B
2
TIIE OMAHA DAILY BKE; SUNDAY, JANUARY 28, 1900.
Tim Omaha Sunday Bef-
E. ROSE WATER. EDITOR.
PUBLISHED EVERT MORNING.
TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION'.
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Illustrated Il e, on year it-i'
Sunday bee. on year 2M
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THE BEE PUBLISHING COMPANY.
STATEMENT OF CIRCULATION.
State of Nebraska, Douglas County, s. :
C. C. Rosewater, secretary of Tne Pee
Publishing company, being 4ul sworn,
ays that the actual rumbet of uii and
Complete copies of The Dallv, Mo.-ilng,
Evening and Sunday Bee printed during
tha month of December, tk'i, was aii fol
lows: 1...
t...
$...
4...
..ai,nto it ao.oxv
,.3i,70 IS ,H,20
...1U.OMO It .11,770
..fti.ftr.o 20 iw.aa!)
S 81,70
6 81im
7 Ril.lAO
I JIlOO
I a-j,fKM
10 au.iso
U 81,044)
12 3I.7NO
13 ai.uso
u ai,NH
IS 8 1,7: to
16 aj,7io
Total .
Less unsold copies ..
ii i,o:o
22 Xi.lOO
23 H't.UNI)
24 itn.oso
26 :m.7ku
20 nia io
tj aa.uio
28 :i':,(Mio
29
30
31
..31.S40
. ..,!! I O
. .110,150
,..UM,U40
... 10,80M
Net total sales 071.S.W
Pally average 3I.3IU
C. C KOSEWATER,
Secretary.
Subscribed In my presence and sworn to
oefore me this list day of December, lDUu.
(Seal) il. B. HUN'JAl'K,
Notary Public.
. WHEN OtT OF TOWS.
Subscribers leaving; the city tem
porarily should have The lice
mailed to them. Addreaa will be
changed aa often requested.
Having vindicated himself before the
bar of Justice Noriuuu Hupgood might
udd to hid luureU by posing as complaiu
unt in n few suits.
or the stecnth time Coventor
Mickey has proclaimed his Intention to
leave the politlcul policing of Omuhu to
his nonpartisan police board.
As n matter of self-defense Iowa In
surance companies may be compelled to
Jd:i .n the demnnd for a rigid Inspec
tion !' I heir books and methods.
Aioi'.x-eo complains of Its poor system
of taxation, but to Judge by reports In
this Instance our so-culled enlightened
countries can teach the barbarluns little.
In splto of that corrected proofsheet
Secretary Loeb has generally proved
himself "safe" In acting as a bumper
between the president and people with
"graft"
Reorts from Albany Indicate that the
contractors who built New York's $30,
0"X),(MK capitol worked with an eye to
the future, as more repairs must be
made at once.
That Chicago reporter who refused a
present" of $100 Is more nearly the
ype of the American reporter than those
J-nrnullstlc grafters who always have a
hand out behind them.
Senator Molsbury of Iowa says the
"miscellaneous" account of insurance
companies should be nbolislied, but he
fails to show where the "legal" account
would ba any Improvement.
There U nothing surprising In the fact
that the Centum Kmperor has employed
a "water witch" to discover a well, us
he still believes lu another medieval tra
dition about the divine right of klugs.
The costs pf prosecuting Preacher
Wure for locating soldiers on the public
domain is computed at about $l'.),ooo,
but the cost of prosecuting Hlchards and
Cormtock has not yet been figured out.
France has added Its testimony to the
Mixdoin of M-nglng war Mithout the use
of firearms by boycotting the goods of
Venezuela. China may be asleep, but It
has taught the civilized M-oiid one les
ion. A man cannot serve tM-o masters.
President Shonts should either be re
quired to tender his resignation ns head
if the Panama Canal commission or re
ilgn the presidency of the Clover Leaf
railroad.
That the Chinese imperial commission
in will be duly Impressed Mith the dlg
)lty nnd ability of congress It Is to le
""'7 , 7
iou iwva-a-uuu uuiaiiuu wiiu iuh uiut-
ige account.
Ten years in the penitentiary for the
.ouiiutuuler of the Ceueral Slocumb Mill
probably do more than federal statutes
ind luseetors to cause ferryboat cai
ailns to take adequate measures for the
)rotectlon of passeuger' lives.
