1
Till: OMAHA Kl'XDAY 11KK: JULY 12. 190.
Telephone Douglas 618 Reaches All Departments.
Our Great Clearing Sale of Fine Petticoats
Commences
MONDAY
At O A. IVI.
A sale that moans a great saving to you on account of the high quality of the goods offered; linked with low
prices. All the black and colored silk petticoats, all the wush petticoats and all the black heatherbloom petticoats
to go in Monday's great clearing sale at the following reduced prices:
Wash Petticoats, regularly
fl.uO, Monday sale price,
each
sold at
.75c
Wash Petticoats, regularly
$1.75, Monday sale price,
each
sold at
..88c
Wash Petticoats, regularly sold at
$2.25, Monday sale price,
each Isls&Z
We have about 12 Lawn Petticoats in pale blue and pink,
which arc eomewhat faded by being In our show windows. These
petticoats Bold regularly at $1.50. Monday clearing sale price
25c.
All the black Petticoats regularly sold at $1.50 and $1.75,
Monday Clearing sale price $1.00.
All the fin black Heatherbloom Petticoats regularly sold at
$2.75, Monday Clearing sale price $1.76.
All the fine black Heatherbloom Petticoats regularly sold at
$4.50, Monday clearing sale price $3.00.
Silk Petticoats, in Black and Colors
All the fine Taffeta Silk Petticoats regularly Bold at $12.50.
Monday Clearing sale price $7.00.
Al the fina Taffeta Silk Petticoata regularly Bold at $10.50,
Monday Clearing sale price $8.50.
All the fine Taffeta Silk Petticoats regularly sold at $8.50,
Monday Clearing sale price $5.00.
All the fins Taffeta Silk Petticoata regularly sold at $C.OO,
Monday Clearing sale price $3.75.
Great Clearing Sale of Fancy Linens
Commencing Monday at 9 A. M.
These beautiful fancy linen pieces consist of real Cluny
Lare piece, Japanese drawn work Scarfs, embroidered Scarrs,
embroidered Lunch Cloths, embroidered Center Pieces, em
broidered Shams, worth up to $4.00, Monday your choice of
any of these pieces at, each $1.00.
Judging from the many inquiries we have had from these
goodH being displayed in our windows, there will be a lively
clearing. Como early.
Special $1.00 Pretty Novelty Silks,
Monday, Per Yard, 29c.
A variety of the most fashlonablo effects. Every piece of
silk is tip to our careful standard of quality. Notice the dainty
pretty patterns. The new Pekln stripes, dainty pin stripes,
here and there small broche figures, in the new Copenhagen
blue, heliotrope, green, etc., for costumes and waists. Your
choice Monday 29c.
Also the popular rough silk 27 Inches wide In gray and
garnet, $1.00 quality, at 29c per yard.
The Newest Wash Belts
You will find them here, and they are not high priced either.
Dainty linen belts embroidered In back only, finished with pearl
buckle, each 76c.
Pretty linen belts embroidered all around, finished with pearl
buckle, 75c, $1.00, $1.25 and $1.50 each.
Kor Monday we offer a few wash belts that have become Boiled
from display, at each, only 10c.
You will find here a wonderful variety of beltings for those
who wish to make up their belts.
White embroidered wash belting, also fancy beltings in brown,
navy, white and gold at lMiC, 2c, 3c, 4c an inch.
If its belts or beltings come here first.
Extra Specials for Monday
Special Clearing Sale of Wash Goods
The great sale that occurs ones a year, Is now on. Many women
nave ueeu waiting for It, and those tnat know come early vu
ecure the choicest styles.
Our 25c and 35c Scotch Madras and Zephyr Ginghams at, per
yard 15c.
Our 50c Silk Ginghams and plain colored Silk Mulls, at, per
yard 2 5c.
Our 60c R. A. Whitelaw & Sons Zephyr Ginghams, at, per
yard 25c.
Our 2 5c Voiles in checks and stripes at, per yard 15c.
Our 30c Linen Voiles, solid colors at, per yard 15c.
Our 25c, 30c and 40c Silk Mulls in solid colors, at yard, 15c.
And many other special bargains that you must see to apprec
iate them.
