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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 29, 1905)
THE OMAHA ILLUSTRATED BEE.
January 29, 1903.
High Grade Woo Dress Goods
New Spring Goods Are Here
Examine our stork and you will
find everythlrg that other storew
have aa well as thousands of thlnits
that they have nnt that are con
fined to ua for Omaha.
We have M oh aim In black, white,
cream and every shade In plain
colors, besides all the New Mix
tures, Mercerized Warp. 811k
Warp, Linen Warp, etc at.
yard, up from 12 50, tl 98, Cflo
tL60, $1.26. 11.00. roc and....ou
New Panamas In all the new spring
effects, plain mannish, etc., R4
Light Weight Tailor Suitings
Handsome new German Worsteds,
In all the new effects, ((
at, yard, U.50 and i-JKJ
Voiles and Eolliennes
We have all the new mannish
effects In Voiles, and all the' new
Malangee In Voiles, and all the
I Jain shades, etc., also the new
In Buedes, crepes, Jacquardn. etc.,
St, yard, up from II. W, 7 j-1",
$1.60, 11.25. 11.00 and ow
Cravenettes, Aquarellas and
Prtestlev's Cravenettes, R flfl
at, yard, $1.25 up to - JV
Mneh Shower Froofs,
at. yard. 11.00 up to..
M-lnch Aquarelle, the newest Rain
proof (roods on the 'JS.
market, at, yard ttMi
We are headquarters for all
these Roods at I1.2.1 to $3.00 per
yard. Spring samples now ready.
Popular Priced Dress Goods Department
Closing out all heavy -winter dress good and patterns of all kinds of all wool and silk and
wool dress goods.
About fiOO patterns that wild from $1.50
to $2.50, will go at yard
Clearing out remnants of high grade
goods, at, yard, 2i2'2c and
About 1,000 heavy wool suiting patterns,
that sold from $1.50 to $3.00, yard....
About 500 patterns that sold at $1.00 to
$1.08 will go at yard
BY THE YARD ON BARGAIN SQUARE
25 pieces of all wool suiting, that sold 7C I 15 P'e of a" woo goods, that sold tip
at $1.50 to $3.00, at yard I U
13 pieces of goods that sold up to $1.50
Closing out all our high grade French flannels and French challies, worth 6c to $1.00,
at vard ....... imj
to $2.00, will go at yard.
A great tunny pieces that sold up to
$2.00, at. yard
THE RELIABLE STORE.
Watch for Oreat Sal on Fancy
Monday we will sell ataple notions for less
than like goods have ever before been sold.
1 yards Baby Ribbon j
I packages Pins
I sihkiIs Thread
t mools of Bcldlng Bros." 811k
1 ti reaa ror.
Great Notion Sale
i yards Velveteen Binding
I balls of Sllko
I packages Trowel's or Mlllward'i
1 sets of Knitting Needloa
2 sets Crochet Hooks
2 cards of Hump Hooks and Eyes
2 dozen Pearl Buttons 4JC
2 Tnltlal Handkerchiefs
2 seta of best Dress Stays
2 balls Crochet Cotton
2 packages extra quality Envelopes
2 bottles Carter a Ink
Several other 6o articles will be
sold 2 for
New Turnover Collars, worth 15o to 2Ro
All go on sale Monday, Cp
at. each iJ
A beautiful line of 80c Embroidered TEf,
Collars, at, each AtJW
NEW F.MBROIDERim-Worth So, 10c 20c,
25c, 36c and Boc on sale 91r
at yard, Ifio. llUc, lc. "He, Be and... 3"
NEW LACES Worth lOo and 20o, 2aC
on sal at, yard, fro and w
Great Clearing Sale in Cloak
Our sale Saturday was so well attended by eager buyers that we have decided
to continue it Monday and offer gTeater values.
Remember every Winter Garment in the Cloak Department must and will be sold.
Your choice of any Winter Coat In the
house, worth $20, $25 and $30, for..
Your cholc of any Coat, -worth up to
Yonr choice of any Winter Buit In
for half price.
