0
TIIE OMATTA DAILY PEE: WEDNESDAY, FEBKTJAIir 19, 1002.
Tiie omAiia Daily Beel
E. ROSE WATER, EDITOR.
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STATEMENT OP CIRCULATION.
0tate of Nebraska, Douglas County, sa.1
George B. Tssohuck. secretary ot The Bea
Fuonsning Company, being duly sworn,
ays that the actual number of full and
complete Coplua of The Daily. Morning,
Evening and Sunday Bee printed durlntf
the month of January, UH was a fol
lows;
1.. ao.stjo
..ao.Kio
I .....JJO.OVO
4 ao.no
i 80,106
ao.-too
7 80,800
S0.3MO
9 80,170
10 .80,130
11 80.8IM)
12 80,480
13 30,470
14 80,100
U v 80,070
Total ...
It 80,180
17 JW.loO
U
1
20
21
22
23
24
26
26.....
27
28
29
30
31
.80, WW
...80.3AO
...80,100
...80,430
...ao.-tuo
...80,800
.. .80,180
.. .80,000
...80,400
.. .81,100
... 80,050
...83,0441
...808V
...80, BOO
...41,03
less unsold and returned copies..
Net total sales 3a.OT
Net daily average SO.OtfT
GEO. B. TZ8CHUCK.
Subscribed In my presence and sworn 10
netore ma this 1st day or aeoruary, a. u.,
IDOi. M. B. HUNGATE,
(.Seal) Notary Public.
We are all for expansion now expan
sion of the area of sidewalks cleared of
enow and Ice.
Even tbe patient democratic mule ob
jects to the load Congressman Wheeler
ought to put upon him.
The pending meeting of the city coun
cil protracted by repeated recesses
awaiting the outcome of tax levy lltiga
tiou Is likely to go down Into history as
the long session. .
The World-Herald flashes another
headline upon the public, "Ransom Paid
No Results." We protest against such
local allusions la connection with those
Bulgarian bandits. ,Wi
Statistics show that the bank deposits
of Nebraska amount to $70.16 for each
jK-rson in the state. Few Ncbraskans
are complaining these days about the
financial situation.
Eastern papers are not likely to say
anything for a fey days about western
blizzards. Tbey have snow enough
piled up on the sidewalks to keep them
busy for a few days.
If that whispered offer to buy the
auditorium site at an advance of $120,000
to $25,000 over the purchase price is not
a bluff the auditorium directory will do
well to call it without delay. '
A recent sale calls attention to the
fact that Nebraska possesses the largest
herd of pure bred Hereford cattle In the
.world. Nebraska Is right in the front
.when it comes to breeding high grade
animals. ,
Colonel Bryan is going to Columbus,
O- to confer with Colonel Kllbourn, late
democratic candidate for governor in
that state. T. J. Phillips of Ottumwa,
la., should not be overlooked in the call
ing list.
A compressed air plant for Omaha is
said to be a possibility. With so many
hot air plants working overtime in this
community the compressed ' air pro
moters need not expect to have the Held
to themselves.
Delegates to the ' woman's suffrage
convention rtiortPtl that the women of
Spanish-American countries were
apathetic in iwlltlcal matters. If the
.women iu those countries were as active
as the wen
happen.
no telling what might
It Is greatly to be feared that the taste
of high-class band concerts at low-priced
admlsslou given our people by succes
sive concert festivals has seriously Im
paired the ability of concert masters to
command full prices for band music no
matter bow good or how popular.
A convention of musicians has de
nounced "Yankee Itoodle" and several
other national airs as musical trash. No
one pretends that "Yankee Doodle" Is a
classic, but for all that every American
steps a little bit higher when tbe baud
strikes up the lively air. ,
An oflicer of tbe German army has
been sentenced to six years imprison
ment for killing a man in a duel. A
consistent application of the same rem
edy will soon induce German officers to
seek some more modern method of
poulticing injuries to their dignity.
Having managed to worry along with
out a gymnasium and special physical
culture training up to this time, the
High school pupils will doubtless be able
ta survive a llttlo longer without them.
The gymnasium will come in' due time
as soon as the school board catches up
better with the school finances.
PBOTXCT nil RVRAL MAIL DELIVERY.
The rurai mall delivery, even in the
brief time it has been under trial, bas
proved such a success that tbe people
look to congress to protect it, howso
ever threatened. If congress considers
the best interests of the service it will
reject the recommendation of the house
postofflce committee for the abolition of
the carrier system as at present con
stituted to make way for a return to
the old plan of tar route contracts.