All the tailor suits in wool Special sale ot Lingerie Special sale of Separate Special Bale of ail House
goods at half price. Drosses. Skirts. for Monday.
i i i
"W. B. Reduso" Corsets
The perfect corset for large women. It places over-developed
women on the same basis as their slender sinters. By its scientific
construction It tapers off the bust and absolutely reduces the abdo
men and hips from 1 to S Inches without the aid of torturing; straps
or harness-like devices. If jwu are in need of this style do not fail
to trtup at our rirset department, second floor.
We also have a special bargain In bust supporters, reduced to
2!ic each. Just the thing to be worn with shirt waists. Ask to see
them.
Women's Neckwear Half Price Monday
One can tine more neckwear these days than ordinarily. Mon
day's sale offers an exceptional opportunity to lay In a supply at a
great saving.
Pretty summer stocks in white and colors, regular price 26c.
Monday your choice at, each, ltViC.
Fancy stocks In white and colors, regular price 76c and 60c.
Monday your choice at, each, 37 Vic and 25c.
A fine variety of Jabots In white and colors, regular prices $2.00
11.75-, $1.25, $1.00, 75c and COc; all go In Monday's salo at Just half
these prices.
Special Sale of Fine Nottingham Lace Curtains
!1.B0 White Nottingham I.ace Curtains at, per pair 9Bo
2.00 White Nottingham Lace Curtains at, per padr 11.39
2.50 White Nottingham Lacs Curtains at, per pair 81.78
$3.00 White Nottingham L.ace Curtains at, per pair $1.98
3.60 White Nottingham lace Curtains at, per pair $3.a
- See our Howard street window.
Special Clearing Sale of Wash Goods Remnants
The accumulation of remnants is tremendous, and forces us
to make prices extraordinary low. Goods that usually sell at 15c,
20c, 25c, 30c yard, you tan now buy in remnant lengths from
two to twelve yards, at. per yard, Monday only 6c.
When tired out from shopping,
visit our cool and cozy rest room.
Third floor. Manicuring la connection.
We close at S P. M. during July and Augrt, except
ing Saturdays M liSO 7. M.
U-7-12-S.
Real Indian Head shrunk Mus
lin for white suits. 36 inches wide
at 15c per yard. 45 Inches wide
at 20c per yard.
HARD KNOCKS AT THE DOOR
We passed In, while strong arm reached
out and rushed back Jones, following close
after. Ws heard the fateful word
"TVkrU"; Jones eager explaining that he
was consul to Japan and had an Impor
tsnt message to the chairman, and then
the same old request: "Move on, and don't
block up the stairs."
An hour later, after rllmhins? all over the
IMPOSING GREATNESS ON GUARD coliseum, and Interviewing doiens of af
fable but powerless gentlemen, we found a
Trying Experience of a Pilgrim Get
ting Into Chicago Convention.
Talks on Teeth
The Gospel ol Good Teelh.
We are going to preach a short sermon. (
taking our text from "llie iioenci i w
Teelh.
worried official who hung the official
hardware upon our coats and turned us
loose, privileged to roam about the con
vention hall and sit down In any seat that
wasn t occupied.
The F.lephant Trick.
In the evening, tired and footsore from
A national political convention Is a small Mng po-stled about the hall. I met Jones
Fifty Thousand reople with ft "roll"
Trr It on Policemen, t'shera and
Doorkeepers The F.lephant
tlnb Trick.
body of delegates entirely surrounded by
personal, friends who have no tickets, it Is
held as a rule lni a great hall which seats
lR.niio, who are trying to nominate n presi
dent. But that Is the smallest part ot the
convention. Outside of the hall are BO.Ono
people, who are struggling with the terrific
task of trying to gt In
again. He was radiantly happy.
"Go In?" I asked.
"Of course," said Jones, throwing back
his head, and ermhollng his thumbs.
Didn't I tell you that 1 always attend a
national convention?"
"How did you do ItT" I asked.
8-s-h," said Jones. He pulled from his
When I arrived In Chicago last week, the pocket a little gilt button wHh an elephant
first mnn I saw was Jones. Jones has
attended rvrry republican national conven
tion In the last twenty years. The first
time he went In on a ticket. Four years
later he went through the door behind
fat man. Fnur years after thnt a friend
gave him a red cross badge, and he dashed
Into the Coliseum with a medicine case,
waving back the doorkeeper Imperiously.
The next convention he found a window that
wasn't guarded. The next time he dis
guised himself as an assistant Janitor, got
in at 4 n. m., and hid In the basement hall
Until the opening, six hours later.