Your choice of Winter Capes, worth
$10, $12 and $15, for
Your choice of any Chllds' Coat In the
sizes 4 to 14 years, worth up to $10,
Your choice of any Chllds' Coat that
sold up to $7.50, for
Your choice of any Waist that sold as
high as $2, for
Your choice of any Waist In the house
that sold as high as $3, for
Y'our choice of any Waist that sold as
high as $5, for
Yotir choice of Women's Walking
Skirts, worth up to $3.08, for
Y'our choice of any Walking Skirt that
sold for $7.50, at
Thousands of bargains In our Skirt Department
Monday Morning Specials
8 to 9
Dressing Sacques, worth $1.50 and $2,
at 79c and
8:30 to 9:30
New Spring Suits and Coats
775 new Silk Shirtwaist Suits, made especially
for Harden Bros. These are all made In the new
and most up-to-date styles. In order to Intro
duce these to the public Immediately we will
give 25 per cent discount on every Silk Shirt
Waist Suit sold Monday Morning.
Ptkes-$12.S0, $15, $20 up to $35
rsew Covert Jackets, In all the newest
styles, at $4.08 and up to
China Department ' Flannel Department
15o extra heavy and wide Cotton flannel, qip
Fancy Colored Cream Sets, worth from 75c to soc extra soVWnVt'e WooTnanncV, t
$3.00 per set your choice Monday, 1f at- ard
at J 1 8 Ho Comforter Calico,
at, yard Ow
Decorated Plates, Cups, Platters, Saucers, Fruits, 1Bot bestmade yard wide Outing Flannel. qc
Bakers, Vegetable Dishes, Nappies, C bo AiWooV'EVdMdVwn,' o
etc.. at JC at, yard SOC
21.60 full size, all colors, extra soft and heavy flfi-
Glassware that Bells regularly from lfl Cotton Bed Blankets to close out pair VOW
25c to 50c, at 1UC All our 23.98 all wool and all colors large size O qq
Bed Blankets to close out pair "'"O
Fine Center Draft Metal Lamp With Decorated Our ll.BO Honeycomb Bed Spreads, Marseilles pat-
v,,, , ) rn ri no terns, extra heavy and full size, with or nun
ptandes regular $2.50 to $4.00 flOn without fringe, each VOC
. values, at eOl Our ll.OO extra large Crochet Bed Spreads, CQr
Marseilles patterns, each
fin Unusual Chair Offering
Three Good Chairs. Three Popular Prices.
Three Reasons Why You Should Avail
Yourself of this Chance.
These chal-s are all oak with golden finish and are
made bv a re'inble Sheboygan Wis., chair factory. The
construction Is the best they nave brace arms and cane
ceat; the finish Is Unit-class and the styles are new.
The TSc chMr Is similar to cut here' shown
The 21.00 and $1.25 chairs are both large, and finer
n everv wav the regular prices of these are $1.25, $1.50
nnd $1.75. By taking advantage of this sale you can buy
them for 75c, $1.00 and $1.25.
We are enabled to make this reduction on account of
having secured from the factory all the chairs of these
numbers which they carried In stock. As we bought a
large quantity we got a very low price.
The 75c chahr Is No. 12 tnO; the $1.00 chair is No. 448;
the $1.75 chair Is No. S8. These numbers are on the bot
tom of each chair.
Tou should buy now because you can save money.
Tou should buy now because oak chairs at these
prices are a rare thing.
You should buy now because you will not get such a
High Grade Wash Goods
In the Main Wash Goods Department
Prenoti ginghams, O Sfi
tbo and V. JU
VOILES AND MOIIAIR
We have the new spring Voile de
Lino, made to sell at 16a tfin
Monday sale, at
The new Voile re Regelne, made to
sell at 36o on sale 1QC
Arnold's celebrated Oreclan Voiles,
advertised In all fashion Journals,
sUso Arnold's mohair lustre.
Oroe Romans, French Organdies. 70
per cent silk, superb color- CQn
Ings and patterns, only J
Bhearur Iouth and Cle CXOc
nrnnillt, n t J Jt
at iibc liH: and
NEW MADRAS, PERCALES,
New Imported Scotch CXIQr
New Imported Madras, 36a, Qp
25c and tTrW
New French Percales and printed
Cambrics, yard wide, 12Ar
regular lo goods sfcjw
GINGHAMS AND CHAMPRATS.
S.ono pieces of French and domeetlo
Amoskeag, fast colors, tin Or
el y lea iot
Tolle du Nord. the most celebrated
American gingham 191-
Anderson's Scotch glng- f Cr
hams, lo and ,,JW
NSW WHITE WAI8TTNGS.
