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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (March 6, 1908)
"4 THE OMAHA DAILY BEE: FRIDAY, MARCIT C, 1909. Tite Omaha Daily Bee: FOUNDED BY EDWAHD RUSBWATET. Victor roseVatcii, editor. Entered at Omaha I'optofflce second class mattttr. TERMS OP BUBSCRirTlON: ralljr lieo (without Sunday), oni year. .14.00 ViUv lfee ana Kunday, oi.e year 6 uO Ctundar Hop, on; your t 60 fcaiurJay Bne, one year. l.W DELIVERED lit CARRIER: Pally U (including Sunday), per week. 13c iJalljr Hce (without Simuavj. per Weea.lUc Evenln Uee (without tiunduy), per wefk So Kvenlng Bee (with Sunday). per week UK! Adrireas all complaint ut irregularities la delivery to Cltv Circulation Department. ' OFFICE: Omaha The H Building. South Omaha City HhII HolMlng. Council Ulutfa 16 Scott Ptrert. Chlc-ago 1640 UnlverHlty Building. N-w York liog llome Life Insurance Uulldlng. WMhlngtnn-7?S Fourteenth Street N. W. 1 CORRESPONDENCE. Communications relating to newa and edi torial matter should be addreaaed, Omaha Bee,' Editorial Department. REMITTANCES. Remit by draft, express or postal order payable to The Beu Publishing company. Only 2-cont ittmpt received In payment of mall account!. Pergonal checks, except on Omaha or eastern exchanges, not accepted. STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION. .. .ftate of Nebraska, Douglas Coutny, s.: George H. Trarhurk, treasurer of The Hen I'ubllshlng cnmpniy. being duly sworn, 'says that the nctual number of full and complete copies of The Dally, Mornlnn, Evening and Punday Res printed during the mouth of February, 1908, was as fol low; . 1 36,760 J.. 35,300 I , 38,180 .., 38,320 6 36,310 38,030 7.. 8B,40 8 30.O3Q 3S.0O0 10 36.800 21..... 38,100 12 36,300 II 36,300 34.... 36,100 15. 36,110 16 35,100 17 36,200 18..... 36,930 19 36.73Q 20 36,300 21 38,340 22 36,630 23...... 36,600 24.. 38,300 25 38,670 2 , 88,490 27.. 38,660 ti 38,380 29...., 36,360 Totals ....1,048,850 tss unsold and returned copies. 8,43? Net total M 1,039,113 tal)y average. 36,831 UEORQE B. TZSCHUCK. ' . ) . Treasurer, subscribed n my presence and sworn to before me this d day of March, 190g. ROBERT HUNTER ' Notay Public. WHEN OUT OF TOWB.' Subscribers leaving the city tem porarily should bar Ths Be mailed to them. Address will be changed as oftem mm requested. It is to be noted that a democratic convention Is not a waterways conven tion. "What shall we do with the Black Hand?" asks the Philadelphia Press. Amputate It. The weather bureau has furnished some figures on the "mean tempera ture" tor February. ' It was. Don't grumble about the weather. March is the nature fakir of the calen dar and has to live up to Its reputa tion. John Burroughs ' refers to an ac cused nature fakir as "an unconscious inventor." That is Bostonesie for a I "short and uglier word." The railroads deny that they ire working against Mr. Bryan. They are not even going to close the tele graph office at Falrview. Dorothy Russell has Just married a Japanese merchant prince. Dorothy Is already on the second lap In the race to tie her mother's record. "Kings are a necessity," says the Fall Mall Gazette. Perhaps, but they are sometimes mighty expensive when, the other fellow holds aces. Frank A. Ilunaey Is tackling a big Job if he attempts to improve the character of the Baltimore News, .which he has just purchased. The San Francisco Call has an arti cle about "The Cannon Boom in Peru." Just now the Cannon boom is most rampant In Peru and Egypt (111.). , Money must be more plentiful than most folks imagine, if any predatory combination is throwing It away In an effort to beat Mr. Bryan at Denver. "The democrats should stop kicking nd come into camp," says Champ Clark. When a democrat stops kick ing he ceases to be much of a demo crat. i '. . "Persons born under Aries," says an astrologer, "always think before tspeaklng." It is too bad that so few of our politicians were born under lAries. t --L "Laws are needed in Kentucky," (.ays Editor Watterson. While that proposition may be open to discussion, there Is no Question of the need of law enforcement. United States Senator Bradley of Kentucky is called "Billy O." by his friends. The democrats of Kentucky are calling him names that do not bound at all like that. I do not hear any considerable Dahlman talk out in the state," says State Senator "Jim" Brady of Boone connty. Mayor "Jim" may have to swap hja lariat for a megaphone. Fifty-sU divorces have beun granted In one week in a Tennessee county. If Tennessee has any respect for the doctrine of states' rights It will quit encroaching on South Dakota's pre serves. ,; Two Incipient' democratic governors occupying quarters la the Omaha city hall at one and tha sume time threaten to overtax the capacity of that hot house of political