At homes, Jones Is an ex-mayor, a poll-
upon It. "Bee that?" he said. I mei
Clarke downtown at noon, and he gave me
that button. Told men to go to the door
K T, put this button In my coat, find a
doorkeeper with a button of the same
kind on, walk up to him, tap him twlcs on
the vest front, say: 'Oood morning, Bill,'
and pass In. I did It and It worked Ilka a
charm. The elephant club Is the best yet."
"Hut how did you get a seat?" I asked.
"Easiest thing In the world," ea!J Jones.
The ushers are all green, anyway. 1 picked
the best seat 1 could find, and when the
usher came to put m out, I tapped my
button and asked him If he didn't know
better than to order a member of the
tlclan of some Importance, and a director state central committee around'-Qeorge
in a Dame, in Chicago last week he was pitch In Collier s Weekly.
one ii me w.vw people wno were trying to
get Into a conversion hall that would seat. ONE PIRATED VICTORY AT GOLF
hi tne ouisme, ls.ono people. There was this
difference between Jones and some of the llaffy's "kill I'selee When Opposed
others. Jones knew ho was going to get In. by Schmidt's Base Ball Tactics
lie had always gotten In. It was contrary "Speaking of excitement," said the ex
to precedent that he shouldn't get In, He professional to a bunch of golf enthusiasts
didn't know how he was going to do It, "I have always held that a man should
but he had always done It, and he has the when playing hold down the, lid on his fitio-
politician's reverence for precedent. I tlons. ' Last summer I saw a man named
'Who are they going to nominate?" I Baffy lose a match he wanted badly to
aRked, using the popular form of salu-1 w,n because he got separated from hit
self-control.
'A base ball player named Schmidt
pirated the victory. He had a big contempt
for the grand Scotch game, and whenever
it was mentioned he uttered considerable
disdainful prattle. Baffy overheard and
they had a heated argument that ended by
the base ball player, though he had never
seen a links, betting that he could trim the
golfer at his own game.
"The next day they got together on the
links of the Swattle Country club. Schmidt
won the honor. He handled the driver as
awkward as a schoolboy walttes, but he
hit the ball a sledge hammer blow and got
off a IDO-yard drive,
"He threw down his club and ran after
tatlon.
vvnat do I care about that?'' said
Jones, Impatiently; "I've bigger business
than that on hand. Let the delegates at
tend to that. I've got to get Into that
nan. ueen here since last night and
haven't struck a lead yet."
"Tickets scarce?" I asked.
scarce, said Jones, explosively. "Man,
there are more north poles sticking up In
tront or barber shops that theie are conven-
tion tickets. I never saw such confounded
absence of accommodation In my life. I've
been to five conventions, and I swear there
are less tickets every year. I believe the
Idiots only print 1.000 tickets and make the
rest of us work our way In. It s enough to the ball at top speed. We yelled like a
make a man lost his faith In the tariff." calliope for him to stop, but ho kept going
"There are seventy-five fellows from our until he had his foot on the ball. We lug
own town here," continued Jones, plain, god out his slicks and were five minutes
tlvely, "and only eleven of thorn are fixed, hitting him In the understanding with the
tour years ago we gave the blpgcst re- fuet that sprinting Isn't a part of golf.
publkun majority In the stato, too. It's "This contretemps had Baffy woozy with
awful. Tho congressman can't do any- laughter. His mirth got so abundant that
thing. He's been trying to get a ticket he was off his poise on his swing. He
for his wife all morning. They say sen- sliced Into the jungle and used three more
ator got 100 tickets this morning for t0 Set backJnto the paths of navigation
his business friends. Damn these sen- "This had him shaken with temper, and
tors anyway! I know a man who knows hlB riext shot he went back Into the tall
the senator, and I've been trying to find fdJt,r. Schmidt had a lie on a heap of
him all morning, but I don't suppose It Ioose Brass and poked the ball Into the sky.
will do any good. Baffy was hurrying on with his eye glued
"Oh. I ll pet In all right," he continued to the 8pot where his ball had disappeared.
hastily. "I'd like to see the convention MUlt ' ou "Bter: Bchmldt yelled,
You owe It to yourself and to those de
pending upon vnu, or with whom you as
sociate, to rnrllate good healih, and you
can t radiate sood health unless you have
good teeth. Honin of us live to eat, but
we must all en l lo live, and If we don't
eat properly and masticate our food proper
ly, we won t live long. There ueeu 10 ne.
