Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, July 08, 1900, PART I, Page 10, Image 10

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THE OMAHA DAILY BEE: SUNDAY, JTTIiY 8, 1000.
Don't Mdt akut meats for lunchconl
4 U , When we can supply you
and WOrry at these low prices. Akll
line of canned meats, sardines, fish, etc, at
economical prices
Potted Ham -A delicious and sav
ory incut just tho thinir for aundwlohco
prico tomorrow, Oc and '
Libby's Veal Loaf -large cans just tho
W. R. BENNETT CO.
1502 AND 1512 CAPITOL AVE.
READQUARTERS for cool things to eat and wear Economical, money saving pecv
pie your attention! We are making offers to you for tomorrow that will astonish
you Prices that cannot be duplicated goods above reproach first-class in every re
Hsvc You a crc ts a curc or it
r , nn ,t Bennett's Mixed Can-
Sweet Tooth? dy 7c pct pound,
Assorted Candy, half pound boxes Q0
per box only :x L
Assorted Stick Candy, per 1 On
pound only liwC
Fresh Salted Peanuts, per -t fiS
pound only ...IOC
Ice Cream Soda, per glass, g
only OL
Ice Cream in packages take it OCtn
with yon ut half plnU, 7ci pints, 13c; jL
quarts
thing for hot wcathor It's a dainty
juicy, Bwoot moat for luncheon
price tomorrow
20c
spect we can save you money Bennett's guarantee is back of these offers goods
as represented or money refunded, 2 2 2
vs"
.svC
-sV
Here is
your
chance special sale in fish
ing rods tomorrowl A lot
of high grade Lancewood
fishing rods, worth from
$3.00 to $6.00 each, will be
placed on sale tomorrow for
the economical
purchas
$1.98
er, at.
Watch should be
Repairing anat
at least once
every two years.
The balance of all modern
watches makes 18,000 beats
per hour. So you see what a
busy body the balance wheel
of your watch is. It needs
oiling and cleaning regularly
We do this work quickly and
carefully.
Our charges
for oiling and M L.
cleaning
Our charges
for main- M " 1 .
.prlng.: X t-W
Our charges f ELCi
for bulunco 1
staff T1 '
Our charges
for crystals I C
2oo to .sHW
We use best material, .j
j j All work guaranteed.
SHORT STORIES OF THE DAY
Superintendent of Mails Oraraor Tells a
lew of His Troubles.
REPORTER'S SENSATIONAL STORY
Incident UlimtrntliiK tlir I'rrvorslty
of Woman, Ilvluteil ly r Smoker
MnUrr Ilcnlrii Out hr
' Hook Agents.
J. E. Cramer, nuponntetident of the malls
at tho Omaha postofllce, fell Into a reminis
cent mood tho other day and began talking
of times when postal business of the state
of Nebraska was not as woll regulated as 11
ls today.
"You know tho effort of the department Is
to bavo the names of offices In the same
state as dissimilar as possible and this Is
especially so in regard to the form of the
written charaoters. When I first went Into
the service there was a town In eastern
Nebraska known an Howard. Later a post
office called Harvard was established. When
mall was started to one town It was as liable
to roach the other a to to delivered at Its
proper destination. Finally this condition
ibecame unbearable and the good citizens of
Howard, in ordor to get a naroo which could
sot be mistaken petitioned the department
to name their office Podunk. The office com
piled with tho request and for several years
Podunk was a Nebraska postofllce. It has
been changed or discontinued since, for It Is
no longer In the guide.
"At present tho postal clerks ore having
trouble with Oenevo and Oenoa. As printed
they look nothing alike, but when good
writers become a llttlo earn Ires tbero Is
much difficulty experienced In distinguish
ing the places on an envelope. Fremont and
Fairmont, while they look little alike In
ordinary writing have a bad habit of get
ting mixed. To those best acquainted with
tba acrvlca it is a aune for wonder that
more mall does not miscarry. Tho Ameri
can pirbllo seems to think that plain writ
ing ls unnecesaary and even fair scribes
pay llttlo attention to tho way In which
they address a letter. At the same time
many mull clcrkB bavo a habit of passing
"nlxlcti" along the Una to tho next man
and the malls are now carrying hundreds
of letters which should have boon sent dl
rectly to the dead letter office.
