TtlE OMAHA SUMJAi' AihtZ. JluSK 7, 1908.
iT.i& Omaha Sunday Deb
FOUNDED. BT EDWARD ROSEWATER
VICTOR ROSEWATER. EDITOR,
Entered at Omaha Poatofflca a cond
clase matter.
-
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CORRESPONDENCE.
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A i I
STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION :
State of Nebraska, Doufla County. M.:
George B. Taechuck, 1 treaaurer at Th
Bee Publishing company, being duly sworn
aya that the actual number of full ana
complete copies of The Datly, Mornin,
Evening and Hunday Bee printed durtng
the month of May. 108. waa a iohow,.
i
a. Se,890
.... 36,700
4 94,690
B 34,640
34,680
f 34,810
... 34,370
. .......... .34,100
10 .....34,800
11 34450
13 34410
13 36,180
1 36.0SO
15..... 3MM
14,, 84,100
T 86,030
i!!.'."!'!!!lao60 and the8e committees will act as ad
ao!!!!..ri. . .35,830 vlsera to the American teachera, Intro
81 :38,30 d,,ce tnem ln tne 8Chools to be In
ns ... .35,860 ,
gJ ...35400 "Ccted, arrange for their hotel accom-
84.
87-
34,800
.55,90
384i0
w'.'.'.'.'.V.'.'.'.'.Z,60
i a,04
- . v4.i80.6so
Leas unsold and returned copies. s.bbo
Ket total'. ,.... 1,110,710
Daily averse m,83s
Subscribed in
my presence and sworn
to before me thla 1st day of June. lo.
n nr a r r IT j
Notary Public.
WHEX OUT OF TOWN.
Sakecrlbers levTLar the city tern
pra.rllr aho14 . Sara The Be
mallet to tkeaa. Addreee will be
ekaased mm ettes m reaeated.
A distinguished New York physician
bj uiau umj t"
But ha doesn't. I
The south reports a record-breaking
Beach croD. Bring them on. Ne-
braeak baa cream to spare.
"WlU congress be missed?" asks the
Cleveland Leader. Yes, indeed, by
the newspaper paragraphers. )
Mr. Debs insists that he expects to I
be elected president The unexpected
will happen ln Mr. Debs' case.
"Do insects have a language:" bbkb
ft Bchool boy reader., . Certainly, j . or
alee why would we have the spelling
be?
Speaker Cannon insists that he
takes his presidential candidacy serl
ously. , "Uncle Joe" persists in being
different from other folks.
Having once been sentenced to death
by the Boer republic, John Hays Ham
mond is not afraid to become a caadl
date for the vice presidency.
vliCUUiutjB , auu vuutruLiuvuv
i . . . I I
tho title nf an editorial in the Boston
Globe. it'B a misnomer. Cucumbers
and contentment are strangers.
The Fanamans must tell their trou-
bles to somebody, bo the president has
sent a bunch of marines down there to
remain until after the election.
Thomas F. Ryan, refuses to discuss
that 120,000 contribution to the dem
ocratic campaign fund ln Nebraska.
Mr. Ryan lets his money talk for him.
New York newspapers insist upon
charging Mr. Jerome with inactivity,
although he has proved that he 1b one
of the niftiest dice throwers in the big
town. . .
Banker Forgan of Chicago says that
Mr. Bryan does not know what a bank
deposit is.. Posslaly that 20,000
from Ryan came in the form of a cer
tificate of deposit.
"It takes four years to train a lion,"
Bays the Washington Post. It takee
longer than that to train a tiger, as
Mr. Bryan can testify, after his expert-
ence with Tammany.
A corporation has been formed In
Buffalo to produce a noiseless type
writer. Some advantages ln that per
haps, but if she Is deaf how la she go
ing to take dictation? . .--"""
Arkansas democrats refused to send
Senator Jeff Davis as a delegate to
the Denver convention, apparently
Just" to prove that they have lucid in-
tervals occasionally, even In Arkanaas.