Attorney General Itrowu is not a
grandstand trust buster. That role M-as
exclusively reserved and preserved for
Uls demo-pop predecessor. Constantino
J. Smyth, Mho broke several lances Mith
the octopus Mithout accomplishing any
thing. British Columbia Is threatening to se
cede from Canada, but Mants to dis
cover a May to do lt and still remain
under the protecting folds of the Union
lack. Dominion polities may not be In
telligible to outsiders, but no one can
doubt Uie iuleusity of the feeling.
A great innny nostrums have been
prescribed by Insurance experts and In
surance reformers to curt lilsrli finance
innnliuliitlin nnd eliminate graft from
the management of life Insurnnee.
Many of those preserlptlons lmve some
merit, but most of tliem nre purgatives
tlint would Menken the patient without
restoring to him the most essential ele
ment of vitality popular confidence.
P.y nil odds the most simple and prac
ticable remedy tlint lins been prescrlled
up to dnte Is embodied In the recorn
mendations of the state commissioner i
of insurance of Wisconsin, who has sum-
marlzed his conclusions In a brief Insur- ,
T .. I. I.. , 1 . .. .. ..... t . t nllnutlnna '
mice primer lit mi' eimu wi
and answers:
Q. What Is a life Insurance company
organized for?
A. To furnish life Insurance.
Q. What Is the only purpose for which a
life Insurance company can receive money?
A. To furnish life Insurance.
q. If, then, a policyholder has paid to
the company more money than was required
to pay for the Insurance provided In his In
surance policy contract, what Is the only
Justification for the retaining of over-payment?
A. To furnish more life Insurance, or to
add the over-payment to the reserve held
on the policy so as to shorten the period
of future premium payments.
In a nutshell, the functions of a life
Insurance company Is to assume the risk
of the mortality of the Insured Just as
the fire Insurance company assumes the
risk of the destruction or partial destruc
tion of the property It Insures. Nobody
ever expects n lire Insurance company
to pay back part of the premium it ex
acts for Insuring ft building and if con
ducted on the same principle no life In
surance company would exact from the
Insured any more than is sufficient to
compensate it for the risk It assumes.
Life Insurance Is not designed pri
marily as an Investment. Thnt function
belongs to the savings bank and other
Institutions organized to re-loan surplus
earnings and savings of people who are
not able or willing to assume the risk of
making their own limns or investments.
The abolition of premium dividends
would, doubtless, curtail the profits of
insurance agents, but it would be coun
terbalanced by the number of policy
holders and the aggregate volume of In
surance premiums.
UN TUE HIUUT TRACK.
We do not know who he is nor what
his iuu!ilk-utiona tire for the position
he seeks, but a Ijincaster county man, '
who has Just unnounced his candidacy j
for the legislature, has the correct Idea
of what the public Is just now demand
ing. In u letter published In his home
paper he says:
My name has been presented to the pub
lic as a candidate for the legislature, and
If nominated and elected I shall serve to
the best of my ability and for the welfare
of the great commonwealth of the state of
Nebraska.
The next legislature will again elect a
United States senator. In all probabilities
he will come from north of the Platte. We
want to elect a man who will uphold the
hands of the administration and our chief
executive, Theodore Roosevelt.
At this time It Is highly necessary that
all our representatives In Washington
should be In sympathy with President
Roosevelt In his efforts to regulate trusts
and corporations and also against the un
limited power of the railroads. It can only
be accomplished by sending a strong dele
gation to the next state convention, pledged
to the support of President Roosevelt, and
who will carry out the will of the people.
SAMUEL T. LANG.
This Is along the right track. The
people may want a whole lot of other
questions answered before they give
their support this year to anyone seek
ing election to the legislature, but
above nil. they will Insist on knowing
whether he Is In sympathy with or op
posed to the program of railroad regu
lation nnd trust repression, for which
President Roosevelt stands. Every man
who wants to go to the next legisla
ture In Nebraska will have to come out
In the open and declare himself on
every vital Issue.
A THREAT OF SECESSION.
British Columbia Is threatening seces
sion from the Canadian confederation if
the Dominion government does not treat I
the province better financially. It M-nnts
a larger subsidy than It Is now receiv-
ln?- British Columbia was admitted Into
the confederation and granted respoU'
sible government In 1S71. It came In
under specified conditions, among these
being the grunt of a considerable sub
sidy by the central government and the
pledge of a transcontinental railM-ay.