"It would surprlso you to boo tho number
of letters which are addrersed In cipher
Wo have no means of knowing for whom
they are Intended and generally these lctterf
BO directly to the dead lottcr office. Onco
In awhile through mero idleness a clerk win
endeavor to locate one of these addressed
nnd sometimes ho succeeds. When such a
letter Is delivered a local paper will print
a story about It and then a lot of people
who should have better bciiso will mall a lot
of letters of tho same kind. If there is a
return request on the envelope tho letters
aro roturned. If not Uioy go to the dead let
ter office until some clerk will once moro
make a guefs."
Not far from 8 o'clock one summer even
ing a telephone mestago came luto the ffl e
saying that a man was drowned in the river
about two miles from town. Hastily caldng
n team the reporter went out and fcund
about a dozen men and women standing
upon tho bank of tho small stream whe-ie
a man was shouting in a louu voice una ees
tlculatlng wildly.
No one In tho crowd could understand tho
words bo uttered, but from his gestures It
was understood that someone bad fallen into
tho river.
"What's the use of standing around here
solng nothing whoa a mtn Is drowned, even
Fisherman!
is cooling and
just the thing
for this hot
weather. We
have the larg
est and iinest
lot of Bath Sponges in the
city.
An elegant bleached wool
sponge very
large for. . ."
A very fine Mediterranean
liuth Sponge In
several nlzeg, to
morrow at 05c,
45o and
35c
A complete line of all
kinds bathing necessities at
remarkably low prices.
Picture An, pportUfl-
lty to frame pic-
rTalTlcS tures cheaply.
A white enamel reeded
frame size 8x10 with
glass and mat -
10c
tomorrow each.
A light, strong oamp stool
just the thing to carry
with you at picnics-
tomorrow,
each ..
24c
An imitation cherry cen
ter table, to
morrow 39c
if you cannot understand the lingo?" re
marked a farmer whose team had bten
stopped by the crowd and he went to a
neighboring bouse, returning with a coll of
rope and a pair of grappling hooks.
"I'll go down and get a boat," said a sec
ond, and off he started.
In tho meantime the reporter was en
deavoring to ascertain the facts. He soon
learned that he could gain nothing from (he
man who was shooting, as he spoke no Eng
Huh. Just then a German was seen In the
crowd and called. After the man with the
volco had spoken to him for a moment the
German said:
"This man Is a Russian and speaks no
otbsr language. My father-in-law speaks
Russian and I'll go get him."
When the Russian-speaking German, who,
by the way, had never mastered the English
language, came upon the scene he jabbered
with the stranger for a moment and then
spoke with bis son-in-law. The German
broke Into a loud laugh and said:
"Ladles and Chondlemen: Deie man say
hees brudder is schwlmmlng In do river ven
a man und voman comes along und he hol
lers to hecs brudder to hide. He Is now
biding underdo bank und it you all vlll
yust go avay he vlll come oud und tress."
This ended tho sensation just fs the skiff
with a volunteer rescue corps appeared
around the bend In the river.
Judge Ben Baker, the acknowledged wit of
the district court, always has a ready an
swer for every proposition be encounters,
bnt be struck something in tho book agent
line recently that was rather too muoh for
him. Judge Baker was in his private office
waiting for a Jury when two dapper young
men entered. The Judge greeted them with
his characteristic cordiality.