Speaker Cannon says he does not
believe it would be worth while for
him to open campaign headquarters
at Chicago. The speaker knows when
he Is in the error column la the score
book.
Mr. Bryan's lecture on "The Prince
OI reace WOUId go better If he did
not have to Stop SO often to show fight
to Ryan and others who have been
slipping money to Bryan's lieutenants
. ,
VU iu uij.
Mr. Bryan says the paramount issue
this year will be effective regulation
of railway rates and he has already
explained that the only effective regu-1 publication a long as possible, doubt
latlon must come through governmeut I leaa .hoping hat Funk might be pre-
ownership of the roads.
AMVRKAH TtACBEltB ABROAD, '
The educational problem U always
one. of. deep concern to American
phrenu and to officials charged with
llhe conduct of tb public schools and
'other institutions of learning, and
every 'step looking to the aolutlon of
any of the questions In connection with
the achoola la ivorthy of heartiest en
couragement. The National Civic
federation la putting Into effect a
movement that promises to make an
Important contribution to the Diana for
general educational advancement by
arranging to send 600 American public
school teachera on a trip to Europe
during the coming fall and winter for
the Inspection - of achoola and school
teaching. is
The plan la the outcome of a visit of
BOO British school teachera, to thla
country,
three years ago, under the
auspices of the English Educational
commission. Mr. Alfred Mosely of
London, chairman of that commission,
has generously undertaken to make all
the Brrana.ernanU for thn rcp,nt,on .nil
comfort of, the American teachers when
they arrive In Eugland next winter, and
will,, secure the co-operation of the
schools to be visited. Local commit
tees have been formed of teachera and
I I Al . . . .
educational women in earn , town to
be visited by the American teachers
4 36,100 modatlona and minister to their com
as 34,030 OPt ln Mrv w,v
... j
The National' Civic federation has
wisely decided that best results may
be accomplished by having the Amerl
can teacners travel . in small groups,
not Mceedfng ten on any one vessel
The visit will, it Is planned, last from
1 .1. Tl - .
l ounrus ui euucauon
have been invited to designate t'.i2
w "uviu I "V BUflUlBgO Ul"
fered by the National Civic federation
. .,, fc ' v
"wa v O1 .- KUU II Ca J U U ODIVCU
to continue the salaries of the teachers
selected, during their proposed absence
from their home schools. The move
ment Is one of such obvious profes
sional advantage to the teachera and
through them to the schools with
which they are connected that there
Bhould be no hesitancy anywhere ln
accepting the plans of the federation
iuu guuiug in ine movement tooKing
to the ultimate gain of the public
schools.
RIADIKO TBROVQH TBS BOLUS.
The reader of the Just published
book called "The Real Bryan," com
piled by his co-iaoorer on ine wm
moner, R. L. Metcalfe, and purporting
to be made up of extracts irom an oi
his speeches that are worthy preserv
ing. will be struck by two notable
omissions
j In tho .fore-word Mr. Metcalfe Bays
that in choosing the paragraphs re
prjnted he hasbeen guided by his Idea
of what n0uld be entitled to rank as
"eloauent and instructive." and it la
to be assumed that nothing properly
within this classification would have
been passed by by such a friendly and
admiring commentator. But nowhere
"between the two covers of the book Is
there a single word or sentence out of
the famous "Cross of Gold" Bpeech,
credited with having procured Mr
Bryan's nomination In the Chicago con
ventlon and popularly supposed to be
, Vt a T3iven m a Btcrnlai Th VAfrtlPf
- - .