ambitions.' Lucky that both ax not located pa the same floor k ' " ' rut rinsT roru. The first four Taft delegates to rep resent Nebraska In the Chicago con ventlon have been chosen and the re maining places in the delegation will be filled up within the coming week. The selection of Senator Burkett as one of the delegates for the First dis trict instead of the candidate who had been allowed to name tbe delegation from Lancaster county, which is also Senator Burkett's home county, re flects simply a determination on the part of the rank and file of tbe repub licans there to send men to Chicago who are really for Taft and can be de pended upon to put forth their best efforts to bring about his nomination. Everybody knows that the presidential preference vote In Lancaster county, and the subsequent refusal of its con vention to endorse Taft even for Boc-1 ond choice was founded simply on po litical trickery. The factions there fought out a great sham battle, the real purpose being to slap Senator Burkett in the face, and after they thought they had accomplished this object they divided the spoils by let ting one side take the delegation to the state convention and the other side the delegation to the congressional convention. By commissioning Burk ett as its delegate the First district convention has removed the bone .of contention as - a possible disturbing factor In the coming state convention. It must be gratifying to republicans generally throughout Nebraska, who have already shown their overwhelm ing preference for Mr. Taft as the suc cessor ot Mr. Roosevelt, to have both the First and the Fourth districts adopt resolutions of unqualified ap proval of the Roosevelt policies to be continued under Mr. Taft, and to se lect their most representative repub licans as delegates to carry the mes sage to Chicago. , MAKING 1UUXDEB EASY1. Howard Maxim, who has Just In vented a noiseless firearm, is panic- stricken. He declares that he realizes the awful possibilities of this gun and that his conscience Is far from easy. "When you can discharge a bullet," says he, "with practically the same velocity and accuracy as with the old gun, and do it silently, It is evident that you have a very dangerous pos sibility." Mr. Maxim fears that his invention will be taken advantage of first by those who have no right to it, to be used with perfect adaptability in the art of private assassination. He wants congress to control the inven tion and allow its use only by the mili tary and police authorities'. Unquestionably, Mr. Maxim's In vention may add a certain refinement to the art of taking life. The burglar and strongarm men have been slow to resort to the use ot pistols because of the noise they make. .With a gun that will do Its work effectively and without noise, the greatest obstacle to successful crime and secret as sassination will have been removed, and the perils which crime brings upon honest folks greatly Increased. But there Is a silver lining to the cloud. If the Maxim invention is as dangerous as he would have us believe, It will serve to hasten legislation regu lating the sale and use of firearms. Lawmakers of the government and of the states will have to take cognizance of the new danger and its possibilities for evil and adopt stringent measures against carrying concealed weapons. It will be accepted as a great Instru ment for good it it results in labeling the man who carries a pistol, In a peaceable community, as a public menace and subject to the attention of the police. THE OHIO REPVBL1CAN PLATF0RM. The platform declarations of the republicans of Ohio may be accepted as outlining the platform of the party that will ba adopted at the national convention if Mr. Taft is the nominee for the presidency and to that extent are of national significance. The declaration reflects Mr. Taft's well known views and position, not enly upon the great problems that have been solved or placed In the way of satisfactory solution under the ad ministration of President Roosevelt, but also upon questions on which Mr. Taft has taken advanced ground with out reference to the achievements of the present administration. On the question of tariff revision, which has not been made prominent in the present administration, owing to the necessity ot prompt action on more urgent matters, the Ohio repub licans take, no uncertain ground. They declare for: A revision of the tariff by a special ses sion of the next congress, insuring the maintenance of the true principle of pro tection by Imposing such custom duties as will equal the difference between the cost ot production at home and abroad, together with a reasonable profit, to the end that, without excessive duties, American manu facturers, farmers, producers and wage art.ers may have adequate protection. This position Is in full accord with the best thought of the public without regard to partisan relations. It calls for a consideration of the tariff ques tion at a special session, probably to be culled soon after March 4. 