"Judge, wo understand you are a great
reader, and we bnve something to show
you," said young man number ono. At the
same time lie exhibited a prospectus of some
great man's writing. Judge naker will stop
anything at any time to look at a good book,
so It was only a moment until be was an
Interested listener. Young man number two
kept still while number one talked, but when
tho vocal endurauce and vocabulary of num
ber one bocame jaded number two picked up
tho story whero number one had left off,
nud so they continued to alternate for nearly
an hour.
'Stop," said Judge Baker, "that will do:
I'll take tho books. , I can bold my own
with one book ngent, but when they come at
mo In relays I surrender."
'That shows tho perversity of woman
kind," remarked tho man whoso face bad
lines Indicating that his wife suffers norvous
tremors all of the time he ls In the house.
Just look at those women," he continued.
The three scats at the rear of these open
street cars nre reserved for the use of
smokers and, It you will notice, you will
find them occupied by women when tho other
seats are vacant. I have watched It for
years and they Invariably cause me to throw
away my cigar or climb onto the back of
tho car" and he stepped from the car and
walked a block in order to continue his'
smoke.
To Anttimn Snfferera.
Lawson Elvldge of Barrlngton, III., says
ho was cured of chronic asthma of long
standing by Foley's Honey and Tar. It
gives positive relief In all cases of asthma,
so this disease, when not completely cured,
U robbed of all Its terrors by this great
remedy. For sale by Myer's-Dlllon Drug
Co., Omaha, and Dillon's Drug Store, South
Omaha.
Omitted the Attlo.
Baltimore American: "I am a self-made
man." said the nroud Individual.
"Well, you uro all rleht except as to
your head," commented the other part of
me conversation.
"How's that?"
"The part you talk with Is out of propor
tlon to the part you think with."
A
Sponge
Bath
25c
I IT 111,1,11
(?BUY ea a
T noticed
that everlasting sweet
38c
48c
25c
Crockery Department J
ment, Brilliant berry saucers, 2c, Semiporcelain saucers, 2c,
Pyramid table of heavy gold fancy pieces, your choice for 9c,
- Wide awake semi-porcelain rose decora-
III tion assortment of plates, bowls, salads, teas, meat dishes I W
J nannies, etc. vour choice 10c Crystals China vases 10o -A. J
Berry Bowls Fine imitation cut glass, 25c class for 14c.
39c
Breezy midsummer drives on pure pebble Flemish Stoneware!
Old blue decorations, water coolers, pitchers, steins, mugs, but
ter jars, bean pots, growlers, etc., the coolest hot weather ware
made at special prices.
MIKE O'SUEA AND RIS VIEWS
Veteran of the Twenty-Becond at Fort
Orook Grows Beminiscent.
DISAPPROVES OF M KINLEY'S POLICY
bikes Roosevelt as IV Hnn and a Sol
dier, but nays the Colonel
Can't Hare Ills
Vote.
To see Fort Crook at Its best visitors must
mako the tour of Inspection under the
guidance of Mike O'Shea. During the Span
ish war Mike was with Roosevelt and in
going up San Juan hill he managed to get
In front of some bullets. Mike has a stronger
namo for them than dum-dum which sent
him to the hospital and gave him a pension
that allows blm to live a life of ease and
devote much time to telling how he and
Teddy "done" It. In the glorious days of
the Twenty-second, Mlko soldiered at Fort
Creok and his affection for the place is so
strong that he stays around there to keep
the members of the Tenth from forgetting
what a "bloomln' lot of kids" they are.
Mike eats his meals at the Fort Crook, hotel
and spends most of bis time testing Mil
waukee brews and directing the foreign
policy of William "Mlklnlsy." .
"Ugh, Crook has seen her blst days!
Nothln' here now but beardless boys that
nlver smclled nothln' betther'n smokeless
powder and thinks tblmsllves very tough
whin they guzzles Ice cream sodas. Dty
on their poor stomachs! It mokes us old
tolmers ashamed Iv th' rlgular army and our
past victories. Can you picture' tho lolko
Iv thtm cbastn' old Geronlme. They'd shy
at a red blanket an' a box Iv greaso paint."
