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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 29, 1905)
THE OMAHA ILLUSTRATED BEE. January 29, 1903. High Grade Woo Dress Goods New Spring Goods Are Here Examine our stork and you will find everythlrg that other storew have aa well as thousands of thlnits that they have nnt that are con fined to ua for Omaha. MOHAIRS We have M oh aim In black, white, cream and every shade In plain colors, besides all the New Mix tures, Mercerized Warp. 811k Warp, Linen Warp, etc at. yard, up from 12 50, tl 98, Cflo tL60, $1.26. 11.00. roc and....ou PANAMAS New Panamas In all the new spring effects, plain mannish, etc., R4 y.7d.w...e:... 1.00 Light Weight Tailor Suitings Handsome new German Worsteds, In all the new effects, (( at, yard, U.50 and i-JKJ Voiles and Eolliennes We have all the new mannish effects In Voiles, and all the' new Malangee In Voiles, and all the I Jain shades, etc., also the new In Buedes, crepes, Jacquardn. etc., St, yard, up from II. W, 7 j-1", $1.60, 11.25. 11.00 and ow 2.50 Cravenettes, Aquarellas and Shower Proofs Prtestlev's Cravenettes, R flfl at, yard, $1.25 up to - JV Mneh Shower Froofs, at. yard. 11.00 up to.. M-lnch Aquarelle, the newest Rain proof (roods on the 'JS. market, at, yard ttMi Chiffon Broadcloths We are headquarters for all these Roods at I1.2.1 to $3.00 per yard. Spring samples now ready. Popular Priced Dress Goods Department Closing out all heavy -winter dress good and patterns of all kinds of all wool and silk and wool dress goods. 59c 39c 49c About fiOO patterns that wild from $1.50 to $2.50, will go at yard Clearing out remnants of high grade goods, at, yard, 2i2'2c and About 1,000 heavy wool suiting patterns, that sold from $1.50 to $3.00, yard.... About 500 patterns that sold at $1.00 to $1.08 will go at yard BY THE YARD ON BARGAIN SQUARE 25 pieces of all wool suiting, that sold 7C I 15 P'e of a" woo goods, that sold tip at $1.50 to $3.00, at yard I U 13 pieces of goods that sold up to $1.50 at. yard Closing out all our high grade French flannels and French challies, worth 6c to $1.00, at vard ....... imj to $2.00, will go at yard. A great tunny pieces that sold up to $2.00, at. yard 49c 15c 59c 39c T L-du LLbLlvJS THE RELIABLE STORE. Watch for Oreat Sal on Fancy GooJs Thursday. Monday we will sell ataple notions for less than like goods have ever before been sold. 1 yards Baby Ribbon j I packages Pins for I sihkiIs Thread for , t mools of Bcldlng Bros." 811k 1 ti reaa ror. Great Notion Sale i yards Velveteen Binding ror I balls of Sllko for.. I packages Trowel's or Mlllward'i Needles for 1 sets of Knitting Needloa for... , 2 sets Crochet Hooks for 2 cards of Hump Hooks and Eyes 2 dozen Pearl Buttons 4JC lc lc lc ..4ic ..4ic ..44c . 4ic 4ic 2 Tnltlal Handkerchiefs for 2 seta of best Dress Stays for , 2 balls Crochet Cotton for 2 packages extra quality Envelopes 2 bottles Carter a Ink for Several other 6o articles will be sold 2 for MONDAY SPECIAL New Turnover Collars, worth 15o to 2Ro All go on sale Monday, Cp at. each iJ A beautiful line of 80c Embroidered TEf, Collars, at, each AtJW NEW F.MBROIDERim-Worth So, 10c 20c, 25c, 36c and Boc on sale 91r at yard, Ifio. llUc, lc. "He, Be and... 3" NEW LACES Worth lOo and 20o, 2aC on sal at, yard, fro and w 4ic 4ic 44c 44c 44c 44c Great Clearing Sale in Cloak Department Monday Our sale Saturday was so well attended by eager buyers that we have decided to continue it Monday and offer gTeater values. Remember every Winter Garment in the Cloak Department must and will be sold. Your choice of any Winter Coat In the house, worth $20, $25 and $30, for.. Your cholc of any Coat, -worth up to $12.50, for... Yonr choice of any Winter Buit In for half price. Your choice of Winter Capes, worth $10, $12 and $15, for Your choice of any Chllds' Coat In the sizes 4 to 14 years, worth up to $10, for Your choice of any Chllds' Coat that sold up to $7.50, for Your choice of any Waist that sold as high as $2, for Your choice of any Waist In the house that sold as high as $3, for Y'our choice of any Waist that sold as high as $5, for Yotir choice of Women's Walking Skirts, worth up to $3.08, for 7.50 3.95 the house 2.98 e house, 3.98 2.95 49c 95c 1.49 1.98 Y'our choice of any Walking