The rallM-ay M-as completed, but the peo
ple of the province do not think that
they are now fairly treated in the mat
ter of subsidy. It appears that Canada
distributes a provincial subsidy fund of
I about !f4.K,(HK) a year, In addition to
, tiu. ,inrger sums expended upon public
works Mithln the various dintriets. Of
the subsidy fund the allotment to llrltlsh
Columbia Is only $:7,00a It Is claimed
that since the confederation the province
has paid Into the federal treasury some
$-i.VR)0,UK. while ouly about flKMMiO.OiH)
I utl? ci
has come back In the form of subsidies
and appropriations,
Thp provincial legislature Is now in
session and Its opening was marked by
a speech of one of the members In which
he urged the provincial government to
ask better financial terms from the Do
minion and In case of refusal to prepare
a petition to King EdM-ard requesting
the severance of the ties between Krltlsh
Columbia and the Canadian confedera
tion. The report states that the speech
M-as greeted Mith much applause. It
seems evident thut the people of the
! province are very much In earnest In
this matter and It also appears that they
have very giksl reason for their com
plaint. While It is not at all probable
that Rritlsh Columbia will make any
serious attempt to secede, because lt
Mould undoubtedly prove futile, if the
people jtorsist, as they doubtless will. In
their demand the central government
Mill prolably grant lt. The province Is
too Important a part of the Canadian
confederation to permit of p wlth-
draM-al nnd therefore It Is safe to say
thnt Its appeal will ln beetled. It has
been suggested that It might not lv n
bnd Idea for Prltish Columbia to Imitate
the experience of Texas In using Inde
pendence as n half-M-ay house to Incor
poration with the t'nlted Ftates.
M1;M1SK AKD rERFUttMAKI E
The old adage that men nre to be
Judged by their actions and not by their
promises has once more been verified.
The hopes Inspired by the seductive
i promises of reform In the administration
pf tue ntillin of tj)e county, which the
taxpayers of Douglas county had been
leil to i,ppVe WOuld go Into effect when
the new county board came Into power,
have gone glimmering. The old ring has
been wrung out, but the new ring has
promptly taken its place.
It was promised, for example, that
the odious system of petty graft In the
shape of charges for marriage certificate
chromos and fees for posting notices on
the walls of the court house would be
abolished with the Incoming of the new
county judge. But the promised reform
has not yet materialized.
It was promised thnt the Jail feeding
graft would be summarily cauterized,
but after weeks of wrangling and Jung
ling the proposition to lop off extrava
gant feed bills has been voted down and
a renewal of the jail graft In a new
form has been voted up. The position
tnken by the members of the new lxnrd
on this Issue Is not only calculated to
nrouse Indignation but most profound
disgust. The vote registered on this
Issue stands as follows:
Tor the continuation of the Jail graft
Commissioners Keiiniird, Trainor nnd
Ure.
For the abolition of the graCt Com
missioners Pruning and Solomon.
And the end Is not yet. K.xporlencfe
has shown that one graft always begets
more craft.
ANOTHER VASAL lJlFFICCLTY.
Shall the eight-hour day continue to
be observed in the work on the Isthmian
canal is n question which congress will
have to determine. There Is a statute
that on all government work eight hours
shall constitute a day nnd this has been
enforced since work on the canal began.
It Is understood that the administration
Is not favorable to having this contin
ued nnd there is a provision in the ur
gent deficiency bill, which carries an ap
propriation for the canal, to remove the
elKUt.i,our restriction
To this the labor
organizations strenuously object and
they have representatives In Washing
ton charged with the duty of exerting
every Influence In their power to pre
vent the proposed legislation.
Secretary Tuft says it is imperative
thnt the eight-hour restriction be lifted
from the canal gone, as otherwise the
success of the enterprise will be ma
terially hampered. The members of the
canal commission and the chief engineer
concur In this view. The latter is re
ported as saying that the greatest pres
ent obstacles in the way of construction
are the labor laws of the United States.
It now appears probable that congress
will adopt the provision in the urgent
deficiency bill removing the eight-hour !
restrlction as to the canal zone, but If )
It should not the Inevitable effect will
be to delay the completion of the canal
and add materially to Its cost. There
Is no sound reason why the eight-hour
day should apply to the canaL work,
since the labor employed there Mill not
come Into competition with that any
Miiere else, or M-lth that of American
M'orklngnien. Those Miio urge that the
eight-hour day be maintained on the
Isthmus are fighting ugalnst the public
Interest.
THE AWAKES1XG IN CHINA.