Mike's remarks were prompted by the
sight of a squad of young fellows in uni
forms who wore loafing in front of the
guard house.
Doctors Are Too Cartons.
"What's that llttlo new house up there
by th' hospital? Why that's whero they'll
put the dead'uns and tho doctors go up there
and cut 'em open. You nlver seen nothln'
lolke th' curlosltee of theso army doctors.
They'll try their scalpers on anngthen from
a grasshopper to an army mule. But ain't
this a folne post?" the Irishman asked as
he waved bis .hand In tho direction of the
officers' quarters and turned toward the
barracks on the other side of tho parade
ground. "And to think all this folnery is
for a lot o' young bucks that nln't poured
load at nothln' wld no more lolfe In It than
tblra target practice numbers on th' hill.
Practlcln' on Apaches and Spaniards gives
a man Ideas these lads' skulls wouldn't
hold."
At the mention of lads Mike seemed to
grow several feet higher nnd swelled up
until he looked as large as General Shatter.
He didn't propose to have onybody overlook
bis manly proportions, oven If he was filled
with Spanish bullets. His arras raised in
voluntarily and could not resist the tempta
tion to take mock aim at a supposed enemy.
"Ol" Mother Nature picked this spot out
fer an army post an' set that high knoll up
there so the governments be sure not to
overlook It. That'B the reservoir up there
with tho red.top on It an' It's filled with th
blst water these mud-drlnkin' Nebraskans
Iver tasted. You ought tl see these lads
drink water. Why, you'd think that's what
It was mado fer. They ain't much lolke th'
Twlnty-sccondl Th' mlmory of tnat reg
ment makes ms happy."
Mike's voice trembled and a tew tears
came Into bis eyes at the recollection of
these good old days before the war.
"That building wld tower on it over
Hji't7 'o Don't overlook it!
" "'6"' Our basket fired Japan
a Pfcc yu canno afford to pass un
This is an extraordinary value has
flavor that draws you
Twenty-five chests on sale Monday,
get your order in early price per pound 38 centB
Other value in S. D. Japan, Oolong
English Breakfast, Gunpowder and Young Hy
sonprice Monday, per pound, forty -eight cents
For Monday we are offering you a
great bargain in Java and Moca Coffee at 25c lb.
Wide awake semi-porcelain rose decora
tion assortment of plates, bowls, salads, teas, meat dishes
nappies, etc, your choice 10c Crystal fc China vases 10c
Emerald half-gallon Pitchers, 34c.
On Display Table No. 1 selected
crystal Berry Sets emerald, opal, flint choice
of any set for Thirty-nine oents.
there on the hill? That's a Prlsbyterlan
college, Bellevue college. But that town of
ellevuo nlver will amount to annythln',
It's pro-bl-bltlon."
'Prohibition" In Pat's mouth has a mourn
ful sound that Is equal to bis funereal ref
erences to the palmy days of the Twenty-sec.
ond.
'Vote fer Roesoveltl Ol'd as soon take
another pull at the yellow jack. An' still
Ot'm not afther sayln' he ain't a renl hero
an' a brave lad, hut Ol ain't hankerln' after
callln' th' sultan iv Sulu brother, an' af-
flllatln' with naygura an' haythens Iv wan
kind an' another. But Colonel Teddy can
havo annythln' but me vote. Wo both havo
views on contractln' an' expandln', but Ol
would expand the currency an' conthract th'
territory, an' me friend Teddy would reverse
th proeeta."
A question concerning one of the large
buildings south of tho parade ground Inter
rupted Pat's political reflections. "That long
house ls th' club bouse. That's where th'
shoulder straps have their parties an' balls.
An" the cellar over there woll, It's got all
a glntleman oan want. Little green drinks
wld Ice In thlm nnd peppermint mixed In V
make folks think thy'ro just soda fountain
drlnty ordered widout wlnkln' at th' boy
that does th' tappln,' an' good whisky ruluc4
by stlrrln' all kinds lv French stuff and
fruit Into It.