Skirt that sold for $7.50, at Thousands of bargains In our Skirt Department Monday Morning Specials 8 to 9 Dressing Sacques, worth $1.50 and $2, at 79c and 8:30 to 9:30 $1.50 Wrappers, for New Spring Suits and Coats 775 new Silk Shirtwaist Suits, made especially for Harden Bros. These are all made In the new and most up-to-date styles. In order to Intro duce these to the public Immediately we will give 25 per cent discount on every Silk Shirt Waist Suit sold Monday Morning. Ptkes-$12.S0, $15, $20 up to $35 rsew Covert Jackets, In all the newest styles, at $4.08 and up to 3.98 49c 75c 25.00 China Department ' Flannel Department 15o extra heavy and wide Cotton flannel, qip Fancy Colored Cream Sets, worth from 75c to soc extra soVWnVt'e WooTnanncV, t $3.00 per set your choice Monday, 1f at- ard at J 1 8 Ho Comforter Calico, at, yard Ow Decorated Plates, Cups, Platters, Saucers, Fruits, 1Bot bestmade yard wide Outing Flannel. qc Bakers, Vegetable Dishes, Nappies, C bo AiWooV'EVdMdVwn,' o etc.. at JC at, yard SOC 21.60 full size, all colors, extra soft and heavy flfi- Glassware that Bells regularly from lfl Cotton Bed Blankets to close out pair VOW 25c to 50c, at 1UC All our 23.98 all wool and all colors large size O qq Bed Blankets to close out pair "'"O Fine Center Draft Metal Lamp With Decorated Our ll.BO Honeycomb Bed Spreads, Marseilles pat- v,,, , ) rn ri no terns, extra heavy and full size, with or nun ptandes regular $2.50 to $4.00 flOn without fringe, each VOC . values, at eOl Our ll.OO extra large Crochet Bed Spreads, CQr Marseilles patterns, each fin Unusual Chair Offering Three Good Chairs. Three Popular Prices. Three Reasons Why You Should Avail Yourself of this Chance. These chal-s are all oak with golden finish and are made bv a re'inble Sheboygan Wis., chair factory. The construction Is the best they nave brace arms and cane ceat; the finish Is Unit-class and the styles are new. Prices 75c-1.004.25 The TSc chMr Is similar to cut here' shown The 21.00 and $1.25 chairs are both large, and finer n everv wav the regular prices of these are $1.25, $1.50 nnd $1.75. By taking advantage of this sale you can buy them for 75c, $1.00 and $1.25. We are enabled to make this reduction on account of having secured from the factory all the chairs of these numbers which they carried In stock. As we bought a large quantity we got a very low price. The 75c chahr Is No. 12 tnO; the $1.00 chair is No. 448; the $1.75 chair Is No. S8. These numbers are on the bot tom of each chair. Tou should buy now because you can save money. Tou should buy now because oak chairs at these prices are a rare thing. You should buy now because you will not get such a chance again. High Grade Wash Goods In the Main Wash Goods Department Prenoti ginghams, O Sfi tbo and V. JU VOILES AND MOIIAIR LUSTRES. We have the new spring Voile de Lino, made to sell at 16a tfin Monday sale, at The new Voile re Regelne, made to sell at 36o on sale 1QC Arnold's celebrated Oreclan Voiles, advertised In all fashion Journals, sUso Arnold's mohair lustre. FRENCH ORGANDIES. Oroe Romans, French Organdies. 70 per cent silk, superb color- CQn Ings and patterns, only J Bhearur Iouth and Cle CXOc nrnnillt, n t J Jt Other organdies at iibc liH: and 15c NEW MADRAS, PERCALES, OINOHAMS. New Imported Scotch CXIQr Madras OVW New Imported Madras, 36a, Qp 25c and tTrW New French Percales and printed Cambrics, yard wide, 12Ar regular lo goods sfcjw GINGHAMS AND CHAMPRATS. S.ono pieces of French and domeetlo gingham s. Amoskeag, fast colors, tin Or el y lea iot Tolle du Nord. the most celebrated American gingham 191- made Anderson's Scotch glng- f Cr hams, lo and ,,JW NSW WHITE WAI8TTNGS. The new light-weight fabrics tot spring l!i(V-Jacqimrds and all over patterns, finely nier- 1Qft cerlsed 6(c, 8oc, 25o and '"v Cleslng out all the $1.00 JSp heavy mercerised, at Closing out all the t9c and f En T5o heavy mercerised, at liJw New Arellne cloths, Perlni lawna, French lawns, batistes, India linens, chiffons. mmiNsellnt'H, eto., at very papular prlixs. LININGS AND LINING SILKS. We are headquarters for nil klnils of linings and tailor' findings. i all the fashion Journals tor Sampson's lining silk. Linens Linens Linens Linens Linens LAST DAY OF OUR BIG JANUARY LINEN