THE OMAHA SUNDAY liEE: FEBRUARY J3, 1003.
TlIE Omaiia Sundax Ber
FOUNDED BY EDWARD RBBWATEfl.
VICTOH ROSKWATEH, EDITOR.
Entered at Omaha pottofflc aa aecond
class matter.
terms or surmmirTioN:
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REMITTANCES.
Remit by draft, express or postal order
payable to Tha Bee Publishing company.
Only J-cent at am pa received in payment of
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STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION. .
State of Nebraska, Douglas County, as.:
Ueorge B. Tsschuck, treasurer of The
Bee Publishing company, being duly sworn
aaa that tha actual number of 'till and
complete coplea of The Dally, Mornlnn.
Evening and Sunday Bee printed during
the month of January, 1906, waa as fol
lows;
1 ,800
i w.iao
11,..,; M.300
II..., S6.1B0
II 3S.400
gO 36.850
II..,.. 36,410
12 36,140
II H,M0
14 86,460
It , 86,540
l 88,100
17 86,140
3 37,180
II 36,060
10 36,830
11 36,980
1 86,320
4 36,400
16,300
36,340
1 S,600
3,a90
M3N
10 S6.4U0
11 36,330
U U.1M
II 88.4J0
14 BtMieo
It 36,360
II M00
Totals 1,183,890
Less unsold and returned coplea.
8,400
Net tout 1,114440
Daily average. 85,963
GEORQE B. TZ8CHUCK.
Treasurer.
Subscribed In my presence and sworn to
before me this 1st day of February. 1908.
ROBERT HUNTER,
' Notary Public.
WIIEJf OUT OF TOWS.
Sabecrlbera leaving; tha city tem
porarily ahoald have Tha Bra
sailed to theaa. Addreaa will be
champed as often aa requested.
Admiral Evans and bla
again in the Lima light.
men are
Mr. Bryan says the weakness of the
democratic party la not a lack of prin
ciples. No, It's a lack of rotes.
Secretary Taft made a speech In
Concord In favor of tariff revislt.ii.
Speaker Cannon was not In Concord.
The Pullman company has decided
to Quit selling the fetuff they called
whisky on their dining and buffet cars.
It remains to be seen whether Mayor
"Jim" will shine aa much In hunting
the bears aa be does In roping the bulls.
The people of the United States con
tributed $7,600,000 to foreign missions
last year and spent $11,000,000 for
chewing gum.
A professor in the University of Chi
cago declares that Chicago leads the
world In vulgarity. Chicago Is wel
come to the distinction.
An Iowa man who has a job paying
$60 a month Is plotting to make him
self king of Servia. Some men do not
know when they are well off.
Let us hope that there is no truth In
the report that Harry Thaw and his
wife are to be divorced. They ought
to be compelled to live together.
It Is a little difficult to understand
why so many men are out of employ
ment when all the presidential aspi
rants are looking for male help.
The jury lu the Snell cbbo could not
agree on the question of his insanity,
although the twelve men are unani
mous In the opinion that he was a fool.
Mrs. Cornelius Vanderbllt wants It
understood that she Is not going to
become engaged to Count Hadik or any
other man through a correspondence
school.
That Ohio teacher who tacked a
toy's tongue to a chair because he lied
to ber must bave wanted to furnish a
new story for the old headline, "An
other Lie Nailed."
"It does not matter bow much you
talk when fishing," says Forest and
Stream. It would be nice if men
would talk more while fishing and less
(after they get home.,
The San Francisco Board of Health
wants all the rats In that city killed
before the fleet enters the harbor. It
la not believed that Admiral Evans'
men are afraid of rats.
An elephant on a Jersey Central
train pulled the bell cord, got out at
a station and drove a lot of passen
gers out of the depot.- The circus
season will open earlier than usual this
year.
Colonel Bryan says he hopes the
party at Denver will give him an honest
platform. If it Is any other kind of a
platform none but Colonel Bryan will
be to blame for It. The party will ac
cept any platform be writes for It.
