T3IE OMAHA DAILY BEE : THURSDAY 28 , lvS95) ) . | . THE PATH TO PERDITION. | By LOUIS VINCENT OE FOE , I ( Copyright , 1S . by Louis Vincent t > * T * . ) Fran tbc window erf tteacon BtrdseU'i faouM tb bright rays c.f lamp market the fortes ot the country road which led to UK right , fst tn * old Qu X r sn * tl iR hous * . and , to the left , through the iroridly and lalinlUMia village allied Into existence only a yer * # fore by th corals * of the new railroad. rah little cluttw of ho , a murtroow growth ol unpalnled bomrtf. Included , be sides a Mackamlth shop and general More , bath wetacnne enwigh In their way. a tAvem condutted on wide-open principle * , under the nam * of Lowden's Half-Way home. which Ji d spet-dlly krwisht the locality Into general dlMspute. No cue had dlMwere t toward what goal It marked th hall-way point , uDlew It w that goal of torment w-W < * te the ending of every career of In temperate profligacy. in the dlnlD * room , which wnred llkewlee as a sitting room , the deacon was carefully gleaning stray scrap * of wisdom from tfce columns ol the ( Michigan Agricultural , the ellenc * of the house disturbed only by the loud ticking of the farm clo k on the shclt In tie corner and the busy click of knitting needles In the deft fingers ot Mrs. Blr4ell. It was characteristic cf the deacon that he always poitponftd his study of the Agricul turist until after the harvest , when the In formation he might gain wax eure to be ot least value to him. Presently the clock lolled the hour of S , lingering long. It leemed. upon the final stroke. Deacon Birdstll mrted suddenly. "Mother. " he said , "don't you know It's gettln' pretty late ? " Mrs. Blrdsell paused In surprise and dropped the half-finished sock In her lap. "Els-hl and afte.an' It's lilgh time folks wj > abed , " > W the deacon. "Did you fchut down the back window an' bolt the kitchen door ? An' Joel of course , Joel's In. " Aa If In answer to the deacon's question , the quavering , uncertain notes ot a song sifted through the celling from Uhe chamber above. "Sh ! " 'Mrs. ' Blrdsell said , holding up her Qaesr In wainln ? The eong from the chamber above grad ually became more distinct until a word could -bo understood here and there In Its uncertain rhythm. It bore a distant re semblance to one of the popular sons' of the day heard wlti great frequency in the neighboring town , but justly abhorred for its worldly Insinuations In the peaceful Quaker church neighborhood. "William , " exclaimed ilrs. Blrdsell in a trembling voice , "somethln1 must be done ' ' awful ! It's right away. It's gettln' Just been welghln' on my mind until sometimes I cet that nervous. " The deacon gathered his shaggy gray brows and stroked his angular , unshaven chin In silence for a moment. "I ha.te to think ot It. Joel. " he observed thoughtfully , "but 1 guess it must be true. Have you been notlcln * anything else lately , Mar tha ? " Tie deacon seldom addressed his wife by her given name except on occasions of great solemnity. "Anythln' ! Good land alive ! " Mrs. Bird- sell swept her hands around her head as If \ ehe was warding off a swarm of Impending evil. "It's gettin' worser and worser every day. " ehe exclaimed with great earnestness , "an1 the worst part of it all Is he's gettln' that brazen about it to think , too. William , that he's your own brother ! " The song be gan again in the chamber above , this time accompanied by the unmistakable sound of shufjllng feet. "Just listen to that , now , " she went on , with mournful emphasis. "I guess you can hear it for yourself ! " "Yi , mother , you're right , " pronounced the deacon reflectively , elowly nodding his head in the affirmative. "Poor Joel Is cer tainly goln' straight to the I was almost goln' to say devil , an * here we are , you an' me , sitting with our hands folded , not doin' a blessed thing to put him right. " "It didn't get real bad 'till the middle of June leastwise Joel didn't take to goin' out nights 'till then. " Mrs. Blrdsell squinted thoughtfully through her glasses as if to look Into the past. "I first susplcioncd him circus day over in the town , vhen he spent all that money for a box of collars an' them red and green neckties. He seemed right ashamed of 'em , too that is to say at first he did. " "When was it ho spoke to you about creasln * his pant legs ? " "Why , dear me , you " ain't forgotten that , lave you ? It was "the very Fame day he come out from town brlngln' his tall coat. I'll never forget that ! He was precious careful to keep that rldlc'lous thing out of my sight an' when he spoke about the pants he blushed like a boy. He says to me , Martha , sometime when you've got a flatiron - iron on I wish you'd press out my gray pants an' leave 'em creased before and behind. Folks say , nowadays , it keeps 'em from wc-arln1 cut so quick. ' I almost gave him a piece ot my mind right then an' there. I says , 'Joel Blrdscll ! An' at your time in life , too. ' He didn't say another -word , but went off upstairs that ashamed an' that very night was the first time In the twenty year * he stayed out till after midnight ! " Deacon Birdsell clasped his long fingers around his bony knee and bowed his head. "If I do say It. 1 watched him from the window when he went out. " Sirs. Birdsell earnestly continued , "an" I seen him tramp straight off toward the tavern. 