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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 13, 1908)
TirE OMAHA SUNDAY BEE: SEPTEMBER 13. 190. The Omajia Sunday: Be& FOUNDED BT EDWARD ROSFTWATER VICTOR ROBEWATDR, EDITOR. Entrd at Omaha postotflre as aeconj rlan mattar. TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION: Pally B- (without Sunday), one year..! Daily he and Sunday, om year W DELIVERED HV CARKIKU: Daily B- (liu-ludln Sunday), tr k..ft Daily H! (without Sunday), per wwk.. .l'-o Evtnln fle (without Kitnday). p?r w"k Kvnln- Bi (with fHinUay), per wwlcl'V Sinday Bj-, onn yar ' f-attirday Br, ono year 1-W Addrrna all romplnlntM of IrrogillnritkA In delivery to City Circulation Department. OFFICKS: Omaha Thu Be Building. Ponth Omaha Twntv-fourth and N. C'oiinrll Bluff 16 B'ott Ftrrt. Chicago -164J Mnrqutte Building. Nw York-Rooma 1101-1102, No. 31 Welt Thirty-third Btrwat. Waahlngton-726 Fourteenth Street, X. W. CORRESPONDENCE. Communkatlona relating to news and editorial matter should be addressed: Omaha Bee, Editorial Department. REMITTANCES. Remit hv rlraft. express or postal order payable to The Bee Publishing; Company. Onlv 2-rent stamps received In payment of mall account. Personal checks, except en Omaha or eastern exchanges, not accepted. STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION, flat of Nebraska, Doug-las County, : Osorgs B. Tzschuck. treasurer of The Bee Publishing company, beln duly worn, -ays that the actual number of full and complete copies of The Dally, Morning. Evening snd Sunday Bee, printed during the month of August, 1908. was as lonows: 1 36,130 t 88,930 I...... 3S.B80 4..... 30,640 1 38,790 1 3S,70 1 38,900 I,,,. 30,470 1 35,700 10 36,639 11 '.. 39,410 11 30,010 J 1 33,980 14 30,070 II 38,870 IT 30,400 U 36,110 19 30,070 20 35,990 21 35,880 J 2 30,070 13 35,400 24 30,050 25 .. 38,940 2 .16,140 27 36,010 21 36,030 2 30,450 10 3800 11 80,190 II 38,000 TOtali 1,117.000 Lis unsold and returned copies. . 11,844 Net total 1,105,464 Tally average 35,059 GEORGE B. TZSCHUCK. Treasurer. Subscribed In my presence a,nd sworn to before me this 1st day of September. 1J08. (Seal.) ROBERT HUNTKK. Notary Fubllo. WHEN OUT OF TOWN. Sabarrlbcrs leaving; the city tem porarlly shoo Id have The Bee mailed to them. Address will be changed as often as reqaested. The anti-noise campaign Is not cre ating any disturbance. King Corn will now be prepared to give the laugh to Jack Frost. Airship experts report that there Is still plenty of room at the top. Dlrectoire trousers for men are now proposed. Still, folks wonder at crime. Has anyone . stopped to Inquire where Poultney Bigelow stands In this campaign? No independent telephone franchise this year for Congressman Hitchcock to hitch to. The ministers returning from their vacations find that Satan remained on the job all summer. Prof. Muskett of Australia says we eat too much. Prof. Muskett should keep still when bo is loaded. "The Bon i an Order of BatB" is the name of a new secret society. Candi date Chafln is not a member. It. is easy enough to see through the wiles of the window glass manu facturers who are planning a combine. Dr. Wiley Is planning to make alco hol out of garbase, while the prohibi tionists are planning to make garbage out of alcohol. i A New York magistrate sternly re buked a woman who tried to bribe him with a box of cigars. Evidently he is a married man. It Is only fair to say that perusal of Mr. Bryan's Commoner fails to dis close any difference since his retire ment from the editorship. Mr. Taft may not talk as much as Mr. Bryan, but when he speaks he says something that appeals to the common wen so of reasonable men. l Congressman Sulzer wants to run for governor of New York on the dem ocratic ticket.. The scheme will not fool the prohibition vote. Scientists assert that a tiy nas an eye which can look in 1,000 different directions at the same time. That's why it is hard to fool a fly. A scientist has discovered how to make a valuable serum from a pig's ear. Perhaps, but he can't make a silk purse out of one of them. A Philadelphia man has been sent to jail for swindling several lawyers. He can get rich on the museum cir cuit as soon as he gets out of jail. That state pride story has received several punctures since Colonel Bryan set out to invade the states of other candidates where be has to go up against the state pride argument. The receivership for the Booth Packing company calls attention to the establishment of what is practically a trust cr monopoly of the flea trade which would not be affected at all by a removal of the tariff on the "trust- made product." Former Secretary Leslie M. Shaw possesses the kind of humor that ap peals to fun-loving Americans. He has just sent a message to Mrs. Taft to be delivered to Iyer by Mr. Taft "In case he should meet his wife during the progress of the campaign." WO FLACK I. IKK AMERICA. Since last