SALE Mnndr w will Dlace on our line nankins to matcni oivinea uo inio same goods can be handled In this Liot 1 All our Herman ana jrmn bleached and unnleached tauie linen that sold up to $1.50 7QC per yard Monday, per yd.'w Lot 3 All our German and Irish bleached and unbleached table linen that sold up to $1.;S C() per yard at. yard u s Lot t All our German and Irish table linen that sold up to ACin d -w n counters $1,000 worm or tame aamasK (many or in patterns nav four lots, and for one day we will sell ubom at lower prices than country. For instance: $100 per yard at, yar Lot 4 All our German and IrUh table linen that sold up AOf to 75o per yard at, yard..."-''' 10c fine bleached sheeting, 01r JVi yards wi le at, yard.... 3-'Ho extra heavy blenched sheet ing, 2'i yards wldu 9sp at, yard AOW 10c fine soft finish cambric, yard wide at, yard 73c 15c fine Imperial long doth, r, No. 90 at. yard vC iPo ready-to-u pillow tir cases at J tbo ready-to-use bleaohed seamiest sheets, slse 47 JC 40c mercerized eatoeu. black and yalrdCOl!-. l2jC 86c silk Moussellne de Sole C ,-, ail shades at, yard IC'U I I if We are receiving large shipments of new silks every day, which enables us to j I I t show the most complete Hues of all the latest styles and -weaves of 10U5 silks, at 69c . OPTICAL DEPARTMENT ...Another Cut Price Sale.... Framelcss Kyeglasses Gold Tlated Mountings, worth $3.00, at 98c. Steel Spectacles, worth $1.50, at 49c Great Shoe Sale The Ultra $3.50 Shoe for Women at $2.00 We have decided to drop five lines of THE ULTRA $3.50 lace, patent calf and vlcl kid, on account of the sizes being badly broken and to clear them up quickly, O ff have marked them at the absurdly low price per pair ..VJJ Never before sold below the advertised price $3.50. Brooks Bros.' $3.00, $3.50 and $k.00 Shoes, $2A8 Brooks. Bros., makers of the best shoes manufactured In Rochester, N. Y., hare gone out of business. We were Omaha agents and carried a lame and varied stork of these shoes in order to close them out quickly, will for the next three y Afi 98c 98c 98c 98c 98c 69c 69c 69c days sell all these $3, $3.50 and $4 shoes In vlcl kid and patent calf at, choice ' a very low price Monday we start the season at these quotations: New plain Mesnallncs, the latest finish for a handsome spring dress 20 Inches worth $1.00 dollar a yard, at, per yard ine new Kijah silk in u full line of now colors, thirty inches wide Monday f r at Ilayden's for, per yard I J Oriental silk suiting, the latest novelty and most choice, silk for a suit come in all 1 no shades, 1'7 inches wide, and can only be found at Ilayden's, for. per yard .l.JQ A large line of Klaioua silks In the new patterns thirty inches wide Monday, A f ior, per yam -...tZ Color Taffetas, excellent finish, 10 inches wide, good for all purposes Monday a bar- A f gain for, per yard M fjQ Fancy silk suitings In every choice patterns and shadings, for this season's suits and O P waists, 19 and 21 inches wide Monday for, per yard 'QDC Specials in Black Taffetas 19 Inches wide regular 75o quality i(jr, yura 24 Inches wlde.regular fo quality uir, yard 49c 59c 27 Inches wide reeular $1.10 quality. e7-j for. yard iOC 79c $1.10 inches wide regular $1.10 quality for. yard $6 Inches wide regular $1.50 quality, for, yard Specials in Black Peau de Soie 19 Inches wide regular $1.00 quality, Monday fkCr for. yard UvL 20 Inches wide regular $1.19 quality, Monday Ufln for, yard OVU 27 Inches wide regular $1.10 quality, Monday ""eye-, for, yard .. Ow 27 Inches wide regular $1.25 quality, Monday' s for, yard I.U 36 Inches wide regular $1.1S quality, Monday flrt for, yard fJt SAMPLE CROWN SHOES for men, worth $2.50 and $3.00; for three CQ days, per pair ALL 60O THREE POINT BLIP- OQf, 20c PERS during this sale WOMEN'S 35C CARPET SLIP PERS during thla sale LADIES' SAMPLE AND REGULAR STOCK SHOES-worth up to ( $3.60. In this sale I.OV ALL $1.50 AND $1.39 FUR TRIM MED JULIETS during this sale MEN'S WOMEN'S AND MISSES' VET CARPET SOLE WARM LINED SLIPPERS, kt JERSEY LEGGINGS For women, and children; reduction sale price 49c, 39c and .98c VEL- 29c misses 29c MEN'S $1.60 SATIN CALF LACE SHOES, at , BOYS' $1.50 SATIN CALF LACE SHOES, at YOUTH'S $1.60 BATIN CALF LACE SHOES, at MISSES' $1 .60 VICI AND DONGO LA