The new light-weight fabrics tot
spring l!i(V-Jacqimrds and all
over patterns, finely nier- 1Qft
cerlsed 6(c, 8oc, 25o and '"v
Cleslng out all the $1.00 JSp
heavy mercerised, at
Closing out all the t9c and f En
T5o heavy mercerised, at liJw
New Arellne cloths, Perlni
lawna, French lawns, batistes,
India linens, chiffons. mmiNsellnt'H,
eto., at very papular prlixs.
LININGS AND LINING SILKS.
We are headquarters for nil klnils
of linings and tailor' findings. i
all the fashion Journals tor
Sampson's lining silk.
Linens Linens Linens Linens Linens
LAST DAY OF OUR BIG JANUARY LINEN SALE
Mnndr w will Dlace on our line
nankins to matcni oivinea uo inio
same goods can be handled In this
Liot 1 All our Herman ana jrmn
bleached and unnleached tauie
linen that sold up to $1.50 7QC
per yard Monday, per yd.'w
Lot 3 All our German and Irish
bleached and unbleached table
linen that sold up to $1.;S C()
per yard at. yard u s
Lot t All our German and Irish
table linen that sold up to ACin
n counters $1,000 worm or tame aamasK (many or in patterns nav
four lots, and for one day we will sell ubom at lower prices than
country. For instance:
$100 per yard at, yar
Lot 4 All our German and IrUh
table linen that sold up AOf
to 75o per yard at, yard..."-'''
10c fine bleached sheeting, 01r
JVi yards wi le at, yard....
3-'Ho extra heavy blenched sheet
ing, 2'i yards wldu 9sp
at, yard AOW
10c fine soft finish cambric,
yard wide at, yard
15c fine Imperial long doth, r,
No. 90 at. yard vC
iPo ready-to-u pillow tir
cases at J
tbo ready-to-use bleaohed seamiest
sheets, slse 47 JC
40c mercerized eatoeu. black and
86c silk Moussellne de Sole C ,-,
ail shades at, yard IC'U
I I if We are receiving large shipments of new silks every day, which enables us to
j I I t show the most complete Hues of all the latest styles and -weaves of 10U5 silks, at
. OPTICAL DEPARTMENT
...Another Cut Price Sale....
Framelcss Kyeglasses Gold Tlated Mountings, worth $3.00, at 98c. Steel Spectacles, worth $1.50, at 49c
Great Shoe Sale
The Ultra $3.50 Shoe for Women at $2.00
We have decided to drop five lines of THE ULTRA $3.50 lace, patent calf and vlcl
kid, on account of the sizes being badly broken and to clear them up quickly, O ff
have marked them at the absurdly low price per pair ..VJJ
Never before sold below the advertised price $3.50.
Brooks Bros.' $3.00, $3.50 and $k.00 Shoes, $2A8
Brooks. Bros., makers of the best shoes manufactured In Rochester, N. Y., hare
gone out of business. We were Omaha agents and carried a lame and varied stork
of these shoes in order to close them out quickly, will for the next three y Afi
days sell all these $3, $3.50 and $4 shoes In vlcl kid and patent calf at, choice '
a very low price Monday we start the season at these quotations:
New plain Mesnallncs, the latest finish for a handsome spring dress 20 Inches
worth $1.00 dollar a yard, at, per yard
ine new Kijah silk in u full line of now colors, thirty inches wide Monday f r
at Ilayden's for, per yard I J
Oriental silk suiting, the latest novelty and most choice, silk for a suit come in all 1 no
shades, 1'7 inches wide, and can only be found at Ilayden's, for. per yard .l.JQ
A large line of Klaioua silks In the new patterns thirty inches wide Monday, A f
ior, per yam -...tZ
Color Taffetas, excellent finish, 10 inches wide, good for all purposes Monday a bar- A f
gain for, per yard M fjQ
Fancy silk suitings In every choice patterns and shadings, for this season's suits and O P
waists, 19 and 21 inches wide Monday for, per yard 'QDC
Specials in Black Taffetas
19 Inches wide regular 75o quality
24 Inches wlde.regular fo quality
27 Inches wide reeular $1.10 quality. e7-j
