy. Tha revelations mado In the case of the traitor Ullmo. who waa a confirmed opium-smoker, have directed especial attention to the prevalence of this habit, and the authorities are determined to use every means In their power to sup press1 it as a national evil. Under the heading "8even Mora" a French newspaper recently published tha following from a Monte Carlo correspond ent: "There Is a slight reduction In the number of suicides for the current week. Of the seven unhappy ones whom the ban dits of Mone Carlo have hurried to their death after first robbing them, four have hamzed themselves In the cfLrdMn And nnm has hanged himself fn his room at tha Hotel da Parts. Thla last one was cut down, nearly dead, and taken to the hos pital at Monaco, where ha Is being caret for In tha greatest secrecy. A woman also has poisoned herself at Monaco, only a few steps from the museum that was raised to his own glory by Albert I. Still another, a young man, 30 years old, shot himself dead on Monday evening at 9 o'clock on one of the benches fronting the great stair case of the Casino. And yet among the statesmen who meet regularly at The Hague to combat tha scourge of war, not a single delegate has yet dreamed of suggest ing the suppression of the slaughter house of Monaco." If the Italian newspapers are pot ro mancers of our own yellow-journal typa, there has been an amasing automobile tragedy near Albenga, a city not far from Genca. An engineer who was spending the Bummer there returned recently from a long walk. As he approached his villa, his 6-year-old son noticed him and hurried to welcome his father. At that moment an automobile containing a chauffeur and two daughters of the Marquis Revedln, turned a nearby comer at high spsed. In vain tha engineer tried to warn tha chauffeur of his child's danger. Without reducing his epeed the chauffeur drove on and struck and killed the child. Tha erased father, so runs the story, then drew his revolver and his second shot passed thiough the body of one of the girls and into tha brain of the chauf feur. The automobile, deprived of lis driver, dashed Into tha cliff along tha road fatally Injuring the other sister. Mildew has caused so great loss In tha vineyards of the Champagne district In Franca that tha land taxea have been re mitted on evory plot affected. The total champagne vintage this year will yield 3.0011,000 hectoliters, or considerably less than .half the average. However, the an nuxl aale of champagne being (8,000,000 bottles, and the principal houses of Rhlin and Eperaay having on hand 111.000,000 bottles In reserve, tha world will get. Its uguM supply, and, we are told, without any Increase ' In price. Thera are several families In almost any city who don't cure what champagne costs, anyway. M At the commencement of tha present year the number of pensioners on' the official insurance lists of the German empire for Invalidism, old age and sickness amounted to PTK.WO. of whom Ml. 693 were Invalid pensioners, 20,0P1 sick pensioners and 118, -H87 old-age pensioners. The sum paid to pensluncnt in 19C7 Is estimated at 172.000,000 inaiks. and since the existent of the Institution at 1.31S.0uO.oon marks. In 17, m.OnO.POO marks were paid In. The total assets amount'to l.SMS.buo.ono marks. II amor, of tha Casapalga. Baltimore American. But Isn't It a tittle funny that Hkei should have been bounced If he Is tnno. cent? And Un't it a Utile funny that Mr. Bryan should set up- such a- howl about blm if be Is guilty T Absolutely pure ; V Bdkiiflngj Powder Made from Royal Grape Cream of Tartars Royal gives to food that pecu liar lightness, sweetness, and delicious flavor noticed in the finest bread, cake, biscuit, rolls, crusts, etc., which expert pas try cooks declare is unobtain able When any other leavening agent is used. SOVAl SAKINU powoea CO SJtW VORK CAMPAIGN ECOVOMY. Washington Star. We've started In campaigning down to To- hlck on tha crick; We wanted some excitement an' we got It purty quick. We found that funds were comln' In ra luctant lllfe an" slow