Of the compiler of the book called
"The Real Bryan" Is that nothing ut-
tered by Mr. Bryan ln the 1896 con
ventlon Is eloquent, or instructive, or
worth preserving
The second anomaly is the total ab
sence of any quotation expressive of
Mr. Bryan's views on government own
ership of railroads. His declaration
for a system of trunk lines operated
by the national government and
branches by the state governments
was the "piece de resistance" of his
home-coming address In the Madison
Square garden two years ago. And
his position on the subject waa pub
licly explained later In Connecticut
and ln Kentucky. Yet nothing that
Mr. Bryan bas said on government
ownership of railroads comes up to
Mr- Metcalfe's test of what 1b eloquent,
or Instructive, or worth preserving
While It has many merits, Mr. Met
calfe's book strikingly recallsjhe story
of the Inquisitive wife who bought a
second newspaper In order to read
through the holes what her husband
had cut out of the expurgated copy
which he brought her
AS IDEAL CAKL1DATR QC1TS.
Mr. Bryan and his enthusiastic fol
lowers may take heart. The real
danger that threatened the fortunes of
theNebraskan at Denver has been re
moved. Charles E. Funk of Kansas
has formally announced that he will
not be a candidate for the demo
cratic nomination for the presidency
and will leave the field to Bryan or
any other candidates who may desire
to strive for the honor. The retire
ment of Mr. Funk from the race is
made public by this letter from him to
tD Denver Republican, which, while
staunchly republican, has been mildly
encouraging the Funk boom:
Meada, Kan.. May X, 1808.
Have gave up running (or president. I
see they don't know anything, nor can
thev H ' md with flikh Inv ntmt
ought to be proud that they had a m.
who knew enough to be president. There
u no Pria, to ,h honor " siory of
1 mi l " iver. i mngs
1 l UUUO VH 1111 WU BWnSOT B IIU IHVD
I . th neonia. but r rriiv limrt.i
I One hundred and one other things could be
said.
CHARLES E. FUNK.
As max be Judged from the date, the
Denver editors withheld the letter from
I vailed upon to reconsider and to again.
agree to stand upon the platform which
he gaily and bllthesomely announced
his Intention to make the canvass for
the retirement of Bryan and other
aspirants. But Funk has quit. It re
mains only to be satd for him that he
conducted a real ladylike campaign,
almost as noiseless and Inoffensive as
that of Judge Parker in 1904. He did
not accuse other candidates of being
Influenced by Wall street He main
tained no press bureau and made no
effort to exploit his abilities as a ball
player, swimmer or long-distance ora
tor. He simply catalogued his modest
virtues aa proof that he would make
an ideal candidate for his party and
waited for the call. It did not come
and he has withdrawn from the race.
Perhaps It Is better so, but a lot of
folks will be sorry that Funk flunked.
HEW KNQLAXO FAHM DBCADESCE.
Discussing the decadence of New
England agriculture, a writer in the
Boston Transcript suggests that one
cause, seldom If ever mentioned, which
Is at the root of the whole matter, is
to be found In the transfer of farm
capital from east to west. Developing
thla Idea, he Bays:
.There la little capital for , agriculture. It
waa all eent weat. New England agricul
ture dledthat weatern-agrlculture might
live, killed itself by furnishing the capital
to make. the latter auccesaful. New. Eng
land likes to send Its money away from
home. That la a humun trait, but It has Its
highest development here. Think of the
millions It has sunk ln sun-baked lands In
Kanaas, in gullible squanderings ln every
western state. Why, Its abandoned farms
are better security thsn many of the duet
clouda It lent money upon. Ita money that
has made huge orchards in the Oxark,
would have made thtfn In the Green moun
tains. Its aid to shotgun farmers with one
mule and a plan for reforming the cur
rr.cy out . there on the great American
desert would have made Us own farmers
amount to something. And this money was
in general lent by farmera, taken out of
the careful, painstaking agriculture here to
finance wild schemes In Nebraska. These
dregs lent those progressive men money to
put into reapers and traction engines that
would lie out In the snow all winter, that
would sometimes be actually lost in the
wilderness of weeds that grew up about
them and tho owner think them stolen.
But the best-blooded didn't care. They
borrowed more money from eastern Jays
and have ever alnce hated them for lending
Even where the money was wisely and
honestly used, nonetheless was It Capital
gone out of New England agriculture.