'Twasn't the last time I've seen him , either. " The deacon suddenly started up and thumped his fist hard upon the table. "Them Ix > wdcns will get to prison yet ! " ho burst out with indignation. " 'Twould be a true religious act to see their cussed dram shop on fire" I'd do It. too. if " Mrs. Blrdsell reached across the table to place a restraining band upon her husband's arm , but the tips of her fingers barely touched his shirt sleeye. "William , " she paid In a more composed tone , "we musn't get excited. What we must do U to 'tend to Joel's case. The Lord that judges be tween the. righteous an' the unrighteous will 'tend to the Lowdens Ulrnwlf" Before such an undenUtble exposition of truth the fanner's anger slowly ublded. "Vou know the time Joel washed the buggy an' went to town ? " Mrs. Bir.Isei ; went on. "He didn't get back that night 'itll a quarter past twelve , an 'he took his boots off before he come Into the house. I know- all about it because he clean forgot ' m an' left 'em on the porrb " "You wouldn't call them things boots , "I have been troubled u grrat deal wltU a torpid lirer , which produces ronsUpa tion J to 'tid ' CASCAKETd to be 11 you rUta fortbrm ant ] secured such relief the Urst tr.ul. ttit I puribKCtl another supply nud w&i com pletely cured 1 ghull ony bo too clad to rio- ciintccnJ t'iwarct ! . whenever the opportunity U presented ' J. A. SMITH aX > Su jueh&nn Are. , Philadelphia. Pa Pleitnt. P Ut bl . 1-utom T H Good Do Good , N T rbicktDVraLro , CT Gti | < - Kc. c We. CURE CONSTIPATION. . . . Bold ted rveran'fnl t > r wouM vou"1" The dwron threw his whrie available fund ef narcaftm Into the word * . "Gaiters , I mean , " corrected Mrs. Bird- Mill , quickly. "An" that's another thing. Jmt to think of a man uMn' to gaiters after boot * ha < be n good enough tor him for fifty y wr ! It's a sure sign , Willtam. " "y . mother , < lwrs tie long and the Rhort of It. Oalura may be a small thing In tfaetB * l e * . but In Jc-d's cas they help powerful < o sbow what f n llvln1 and strong drink will do , once a tnaa gets goln' in the The dracoo started suddenly at tlie tnein- Ing of hie own wordrt A spade had flnajry been called a ipade. Mrs. Birdieil stralght- way began to sob audibly. hlle her hu - band f irehrd abvractedly for his hand kerchief , which be finally produced from the armbole of hit veM. Joel DlroVell filled itie place ot a tea not only In the hearts , but In the home ot the dacon and his wife. Hick * a the 50s. when heavy timber stllr covered what Is now th * rich , rolling farmland of lower Mich igan. William BlrdsHl had gene forth from the circumscribed acres of the homestead in Vermont to win a place for himself In the world , K I'll only a > oung wife and his own grit to aid him. Thiu Michigan was not the farmer's Eldorado h afterward came to be. But the houce in which he still lived was built and then Joel , the n < > w younger by three years , was sent for to share the In creasing fortunes Incidentally to Tend a helping < hand In the running ot the farm. And Joel he was a shining example of New England stagnation. Never inclined to marry , always content whli a kind of heJpltss dependence upon his brother and sister , whose home had not been brightened 'IT'S TIME HONEST FOLKS WAS ABED AND ASLEEP. " by the advent ot children , h grew more and more to be the object of parental solicitude to the farmer and his wife as the years passed by. He was satisfied with his unique position and gradually the horizon ot his life come to be bounded by the views and wishes of his foster parenut Mrs. Blrdscll was the first to break the oppressive silence. "William , " she said , "there's no use puttin' It off any longer. Suppose we call Joel down now this very ulght an' point out to him like tell him that is to say , ask him " She hesitated. The task seemed greater when framed la words. "Sh ! " The exclamation escaped the pall at the same instant. In the chamber above the sen ? began again. This time the words were loud and distinct , although the tune was still doubt ful. Silently the couple followed the Hues : I dreamt that I dwelt in marble halls Not a word -was uttered until the verse ended. Mrs. Blrdsell