The sending of an imperial commis
sion to this country by the Chinese gov
ernment, to study political and other
conditions here, Is another evidence of
the awakening lu China to the expe-
dleucy of Instituting such changes and
reforms In the governmental system of
the empire as shall be found practicable
and essential to place that nation in
better accord and closer relations Mith
the rest of the world. The spirit of
progress appears to have taken hold of
the Imperial authorities, M-ho are mani
festing a disposition to depart from
some of the traditions and methods of
centuries and get Into line Mith mt st
ern Ideas and civilization. In his letter
to Presideut Roosevelt the emperor of
China declares "a firm determination to
Improve the present order of things,"
and the fact of a commission coming to
the United States to study our political
system suggests the possibility of some
radical changes In China. Tliese Mill
not take place In the near future. A
system of government that has existed
for ages cannot lie radically changed at
once. The operation must proceed grad
ually. It is a most Interesting fact,
however, that It Is In view and that
there Is started an actual effort to bring
lt about.
The impulse that China has received
in this respect Is of course largely due to
Japan. The progress which that poM-er
j has made Industrially and commer
clally and its success lu M-ar have natur
ally Impressed China that she, too, can
advapec and attain a iosltlon among
the M-orld poM-ers If she Mill but aban
don the traditions and policies that are
an obstacle to progress. She has Abun
dant resources for great Industrial and
commercial development, Mith an Indus
trious and thrifty ierple M-ho readily
adapt themselves to every form of la
bor. Her territory is iiom- free from
any danger of dlsmemlcrment and she
can prepare for Its defense should dan
ger come In the future. This she Is al
ready doing, having noM a large and
M-ell-equlpped army that can be in
creased to any proportions the govern
ment may deem necessary.
There are some M ho regard the Chl
nese awakening as a incuace to the
western world. There Is no sound rea
son for such a view. The advance of
that vast empire, with its teeming popu
lation, to u larger development and n
better civilization must rather prove of
Ix'ticfit to the rest of the world. What
Its possible contributions to the wel
fare of mankind may tie caonot be fore
seen. The extent nnd value of its re
sources are not known. But there Is
reason to believe that its contributions
Mould lie great while It Mould take
from the other nations all and more
than It gave them. The desire of China
to Improve conditions need cause no np
prehenslon and deserves every encour
agement The information which the Chinese
commission Mill obtain here undoubt
edly will be of much help to the gov
ernment In Its purpose to Improve the
present order of things, and it Is need
less to say that It will be afforded
every opportunity to secure the knoMi
edge it seeks.
A IfATVRALIZATION BILL.
The question of reporting a bill re
lating to naturalization Is being consid
ered by the house committee on natur
alization, which M ill probably decide to
report the measure framed by ..Repre
sentative Waldo of New York, which
provides for certain reforms that have
been recommended by the president and
the attorney general. The committee
a few days ago heard testimony on the
subject, one of the M itiiesses being the
clerk of the federal district court in
Brooklyn, Mho has had to do Mith the
naturalization of many thousands of Im
migrants each year nnd is therefore
fully conversant Mith the practical
working of the present law. He spoke
in favor of the Waldo bill.
Both President Roosevelt and Attor
ney General Moody have earnestly
urged legislation revising the system of
naturalizing nlieus. He stated In his
last annual message that during the
year evidence had accumulated sIiom--Ing
the necessity for revision. A com
mission appointed by the president to
examine the naturalization laws and
suggest appropriate measures to avoid
the abuses resulting from the improvi
dent or unhuvful granting of citizen
ship submitted a report recommending
the creation of a bureau of naturaliza
tion, uniformity of naturalization cer
tificates, more exacting qualifications for
citizenship, nnd that jurisdiction to nat
uralized aliens be confined to United
Stntes district courts and certain state
courts, but federal courts to have ex
clusive jurisdiction In cities of over 100,
000 inhabitants. These recommenda
tions are met by the Waldo bill. That
such legislation Is desirable Is attested
by the great exteut of fraudtflant nat
uralization, as shoM-n from the Investi
gations of government officials. The
safeguarding of American citizenship Is
a duty of the highest importance.
Perhaps the compilation and publica
tion of a "Rnllwny Ready Letter
Writer" would fill the bill better. Such
a volume would give the forms for writ
ing letters on rate regulation fitted to
1 each class of railwav erunloves. nil nrnn.
el.,y ,ndexed BO that iOCOmotIve en-
glneer, the traveling freight solicitor,
the telegraph operator and the office boy
could each pick out at a moment's no
tice the particular letter he Is expected
to sign.