While it Is possible that "this sena-
ing-away disease" is still rampant in
New England, it is.hardly reasonable
to assert that the restoration of New
England agriculture la to be brought
about merely by ceasing communlca
tlon with the west. The abuses here
referred to, doubtless prevailed fifteen
and twenty years ago, although even
then in by no means so flagrant a form
as one would be led to believe, but
they have been almost wholly abolished
for the last ten years. . Some eastern
capital Is still coming west to finance
agricultural developments, but most of
the agricultural improvements ln this
section are being worked out with
western capital. '
If eastern capital 1b Btlll coming, it
for the reason that it will draw
safer and larger returns out of a Ne
braska farm covered with black loam
four to bIx feet deep than it will out
of a moss-covered quarry with arable
soil only In the crevices. Had the Pll
grima had as easy access to the trans
mlsslsslppl country as they had to the
shores of Massachusetts they would
never have landed on Plymouth Rock.
No one ever heard of a New England
farmer settling In the west and going
back again. ' ThOBe who want to ex
plain the decadence of New England
agriculture will not have to look below
the surface. '
A CODE or LEGAL CTHCS.
Many high-minded members of the
legal profession, smarting under the
disrepute brought upon It by practi
tioners who have employed most ques
tionable methods, while yet managing
to keep out of prison and Insld; the
bars of their states, have started a
movement for a general code of ethics
which shall guide and. if possible,
govern the practice ' throughout the
country. A committee appointed by
the American Bar association has pre
pared such a code and will submit for
the consideration of the association at
the next annual convention, to be held
at Seattle In August.
Summed un. the recommendations
of the committee ln relation to the new
code are: Known criminals may be
properly defended; counsel may ex
haust the law In their defense; wit
nesses are to bo treated with respect;
lawyers may publish professional
cards; solicitation Is most unprofes
slonal; Instigators of litigation arc to
be discountenanced; employment of
agents Is to be condemned.
The fact that such a code is pro
posed for adoption Is proof of Its need.
a fact which laymen and litigants have
long known. At each meeting of tbe
bar association for some years learned
members have deplored the deteriora
tion of the bar In the lowering of its
standard of ethics and the commercial
spirit that seems to have taken posses
slon of it. The "ambulance chasers,'
the provokers of libel suits, the jury
fixers and the lawyer's agents devoted
to subordination of perjury by spend
ing money on witnesses have done their
disgraceful work and brought the en
tire profession into public criticism
and censure from which it is now pro
posed to seek permanent relief. An
extract from the proposed code gives
a hint of the new standard proposed
to be raised:
It la unprofessional for a lawyer to vol
unteer advlca to bring a law ault, except
ln rare cases where ties of blood relation
ship or trust make It his duty to do so.
.Not only Is stirring up strife and litigation
unprofessional, but It la disreputable
In
morals, contrary to public policy and In
dietabte aK common law. No one should
I
be permitted to remain In the profession
who hunts up defects In titles or other
causes of action and Informs thereof In
order to be employed to bring suit, or who
breeds litigation by seeking out those with
clalma for personal Injuries or those hav
ing any other grounde of action In order
to secure them aa clients; or who employ
agents or runners for like purpo; OT
who peya or rewarda directly or Indirectly
thoee. who bring or Influence the bringing
of auch cases to his office; or who re
munerates policemen, court or prison offi
cials, physicians. hospltt attaches or oth
ers who may succeed, under the guise of
giving disinterested frlendlyedvlce. In In
fluencing the criminal, theslck and the
Injured, the Ignorant or others to seek his
professional servlcea.
The responsibility for advising question
able transactions, for bringing questionable
suits, for urging questionable defenses. Is
the lawyer's responsibility. He cannot es
cape It by urging as an excuse that he Is
only following his client's Instructions.