An people didn't seem to take much In terest in tna snow. So ol' Joe Struthers says, "It's true that money talks a hean. But at the present time it 'pears like money's gone to sleep. An' If this here community's to keep Us proper tone, I reckon that we'll have to do some talkln' or our own. So ol' Joe started In an' Intimated he had heard As how SI Simllng should be called a short an' ugly word. An' 81, he ris right up with anger far too great tn smother, An' logically proved that ol' Joe Struthcri was another. An' everybody said that whilo 'twas sad to have a row, Twss far more Interestln than the tariff, anyhow. An' now we've got excitement till we're thoroughly content. An' tha principal advantage la, It hasn't cost a cent; LINKS TO A SMILE. TJe man dat thinks he haa a walkover." said Uncle Bben, "is liable to git to takin' things so easy an' slow dat de fua' thing he knows he gits run over hlsself." Washington Star. "Bligglns says there are no great orators nowadays." no." answered senator Horgnum, "when man has anything to say he puts it Into the newspapers so quick that It's a back number by the time it comes out on the slump." Washington Star. Tha feat' of the rider In the old tourna ment who unhorsed his opponent In tha lists was iKe our great modern holiday. , in wnai wayr "Wasn't it taking a knight off?" Bal timore American. " . "If thera is to be a speed limit to travel In tha air, how would they ever enforce It?" "Easily." "How could they police the air?" "With fly cops." Baltimore American. "I never saw such a storm In all my life." "Pardon me, my friend, since you 'saw' tho storm, no doubt you can tell us what color It was." 'Certainly! The wind blew and tha storm rose, you ninny !" Boston Transcript. Goodman Gonrong I've had the offer of Job an I've a great mind to go to work. 8aymold Storey I alwus knowed ther" wua a yeller streak In you. Chicago Tribune. Trust Magnate Vour services are valua ble to us, and we are willing to pay hand somely for them. But why do you Insist that all our negotiations shall be In the sign language? Rising Young Lawyer Because, my dear sir, some day I may want to run for of ficeBaltimore American. "Tha scientists are now wondering how long a butterfly con go without food." "Not above four - hours, and then they are constantly wanting bonbons and Ice dOSSBTT ME TO TRANSMIT ALL THE POWER, tha fric tion, drive) of a motor a net bo neither too tight or too loose, but just right; Baeaas it fits just right at 0Viy pmlnt, tho CROS5ETT Shoo puts ovary volt that's la your body at your sarvico. SOLD IN EVERY qOWtf $4 and 5$ LEWIS A-CROSS ETT. In., North A king too, Mm. HAYDEN BROTHERS OMAHA AK-SAR-BEW PIAWO A. HOSPE CO.. Omaha n cream between meals."- I. ou svillo Courier Journal. Mr. Ci'lmsonback What lu the world's tho matter with this shirt? Mrs. Crlmsonback Oh, I guess the girl boiled It a little too long, dear, that's all. Mr. Crlmsonback Lmiks to me as If shu had fried It! Yonkers Statesman. "A heap o' men," said Uncle Kbcn. "gits a reputation foh great wisdom by per tendin' to know mo' dan dey does un' den persuadln' you to blame yoh Own Ig'nunco foh not comprehendln' delr ex planations." Washington Star. "I met a lawyer frlnd this morning who made a most extraordinary confession for a professional man." "What was it?" "lie admitted t. me that Ills case hadn't a leg to stand on." "How odd In him to admit it. What kind Of a case was It?" . "His old bookcase." Baltimore American. The Pessimist Thlj Is tile last look ul the summer sea. The Optimist Think of the beauty of the winter's anow. Perfect Satisfaction That is what we guarantee and It is what you are sure to get at any of the stores o" Browning, King & Co. fro.i: Boston to Omaha. There is great distinct it j, In the style in which our i-'nl'. Overcoats are draped an fitted. , Suits $16.00 to $35.00. Overcoats $15.00 to $45.00. BrewmngKing Company V Fifteenth and Douglas St. OMAHA R. 8. WILCOX, Manager. "MAKES LIFE'S , EASY ACENTO 1515 Douglas Street !P5 to , aa i, hi r iv m iaraiaxT,r"rTOg TTiiaJ