some excuse for those people, who had
missing teeth, or whose teeth were loose
for tue only iixkim mice they could se
cure was from a partial plate, which Is a
very poor substitute, or, from ordinary
bridge work, that is hut little better when
It comes to appearance. Hy our Improved,
method we guarantee to give you teeth
that are as serviceable and beeiutlful as
your natural teeth. These teeth once. In
the mouth are as firm ard solid as a
rock. If your teeth are loose, we tighten
them and cure lyorrhea (diseased gums )
If vou are skeptical and doubt as to our
ability, we can give yvu ail the proof
that la necessary to convlee you that we
ran do all we claim. If you live, at a dis
tance and cannot call at oneo ws wilt
gladlv mall you our booklet on the origi
nal Alveolar method along with a book of
testimonials. We practice the original Al
veolar method and this work cannot be had
west of Chicago, outside of our office.
Beware of Imitators using the word Al
veolar. We do all work pertaining to the
care of the tenth. Have you seen our Al
veolar crowns?
Dr. E. R. L. Murphy
510 N. Y. Lite Bldrj., Omaha.
Formerly consulting and examining den
tlst with G. Gordon Martin.
" 'I didn't even swing,' Baffy returned.
" 'You made a balk!' yelled Schmidt.
"Before hostilities could cominenco I
again explained to Schmidt that he was
thinking on the wrong side of tho street.
But Baffy was sore and his play went far
to the bad. 8chmldt showed his lack of
form and each registered seven strokoa
getting to the green.
"Bnffy's ball lay close to Schmidt's about
an Inch back. He putted, and Instantly
8chmldt made a sweep with his broom
that sent Baffy's pallet f tn0 Brccn and
his own into the hole.
" 'What do you mean by that?" Baffy
shouted.
" 'I was only working the squeeze game,'
Schmidt answered.
"Baffy replied by slamming Bchmldt In
the chest with his putter. I got them un
tangled finally and started In to coach
Schmidt.
"But Baffy's nerve was gone and he was
beaten, two up, with a medal score of t22."
hall I can't get into. But this time I
want to go In respectable. I'm tired of
crawling in windows. I'm getting along
In years. I want to go up to one of those
infernal doorkeepers and shove a printed
ticket half-way down his throat. I'm
going to do it, too, but there are only
three hours loft. Come along, and maybe
I'll get you In."
Chasing Chips.
Now you've got It. Look out!'
What's the matter?' Baffy said, as
tonished, turning around.
You've misjudged It,' the ball player
eald In an insulting tone.
' 'What game do you thing you're play
ing, you Idiot?' Baffy asked.
"Schmidt thought Baffy was trying to
catch his fly and attempted to rattle him.
By the time we had explained Baffy had
mislaid his bearings as to where his ball
mltee your 'dissent as to the provision of
federal action within state lines."
How Psrkrr ot-l.
trary we will give our loyal support to fas
action of the convention, and In this our
action will be entirely consistent. We hava
UNIFORM BILL OF LADING
Judge Parker hesitated a moment, ana "V. "Z TVder.1 Tcmrniaainn flivM Section
ivia in ine uuiuiiii un; diiurcu a . ci j ,,,- - v v u. -
then replied:
"I don't like any secrecy In public af
fairs, and I don't mind telling you that I
did record my dissent from tho platform
on account of this and certain other provis
ions, as I propose to fight this battle over
again In some later convention. The situa
tion was Just like this: I and a few others
wont into tho platform committee differing
with other members on the question of re
sisting federal encroachments on state home
rule. Wo were confronted with a marked
difference of views. But let mo say that
throughout the long and trying sessions of
the committee there wb never any varla-
row margin of only four votes against us ; to New Form.
on this niOHt Important provision on which .
we differ. On the other hand, the Boose- I
volt administration Is clmmltted irrepara- TWO KINDS ARE RECOMMENDED
bly to central domination over the states, j ,
Our choice, therefore. Is plain. It la with 0lle 0, to H Certaln Decree of
wie puny wnose irauiuons are lor me con-
I Negotiability Adoption by the
Itailroads Is Greatly
Desired.