The pernicious Influence which the
contract scheme would have upon rural
mail delivery can be readily foreseen.
The contractor would, of necessity, be
accorded the privilege of subletting his
contract, and the selection of carriers
according to their qualifications and fit
ness would be taken entirely out of the
control of the postofflce authorities. If
the requirement were enforced, as now,
that the carrier be a resident along tbe
route which he covers the Invariable
tendency would be toward either a com
bination of tbe local bidders for the star
route contract, with resulting excessive
prices or cut-throat competition,
prompted by personal Jealousy that
would reduce the cost below its actual
value, with a corresponding lowering of
the quality of tbe service.
How vitally Nebraska is interested in
this question win be understood when
it is known that this state already has
nearly 400 regular and substitute rural
mall carriers, who were placed under
the civil service rules by an order which
went into effect the first of the present
month, although the entire service is yet
in Its infancy. The resurrection of the
star, route contract system would not
only destroy tbe effect of the civil serv
ice rule promulgated by the president,
but Wjould, in all probability, throw the
greater part of the carriers out of em
ployment altogether.
Rural, mall delivery was welcomed
largely because it promised to do away
with, tbe remnants of the star routes and
the people will not sit idly by while it is
subverted for an extension of the very
contract system it was expected to cur-
tall. The rural mail delivery Is in es
sence different only In degree from the
city mail delivery, but we can easily
imagine the outcry that would be raised
were It proposed to district all of our
cities and let the contract to carry the
mail to the lowest bidder. Yet, should
the present scheme succeed, we might
expect this proposition as a logical se
quence. According to advices from Washington
members of congress who were disposed
to look favorably upon the postofflce
committee's recommendation are having
their eyes opened to tbe pernicious con
sequences with which It would be ac
companied.. It ought not to have a
single vote recorded for It when it
comes up for action.
THE POPULIST DILEMMA IS KANSAS.
Kansas populists are to 'decide defi
nitely .this week, through a delegate con
vention which has been called. for that
purpose, upon giving up their party or
ganization and party name and packing
as many of their followers as they can
carry with them over into the demo
cratic camp. The most reliable In
formation from the seat of the disturb
ance is to the effect that no serious diffi
culty will be encountered in thus Anally
consummating the long-cherished plan
of democracy to swallow completely its
former associates In the so-called "re
form movement." . Should the present
program be carried out the populist
party In Kansas will soon have gone
the way of the self-styled silver repub
licans, who disbanded more than a year
ago.
While this political assignment bas
been forced in Kansas lis a, result of a
new ballot law. Which, prohibits the
printing , of candidates' names more than
once upon the official ballot It is of
special ' interest to Nebraska because
tbe allied forces of reform in the two
states have largely traveled tbe same
path. The recent convening of demo
cratic editors to form an organization
for the promotion of democratic su
premacy in the fusion field in Nebraska
affords conclusive proof that the more
far-sighted democratic leaders In this
state are looking forward to and pre
paring for the time when the populiBts
of Nebraska will have to meet the ques
tion whether their organization shall be
maintained, in view of the dissolution of
the populist organization in surround
lng states and In the national field.
Against this open move for amalgama
tlon. or rather for the extinction of the
populists, the populist press in Nebraska
is already entering vigorous objection.
Their protests, coupled with the slightly
different conditions In Nebraska, may
constrain the democrats to go slower
and work more under cover.
In tbe meantime no harm will be done
by keeping an eye on Kansas.
' ' A SIMPLE SOLUTION. "
A simple solution of the question of
canal routes is In tbe. passage of tbe
Spooner amendment to the house canal
bill. This amendment proposes to en
trust to the president the duty of cut
ting a waterway along ' the' Panama
route if a clear title can be secured
from the French company for the sum
they ask for their property and If the
necessary concessions can be obtained
from Colombia. Otherwise the canal
shall be . constructed on tbe Nicaragua
route.
It would seem that this should be sat
Isfactory to the Nicaragua advocates,
whose claims have been very greatly
weakened by tbe. report of the canal
commission favorable to Panama. They
assert that the French company -can
not give a clear title. Why not let
this matter be investigated by Presl
dent Roosevelt who can certainly be
trusted to do so, as well as to make
terms with Colombia, if that govern
ment is disposed to be fair and reason
able, and of this there is at least the
assurance of its minister to this coun
try. Regarding the ability of the Pan
uma company to give a clear title Ad
mlral Walker has expressed the opinion
that there can be no doubt about It
It will not be very difficult to ascertain
whether or not a clear title can be had
and there Is no reason why the presi
dent should not be authorized to do
this.