LACS SHOES, at WOMEN'S $1.78 AND $1,59 VICI KID LACE SHOES, at LITTLE MTSN'S $1.00 SATIN CALF LACE SHOES CHILD'S $1.00 SAMPLE- SHOES, lace or button, hand turned soles., CHILD'S $1.25 SAMPLE SHOES, lace, hand-turned soles 20 Off on All Stetson Double Sole Shoes We are agents for the celebrated STETSON. CROSSETT and JOHN MITCHELL Shoes for men and the ULTRA and G ROVER Shoes for ladies. Extra help during this sale. Isv wfa)m(g Hardware, Stoves and Housefurnishings 100 cases Granite Ware on sale Monday Articles ranging from 20c to 35c eacn will stll at this sale for 10c. Kota partial list of articles below of about 60 different articles. Windsor Dippers. . . . ."TTT 10c 2-quart Mixing Bowl 10c lYeservIng Kettles lOc Soup Dishes 10c Wash Basins 10c Deep Pie Plates 10c Sauce Puns 10c Large Drinking Cups 10c Large Soup Ladles 10c 3-quart Pudding Pans 10c Groceries 10-lb. sacks best kiln dried Cornmeal loo Pure Rye Flour, per sack 574c Fancy High Patent Min . neaota Flour, sack. .$1.19 6 pounds best hand-picked Navy Beans 19a 5 lbs, good Japan Rlce.l9o 6 lbs. best Pearl Tapioca, Sago, Barley or Farina 19c T pounds best k'!n-drled Oatmeal 15e 10 bars best Laundry Soap 2fo Sapollo, per bar 5o Pearilne, etc., per pkg. 2c 8 bars Wool Soap lOo Castile Soap, per cake., 3c Quart cans Golden Table Syrup 70 We cannot delay the excavatorsStock must be sold regardless of cost. 1-pound Jars Pure Fruit Jam 7Ho The best Soda, Oyster, Butter or Milk Crackers per pound 640 All regular 12o and 15o Cookies, this sale thre pounds for 2So 3-lb. cans Solid Packed Tomatoes 7tto S-lb cans Hominy, Squash or Sauer Kraut 7Hc 3-lb cans Boston Baked Beans 7Hv 2-lb. cans Sweet Sugar Corn 7o 8-lb. cans Early June Sifted Peaa 7H3 2-lb cans Fancy Wax, String or Lima Beans at 7Vo CALIFORNIA DRIED FRUIT SALE. Choice California Prunes, per pound 4o Fancy Santa Clara Prunes, pound 6c Fancy 3 Crown Muscatol Raisins, pound 6o Fancy 4 Crown Muscatel Raisins, pound 6c Choice California Peaches, pound 7Ho Fency Mulr Peaches, per pound 8Ho Choice Cleaned Currants, per pound 7Ho Fancy Evaporated Rasp berries, pound 23o Fancy Pitted Plums, por pound IZHo Fancy California Apri cots, pound lOo Fancy Baxtlett Pears per pound 12o Groceries Fancy Seeded Raisins, per package no The largest fresh fruit department In the west The car of Fancy High land Navel Oranges for this week's sale, was the finest yet received. Regular 85o4i)c Navels elsewhere our price, per dozen 26a Regular 3oo Navels elne where our price doz.2oo Regular 2oo Navels ele where our price, per dozen 17a Regular 20o Navels else whereour price, doi. loo Regular 17Ho Navels else whereour price, do.12o Pure Colorado White Clover Honey, rack.. Mo Large Ripe Bunanaa, per dozen 1-0 Bright and Entertaining Stories Gathered for the Little People The liom that West to School. ERO was a large Newfoundland dog. He belonged to a boy who lived In a small village la Maine. Nero was very fond of his young master. When the spring term o: N school began Nero always went with Gil bert to the sohoolhouse door. He would then lie down on the steps or on the grass In the yard and wait patiently for school to clow at noon. Ha was nloe and goodnatured, and when the children came out to play at re cess, he would get up and Join In their frol ics, and he seemed to enjoy It all aa much as any of them. - It was very pleasant to lie and sleep out In the soft grass In the shade of the apple trees, through the spring, and even through the first weeks of autumn. But when chilly winds began to blow, and the frost had withered the leaves, Nero found It rather cold work to wait at the achoolhouse hour after hour. He bore It quite well, however, until there came a blustering day when the snow fell steadily. That day. about 10 o'clock. Nero pushed open the entry door, which was slightly ajar, walked In and scratched gently at the Inner door. The teacher heard the sound and opened the door to see what made It. Nero wagged his tall, shivering and gave a pleading whine, as If he would Ilk to say, "Please let me coma in and get warm." Yes. yoa may, If you will be a good dog." the teacher answered. Nero walked in past her and lay down near the big stove, giving a deep sigh of content. After that day, Nero always came In with