was busy making a mental analysis of the meaning ot the words their Import seemed beyond a doubt. "It's a real gamblln' house tune , " Eho pronounced , with assurance born of convic tion , although there was a trembling In her voice. "I've heard all about the infernal places. All marble an' glass an' electric lights an' polished woodwork. " The squeaking , heavy footsteps grew louder. The culprit was certainly coming down the stairs. Next the door opened aud he walked Into the dining room. Mrs. Bird- sell looked straight in front of her. The deacon hastily snatched the Agriculturist from the table. Joel appeared surprised to find the rest of the family keeping late hours. "Still settln' up , " he asked. Innocently enough , but in the ears of the others the words had a guilty ring. From the comer of her eyes Mrs. Bird ie ! ! was taking a quiet Inventory of Incrim inating evidence. Tieru was the red neck tie encircling the stand-up collar that sagged out In tired fashion at the front. The lung- tailed ceRt was also conspicuous. She wished she had had the forethought to put on her spectacles , for she knew- that proper scru tiny would detect faint creases in front of the bagging gray pants. As for < he shoes the noise on the stairs had already told its own btory. "Well , I guefis I'll walk out for a little bit , " lie went on , taking no notice of the unusual restraint. "The sky's as clear as a bell , an * It eeenis just shameful to etay In. Won't have many more nlghu like this. " "It's time honest folks was al > od an * ase ! < > i > . " The deacon's voice grated har hly , although he tried his best to bo natural. "That's just one of your notions , Wil liam. " Joel answered with a faint laugh. "Come now , night's jut ss good as day , iln't It ? Don't fret about me. Just leave the key to the dining room doxar under the clone by the steps an' I'll get in all right. " There w s no raply. "An1 that remind * me. " the culprit went on. "the next time I go to town I'm goln' to take tihat key aloag with me an' have one made like It. No use ( aikln * a man ought to tave a latch key. " Thu la t wordly whim , more slgnQcant than anything oUe uorte even than the reck'eta ' gel up of tie costume fell with astounding weight on the farmer and bis wiff It was nothing less than the limit of moral depravity. In the suddenness ot the shock there -was no chance for reply. Joel hesitated a moment , then picked up bis bat and went out. Tte deacon and his wife remained seated. rigid wiih eoactaraailon , until they heard him step ott the porefa. Tien with , one ac cord they ar * and tiptoed to the parlor window. Peering out Into the darkness they watcfced felm walk through the yard to the gate and then turn his steps in tha direction of the tavern , the lights of which twinkled dimly half a mile away down the left fork of the road. "The time's come Martha , " the deacon burst ou"J i will hear from me tha first thin ; tomorrow mornln ! He's got to shut off hie scand'lous. drunken ways In- stun'er or by the Lord1 he 11 never stay an- oth r day under my root1" j Mrs. Blrdtell was fairly struck dumb be fore her husband's awful denunciation. It was the first time la her married life that ' he had so ruthlessly broken the third com mandment , and she laid herself down to broken sleep and troubled dreams. The first gleam of the rising eun was already painting gold and purple hues In , the eastern sky when the deacon slowly I roused to the troubles of a new day. Quickly | throwing on his working clothes he hastened - I tened to the foot of the stairs. j "Joel ! " he called to the upper chamber , | "Joel , be stlrrtn' ! The sun's more'n an hour high ! We've overslept scaad'lous ! " No answer came from above. "Joel ! " This time there was an angry ring In the word. And still no answer. The deacon did not call again , but started briskly for the stables , his heavy boot heels ' making dark half-circles in the light frost I that covered the ground. He was surprised again to find the heavy doors thrown wide open to the morning brceies. Sounds were J issuing from within , and , as he paused , he heard his brother Joel's voice lifted In song , the rtiythm punctuated by the steady "swish" of milk against the bottom and sides of the tin milk can. The absolute unexpectedness ot the situation caused the deacon to hesitate In doubt for a moment on the threshold. BendIng - Ing slightly forward and listening attentively he managed to catch the words : Bet my money on the old bay mare. Somebody bet on the gray The doggerel had only one meaning to the deacon. It was a ehameless defense ot horse racing , an unholy pastime into which he had gained some insight through the In nocent medium ot country fairs. "Mornin" , William ! " The greeting was fresh