for. yard iOC
inches wide regular $1.10 quality
$6 Inches wide regular $1.50 quality,
Specials in Black Peau de Soie
19 Inches wide regular $1.00 quality, Monday fkCr
for. yard UvL
20 Inches wide regular $1.19 quality, Monday Ufln
for, yard OVU
27 Inches wide regular $1.10 quality, Monday ""eye-,
for, yard .. Ow
27 Inches wide regular $1.25 quality, Monday' s
for, yard I.U
36 Inches wide regular $1.1S quality, Monday flrt
for, yard fJt
SAMPLE CROWN SHOES for men,
worth $2.50 and $3.00; for three CQ
days, per pair
ALL 60O THREE POINT BLIP- OQf,
PERS during this sale
WOMEN'S 35C CARPET SLIP
PERS during thla sale
LADIES' SAMPLE AND REGULAR
STOCK SHOES-worth up to (
$3.60. In this sale I.OV
ALL $1.50 AND $1.39 FUR TRIM
MED JULIETS during this sale
MEN'S WOMEN'S AND MISSES'
VET CARPET SOLE WARM
LINED SLIPPERS, kt
JERSEY LEGGINGS For women,
and children; reduction sale
price 49c, 39c and
MEN'S $1.60 SATIN CALF LACE
SHOES, at ,
BOYS' $1.50 SATIN CALF LACE
YOUTH'S $1.60 BATIN CALF LACE
MISSES' $1 .60 VICI AND DONGO
LA LACS SHOES, at
WOMEN'S $1.78 AND $1,59 VICI
KID LACE SHOES, at
LITTLE MTSN'S $1.00 SATIN CALF
CHILD'S $1.00 SAMPLE- SHOES,
lace or button, hand turned soles.,
CHILD'S $1.25 SAMPLE SHOES,
lace, hand-turned soles
20 Off on All Stetson Double Sole Shoes
We are agents for the celebrated STETSON. CROSSETT and JOHN MITCHELL
Shoes for men and the ULTRA and G ROVER Shoes for ladies.
Extra help during this sale.
Hardware, Stoves and Housefurnishings
100 cases Granite Ware on sale Monday Articles
ranging from 20c to 35c eacn will stll at this sale for 10c. Kota
partial list of articles below of about 60 different articles.
Windsor Dippers. . . . ."TTT 10c
2-quart Mixing Bowl 10c
lYeservIng Kettles lOc
Soup Dishes 10c
Wash Basins 10c
Deep Pie Plates 10c
Sauce Puns 10c
Large Drinking Cups 10c
Large Soup Ladles 10c
3-quart Pudding Pans 10c
10-lb. sacks best kiln
dried Cornmeal loo
Pure Rye Flour, per
Fancy High Patent Min
. neaota Flour, sack. .$1.19
6 pounds best hand-picked
Navy Beans 19a
5 lbs, good Japan Rlce.l9o
6 lbs. best Pearl Tapioca,
Sago, Barley or
T pounds best k'!n-drled
10 bars best Laundry
Sapollo, per bar 5o
Pearilne, etc., per pkg. 2c
8 bars Wool Soap lOo
Castile Soap, per cake., 3c
Quart cans Golden Table
We cannot delay the excavatorsStock
must be sold regardless of cost.
1-pound Jars Pure Fruit
The best Soda, Oyster,
Butter or Milk Crackers
per pound 640
All regular 12o and 15o
Cookies, this sale thre
pounds for 2So
3-lb. cans Solid Packed
S-lb cans Hominy, Squash
or Sauer Kraut 7Hc
3-lb cans Boston Baked
2-lb. cans Sweet Sugar
8-lb. cans Early June
Sifted Peaa 7H3
2-lb cans Fancy Wax,
String or Lima Beans
Choice California Prunes,
per pound 4o
Fancy Santa Clara
Prunes, pound 6c
Fancy 3 Crown Muscatol
Raisins, pound 6o
Fancy 4 Crown Muscatel
Raisins, pound 6c
Peaches, pound 7Ho
Fency Mulr Peaches,
per pound 8Ho
Choice Cleaned Currants,
per pound 7Ho
Fancy Evaporated Rasp
berries, pound 23o
Fancy Pitted Plums, por
Fancy California Apri
cots, pound lOo
Fancy Baxtlett Pears per
Fancy Seeded Raisins,
per package no
The largest fresh fruit
department In the west
The car of Fancy High
land Navel Oranges for
this week's sale, was the
finest yet received.
Regular 85o4i)c Navels
elsewhere our price,
per dozen 26a
Regular 3oo Navels elne
where our price doz.2oo
Regular 2oo Navels ele
where our price, per
Regular 20o Navels else
whereour price, doi. loo
Regular 17Ho Navels else
whereour price, do.12o
Pure Colorado White
Clover Honey, rack.. Mo
Large Ripe Bunanaa,
per dozen 1-0
Bright and Entertaining Stories Gathered for the Little People
The liom that West to School.