the scholars when the bell rang, and took Ilia place by the stove In a serious and dig nified manner, that might well have been copied by many of the pupils. One morning In April, aa Nero Uy sunning himself on the plana, he noticed the school children passing with their books apd slates. He sprang up. ran Into the house, snlfling and whining at Gilbert's coat and cap. that still bung In the hall. Then, as If he had a sudden wild idea that he might find Gilbert at the school libuse. he bounded off down the street as fast as he could. The same teacher was again teaching there, and she warmly welcomed Nero when he scratched as usual at the door. He cum In, and at one settled down fjulctly In his old place, after casting a glance around .at the children's places In vain. Gilbert was not there. But Nero had. It seemed, made up his tnlad to bo a regular attendant at school. He came every day, rain or shine. He soon new the meaning of the bells, and when ie children rose to march out at recess, he, , was up in a moment, ana eiooa wav- llig hi plumy tall until the last one had nased out. Then he rushed out after them, isurn iiko any gooo-naiurea, tun-ieving fhoolboy. Kor years Nero came to sohoot He never I sued a day until he grew too old and reble; and even when his poor old legs rfused to carry him beyond the plana. nmiM lie there and wistfully gaze after ren as they passed- ad girls of that school hare never forgotten their good and noble school mate. They often speak of Nero, the dog that went to school. Selected. Grandmother Knew. The lore of grandmothers exceeds even tliat of mothers, for they have the experi ence of two generations instead of one. A oertaln Massachusetts grandmother has grandchildren In Honolulu, and last win ter, musing over their dally llfo, she said to her daughter at home: "I must knit those children some mit tens." "Mittens, mother!" cried the young woman. "Mittens for that climate? When are they going to wear them?" "I can't help the climate," said the grand mother, placidly. "Climate lias nothing to do with It- All children like mittens, and all children should have them. I shall take tbeni up tomorrow." She did take them, up, knit and bound them off, and sent thorn to Honolulu. She was Justified by the ovent, for the children's mother wrote her on the hottest day of the year: "I must tell you, though in this heat I have hardly the energy to hold my pen, that, although we grown people are torpid under the infliction of the weather, the children have demanded their mittens, and are parading up and down, wearing them and very little besides. No matter how high, the mercury climbs. It Is evident that those mittens are bound to be an unfailing Joy." Youth's Companion. When a Reindeer Is Angry. We were forced to wait three days after it had stopped snowing for a crust to form so that we could travel again '(In Alaska). It was with many misgivings that we began the last half of the journey, since the snow was now very deep and the danger of our sinking Into drifts was great. To add to our general feeling of fear, the reindeer behaved very badly and were ex ceedingly unruly. The wind had moderated Somewhat, but It was still Intensely cold. We had traveled half the day without any serious mishap and were beginning to forget our feara at starting out, when we sped merrily dovwi a mountainside, sing ing and hallooing at the top of our voicee, and ran into a gulch and stuck there. The songs stopped In our throats and we sprang to our feet to sink waist deep In the drifts that hod entrapped us. Every movement of our bodies sank us deeper In the snowdrifts, and the Infuriated reindeer, finding themselves caught In the banked-up snow almost to their haunches, turned upon us and would have pawed us to death but for the forethought of Oosllk, who, seeing our danger, siu-aug forward and hoisting the overturned pulks In his strong arms, brought them down over our heads and shoulders and pinned us out of sight In the mow. We heard the hoofs of Uncle Ben beating on the pulk's side as he pawed up the snow In his efforts to get at us, and If we hud not kept the pulk over us he would have tossed It In the nlr with one sweep of his horns and would still have bad bis bout with us. In which case wo