"But there'll be a lot lv shoulder straps
stop slppln' fashionable drinks an' go t'
altln' rice wld chopsticks if this jambauree
In th' east keeps up. An thin we'll expand
a few thousand miles more. These hot
days affects Mlklpley's policy an' railroad
rails Just tho same way. If th' weather
gits much hotter, Uncle Sam'll decide that
Germany an' Russia an' England Is big
enough an' don't need anny of China an'
ho'Il annex a few hundred million rateaters.
"An' Ol don't care how much lv China wo
gobble, so wo get mixed up wld England
If Undo Sam'll only Just glvp th' Hon n
little punch in the slats and whistle up the
Mccartys and the Q'Sheas and the O'Nells,
that's all that's necessary. Tho Yankees
can stay at borne an' raise corn an' hogs
on' we'll bo glad f do all th' cbasln' up nn
down Majuba hill."
RISCOVKItEO IIKU THimi.
Chose ot n Woninii After n Pntr Unit
Hail Token Her Molarx.
Phlladelnhlans on Diamond street were
very much Interested the other day In
wntchlng tho chuso of a young woman
stylishly dressed after a. pug dog. The wind
was high and during u gust that came
around a. corner the young woman oneezei,
gently at first, and then with somo degree
of violence. A cry of alarm escaped her
lips as something resembling a string of
pearls fell from her mouth to the pavement
For an Instant the object glittered on the
sidewalk, when the frisky dog bounded
to the spot, picked up the rllfitenlng thing
and bounded off (inruln.
Blushing, tho girl, In -her nreplexlty. cast
a wistful ulauce at the iloir In the distance.
Quickly she placed her trembling hand ovtr
ner mouin ana Kepi u mere, wnuo me
started In pursuit of the tlox. Tho chuxt.
was exciting. Pedestrians paused 'o v.itrli.
After mrny turns, rushes, dodger ar.d halts
the nrettv maiden cuucht the (lor at Te'ilh
street. The animal fell prosrute at her
OJinrranas.
"Dron It. Fldo: drnn It!" she cried.
Tho dog obeyed, opened Its mouth. and
dronDed uonn tho Davemcnt with ?reat
reluctance tho nroud maiden's set of false
teeth.
Brother Dicker on Politics.
Atlanta Constitution: "Politics," Hold
Brother Dickey, "hez been de ruination er
me! In de las' election I voted for two
mens wucked night en day, en do Ixjrd
sen' Sunduyl Bofe er 'em couldn't glt de
office; ono er' them did. Do one dot landed
uv Hat he done Rnrn' so much nionov In
de race dat now he'd hatter economize
wld me, en ho didn't have nuttlu' fer mo,
De one dat clt beat as me how I haz de
fgco ter call on him fer money w'en he
didn't have no place ter lay his headl Dat
wuz de een er It. En all I got out er do
whole business wuz ele mls'ry In my lef
side, do rattlln' er de brain en de campaign
eetohl'
to it,
38c
48c
25e
39c
STORY OF A GREEN REPORTER
How Ho Blundered Onto a Sooop of
Unsuspected Dimensions.
ACCIDENT THAT TURNED OUT FOR THE BEST
Job Pat Vp as a Joke Heacln I.lkr
a Diiomerasg to Strike
Dack at Its Per
trators. It happened several years ago In Kansas
City, when I was the youngest and green
est of cubs. Fresh from a llttlo country
town, where I had run a newspaper ot my
own, I was master ot a literary style at
onco pompous and verboso, and had a fac
ulty tor expressing my personal opinions In
ray stuff that caused the elltorlal writer
to regard bis Job as a precarious tenure.
Tho city editor, whom I appraised then as
an uaappreclatlve wretch, used to tell me
that I was employed as a reporter, not as a
counsel; when tho newspaper wanted
opinions, bo said, It would buy and pay
for them. I had been engaged to write
news. Then he would require me to stand
and watch him draw his blue pencil
through some of my most eloquent perlodB.
