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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 1, 1908)
TTTF, OMAHA DAILY BEE: SATURDAY, AUGUST 1, 1903.
Tim Omaha Daily Dei.
FOUNDED 6T EDWARD ROSEWATER.
- ri i . . . .
VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR.
Enteral lit Omaha postofflcs aa second
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cepted. STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION!
State of Nebraska, Douglas County, ,!.
George B. Tischuck. treasurer ot Tna
Bee Publishing company, being duly
sworn, says that tha actual number or
full and complete copies of Tha Dal'T,
Morning, Evening and Sunday Bea printed
during the month of June, !. was as
B0. a 38,890
k . . ao.asu
. .30, ft 00
Less unsold and returned copies.. 9,6T7
Nat total 1,079,313
Dallejr average 35,977
SOROS B. TZSCHUCK.
Subscribed I In my presence andworn'to
sfora ma this 1st day of Julv, 19ci
M. P. WALKER,
WHEW OUT or TOWK,
Pabeeribers imrimK th city tans,
porarlly aha siava Tha Baa
mailed to them. Ad dree. nl b
rbana-ed M often aa requested.
Castro may have a chance to beat
Richard Croker Bays that he has
given up io'UIcs for pood. Of poli
tics? The crusade I6r the suppreBslon of
unnecessary noises has not yet reached
Speaking of unnecessary noises, Mrs.
George W. Noyes of New York is seek
ing a divorce from hers.
The American voter usually knows
what to do when given his choice be
tween experience and theory.
Governor Hughes says he Is
worrying over his renomlnatlon.
New York democrats are.
Apparently Mr. Bryan thinks the
admonition, "Thou shalt not steal" is
directed at the other fellow.
The Jacksonlans might achieve their
fell purpose easier by keeping Mayor
Jim on the debating platform.
The straight and narrow path Is a
good deal safer to travel tor state offi
cers as well as for ordinary citlsens
A Bociety paper reports that "the
Billy Beason is on at Newport." The
silly season is always on at Newport.
. Washington health authorities are
protesting against the cracked mug.
mturany no man wants bis mug
If the sultan really wants to lm
prove the Turkish constitution, he
ought to place the ban on Turkish
The new editor of the Commoner, It
Is suspected, will not be able to find
room In the paper for Mr. Hearst's
Chicago convention speech.
"Who," asks a correspondent, is the
author of th statement, "Figures
don't He!" Don't know, but it could
not have been a dressmaker.
New York reports a scarcity of
chorus girls. Probably a natural ef
fect of the shortage In this season's
crop of Pittsburg millionaires.
The author of "Bill Bailey" Is said
to be bankrupt. He might take up a
fat collection by promising not to
write anything like that again.
It looks as it Mr. Bryan Is opposed
to larceny "through the operation of
law," except only when the law can be
twisted to operate in his favor.
If It were not for going back on the
Denver platform, Mr. Bryan would
doubtless liks to get out Injunctions
against Hearst and Tom Watson.
A magaxina writer says canal water
would help American railway stocks.
Perhaps, but the American railway
managers appear to prefer Wall street
A Chicago man and his wife are In
the divorce court because she refused
to curl his moustache for him. Still,
he would have kicked even harder if
Bhe bad tried to curl bis hair.
"Why I Would Not Marry My Hus
band. Again" Is tho title or an article
In tho current number of the Ladies'
Home Journal. Why should It be
necessary to marry him mora than
UR. RRTAX JJVD THE RA II ROAM
Mr. Bryan's declaration that he will
not discuss any political proposition
not contained In the Denver platform
may relieve him of some embarrassing
questions, but it still leaves govern
ment ownership of railways open for
his consideration, discussion and ex
planation. The Denver platform. It is
true, does not refer specifically to gov
ernment ownership of railways, but It
demands railway regulation, and on
that point comes into direct conflict
with Mr. Bryan's expressed convic
tions. Mr. Bryan does not believe
anything can be accomplished by ef
forts to regulate railroads, so long as
they are privately owned.
Tho platform demands "efficient su
pervision and rate regulation of rail
roads engaged In interstate com
merce," with an enlargement of the
powers of the Interstate Commerce
commission "to compel the railroads
to perform their duties as common car
riers and to prevent discrimination
and extortion." That Is good republi
can doctrine and Is In practical accord
with the recommendations of Presi
dent Roosevelt and the legislation In
that direction by a republican con
gress. It, however, collides with Mr.