should have been helpless and completely at his mercy. For the first time we had occasion to see how fierce an angry reindeer can be. When he was convinced that he could not reach us. Uncle Ben turned upon OosiUk, and we heard the Eskimo shouting and clubbing the deer as he ran in and out of the pulks In a swift circle, pursued by the bellowing reindeer. We spent an exciting half hour under the pulks, with the hoofs of the deer rattling like hall on the frozen boards, and then the unuuual commotion ceased all at onco, for the reindeer had found a lichen bed. In a Jiffy they were pawing up the snow In their hurry to get at the succulent moss, and we were forgotten. Amallk and Ooslllk lifted the pulks from our heads and dug us up out of the snow and set us on our feet. By the time the reindeer had eaten themselves Into a pas sable humor Amallk and Ooslllk led them back to the pulks. We had four hours of traveling before we came In sight of the corral that had sent us the reindeer from Eaton Station. As soon as the deer scented the well known corral they quickened their strides so that we reached the station before It was quite dark, and crawled from the sleds with a deep feeling of relief, glad beyond meas ure to be at home after the perils of our protracted Journey. St. Nicholas. Why Aobln Wnt Oamplnar. Uncle Rob looked down at his small namesak:. Ho was wondering if he really was big enough to take. "Some boys of 17 are babies yet, and of course to have that kind along would be no end of trouble," be said. "I'll see." "I always walk to school with Gladys," Robin was saying, he trotted along. "You see, there are some real rough boys on Peck street and It's safer to have me with her." Uncle Rob nodded his head, but said nothing. Just then they came to the most Some Tersely Told Tales Both Grim and Gay A Maaenlar Christina. ENATOR BLACKBURN of Ken tucky tells of a good old Metho dist minister In his state in the nlAnu, Aavm whA m,aa a "tnnAil. kf"fll lar Christian." "One day," says the senator, "after the parson bad found it necesaary to administer tlstlo punishment to several young toughs who persisted' In disturbing the meeting at one of the churches which he served, one of his flock, noted as something of a hard hitter himself, got up In meeting and said: " 'It la a solemn duty of this here congre gation to stand by Parson Johnson. He does not seek trouble, but he will not show the white feather when trouble is forced In his way. I believe that, unrestrained by divine grace. Parson Johnson can whip any man In Kentucky. The Lord Is with him. Let us pray,' "New York Tribune. S Clnb Life. W. 8. Burgess, the yacht designer, was talking at Murblehead about club life. "Odd and amazing are the complaints that the bouse committee of clubs receive," he said. "I remember, at a club to which I nice bit of carving, as you must concede or to forego a fly myself. I beg to suggest that in future when an omelet Is ordered for four persons It should be served1 with either (a) four flies, er (b) no flies at all." Boston Herald. $ A Good Remedy, In the schools of a Connecticut town measures were recently taken to test the children's eyesight As the doctor finished each school he gave the principal a list of pupils whose eyes needed, attention, and requested him to notify the children's parents to that effect. One boy brought home to his father this note from the principal: "Mr. . Dear Sir: It becomes my duty to Inform you that your son shows decided indications of astigmatism, and his case is one that should be attended to without delay." The next day the father sent the following answer: "Dear Sir: Whip It out of him. Yours truly." New York Tribune. his experiences abroad. Among other things be said: "In Belgium, as a rule, when English Is spoken to you. It Is excellent English. Now and then, though, you come upon some very curious mistakes. "I attended a muslcale one day at an. English woman's apartment. An admira ble amateur on the violin was the guest of honor. The man pla ed and 1 played, for the encores were persistent, till finally bo got a little Ured. He wished to say politely to his hostess that lie was too weary to play any longer, and the words he used were these: "Madam, dcr ghost ies- ready, but der meat