However, I was working cheap, and
cheapness was a desirable quality In a re
porter on tho "Current" thoso days. I
was assigned to the police run.
Scarcely had I scrsped up an acquaint
ance with the desk sergeant at central
station when something happened that set
tho town by the ears tho suicide of Dr. J.
B. Ward, a prominent physician of ths
place. It was one of tho big stories ot the
season. Not only was tho sulcldo Itself a
matter ot unusual current Interest, but It
furnished tho pretext for dragging out a
chapter In the doctor's personal history
touching the mysterious disappearance of a
young woman named Maude Steels. She
had dropped out of sight suddenly some five
years before, and It was always thought
that tho doctor knew something as to her
fate.
The story of tho suicide and disappearance
occupied four columns In the "Current," ot
which I wrote two sticks, being an Inter
view with the Janitor ot tho building In
which the doctor shot himself.
Tho tragedy was a nine-days' wonder
In Kansas City.
S(cv Lead Uncovered.
One drowsy afternoon about three days
later I was sitting In the reporters' en
closure at the police station waiting for
something to turn up. I was alone, a fact
which caused me no little uneasiness,
Whero wero Wells and Kottlcr? I asked
myself. Could It bo that they were out
worklng,on a scoop! Very probably. Wells,
who represented the "Ledger," was a tire
less and conscientious worker, whom I re
garded with a sort of awe; Kottler, the
"Luminary" reporter, was a sly, resource
ful chap, fond of a Joke, copious of pen a
man who boasted a personal acquaintance
with ovcry officer and bartender In the
city. However, I burled my fnce In an
afternoon papor and affected Indifference
An hour I waited; then, becoming rest
less, began to paco up and down the lobby,
Tho short hand on tho offlc clock was ap
proaching tho figure 4, when suddenly Wells
and Kottler, out of breath and apparently
much excited, rushed up the steps, saw me,
stopped abruptly, exchanged a few whlspored
words and darted into tho chief's private
office, closing the door. A few minutes
later they emerged and stalked (with a de
liberation that seemed to me affected) Into
the reporters' enclosure, where they talked
ot the races at Long Branch. Their manner
We place
on sale
Stationery ?A
Bargains 3S$
memoran
dums, time books and con
ductor's note books at only
5c each.
Blank Books of ail kinds
and styles at lowest possible
prices.
25 extra superfine visiting
cards special Monday
only
5c
"Somethlnk new" Tho Wets Brush
Tube filled with perfumed white
mucilage, sticks quick Is conveulent
and always ready for uso
on sale Monday
each 9c
A Trunk ls a nousc
irUIlK hold neces
Of VclliSe opportunity
to secure
one is at hand-
An embossed zlno covered trunk,
in. long with tray
1.98
and hat box Mon
day only
Black enameled Iron trunk 30 Inches
long oval corners maloablo Iron
bound with deep
4.98
tray and hat
box, Monday
A 14-Inch canvas Telescope Valise
leather bound on cor
ners Monday
only
A 16-lnoh rubbtr cloth
ladles' grip Mon
day, only .
68c
was studied; there could be no doubt ot
that. They exudod an air ot mystery and
looked as wise as a tree full of owls.
It goes without saying that I was wretched.
I was conscious of a vague foreboding of
Impending evil In the form of a scoapjunder
a suven-deck lead.
I went to a neighboring hotel and called
up by telephone every police station, Justice
shop, undertaking establishment and detect
ive agency In the city, not forgetting the
coroner and a few personal friends whom I
thought might help me In my extremity.
Not a word of news did I got from any ot
them. Matters were becoming desporate.
A sTrlr-atl In Need.
I returned to central station. A death
like hush pervaded the place, like a pre-
monltisn of doom. The reporters wero gone.