1909, when the schedules may be revised and the question settled without the injec tion of other legislative questions and without allowing considerations ot partisan advantage to Influence action. It gives the public a plain promise of action, at a specified time and in a specified manner, and cannot tall to please and satisfy the advocates of tariff revision as distinguished fronv the advocates of tariff destruction. Denouncing the methods employed southern states to disfranchise . the negro, tha Ohio platform proposes a' remedy designed to put brakes on the abuse. It favors a reduction of rep resentatlon in congress and the elec toral college in those states where negroeg are disfranchised on account of their color. The adoption ot this plan, urged by Mr. Taft in several ot his public addresses, would put an end to conditions which enable a state like Oeorgla, for instance, to send eleven members to congress chosen by a smaller vote than Is cast in a single congressional district in some northern state 8. On the issues that have been brought forward by the present re publican administration. Including rail way regulation, prosecution of unlaw ful trusts, the employers' liability law, restriction of the use of injunction, Impartial enforcement of the laws, im provement ot the Inland waterways, currency reform and other legislation for the benefit of the entire country, the Ohio republicans stand squarely behind President Roosevelt, declaring that, "we endorse his splendid ad ministration and declare that neither halt nor retreat shall be sounded in the march toward better government." Altogether, the Ohio platform makes a very acceptable model for the party's national platform. s LOOK TO TBE SCHOOL BVILDiyOS. The awful disaster in which more than 160 innocent children have been burned to death by a fire in a school building near Cleveland admonishes the authorities everywhere to look to the school buildings. This holocaust, which In loss of life is almost on a par with the recent theater cremation in Pennsylvania. points an accusing finger at our civili zation, which entrusts boys and girls to such flretraps. The rule ought to be laid down and adhered to firmly that not another school, building, pub lic or private, should be constructed except out of strictly fireproof mate rials. In the meantime, of course, we will have to put up with the school build ings at hand, but they, too, should have the fire risk In them minimized by every possible precaution regard less of expense. Ample exits and metal or' stone stairways should be In sisted upon even In old buildings, and the possibility of locked doors, or doors opening Inward only, absolutely removed by taking the locks off alto gether, if necessary, and putting every door on a double swinging hinge. It such a fatal fire as that which has JuBt occurred near Cleveland should happen in Omaha we would demand a grand Jury indictment ot every school district officer who shared in the responsibility for the condition of the school building. PROPOSED TBEASURT CBASQES. In the general movement in prog ress at Washington for a revision and rejuvenation of the methods of con ducting the public business an effort is being made to change the manner of effecting disbursements by the treas ury to public creditors and also of col lecting dues from public debtors. Since the foundation of the govern ment the Treasury department has operated on a strictly cash basis, and moneys once paid into the treasury have been paid out only by treasury warrant or by authority of specific ap propriations. It is now proposed to authorize the secretary to pay hout money in certified checks on banks and to accept from debtors such cer tified checks. It Is argued that this plan would greatly facilitate public business and would save much expense and delay now involved in the trans portation and exchange ot actual money. This plan la employed by our states and municipali ties, whose officials check against the revenues deposited with the fiscal agents of the municipalities. Changes in existing laws will have to be made before the proposed re forms can be effected. Custom duties must now be paid in actual gold coin, or its equivalent, and deposited direct with the BubtreasurieB or the Treasury department at Washington. Treas urers and subtreasurers are under heavy bonds to protect the funds in their charge and any attempted change of methods, without a change In law, might operate to relense the sub treasurers from liability. The col lectors of customs are also under bonds, making them responsible for their collections in actual money. The