and dheery surely not spoken with the languor that Is supposed to follow a night of debauchery. "Guees you kind ot overslep' . Must be you and mother kept late hours ! " "There's one way you might o1 knowed bow- late hours mother an" me kept. " The deacon's answer bristled with harsh insinu ation , but It was all lest on the erring one. Whistling softly to fclmself. he picked * up the milk palls again and etarted for the douse while uae deacon , mystified and angered , clambered up the perpendicular ladder to the hay loft. He threw down a generous quantity of sweet smelling clover to the neighing. Impatient horses below and then leaned meditatively upon the fork handle to arrange In his mind the admoni tory talk which he was more certain than ever alone intervened between his brother and irredeemable damnation. The morning meal in the little farm house was not as comforting as usual , par ticularly for tbe farmer and his wife. It might have been noticed that the deacon lingered long and fervently over the thanks which he invariably offered up from his board. It might lhave been noticed also that appended to those fervent thanks was an earnest supplication that Divine Providence in Its all-seeing wisdom might not judge 'harshly the weakness of ills erring children , all of which was lost on Joel. Inasmuch as it was well known to be a part of the dea con's religions philosophy to regard all earthly beings as weak and sinful In the eyes of the Lord. As for the deacon , he was surprised to note that Joel's appetite seemed even better than usual. The meal finished. Mrs. Birdsell arose and from force of habit began to clear away the duties. "Joel , " the deacon said , trying to appear natural and at ease , although in eplte of himself there was a threatening ring in his | voice , "supposln * you walk down to the barn with me for a moment. "I've got sometbin' I'd like to talk over with you this mornin' . " Joel had picked up bis bat and had started toward tbe door. "Better put It off till din ner , William. " he replied carelessly. "I'm , an 'hour late now getting to the creamery , I ' " an' - "Then the creamery can wait ! I want you should do what I say ! D1 you hear ? " I "All right , then ; must be somethln' terI I rlble pressin' . What's on your mind ? " Joel detected a stern look on ibis brother's face and sensibly concluded that argument was a waste of time. j The deacon did cot wait to make further reply , but started out of tbe bouse , motionIng - Ing for his' brother to follow him. Silently leading the way , he sought the seclusion of the store room , where a nondescript collection - < lection c slelg-hs and bobsleds stood , cov- j ered and festooned with a summer's ac- I cumulation of dust and cobwebs. Tbe i silence of tbe place was impressive and in Its selection tbe good man prided himself on the exercise of a neat bit of strategy. Furthermore , it removed tbe most remote danger of Interruption. For some time the deacon sat in silence , hi ! cold eyei sharply fixed upon bis brother's face. Then , when the suspense bad begun to grow painful , be cleared his throat with evident effort and spoke , carefully weighing every word. "Joel , " he said , "I've come down here to talk to ) ou man to man an' I'm In earnest. It's bard , but it's got to be done. It's been on my mind for a long time. " j "I hope there ain't any trouble. William. " ! Tbe ehadow of an Impending calamity haJ gradually formed before Joel'a eyes and his face wore a pale and anxious look. "Troubl * ? Ye , there U trouble , and pltnty of it. Tbe truth Is , I've been mother and I've been watchln' you nov this last , six moatbc , aa' what you've been doln * IB as clear to us aa an open book. " Instantly a iheefrlth. self-conscious expres sion spread ItuHf over Joel's face and bis eyes sought the floor In embarrassment. The deacon noted the quick Chang * and bis last lingering doubt inctantly vanished. HU course was now- clearly defined. ' Yes , Joel , " be condbutd , with greater earnestness there s no use dcnytn U now Mother n me " 1 ain't dtnyln' nothtn' , William " The deacon started suddenly ami bit his lips with aager. The Ian thins be bed tn- ttelp&led W3s a frank acknowledgment of girth. It came m unexp ! ly that be hardly knew hoar to go on , yet he realized that the beat w-ay ? o approach te crisis was by successive Meps- The culprit eiblbltod no further willingness to epeak In s rf-de- tense , so the deacon plunged in acaln. "Yes , " he repeated , "we knowed all about you right along. We suplcloned you when you took to hlgh-fansled notion * about stand-up collars and gay npcktlcs ; we was surer of It when you got to spendln' your money on tall coats an' such , an' then , " dropping his voice to an Insinuating whis per and punctuating