The proposed code emphasizes the
duty of the lawyer to uphold and ob
serve the law, which, the -fram-era of
the code assert, Is greater than any
client and more powerful than any In
terest. Thlsris a direct thrust at the
class of attorneys who are popularly
believed to be employed by large in
terests for the sole purpose of invent
ing evasions of the law.
It is not probable that the adoption
of the code will meet any strong oppo
sition at the convention. It will be
decidedly Interesting, however, to see
what methods the American Bar asso
ciation will take to secure the enforce
ment of the code after it is adopted.
By use of this code aa the basis for
disbarment proceedings the profession
might quickly rid itself of unworthy
members. It Is greatly to be desired
that the code, when adopted, will have
the proper Influence on the conduct of
the members of the legal profession.
COZQCKST OF JHE AIR.
Popular incredulity of man's ability
to conquer the ajr and make the flying
machine a -safe and practical means of
conveyance through the air cannot long
withstand the almost dally reports of
more or less successful experiments ln
aviation. Great impetus has been
given to the work of Inventors by the
action of the governments of this and
other countries in making conditional
contracts for the use of the perfected
machines for military purposes. By
the very nature of these contracts most
of the experiments are being conducted
with all possible secrecy and only
meager details have become public,
but these have Ijeen sufficient to spur
popular interest. The Wright brothers
in North Carolina, Henri Farnam in
Paris, Delagrange at Rome, Hargrave
in Australia and other aeronauts have
fully demonstrated the dlrlglbllltv of
the flying machines and have driven
them ln circles, with winds and against
strong currents, arlelnff and alighting
at will and apparently great prpgress
is being made tbward the perfection of
these air vehicles.
Greatest diversity is observed In the
?orm of the craft designed for naviga
tion of the air. The butterfly, the sea
gull and other birds have been used
as models for the construction of the
machines and, effort Is now being di
rected to secure stability and steadi
ness during flight and some means of
preventing "diving," which as every
school boy knows, follows when the
wind suddenly Increases In force. An
airship with a habit of rolling over and
over under changes of wind velocity is
not a particularly desirable vehicle
for conveyance and the great problem
in aviation is now to devise means for
maintaining the necessary equilibrium
in variable air currents and strong
breezes. According to the New York
Herald, the Wright brothers have
solved this problem by the use of
'wlnge," which stand out horizontally
from either side of the machine and
can be tackM, taken in or extended,
as occasion demands, just as the wings
of a bird are used to control and direct
its flight.
The net result of the experiments to
date has been the demonstration that
a machine heavier than the surround
ing atmosphere can be made to sustain
Itself and its operator in the air, pro
pelled ln a direction opposite to that
of the wind and steered and maneu
vered with considerable precision
This would appear to have at least
established the principle of the achieve
iuejii oi uuman nigm. Aiucti more
play must be given to Inventive talent
before the heavler-than-alr machine
becomes a positive instrumentality ln
aviation, but the progress already made
Is a promise of greater achievements
and ultimate trlumpl(. .
PhAKS TOR WORLD PEACE
The popular demonstration of wel
come to President Fallierea of France
by tbe British public has given rise to
much gossip throughout Europe of a
new alliance between France and Eng
land, with perhaps a readjustment of
relations among the powers that would
make for universal peace. It Is even
Intimated that England, France and
Russia are planning a new triple alii
ance, although it is difficult to deter
mine any basis for such an agreement.
It is evident that the English and
French are nearer to a resumption
the cordial relations that made them
colleagues at the council board of
Europe than they have been ln many
years. V hen M. Loubet was president
of France his visits to London gave
the first impetus to' this cementing of
closer relations between the two coun
tries, but it Is Btlll premature to talk
of a new offensive and defensive alii
ance between the countries. France
K would welcome such an alliance, un
doubtedly, aa It is always In more or
less dread of what Germany may do,
but England's policy for years has
been against continental alliances.