existing law does not apply to collec tions of internal revenues and these might be transferred by certified checks or such other method as the Treasury department officials may de termine. Cumbersome and unwieldy as the existing system may.be, any attempt to change it would involve a com plete revolution of the subtreasury system and a radical change In the operation of the Treasury department at Washington. It is doubtful If pub lic sentiment would submit to the sud den uprooting of a system in vogue since the establishment of the govern ment and in which the people have Implicit confidence. Those proposing the change, therefore, will probably have to go slow and feel their way. Colonel Bryan says it Is a disgrace that a republican senator should be elected from Kentucky with the help ot democratic votes. Would it have been as much of a disgrace if it had been the other way, so that a demo cratic senator Ehould be elected by re publican votes? One of the nominees In tbe South Omaha primary on the face of the re turns la entitled to a place on the re-' publican ticket by a majority of two votes, and the defeated aspirant Insists on a recount The law entitles him to a recount for cause, bnt it is worth noting that tbe nomination would not be In such great demand unless It was the consensus of opinion that chances ot republican success In the coming city election were more than encour King. The incorporation of the musicians of Omaha Into an association "for mu tual protection" may not be a labor union, bub It will. In all probability, supplant the union .formerly main tained by the musicians. It will be in teresting to watch the success of this incorporated body and to see whether any of the other local trades unions will follow suit The only democratic congressman from Nebraska, discussing the tariff on wood pulp, quoted In corroboration from a statement by the business man ager of the New York World. How any professed Bryan democrat could draw on the New York World for cor roborative evidence passes compre hension. In the death of George P. Marvin ot Beatrice another of the pioneer edi tors of Nebraska has been called, who in his own way and In his own field exerted a strong Influence. The place occupied by Editor Marvin in Ne braska Journalism was unique and will not be filled by another. Mr. Bryan expresses his displeasure at the election of a republican senator from Kentucky. He is apparently be ginning to realize the fact that his at tempt to dictate to the democratic party in Kentucky has only Intensified the feud of the factions there. It Mr. Bryan learned of a conspiracy to defeat him at Denver "from a man who overheard a telephone conversa tion on the subject," Senator Foraker must have got the information that he was a presidential candidate from some Bonrce like that The World-Herald feels like taking off its hat to the Bryan Volunteers of Ne braska. World-Herald. That Is not exactly what 1b wanted. The test consists of dropping $10 In the hat which is being passed around by the Bryan Volunteers. The crowd brought out to wltnesa the arrival In Omaha of the first ot the New York, to Paris auto cars explains why the circuses have been unable to do away with their street parades. A free show la a great drawing card. By renewal of work in the copper smelters at Butte 20,000 men have resumed employment after several months of idleness. A smoking fac tory chimney Is the surest evidence of returning confidence. Teat of at Prophecy. Boston Transcript. According to Prophet Schlatter, Secretary Taft will win the presidency. Still, the usual formalities will probably be observed. Universal Agltatloa. Baltimore American. Prof. Perclval Lowell, the eminent as tronomer, announces they have found water on Mars. Gracious 1 Have they got a local option fight up there, tool Ingratitude. Detroit , Free Press. An Ohio man has been sent to Jail for stealing a phonograph. This shows the Ingratitude of the other flat dwellers, who should have come forward and paid hla fine. Doings In Dogdays. St. Louis Globe-Democrat. By putting off their fusion until August Bryan and Hearst can keep the democratic party quiet until after the Denver conven tion. After that the party will be helpless and the two radical rippers safe from Inter ference In their joint plana. Under Individual Ownership. Cincinnati Commercial Tribune The Omaha World-Herald Is badly mis taken in calling It "the "party of Jefferson, Jackson and Bryan." The gentleman from Nebraska has wholly reformed the party corporation by freeilng out the two old gentlemen who laid Its foundations. He la now sole proprietor. Lid (or the Lawless. Detroit Free Press. The lid which It is most essential should be put down Is a lid on murderous an archy. And If It requires a lid as broad as the territory of