Colombia, It seems safe to assume,
will not be unreasonably exacting In
the matter of concessions. ' In a re
cently published statement the Colom
bian minister to the United States said
that his country would seek only a fair
equivalent for privileges granted. Ho
states that Colombia Is desirous of offer
ing every possible facility to the gov
ernment of tbe United States for the
completion of the Panama canal, "not
only because she fully appreciates the
Importance of this work to the com
merce of the world, but because, fol
lowing her traditional policy, she is anx
ious to draw closer the friendly rela
tions that have always existed between
the two countries."
Let this matter be left to the deter
mination of President' Roosevelt, who
cun be depended upon to see that Amer
ican interests are properly cared for.
Such uncompromising Nicaragua advo
cates aa Senator Morgan, who is by
sufferance chairman of the senate com
mittee on Interoceanlc canals, should
not be 'permitted to longer delay this
most Important enterprise.
TAX REDUCTION IS TBE SENATE.
What will be done by the senate with
the war tax reduction bill is a subject
of speculation and probably nothing
definite will be known until the measure
comes before that body. Recent Wash
ington advices have stated that there
will be considerable opposition to cut
ting off the whole $77,000,000 of revenue
and that this opposition will come from
those who do not wish to see the sur
plus entirely wiped out Among these,
It is stated, are the senators. who are
anxious that a large concession be made
in the tariff in Cuban sugar and to
bacco. How numerous these senators
are does not at present appear. There
is opposition in the senate to the re
moval of the beer and tea taxes, more
particularly the tax on tea. A canvass
of senatorial opinion seems to warrant
the view that the duty on tea will be
retained and the tax on beer will be cut
In two. This would save $12,000,000 of
revenue on tea and $8,000,000 on beer,
making the revenue reduction $57,000,-
000 instend of $77,000,000.
. There Is undoubtedly a very consider
able public sentiment favorable to re
taining part of the beer tax, for the
reason that tbe removal of this tax
would be of no advantage to the re
tall dealer or the consumer. Only the
brewers would get the benefit it is
urged. As to the duty on tea the im
porters are . divided, one favoring its
retention and others opposing It, while
the wholesale grocers are practically
unanimous In favoring the removal of
the duty. When tbe question of Impos
ing a duty on tea was before congress
it was said by the importers that the
effect of levying a duty would be bene
ficial in inducing the importation of a
lx'tter quality of that article. It is now
held by some of the importers that
such has not been the case, while those
who favor retention of the duty insist
that there bas been Improvement in tbe
quality of tea coming into the country
and that the duty bas not been felt by
consumers. With the trade thus di
vided senators feel more at liberty to
act as expediency may dictate and it Is
therefore thought to be quite probable
that the tea duty will be retained. As
to the beer tax of course the brewing
interest is a unit 1'or its removal and
this influence will be strongly and prob
ably effectively exerted. ,
As we have already said regarding tb
republican senators, we believe they
will be disposed to regard tbe popular
demand for the removal - of the war
taxes, as their party was pledged to do
by its last national convention. A few
changes may be made in the bouse
measure, but it is safe to say that in
the main it .will be accepted by the
senate. So far as tbe question of giv
ing tariff concessions to Cuban products
,s concerned, that should have no bear
ing on the matter. The first duty of
congress Is to relieve the American peo
ple of taxation as far aa this can be
done with safety to tne national
revenue. When this has been done It
can be determined what our govern
ment can do for Cuban interest, with
a aue regara ior tuo or our own
imople. ,
A combination proposing to finance
tbe street railway lines of New York
contemplates borrowing $150,000,000.
It bas not been so many years since only
the strongest governments would think
of floating a loan of such dimensions,
but corporation consolidations have
grown to such proportions that they
almost cast governmental operations in
the shade. Nothing but industrial con
ditions of tbe most promising sort would
permit tbe financing of such gigantic
enterprises and in no other country in
the world would tbe problem of rapid
transit for tbe people of one city be
considered of Importance enough to war
rant the expenditure of so much money.
Tbe state land ' commissioner an
nounces 22,000 acres of school land In
Nebraska are now available for lease.
This Is a large amount of land, but
compared with the amount not leased a
few years ago It Is a mere trifle. An
other thing worthy of note Is the fact
that the state Is receiving for this land
much larger rentals than the rate pro
posed lu the government land-leasing
bill now before congress, and the pas
sage of that bill would mean a consider
able loss of revenue to tbe school fund,
for no one would give more for state
land than for that leased of the general
government
An inquisitive contributor of the Lin
coin Journal propounds In that paper
the question why tbe city council of
Lincoln rushed through a franchise for
the benefit of a certain corporation In a
single evening. Is it possible they do
such things in tbe good city of Lincoln
without so much as a protest from the
Journal, that Is always so eager to de
nounce the Omaha council for every
move of questionable advisability? How
Is It that our vigilant watchman down
at Lincoln can always see black specks
In Omaha while overlooking black spots
in Lincoln?