Bryan's emphatic declaration to the ef
fect that it is hopeless to expect any
good from efforts to regulate the rail
roads and that government ownership
la the only real remedy for railroad
When Mr. Bryan spoke at Madison
Square garden, In New York, on Au
gust 30, 1906, upon his return from
his European trip, he scared the dem
ocrats of the country almost to death
I have reached the conclusion that there
will be no permanent relief on tho rail
road question from discrimination be
tween individuals and between places and
from extortionate rates until the rail
roads are the property of the government
and operated by the government In the
Interest of the people.
This radical expression was modified
slightly by Mr. Bryan a little later,
as protests poured in upon him from
democrats all over the country, but as
late as a little more than a year ago
Mr. Bryan reiterated his belief in gov
ernment ownership of railroads as the
only relief from discriminations, re
bates and extortions and corruption in
politics. In a letter to the Wall Street
Journal, printed April 10, 1907, Mr.
For some fourteen years after my en
trance Into national politics I hoped for
effective railroad legislation, and was
brought reluctantly to the conclusion that
government ownership furnished the only
satisfactory remedy for the discrimina
tions, rebates and extortions practiced by
the railroads and for the corruption which
they have brought Into politics.
According to this, Mr. Bryan tried
for fourteen years to resist the In
sidious workings of the government
ownership microbe, but was finally
reluctantly" compelled to succumb to
It. He exhibited the first symptoms
when, in the Commoner, In July. 1904,
he appealed to the democrats of the
country "to consider a plan for the
government ownership and operation
of railroads." In a speech before the
Jefferson club in Chicago, In 1905, he
elaborated his plan by proposing that
the government own the trunk lines
while the states operate the roads
within their borders. This, it may be
mentioned, answered a part of the
southern objection, where federal
ownership would mean the elimination
of the "Jim Crow" cars. He turned
completely to the doctrine in his Madi
son Square garden speech in 190G and
repeated his affirmation of allegiance
to It in the letter to the Wall Street
Journal In April, 1907. He further
declared, In the letter of April 10,
1907, that he had "reached the con
clusion that, In the end, regulation will
be found ineffective."
By his Denver platform Mr. Bryan
places himself In the attitude of urg
ing a system of railway regulation
which he has repeatedly declared
would be ineffective. After fourteen
years of study, hoping to find some
remedy In regulation, Mr. Bryan con
vinced himself tht the only remedy
lies In government ownership and that
all regulation would fall to furnish
the relief demanded. He has not ad
mitted having changed his opinion,
formed after so many years of study
and thought. It leaves him In the at
titude of muzzling his convictions in
the Interests of party expediency, of
urging a policy which he firmly be
lieves Is foredoomed to failure. It is
another proof that his motto 1b "Any
thing to win."
KXrORClSQ PC RE F'OD t.lH'S,
One of the most important steps
looking to the co-operative enforce
ment of the federal and state pure
food laws will be taken at a confer
ence to be held at Mackinac, on Lake
Michigan, beginning on August 1. Dr.
Wiley, head of the bureau of chemis
try of the Department of Agriculture,
has Invited the representatives of the
state dairy and food departments to
meet with the government officials for
the purpose of discussing and adopt
ing plans for a combined effort to sup
press misbrandings and adulterations.
The plan contemplates the appoint
ment of the local officers who are al
ready employed by the states or the
municipalities as federal auxiliaries
and thus interest them in the work of
the federal government.
Tho importance of effective co
operation between federal and state
authorities in this matter Is apparent.
The different states have gone ahead
developing their systems of food con
trol without much reference to each
other, with the result that, with dif
ferent rulings and different standards,
tha effective work has been much be
low what It should have been. While
there has been some conflict between
tho state and federal plans, the great
est loss in effectiveness bag come
through duplication of effort and con
sequently Increase In cost of food In
spection. Tho need Is for co-operation,
which, it is believed, can be best
recti red by having the local and state
officers also represent the federal gov
ernment as far as practicable.
imw Tiir.r love tob kegru.
The democrats of WeBt Virginia
have contributed to Mr. Bryan's em
barrassment by forcing negro disfran
chisement to the front Just when Mr.