the entire United States and as weighty as the condemnation which public sentiment visits on deeds like the one In Denver to hold It down, such a lid should be provided. Happened Years A(o, Too. St. Louts Globe-Dwmocrat. An official of the navy says the Ameri can fleet at the battle of Santiago made "the most disgraceful exhibition of gun nery that ever took place on the face of the globe," because the hits averaged only VH per cent of the shots fired. As this sufficed to destroy all the Spanish ships In the course of a few hours the Job looks workmanlike to the ordinary observer. The American people were contented with the result and the Spanish more than satis fied. Lnwa Needed In Kentacky. Louisville Courier Journal. There's a warm discussion In Washington as to whether cats should be taxed. New Tork newspapers are debating with vigor and heat the question of whether a man should wear a frock coat or evening clothes to make a Sabbath, evening call. In Iowa there Is a movement among spinsters to tax bachelors Into a state of bankruptcy or matrimony. In Iceland there Is a law against kissing. When the general as sembly of Kentucky gets through with Its meaaures t tax dogs, abolish the "pin hook" tobacco buyer, and guard the help less citizen of Kentucky from the tempta tion to buy a drink of whisky at a licensed bar. It might be well to take up the cat tax question, to legislate as to the wearing of the top hat and the "two-tall" coat, to pass a drastic measure prohibitive of bachelorhood, making the county a unit, and to make It a misdemeanor or a felcony for a love-sick swain and a moon-sick maid to bill and coo beneath the harvest moon. The consideration of these matters might fill In time until March 18, and the matter of stamping out anarchy could go ever until tbe session of 1810. RtetGRMBTT COTnACT9. Comment on Bishop Meannell's Letter to Ills fHoceaan Flock. Washington Star. Stimulated, perhaps, by the "affinity talk In which society indulged a short time ago, sober-minded people are beginning to take thought of the question of marriage as a serious proposition and are trying to see their way to a solution of the problem of mlematlng. It Is a difficult undertaking. The question Is so distinctly a personal one that no broad rules can be laid down. The following dispatch from Omaha explains the terms of a now rule of the Catholic church. Just promulgated, which Is to go Into effect after Easter, not merely In the diocese of northern Nebraska, but through out the world: Bishop Richard Scannell of the Cathollo diocese or northern Nebraska made a for mal ruling for his dloceoe today that all marslHge engagements must be marie In writing, witnessed by two persons, before priests wtll be permitted to nerform a mar. rlage ceremony. He declares that engage ments nave come to be looked upon so lightly that this ruling Is necnesary. This Is a return, tn a manner, to the old process of calling the banns. There are many people today who deplore the passing of the ancient custom of the public crying of the names of those who Intend to Join in matrimony. There was undoubtedly a certain formalism about the proclamation or banns that Invested the engagement with solemnity. "Courting" was no light some process, no merely frivolous course of calls. It "was a serious business. When a young man "walked out" with a girl he was assuming a certain responsibility. When he "set up" with hnr his responsi bility deepened. And courting waa suffi ciently protracted to enable both the man and the woman to know something about the other's character. It was not a matter of meeting at a dance, with a few calls. bouquets and boxes of candy, a theater party or so and then an engagement ring, followed quickly by a marriage ceremony. and possibly In a few months or years by a divorce. There was significance In the Injunction: "What God hath Joined to gether let no man put asunder." Possibly If witnesses must sign the en gagement agreement, to be produced be fore a priest will perform the marriage ceremony, there will be fewer hasty coup lings and still fewer divorces. The experi ment Is worth trying. The real divorce problem goes back to the question of haste In marriage and that In turn goes back to the evil of haste In engagements. Per haps the Omaha bishop has touched the center of the trouble. WATERWAYS. President's Message In Line wttk tks Sentiment ot the People. Philadelphia Record. The country la fully awake to the Impor tance of the general and systematic Im provement of our waterways. The presi dent s message transmitting the report of the Waterways commission, an unofficial rganisatlon, will be received with keen Interest and hearty approval. It Is high time the country ceased to deal with the problem piecemeal and through several separated branches of the