Former Senator Burton of Kansas
Saks tbst all other aspirants leave the
track clear for a fight at the primaries
between him and J. L. Brlstow. Bur
ton Is growing modest. In the old
days be would have asked Brlstow to
get out of the way and leave the field
aUar for J. It. Burton,'
THAT ''FKKLiyO OF ANTAOOHtfM"
The curious confusion of mind that
seems to have come over the average
railroad man dlscu.Rf.lng the relations
of the railroads with the people crops
out In peculiar fashion in the address
recently delivered at Fort Worth by
B. F. Yoakum, who is chairman of the
executive committee of the Rock Inland
system. After picturing in glowing
terms the possibilities of Texas when
Its great natural resources, now stag
nated by "hostile legislation," shall
have been more fully developed, Mr.
Voakum declares:
The railroad managers of the country
ptoday are aa much against Improper meth
ods (of corporate management) aa any
other cltlEcns of our country, and they
stand willing and ready to co-operate In
bringing around a condition between the
people and the transportation companies
that wil work to the mutual advantage of
both, with a view of giving fair treatment
to the people and receiving fair treatment
from the people; and I would love to have
It go out to the world that Texan was the
first to set the example that unjust exist
ing laws be modified and that future laws
enacted, If any, should be enacted after the
most careful consideration In behalf of
both the people and the railroads, and that
In the future Texas' attitude wou'.d te con
structive and not destructive.
In another Dlace Mr. Yoakum ex
plains:
The political theory that the public serv
ice corporations and the public that they
serve must continue a feeling of antag
onism Instead of close co-operation la a
false one and the great mass of thinking
people are beginning to realise It and they
will aon co-operate through methods that
are fair to both; and our public officers
will be men who realise the Importance of
closer co-operation with these Institutions;
and the people and the railroad managers
will do all In their power to bring around
that friendly feeling that should exist
rather than to pursue tho course that a
great many have pursued for the last few
years, which attitude Is costing the coun
try and the public untold benefits.
Inasmuch as Mr. Yoakum does not
enumerate the specific laws enacted
by Texas to which he objects as unfair
and unjust, no one unfamiliar with
them can say whether the railroads
have any real grievance in Texas. Yet
where he denounces in one breath the
course "that a great many have pur
sued for the last few years," In Insist
ing upon fairer treatment by the rail
roads, was demanded by existing con
ditions and by the defiant attitude of
the corporation managers, in another
breath he, himself, practically admits,
when he throws thia bouquet at his
own feet:
I can say that I am on record as far
back as eight years as strongly favoring
a system for control of railroads under
such rules and regulations as would prop
erly protect the public from abuses, In
justice and extortion, and equally as strong
in favor of the abolition of all special priv
ileges or discriminations against any class
of shippers In favtjr of another.
By making himself an exception, Mr.
Yoakum concedes that the railroads, aa
a whole, were opposed to railroad reg
ulation of any kind and in favor of
continuing the old abuses and special
privileges and discriminations, which
were not abolished until fear of punish
ment stopped them.
Instead of Inveighing against all the
restrictive legislation that has been
put upon the statute books and seeking
to evade these laws wherever pos
sible, the railroad managers would
strengthen their position immeasurably
If they would take the initiative at co
operation and do their best to carry
out the spirit and intent of this legisla
tion. Some of them are trying to do
this very thing, at least here In Ne
braska, but they are finding it hard to
adapt themselves to the new order of
things. But works count more than
words, and if the railroads for whose
managements Mr. Yoakum speaks
would protest less and co-operate more
the "foeliug of antagonism" about
which they complain would soon disap
pear. THIRD PARTY DREAMS.
Former Commissioner of Labor Car
roll D. Wright, now president of Clark
university, and tie Washington Post
should call a convention at once and
prepare to take charge of the political
affairs of the country through a third
party which, they have jointly discov
ered. Is in existence, powerful enough
to decide elections and control the des
tinies of the nation, but lacking only In
direction and leadership. Dr. Wright
and the PoBt do not agree fully as to
the character of the voters who com
pose the third party. Dr. Wright con
tends that the men belonging to it are
thoughtful, earnest, public-spirited per
sons who "seek no office, own no ban
ners, hold no meetings, but silently
decide the elections." The Post Is ap
parently convinced that this third
party is in the main made up of the
men who voted for Palmer and Buck
ner in 1896 and have since held aloof
from active participation in party af
fairs. Di Wright places the numer
ical Btrength of thU third party at "at
least one million voteig." The Post,
more optimistic, is certain that there
were at least 2,000,000 Palmer and
Buckner men in 1896 and that there
should be 4,000,000 of them now.