ERO was a large Newfoundland
dog. He belonged to a boy who
lived In a small village la Maine.
Nero was very fond of his young
master. When the spring term o:
school began Nero always went with Gil
bert to the sohoolhouse door. He would then
lie down on the steps or on the grass In the
yard and wait patiently for school to clow
at noon. Ha was nloe and goodnatured, and
when the children came out to play at re
cess, he would get up and Join In their frol
ics, and he seemed to enjoy It all aa much
as any of them. -
It was very pleasant to lie and sleep out
In the soft grass In the shade of the apple
trees, through the spring, and even through
the first weeks of autumn. But when chilly
winds began to blow, and the frost had
withered the leaves, Nero found It rather
cold work to wait at the achoolhouse hour
He bore It quite well, however, until there
came a blustering day when the snow fell
steadily. That day. about 10 o'clock. Nero
pushed open the entry door, which was
slightly ajar, walked In and scratched
gently at the Inner door. The teacher heard
the sound and opened the door to see what
made It. Nero wagged his tall, shivering
and gave a pleading whine, as If he would
Ilk to say, "Please let me coma in and
Yes. yoa may, If you will be a good
dog." the teacher answered.
Nero walked in past her and lay down
near the big stove, giving a deep sigh of
After that day, Nero always came In with
the scholars when the bell rang, and took
Ilia place by the stove In a serious and dig
nified manner, that might well have been
copied by many of the pupils.
One morning In April, aa Nero Uy sunning
himself on the plana, he noticed the school
children passing with their books apd
slates. He sprang up. ran Into the house,
snlfling and whining at Gilbert's coat and
cap. that still bung In the hall.
Then, as If he had a sudden wild idea
that he might find Gilbert at the school
libuse. he bounded off down the street as
fast as he could.
The same teacher was again teaching
there, and she warmly welcomed Nero
when he scratched as usual at the door.
He cum In, and at one settled down
fjulctly In his old place, after casting a
glance around .at the children's places In
vain. Gilbert was not there.
But Nero had. It seemed, made up his
tnlad to bo a regular attendant at school.
He came every day, rain or shine. He soon
new the meaning of the bells, and when
ie children rose to march out at recess, he,
, was up in a moment, ana eiooa wav-
llig hi plumy tall until the last one had
nased out. Then he rushed out after them,
isurn iiko any gooo-naiurea, tun-ieving
Kor years Nero came to sohoot He never
I sued a day until he grew too old and
reble; and even when his poor old legs
rfused to carry him beyond the plana.
nmiM lie there and wistfully gaze after
ren as they passed-
ad girls of that school hare
never forgotten their good and noble school
mate. They often speak of Nero, the dog
that went to school. Selected.
The lore of grandmothers exceeds even
tliat of mothers, for they have the experi
ence of two generations instead of one.
A oertaln Massachusetts grandmother has
grandchildren In Honolulu, and last win
ter, musing over their dally llfo, she said
to her daughter at home:
"I must knit those children some mit
tens." "Mittens, mother!" cried the young
woman. "Mittens for that climate? When
are they going to wear them?"
"I can't help the climate," said the grand
mother, placidly. "Climate lias nothing to
do with It- All children like mittens, and
all children should have them. I shall take
tbeni up tomorrow."
She did take them, up, knit and bound
them off, and sent thorn to Honolulu.
She was Justified by the ovent, for the
children's mother wrote her on the hottest
day of the year: "I must tell you, though
in this heat I have hardly the energy to
hold my pen, that, although we grown
people are torpid under the infliction of the
weather, the children have demanded their
mittens, and are parading up and down,
wearing them and very little besides. No
matter how high, the mercury climbs. It Is
evident that those mittens are bound to
be an unfailing Joy." Youth's Companion.
When a Reindeer Is Angry.
We were forced to wait three days after
it had stopped snowing for a crust to form
so that we could travel again '(In Alaska).
It was with many misgivings that we
began the last half of the journey, since
the snow was now very deep and the
danger of our sinking Into drifts was great.
To add to our general feeling of fear, the
reindeer behaved very badly and were ex
ceedingly unruly. The wind had moderated
Somewhat, but It was still Intensely cold.