government, and determined 6n a plan of action to be per sistently and consistently adhered to. The problem is vast- It can never be completed, for It will unfold as we go along, and much of the work will be ex pensive. We have 25,000 miles of navigable rivers and as much more that can be made navigable, and we have canals, and along the coast we have channels some of which need improvement and all of which need to be connected In order to make them thoroughly useful. The taak Is not simply one of naviga tion. It Includes the use of rivers for Ir rigation and for the developement of power and their use as sources of water supply must be kept constantly In mind. The railroads have diverted trafflo from the rivers by making special rates where their competition was felt. They have acquired canals to prevent their developement and general use. Water power companies have dammed streams without providing means of navigation around their obstructions, and cities and towns all over the country have been emptying their sewers In the streams from which other towns must draw their supplies of water. Much has been done for the Improvement of naviga tion by national appropriations, but not tn a systematic way. The states are grad ually awakening to the sanitary aspects of the matter. The time has come for national direction of waterway uses and Improvements whefe more than one state la affected. The most valuable regulator of railroad rates Is water transportation, and the railways can be left mostly to thomsolves If the fluid highways are opened and kept open to all who would uso them. PEHSONAL POINTERS. Dr. Paul Blumenthal, a Judge of Ham. burg, Germany, la In Boston for the pur pose of studying the probation system. William Rockhlll, American minister to China, with Mrs. Rockhlll and suite. have sailed from Seattle for Peking on the Minnesota- Lord and Lady Bateman, the latter of whom recently made a brief visit to the United States, have gone from London to the Riviera. Mrs. Egan, the wife of the American min ister to Denmark, presented her two daugh ters at the first court ball of the year at Copenhagen Saturday night. Ex-Senator Chandler of New Hampshire, wno has been In public life for almost fifty years, has kept a series of diaries covering that entire period and has set down much of the secret political history of the country. Drs. M. L. Brttton and Holllck of the New York Botanical gardens are at King ston, Jamaica, on a botanical expedition. They will mako an exploration of the Island In conjunction with the director of the Kingston public gardens. Rev. John A. Earl Invites babies espe cially t the Bclden Avcnuo Baptist church, Chicago, and has made every provision for their comfort, even to providing aurs Ing bottles and the like to keep them quiet while their mothers are listening to the sermon. The other day a San Francisco bank depositor asked for his meney, and waa chased Into the street by the president of the Institution, who waa armed with a gun. Little Incidents like this always make New Yorkers more content with their own lot, hard as It may be, W. W. Rockhlll, American minister to China, will visit the viceroy of Nankin and llankou, China, In April aboard an Ameri can man-of-war, which will be escorted by one or more American warships. The Journey Involves the navigation of the Yangtsc river a distance of some L&OO miles. A member of congress recently scored Washington for not coming to the front when dissolution with England was first suggested and since then some senators havo expressed the opinion that his fare well address Is out of date. The won der Is that he was ever elected president at all. Right Hon. Herbert Henry Aaqulth, slated to succeed Sir Henry Campbell Bannerman as premier of Great. Britain, la one of the very few membera of the pres ent cabinet who are not Scotch, but he Is a Yorkshlreman and represents a Scotch constituency, and his belter half Is Scotch, bulnc tLe daughter of Sir Charley Tcncant j TUB PAMOri CRiniRO C1.TO. Voleoe Serial Organisation of Wnh In at on Newspaper Oni lespondenta. About three times a year a telegraphic dispatch In the Sunday newspaper tells that the Gridiron club has had another dinner and gives some notice of what tool! place. But these synoptlo dispatches can not oonvey any adequate notion of tho "at moephore" of the dinnerof Its guests, of the settings, of the quick wit and ready humor that flashes around the tables. Ar- inur wauace iinn takes a page In a re cent number of Leslie's Weekly to convey a suggestion of what happens at one of these functions: Gridiron dinners are not banquets; for that matter, tho term din ner Is a misnomer, and the more proper designation would be to call It an enter tainment where the dinner la a side Issue, though nonetheless pleasing, because a man gets