The existence of a growing army of
Independent voters In the country Is
generally recognized. With the ad
justment of issues on which party lines
were sharply drawn, like the gold
standard, there has beep more liberal
thinking and freer acting among vot
ers and each year the number of men
who silently vote without reference to
partisan hurrahs grows larger, but
there is nothing to sustain the Post's
contention that this great third party
could be urganUed and voted aa a unit.
The Post argues that if the Palmer and
Buckner forces had been kept together
they would now number at le
4,000,000 and would be In position to
control the democratic party or to de
cide the election after the canlldates
bad been named.
Tns difficulty with such claims is
that third parties do not flourish In
this country. 8cores of them bave
arisen, but invariably failed to displace
the existing organizations. The popu
list party came nearest to establishing
a permanent Identity. It cast moVe
than 1.000,000 votes in 1892, but it
could not hold them and its efforts at
elections are now designated as "scat
tering." The Palmer-Butkner organ
isation, if it had possessed any real
power, would have captured the demo
cratic organization by 1900, but It flx
r.led and died long before that. The
republican and democratic parties will
continue to command the support of
the great masses of voters, and while
both may be influenced by, and make
concessions to, the "silent" vote, there
Is scant prospect of any third party
supplanting either for years to come.
THE RlASOX IT HI'.
By tha way, Mr. Bee, why can't we have
a law making ex-presidents of the United
States life members of the senate?
Oothenburg, Neb. W. J. B.
The real reason Is because the con
stitution of the United States defines
how the senate shall be made up, and
says that the senate "shall be com
posed of two senators from each state,
chosen by the legislature thereof for
six years; and each senator shall have
one vote." In Addition to this the
constitution provides that although it
may be amended according to the
methods prescribed, "no state without
its consent shall be deprived of Its
equal suffrage In the senate.
This means that ex-presldents could
not be made life members of the sen
ate with the same powers as other
members of the senate even by con
stitutional amendment, unless by the
uanlmous consent of every state In the
union, because, otherwise, each ex
president, given membership by virtue
of that fact", residing in some state
would give that state an additional
vote and thus destroy the equality of
the states in the senate. Ex-presldents
might, perhaps, be made honor
ary members of the senate with life
membership and a right to participate
in debate and suggest measures, but
they could not be vested with voting
membership that would entitle them to
wield an Influence In national legisla
tion except by mere sufferance.
FIFTY THOUSAND A YEAR.
The very well springs of human sym
pathy threaten to be drained by the
plight of one Thomas, a former high
financier, who is telling his troubles to
a referee In bankruptcy in New York
City.- The poor fellow, caught in a
financial pinch recently, is now suffer
ing the humiliation of being faced in
court by some heartless creditors who
want to collect several million dollars
from him. He has frankly told the
court that his money is tied up In trust
funds, on which the income is only
$150,000 a year and that It will take
at least $60,000 of that annually for
his living expenses. The creditors
think he should be able to scrimp along
on $15,000 a year and have asked the
court to make an order to that effect.
The great financier rejects the propo
sition with mingled scorn and tears and
declares that he cannot live In New
York as a gentleman on a cent less
than $50,000 a. year.
After all, it depends upon the view
point. The particular bankrupt in
question belonged to the smart set. He
owned racing horses, summer homes,
was a patron of the opera, changed
automobiles every hour, kept a yacht
at each fashionable seashore resort and
denied himself nothing money could
buy and, when his money ran short, be
had no hesitancy in going Into debt to
the rude tradesmen now trying to col
lect their just dues. Most of these
tradesmen doubtless live on less than
one-tenth of the amount be is asking
for his yearly expenses, but then, of
course they are mere barbarians, who
have a necessary place In the arrange
ment of the world and cannot be ex
pected to appreciate the suffering their
whilom best customer would undergo
If his allowance were reduced to less
than $50,000 year. A sympathetic
public will hone that the court will
give Thomas all that is coming to him.
TH VICE PRESIDENCY.
Governor Guild of Massachusetts,
who has been urged by some of his
political friends and admirers to seek
the nomination for second place on the
republican ticket, wisely declines to
make any canvass for that honor, ex
plaining that under our system of se
lecting presidential standard bearers no
man can be a candidate for the vice
presidential nomination. He holds
that until the nominating convention
has Elgrlfied its choice for president
it is Impossible to determine with any
reasonable certainty the availability of
a given candidate for second place.