Omaha grocers have been invited to
walk Into the parlor of a co-operative
oil company about to be launched In the
shadow of the Standard Oil works at
Cleveland. Omaha grocers have had
their eyeteeth cut and will walk Into
no parlor until they assure themselves
that there Is no trick furniture Installed
in it ;
Tbe National Bird.
Baltimore American.
If eggs keep going up it will be a very
short time before tbe hen challenges the
Eagle to prove his title as the national bird.
Babble) Days of Copper.
Brooklyn Eagle.
There must be a lot of rubber in the stock
of Amalgamated Copper. Such bounding
and shrinkages have not been seen since
the bubble days ot South Sea companies.
Let It Oe ait That.
Globe-Democrat -,
The truth about the attitude of foreign
powers during the war between the United
States and Spain is that all wers careful to
avoid an overt act that could offend this
country.
Horn and Hominy.
Chicago Tribune.
If Prince Henry sees in the crowd that
greets him on his arrival In this country a
fierce-looking man with a chip on Ms
shoulder he will know it Is Windy Wheeler
ot Faducah.
Deserting; the "Plain People."
Indianapolis Journal.
Ex-Senator Pattlgrew, so long a cham
pion of the people. Is now declaring that
President Hill's railroad merger is all right.
but Mr. Pettlgrew has made a pile of money
In stocks by taking Mr. Hill's advice.
Woes ot the Poor Bank Wrecker.
Washington Post.
The gentleman who touched off that De
troit bank Is seriously ill with nervous
prostration and the vulgar depositors who
are clamoring for their money and disturb
ing, the poor man ought to be ashamed of
themselves. The bank wrecker Is able to
sit up and talk like a martyr. He even
goes so far as to intimate that he will
consent to serve one year in prison If they
can find a Judge heartless enough to send
him there.
Boasjestlon for a Swap.
Army and Navy Journal.
The Philippines will probably be worth
more to England than they ever will be to
us and Canada and the British West Indies
are of little value now to the home country,
except as a menace to the United States,
and a possible source of future differences
between two countries which should ever
be at peace, but which can only establish
peace upon enduring foundations by eon'
slderlng the material interests of one an
other. Now that wo have an equivalent to
offer, let us. make a trade for British pos
sessions within, jthe purview of the Monroe
doctrine. - ,,,, , .
Jtoctrin of Fair Trade.
Minneapolis Times.
If Governor .Cummins correctly reflects
the sentiment ot his party in Iowa, fair
trade is good republican doctrine there and
tariff revision Is regarded as a road there
unto. In his Lincoln day address at Lin
coin he set forth a great truth In few
words when ha declared that consumers
have a better right to competition than pro
ducera have to protection and therefore
when a manufacturing Interest bas de
stroyed home, competition and become a
monopoly it should enjoy a protective bonus
no longer. Tbe proposition is a logical one
and western republicans In large numbers
recognize Its force and Its application to
present conditions.
A Hope for the Trusts.
United States Investor.
At the start the trust movement looked
like, a card house, which might collapse at
any moment, scattering ruin on all sides.
Today there Is some ground for the hope
that the water In the trusts will be ejected
by the promoters themselves, before it has
had a chance to get In its mischievous
work. Some ot the trusts have already
begun to reduce their capitalizations, and
if this tendency should become general, ths
evil outcome of the Industrial combine
movement would no doubt be greatly modi-1
fled. Mora rational views regarding the
capitalization of the industrial plant of the
United States have begun to prevail, and
this fact may very likely not be without a
marked effect upon the temper of the In
vesting public. Apart from Its present
over-capitalization, the industrial situation
is such as to arouse the liveliest expecta
tions of continued prosperity.
Native Novels la Favor.
Buffalo Express.
What was the average character of the
books published laat year? Of the 8,141
books issued in America, how many deserve
to live? The lists show that 1901 was not
remarkable for the number ot Its im
portant original works. Biography was the
strongest clasa of the year, and even the
number of Important biographies was not
large. The truth seems to be that, although
there are mora readers than ever before,
those readers are wasting a good part of
their time on the most ephemeral of lit
erature. The remarkable thing about ths
history of Action in 1901 was not the num
ber of great novels that appeared, but the
hundreds of thousands of copies of certain
books sold. The pleesantest feature of
the situation is the fact that the cheap
British novel appears to ba yielding its
place to the native novel, which, II no
better than tbe other. Is at least Amer
lean.