October, when the period of Industrial depression began in the I'nlted States, more foreigners have returned to Kurope each month than have come to the L'nlted States, with the exception of the month of Auguct. but peculiar significance attaches to the passenger list of the l.usitania. which arrived in New York last week. The big steamer bad on board TOO Swedish i m in is ran is. 6.1(1 of whom hnd returned to Sweden last fall. The returning sous of Sweden left the United States last fall when times were bod in this country. They had listened to the representations of the Swedish government officials, pictur ing Improved conditions across the ocean aud telling of the desire of the Swedish people to have their native sons come home and help in the up building of the nation. This appeal to patriotism, coupled with the desire to see home once more, was a potent factor in causing the exodus of Swedes. Now they are returning to America with stories of disappointment. When the Swedieh-Araerican citizens returned to Sweden they found wages higher than they had been In that country for years, but they also found that the cost of living had grown, leav ing the margin of possible saving no larger than In the old days. Above all, they discovered that, owing to century-old prejudices jnd customs the working man could not live in Sweden in the "American way," the equal of his fellow citizens and the enjo.ver of freedom In thought and action. So the Swedish-Americans are coming back ready to make America their homes for the rest of their lives. L 1 WHAT IS THE REMCDTt Words used In discussing the speed mania are wasted. Just what it is that impels the owner of an automobile or a motorcycle, or any other form of time and distance annihilator, to want to go faster than anyone else, has so far eluded the search of many who have sought zealously for the answer. The real question is: What is to be done about It? As these machines in crease in number, and they are multi plying rapidly, the problem becomes more and more acute. One correspond ent of The Bee has suggested that the machine itself be levied upon and made to bear the cost of whatever damage may follow on the owner's or driver's carelessness. This plan has the merit of offering something tangible against which to levy a fine or assess puni tive damages. But it meets with the difficulty of establishing responsibility for the accident complained of. A far better remedy is to require a license as a condition precedent for the driving of a machine of any kind. A rigid examination as to qualifications should be made the basis of the li cense, and not only should the mechan ical and physical ability of the appli cant be taken into consideration, but his moral fitness as well. The enforce ment of some such law as this would do away with much of the scandal that now attends the driving of high-powered, speedy machines about the public streets. It would relieve drivers of known prudence and skill from the fodlum they now shar with the care less and reckless, and would give to pedestrians something more or confi dence in safety on the streets. THE CONISO or A COMET. If the astronomers have not mixed their dntcs or missed their calcula tions, we are going to have something besides politics to talk about next year. Mr. Halley's famous comet is headed this way, playing a return en gagement after an absence of seventy five years. This comet, according to the astronomers. Is no side-show af fair by any manner of means, but a real giant among comets, with a head as big as all outdoors and a tall that Is longer than art and the moral law combined. When It appears the peo pie will all sit up and Uhe notice. An English scientist, Halley, has the distinction of having been first to tag this comet and fix the proper labels. lie showed that the comet, which has been named in his honor, made Its Initial bow to the earth twelve years before the Christian era and has come back every seventy-five or seventy-six years since. It was here In the year 989, in 1060. 1145, 14 56, 1513. 1607, 1682 and about every seventy-five years since. The advance agents of the comet have tipped it off to the astronomers that Halley's big show is now enroute toward the pun from a point beyond the orbit of the planet Neptune aud is billed to emerge from the impenetrable night of space and dazzle the earth some time this win ter, unless the stellar landlords attach its baggage or some like mishap forces the attraction off the aerial road. History shows that Halley's show has always created something of a sensation. When it first appeared, 12 B. C, It was held responsible tor the overthrow of govei nun nts, the epi demic of plagues apt) the breaking up of homes that occurred about that time. Its next appearance was fol lowed by the locust plogue In Egypt, and it was held responsible, when it appeared in 1066, for the Norman in vasion of England. It shone again in the eyes