The history of party conventions for
the last half century supports Gover
nor Guild's view of the case. In the
republican party, Henry Wilson of
Massachusetts is perhaps the only vice
presidential candidate who was ever
named as the result of a special can
vass in his behalf. He was nominated
with Grant, In 1872. as a concession
to the eastern republicans, bis candi
dacy having been announced early In
the campaign and his claims urged for
geographical reasons. Whatever the
original design may have been, candi
dates for vice president, in both par
ties, have usually been chosen on ac
count of their availability In healing
ante-convention Bores or in adding
avctlonal or factional strength to the
ticket.
It has become a generally accepted
rule to avoid too close geographical
proximity. The wishes of the nominee
for president are also an Important fac
tor. Andrew Jackson, for Instance,
practically forced the nomination of
Van Buren for vice president, chiefly
because he liked him. Tyler was nom
inated for vice president as a sop to
the Clay supporters after Clay's defeat.
Dallas was named for vice president to
save the tariff in Pennsylvania. The
nomination of Breckenridge was a con
cession to the slavery wing of the dem
ocratic party. . Hamlin was chosen to
satisfy the conservatives of the republi
can party and Andrew Johnson because
Mr. Lincoln wanted a war democrat to
run with him. Wheeler, Arthur,
Hendricks, Morton, Stevenson, Hobart,
Itoosevelt and Fairbanks were all
picked for second place because of
availability considerations. None of
them was an avowed candidate for the
honor.
There is no prospect of any depar
ture from these precedents in the com
ing conventions. The nomination of
Mr. Bryan will call for a vice presi
dential candidate from the south or
east. If Mr. Taft is nominated at Chi
cago, the vice presidency will doubt
less be offred to Governor Hughes of
New York. If he accepts, there will be
no controversy over the second place.
Should he decline, the field will be
open for Guild of Massachusetts, Fort
of New Jersey and others who have
geographical location, fitness and avail
ability to bo urged In their behalf.
TEACHER? TRAIMNO IN NEBRASKA.
The action of the Board of Regents
of the University of Nebraska looking
toward the establishment of a normal
training department marks a step for
ward in the development of that in
stitution. The object of the new de
partment will be, as we understand It,
to give graduates of the university
special instruction designed to fit them
to become teachers of higher educa
tion. Such a teachers' training school, If
properly conducted, need not come in
conflict with the normal training
schools already maintained by the
state, except possib'.y to furnish a cap
stone occasionally for normal school
graduates who may want to specialize
along particular lines. To make the
new department successful, howeveT, It
will have to be kept strictly within
these limits by insisting upon a much
higher standard of preparation for ad
mission, as well as setting much more
Bevere tests for graduation. The uni
versity has the facilities, the labora
tories, the libraries and the faculty to
supply this special training for higher
grade teachers, and it is unfortunate
that they have not been fully utilized
previously.
So far as The Bee Is concerned, It
would have preferred to have seen the
establishment of a normal school In
connection with the university rather
than the multiplication of normal
schools throughout the state, and made
the suggestion to the legislature at the
time the last new normal school was
provided for. There Is no probability
that any of the normal schools will be
abolished, but with the two already
established, a teachers' training school
at the university and the numerous
junior normals for temporary Instruc
tion of teachers, Nebraska ought to be
reasonably supplied for many years
with facilities for training the teachers
needed for its public school system
from the kindergarten to the top of the
high school.
WAR ON THE RAT.
The rat, generally classed among
the greatest enemies of man in all the
animal kingdom, finds its lot unhappler
than usual now that the sanitarians
and physicians are on its trail. In San
Francisco a fund of $500,000 has been
raised to exterminate the rat, scientists
having demonstrated beyond doubt
that the rodent is responsible for the
spread of the bubonic plague and
other Infectious diseases. City offi
cials, merchants and business men
generally have enlisted In the warfare
and a bonus Is to be paid for the scalp
of every dead rat delivered to the
proper authorities.