According to the gospel of Governor
Mickey, the duty of upholding the su
premacy of the hM' rests primarily Mith
.. . . ,
the mayor, and "If the mayor of Omaha
is not anve to ins responsibilities and
does not perform his full duty under
the statutes, lt Is an unfortunate con
dition of affairs and the blame must
largely rest on those Miio elected him to
office." Would not that also apply to
those Miio elected the governor?
As might have been expected, the
double-Jointed statehood bill encoun
j tered no obstacle on the dry dock of the
senate. The ways M-ere all greased and
j the bill Is to be railroaded through nt a j
I mlle-n-mlnute speed, Mithout stopping at '
the water tank. The Atchlsou, Topeka
& Santa Fe Mill lose no time in filling
the four new senatorial chairs before
, , ,,, , A, ,
the rate regulation bill reaches the final
passage stage.
It Is much easier to convict a South
r, , . . . .1,.
Dakota preacher Mho has ventured Into
, . ... , , 41 .
the land-grabbing business . through
fraudulent soldiers' homestead entries
than lt Is to convict fore-handed Ne
braska or South Iiakota cattle barons
Miio do the same business along scien
tific lines, Mith political influence be-
hind them and luUe-wurm prosecutors In
front of them.
Secretary Taft has cabled to the Phil -
Ipplnes that there Is not the slightest
vestige of truth In the report that the
Islands and natives are to be sold to
the best bidder, and the cable company
has charged lt up In Its monthly bill j
agnlnst Its best customer, Miio Is your
I'ncle Samuel.
" .
A Chicago newspaper reporter has
suddenly Achieved national notoriety
for accepting a rebate from one of the
Attorneys of the Beef trust. Put why
make such a great hullabal
ii i . i
labaloo about a
reporter Miio takes $10 and keep it
dark about favored shippers?
Democrats ir.rtke a great showing of
love for the worklngman by clamoring
for an eight-hour day on the Panama
canal, but the real democratic idea may
be learned by examining labor laws In
southern states where the party Is su
preme. . Provorattoa for Joy.
Baltimore American.
A woman's club In an Indiana town has
disbanded, the member coming to the con
clusion that the home life Is better for
their sea Husbands are rejoicing, ana
doubtless the sveut b celebrated
the masculine clubs of the town with the
usual male ceremonies of rejoicing.
Pugilistic Diplomacy.
Cleveland leader.
No use worrying about the conference
at Algeclras until It Is all over. In a
linguistic way. European diplomats some
what resemble American pugilists.
Relief for the Poor.
Washington Post.
Tm "Pullman company will Issue no
more free passes. It Is hoped that the
Increased revenues thus gained will war
rant the company In paying the sularles
of Its porters Instead of asking the trav
eling public to do It.
Pre-eminent In Poor Company.
Chicago Tribune.
A nation Is known by the company It
keeps. The nation which imposes a tax
on the Importation of works of art ere
China, Turkey. Persia. New Zealand, Sierra
Leone, the Bahamas, FIJI, the Gold Coa;t
of Africa and the United States of Amer
ica, China taxes art Importations five per
cent Turkey eight per cent. Sierra Leone
ten per cent and the United States twenty
per cent. Kven In bad company we are
pre-eminent.
Preventing Waste of Water,
Boston Herald.
When water has to be paid for at meter
rates there Is a marked decrease In the
consumption. The Installation of water
meters usually does away wfth two great
sources of waste. In the aummer the un
thinking allow water to run In order that
It may be cool for drinking purposes and
In many households a gallon thus Is waste 1
for every gill legitimately used. In the
winter the water Is allowed to run to keep
It from freezing, a practice that also en
tails nn enorn-ous wnste. If nil water was
sold by meter rates and those rates were
only hleh enoush to cover the expenditure
of the department It would be better for
all water consumers, though possibly not
for the wasters.
The Democratic Spirit.
Baltimore American.
Professor Eliot of Harvard says that
the constant trend of the times Is towards
democracy and tlint Its Influence Ik felt
In the home ns well as upon the nation.
He declares that while It Is lessening ar
bitrary parental authority there Is no real
lessening of respect and duty of children
towards parents and grandparents, und
that the democratic spirit Is also respon
sible for the Increase In the deference and
respect shown to women. It Is nulte In
vigorating to have a prominent public
speaker advance such optimistic views, in
opposition to the usual fashion of dole
fully looking upon the world as going
headlong to the dogs, with all the virtues
vanishing and all the vices In the saddle
in a mad gallop to destruction.
low vs oLu-TinF, Hovninon.