of men in 1456, just when the Turks had become masters of Con stantinople and threatened to advance into Europe. It was in that year that Tope Calixus felt obliged to issue a special edict, adding to the ordinary litany the petition, "Deliver us from the Devil, the Turks and the Comet." This comet has always been asso ciated with predictions of war, pesti lence, famine or revolution, but, thanks to the astronomers, twentieth century people are more familiar with comets and their habits and have lost much of their fear of them. The as tronomers agree that if llalley's comet should bump Into the earth there would not be a greasy spot left of any of us, but they also agree that the chances against such an accident are about -S 1,000, 000 to 1, and the Amer ican people take greater chances than that every day In the year. 7 UK SICKLE FAMILY KKlWIO. The reconciliation of General Dan iel E. Sickles aud bis wife, after a sep aration of twenty-seven years, is one of the most notable social events of recent times and deserves special at tention, as Oeneral Sickles was the first American of prominence to appeal to the "unwritten law," which has been much in evidence in the last few years. General Sickles has been a promi nent figure In public life for more than sixty years and hla career has been bizarre and sensational. His friend ships have been warm and his enmities bitter and no man has attracted more public discussion, criticism and de fense. His part in the fighting of the second day at Gettysburg is still a moot subject wherever two or three survivors of thit conflict are gathered and almost every phase of his varied career has been a subjeect for discus sion and dispute. He has always held most positive views, never occupying neutral grounds on any proposition. It is nearly fifty years ago since Gen eral Sickles shot and killed rhillip Barton Key, th? alleged betrayer of the old general's first wife, who died soon after the tragedy. The trial which followed was celebrated in the annals of criminal jurisprudence, re sulting in a verdict of acquittal through an appeal to the "unwritten law," the jury holding that in such cases as his had been, a man must needs kill to defend and fortify the sacred ness of family. Some years after the killing of Key, General Sickles was made American minister to Madrid and there married the daughter of a Spanish councillor of state. When General Sickles de cided to return to America his wife elected to remain with her mother, who was very ill at the time. That was twenty-seven years ago and the general and his wife have lived apart since that time, although they have corresponded regularly and he has been liberal In his provisions for her support. Mrs. Sickles' mother died re cently and now the old general and his Spanish bride are to be reunited. In the meantime, the stormy career of General Sickles has continued. He has taken a personal hand In the politics of state and nation, enthusiastic for his friends and unrelentingly hostile to his opponents, until declining years have forced him to abate his activities. General Sickles will be 84 years old In a few weeks, and it is fitting that his career, which has been tempestu ously stormy In war, love and politics, should be rounded out in peace. COMtMTTI.Yt; TUBERCVLOSIS- Progress made by medical science In the struggle against "all the His that flesh Is heir to," and especially against the more dreaded forms of physical disorder, such as cancer aud tubercu losis, has not as yet come to that point where the doctors will agree that re sults are more than encouraging. The greatest public interest, probably, cen ters in the effort to eradicate, If possi ble, one form of tuberculosis most commonly known as "consumption." This has been dubbed "the great white plague," snd statistics gathered during recent years shows that it. well deserves the title. It slays annually move per sons than all other forms of disease, and no section of the country Is safe from its ravages. And the most hope less phase of the struggle Is (hat no specific has yet been disclosed whereby a sufferer may Insure himself from the ravages of the genu after It has gained a foothold in his system. Years of anxious research along this line have been rewarded by failure only, and tho doctor nowadays can only pre scribe what his predecessor did, plenty of fresh air, proper food and well regulated exercise. But the doctors are not without hope. They have discovered that a great , many, possibly the majority, of cases when taken in the earlier stages are benefited, if not permanently cured, by the regimen suggested by the "out door treatment." It has been learned that this may be undertaken as well in one section of the country as another and that the chief advantage of the arid regions once so eagerly sought Is that there may be found conditions more nearly ideal for the open-air life enjoined upon the sufferer. Thought has