Every officer I met, even the gentle old
police matron, seemed to navigate an at
mosphere of double-distilled occultism. The
place smclled of conspiracy. I slunk back
into the enclosure to lock my desk.
As I gathered a half dozen pages of copy
preparatory to leaving the station for the
day I was startled by something that
sounded like a snore. It grated harshly on
my nerves. I was not in a charitable mood
toward suoh evidence of a tranquil mind.
Peering Into a dark corner I saw a man
sitting at a table, his face burled In his
arms.
The outline and attitude were familiar to
me. I knew I was In the presence ot Frank
Sparks, one of tho most Irreclaimable dipso
maniacs of the north end, albeit a man of
no mean attainments when sober, which was
aeldcm. In a word, he was a broken-down
nowepaper man. Many was tho time I had
given blm the "price of a night's lodging"
and taken a sort of pride In tho fact that
I bad helped ono with so brilliant a past.
"I must not wake him," I thought. "He
will iouch me for a 'loan' If I do."
I was tiptoeing out of the enclosuro when
he awoke with a yawn and called me back.
"Have you got that story?" be asked,
rising and placing an unstcqdy hand on my
shoulder.
I felt a sudden rush ot blood to my bead.
"What story?"
"What! Didn't you hear about It?"
"About what?"
"Well, now, I'll tell you. Those fellows-
Wells and Kottler are trying to throw you
down. Did you see tho coroner today?"
"No," I answered feebly. "I tried to get
him by 'phone, but he wasn't in."
Sparks assumed a bearing of Importance
and leered at mo with something ot pity
in his oye.
"You've bsen a protty good friend of
mine," he sold. "I've told you several
times, haven't I, that the day would como
wbon I could repay your kindness 7"
"I believe so."
"Well, lf here now. It's the story of
the year. Nothing like It In ray rccol'o tlon
evon the Ward suicide pales before It. But
say, old man, have you got tho price? I
can't talk, you know, with my nervej In
this shape."
Solution of the Mystery.
An hour later, In a fever of excitement,
I rushed into the office of tho "Current"
and laid an Imposing bunch ot copy on the
city editor's desk. It was tho story of an
ante-mortem statement, signed py ur. J. u
Ward, found by the coroner that day amont
tho effects of the sulcldo. The statement
contained a confession that Miss Mau'o
Steele bad died five years before on hh
operating table and that he bad consigned
the body to the river.
From that moment my stock roie In the
"Current" offlco. I was the Urn of tho hour,
But Imagine my surprise when, tho fal
lowing morning, I perused the "Lelger" anl
"Luminary" in vain for the stories of my
competitors on the subject of the ante
mortem statement. They contained not a
syllable ot It.
Again I was the proy of vague forebol-
lngs. Had Wells and Kottler made me
Special
25c
Vnilf wncn purchased
I UU1 0 Bennett comes
Huiiar on ice in our ice
DlUier boxes-it's hard
and cold, ready
for the table when you get
it. We are the only firm in
the city who deliver butter
on ice
Country Butter, per round
17c. 16c and WC
Creamery Dutter OOr
per pound l
Pickles
Large Sour 1'lckles. Iflo
per gallon ...,..""
Small Hour Tickles dZ
dozen
Sweet &Ilxcd l'lcklcs f ft-.
quart lot
Plain Sweet Tickles 1r.
auart IOV
Chow Chow er fKn
quart low
Dill Pickles per
dozen
Preserves
Assorted flavors, per pound. OKn
9c; 3 lbs for OC
ATnnl You can save
VUUI money by buy-
mnkp in& your tobac"
co of Bennett's.
Duke's Mixture, 8-or -4 f"k
Monday's price 1VC
Lucky Cut Plug, 8-oz tins S A
Monday's price
Durham 12-3 ounce
Monday's price Ov
Seal of North Carolina Cut Oi
Plug, 12-8 ounce, Monday ...