each word with a pause , "we finally saw through the whoJe thing when you took to goin' out late nights. " Before sutb an accumulation of evidence Joel hung his head. His expression changed gradually from embarrassed confu sion to guilty assurance , wiile with the heel of his boot he unconsciously drew par allel lines on the dusty barn floor. "Well , what of it , William ? " be asked , with a faint smllo. "What If you have ? " "What of U ? " The deacon repeated the words with angry surprise. "Yes. what of It ? I don't see the good of makln' a fuss about It , anyway. " The deacon swallowed something that seemed to rise in his throat to choke his words. "What of It ? " he repeated again angrily. "Why. man , you have gone clean mad ? Can't you see that If you keep on It's goln' to make your life a regular hell on earth ? " Even the unpleasant prospect of Immedi ate earthly perdition seemed to have no effect upon the culprit. His confusion did not diminish , but his smile broadened to a faint laugh. Then he looked thoughtful and said : "I shouldn't hardly think you'd like to say that , William. " "Say It , man alive ! Why don't I know It ? Do you think I've been llvln * all these years for nothln' ? Ain't it always that way ? " The deacon spoke the words in an anery treble accompanied by an impatient and deprecating gesture. "An' besides. Joel , " he went on , his voice rising to a still higher key , "look at it this way , if it ain't tro late. You've got a little money put by In the savin's bank. How long do you suppose Its' goln' to last If you keep on ? " To a financial consideration of the ques tion Joel made no Immediate answer. He seemed to be actually reckoning up the costs. After meditating quietly for a little while , he composedly replied1 "Well , suppose It does cost a little more ? I guess it's worth the difference. " The calm reduction ot moral depravity tea a matter of dollars and cents brought tbe deacon to his feet with an impatient start. "An1 your friends your new- friends ! " he exclaimed , "what do you suppose they'll do when your money's gone ! Are they giln' to stand by you then ? " "Come , William , you talk as If I was goln' to commit a crime Instead of just followln' out a man's natural wxy. There ain't much danger of starvin" anyhow. " Joel's Im patience , too , was beginning to show itself. "If you're goln' to go back on me now , well , I suppose there's other places. I can go to. I wasn't expectln' to etay in the old house much longer , anyhow. But I didn't think this of you , William. It ain't deserved for you to get mad. " "Tryin' to play reproachful , eh ! Just look back over the last thirty years or more. Ain't I always been all a brother could be ? Ain't Martha been more'n a flesh an' blood sister could 4 > e ? An1 how about your home ? Ain't It been all a reasonable man could want ? " The deacon's voice trembled a little as he rapidly summed up the list of unappreciated kindnesses. "Well , William , I ain't forgettin' all that not a bit of it. But what if a man.after a -while , gets tired of llvin' day in an' day out in a rut ? What If he wants to get out into a bigger , better life. I suppose 1 wouldn't thought of It If the railroad hadn't been put through. I got to goln' there first when they was layln' the tracks. Well , that was all right enough an' then " "Tiat'll do. Enough of that ! I won't hear It from your lips. " "An then " "Stop , man ! I say , stop. In the name of what little regard lor decency you've got left ! I won't hear from you ! I didn't come out here to listen to your boastln' an' plumln * yourself about your reckless , sense- lees goln' on. " Then tbe deacon's bloodless Jips trembled as he fairly thundered the com mand and shook his clenched fist in un bridled wrath. "I won't have it made any worse by your goln' Into all the details of what you did , " he went on , hotly. "I wanted you to listen to reason an' I wanted to talk to you like a brother. But there ain't any reason left in you. It's gone too far an * Martha an * I'm too late. You're proud of that broader life you talk about , are you ? All right , then ; now listen to what I've got to say. The way's etlll open to you to turn over a new- leaf an1 come back and ibe one of us , as you was before Ibe Lowdens and tbelr tavern came to Quaker Church. It's got to be one or the other an' you've got to decide right now. Either you quit this new , broader life that you've been harpln' on or you must get along without Martha an' me from this day for'ard. " The deacon pronounced the sentence in excited , impassioned tones. "The way's open , which do you take ? " he repeated , wiping away the beads of told sweat that stood out upon bis brow. Joel's flushed face turned pale at tbe deacon's words. They cut him like