turned to another phase of the fight against the ditad disease, and that is to its prevention. Certain conditions of life tend to pre dispose the Individual to the attack of tuberculosis in some one of its many forms, and this predisposition has lessened his powers of resistance to the extent that he falls a ready victim. I: is to remedy these conditions of life und by surrounding possible victims of the disease with such environment that they may be able to resist infec tion that the chief effort is now being directed. While the search for the remedy has not been given over or re laxed, the "ounce of prevention" that "is worth more than a pound of cure" is coming in for greater attention. A national association with this object In view has been formed aud under It state associations. Nebraska, which is in a large measure immune from the disease, has its association, which will soon make an exhibition of the meth ods of prevention for the benefit of Omaha people who may be interested. The work Is being carried forward by the medical profession with the as sistance of the laymen and the results have been moBt encouraging and more than Justify the effort. j'HAWin the i.ise The Bee has received a number of complimentary letters and many more personal expressions of satisfaction tin its refusal to make Its columns a sewer for all the nauseating filih stirred up by it recent tragic scandal. While The Bee takes no special credit to itself for drawing the line as closely as possible In favor of decency, such evidences of appreciation are naturally pleasing. It is the aim and object of The Bee to publish a paper that can be safely admitted Into the home without filter ing noxious poison iuto the systems of pure-minded women and children. While occasionally it is difficult to draw the line between what is news which our readers ought to have and what should be expurgated for their good, we believe it Is better to err, if at all, on the side of cleanliness and wholesomeness. The people of Omaha and vicinity who waut scandal sheets will probably continue to look for the vile stuff In other papers, but those who want their news served to them promptly and reliably by a paper they will not be ashamed to take home will give their preference to The Bee. AO PEXSWy RECOMM E y DA T toys. For the first time since the civil war the annual encampment of the Grand Army has adjourned without making, requesting or suggesting additional pension legislation. The veterans went further and adopted a resolution granting congress "three years' respite from soldiers' legislation." The dol- lar-a-day pension bill, introduced in the last, congress by General Sherwood of Ohio, was withdrawn at the au thor's request, and the resolution ask ing that prisoners of war b" granted a pension of $2 a day was laid over, with the understanding that it. would not be offered again for three years. The decision of the veterans Is a tribute to the various republican ad ministrations that have, from time to time, made liberal provisions for the care of the nation's defenders. Al though slowly, practically all reason able demands have been met, with the result that the United States has paid more money for the relief of its war veterans and their families than any other nation on earth. The veterans themselves appreciate this fact and, as the resolution adopted recites, "further hammering for pensions would create a bad Impression, not only in the minds of congressmen, but in the minds of the people." The present annual pension roll is about $145,000,000 and the total amount paid by the government for the pension of the veterans of all Its wars has been In excess of $3,220,000, 000. Each year for many years the commissioner of pensions has reported that the high water mark in pension disbursements had been reached and that the pensioned were dying faster than the new applications, but each year these calculations have been de feated by the creation of new classes or increases in existing rates of pen sions. The three years' respite from pension legislation will have the effect of causing a reduction in the ; ti 11 ual pension appropriation tiulil the in creased neerls of the veterans, n need nn' iral and certain with their advance in a., demand more liberal provision for the survivors. tra K.ff i v ia 1 1. m iy pa r. The . Canadians have decided on an innovation in the matter of holidays by determining to celebrate their Thanksgiving day on Monday here after, instead of on Thursday, ns has been customary for many years. The argument back of this decision is that Monday makes a better holiday than Thursday because It follows a day of rest and. counting it with Saturday and Sunday, makes a three days' vacation for school children, thus giving more opportunity for family reunions and holiday excursions. It Is urged, loo, that it will Interfere less with th com mercial affairs lhan if observed on Thursday, just as