Prenaatare Rejolelaa.
Portland Oregonlan.
General Dewet Is the king of runners, at
when brought to bay he is the prince of
fighters. With the inability of the Boer
to feel fatigue, the Boer's Intrepidity In
the presence of danger and the Boer'
stubbornness In the face of defeat, he is
moreover, at homo on the veldt or among
the Kopjes. And, whether afoot or
mounted, herding with cattle as a protec
tlon and a decoy, or In bivouao with his
tattered troops, be has proved himself
mora than a match for Britain's ablest
generals by successfully eluding capture
and striking unexpected blows. His time
will come. The persistent Briton has no
Intention of abandoning the chasa and the
intrepid quarry will eventually ba caught
or killed, but Lord Kitchener should take
counsel ot experience and not report
either of these events again until the Boer
general has been delivered, dead or alive,
into his hands. Laughter is unseemly in
the presence of bitter strife and of prams
tura rejoicing England has had enough.
WHO WAS OCR miEUD IN IfWS?
Springfield (Mass.) Republican: The ul-
tlmate fact which is of all the most Im
portant to remember, is that the ostenta
tious British claim upon our gratitude be
cause of exceptional and signal service to
tbs United States In preventing or dis
couraging a European coalition against this
country, is mere trumpery.
Cleveland Plain Dealer: The amusing
feature of this four-year-old controversy Is
the seriousness with which the two parties
evidently imagine that the United States Is
taking a deep Interest in the question
whether the British "Codlln" or the German
Short" was the real friend of tbe American
Little Nell" in the spring of 1898.
Indianapolis Journal: The latest state
ment from the British government regard
ing Lord Pauncefote's proposal of April 14,
1898, relative to Intervention by the powers,
Is that it was made on bis own Initia
tive and without instructions from his gov
ernment That being the case, It seems to
be "up to" Lord Pauncefote to rise for a
personal explanation. Probably the truth
is he made the proposition at ths earnest
solicitation ot the minister of Austria-Hungary.
Detroit Free Press: It has been repre
sented to the people of the United States
In a thousand different ways that this coun
try really owed a debt of gratitude to
Great Britain, and that but for her we
should have faced a European coalition In
the spring of 1898. It has been hammered
Into our ears that we ought to he willing
to make Important sacrifices of our own
national Interests to pay this debt Now
that the curtain has been lifted the debt
has disappeared.
Washington Post: Foreign envoys pro
tested to the Stats department against a
misrepresentation so Injurious, so flagrantly
and Impudently false. The newspapers,
however, were worked, as usual. Millions
of honest men In this country and in Eng
land believed It all devoutly. There was
gush about "blood Is thicker than water;"
there were hands across the sea. Jo Cham
berlain went around, speecbmaklng, full
of references to "this compact, this under
standing, this alliance, if you please." On
this side the country rang i with fatuous
and ignorant laudation of England. Our
markets were opened to her for the pur
chase of war material to crush the South
African republics. A high officer of our
army sat at a New York banquet, where
two dead queens and the present king ot
England were toasted before any one
thought of the president of the . United
States. The British embassy at this cap
ital was hailed as tbe social arbiter for
Americans. Adulation, toadyism, servile
rapture on every hand, praise and solici
tation on every lip. And what now? The
truth has been told at last. We know that
England plotted our downfall inj98. Does
the love feaat outlast even this revelation
or do we recover our national dignity that
dignity so long trailed In the mire ot folly
and humiliation?
PERSONAL NOTES.
General William D. Blackmar of Boston
possesses the chair in which General Grant
sat while writing out the articles of capitu
lation at Appomattox.
Governor Stone of Pennsylvania said at
eonvontlon of the school directors of the
state that he thought their office should be
made a salaried one. The Keystone state
already pays out $5,500,000 every year for
the maintenance of its public schools.
Dr. Robert J. Irvine, physician In charge
of the Sing Sing hospital, advocates an In
determinate sentence for criminals, so that
those who show no evidence of reform need
not be released. He says the present sys
tern sends prisoners out worse morally than
when they go In.
Hughes Le Roux, the distinguished French
author. Journalist and explorer,' who has
Just arrived in this country, says that he
has promised his son that he shall come
here to live and make his way. M. Le Roux
will remain in this country three months
and deliver ninety-three lectures.