a sharp knife , and bis brother knew it. But quickly tbe scornful look returned , and he met the issue squarely half way. Without a tremor he stepped close to bis brother , and , plac ing his band gently on tbe other's shoulder , exclaimed : "William , William , If it was tbe last thing on earth. I didn't expect this of you ! If it was anybody else , I'd a said he'd gone clean crazy. You an' mother never did circulate much around among the neighbors , but I never once bad an idea either of you had anything against Miss' Cook. I can't understand It. Her bus- band's been dead for three years now , an' durln' that whole time ebe'a hardly been outside her dooryard. It's goln' to be hard to tell her that this Is our weddln' present from you an' llartha , but I can do It , an' I will. One thing has got to be settled be tween you an1 me. howbomever" here Joel's words became deliberate and foreboding "I ain't goln' to stand up an' listen to any body throw miserable slurs on tbe woman that's goln' to be my wife not even you , my own brother , an1 a deacon in the church , who ought to be above such a thing. I want you to understand that if tbe Lowden boys did build their tavern across from her house , the ain't responsible nor the worse for It ! An' as far as that place Is concerned , I hate it worse than you do. It's hurt her property scand'Ious ! " Wedding bells often ring out in unex pected places. Their notes are the sweeter when they sound above the din of discord. In vain the deacon , perplexed and confused , his excited mind In a whirl , tried to Inter rupt Joel's words. Then h gave up the attempt and grasped weakly at the objects near htm for support. He could only gasp "Mies' Cook you marry ilUs' Cook the Widow Cook aa the crosiin' I you " "We've been Uilnkln' it over ever since tbe day tbe circus was In town. An1 last nlgfat we fixed it all up an' decided to bitch. " "Lord save us all ! Joel. I " It wag too much for the deacon and bis strength deserted him. Hl knees bent beneath hli weight and bia volre dropped to an Inaudible wbloper. He leaned upon tbe sleigh and tig tfft , a * -t lM < ? V > a k his * rered rentes. Then b au Irtenlv f in I hi ; voice acaln. ' Is that th * raeanin' of I : all ? Is tbat wh e you're bmi ( tola' * T I- In' after erenln' when mother an' me thought JOB WAS at the Lvwdtat ? Say j-omethla' , nan ! Are you Mtnek clean daaib ? " I i The scornful look had left JMl's face and the sus wtlon ot a triumphant smile plaved | around tbe corners ot his mouth as he , watched the eacMlve states of his t brother's collapse. Hut malice was not a I part ot Joel Blrdsell's makeup. He answered , the dencot > > question with a question"You 1 ain't forgot , William. " he Mked seriou ly. "the day you an' me signed the plwJpe back , In Vermont' Well. I've kept my share of It | to this day. But I never signed a pledge not to get married. " "Dot you didn't tell us. " " 1 didn't have nothln' for sure to tell till last night. You know how courtln' Is. Wil liam. A man don't like to speak right out " Once again tbe deacon swallowed some thing that seemed to choke his words. "God bless you both. " he said , and his voice trembled as he spoke. Then he added quickly : "Perhaps you'll forget the hard tfclngs I said. You see " "It's just the same as If you hadn't ever ppoke 'em , " Joel Interrupted "An' now per haps there's time yet to go over to the creamery. Supposln' you tell Martha about It while I'm gone. " Tb quavering notes of a song awakened the deacon from n deep brown study as he stood alone in the middle of the storeroom floor. Listening , he caught the words until they were lost In the rattle of tbe wagon wheels ; Bet my money on th oW bay man\ Somebody bet on th gray. The deacon did not stir until the sound baJ died away in the distance. Then he left the barn and slowly walked up the path to the farmhouse. As he reached the pnrch he hesitated a moment. "Darn my fool picture , " he said to himself. " 1 might have knowed it' But It's a good joke on mother , anyhow' " Then he entered the kitchen , closing the door behind him. CAlt VA.MSIII3S. Onr of llic MoM Ilotiui rktil.lc Vrol- tlrnt * In lllory of Knllronillni ; . , The most remarkable of all railroad ac cidents occurred on the Chicago & Alton railroad near Atlanta , 111. , last Sunday night , . when a loaded car jumped out of a freight train and lodged in a ditch and the train coupled up and reached its destination with out the crew either knowing that an acci dent had occurred or missing the car from the train. Charles Bragnell of Roodhouse. 