Ktitutional effect of the states against fed
eral encroachment. We not only support
the ticket, but our only hope of preserving
the status quo on these doctries is to elect
the ticket. Those who feel as I do wilt
understand that a republican senate will
never consent to turn over 10 a aemocratio . ,,. ... , .... ,h m,,t nf
i UliiB IIUW 111 wnu v w .-- - -
WASHINGTON. July 11 A new uniform
I mil OI laaing aesigneu am a nuuawium
president any further extension of power.
tlon from the utmost good .feeling amjng Aml thu, tne preent situation will be con.
the members. The spirit of give and take ti,ulcd unt. we shall have another oppor
always prevailed. It made me feel glad tunlty to fight another battle within party
:hat I had attended the convention. It also lines."
gave me the point of view of those hav
ing honest differences of opinion with me
n questions of principles. Whllo some of
the contentions urgee by part of my as
sociates wore contrary to those of my ed
acatlon and belief, yet I could not but feel
that they were as sincere and honest In
their convictions as I was In mine. The
one dominating sentiment was to formulate
platform which would state honestly to
ie public the views of Its framers."
K up port i.f Tlelte ti---
It was suggested to Judge Parker that
ilnce he had dissonted from this provision
f the platform he and his friends might
kestltate to support the ticket.
"Not at all," he replied. "On the con-
1
3
MIIIIXEK W1U, GO TO LINCOLN
John W. Kern Will Visit Mr. Bryan
on Hie War Home.
INDIANAPOLIS, Ind.. July 11. Tele
grams received here last night from John
W. Kerrj, democratic candidate for vice
president, announce that he will remain at
Denver until Monday, when he will go to
Lincoln with the members of the national
democratic committee to call on Mr. Bryan.
Mr. Kern will reach Chicago Wednesday
and will return to Indianapolis Thursday.
Arrangements are being made for his re
ception here.
A big civic celebration is being planned.
Mayor Book waiter and John Hollett, pres
ident of the Commercial club, who is pres
ident also of the Indiana Democratic club,
have begun arrangements.
'It must be an affair In which the people
of Indianapolis, Irrespective of party, will
be asked to participate," said the mayor
today. "When Vice President Fairbanks
returned home after his nomination, one
of the happleet and heartiest addressee of
welcome was made by John W. Kern."
u u
$40 AISD $30
SUMMER SUITS
THIS WEEK CNLY
$20.00
MAHK-TO-OIIDF.R
SCAD si XM OUai,
Herzog Tailoring CO.
NATIONAL COMMITTEE COMING
.
Special Train Will Bear Members te
I.lneoln.
' DENVER, July 11. A special train bear
ing the members of the national committee
and newspaper correspondents to call upon
William J. Bryan, the democratic nomi
nee for president, will leave here for Lin
coln over the Chicago, Rock Island & Pa
cific railroad at I o'clock Monday evening.
Mrs. Ruth Bryan-Leavltt also will be
with the party. They will arrive at Lin
eoln at 8 o'clock .Tuesday morning.
Beta! Loral Bid.
fcfcerman e I ndergo Operation.
I'TICA. N. Y., July ll.-Jamee S. Sher
man, the republican vice presidential can
didate, waa well enough today to visit his
business office and remo,tn there an hour.
He expecta a visit from Chairman Hitch
cock of the national committee some time
next week. It la announced that Mr.
Sherman will be operated on In one of
the hospitals In this city, probably ten
days or two wekt hi
niUoellaneuus freight and general mer
chandise was today approved and Its
adoption recommended to the common car
riers of the country and the shipping public
by the Interstate Commerce commission,
The new bill ot lading provides two
forms, printed on the face side In different
colors, one for "straight" and one for
"order" consignments. The "order" bill
will possess a certain degree of negotiabil
ity, while the "straight" bill will be non
negotiable.
The "order" bill must be surrendered
upon delivery of the property to the con
slgnee. This plan Is expected to largely
meet the requirements of the banking con
corns of the country which advance vaat
sums of money on bills of lading. The
changes have all been in the direction of
greater simplicity In the Interest of the
shipping public. The bill Is more or less a
compromise. It Imposes Important obliga
tions which carriers have not heretofore
assumed, but retains exceptions to which
some shippers may object. The commission
recommends that the new bill be adopted
generally on September 1.
Hwltrk Cod nee tlons.
The Interstate Commerce commission to
day announced a doclslon holding that tne
Hepburn act does not grant plenary dis
cretion to the commission to refuse an
application for switch oonectlons with lat
eral branch roads. It decides that it is
the duty of 'nterstate commerce carriers
to conect with a lateral branch road if
reasonably predicable, safe and justified
by sufficient business, upon application of
either the lateral line or the shipper.