We had traveled half the day without
any serious mishap and were beginning
to forget our feara at starting out, when
we sped merrily dovwi a mountainside, sing
ing and hallooing at the top of our voicee,
and ran into a gulch and stuck there. The
songs stopped In our throats and we sprang
to our feet to sink waist deep In the drifts
that hod entrapped us.
Every movement of our bodies sank us
deeper In the snowdrifts, and the Infuriated
reindeer, finding themselves caught In the
banked-up snow almost to their haunches,
turned upon us and would have pawed us
to death but for the forethought of Oosllk,
who, seeing our danger, siu-aug forward
and hoisting the overturned pulks In his
strong arms, brought them down over our
heads and shoulders and pinned us out of
sight In the mow.
We heard the hoofs of Uncle Ben beating
on the pulk's side as he pawed up the snow
In his efforts to get at us, and If we hud
not kept the pulk over us he would have
tossed It In the nlr with one sweep of his
horns and would still have bad bis bout
with us. In which case wo should have
been helpless and completely at his mercy.
For the first time we had occasion to see
how fierce an angry reindeer can be. When
he was convinced that he could not reach
us. Uncle Ben turned upon OosiUk, and we
heard the Eskimo shouting and clubbing
the deer as he ran in and out of the pulks
In a swift circle, pursued by the bellowing
We spent an exciting half hour under the
pulks, with the hoofs of the deer rattling
like hall on the frozen boards, and then
the unuuual commotion ceased all at onco,
for the reindeer had found a lichen bed.
In a Jiffy they were pawing up the snow
In their hurry to get at the succulent
moss, and we were forgotten.
Amallk and Ooslllk lifted the pulks from
our heads and dug us up out of the snow
and set us on our feet. By the time the
reindeer had eaten themselves Into a pas
sable humor Amallk and Ooslllk led them
back to the pulks.
We had four hours of traveling before
we came In sight of the corral that had
sent us the reindeer from Eaton Station.
As soon as the deer scented the well known
corral they quickened their strides so that
we reached the station before It was quite
dark, and crawled from the sleds with a
deep feeling of relief, glad beyond meas
ure to be at home after the perils of our
protracted Journey. St. Nicholas.
Why Aobln Wnt Oamplnar.
Uncle Rob looked down at his small
namesak:. Ho was wondering if he really
was big enough to take.
"Some boys of 17 are babies yet, and of
course to have that kind along would be
no end of trouble," be said. "I'll see."
"I always walk to school with Gladys,"
Robin was saying, he trotted along.
"You see, there are some real rough boys
on Peck street and It's safer to have me
Uncle Rob nodded his head, but said
nothing. Just then they came to the most
Some Tersely Told Tales Both Grim and Gay
A Maaenlar Christina.
ENATOR BLACKBURN of Ken
tucky tells of a good old Metho
dist minister In his state in the
nlAnu, Aavm whA m,aa a "tnnAil.
kf"fll lar Christian."
"One day," says the senator, "after the
parson bad found it necesaary to administer
tlstlo punishment to several young toughs
who persisted' In disturbing the meeting at
one of the churches which he served, one
of his flock, noted as something of a hard
hitter himself, got up In meeting and said:
" 'It la a solemn duty of this here congre
gation to stand by Parson Johnson. He
does not seek trouble, but he will not show
the white feather when trouble is forced
In his way. I believe that, unrestrained by
divine grace. Parson Johnson can whip any
man In Kentucky. The Lord Is with him.
Let us pray,' "New York Tribune.
W. 8. Burgess, the yacht designer, was
talking at Murblehead about club life.
"Odd and amazing are the complaints that
the bouse committee of clubs receive," he
said. "I remember, at a club to which I
nice bit of carving, as you must concede
or to forego a fly myself. I beg to suggest
that in future when an omelet Is ordered
for four persons It should be served1 with
either (a) four flies, er (b) no flies at all."
A Good Remedy,
In the schools of a Connecticut town
measures were recently taken to test the
children's eyesight As the doctor finished
each school he gave the principal a list
of pupils whose eyes needed, attention,
and requested him to notify the children's
parents to that effect. One boy brought
home to his father this note from the
principal: "Mr. . Dear Sir: It becomes
my duty to Inform you that your son
shows decided indications of astigmatism,
and his case is one that should be attended
to without delay." The next day the
father sent the following answer: "Dear
Sir: Whip It out of him. Yours truly."
New York Tribune.
his experiences abroad. Among other
things be said:
"In Belgium, as a rule, when English
Is spoken to you. It Is excellent English.