lss feeble.' "Kansas City Journal. taaltty of Amblgalty. Neither comic opera lokea nor fables it. onoe belonged, a letter of complaint about slang form any part of George Ado's ordl- tne restaurant that was sent In by a mil llonalre. This letter was so Interesting that I took a copy of It. Here Is the copy. I ll read it from my notebook." Mr. Burgeaa then read: "Gentlemen: I have the honor to inform you that I lunched at the club thla after noon, and hud as my guests throe gentle- jr vuuversauon. Me is, however, rather given to indulging In a quality of humor that Is unintentionally sarcastic. In a dis cussion of the fine meaning of words the other day, he said: "Ambiguity Is a word I always liked. Its real meaning to a quality that is deemed e. cm.auy necessary to the clear Ven ' men, all well known gourmeta Aniom the standing cf dlnlomatln wntin.. dishes that I ordered, an omelet was served war reports, acts of congress and law pre- which contained only three fllea. As an ceedinga." old member of the club. Jealous of Its repu- A A !ew Veraloa, A dinner was given recently In Philadel phia to Lawrence Townsend. the American minister to Belgium. Mr. Townssnd talked at thla dinner about tat Ion as to generosity of portions, this naturally touched my, pride; it waa. more over, embarrassing, because, In order te make an equitable division of the omelet It was necessary either to divide a flr-a. New Paco for a Horse. Judge Parker la responsible for accred iting a flash of wit to a horse trainer in a riding academy near the park, where the Judge occasionally goes In , pursuance of hla devotion to equestrianism. It seems that an elderly man had taken a horse to the place to be broken to "an old gentleman's pace," an amble, which to the aged has always been an equestrian beatitude. ' As the tiding master, alter several at tempts, did not immediately succeed in his object, the old uian petulantly exclaimed: "Great Scott, man, do you call this an amble?" "No. sir," was the reply, "I call it a pre amble." New York Herald. ; Ho Coulda't Help Bring Ciood. A well known preacher recently spoke at a religious service In a Jail. ' lie noticed that one of the convicts seemed extra ordinarily Imprrrned. Af'cr the service he sought hi in out and continued the good work by remarking: ' "My dear air, I hop you will sroflt by my remarks Just now and become a new man." "Indeed X will," was the reply. "In fact,. I promise you that I will never commit another crime, but will lead an exemplary life ta my dying day." "Good," suld the dominie, "but are you sure that you will be able to keep the promlAO?" "Oh, yes," was the cheerful reply of the convlot. "I'm In jail for life." Philadelphia Telegraph. Jadge Herrtek's Story. Judge D. Cady Herrlck presided at the dinner of the Albany Chamber of Com merce recently, and made his first spoecn since he ran for governor on the demo, cratlo ticket. Referring to his campaign he told n story of a whaling ship which was met upon Its return from a long voyage by the owner. "Got any lie?" asked tbe owner. "Not a barrel," replied the captain. "Any boner "Not a bone." "What have you got?" "Well," said the captain, "we've bad a blamed good sail." Washington Post A Wllfal Gealas. Mallbran, the singer, waa an artist who deserved her success, for her greatest triumphs csme from the hardest work. Her voice was not a miracle of nature. It was gold, says one of her biographers, but It waa gold that had to be dug from the earth, smelted and made pliable under the hammer. One day aho was overheard at her practising, in gusto of angry apos trophe. "I'll aee whether I cannot make you obey me," she was saving to her vylce. "I'll sea whether you will obey me." For her the word "impossible" did pot exist If her voice was out of order, or her fascinating display of candles. "Here, children; here's a nickel for each of you to spend," suJd Uncle Rob. Gladys ran straight into the candy store, but Robin thrust his into the depths of bis pocket, "I'm saving my money to buy a bicycle," he said, with face aglow. That evening they were out driving. "Stand up, Robin, while I fix this scat for Gladys," said Uncle Rob. Just at that instant a motor bicycle came around the corner with a chug, chug, chug that frightened