The case was that of the Rahway Valley
railroad, lying entirely within the limits of
Union county. New Jersey, the commis
sion ordering the Delaware, I.ckawanna
Wectern to furnish switch collection at
Summit, N. J.
Dr. Cook Heard From.
NEW YORK. July 11. Dr. Frederick A.
Cook of Brooklyn, the explorer, who Is
Irvine- to reach the north pole by a new
route through the Nanses strait and whose
friends were fearful that he had met dis
aster In the frosen north, has been heard
from. A letter written by the explorer
last December, wss received today by his
wife, who Is living in Brooklyn, staling
that he hoted to start for lila goal in
January. No word had been received
from Ir. Cook since last October.
Advertise In The Bee; It goes Into the
homes of the bet people.
LATEST WORD IN BATTLESHIPS
England Starts In to Dent Its Otto
Record Chn nates In Big
Gnus.
When the Dreadnought was laid down,
only three years ago, it was said that It
would reduce all existing battleships to
the scrap heap. The St. Vincent tegun at
the end of last December, was said by a
British naval authority In a burst of
rather tropical enthusiasm to be "Infin
itely" superior to the Dreadnought. "In
finitely" In that case probably mea.it
about JO per cent. Now the Ixmdon Tele
graph asserts that a new type Is to bo
laid down to eclipse the St. Vlhceit.
The Dreadnought Is of 17,X) tons and the
it. Vincent of 19,!KO. The new monster is
expected to reach 21,000. But site la in be
one of tho least of Its distinctions. It is
to go back to 13.6-lnch guns, abandoned In
the British navy for all ships within the
last seventeen years. The modern twclve
incM fifty-elght-ton gun, firing an 860-pound
projectile at 2.000 feet per second, has a
muzxlo energy over one-third greater than
that developed by one of the 13.5-inch
sixty-nlne-ton guns of the Royal Sover
elgn, which fires a 1.200-pound shell at 2,016
feet per second, and it will pierce seven
tetn Inches of Krupp steel armor ut 3,0u0
yards, whllo the Royal Sovereign's guns
will pierce only eleven Inches. The size
of guns oscillates from age to age. Over
tot) years ago the Turks had some that
would have held Mr. Taft In comfort. They
used to fire stone cannon balls that weighed
600 pounds apiece. Then the pieces grew
smaller for ease of handling, and when
better methods of handling were Invented
they grew larger again. At one time the
Italian navy had guns of 17 Inches, firing
shells that weighed a ton apiece. The lust
American battleships to carry lS-lnch guns
were the Alabama, Illinois and Wisconsin,
launched ten years ago. The largest since
that have been the 12-Inch. Now It seems
that bigger weapons are to be In fashion
again.
A still more remarkable innovation In
the new British ship Is to be the use ot
gas engines, making funnels unnecessary.
Among other advantages, this will remove
the temptation for careless persons In air-
chips to drop bombs down the smokestacks,
Max Pemberton equipped his Iron Ilrate
with gas engines fifteen years ago, pre
dicting that this would be the motive power
for the fleets of the future another 11
lustration, like so many In the career of
Jules Verne, of the superiority of fiction
over fact. The gas engine threatens to
end the reign of the turbine before It has
fairly begun.
It Is estimated that the proponed Brit
lah super-Dreadnougnt will cost fcomethlng
like (II 600,000. Of course it could not be
duplicated In this country for less than
(16.000,000. and If we take the lead in the
competition with 26.0U-ton snips, as Mr.
Hobson urges, we must be prepared to pay
at least 120,OCO,000 apiece for them. And
about that time a 00,000 flying machine
mav send them all to the museum of
anllqullUs.-Colller's Weekly.
We went over to the Annex. It was lay. It was hopelessly lost, and he gave ud
lull or solemn men who were discussing, the hole, pink with rage.
not presidential candidates, but door- "Schmidt reached the green with his next
krepers. We met In rapid succession a shot, lie tussled manfully with the putter,
supervisor, an Alderman, a member of the but Is cost him four to hole out. He did'nt
legislature, and three members of the I y much, but whispered something to his
county central committee from our city, caddy, who ran off.