Labor day causes less dislocation of industrial affairs than would be the case were it ob served In the mid-week instead of on Monday, ' Thanksgiving day is a movabl" feast and nothing but custom has rKcd its observance on Thursday und in Novem ber. President Washington fixed Thursday, November 2 6, as Thanks giving day in his first presidential ptoclamatlon, but changed it the next yea i to February 19. The day was not regularly observed throughout the country until the custom was revived by President Lincoln In 1&63 and suc ceeding presidents have followed his example by setting the third or last Thursday In November for the celebra tion of the day. Several members of boih houses of the last Nebraska legislature have been renominated notwithstanding the unwritten rule for rotation that under the convention system would have ac corded the place to some other county in the district. Of course, geograph ical location is not always a pvime fac tor in a political campaign, but it re mains to be seen whether in this re spect the direct primary carries with it an incurable weakness. The German emperor is making it plain that he has no objection to France doing all the fighting necetsary to keep the unruly faction in Morocco subdued. Speaking of tho negro vote, Colonel Watterson declares that "the demo cratic party asks uothiug, promises nothing." Oh, yes it docs. It asks the negro in the north to vote the democratic ticket snd requests the negro In the south to submit without complaint to disfranchisement. Colonel Bryan insists that $ I SO. 000 would be a libe ral estimate to put upon all his accumulated wealth. If Mr. Urynn would put his Commoner into a stock company and sell a few shares at Ruction he would have to rahe his figures several times. Judge Wallace of Kausas City de clares that In that city they have "vile elections, crooked elections, wicked elections, thieving elections and mtinstious elections." Otherwise, it Is understood, the Kansas City elec tions are all right. John W. Gates is to invite a few friends in to watch him cut a 107 pound watermelon. Gates got in the habit of cutting melons when he was in the Wall street end of the railroad game. The democratic factions in Pennsyl vania have agreed not to nominate separate candidates for presidential electors. Evidently they are afraid that they may lose the slate. Governor Haskell Is taking a mean advantage of an oversight in the Okla homa constitution by flooding the country with campaign sougs of his own composition. Mr. Bryan msy ignore Mr. Hearst, but it Is difficult to see how be can ignore the affidavits presented by Mr. Hearst showing Bryan's attitude to ward labor. The It lull t Spirit. Brooklyn Times. TIip good spirit that hni distinguished I he principals lias naturally give n the tone of dVrale to their follower!", and mi far the fight has been a fight of genlleiiu-n, personalities have been avoided and noth ing has hern done to stir up unfriendly or unnelghburly feeling. That Is as it should be. An I nfortnnnle Combination. Washington Post. It is unfortunate that there should lie an election for slate, county or municipal of fices in any state the day, of even the year, of a president la I election or congressional election. These offices have to do with the. nation, and the public- mind should con template the issues presented untrammelcd by the bickerings, tin: jealousies and the factions of local politics. Coining Hike of Army- OftU-rrs. Hprlngfic'.d Kepubllean. The walking test for army officers which is to he held in October is not unduly severe. An athlete would think small potatoes of coveting fifty miles In twenty hours within three days. It means less than seventeen miles a day, at a rate of but two and one-half miles an hour, and the par ticipants go light, without swords, pistols, fleldglasses or note books. It will lie a bore, to be sure, but all who ate not cripples should be able to manage it. taooil Fortune of the Farmers. Philadelphia Record. The condition of corn at the beginning of the month, of spring wheat and barley at the time of harvest, and of oats, was not quite up to I he nverage at this (late for the past ten years, but as the loss of condition is not marked, and the acreage Is large, ample, even If not bumper, crops are assured. Agricultural records may not be broken, but the farmers of America are now closing up ihe twelfth successive harvest season which has been almost uni formly gooii and in most eases fine, t hie short crop of corn and one of cotton have occurred in that periort, hoi the prices mailo those short crops1 unui-iiHlly remuner ative to the producers. It Is doubtful If the farmers have ever had such a period as the last dozen years, the beginning of which was the end of the depri ssion of IVfl -7. Incident f Western I'spanslnn. Philadelphia l.rdeer. Th ileot ruction by fire of the town of Biwhidn, in Nevada, Is a not unusual in cident of western