Furthermore, England has no army
for operations on the continent and 1b
using every effort to prevent the need
of one. England wants reace. An
alliance with France would not secure
It, but might, on the other hand, tend
to provoke war by arousing the hos
tility of Germany. England wants the
friendship of France and Germany
and Russia, but can not secure It by
making an alliance which would leave
out either of those nations.
King Edward has announced his in
tention to pay a visit to the car of
Russia, and that will give occasion for
more discussion concerning the ru
mored new alliance, but in the end it
will probably be found that England la
simply planning to' strengthen its cor
dial relations with France and Russia,
but will hesitate at any specific agree
ment that might arouse the enmity of
Germany. However, the facts all show
that the world la marching steadily
toward a better understanding be
tween nations, with the goal of uni
versal peace almost in sight. The na
tions are coming closer together- and
adopting more enlightened methods of
settling disputes. Each agreement not
to let friction occur, or not to let it
become Irritating to the point of con
flict, paves the way for final disarma
ment and the end of wars.
Davenport bas a cartoon in the New
York Mall, anent the resumption of
work In the New England mills, ln
which the east 1b represented as waiv
ing a handkerchief and shouting to the
west, "We're all right." The west Is
n position to respond, "Glad to hear
It; we've been all right all the time."
The New England mills have started
work with full forces, giving employ
ment to 35,000 persons who have been
out of work, or( upon short time, for
several months. Every action of this
kind removes the prospect of any call
for tho emergency Currency authorized
by congress.
It is not believed that New YorK
will take kindly to the proposition that
Ellhu Root be sent to the United
States senate to succeed T. C. Piatt.
New York has not yet acquired the
habit of Bending high-grade men to
the United Stares senate.
"If women were in the senate and
one of them should talk for eighteen
hours, what would happen?" asks the
Lowell Courier. 'Well, the next one
would simply go after the record, Just
as the men ln the senate do.
1
Absent Treatment.
Springfield Republican.
"Christian Science money" is what
financial circles are beginning to call the
panic or emergency currency provided for
in' the Aldrlch-Vreeland act. May it ever
be a case of, absent treatment!
Who ia Hunting for Wart
St. Louis Republic. 1
There Is nothing startling ln General J.
Franklin Bell's opinion that' the army
ust now Is not ln the best possible shape
for war. We are not hunting, for war.
and nobody la yearning for trouble
with us. i
Where Are Tbryf
Pittsburg Dispatch.
The American Bar association commit
tee points out the evil of political judges.
But It does not specify ln what courts
the political judges are to be found, home
f its members may still desire to prac
tice In some of thoje courts.
Military Glory Blighted by Boera.
Philadelphia Press.
General Bulrer'a career was a striking
proof of the fact that a soldier's defects
are more lasting In their effect than their
Ictorles. The Victoria cross and tho
triumphs of his early military life were
all forgotten after the black day at
Colenso and the subsequent disasters ad
ministered by the stubborn. Boers.
Waste of Time- and Labor.
Chicago Tribune.
Those new words that have been writ
ten to fit the tune of ' Dixie" represent a
total waste of time and labbr on tlic part
of the author, as might have been ex
pected. Nobody wants them. Docs any
body auppose that a new versio'n ' of
'Home, Sweet Home" ever could supplant
the commonplace but Immortal song
known by that name?
Epaii&lon of Trade and Banking.
San Francisco Chronicle.
Between 1887 and 1907 the business of
the country as shown by the bank clear
ings Increased from $52,126, 704, 4s0 to
$164, 662,615, 268. Deposits ln banking In-
stltutlons Increased from t4,tH.HO,750 dur
ing the same period to 12, 948,503,123. It
a the contemplation of this vast expan
fcion of trade and -banking buslnoss, and
the relatively small sums loat through
defalcation or bad management wnlch in
c lines men to believe that the world Is
not growing worse,, aa some pessimists
would have us believe It la.
PERSONAL AND OTHERWISE.
What la rarer than a dry day ln June?
Every ahower la Just right for a bumper
crop. .