Now and then, though, you come upon
some very curious mistakes.
"I attended a muslcale one day at an.
English woman's apartment. An admira
ble amateur on the violin was the guest of
honor. The man pla ed and 1 played, for
the encores were persistent, till finally bo
got a little Ured. He wished to say politely
to his hostess that lie was too weary to
play any longer, and the words he used
"Madam, dcr ghost ies- ready, but der
meat lss feeble.' "Kansas City Journal.
taaltty of Amblgalty.
Neither comic opera lokea nor fables it.
onoe belonged, a letter of complaint about slang form any part of George Ado's ordl-
tne restaurant that was sent In by a mil
llonalre. This letter was so Interesting that
I took a copy of It. Here Is the copy. I ll
read it from my notebook."
Mr. Burgeaa then read:
"Gentlemen: I have the honor to inform
you that I lunched at the club thla after
noon, and hud as my guests throe gentle-
jr vuuversauon. Me is, however, rather
given to indulging In a quality of humor
that Is unintentionally sarcastic. In a dis
cussion of the fine meaning of words the
other day, he said:
"Ambiguity Is a word I always liked. Its
real meaning to a quality that is deemed e.
cm.auy necessary to the clear
men, all well known gourmeta Aniom the standing cf dlnlomatln wntin..
dishes that I ordered, an omelet was served war reports, acts of congress and law pre-
which contained only three fllea. As an ceedinga."
old member of the club. Jealous of Its repu- A
A !ew Veraloa,
A dinner was given recently In Philadel
phia to Lawrence Townsend. the American
minister to Belgium.
Mr. Townssnd talked at thla dinner about
tat Ion as to generosity of portions, this
naturally touched my, pride; it waa. more
over, embarrassing, because, In order te
make an equitable division of the omelet
It was necessary either to divide a flr-a.
New Paco for a Horse.
Judge Parker la responsible for accred
iting a flash of wit to a horse trainer in
a riding academy near the park, where the
Judge occasionally goes In , pursuance of
hla devotion to equestrianism.
It seems that an elderly man had taken
a horse to the place to be broken to "an
old gentleman's pace," an amble, which to
the aged has always been an equestrian
As the tiding master, alter several at
tempts, did not immediately succeed in his
object, the old uian petulantly exclaimed:
"Great Scott, man, do you call this an
"No. sir," was the reply, "I call it a pre
amble." New York Herald. ;
Ho Coulda't Help Bring Ciood.
A well known preacher recently spoke at
a religious service In a Jail. ' lie noticed
that one of the convicts seemed extra
ordinarily Imprrrned. Af'cr the service he
sought hi in out and continued the good
work by remarking: '
"My dear air, I hop you will sroflt by
my remarks Just now and become a new
"Indeed X will," was the reply. "In fact,.
I promise you that I will never commit
another crime, but will lead an exemplary
life ta my dying day."
"Good," suld the dominie, "but are you
sure that you will be able to keep the
"Oh, yes," was the cheerful reply of the
convlot. "I'm In jail for life." Philadelphia
Jadge Herrtek's Story.
Judge D. Cady Herrlck presided at the
dinner of the Albany Chamber of Com
merce recently, and made his first spoecn
since he ran for governor on the demo,
cratlo ticket. Referring to his campaign he
told n story of a whaling ship which was
met upon Its return from a long voyage by
"Got any lie?" asked tbe owner.
"Not a barrel," replied the captain.
"Not a bone."
"What have you got?"
"Well," said the captain, "we've bad a
blamed good sail." Washington Post
A Wllfal Gealas.
Mallbran, the singer, waa an artist who
deserved her success, for her greatest
triumphs csme from the hardest work. Her
voice was not a miracle of nature. It was
gold, says one of her biographers, but It
waa gold that had to be dug from the
earth, smelted and made pliable under the
hammer. One day aho was overheard at
her practising, in gusto of angry apos
trophe. "I'll aee whether I cannot make you obey
me," she was saving to her vylce. "I'll sea
whether you will obey me."
For her the word "impossible" did pot
exist If her voice was out of order, or her
fascinating display of candles.
"Here, children; here's a nickel for each
of you to spend," suJd Uncle Rob.
Gladys ran straight into the candy store,
but Robin thrust his into the depths of bis
"I'm saving my money to buy a bicycle,"
he said, with face aglow.
That evening they were out driving.