Bryan is trying to put It on the shelf
with free silver, government owner
ship of railways and llko missteps
which he has committed at various
times. Mr. Bryan refuses to discuss
the negro question because, as he says,
It is not mentioned In the Denver plat
form. The record indicates that he Is
refusing to discuss it because, in an
effort to placate the south, he has
given a direct slap at the few north
ern democrats who are making a bid
for negro support.
The West Virginia democrats de
clare that the negro question is a na
tional issue and that the democratic
party is in favor of denying the ballot
to negroes. In the stale convention
of the democrats of West Virginia a
negro disfranchisement and a "Jim
Crow" car plank were adopted, "amid
scenes of the wildest excitement." The
negro disfranchisement plank is as
Believing that the extension of the
elective franchise to a race Inferior in
Intelligence and without preparation for
the wise and prudent exercise of a privi
lege so Vital to the maintenance of good
government was a mistake. If not a
crime, committed by the repuhllenn party
during the reign of passion and prejudice
following the civil wnr for political ends
and purposes, we declare that the demo
cratic party Is In favor of so amending
the constitution as to preserve the purity
of the ballot and the electorate of the
state from the evil resulting from con
ferring such power and privilege upon
those who are unfitted to appreciate its
Importance as It affects the stability and
preservation of good government.
According to the record, Mr. Bryan
is In sympathy with the action of the
West Virginia democrats. In his
speech at Cooper Union, New York,
last April, he was asked by a man in
the audience to define his position on
the question of negro disfranchisement
in the south. He replied:
The white man of tho .south puts a
qualification on negro suffrage In self
defense. There Is not a community In the
north that would not put on a similar
qualification under the same circum
stances. The white men In neither the
north nor the south will permit a few
men to take the solid black vote and use
It for the making of money regardless of
the interests of the community, as was
done by the carpet baggers in the south.
But his West Virginia democrats
can not even advance the fear of negro
domination, usually pleaded in some
of the southern states, in Justification
of disfranchisement. The population
of West Virginia In 1900 was 915,233
whiteB and 43,499 negroes. The
whites outnumber the negroes by 21
to 1 and negro domination Is about
as imminent in West Virginia as It Is
in Nebraska. The West Virginians
simply assert it as a democratic doc
trine that the negro should not be
allowed to vote. This 1b the general
sentiment of tho democratic party and
it is shared in by the party's candi
date for the presidency.
ASCERDEXCr OF THE AUTOMOBILE.
Some inquisitive person digging into
the records at the state house has dis
covered a notable discrepancy between
the assessors' returns ot automobiles
taxable In Nebraska and the registry
of automobiles kept by the secretary
of state. The comparison discloses
that 3,402 horseless vehicles have been
licensed to travel the highways and
byways of Nebraska, while the tax offi
cers succeeded in returning only 1.6J9
Of course, this discrepancy may be
partly accounted for by the fact that
some of the machines registered may
have gone out of the state or have
been put out of commission, and the
further fact that the assessors are sup
posed to have started their rounds on
April 1, while the accumulation of au
tomobiles by Nebraskans on Easy
street has been going on right along
since that date without interruption.
The significant part of the exhibit,
however, is not the discrepancy, but
the disclosure that nearly 3,500 auto
mobiles are at large In this prairie
state, whose population Is made up ex
clusively of farmers and people de
pendent upon the farms. The remark
able thing is the widespread distribu
tion of the automobile habit. There
are automobiles in tho cities and auto
mobiles on the farms and automobiles
in the sand hills. One far western
Nebraska county, which used to be
known exclusively for drouth, calam
ity and populists, is paying taxes on
thirty-one automobiles, not to mention
the number that got away from the as
sessor. Another Nebraska county,
popularly supposed to consist of noth
ing but alkali and buttes, has eight
automobiles listed for the tax gatherer.
How could the automobile gain such
an ascendency In Nebraska unless con
ditions here were most favorable for a
And now the Chicago & Northwest
ern railroad Is objecting to paying
taxes levied against its freight depot
property in Omaha for last year and
tho year before, setting up a technical
defense. And this Is the "only good
railroad in Nebraska," that boasted
about its refusal to Join the bad rail
roads endeavoring to escape taxes by
An old African traveler declares that
the African Hon Is a coward and the
elephant timid, and that the only
really ferocious animals In the Dark
Continent are bugs, beetles and mi
crobes. President Roosevelt may not
tak that hunting trip if he learns that
he should go armed with Insert pow
der Instead of magazine rifles.
