March 27, 190i.
THE ILLUSTRATED DEE.
13
What Happens When Two Trains Meet on One Track
CRKTH PIRKMHN nAYING ON TIIK RVR.NINC1 WRECKAGE. Photo by Smith &
Ucnnett, Crete, Nel)..
f "
Wl I KIIH TIIK WIIIS'K PIMM) IP TUB 1IIGIIBHT Dioto by Smith & Itcnnett,
Cre tc, Neb.
Women as They Were
Fifty Years Ago
IE
Abigail
to the
nom do
did not
IN WRITING of men ami
half a century ago Miss
15. Podge, bettor known
reading public under her
plunie, "Gall Hamilton,'
herniate to tell of the frailties of cither
Bex. "Men are strong; they do things and
don't mind It," admits this vigorous woman
writer. "They can open doors In the damp
est weather. They can unstrap trunks
without breaking a blood vessel, turn keys
In n moment which women have lost their
tempers and lamed their fingers over for
half an hour; look down precipices and not
be dizzy. You may strike them
with all your might on the cheat and it
doesn't hurt them In the least (1 nuan If
you are a woman). They never grow ner
vous and cry. They go upstairs three at
a time. They put one hand on a four-rail
fence and leap It without touching. In
short, they do everything easily which
women try to do and cannot.
"Moreover," continues this commentator,
"men ore so 'easy to get along with.' They
re conveniently blind und benevo'ent.
Women criticise you, not unjustly, but re
lentlessly. They Judge you In detail, men
only In the whole. If your dress Is neat,
well-fitting and well-timed, men will not
notice It, except a few man milliners nnd
a few others who ought to be. If you will
only sit still, hold tip your head and speak
when you are spoken to, you can be very
comfortable. I do not mean that men can
not and do not appreciate female brilliancy,
but If you are a good listener and In the
right receptive mood you can spend an
hour very pleasuntly without It.
"Rut a woman tlnds out In the first thre
minutes that the fringe on your dress is
not a match. In four she has discovered
that the silk of your sleeves Is frayed at
the edge. In five that the binding on tha
heel of your boot is worn out. l!y tha
aixth she ha satisfactorily ascertained,
what she suspected the first moment she
set her eye on you.' that you trimmed
your bonnet yourself. The seventh assures
her that your collar Is only 'Imitation,' and
when you part, at the end of ten minutes,
the lias calculated with tolerable accuracy
the cost of your dress, has leveled her men
tal eyeglass at all your innocent liit'e sub
terfuges nnd knows to a dead certainty
your past history, present circumstances
and future prospects. Well, what harm If
ehe does?
"None In particular. It Is only lielnir
ptretched on the rack a little while. Yoa
have no reason to be ashamed a.nd you fire
not ashamed. Your boots are only begin
ning to he shabby, and we nil know tho
transitory' nature of galloon. Your fringe
Is too dark, but you ransacked the city and
did your best, angels could do no more.
You trimmed your bonnet yourself and
saved f-2. which was jtist what you In
tended to do. Your lace Is not real, accord
ing to the cant of the shopkeepers, but It
Is real real cotton, real linen, real si'k, or
whatever the material may be, and yoa
never pretended It was llonlton or point.
"Hut If men, In their strength and cour
age nnd Independence, are enviable, men
In their gentleness are irresistible," con
cludes the writer. "You expect gentleness
la weiman. It is their attribute and char
acteristic. You do net admire Its presence
so much as you deplore or condemn its ab
sence. Rut manly tenderness has a pecu
liar charm and you meet it everywhere
In the house and by the wayside. In e It y
and country, under breudeloth arid hrime
spun. "You may travel from one end of the
Munlry to the other und meet not o.-.ly
civility, but the mnut cordial and consid
erate kindness. You may be as ugly as It
Is possible for virtue to be', and tired and
travel-stalne'd and stupid, and your neigh
bor ef a day will show you ull the little
attentions you could claim from a father
or breither or husband. Women
would better Improve the rights the-y have
before going mad after olhers they know
not of. If men will be so good as to do
the law-making and stock-jobbing und
bribing and quarreling and stump-speaking,
I shall le greatly obliged to them.
