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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Jan. 3, 1892)
10 THE OMAHA DAILY BEI1 ; : SUNDAY , JANUARY 3 , 1892-SIXTEEN PAGES , "STORIES OF FROSTIER LIFE. . Stirring Personal Experiences in the Vsn- guard of Civilization. LIVELY TIMES IN NCRIH NEBRASKA , Indian NruriM , Clnlm .lumping ntifl.Jny- ImnhliiB In Ncnmm--Tulo ! nf u ToMinitor Hriilpril Nmr J'ort Kriirney. Perhaps , for n man of his ago , John W. Cnrnoy has soon as much of pioneer lifo In northwestern Nebraska as any white man living. Knowing this to bo the case from hearsay 1 was anxious to got him into conversation. Mr. Carney is a quiet , noncommunl- cntlvo person until you strike the right chord. I am very fond of a mixture of lonojack and porlquo. Happily I dis covered John had the same weakness. So with this between us and pipes whoso long faithful service had made them dear to us In moro ways than ono , wo sat talking ono evening. Looking at him through a dense cloud of smoke I remarked : "They toll mo , John , you are an old cowboy and Indian lighter ; that you came here in tin early day when north west Nebraska was a rendezvous for bud Indians and 'numerous gangs of "rust- lore. " "Yes , " ho replied ; "I cnmo here from Mntagondn , Texas , In the sprinc of ' 78 , ever the old Chotopa trail with about 1,000 head tif cattle nnd was employed asx cowboy by Dave Rankin on the Middle "Lonp rivor. AH for being an Indian fighter I never lay claim to that dis tinction. " "Still you had Indians here at that time ; they wore certainly not all good Indians ? " "Oh , no ; far from it Our ranch was established on Middle Loup river near vvlioro Soncca Is now. Wo were very busy fencing in a pasture about forty miles square the first spring , which wis afterwards ordered torn down by the government , and many a homesteader has fenced his claim with wire and posts stolen from this tonco. Uowovor , during the four years It remained standing they were Unmolested and our cattle increased until nt general round up they counted 23,000 head. Ono morning in December John Dougherty and myself rode up the river about eight miles when wo encountered thirteen Cheyenne braves who were just returning from a raid on North Platto. The minute the Indians caught sight of us oijrht of thorn charged with a war whoop that rangthrough the hills and made our hair stand on end. Wo wheeled our ponies and began a running flght back to camp. As wo , were freshly mounted wo soon outdistanced thorn and they gave up the chose. Ono of their ponies was killed bfr our shots , but wo were glud enough to lot them proceed back to the agency peacefully. Wo could not convince ours-olvos 'that wo had , lost any Indians and were there fore not hunting them. This story I do not toll In support of my detective abil ity. Word came to our camp from South Loup to look out for Jack Nolan , a no torious horse .thfof , ono of "Doc" Mid- dloton's gang , who was coming our way , and a reward of $500 was of fered for his capture dead orniivo. J. D. Lawson by the way , this saoio LAW- SOU Is now with Buffalo Bill's show and does the roping act and myself were camped on about what wo thought would ho Nolan's route. Wo talked ever the matter of his capture and laid plans of how we would invlto him in to supper. While I was to hand him a cup of coffee Jim was to got the drop on him ; then wo would march him to the authorities , so- pure the reward and of course whack up. A few days after this plan was laid , a young man mounted on a tired ponv rode up itnd nskod for something to oat. Wo gave him a good meal , fed his horse and ho con cluded to slay all night. So wo ail three slept in the same bunk. Wo asked the stranger if he had hoard about Jack Nolan and told him of our plan to make the capture and pocuro the reward. Ho was right in with us , said ho would help nnd if ho hoard of Nolan's whereabouts would notify us. Ho scorned to bo a thoroughly good follow. Next morning , after breakfast , wo helped him baddlo his horse and' gave him a plug of tobacco , as ho said ho had none and was out of monoy. After mounting his horse ho turned to us and said : "Now , boys , if you want Jack Nolan , here ho is ; come and got mo" at the same time producing a forty-live. Wo assured him that wo were the best friends Jack ever hud and bogged that ho would ride on his way with our best wishes. Wo spent most of that day kicking our selves and accusing oncli 'other ' of being : v sucKor. Right after this incident I hired to McCnnn ranch , thirty miles west efFort Fort Niobrara , as stock detective , and was sent out alter a young would-be desperado , who had stolen six head of horses. I started out on horseback on his trail alone in November. Learning from Pat Pattorbon , nn oht cow-puncher of Kearney Junction , then a place of about 500 people , that my man was mak ing for Noeloy , I loft my pony and took a train for Fremont and from there ever thoElkhorn Valley toNooloywhich was then the end of that lino. I arrived at Noeloy early In the morning and learned my stolen horses were on n homestead about six miles west. I at otico walked to the place and made up my mind to look around