Colonel Bryan got out from under
Brother-ln-Law Tom Allen's 115,000
boodle venture by setting up the de
fense of innocent Ignorance. He can
not plead Ignorance to Brother-ln-Law
Tom's present scheme to rob Tom Wat
son of the votes that are to be cast for
him by Nebraska populists.
According to our amiable democratic
contemporary, the World-Herald, the
great safe-blowing enterprise by which
the Bryanites expect to steal the votes
cast for Tom Watson In Nebraska in
November will not be a crime because
the dynamite and the drills were
bought before Watson was nominated.
The Brooklyn Eagle doubts the
equipment of Norman E. Mack for the
management of the democratic cam
paign. Neither the Eagle nor Mr.
Mack need worry about that. The real
manager of the campaign Uvea in Lin
coln. "Who Is the author of the 'Master
of Mysteries?' " asks a reader. Don't
know his name, but he is the man
who is figuring out how Bryan can be
elected without carrying New York,
Indiana and a bunch of western states
that are solidly republican.
"Was Adlai Stevenson ever in pub
lic life?" asks a subscriber. Yes. He
served a term as fourth assistant post
mefter general and was later demoted
to the position of vice president of the
The announcement that Dr. Wilbur
F. Crafts is about to speak in Omaha
should prepare our good people for
another loud notification that Omaha
Is the wickedest city on earth and
must be redeemed.
Tammany Boss Murphy has been
called into requisition to declare that
"as surely as cotton is king, Bryan
will be elected president." We recall
several similar predictions made by
previous Tammany bosses.
It does not make so much difference
whether tho amusement features for
Ak-Sar-Ben's street fair are Imported
from Coney Island or from Kalamazoo
as it does whether they afford clean
and wholesome entertainment.
The temptation offered by the direct
primary for a cheap test of a man's
unpopularity seems to be quite irre
sistible to a lot of people who would
not risk their money on a more expen
Nearly one-third of the teachers in
the Omaha public schools receive the
pay given to the highest grade of serv
ice and efficiency. Omaha ought to
have public schools comparing well
with the best schools in the country.
It la the Oners City's Style.
' St. Louis Times.
Mr. Taft a not one of the prophets with
out honor In his own town. Cincinnati
showed him H smile bigger than his own.
A Rohnst "nspirton.
Washington Post. .
Dr. Wiley thinks a good many divorces
can be charged to poor bread, but In numer.
ous cases there Is a suspicion that the dis
agreement was brought about by a lack of
Tins for the Regulars.
Jmlgo Grosscup's dictum that you can't
fine a company more than Its capital stock
holds a suggestion for the Monday morning
bullpenner. I't him have himself Incor
porated for 10 cents.
Insurance Agjalnst Loss.
New York Tribune.
Mr. Bryan's campaign funds are to e
stored In Oklahoma, the state which In
sures bank deposits. In return for this
kindness the Oklahoma legislature will
dubtless convene in special session and
enact a law Insuring presidential nominees
Views of "Fair Ploy."
The George Gould view Is that the de
cision favoring the Standard Oil company
"again affirmed the American motto of
fair play." It certainly tends to affirm
the traditional Gould view of fair play
which Is that the corporation wins when
It's head and the public loses when it's
AMERICANS KEAK NOTHING.
Take C hances on Land and Sea with
New York Press.
The American people are afraid of noth
ing under the sun. Notwithstanding the
horrors upon horrors on land and sea, in
volving Injuries to hundreds of thousands
annually and death to tens of thousands,
there seems really to be no scare in us.
Excepting a mere handful of nerve-wrecked
Ir.valtds, who takes thought ot what may
happen when or. pleasure bent. Who stays
away from the theaters because a few oc
casionally burn down, with great loss of
life? Who demands a seat near an exit?
Who quits riding on railroads because they
kill 10,000 passengers a year and Injure
80,000? Who looks fur a safe seat? Who la
afraid to travel seventy-five miles an hour.
Who chooses his stateroom on a trans-
Atlantic liner with a view to safety? Who
asks the agent In what part of the vessel
lurks the least danger? Who remains
awake all night to look out for, collisions
and Icebergs? Who cares if the billows
are mountains high? Who hesitates to en
joy the festivities of the saloon, the smok
Ing room, or the concert room because of
the leviathan's pitching and rolling? Who
counts the number of lifeboats or examines
the location of the safety devices? Who
take the trouble to Inquire If there Is a
flre-flghting apparatus on board? Who
gives a rap about the fire drill? Who
thinks about anything but a lot of fun and
a quick voyage?