Governor Crane and council of Massa
chusetts have decided on March 17 as the
day for the dedication of the Dorchester
Heights monument. So St. Patrick's day
and Evacuation day may again easily be
'properly" observed, as so often heretofore,
without protest and partially at public ex
pense. ,
Lieutenant Edwin R. Stuart of the corps
of engineers, on duty at West Point, carries
off the honors this year of the military
service Institution. To him has been
awarded the prize gold medal, a life mem
bershlp In the institution, and the sum of
$100 for his essay, the subject being "Dis
appearing Guns."
John H. Davis, father of the new march
loncss of Dufferln and Ava, started in bust
ness In Philadelphia as a banker and
broker, under tbe firm name ot Glendlnnlng,
Davis ft Armory. Later the two latter
members of the firm went to New York,
where they have been in business ever
since. Mr.' Davis is well known in New
York and English society.
Charles Clinton, an old soldier and
prominent resident of Avondale, O., has
presented that city with a handsome Lin
coln statute. . It was executed by W,
Granville Hastings and consists ' of
two figures, one a statue of Lincoln, seven
feet ten Inches In height, and the other a
female figure of Fame Inscribing the name
of Lincoln on ths tablet of Immortals.
Alexander R. Shepherd, former governor
of Washington, who expended practically all
his own fortune years ago In the develop
ment of the national capital along far
sighted lines and who then became Inter
ested in extensive silver mines in Mexico,
Is to return to Washington to live. He
will again make that city hla home as soon
as his present large business Interests can
be arranged in a satisfactory manner.
PARTY LINK TE LK PHONES.
Great Institution tor Spreadlaa Do
mestic Troable.
Chicago Chronicle.
The special council committee Investigat
ing the telephone service declares that the
party line system must be abolished.
Every patron of the party line telephone
will concur In this implied blessing, pro
vided it be not vouchsafed at an Increased
coat and worse service.
The party line wire has afforded the most
fertile means of wire-pulling during current
controversy In various women's organiza
tions whose excitements have taken up
more than an equitable proportion of public
attention in this city for some weeks.
The party line has enabled promiscuous
neighborhoods to Indulge in uniform fa
miliarity with the affairs ot one another's
butchers, bakers and candlestick makers.
Profound family secrets have been un
consciously and In many cases. It may be
feared, disastrously divulged to sometimes
innocent, but oftener guilty, listeners at the
other receivers on the party Una. The
party line has broken ancient friendships,
aggravated ancient enmities and promoted
an unprecedented measure of profanity,
articulate and Inarticulate, especially when
Interlocked voices confuse one another on
the party line.
The busy man, frenzied in a balked ef
fort to get an Instantaneous reply to an Im
portant query, bas found in the fixity of
tenure by another subscriber on his party
wire a wholly unsuspected fountain of im
piety In himself. '
The party wire ought to go if a cheaper
and better device can be provided as a
substitute.
BITS OF WASHINGTON LIFB.
Etchlaas of People and F.veats at the
National Capital.
"As it seems to be quits the thing for
N'ebraskans visiting Washington to tell
grasshopper stories, I will add my little
mite to the crop which has already been
sprung," said Judge W. M. Robertson ot
Norfolk, Neb., to the Washington Tost.
"My story happens to be true, not inti
mating, of course, that soma of the others
have been otherwise. At the same time,
my story will appear, from its title, to be
anything but s correct statement of facts.
I am going to tell you how tbe grasshoppers
ate up the salaries of the state officers in
Nebraska.
"Now, as a matter of fact," continued
Judge Robertson, "that action on the In
sects' or, I should say, the animals'
part. Is not nearly as paradoxical as one
would suppose, for ths grasshoppers really
are responsible for the low salaries still
paid our officials. You see, it was this way:
Nebraska was admitted to ths union In
1867, but In 1874 it became necessary to
frame a new constitution. We went down
to the constitutional convention prepared
to do all sorts of things. One crowd, to
which I belonged, favored, among other
things, pretty fair salaries for state officers.
The other gang favored low salaries.
"We were a rather frontier community
in those days, but some of us could look
ahead and see where the officers' duties
were going to be much greater, socially,
as well aa officially. Tbe opposition pre
sented a provision that all tha state officers
be paid $2,600 per annum, fiat, with two
exceptions, the latter to receive $2,000. A
vigorous fight followed, la which the con
tention was made that in view of ths bad
crops, brought about by the visit of grass
hoppers, the people could not afford to pay
more. The dread of the plague was still
so fresh In so many minds that our gang
lost, and the salaries were fixed as I have
stated.