the best of food and drink while njoylng the sparkling wit and humor of the Gridiron club. The dinner la served, but It 1s made a secondary consideration to the feast of good things which brilliant men can provide, men who have reduced dinner entertainment to a science. It Is the aim and Intention of the Grid Iron club to have fun with the men of af fairs who think that they exude states manship and business aoumen whenever they a,eak or appear In public No man Is too weighty In the state or In business to escape the shafts of gridiron wit. And what may seem remarkable tho victims oome again and again to enjoy the grid Iron dinners. That Is because there Is no venom In tho wit, no vitriol In the satire, no Intentional hurt in anything said or done. Tho latest annual dinner la a fair Illus tration of what a gridiron dinner means. IU guests comprised the president of tho United States, several membera of hla cab inet, the vice president, the speaker of the house of representatives, oenatora. repre sentatives, ambassadors and ministers from foreign countries, army and navy officers. a bishop of the Episcopal church, William J. Bryan, Judge George Gray, Jut son Har mon and other men prominently mentioned In connection with the nomination for president, editors and writers of periodicals and prominent papers, business men of subatanoe and world-wide reputation, nro. feaetonal men altogether a galaxy of prom inent people that could not bo assembled at any other place In tho world. And what Is more, the Gridiron club Is tho only or ganisation that could bring together any such assemblage. Tho club not only brings uoh a distinguished body of men to It tables, but It entertains them for four houra. The entertainment begins before the guests are seated and continues be tween courses until tho midnight hour. There are good songs at the Gridiron duh. What makes them especially taking Is that xney are adapted to the occasion. Usually they are directed at a guest who is called upon to speak, and generally some very pertinent queries are made to fit a popu lar air and addressed to the nrnmlnnnt man. At the latest dinner, Secretary Root, Judge Gray, President Roosevelt, and Mr. Bryan were Introduced In this way. The Roosevelt song waa about Roosevelt's 'smile, smile, smile." Mr. Bryan, who was certainly put on the gridiron, was pointedly asked what he would do if he were defeated three times and would he make It "four." giving the Nebraskan a text for ten m'n- utes of exquisite humor. Gridiron speeches are not serious by de sign. It Is not the Intention of the club to have serious matters injected into Its en tertainment, although It always pays a tri bute to Its membera who have caasad tn fthe beyond Curing the year. This feature occupies only a few minutes, when the room Is darkened, the pictures ot the late members are thrown upon a screen, a few words are spoken and the pictures fado away, the lights blase forth with a burst of song, and the merriment Is resumed. The tempatlon of orators to make serious speeches Is often too great to resist. The man afforded the opportunity to talk some times cannot resist the Impulse to "drive home great truths." In former years such a man met with severe gibes and pointed Interruption That was all right for an average senator or member of the house, but it Is not considered appropriate thus to Interrupt presidents, vice-presidents, and ambassadors. Fortunately for the club. only a few serious speeches are made, and It Is not often that the seriousness Is of extended duration. A gridiron speaker. If he desires to make a hit, will not endeavor to Inculcate great truths; he will not men 84 Nutriment ' i Beans are Nature's choicest food. Better than meat cheaper by far You don't eat enoueh of fhetn, because beans cooked at home are not cooked rightly. And cooking takes too long. Beans, to be digestible, must be factory cooked. It requires a fierce heat to break down their fibre, and you can't apply it. That's why your beans are heavy. Ours are baked 90 minutes at 245 degrees. Let us cook for you. We are experts on beans, and we have the facilities Ours is the accumulated knowledge of 47 years applied . to baked beans and tomato sauce. No wonder we know. We bake in live steam. That is why our beans are all baked alike without bursting. They are nutty, yet mealy. And we bake the beans, the tomato sauce and the pork all together, and secure a delicious blend. Van Gimp's pork and beans baked with tomato sauce Then we get better beans than you get. And we pay seven times what some beans cost to get them. We use only the whitest, the plumpest, the fullest-grown. Our sauce is made from vine-ripened tomatoes. It costs us just five times what some sauce is sold for. But to that 6auce is due Van Camp's superlative test. You eat beans