expansion. Towns of this class are generally of one type. At flr.t they cotMM of low frame houses, shops and saloons," liaslily and cheaply blilt. As these accumulate, with the. In crease of population, and the business of lh- place develops, t here , grad ua My arise more substantial building -stores, banks, offices, hotels but not enough to. change the flimsy character of Ihe town. Then the fire comes aud sweeps it all away. Afier that a new town is built with rea sonable regard to permanence. It Is nit the dct ruet ion of mining tow ns that In dicates our American recklessness of lire hisses. t s the frequency of sweeping conflagrations in older und larger cities where flimsy budding Is without the same excuse. itim of childhood. Proposal to Km lend Actltltles of Ihe Federal o ernmen I. Cleveland Plain Ucalct. Tie- western woman who complained that, while the national government was ready to advise her husband concerning the proper care of his hogs, it was not prepared to help her In the care and tiaiuinK of her children, was not giving way to neons, sarily vain regrets, for the guidance he sought will he furnished if the proposal of the national child labor commlltee, with headquarters in New York. Is enacted into law. A hill to establish a national chil dren's bureau was Introduced in Ihe Cniled Slates senate In the. winter of lSnu-'.ri. It did not come to a vole, though It received the endorsement of President Roosevelt and of Secretary Hitchcock of the Department of the Interior, under which the proposed bureau would probably be placed. The project, then allowed to languish, .s to be reintroduced al the coming session, and students of child life and Us problems are hopeful thai tl.e pecc -saury legislation may then be passed. The tendency of modern progressive gov ernment Is toward more hiiunjie service in behalf of the people. It may be calhd paternalism, hut If propel ly exercised it is at once so serviceable aud so inoffensive that tiie public welcomes It. The problems thai deal with chlldlioud are of tiie utmost importance tu society since our citizenship of loluoriow is lecruileii fium the lunks of tne boy and girls of today. No nation lhat is careless of- lis children can bupe long to survive. The proposed new bureau would be under the direction of an expert wilh the pre-Mlye and resources of the gov ernment behind him fur the promotion of health, vigor and general efficiency of the children of the nation. It would in a meas ure supplement Hie census bureau aud ex tend the Biannual t-.Uuia of that dicen nial agem y. More will be heard of this project and much legitimate, pressure will b brought on congress to mad it Into law. THE BRANDEIS BANK IN THE BRANDEIS BUILDING SOLICITS YOUR ACCOUNT Thousaixls of depositors hnve profited by the 4 per cent allowed on their savings; their money beiny; at all times subject to withdrawal without notice. Special attention now given to commercial business 1 i b e r a 1 and courteous treatment assured J. L. Brandeis Si Sons and the offi cers and directors of the bank in dividually guarantee to depositors every dollar deposited. CONVENIENT BANKING HOURS 9 A. M. to 5 P. M. Saturdays P. M. SKRMO BOILED DOWN. Ton can give nothing to men until you give them yourself. Charity requires no other letter of Intro duction than a real need. Always II is better to get a man to think ing then to give him thoughts. Tiie secret of consecrallon Is simply con centration on some high service. An analysis of the water of life will do little to relieve this thirsty world. Many a word In our language Is emply until sorrow gives it a new content. Debating doctrine Is an old dodge of the devil to avoid the doing of some duty. You (annul make a txet of scripture bore any deeper by twisting II like a corkscrew. Whatever strengthens class feeling lengthens the day of waiting for the king dom. He who limils his knowledge hy hit understanding dies of experimental ignor ance. The more a man vociferates against vice the less likely he Is to put virtue Into act ion. Some men seem to think God's clocks would all stop if they should forget to wind them up. When a man gets to bragging of his smart tricks he ha.s one foot already in the devil's traps. Some folks never gel any dreams of heaven except when they go to hear a sleepy preacher. Chicago Tribune. ri;nM i. ami othriiwikr, If Ihe weather clerk was onto the possi hilitles of his job lie would mount the water wagon and jar loose. The Rockefeller gcncoloRlcal tree, rooted in defunct royalty, casts an unwelcome shade over Ida Tarbell's researches. The latest fall fashion permits a mild suggestion of hips, lct womankind rejoice and be duly thankful for small favors. The approaching season of sheath trou sers for men of fashion will lend charming emphasis to the familiar salutation, "Hello, Old Socks." An Ohio youngster of 16 who fled from home to hustlo for himself was offered four jobs In ono day in