Am I enthusiastic over this involuntary
eiutgushing of the stream of kliiilnefs,
which flows so continually from men to
usward? I have a right to be. A t a lon
of men loyal, not to grace, beauty, -mag-nillcenee,
but to womankind, to the highest
Impulses of human nature, to the love ele
ment of the universe. Is a thing to be en
thusiastic about."
Their Reason
A writer In IJpplncott's tells of a young
teacher who had taken special pains to Im
plant a knowledge of I'nlted States history,
who could but feel that much good seed
had fallen on stony gremnd when at the
final examination the ciue-stion. "What
character do you like Itest, and why?"
brought forth the following astonishing
replies:
"Andrew Jackson, because he whipped
the Uritlsh with an old hickory."
"Grant, who waa elected president twice
nnd around the world once."
"I like Monroe for doetrin' the people
and Jackson, standing on a stone wall,
and fell denil."
"Lincoln, who was shot and killed stand
ing in a booth, anil died savins' 'Jefferson
survives, 1 inn e-ontcnted.' "
"Ie Koto, who waded ill Hie Mississippi
up to his elbows and there found his
grave."
"(Md General Putnnni, who left his ox
and his ass in the Held ami went and licit
the liritish."
"The reeloiibtful John Paul Jones. hi -cause
he said: 'We'll bint tlieni ltritlsh
or bust,' ar.il Hun did it."
'Straight-Front Man"
"T 'angling Vert as I H'istinted In Assorts
Sizes of Avoirdupois" was the tuple which
Miss Klizabeth A. C. White diseours -d
upon at tin- dresjimake-r.V on vent Ion in
New York the other diy, to the cdith-atloti
of a host of women and a lone man. "It's
a few tips- I'm going to give you.1' an
nounced Miss White at the start, "on
standing, sitting and walking.
"l'lrst. I'll (how yoa." she exclaimed
rnergeth ally, at the same time dragging
out an unwilling model, whose fairy form
certainly tipped the scales at more than
2(i0 pounds. "Now, sit," commanded the
Indomitable president. "There, you see
h"r neck gets thick and stout, and win-re's
tho llgure? She needs a back to that
chair, the way she's sitting. And hnik at
he-r f ee't ! When a fat woman sits down,
square eiut goes her limbs twelve or fif
teen Inches apart. They don't help her
figure, (let up. Now, pli-k up your skirl
high in the bak ami sit elown so the
hips uro well back. Now that woman
has some' Intelligence. She didn't hav
before.
"Now, evi-ry woman that's sheirt can
look tall If she only stands right. Most
women don't have any iKH-k; It's all front.
Their real intelligence Is stupefied. Com
mence to use your Intelligence, stiffen
your knees, keep your feet together, and
you'll have a stunning figure'."
The lone man was the point of attack
ami the centi r of attraction. lie was a
reporter for nr. aM"rmn paper, and h
ventured to the platform to ask somo
questions.
"Just wh it I want -a man:" exclaimed
Mis Wl.ltc. the demons! rater. "Now. I'll
show you how to straighten out a man."
Tin- reporti-r stammered and remembere-d
another assignment.
"It won't lake but a minute," argued
Misx White. "And tin ii you'll know how
to look re. illy smart. There Isn't over eme
rn ui in r.ml hiie lu Ne w York with a really
smatt look. Now. this man has a cupid
form -short and round and too full
here -"
The reporter turned purple.
"Now, 11 you were pushed up so "
e-onllnin-d Miss White', "you'd look an Ini h
or two taller and ten years younger."
The re-peirter eiuli-avored to retreat.
"Just a minute'," smiled Miss White.
"Now. you know e very man enight to have
a straight front Now-he-e-ls together,
knii'S straight, ehest out, stomach In-ob,
nifile than that so "
The reporter wilted. "I'll come back
tomorrow," he promised faintly.
"Petter let me lit you today," persisted
Mlsn Wtiite. "I inn give- you that smart
loeik." Tho audii m e giggliMl und the re
porter looke'd foolish.
"Now stand or. 'he ball of your feet."
Just tin n the re-p irte r got courage and
t Bca ped.
r
MMM-i
r
Mayden's
Easter
Millinery
Our unrivalled showing,
the elegance of which will
again demonstrate most
emphatically the fact that
Hayden's styles are far
superior to those shown
elsewhere.
OUR PATTERN HATS
AT TEN DOLLARS
Have No Equal Any
where irv the Union.