FltllnK Trlbnte Paid to Ei-fiovernor
Lnrrnhec.
Springfield (M;is.) Republican.
The legislature of Iowa gave a reception
Saturday to former Governor Iarrabee,
upon the occasion of his 74th birthday. It
was an event without precedent In the his
tory of that state, and Monday evening the
wives of the senators and representatives
gave a reception to Mrs. Larrabee at the
Savery hotel In Des Moines. To the recep
tion of the former governor former Gov
ernors Horace Roles, Frank D. Jackson and
Leslie M. Shaw were bidden, former Gov
ernor Jackson alone being able to accept the
Invitation.
William Larrabee was Inaugurated gov
ernor In 188(1, and again In 18S8, serving two
terms. After that, In 1K9S, he Inaugurated
the then new departure of placing the state
institutions under a board of control, of
which he waa made chairman, and where he
served for two years. He waa also presi
dent of the Iowa commission at the recent
St. Louis exposition. There waa no qualifi
cation In the many expressions of high re
spect which last week's reception brought
forth. Governor Larrabee'a record In the
executive office was that of a thorough
business man, who carried Intelligent over
sight Into all the state institutions, and
made his work as governor notable In mat
ters of taxation, particularly na applied to
railroads. During his second term a rail
road law was enacted by which the au
thority of the state over rates was firmly
established. In his address to the legisla
ture former Governor Larrabee said that
the Iowa method of giving to puhllc officers
i th0 rlht to flx railroad rates had been the
model for a score of years, and he believed
j that conjfrPSII mlBht weI, adopt lt. n? pal(1
i high tribute to the present executive. Gov
ernor Cummins, and urged the assembly to
pass a law abolishing railroad passes, and
declared that the state's next duty was to
establish a hospital for consumptives. By
way of emphasizing this last point he de
clared that Iowa has about 7,000 people
afflicted with that disease continuously, and
about 2,0(0 die annually, after a lingering
Illness of about two and half years.
PRIVATE AM) PI III. If MORALS.
How Wr tapir from llluh Ideal on
Two Days of the Yrnr.
Speech of Mark Twain at Carnegie Hall.
During 33 days In the year the American
cltlien Is true to his Christian private
morals and keeps undeflled the nation's
character nt its best and highest; then,
" the other ,wo day of the eT he ,
leaves his Christian private morals at home
on,, carrles ,,, CnrUtlan publlc mora,s to ;
' tnc tax office and the polls and does the
: test he can to damage and undo his whole '
year's faithful and righteous work. With- ,
nor m hlimh he will vote for an unclean
out a musn "e wl" ole ,or an "nt'Lan
boss if that boss Is his party's Moses; with-
out compunction he will vote against the Index. This Is the twenty-second year or
best man In the whole land if he Is on : the work, each Issue surpassing Its prede
the other ticket. FJvery year In a number j cessor until It has become a standard
of cities and states he heli.s to nut cor-
rupt men In office, whereas If he would but
throw away his Christian publlc morals
and carry his Christian private morals to
; the polls he could promptly purify the pub
lie service ar.d make the possession of office
a high and honorable distinction. j
...... .. V, a !,.- aaM I, la rt, l at I ft n
' prlvate muraia and hires a ferryboat and !
,,11(.s ,, is bonds in a warehouse In Now
! Jersey for three days and gets out his 1
Christian public morals and gos to the
tax office and holds up his hand ana
swears he wishes he may never-never If
he's got a cent in the world, so help hi in !
The next day the list appears In the papers
a column and a quarter of names, in tine
print, and every man In the list a billion-
J aire and member of a cou:le ft churches.
. . . frleIK,iy.
1 gocJal ani criminal relation with the whole j
i of them. They never miss a sermon when '
J they are se a to be around, and they never ,
I m ss swearing-on nay, wiiruier iiiy aio i
. . . . . ,
BO S to oc arouuu m nui. i
I i umf&
! ling.
d to be an honest man. I am crumb- I
No I have crumbled. When they ,
1 assessed me ut fTS.OcO a fortnight ago I j
went out and tried to borrow the money, 1
and couldn't; then when I found they W( re j
letting a whole crop of millionaires live
In New York at a third of the !rlce they :
were charging me, I was hurt. I was In- i
dlgnant, and s.iid: "This Is the last
feather! I am not going to run this town !
all by myself." In that moment in that j
memorable moment I began to crumble.