Who, of all the million that register
In hotels asks about the fire escapes? Who
feels the slightest uneasiness about the
safety of the elevators? Who would refuse
an office at the top of a 1,000 foot tower?
Who considers the possible horrors of a
flood In a Hudson river tunnel? Who hesi
tates to cross the Brooklyn bridge, even
though experts report Its cables far too
wak to sustain the burdens imposed upon
them? Who's afraid of who, any way
Who's afraid of what? The worst panic.
Is forgotten In a faw days. I do not refer
to money panics, which are never forgotten
by those on the losing side.)
OTHER LAND TlltX Ol R.
Lord Cramer, foimer British governor of
Kgypt. out-Hobson'e llobson as a war
propht. In a recent address In the House
of Lords against the old age pension bill,
he assailed the measure viciously, declar
ing the expenditure of money for the relief
of England's aged poor was a perversion
of the duty of the government. In his
view of the things, the government's duty
was to fill up Its war chests with coin and
be prepared for an approaching war In
which the life of the nation may be In
valued. "Our duty," he said, "la to make
provision betimes for a European conflict
which msy not Improbably be forced on us
before many years have elapsed." Ixrd
Cromer's fears have a substantial founda
tion, differing In this respect from the
shadows which disturb the gray matter of
tha Alabama congressman. King Edward's
diplomatic moves have lined up Prance,
Spain, Portugul and Italy on the side of
Qrest Britsln. The recent conference with
the ctar of Russia at Reval, doubtless re
sulted In a satisfactory understsndlng. How
well these entenes would stand the strain
of war with other powers Is a problem for
the event to solve. The fact remains that
Germany appears to be the only power of
Turope that has not come within the radius
of King Edward's diplomacy. The activity
of Germany In building up Its military and
naval establishments, Its entendlng Influ
ence through Austria Into the Ottoman em
pire, and the world-wide expansion of Its
capital and trade, makes It by large odds
the most Imposing rival of Great Britain,
commercially and otherwise, In Europe. If
Lord Cromer did not have the German
menace In mind when he assailed the pen
sion scheme, he must regard the discon
tent In India as a forerunner of war for the
maintenance of BrltlBh supremacy In tho
General Wllhelm von Illume, on the au
thority of the general staff of the German
army, has Issued a bulletin In which he dis
cusses the cost of a modern European war,
presenting an estimated bill of such as
tounding sire that the llobsons of the em
pire are Inclined to sober up and keep
allent. Germany, according to General von
Blunie, would be able to put 4.750.000 troops
in tho field; and to maintain this army In
a contest with any European power, would
require $1,500,000,000 a year. This reckoning
does not Includo the results of financial de
pression and the paralysis of Industry.
General von Blume believes that the loss
of life would be heavier than In the war
between Russia and Japan, In which SO per
cent of the Japanese armies In the field
were killed or wounded. If this propor
tion were to hold, Germany would loose,
say, at least 900,000 in killed and wounded in
the same length of time. These are stag
gering figures, but the course of recent
wars makes them highly probable.
The departure of the president of the
French republic on a round of visits to the
Russian emperor and other sovereigns In
the north of Europe is regarded with sat
isfaction In France as making at once for
peace and for the peaceful enhancement
of French prestige. Such views of It are
Judicious and amply justifiable. But It Is
fitting, for the sake of historical complete
ness, to emphasize the fact that It is the
president of the French republic who is
making his Journey, and whose making of
It Is esteemed of so much Importance.
Time was, In years still well remembered
by men not old, when a republican presi
dent was not generally persona grata at
the courts of Enrope, and when France
was looked at askant because of her In
sistence upon democratic Institutions.
Now, M. Fallleres Is the recognised peer
of king and kaiser, and his goings and
comings are regarded as of as much sig
nificance aa those of any monarch.