Impetus to this new crusade against
the rat has been furnished fom two
sources. The Department of Agricul
ture reports that rats cause an annual
loss of at least $60,000,000 to the
American farmers by the destruction
of grain, both in the fields and In the
granaries. Scientists have completed
the counts of the indictment by prov
ing that the rat, in addition to being a
robber and a thief, is a great dissemi
nator of disease. It is demonstrated
that the ordinary brown rat is the pri
mary host of the germ of trichina,
which is communicated to consumers
of pork through pigs that have eaten
tricblnosed rats. The gray rat, the
species that fattens under sidewalks
and sewers of great cities, is a con
victed carrier of bubonic plague germs.
In India last year more than 2,000,000
persons died of the plague. In dis
tricts which succeeded In exterminating
the rat the plague has disappeared and
the government there is making a sys
tematic warfare upon this animal. The
Danish government is perfecting the
machinery for a ruthless crusade that
is to end only with the utter extirpa
tion of the enemy. It is proposed to
secure world-wide co-operation in na
tional campaigns against this inveter
ate enemy of mankind. '
On purely economic grounds, the
extermination of the rat would appear
to be worth while. Zuscblag, the
great Copenhagen engineer, who has
made a study of the subject, declares
that there are as many rata In every
country as there are human beings, and
that each rat works damage to the ex
tent of half a cent a day. On that
basis, the rats Inhabiting the United
States cost us $146,000,000 a year for
will contend
Colonel Bryan's Commoner prints a
model constitution and by-laws for a
democratic club, modestly taking the
Jacksonville Bryan club for its Ideal.
The club, after bring named after Mr.
Bryan, is to be subdivided Into;
An executive committee.
A finance committee.
A membership committee.
A headauarters committed
A speakers' committee.
A marching club committee.
A music and decoration committee.
A transportation committee.
A banquet committee.
A registration and polling committee.
A press committee.
One may well Imagine that it will
keep the membership committee busy
recruiting democrats enough to fill the
places on the, other committees.
Govtrnor Sheldon's speech before
the convention of Cass county republi
cans should be repeated or read at
every republican county convention in
Nebraska. The governor has put the
situation of Nebraska republicans, with
reference to endorslns the politics of
President Roosevelt by Bending a Taft
delegation to Chicago, In language at
once terse and convincing.
The Omaha plan of planting the vacant
lots In alfalfa seems too good to be monopo
Used by the metropolis. Lincoln Journat.
This is an extraordinary concession
to come out of Lincoln. It admits, In
the first place, that Omaha is a metrop
olis and, in the second place, that
Omaha may have something good
enough to borrow. Verily, the era of
brotherly love rapidly approacheth.
General Stoessel, found guilty of
cowardice for the surrender of Port
Arthur, demands that all tho blame
be placed on him, as he assumed all
responsibility for the surrender In or
der to save the lives of 20,000 ex
hausted soldiers. No cowardice In
that.
The New York World has now added
Tom Johnson of Cleveland to its list
of democratic presidential availables.
The World is evidently In favor of any
democrat except the only one who can
be nominated at Denver.
Pride Seta th Pare.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
We are a great people, because we make
such a hullabaloo about the things we do;
because we accomplish them to tho music
of the band. Our pride has art the pace,
and It's our pride that keeps us up till we
drop.
Hoyal nouet for American Women.
Baltimore American!
The emperor of Germany Is said to have
referred to the wife of the American am
bassador, Mrs. Tower, as "the most bril
liant social leader of my ralgn" and to
have conferred upon her the unofficial title
of the "Von Moltke of society." This Is
another triumph to add to the many
achieved by American women abroad; they
have the habit of shining In whatever posi
tions they may be placed.
Divorces Only (or Childless.
Alexander Graham Bell In Leslie's.
Throw wide the gates of marriage, and
where children are produced closo tight the
doors of divorce. Every child Is entitled,
by nature, to a father and a mother, and
no people should produce children who are
not prepared to give them parertul care for
life. The grand spectacle Is presented to
our eyes of a new people being gradually
evolved In the United States by the ming
ling together of the different races of the
world In varying proportions. It Is of the
greatest consequence to us that tho final
result should be the evolution of a higher
and nobler typo of man In America, and
not deterioration of the nation. To this
end the process of evolution should be
carefully studied and then controlled by
suitable Immigration laws tending to elimi
nate undesirable ethnical elements and to
stimulate the admission of elements assimi
lated readily by our population and that
tend to raise the standard of manhood here.
A MOOHL 1IANKKH.
Rumple Commended to Finan
An
ciers of Today.