In each case tho salutlon wus the same: The next hole was a four bogey. Baffy
"Where can I cet a ticket?" haJ himself in hand and both players
We found Teller from our town. He la drove close to the green. Schmidt grabbed
elwcys an assistant sergeant-at-arms, but one ot nls irons and made an approach
mat surprised himself. The pellet ran dead
we looked In vain for the three-pound
piece of bronie hardware which dlstln
gulslies this Impressive personage. Teller
was mad about It, too. "Here's my com
mission." he complained, waving a piece
of parchment as elaborately engraved as a
bank-note. "And just because I didn't
coine up here lust Saturday and call for
my badge, they've given It to some other
fellow. They'll got this blamed conven
to the hole. Then we all jumped, for
Schmidt yelled and made a tremendous
slide.
" ' He's craiy!' Baffy exclaimed.
"Schmidt got up sheepishly and brushed
himself.
" 'I got a little excited.' he said, grinning.
"Baffy was boiling over with contemnt
and topped his approach, letting go a two
foot shove, lie Wpnt .ln.a , , V. . . ...
Hon so perfected pretty soon that nobody hl. nt, n(1 lt wa Bchmldt . put.
at all can get Into It. .., ,,, nm, ,. .,
- " " "O " i' .m iiauuuu
'Of course, I can got In," he hastened
to add; "Lowden or Johnson or Clarke or
any of the boys will got rne In. But that
Isn't the point. I want to get out again.
want to got out on the sidewalk and
got our boys In. Four years ago I had
n underground railroad started ton min
utes after I pot my budge. We got every
him a broom.
What are you going to do with that''
Baffy demanded.
I'm going to put with it," Schmidt re
piled
" 'No, you're not, you mullet head!" Baffv
yelled.
"Schmidt demanded to be sh own uhv i,t
Peoria man in while there wro thousands and Baffy pulled out a book of rule. ri
waiting on tho outside. This Is an out- flipped the leaves like counting mn.
rage. I'm going down to the coliseum to but he failed to dig up a statute prescribing
w ouuui n. i or proKcriDin a elven form . ni,
Knocking at the Door,
Doorkeeper Ticket.
Prominent Citizen I have an appoint
ment with senator
Doorkor per Ticket
Stars and Stripes
"The ball player grabbed the bundle of
splints and with a strong sweep sent the
ball into tho depression.
"Baffy waa so furious he couldn't sneak.
His anger had him excited and he putted
Prominent Cltlxen I tell you I have an six times In finding the cup,
appoint
Doorkeeper -Have you a ticket?
Prominent Citizen No, I haven't but
If I can find sen"
Policeman Don't block up the stairs.
Step down.
Prominent Citizen This Is an out
Another Policeman -You can't stand on
the walk In front of the door. Move on
Prominent Citizen How will I get my
ticket If I can't get-
Third Policeman You can't stand In the
street. Move on.
After witnessing one or two of these
tragedies, we went timidly up to a colored
mun who wora a doorkeeper's badge and
was bursting at the seams with grandeur.
To him we bowed humbly and presented
commissions calling for an 'assistant ser-
geant-at-arms Duage ana a press Daage u tent hU ba aheaa accompanied
presented to a gentlen.an wnnm no one naa rhunk of turf
ever been able to find two days before the
"At the next tee Schmidt swatted foehlv
far to the left of the driving hump. Baffy
made a desperate swing and moved the pill
176 yards ahead. He turned to gloat, hut
made only a strangling sound. Schmidt
bad picked up his ball and was preparing
to drive again.
'What are you trying to do?" Buffy
yelled.
" 'That's a foul and didn't count. I'm
driving again,' Schmidt replied.
"Baffy waa beside himself. He yanked
forth his book of rules and hurled lt into
the ball player's face.
"When Schmidt found out he was wrr.ng
he apologized and dropped the ball hack
Into the grass. He had two swipes dlrclng
lt out and then drove up a little ahead of
Baffy. The golfer waa so fussed that he
hy a
convention began at a sptclfled hour.
'I don't want them things." said the
magnificence rudely; "tickets."
"These call for tickets," we said.
"Don't core what dey call for. You-all
got tickets?"
Innocent Spectators.
Then we becumo the victims of the same
highly perfected system, by which one
policeman after another eased us off the
steps, off the sidewalk, off the street, and
out of the vicinity. We stood and watched
the throng. There was nothing else to do.
It was a sad-eyed, but hopeful, crowd.
There were veteran republicans who had
attended every convention for thirty years
young men, powerful In the wards at
home; men with plenty of Influence with
the wrong people; men who had to get
Into that hall or acknowledge themselves
un Inaitrnlfteftnt noli t trail V.