Chicago. This is a great year for Buckeyes. , The versatility of l'nlted States courts is equal to every emergency. Just now fed eral courts are managing beauty parlors in New York and an oyster stew In Chicago. Palling around on a flying machine for an hour Isn't much to brag about. The m.vsterles of a sensalion ran keep an entire community "in the air" for more than a week. A largo rhniik of forehanded wisdom is tied up In th" proposition sprung In a con vention of veterinarians in Philadelphia; "Hhall w take up automoblllng as one of the branches of our profession?" The statistician of Chicago's Three-Mil lion club insists there are L'.tO.imn. persons residing within the limits of the rity. The temperature of the claimant's output is at least thirty degrees above that of the es teemed lake breeie. Don't Miss the KMKRSOX, used upright Piano SIDft CltAMKK, new upright Flano $180 IVKRS .M) I'DNH, used upright Piano $211 Ml'KLLKR, used square TMano J5'ir SCHr.MAX, usmI upright Piano 8178 WHITXKV. ubc(1 upright Piano $lGf liXABK, used square Piano $35 BIKDKTTK. new uprlcht Piano 8315 Iieinember we have many more underprired pianos from which you may choose. Should you decide later that you want a Kranich k Jiach, Krakaner, Kimball or Bush & Lane or any of our magnifi cent line, we will allow you a good valuation in exchange. Come and See Is Before You A. HOSPE CO., We Do Expert Piano H. The Only Money T M 5 iff DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES. 1 never saw such a devoted farrier. w ' What's his latest'.'" "Why. he has an expert phonograph r nl the lions- and keeps h:m liusv ranning the babv-'s bright remarks."-Oeveland I lain Dealer. "This gas bill Is onlv for 10 tents. " "Well, sir?" "Couldn't vou add Jl" We been writing my wife that I'm spending ?iv evenings fit home." lxiuisvllle 'nurier-Juurna I. "My husband Is a most fotgelful man " "So." "Vrs. indeed; why I believe he actually forgets he's married hslf the time.' "He's always .lolly; rVe noticed that nr. -self.' Houston f'osi. "You say you are marrying voung Vnn Itox to reform him? That's noble of you, but I didn't know he had any vices"' "Oh. yes. People sav he's getting stinjtv with his money." Cleveland leader. "When we are married." said th grl, "of course you will shave everv piornlrV that's one of the rules of our rhih. Ws ail agreed not to marry miv man who wouldn't shave every morning." "Well, what about the mornings 1 don t get home in time?" responded the voting man. "I belong to a club, too. ' I'hiU tlelphia ledger. "Whal kind of s woman is she?' "One without diplomacy." "Without diplomacy?" "Yfs. Khe will argue, with an Iceman about the size of the lump until It all melts away and there Is onlv a wet snot on the sunny sidewalk." Chicago Vows "Kdilh. I was ashamed of rou when nij called Mr. Mldlage an old n an to his facr- " "Why, mamma. I did nothing of the kind. I wouldn't h as Impolite as that for the world. I called him an old gentleman." - ( hlcago Tribune. Tess Well, there's one thing rbnut Mav Yvnodhy. She has the courage of her con victions. .toss-Indeed? I never noticed It. Osa O, yes. She', convinced thst shs cn wear a No. 3 shoe. -Philadelphia ITus. v TO A IlKGINNUa. r.r , Washington Star. So you're anxious, young man, to go uo In the world; You're looking for friendly advice; You think that to see your own portrait unfurled When banners float forth would b nice' There's a serious question wlUcli you must decide When your bid to the puh'llc you make, 'Ere the limelight presents you to view, far an.1 wide. What kind of a pose will you take? Will you seek to Impress by your solemn repose or to charm by your manner so free? Will you strive for long speeches that make people doze Or dazzle with swift repartee ? Will you sound the bazoo that Is slumbrous and slow. "r the trump that keeps people airake You can't make a start till you let ins world know What kind of n pose you will take. Take warning, before your position you choose In the scene, full of hazard and strife. You must wear the same whiskers and waistcoats and shoes The rest of your natural life' I.et nothing your amile or jour frown dis arrange When placing your future at stake; It Is really strange how the public hslfs ehanae What kind of a pose will you take? Joy of a Piano in Your Home You ran afford ono. Our trrms and onr lo'w priors rnablr you to enjoy ihe pleasures of music rild now. $10 spnds one home. $5 a month pays for a pood piano. These and many other bargains are your opportunity. At least come and see the pianos. Bay Any Piano at Any Price 1513 Douglas Slreel Tuning and Repairing. Ths average man eavc-H is what lie puts Into life iniirnnce. This Kind of savins not only makes ample provision for his old age, foul provides Im ni.diale protection to family and business inter ests if he should die. The Kquitable Life of New York writes policies to meet every requirement. D. NEELY, Mgr. OMAHA, NE5.