"Since then it has always been Impos
sible to raise them. Whenever a move
ment looking toward this end has been
started In the legislature, some old popu
list member has risen from the depths ot
his chair and aaid: Wal, $2,600 has always
been ernough so fur, and I'm thlnkln' it'll
always be ernough. Thar's plenty of good
men ready to take the job at thet figure.'
So there you are. If the grasshoppers
haven't eaten up the salaries, what has?"
While the president and Mrs. Roosevelt
were In Groton attending Theodore Junior
during his critical Illness the other Roose
velt children had the run of the White
House.. Miss Alice. Roosevelt and her aunt,
Mies Carew, were there to hold them In,
but were not very successful. Bright and
early on ths morning the president started
for Groton Archibald appeared In the public
reception room and announced to the White
House employes that If they would accom
pany him to the red room he would show
them how Kubellk acted the day he gave
a recital at the White House. No one ac
cepted the invitation, but shortly from the
red room came a series of the most fearful
crashes ever given out by a tortured piano.
When Pinckney reached the spot ha found
Archie using a tennis racket for a violin
and at the same time bringing forth (mat
ing sounds from the piano with such por
tions of his anatomy as were available for
pounding the keys. Shortly- afterward
Kermtt demanded of Assistant Secretary
Loeb that tbe horses be ordered out so
that he could hitch them to hla fire engine.
"Yes," said Speaker Henderson to a cor
respondent, "a good many people ask ma
how I lost my leg. Generally I tell them,
but I always think of tbe story of the
Iowan who had both legs cut off by a buzz-
saw. One day he was riding In a railroad
train and an old lady who sat across the
aisle from him stared at his stumps pretty
hard. Finally she said:
" 'Pardon me, sir, but will you tell me
how you lost your legs?'
" 'No, I won't,' the legless man replied.
Tbe old lady sighed and settled back in
ber sest. Pretty soon she began staring
again and, unable to conceal her curiosity,
she pleaded:
" 'I wUh you would tell me how you
lost your legs.' t
"The man relented.
" 'Well,' he said, 'I'll tell you if you will
promise not to ask any more questions.
Now, mind, you can't ask another question.'
" 'I promise,' said ths old lady In a
quiver of excitement.
" 'Well,' said the legless man, 'I had
them chawed off.' "
"Not often do I have an opportunity to
get newspaper fellows on a gridiron," re
marked Senator Tillman of South Carolina,
"but I have got two of them on the fire
now and I propose to give them a good
roasting."
The "pitchfork" senator then went on to
explain, reports the Washington Post, that
through the influence of bis bead political
rival. Senator McLaurln, the president has
nominated the editor of a South Carolina
paper for postmaster at Greenville. The
editor referred to, while professing to be a
democrat, has for some time past de
nounced Senator Tillman as only a southern
editor can when he has a grievance against
a political opponent. When be was making
his attacks upon Senator Tillman, he had
no Idea that he would become a presidential
appointee under a republican administra
tion. '
. Senator Tillman has secured conies ot
all of the objectlonal articles published In
I tbe Greenville paper and invoked senatorial
courtesy to defeat the nomination on per
sonal grounds. The owner of ths paper has
filed a statement to tbe effect that he is
responsible for the articles complained of
and appeals to the republican senators not
No cures to reoort.
of testing, nothing to give you confi- Qj)
dence but talk, all talk. That's the v
truth about nearly all cough medicines.
But there's a record of 60 years of cures . ',
back of Ayer's Cherry Pectoral. And phy
sicians endorse it, prescribe it for colds,
bronchitis, and coughs of all kinds. -4 Prob
ably your own doctor does. Ask' him. He
knows all about it has the formulaVf
I know from personal experience that Ayer's Cherry f set oral la the f
best medicine in the world for quickly breakihg up a heavy cold that has J
settled on the lungs." D. C. SaEDKKia. Pine Hill, N. V.
IU., Mb. ll.M. . C. AYT Ca, Lewett, Mass.
to punish tbe editor. Senator Tillman d
Clares that he has succeeded-In holding up
the nomination and In the meantime he has
bad the supreme satisfaction of having tea
of his enemies pleading to him for mercy.
KVLOOY HABIT JX t'ONQRKSS.
Storied F.loqnenre and Animated
Barala ot Poetry.
Kansas City Star.
Ths Congressional Record Is a periodical
of such a unique character that there
should be no surprise at the statement that
it Is at its happiest when most doleful.