Meerschaum, 3 1-3 ounce pkg. 4
Monday's price IvC
Plug Chewing Tobacco
Standard Navy, per pound, OEfi
Monday ODv
Horse Shoe, per pound, A(n
Monday 4Uv
Star, per pound, ' A
Monday Vfw
Battle Ax, per pound 2(-i
Monday UUw
tho butt of a practical joke? Perish tho
thought! Yet things looked suspicious. I
reviewed my conversation with Sparks as
we sat at that little table In "Joe's place."
and recalled bis explanation of how he
came In possession ot the "facts." He had
been sitting In the reporter's enclosuro at
tho station half asleep, he said. Wells nnd
Kottler entered. He was In the dark and
they didn't seo him. Tboy began talking
ot tho "sensation." Ono ot them road
aloud a copy of tho ante-mortem statement.
Just then they nav him, and appearod to
be much taken aback. They asked him it
he had heard what they said; tto said lie
had. Then they tried to pledge him to
socrecy, Insisting that above all things ha
must not breathe a word ot it to mo. Then
they bud loft him.
All this, which had seemed so plausible
to mo at the time, began, In tho light of
later developments, to sound fishy. Surely
I was cither the grandest hero or the blgg(st
ass In Kansas City, with chances somewhat
In favor of tho lattor.
There was a sinister gleam In the oye of
the city editor when I showed up to get
my afternoon's assignment, but he said
nothing.
If I had had any doubt an to whether I
wan a hero or an ass It was quickly dis
sipated when I reached the station. Wells
was standing at tho hond of tho stairs to
greet me with a loud guffaw of derlson, nud
throughout the afternoon I was subjected
to the jocrs of the police department, and
It seemed to me of every banger-on and
hobo of the north end. I began to wonder
If I'd best go back to the country town and
biro out as office boy for the paper for
which I was onco editor.
Along about 6 o'clock that night I met
ono of the deputy coroners on tho street.
"Who gavo you that statement?" ne
asked, sternly.
"Kick me If you want to," I answerca,
doggedly, "but spare mo your pleasantries."
Ho hesitated a raomont and seemed nooui
to act on the first part of my suggestion.
"We had strict orders not to give that
out." ho resumed. "It was tho old man's
the doctor's father's request. You didn't
get It right, anyway. Tho statement
doesn't say that ho consigned the body to
the river, but that he consumed It In quick
lime. And we didn't And It yesterday
among his effects, either. Wo'vo had It
ever since his dead body was discovered.
Who gavo It to you? You'll bo doing rae
n favor If you'll tell, becauso I don't want
tho coronpr to suspect mo."
My spirit took another somersault.
Tho next morning tho Ledger and
Luminary contained brief accounts, In
tho main corroborative of my story about
tho antomortom document. It was then
my turn to laugh, but I choso not to Im
prove It; I treated Wells and Kottler with
cold disdain.
However, I'll always believe that th'
drunken Sparks was In the conspiracy with
tbom to make rae the butt of a Joke.
F. W,
New York's Nev Mweners.
Now York's white wings nro doomed
Street sweepers, teamsters, snow shovclen
-all aro to bo put out of business by a. bla
machine, nnd ono that can do three times
tho work of Percy Naglo's whole hrlgnde.
This machlno sprinkles, sweeps and cleani
at tho namo time. Already It has been
placed on trial by Commissioner Nagle.
There Is no mystery about the Invention,
It woVtlrst tried In Wheeling. W. Vo., lit
which state tho company that exploits I
was Incorporated with u. capital stock ol
15,000,000.
Wagons of tho company will bo operated
by compressed air. Electricity nlso can b
used. These wagons aro culled "purparts.
They aro so constructed ns to bo able tt)
sweep tho streets under all conditions,
Dust, dirt and slush disappear before tncll
onslaught. In winter nn attachment Is ur.
run Red by which snow Bhovollng can l
done.
For quality, purity, boquet and healthful,
ncss there Is no wine as good as Cook's Im
perial Extra Dry Champagne.