Tempting business Inducements are held
out to dealera to prolong their stay In Chi
cago during the week of June 16.
With the coming or the good, old sum.
mertlme Chicago hopes to affect a saving
by burning the waters of Bubbly creek.
A shameful sample of oppression li re
ported In a Lxmg Island, town where a pas
tor waa forced to accept an advance ln his
aalary against his protests.
It U proposed to substitute a skull and
crossbones for the eagle on bottles of Rua
slan vodka, thus- making the label accur
ately picture the contents.
The former hermit Lama of Tibet a now
scorching around China In an automobile,
au evidently aeterminea to amasn me speea
Or record of the Ahkoond of Swat.
A Scotland Yard detective la not such
fearsome person when he strays from
home. . A few Coney Island con men
plucked .one of the' tribe for $-00.
Notwithstanding the decision of the court
some people not quite so wise will note
symptoms of sanity ln Harry Thaw'a hint
to credltora, "If I am crasy, I am not re
eponsible for my debts."
The latest attack on the Japa In Ban
Francisco la made by a profeaaor who ac
cuses them of being descendants of an ex
tlnct race of hairy people. If thla doea not
bring the Japanese fleet tbe case Is hope
less.
A Michigan university professor scores
on his Chicago brethren by announclnj
that Timbuktoo will be the world's cap
ital 4.000 years hence. By putting his guess
well Into the future, scoffers are ewatud
Into a comatose copdltton.
JS June VVeddino 7W
Graduation -
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FOR THE GIRL GRADUATE
Fine Diamond Ring, Chattelain Watch.
FOR THE BOY GRADUATE
A fine, thin model, "Watch, in gold and gold filled. We
have them from $15.00 up. - v
WEDDING PRESENTS
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Also make a specialty in fitting your eyes by a grad
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Visit our establishment before purchasing elsewhere.
MANDELBERG'S GIFT SHOP
1522 FARNAM STREET, OMAHA, NEBRASKA.
8EHMON8 BOILED DOWN,
Service Is the simple path to salntllncss.
He is always generous who haa left his
purse at home.
He alwaya appears orthodox who hits
our neighbors hard.
Taking the church aa a fad does not
make the life of faith. .
It is, the bowed heart that heaven sees
rather than the bent knee.
Frlendahlpa never are the better for being
punctured and then patched up.
You may dodge the courts, but you can
not dodge the law of consequences.
It is alwaya easier, and often safer, to
preach on old saints than on modern
ln ncrs.
We may not determine our circum
stances, but we do determine our vital
environment.
Many a man has been cured of any de
sire to join the heavenly choJr by hearing
the earthly ones.3-Chieago Tribune.'' ' ;
SECULAR SHOTS AT THE) PCLPIT
Baltimore American: Presbyterian union!
Methodist unlonl But why don't they
unite? v , " .
Washington' Post:1 VA London clergyman
says he composes his sermons while shav
ing in the morning. No doubt he elimi
nates the thoughts that come to him occa
sionally when he cuts himself.
Kansas City Times: The - Methodists
have decided to change the time-honored
title "presiding elder" to "district super
intendent," and It Is feared someone will
now try to change the name of the Amen
corner to the "sphere of acquiescence.
Springfield Republican: To many a life'
long Methodist brother the action of tho
general conference of his church In doing
away with .the. title of "presiding elder"
and substituting therefor "district super
intendent" will seem nothing short of sac
rilege. Would It have been possible for
the long line of pious men who have borne
the old designation to seem so good and
true and remote from worldllness under
the title of "district superintendent," a
thing that smacks of material things and
has no warrant for reverence? So tnVs old
order changeth, whether the old-tlmera like
It or noU-
Mlnneapolls Journal: The laying of the
cornerstone of the Roman Catholic proca
thedral Sunday was a notable event ln
church history In the nflrthwest. It was
also a personal triumph of a large kind
for Archbishop Ireland. Through a long
lifo of uatrulncss Archbishop Ireland hti
been steadily American In his habit of
thought. He has been trusted to interpret
the opinion of Catholic America on more
than one occasion. His later years have
been rendered pleasant by many , honors,
but probably none has given hlm( greater
pleasure than the loyalty of hla people In
building two great cathedrals. oe ln Bt.