Prince into a sudden sturt, and out went poor Rob. Gladys screamed. Uncle Rob, with a face as white as chalk, brought the terrified horse to a standstill and ran back to where Robin lay In a poor little heap oh, so dreadfully quiet! To his great relief he saw .the bright eyes open and heard the bravo little voice gasping: "I'm not hurt much. Uncle Rob." Not hurt muobl It was hard to believe, for ho was covered with blood from head to foot; but wbea Undo Rob snatched him up and felt of all bis bones he found to his Joy that none were broken. The child really waan't hurt seriously, but be was bruised enough to make a much older boy cry out. , "Why didn't yon oryT Then I ailiM have known you were alive," said Lnoie Rob, half fiercely In his relief from that throat r a fused to obev. ah ancomnllahad amazing effects by sneer force of will. Per- awful ' wtsn the bleeding was finally hatB it was fortunate that her career waa stopped. not a long one. No human powers could have endured the strain she plaoed habitu ally upon this gift of hers. One day she executed a shake upon the highest notes of her register. She laughed then at the amazement of her listeners, "That brute of a note has given me no end of trouble," said she. "I have been try ing to get it for the last month. I tried it while dressing, and while I was doing my hair. I tried It when I was taking my walks, and while I was riding. At last I got hold of It this morning, while I waa tying my shoestrings." "And where did you find It, madame?" "There!" she answered, laughing, and putting her finger to her forehead. Youth's Companion . One of Sot hern's Jakes. The elder Snthorn once saw a notice In a country Inn that a convention of clergymen was to meet there the next day. Each clergyman, upon arrival, received a note, signed with the landlord's name, re questing him to say grace at dinner, the signal to be a bell rung In the office. Both ern had noticed that the landlord aoundeo. a bell every day aa the guems seated them selves for dinner. Everything went off to Sothern's complete satisfaction. The bell rang, and up roae every clergyman and began saying grace, then stopped, looking askance at each other. Some lie nan again, some sat down and got up again. The soene for some minutes was one of confused noiiblng up and down, with mut terings. The landlord started In rm ..t, nnd Eotheru put on a ljk of poll anxle'y nrvl rurprUe. He afterward ( pressed sympathy with thu landlord In his anger, but left the Inn that day. Rochester Herald. "Men dont cry," said Robin, "I want to be a man." That night Uncle Robin asked little Robia to go camping with him In the real far away woods and fish and hunt and cook outdoors and have a real Indian guide. "I want another man with me," ho said, with a twinkle in his eye. Berths, E, Bush, In the Sunbeam. Tbo Kiss, Louise Morgan Sill, in Harper's Magazlaa, Last night I had to go to bed Ail by myself, my motiier said, Causn I'd buen naughty all day through She wouldn't klstt me good night, too, 1 didn't want to let her know How much I cared 'bout that, and so I dropped my clothes light on the floor A thing I never did tmlure And put each stocking lu a siioe Che Just hules thai ui umiu i do My hair, or wash my face, or brush My teeth, and left things In a ouush All 'round the room; and then 1 look Her picture, and my fairy-book hhe gave me on my last birthday lu June, uid hhi 'oia both awiy. I put my father's picture right Up In the middle of the llglo, Tu show 'em Just the way I foot, 'Cause he said, "Kiss the child, Iuallla, Ji'in t let her go to bed like till Without your u.-eral good night kiss," But she shook her bead and turned lr back, and tlien my eyes they burned .Ike lire. . . . It's been a horrid dayf. . . And then, of course, I didn't say My prurers at all, but went to bod ' And wished and wished that I was dead. Well, I don't know Juat how it was, Kor I'd ben half-war sleonLnjr 'mnu astonish- J was so 'pletely tired out f pom. iy1",,',', ' i: v."-i -l.1 v ,n iv bwi .... ...... , '- .,,. a v KIIDW The door moved back and she came through And put her arm around me so. And held, a'w hispering very low, "Mr poor, dear child." aiwd was so sad. Au4 kissed, mo Iwlue ALri j n glad; - Jt r I.VV r r u 'I 1 f I n (1 r