111. , the conductor of the train , tells the story. He ea ys : "When I delivered my train I was- toM that I was a car short. I thought a mis take must have been made in checking me up. I was called up for an explanation. The clerical record showed plainly enough that I had taken out of East St Louis a car of hard coal that I had never delivered. I had lost It some place between East St. Louis and Bloomlngton. I couldn't explain It. We had made up a heavy train , put two engines in front of It and a caboose behind It. and when I delivered it would have sworn that it stood just as we had made it up , and that every car left or added along the line was accounted for. "The next morning one of the passenger crews reported a coal car wrecked In the ditch near Atlanta. When It was looked up it proved to be the car I had lost. Tbe su perintendent asked me why I had not TP- ' ported the wreck. It was news to me and It was news to the whole crew We knew- nothing about It. It seems Imposfible that It could have occurred and not have been seen , but it did. If I had read of such a' ' thing happening upon another road I would not have believed it. | 'The car that jumped out of my train was the eleventh behind the engine. It was loaded with hard coal and I suppose we were running something o\er twenty miles an hour where the car jumped out. The train was coupled up with automatic coup lers and when this car left its place tbe twelfth car , just behind it. came up and coupled on at the rear of the tenth car. " i The Chicago & Alton experts have agreed that this remarkable loss of a car out of the middle of a rapidly running train of ( twenty-one loaded cars can be explained In but one way. The flanpe of a front truck wheel upon tbe car wrecked is broken and just below the point where the car lodged the ties are marked as though bv a car off the track. The coupler ? catch with what. Is commonly known as "the Indian grip. " ! catching automatically. When tbe flange ofj the coal car broke , it Is reasoned , the car1 left the track at that end and uncoupled Itself from the car ahead by pulling one of the couplers , or hands , below the plane of the other. At the same time the coupler at the other end sank below tbe plane of Its mate and uncoupled the car there , and by some peculiar wrench , the uncoupled car was shot out of the train and left fifty feet from the track , while tbe trainmen w re all unconscious how very near they had been to a bad wreck and death. , It Is related among railroad men that an occurrence very like that at Atlanta happened years ago on the l/ehlgh Valley , where a car left its train and rolled down a long embankment and Into a thick under brush just leafing in early summer. The trainmen did not se the car go and It was not known tbat they had lost it until the train was checked up and a car proven missing. In a little while the greening vegetation entirely hid it and the disap pearance of the car of valuable merchan dise became the chief mystery of the road. When the leaves fell In the autumn the car was found and the freight which filled it was recovered with very little l"ss The lost car of tbe Lehlgh was not , though , as remarkably lost as the Chicago & Alton car , for tbe LehlKh car was tbe last upon a train and could easily escapo. while the Chicago & Alton car left tbe middle of the train. Dr. B'tll's Cough Syrup cures bronchitis. Whv suffer when this wonderful remedy can be had for only iac a bottle. Vrpi'lnntlcin MiirU * . Louisville Commercial- Genial Jim Camp was a much disgusted man nt the opera Thursday night. There was Zellc de Lus- win trilling haunting little gypsy melodies as If she were indeed of the Romany ra-e. and yet the big audience treated her with a silence that was almost appalling. That was tbe case at first. Of course they awoke and after they recov ered from their self-consciousness gave the great ginger and actress tbe pluudlts ehe BJ richly merited. But this incident occurred during the period of silence "Did you ever pee such an audience ? " exclaimed Jim , fretfully ; "they don't seem to like her work ! " i "Ob. no. tbat isn't so , " raid a bright girl sitting next to him. "The men can't ap plaud because they have been vaccinated , and the women can't stamp their dainty feet for tbe same reason. " Jim relapsed Into grim silence. | , A I'uiir Sjif-llrr. Boston Pilot It was not Artemus Ward nf whom such a remark was made , but It was Artemus Ward himtelf who said "Some kind person has fern me f'baw i e-r s poems. Mr. C bad talent , but be couldn't epel. No man has a right to be a lltrary mnn cnless he knows how to spel It Is a pity tbat Chawcer , who had geneyus was so unedicated. He's tbe wus speller I know of. " Neglect of a Cough or Sore Throat often results in an Incurable Long Disease or Comramption. For relief in Throat troubles useBEOWS's _ BEO.NCHUL TEOCHES , & gin- pie yet effective remedy. Sold only in boxes. 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