The Judgment of the Australian high'
court In the so-called Harvester case has
dealt a severe blow at what Is called the
new protection In Australia, though as the
decision was only obtained by a bare ma
jority of one judge In a tribunal of five, it
may not be altogether final. The essence of
the Harvester excise act was to confer on
labor an equivalent protection to that of
fered to manufacturers by the tariff, by
refusing the rebate to goods not produced
under the standard trade union scale. The
chief Justice and two other Judges of the
high court have declared this legislation
Invalid. Two of the judges dissent, main
taining that no discrimination Is implied,
and that the taxing powers of the federal
Parliament can be exercised even if the
Indirect effect should be to establish a
wage standard. The Judgment has aroused
much controversy. The lawyers and the
capitalists generally support the majority,
holding that the decision Is a vindication
both of the constitution and the validity of
the contracts. The labor men and many
of the politicians agree with the dissentient
Writing to a Frankfort paper, August
Emerlch says: "Hero In tho Holy Ixnd
one can see the old and the new fraternise
as nowhere else on earth. For the accom
modation of the Mahometan pilgrims . a
railroad Is being built from Mecca to
Medina. Can anything be more unreal
than a Mahometan pilgrimage to tho
sacred sepulcher by rail? That Is not all.
The mosque which Incloses tho tomb of
the prophet Is to be lighted by electric
lamps, and when you visit Medina next
year and remove your shoes before you
enter the holy place you will seo the
prophet's coffin Illuminated. The dim
religious light will have vanished before
the electric glow."
John Nicholson was an Irishman bear
ing a Scotch name who became a saint
In India In the days preceding the mutiny.
He led the assault at Delhi, in which he
was mortally wounded. As administrator
of the Punjah he so Impressed the natives
that they regarded him as a demigod, and a
brotherhood of fakirs adopted lilm as their
saint under the name of "Nlkhul Seyn."
On meeting Nicholson the members of the
sect would fall at his feet and worship
him, although he tried by Imprisonment
and whipping to stop the practice. The
lust of the original disciples of N'ikul Seyn
died soon after the mutiny, but the sect
ltill survives in the Punjab.
An American teacher, on a vacation trip,
writes from Swltierland: "It may be
known to many people, but I and those
who ftudled with me nevpr knew that the
smallest republic In the world U In Switzer
land. San Marino always held that plucj
where I was instructed a. id where I taught.
Now. as far as I am concerned. It wIM
be Salanse, In the Canton Wallle. It lies
on the e-aat of Dent du Midi, the Jagged
mountain which forms, with the famous
castle of Chlllon, the frame for the upper
waters of Geneva. The republic is nothing
more than a collection of little huts and
the meadow land near them. It Is governed
by four representatives, who are elected
Farmlna from the Library.
Nebraska farmers are much stirred by
the work of potato digging machines. At
Beaver Crossing, In Beward county, a spe
cial machine and gang of men are getting
out a big crop in a day or two which would
keep the old-time farmer, two hired men
and all the family breaking their backs
all the fall. It la getting so that farm
ing can be done from tha library,
are easily remedied. A glass of
Hamm's delicious beer just before re
tiring will bring restful and refresh
"Leads Them All"
Call for the
THEO. HAMM BREWING CO.
ST. PAUL, MINN.
J. E. DAVISON,
Manager Omaha Branch,
Telephones Douglas 397S and A.3978.
Watson has opened In Georgia, according
to reports, this being the first Intimation
that he had ever shut up.
Either candidate for president might
have cinched the vote of New York by
Inserting in his platform a plunk calling
for a five-cent fare to Coney island.
Two Bills, two Toms, two Eugenes and
a pair cf Johns, all decorating presidential
tickets, stamps 1P0S as a notable; year for
political pairs named alike, but most un
like. A leading southern paper has remarked
that the average southern fanner would
not give a five-cent glass of soda water
to have Bryan elected. Alas for that $1
farmer contribution fund!
The Buffalo Times Is Inclined to cheer
up because "unprejudiced observers In Ger
many and England think Bryan will win."
Still, It might be well to wait till IlussU
and France are heard from.
Colonel Guffey Insists that the Haskell
oil of Oklahoma doesn't smell any sweeter
because it bears the Kairvlew label. The
Pennsylvania article should be the better
one, having been fanned with shoe leather.
The Richmond News-leader reminded
Governor Swanson on his return from
Denver that "there are from l.oio to l.fVO
white democrats In Richmond, and fully
500 in Norfolk who this year Intend to vote
Governor Haskell of Oklahoma, assistant
carpenter on the Denver plutform, Is now
diligently plugging for a Standard Oil pipe
line In Oklahoma, and solic iting democratic
campaisn funds. J 1 a s k 1 1 Is energetic and
versatile, and knows what's whut.