New York Tribune.
One hundred and thirteen years ago, Feb
ruary 18, there was born at Danvers, Mass.,
a boy who grew up to be a clerk, a mer
chant, a banker and a philanthropist.
"High finance" waa unknown to Ulin, but
he made by legitimate operations a fortuno
of about $12,00(1,000. His Integrity waa so
unquestioned that his personal endorsement
was sufficient to Induce European bankets
to purchase American state bonds which
otherwise they would not have touched. He
was so devoid of sordldness that after thus
selling for a state $8,0u0,Xl0 worth of bonds
he declined to accept the fc00,000 which was
his lawful commission. He gave away
about $7,000,000 In the wisest and most be
neficent charities of the age. He declined
a baronetcy which the queen of England
offered to him, but during hla lifetime a
statue of him was unveiled In Iondon by
the present king of England, and when he
died his funeral was held In Westminster
Abbey and his body was sent home on the
finest ship of the British navy. His bank
ing house was never In the hands of a re
ceiver, his business methods were never
the subject of Judicial Inquest and not even
the extretnest purist ever described a tent
of George Peabody's wealth aa "tainted."
l'EIISOXAL AM) OTIIKHWISE.
The man who reported thn first robin
cooled his heels In the snow drifts.
A snow storm valued at JlO.Oon.Om) looms
large as an advance agent of prosperity.
In spite of all advance notices, genuine
signs of spring are visible only In shop
windows.
The disposition of congress to restore "In
God We Trust" to the coins, will give
numismatists another hot run for molaase
money.
'Tia an III wind that blows nobody good.
Vital statistics show that South Dakota
realized $i.UO.'W from Its divorce mills In
the last decade.
Blgns of pronerlty multiply In spots.
Baltimore undertakers advertise bargain
prices for funerals, and Boone (la.) Jus
tices tic nuptial knots free. Business Is
looking up and down In both plaeea.
A Cleveland poet who waa unable to
break Into the magazines, regaled his wife
with his choicest ditty, "What Would You
Take to Go, 11a';" Ma took the hint and
asked thd court to fix the amount of the
alimony.
Justice unadorned was handed to three
boys adjudged guilty of fracturing the
Juvenile law at Kvansvllle, Ind. Three
fathers did the shingling In a manner In
dicating experience and due regard for the
reauonalUIUtlea of tha Job,
their keep, and no one
that they are worth it. '.
Brcad is the
because it contains all the properties necessary to
the nourishment of the human system, and they
are better distributed than in any other food.
"Butter Nut" Bread
is baked by the best and most sanitary methods
extant.
At Your Grocer's 5c. - ' r'
England Bakery J
$'yZuV LEAVENWORTH ST. f
EYES EXAMINED FREE
We make no charge for Eye Examlnat ton by tha X.aUst Bolentlflo Instruments.
Our prices are as low as la connlstant with high grade Bptctacles and Eye Olaasea.
H. J. Penfold & Co.
Leading Opticians 1400 Farnam Street
BKItMOXS IIOILED DOWN,
It's not the misery but the motive makes
the martyr.
The worn out religion is the one that is
never used.
There can be no right manners without
right motives.
You can never wholly satisfy heart hunger
through the eara alone.
We are seldom sorry for the stinging
words we have left unsaid.
A man misses the blessing In a difficulty
when he crawls around It.
Nothing pleases cne kind of sinner better
than pounding the other kind.
The people who are not afraid to die are
the onea the world wants to live.
Advertising the sins of our friends Is not
the same thing as confessing our own.
The church Is sure to be left In the dark
when the preacher Is only n gas fixture.
1'tght-hyarted peopli! are almost aure to be
found carrying somebody else's burden.
Everyday exasperations are windows
through which w& see the real man within.
To shut your eyes to the needs and griefs
of others Is to shut out the world's tide of
Joy.
You cannot quicken the appetite of men
for righteousness by preaching on rotten
ness. The only sympathy some folks cultivate
Is a keen feeling of being sorry for them
selves. Chicago Tribune. '
DOMESTIC PLEASANTRIES.
"What Is she mad at me forT
"It's your fault that she's an old maid.
"My fault?"
"VeB, you never proposed. Houston
Post-
"It was a quiet wedding, wasn't It?"