In fifteen minutes the disintegration waa j
complete. In fifteen minutes I was be
come Just a mere moral sandpile; and I
lifted up my hand along with those sea- I
aoned and experienced deacons and swore
off every rag of personal property I've got
In the world, clear down to crrk leg, glaa
lojejs and what U left of my wig.
NOW BUY PIANOS
WHY?
LOOK AT THE PRICES!
Full Size Upright Ilerlich Piano $100
Big Oak Upright Wellington Piano $119
Up-to-date Upright Ebony Vose Piano $150
Fine Finished Upright Mahogany Victor Piano $165
Purl Walnut Upright Keller Piano $200
(lenuine Upright Mahogany Whitney Piano $200
All on easy payments $10 cash; $5 per month.
Why rent when you can buy nearly new instruments at
thef e low figures!
A. HOSPE CO.,
1513 DOUGLAS STREET.
Ivnabe and Kimball Agents. Have You Joined the Sheet Music Club?
8
wifli'HMii'MWiWarca i
. SKflLAIl SHOT!) AT THE PI I. PIT.
Portland Oregonlun: The triumvirate now
In charge of the spiritual and material wel
fare of Zlon City announces that outsldj
money will be welcomed. In this respect,
at leant, the Dowle policy has not bven de
parted from.
Cleveland Lender: The Pennsylvania
priest who personally upbraided In his pul
pit a number of swains In his flock who had
been courting thiir sweethearts for a year
or more used the big stick with good effect.
The marriage bans were quickly forthcom
ing. Minneapolis Journal: At Schenectady, N
Y., Kdwnrd Kverett Hale, Jr.. president of
t'nlon colleg", arose In his place at a le
vlval service, gave testimony to his con
version and confessed his wonder that he,
the scion of a long line of Unitarians,
should be brought to a saving knowledge
of the truth In a Methodist meeting. We
trust he may now have some Influence with
his father.
Iioston Transcript: The Des Moines par
sons have decided to be good. How good
deponent salth not, but when they put their
heads together the other day and discussed
their responsibilities as dispensers of mat-
rimony it seemed likely that Des Moines
might soon surrender Its fame us the great
est of Gretna Greens. In any case the I3e
Moines parsons mean well and will try
hard to Improve. There's plenty of room.
And the room Isn't all out In "Ioway,"
either more's the pity! There are clergy
men who will gladly marry a runaway girl
to a boy In short trousers or to a veteran
of the Mexican war or to an African
dodger or to a gentleman from Che-Foo. ,
"Romances" of this sort get wired around I
the country ever day. What doesn't get J
wired around Is the subsequent woe. Now,
of course, there's small hope of abolishing
Gretna Greens althogether. Girls Mill be
fools now and then and some of them are
bound to marry little boys, antiquated war
riors, Chinamen and negroes. Ministers
must be provided to tie the knot. But such
ministers ought In common decency to quit
preaching the gospel.
PERSON AI, A.D OTHERWISE.
Still, some people maintain a poor Mann
has no show In New York society.
Russell Sage wisely says a man cannot
possess, too much money, especially when
the market rate Is soaring.
For delicacy of touch and effectiveness
as a borrower. Colonel Mann comes up,
full length, to the Cassie Chadwick stand
ard. Mark Twain Insinuates In his mirthful
way that most men, when the assessor
Is near, swear like the historic army of
Flanders. Thai's no Joke.
Predictions about the condition of win
ter's spinal column will look better In
print six weeks hence. Premature gaiety
might lift the lid at Medicine Hat.
"No seat, no fare," Is the slogan of St.
Louis street car riders. Although the Strap
Hangers' League Is pretty well squeeied,
Its vocal org .ns are In good working order.
Benedicts responsive to the sympathetic
touch can do some good by handing a
bunch to the unfortunate Chicago man
who lost his voice while arguing with his
wife.
A philanthropic genius left (10,000 to be
used In circulating a book, "How to be
a gentleman," In Missouri. The "Myster
ious Stranger" needs coaching In his new
environments.
Some regret Is' expressed because Jack-the-Stabber
of St. Iouis did not give the
police a pointer before disappearing. Ac
cording to local critics, what the police
need is a meat ax in robust hands.
A blooming statesman of the Osier class
has Introduced In the Ohio legislature a
bill providing a chloroform route for peo-
' P'e afflicted with Incurable diseases. The
bill should Include Incurable manias so
that a preliminary test might be made on
the au,h,r; , ,aJt
Practically all the historic data of 105
that wort preserving is compiled In
convenient form In the Chicago Dully News
Almanac and Year Rook for 190. In ad-
dltlon to the year's events a vaat amount
of useful Information Is crowded into its
u
. 4T0 pages, supplemented with a copious
! reference dook lor busy people.