Paul, the other In Minneapolis. Each
promises to be a triumph of church archi
tecture. Each is a monument to the Cath
olic leader who haa labored assiduously
for his people.
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APOLLO PLAYER PIANO?
t in i ,u J . ... J.JL'1 pTT
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the world. When you buy the Apollo Player Piano, the ability
t0 The VrUoWpiayer Piano costs from $500 to f 1,008. It Is
sold either for cash or on moderate monthly payments. If you
already own a piano, that Instrument will be taken la part
PaSureniy there Is no reason why you should not own this
splendid source of amusement, recreation and education, if you
rCILet '"send you the full descriptive matter of the Apollo
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A. HOSPE CO. ata Poufl,a" su
Branch Houses; Lincoln, Neb.; Kearney, Xeb.j Council Bluffs, Iowa,
.....
DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES.
Teas The engagement broken, you say?
Why, ho used to think her worth her
weight ln gold.
Jess Yea, but all that'a changed. It
wasn't long before he discovered that she
was merely worth her weight In gold min
ing atock. Philadelphia Press.
"What do you charge for
treatment? I want to get
wrinkles."
i course of
rid of my
"Only $3(10"
"Mercy! Do you think I'm the sort of
woman to get rid of wrinkles by caus
ing my husband a lot more?" Philadelphia
Ledger.
"My wife," growled Kadley, "Is the most
forgetful woman."
Indeed?' queried the friend, politely,
'Yes; she can never remember In
the
mornic where I left my pipe the night
before." Philadelphia Press.
"Bridget's act was certainly . character
istic of tho humor of her nation."
"What was it?"
"She told me she got a dream of a dress
to wear to a wake." Baltimore American.
"How did you happen to propoae to her?"
I took her to a base bail game and
she didn't distract me with, a single-question.'
Houston Post. '(.,'
"I used to know that man when he was
a struggling lawyer. What business doea
he follow now?" - . ,
"Skimming cream."
"Skimming cream? Is he In the dairy
business?"
"Dairy nothing! He'a receiver for a bank
rupt truat company." Chicago Tribune.
"He ha three daughters. One married
a French cauffeur "
"Au! Quite original."
"The second married an Indian, a
descendant of a chelftatn "
"I see! Quite original."
"But the third married a plain American
business man."
"H'm! Merely eccentric, I should say."
Puck. v
COXSTANCY.
' Ella Wheeler Wilcox.
I will be true.. Mad stars forsake their
courses,
And, led by reckless meteors, turn away
From paths appointed by Eternal Korcrs;
But my fixed heart shall never go astray.
Like those calm worlds whose sun-directed
motion
Is undisturbed by strife of wind or sea.
So shall my swerveless serone devotion
Sweep on forever, loyal unto thee.
I will be true. The fickle tide, divided
Between two wooing shores. In wild un
rest May to and fro shift always undecided;
Not so the tide of passion ln my breast,
With the grand surge of some resistless
river.
That hurries on, past mountain, vale and
sea.
V'nio ilia main, lta waters io deliver.
So my full heart keeps all its wealth for
thee.
I will he true, Light barquea may be be
lated, ' Or turned aside by every breese at play,
While sturdy ships, well manned and richly
freighted.
With fair sails flying, anchor safe ln bay
Like some firm rock that, steadfast and
unshaken,
Standn all unmoved when ebbing billows
flee.
So would my heart stand, faithful If for
saken I would be true though thou were falsa
to me,
It is the one that
plays all the notes on
the piano 88 keys that
transposes music in dif
ferent keys, and that
plays all musio rolls,
even those made for
players.