"Stand up, Robin, while I fix this scat for
Gladys," said Uncle Rob.
Just at that instant a motor bicycle
came around the corner with a chug, chug,
chug that frightened Prince into a sudden
sturt, and out went poor Rob. Gladys
screamed. Uncle Rob, with a face as white
as chalk, brought the terrified horse to a
standstill and ran back to where Robin lay
In a poor little heap oh, so dreadfully
quiet! To his great relief he saw .the
bright eyes open and heard the bravo little
voice gasping: "I'm not hurt much. Uncle
Not hurt muobl It was hard to believe,
for ho was covered with blood from head to
foot; but wbea Undo Rob snatched him up
and felt of all bis bones he found to his
Joy that none were broken. The child
really waan't hurt seriously, but be was
bruised enough to make a much older boy
cry out. ,
"Why didn't yon oryT Then I ailiM
have known you were alive," said Lnoie
Rob, half fiercely In his relief from that
throat r a fused to obev. ah ancomnllahad
amazing effects by sneer force of will. Per- awful ' wtsn the bleeding was finally
hatB it was fortunate that her career waa stopped.
not a long one. No human powers could
have endured the strain she plaoed habitu
ally upon this gift of hers.
One day she executed a shake upon the
highest notes of her register. She laughed
then at the amazement of her listeners,
"That brute of a note has given me no
end of trouble," said she. "I have been try
ing to get it for the last month. I tried it
while dressing, and while I was doing my
hair. I tried It when I was taking my
walks, and while I was riding. At last I
got hold of It this morning, while I waa
tying my shoestrings."
"And where did you find It, madame?"
"There!" she answered, laughing, and
putting her finger to her forehead. Youth's
One of Sot hern's Jakes.
The elder Snthorn once saw a notice In a
country Inn that a convention of clergymen
was to meet there the next day.
Each clergyman, upon arrival, received a
note, signed with the landlord's name, re
questing him to say grace at dinner, the
signal to be a bell rung In the office. Both
ern had noticed that the landlord aoundeo.
a bell every day aa the guems seated them
selves for dinner. Everything went off to
Sothern's complete satisfaction. The bell
rang, and up roae every clergyman and
began saying grace, then stopped, looking
askance at each other. Some lie nan again,
some sat down and got up again.
The soene for some minutes was one of
confused noiiblng up and down, with mut
terings. The landlord started In
rm ..t, nnd Eotheru put on a ljk of poll
anxle'y nrvl rurprUe. He afterward (
pressed sympathy with thu landlord In his
anger, but left the Inn that day. Rochester
"Men dont cry," said Robin, "I want to
be a man."
That night Uncle Robin asked little Robia
to go camping with him In the real far
away woods and fish and hunt and cook
outdoors and have a real Indian guide.
"I want another man with me," ho said,
with a twinkle in his eye. Berths, E, Bush,
In the Sunbeam.
Louise Morgan Sill, in Harper's Magazlaa,
Last night I had to go to bed
Ail by myself, my motiier said,
Causn I'd buen naughty all day through
She wouldn't klstt me good night, too,
1 didn't want to let her know
How much I cared 'bout that, and so
I dropped my clothes light on the floor
A thing I never did tmlure
And put each stocking lu a siioe
Che Just hules thai ui umiu i do
My hair, or wash my face, or brush
My teeth, and left things In a ouush
All 'round the room; and then 1 look
Her picture, and my fairy-book
hhe gave me on my last birthday
lu June, uid hhi 'oia both awiy.
I put my father's picture right
Up In the middle of the llglo,
Tu show 'em Just the way I foot,
'Cause he said, "Kiss the child, Iuallla,
Ji'in t let her go to bed like till
Without your u.-eral good night kiss,"
But she shook her bead and turned
lr back, and tlien my eyes they burned
.Ike lire. . . . It's been a horrid dayf. . .
And then, of course, I didn't say
My prurers at all, but went to bod '
And wished and wished that I was dead.
Well, I don't know Juat how it was,
Kor I'd ben half-war sleonLnjr 'mnu
astonish- J was so 'pletely tired out
f pom. iy1",,',', ' i: v."-i -l.1 v ,n iv bwi
.... ...... , '- .,,. a v KIIDW
The door moved back and she came through
And put her arm around me so.
And held, a'w hispering very low,
"Mr poor, dear child." aiwd was so sad.
Au4 kissed, mo Iwlue ALri j n glad; - Jt
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