Members of congress can become eloquent
over a bill for a fed oral building at Taka
hasrt, they can rise to heights of Imag
inative oratory on the Declaration of Inde
pendence, but they never really sound the
depths of pathos or soar to the summits of
sublimity until they set out to eulogise the
character of some deceased colleague. When
the house gives itself up to memorial serv
ices there Is an onion in every ere.
On most occasions congressmen . abstain
from versification, but at memorial services
sll rules are waived and a "Dictionary ot
Quotations" Is at every member's elbow.
Among the most effective eulogies of the
last session was one over a member from
Indiana. "Mr. Speaker," began his grlet
strlcken colleague Impressively, "can storied
urn of animated bust back to its mansion
call ths fleeting breath?'" The speaker's
answer was nov inserted In ths Record. A
recent service was prollfla In 'Terse. A
member from Pennsylvania began by lug
ging In:
Theirs not to make reply,
Theirs not to reason why,
Theirs but to do or die.
This familiar bit was followed , by the
stanza of a hymn:
One by one our days are weaning.
From things earthly go toward
Gorgeous harvest days of gleaning, '
In the full track of the Lord.
Another speaker took up the strain.
"There Is one thing, Mr. , Speaker, that Is
certain, and that Is death, while there is
nothing more uncertain than life."
A flash of lightning, a break of the wave,
Man passes from life to his rest In the
grave.
Nobody denied this and another colleague
declared that death "brought terror and
dismay," and asked, "Who pan take his
place?" Somebody else then assayed this
flight: "While green grass-will cover his
grave, blue skies bend o'er H and sweet
birds sing near It, yet greener than the grass,
fairer than the skies, aweeter than the birds
will be hla fragrant memory." This, It
seems is a stock piece of oratory on such
occasions. Another member, coming in
later, offered the same thing aa "a flower
plucked from tbe garden of. eloquence."
Two members could not forbear repeating:
His life was gentle and the elements
So mlx'd in him that nature might stand up
And sov to all the world, "This waa a
rami." ' '
At the last session two ardent eulogists
Inserted their speeches under ' "leave to
print." When their pathos appeared in the
Record they were distressed to find the ad
dresses tdenti6al. The Washington eulogy
vender had unfortunately sold the same
speech to both congressmen under the Im
pression that It waa to be used on two
separate occasions.' ' '
PLEASANTLY PUT.
Philadelphia Press: Scrimp You don't
seem to bother much about the future.
Llghtart No, that never worries me un
til it becomes the present. .
Somervtlle Journal: Polly Can you name
all the presidents in order? '
Cholly No, but I can give you a list of a
dozen new engagements that haven't been
announced aa yet.
Judge: Crawford Have they enlarged
their circle of acquaintances alnrn lhav
moved into their big house?
Crabehaw Oh, no. Since they;, became
rich they don't know half as many people
aa they used to.
Washington Btari "I am afraid that your
boy lacks determination," said the neigh
bor. !'.
"That's where you wrong him," answered
Farmer Corntossel. "I never saw anybody
as determined not to work as Josh is."
Chicago Tribune: "There's a fellow some
where downtown that looks exactly like
me. I am taken for htm a dozen times a
day."
"That's funny."
"Yes, but It Un't as funny as It used to
be. I've found out he owes a small bill at
nearly every cigar store in town."
Bomerville Journal: The man who wants
to give up something during Lent might
begin by giving up his seat In the street
car to any lady that he sees standing.
Detroit Free Press: Lode I always give
the prettiest embroidered things I do to
my momer.
Mi
arte That Is kind and thoughtful In
you.
Luole Yes; then I can borrow them,
you know.
Philadelphia Press: Callerrd like to in
terest you in a new Insurance scheme that
Business Man Get out I I'm tired talk
ing to insurance men.
Caller Ah! that's Just It. Our scheme is
to Insure you against the visits of insur
ance men.
Judge: Mrs. Jones What's become of
that silk smoking Jacket you gave your
husband for his birthday T
Mrs, Smith Oh, I had to make that over
Into a sofa pillow. He actually- wanted to
sit around and smoke .in It.
IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT.
. Somer villa Journal. -. . . ..,-
Often In dreams I think of thee. ' '
When sleep has overcome my will
Thy well known form I seem to see
And through my being runs a thrill.
I strive for freedom from thy thrall,
But all my struggle is In vain.
Again, and once again, I fall,
And so the night is passed in pain.
Often In dreams I think of thee.
Especially those nights when I
Before retiring, heedlessly.
Have over-much indulged ' in pie.
Then I am sure to see thee near.
And oh! thy advent anguish brings!
In dead of night thy wrath I fear.
Thou horse with eighteen legs and wings,
no lone record
V 1