To avoid annoying publicity of campnl;n
subscriptions of Il'JO or more, the democrats
of Indiana cut the rate to IW, and have in
vited the saloon Interests of the state
to step up with the wherewith. Subsi rilx rs
will get on the "roll of hi. nor." not fur
publication, but as a guuruntce of good
President Tuttle of the Boston anil
Maine road refuses to submit a ll-t of the
company's free pass holders Ht the demand
of R. W. Plllsbury of New Hampshire,
candidate for th republican gube -material
nomination. The latter charges that Uiu
company Is distributing some ?') annual
passes in that state, and that about to)
are sent to men whsu pollileal activity
la well known. Mr. Tuttle says that he is
not engaged In f uriill.tng campaign docu
ments for any candidate for governor.
MIHTIIKl I. It KM A It Kg.
"Why do they talk of the rudeness of
"I don't know. To my Idea nalur Is
very polite. Iook at the dip of the w.-ives,
the bend of the river, the boughs of the
trees." Daltlmore American.
"Morally courageous, isn't he?"
"I should say so. I've seen lilm refuse
to take (lie short end of a had le t at long
odds!" C'clvelsnd leader.
landlady's Son (addicted to nickel liter
ature Say, pardner, what's meant hy
"stand by to repel Imarders?"
Mr. Newcome (nidly eyeing- his dessert)
Slewed prunes. Judge.
Diiven to It by stern nerety, thu old
si lor had taken the Job of running an ele
vator. " 'Vast there, my hearty!" he said to the
fat man who was moving toward the side
of tho car. "I'll have to ask ye to stand
amidships. This craft has a heavy list to
pori. c nicuKO iriDune.
"Its really distressing to think." said
the wealthy Mr. Farrasy, "that many very
common and Ignorant pooplo will be ad-
mltted to heaven."
"Well, replied Mr. Cutting, "that needn't
worry you." Philadelphia Press. 1
"I admire patience an self-control," saltf
I'ncle Eben, "but when 1 see a man dais
kin keep on sinilln' afler ho done bruise his
thumb with a hummer, I can't help beln'j
s picinus oi nis capacity Ion deceit.
ton deceit. -
"Come." salel thp str.insr-mli-
"I'm sura thero'a burglars downstairs. Wt
win ko iniwn nna scare them away. t
"Well, Maria," stammered her hushand,'
"you g-g-Ko first: they wouldn't hit 1
woman." Philadelphia Ledger. i
Kicker How does that
church take til
such a lai'Ko collection?
Docker Was It taken up by a
New York Sun.
"What's In here?" asked thn tourist. I
"Remains to be teen," responded thi
guide, us he led the way Into the mummy
room. Puck. i
I (inks urn you notice tho flour on ths
crown or Dev. Mr. Nailer's hat this morn-
Winks Yes. He must bo srettinir nrot
dose to tho bottom of the barrel. Syracusa
TIIH OLD BR OK UN RECORD. I
How dear to Ills heart is the phonorraph't
What fond recollections my memory stlrf
Sweet Jam, lioes the winding and turns os
Whllr; 1 elt and tell her the tunes I prefer?
Hut, oh, how it tears iny nerve system t
Oh. hew It deranges my comfort and hllsi
When Jane. Idly Kllps on an old broket
record s i
Which reels olf n song that sounds som
thing like this: i
"The old oaka-' aka hucka-bucka-bucJe-l
Ir-r-r-r-r-r txiu-wow-wnw (crick ticket)-
("crick. crick, crick wkkkkoi j
Tim ,lf-L-l. L ,1. lit.
..... '.' v n i, if w-VI-l.
My stock of canned music I hall ai
For often when callors annear on (hit aoon.'
And topics are scarce It Is truly a pleasure
To bring out our dear Utile talking m
The time passes fjulckly and every one's
The phonograph pleases till Jane, so re,
Forgets dlMint winding the works of th
treat ure, i
Which lira w in out u tune that goes som
ining like this:
"D-e-ee J-i-l-i-t eeee ye
Ha-ha hum - h-h-h-hl e
T h -rererere s n o
Pl-pl pi -place lk- h-
We Are Hot
Through Vith You
When you buy Klae from us. the
inuii kuiisiy yon we guarantee
our work absolutely
Our vat expei lenes of 20 year
as exclusive Kye Blht 8peclll.
Opp. rsoylsa tore, raster em rramlsa)
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