YOUR. COLLAR.
A collar must fit tho occasion and
fit the neck. You have no ideu of
true collar comfort until you have
tried the Cluco Shrunk, 1-4 size
ARROW
They fit exactly, they are in every
height, there are over one hun
dred styles, all made of fully
shrunk fabrics. They're the long
est wearers and best appearing
collars, else they wouldn't here.
15c, 2 for 25c
Browning, King & Co
R S. WILCOX, Manaqer.
KKMOS DOII.KO DDWK.
Life's nst comes In Its toll.
There Is no Justice without love.
Sin and sorrow often have the same root.
Religion Is more than a prayer In the slot
machine.
It's a poor kind of faith that you have to
have faith In.
love dees not overlook faults; It look
through them.
It takes more than pulpit thunder to
strike sin down.
You cannot give life to men without glr
lng life for them.
You do not escape from temptation by
j -1" from trial.
Where the life knows no waste the heart
knows no wealth.
Salvation may be sensational, but sensa
tion Is not salvation.
There Is more good In a bad boy than In
tho best of dead men.
Many of our prayers are walling the en
dorsement of our deeds.
When a man's head Is swollen he Is sure
to get a twist In his eyes.
Human hearts are the only pages on
which church history can he written.
The man who kicks most when the train
j "'fttc "f'rn ,thp Ia8t "e to to ,,,ur, h
People will always receive good advice n
a demonstration when they would reject It
as a proposition.
The most common fallacy In this world U
the mistaking of moral specifications for
the materials themselves. Chicago Tribuno.
DOMESTIC PI EASAM HIP.S.
"Bobble, were you looking through the
keyhole last night at me una your Mister.'"
"Honest, no. Mother was In the way."
RrouKlyn Life.
Miss Pechls Mr. Tlmmld hoa asked If ho
might cill tonight. 1 think he wants to tell
me that he loves mo.
iier oisier in, mai goes without say
li.w Miss Pechls Yes, and I'm afraid he will,
too. Philadelphia Ledger.
Myrtle Look what a lovely engagement
diamond ring George has given me.
Kstelle Ves; ifB lovely. H nearly broke
my heart when I sent it back. Halt 1 more
American.
Jonesmlth My wife was such a pensive
creature before I married her, but she ap
pears to have gotten all over It now.
lirownwrlght 1 see. You mean she's ex
pensive now. Philadelphia Press.
Cholly Do you think lt would be foolish
of me to marry a girl who was my In
tellectual Inferior?
Dolly More than foolish Impossible.
Cleveland Leader.
Miss Ascum Do you really think It's
possible to tlnd out who your huxbaud will
be by consulting a fortune teller?
Miss Mulnchanz 1 don't know, but I
recently found cut who my husband
wouldn't be by consulting one.
Miss Ascum Really 1 Who was the for
tune teller?
Miss Mainchans Brodstreet. Cleveland
Leader.
VKVER MINI), SI Y UEAII.
A. J. Waterhouse In San Francisco Call.
Has the day been dark and the Bky been
gray?
Never ; uu mind, my lad.
Whistle a bit In a cheery way;
lMn't take time to be sud.
Oh, Worry s a siecter ot visage grim.
First Imp on the fiendish list;
But smile In his face when you look at
him.
He fades like the morning mist.
Did the dream that you dreamed go some
what wrong?
Never you mind, my dear.
Out of tho shadow will Iloat a song,
If only your soul will hear.
Ah, Worry's a phantom, and Worry's
ghoul,
And Worry's a goblin of night.
He flee from a smile, .but he comes at
scowl.
And a sigh Is his cruel delight.
Oh, I know of the hope that Is burled from
sight.
Rut biuvely weil bear lt, my dear.
For the sunilu'ht Is' born of the womb of
the night.
And the comforter ever Is near.
Yes. bravely we'll bear It, my dear you
nr. d I
And strength to our souls will be given.
Though Worry doth whisper and mutter
l is He,
Earth swings to the solace of heaven.
I would fain hold your head on my com
forting breast
Till a smile glimmer out through the
tettr' . . .
But the battle of each is for each, and
the rest
Know little that gladdens or cheers.
Bo we'll both do our best, whatever It be.
And we'll smile Uirouuh the pitiful rain.
Till the phantom of Worry forever shut)
And m know that e'en Sorrow la gain.