TkCn . stormed the dr.or. ourselves stance that fitted his feet He nisde
once more, and fotfnd a doorkeeper wKh backward swing, but stopped and shifted
more resDect for Harry New's signature I his pedal poise.
than the negro doorkeeper had evinced. " 'Una stroke SclinUdt suld.
"Schmidt swung vigorously, but mlssoU
the globe.
" "One stroke,' Daffy said cheerlngly.
" 'No, that's a strike,' Schmidt answere.1.
Baffy looked confused and the ball player
again walloped the oxygen.
" "Two strokes.' Baffy said.
" 'No, two strikes," Schmidt returned.
" "Call 'em what you like, you owe your
self a pair of swats,' said Baffy.
" 'I haven't mado a stroke until I've
msde three strikes,' Bchmldt insisted.
"Baffy made a lip for his antagonist,
but I Jumped in betaeen. Then I told
Schmidt that his ideas on golf needed a
recount. I got them playing on peaceful
terms again, though Schmidt !eit on put
ting with his broom, and that inaie Baffy
ache with anger.
"At the tenth tee Baffy's nerves were
playing leapfrog, and he couldn't find a
Oh. What Jor.
"Cured at last! Oh. what Joy to think
that I have at last been cured of that awful
bowel trouble," pre the words of A. O.
Butler of Cold Springs, Tex., who suffered
off and on for twelve months with a dis
order of his bowels, and finally, after
almost giving up In despair, was cured by
Chamberlain's Colic, Cholera, and Diar
rhoea remedy. No one need suffer fnvn
colic or diarrhoea for this remedy always
gives prompt relief. For salo by all drug
gists. Dostoneae Hase Hall.
The seml-clrcular erections were spirit
ually magnificent with their bevies of Bark
Hay beauties seated thereon when the or
ganization from Harvard traversed the
Held In a gentlemanly fashion. One student
seized tho willow where It gave the greatest
levnBO and st-mk a graceful attitude.
However, he struck nothing else, for ho
who evolves the sphere now entered Into
a series of remarkable contortions from
which the globe finally emerged., describ
ing a perfect rarftbola. whose orbit seemed
unapproachable to the disconcerted scient
ist. The process being repeated three con
secutive times, the unfortunate student re
tired, bursting into tears.
His successor out more successful, suc
ceeding In approaching Into closer prox
imity to the spheroid, which he ejected
Violently Into the len-nanti pruu -.
lt passed peacefully away Into the hands of
an unsympathetic barbarian.
(At this point the reporter was ejected.)
Harvnrd Iiniboon.
Skinned trout Head to Heel
was Ben Pool, Threet, Ala., when drnir-'
god over a gravel roadway; but Buek
len's Arnica Salve cured hltn. 25c. For
siile by Beaton Drug Co.
The Plumber's Derby.
The compasslonato citizen remarked to
his plumber: "Gus, If 1 wore a plumber
and hnd to crawl Into small nooks and
corners as you do. I'd wear a soft hat or
cap. Why, your derby Is full of dents.
(Jus replied: "I'd be a fool to wear a soft
hat; this derby has saved my head rnnny
a hard knock from pipe" and beams. See;
I have It packed with crumpled news
papers, which give me both Inspiration and
immunity. New York Press.
Represents
the Best
AFullBotile
of Merit
Is in a bottle of
"Stars and
Stripes." For a
pure and delici
ous beverage li
bus no equal. The
ingredients are
the best to be ob
tained. It is s
builder of men. Increases the
weight, makes iure, rich blood.
strong;, healthy bone, bard, solid
flesh and a good clour, clean com
plexion. The best of Toulcs
better than any medicine for the
sick and the convalescent. If you
have not panned Judgment on
"Stars and Stripes" as yet, order
a trial case or two without
question we will have furtuer
orders.
1.60 In Green Trading KtampH
(15 stamps) with each two
dozen case of small Q1 OC
bottles. Price liZU
$3.00 in Green Trading btamps
(30 stamps) with each two dozen
case of large bottles. ) fir
I'rice 0i&3
Out of town customers add
$1.2 j for cas3 and bottles.
WILLOW SPRINGS
BREWING CO.
Office, 1407 Hsrnsy t.
Vhoae Douglas 1308.
Brewera 34 and Kickory Its.
rasas Xoug-la IMiH
4
X. atek. fttrr.