once a week now, maybe. You'll eat them daily when ou know1 You will eat them because of their food value. Because they are appetiring delicious. What else do you know that compares with them i You will serve them because they are convenient. A dozen cans in the house means a dozen meals always ready. But be sure to get Van Camp's. Other brands are uot like them. 10, IS and 20? per can. Van Camp Packing Company, Indianapolis, Ind. tion the power of ths press; he will riot try to Instruct the correspondents In whnt they should do; he will avoid an expression of his views upon the great questions of ths day, but tell a few good stories, and stop before the crowds around the tables are weary. It requires experience, a high ordr of talent, or careful coaching to produce Just the right kind of gridiron orator. The club which gives these unique din ners was organlied twenty-three years ago and Is composed of forty news paper correspondents, representing the leading newspapers of the country. A number of Its membera have retired from active newspaper work, and some of them are now holding Important positions under the federal government. There are. In addition, a limited Hst of men who are especially equipped to help tho newspaper men In their entertainments. But the dinners depend on the work of the members, who know and writs about publlo men and events. These are ths men who bars made tho Gridiron club unique. At the same time, the club hag stood for ths best there la In Washington Journalism and has raised the standard of ths profoaslon In the national capital. MIRTHFUL MOMENTS. Son flooklns uoV I want te use a word In this letter which Is synonymous" Mother (breaking In) Don't do It, my boy. Have the lotter real dignified and perfectly proper. Baltimore American. "Her deecendants boast that aha came over In the Mayflower." "Pooh! A little old tub of a aalllnS vessel that had a hard tlmo to do the trip In two momnsi i runs, or me posterity that Is going to boast that their ancestor came over tn the Lusltnnla, and In four days'" Browning's Magaalne. P nort Ins Customer A rmufut of iIimu please. Ti-ooei urvrgnnsola or Cheddar T Sporting Customer Oh. I A nn't ear I fltart 'em both across the counter and I'll take tho winner. Illustrated Bits. "Pa, wat Is a phUosopherT" "A philosopher. Tommv la a man hn doesn't worry anv about financial strln. gencles, because he never has any money." Somerville Journal. Critic Now that your nlav Is to actually produced, you can surely give me some Idea as to tho plot and general action. Playwright It's sftll too Indefinite. Ynu see, the callboy and the man at the stage door haven't told me yet what they want done to It I Modern Society. "John, do you love meT" "Yea." "How much do you love meT" "Say SfiO worth. Maria. Mnnov la tirui Just now." Louisville Courier-Journal. "Is she popular?" "Oh, very."" "Whafa the secret 1" "Can't afford tn Olitdreaa anvhnHu Nashville American. 'John. I met a woman tndnv I hadn't seen tor five years." uia sne Know your' "Yes; she recognised me by my hat." Then the etlonce heoamn nmiis,.lv. Kansas City Journal. Mrs. Goodklnd So VOU Are an ennineor and can't get a Job In this town! Well, why don't you go to some other place? Tettereden Tome I can't, madam; you see I'm a stationary onKlneei. Woman'a Home Companion. The Mttn And you reallv think you have an Ideal husband, don't you? The Matron I know I have. Why, he treata me aa If he wero a candidate for office and I waa a voter. Chicago News. OPINION OK Pl'lfKIN HOLLOW. a K. Kiser in the Reoord-Herald. There's always something goln' on to make the cowards quake with dread And set around and talk about the dangers that are on ahead; 111 bet you that when Caesar fell the folks who kept the stores in Rome Expected that the mobs would rise to drive them out of house and home; But things kept goln" right : along, the Qld ' world never swerving a Jot, And in a little while the crowus went back io worain ana forgot. When Cromwell got his dander up went to knockln' thing about, 1 11 bet that lots of folks supposed world waa soin' tin tha ami tho fnu- i . . J . r : ' . no rauicwi, i a pose, were I recklessly destrovin' tradn blamed for And probably wild howls went up for all the changes that were made; But England didn't go to smash; In fact the rlp-up helped a Int. And In a little while the crowds went back to workln' and forgot. It's always been the same old cry; we hear It every now and then: Some man that ain't afiald steps out and doea things for his fellow men. And they throw up their hands and say, because his way Is strange or new, That he has knocked the bottom out and things will soon be fallln' through, But gener'ly It happens that what necila . upsettln' gets iiDsnt. And when the crowds get back to work the wnoie ariair is soon forgot.