"Not as quiet as weddings generally
are. The groom spoke the responses so
you could hear him distinctly." Chtoatfo
Tribune.
"Isn't It' strange that foreign counts
never see anything attractive about poor
American girls?"
"No more strange than the ract that
counts with money don't see anything at
tractive In any kind of American girls.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
"Light the gas, quick, Jim.
"1 can't; I haven't a match.'
Cun t you srark up a little,
then?"
Louisville Courier-Journal.
"Yes." said she. defiantly,
"I admit that
I kissed him." . , ,
"Did he put up much of a struggle?
Inquired her best girl friend. Houston
Post.
"I want some collars for my liunband,"
said a woman In a department .Uie, tdut
I am afraid I have forgotten the size.
"Thirteen and a half, ma'am?' suggeatcd
the clerk. ...
"That's It. How on earth did you
"Gentlemen who let their wives buy
their collars for 'em are almost alwaya
about that size, ma'am." exclaimed the
observant cK-rk.-Everybody s Magazine.
"It was rather hard to loe your daugh
ter, ch?" remarked the guest uftcr Me
.W"Oh.nno." replied the bride', futher. "It
THE KIMBALL PIANO IS ITS
OWN BEST ADVERTISEMENT
Every man who haa a hand In mak
ing it understands this' thoroughly.
The writer went through the Klm
bull factory not long ago.
"How long have you been working
here?" he asUed a gray-headed man.
"Oh, over twenty years," was the
answer. "And you?" to another. "All
my life," he replied. And so It went.
It's the life work of these people
the makins of the Kimball piauo, and
they not only work aa well aa they
know how, but they know-how to work
well.
Today there are probably more Kim
ball Pianos In Omaha than there are
t any other one make of piano.
A.. HOSPE
1818 DOUGLAS hTKEKT.
JULLNCU HOUSES! Liucolu, Keb. Kearney, Nvl. Council Bluffs, Iowa.
Staff of Life"
i .
did seem hard at one time, but Mary
finally landed this fellow Just as we were
losing all hope." Philadelphia Press.
"But I shall alwaya be a brother to you,"
he murmured.
"If 1 had any use for a brother." she
replied, sweetly, "1 could reach under the
sofa and get one right now." Philadelphia
Ledger.
Woodley It'a hard for us who are accus
tomed to speak only English to pronounce
some of these French words that are so"
commonly used.
Wise Oh, I don't think so.
Woodley You don't? Then how do you
pronounce e-m-b-o-n-p-o-l-n-t?
Wise Fat. Philadelphia Press.
LET 1I1M KNOW IT.
Cleveland Plain Dealer.
When a fellow pleases you
Let him know It;
It'a a simple thing to do
Let him know It;
Can't you give the scheme a trlalT
It Is sure to, bring a smile
And that makes It worth the while
Let htm know It.
You are pleased when any one
Lots you know It.
When tha mun who thinks "Well done"
Lets you know It.
For It gives you added zest
To bring out your very best
Just because some mortal blest
Lets you know It.
When a fellow pleases you
Iot him know It;
Why, it Isn't much to do
Let him know It;
It will help him In the fray,
And he'll think his efforts pay;
It you like hla work or way
Let him know It.
HEADACHES
l
HOU HEADACHES COMB TMOV
STB THOVBI.ES THAU FROM
AHT OTHEH CAVSB.
Many people suffer lntensa paiiu
whan they could be entirely
rallavad by
PROPER GLASSES
VT5 HATB XVHDBSDS OT CAS El
THAT BE AH US OUT IH
THIS STATEMENT
We Fit Glasses That
Relieve the Strain.
HUTESO!! OPTICAL CO.
EXCLUSIVE OPTICIANS
218 South Sixteenth Street,
Factory on the premises.
The favorite model of the Kimball
we sell for $300, This la a lower
price than this same piano Is sold
for by Kimball agents In many other
cities.
The saving to our customers comes
through the economy we effect by buy
ing carloads of pianos for Instant cash,
end the lessened expense we have In
selling large quantities and the saving
we muke customers by not paying com
missions. The Kimball piano Is built In one of
the model factories of the world.
The problem of making a high class
piano with the utmost economy has
been solved hete by the Kimball family
t.i this magnificent up-to-date plant.
We sell a new Kimball for 1300.
Pay $8.00 monthly. We guarantee the
lowest prices In the United States.