the farm before letting ray business bo known , in hopes of running onto the horbos , but a largo watch dog objected to such proceedings , aim pressed his alTectlons so forcibly that I was obliged to climb a tree to escape being torn to pieces. It was in this po sition the farmer found mo nnd I wns obliged to make my errand known and establish ' my legal rights from this elevated position , but the farmer 11 n ally said ho had the property I wanted , called his dog off and treated mo nlcoly. I took the horses to back to Kearney Junction and turned them ever to Goorpo Taylor , McCan's foreman , but the thief was never caught that I know of. Those two attempts ut doteotlvo work were my only experience in that line , and as you see 1 was not Altogether successful , so I concluded to come back and ride for old Dave Itankln nt Seneca again. It was soon alter my return that n band of Sioux Indiana had n battle with dtlzons under the loader- ihipof Major and Luke North , Buck Taylor nnd John Alexander , on Blro- vrood rivor. This bund of Indians had followed Forbes' gang ot horco thiuvos , who stole quito a buuch of horsoa from the agency nnd succeeded in getting to North Platte , whore they disposed of them. The hauled Indians then com menced raids on Bottlers , stealing stock and plundering houses , and blurted back to the oponcy , whore they wore over taken on Blruwood and-routed , the oltt. zons killing several nnd losing ono man , secured all the stolen stock and valua- ulos. It was a part nf this bund that the fcoldlors soon afterwards mercilessly massacred nt Fort Robinson , killing women and children. The country was BO full of rustlers that it was unsafe to ride among strangtirs Unions yoil were provided with good letters. The In dians in the agency suffered most from this cratt. A band of Ohoyonnos came to our ranch in Sonocn , nskod for some thing to cat , which was given , but Itdld not eult thorn. They wont to the store house , helped thomsolvo , then cut out eight of our host horses , drove them oft to the ngoncy rltrht before our eyes in daylight. Wo concluded it was best to let them go , and sent Al Pratt and Jim Lawson to the ngcncy to recover them through the Indian agent , McfJilll- cudy As soon as they hoys reached the ngoncy they were arrested for horse thieves the Indians , thinking they were part of Forbcs'gnng. ' The ugonthnd grout dllllculty In saving their lives , by putting-thorn In the block house and escorting thorn out after nlaht by a pqund of Indian pollco. They were only too glad to escape with their lives , and never recovered the horses. "Tho most dangerous part of our duty wnH 'ridintr lino. ' Two of our men- Billy Williams and Felix James were returning to camp ono evening : _ While crosslnc a ford they wore surprised by two Indians cominir down on thorn over the bluffs , shooting and yelling. Billy's horse was killed , throwing him to the ground and badly hurling him , while Felix was well mounted and armed. Williams called to his friend , "For God M sake don't , leave mo ; they will kill mo. " But Felix Jnmos did not possess the nerve and generous solf--sacrifioo so char acteristic of the western cowboy. Ho rode on to safety as fast as his horse could carry him and left his comrade to bo butchered. After reaching the top of the surrounding hills ho looked back and saw Williams beating oil the rod devils with the butt end of his giln. Ono arm had already been shattered bv a bullet nnd hung limp by his side. His lifo wns prolonged only to satisfy the revenge of his hideous tormentors. Williams was riddled by bullets before help from the ranch could reach him , and ills slayers were on their way back to the agency. " John Cnrnoy is now fireman on the Burlington lino. Ho has a cozy homo and pretty family of little girls. His day dream is of the time when ho will pull the throttle on ono of the Burling ton's Pugot' sound fast mall trains. Karly Inyn In Xoinulm. Inthosummor of 1850 , the settlers were somewhat annoyed by bands of roving Indians ; but on oao occasion a man named Edwards became familiar with Indian scalping. A few stray Omahasmastatoof Intoxication scalped Ed wards and loft him to die on the prairlos , but wonderful to relate Ed wards recovered , and is alive to tho' present day. The settlers becoming alarmed for fear of an Indian outbreak , organized a company called the "Homo Guards , " In 18. > G , the llrst military organization in the county , but wonder ful to relate , they were never called upon to face the dreaded rod man. O. F. Lake was captain of the company. "Claim jumping , " the prolific source of many personal colHsions In newly settled frontier communities , was not the en u so of much blood shedding in Nosiahu county. They did occur , oc casionally , ho wo vac. On May 20 , 1857 , Thomas Gallagher , a nntivo of Toronto , Canada , attempted to "jump" the claim of Joromiuh Campbell , near the town of Brownvlllo , and paid for his rashness by the loss of his lifo. The act of Gal lagher was both illegal and ill-advised. The popular feeling was1 unmistakably With Campoll , and a subsequent investi gation justified his not. This was the llrst affair of the kind in the county , and although there were frequent col lisions , it is believed to bo the only case that had a fatal termination. To prevent - vent the evils of claim jumping , a claim protection society for Nomaha was organized at Peru in 1850 , and the promptness with which its olllcors and members acted in all disputed cases , tended to greatly lesson the number of private fouds. Rov. H. S. Horn , S. A. Chambers , Rov. "W. Frame , A. Medley and other law abiding citizens were prominent in the society. At a little later day horse stealing became a for midable evil with which the ourly bottlers tlers were forced to contend. To own a span or moro of work horses was a sine qua non to the dwellers on farms and depredations of horse thlovos bocumo so frequent and alarming that on Satur day , August 7 , 1858 , a largo mooting was hold at the county seat to provide moans of protection from the night rid- ors. R. J. Whilnov was ohosen presi dent ; W. H. Donman , vice president ; S. W. Kennedy , treasurer , and S. M. Mc- Comas , secretary. A permanent organ ization with the same list of ofllcors was oiToctod. The main design of the soci ety will bo explained by the follo.wing section of tholr constitution : ' "Upon any horse or mule belonging to any member of the association baing stolen , It shall bo the loser's duty to no tify sqmo officer of the association , who shall "notify such a number of the ton riders as ho may doom requisite of the Tact , nnd it shall bo the duty of the rid ers so notillod to proceed immediately in search of the property so stolen and to use all diligence , euro and labor In their | ) ewer to retake such property , and to ipnrehond the thlof or thiovos. Said riders to bo allowed besides all nocos- sury and reasonable oxpousos the sum of SI per day as n compensation for their services in that behalf. And It shall bo the duty of the president upon the application of such riders ind evidence that such services have boon rendered , to draw an order on the treasurer for the amount , which order mall be attested by the secretary. " i'ho rntdors were William Hays , Jesse Cole , J. W. Coleman , J. VV. Bliss , J. Norfslngor , Louis Neal , N , iTontonollo , David Plasters , E Reid , J. Small. The rganip.utlon maintained a vigorous ox- [ stance until horsa thieves learned that Nomaha county was dangerous ground on which to practice tholr nefarious culling. JAY IIAWKIXO. , This word , of Kansas coinage , had n dreaded significance on the borders during the years of the rebellion. Until the luttor part ot 1801 the people of Nomaha county and southeastern Ne braska enjoyed comparative immunity from their visits. On the 17th of Oc tober the ; Brownvlllo Advertiser said ot thorn : "So far as our knowledge of them extends , tholr operations are retaliatory or hilllctod upon man who nro open or avowed traitors. " An incident of a Richardson county unionist who was robbed by the jay hawkers of a pair of horses but learning his politics , the property wns roturnud to him. IIo had only to satisfy the robbers of his loyalty. Missouri unionists in counties contigu ous to Nebraska were cnpturod by jay hawking bands , but released whim it was found that they were not rebels. A few months Inter the public mind under went a change on the sublooU An "anti- jayhawk" mooting was hold at Brown vlllo , Saturday , December 14,1801 , pre sided ovur by J , H. Mann , Messrs. J. R Crow , Judge 0. W. Wheeler , Judge O. D. Ilowott , Richard Brown nnd T. W. Bedford. A committee on resolutions re ported : "Thoro is reason to suppose that our civil laws in the present unsettled condition of affairs , will not afford the people of this vicinity that protection io which thoyiaro entitled in quiet and peaceful times ; therefore , "Resolved , That wo will use all moans for the protection of the lives and prop erty of these jjorsons who have or muy enter into this orgnnlzatloh ftiid "who shall take the oath to support the con stitution of the United States. "Resolved , That any person who re fuses to outer Into this organt7iltl6n for the general protection of the lives and property ol our citizens , has no lawful right to expect protection of our hands. " It was further resolved by the citizens Hint thuy would not recognize the right of any party of men to come Into Nomaha county for the purpose of jay- hawking or robbing citizens without process of law. It was further ngrt-od to perfect a military organization. At this time it became apparent to all that the true definition of jayhawklng signi fied a thief and that the prime object of the jayhiiwkors was robbery * All men were Invited to join thorn mid tho.so who refused were considered fair 'gamo and to rob such persons was deemed proper , The last of December an anti-jayliawk military company was organized in Brown villo for self-protection. This movement mot the approbation qf Major General Hunter , commandinc the De partment of Kansas , who wrote to Judge Wheeler under date of December ! 27,1SO J ; "You must organize for mutual pro tection and support. " . ' At this time there were throe distinct bands of jayhawkers ranging the county nnd robbing the people , each charging the ether with being ihoro thieves and nil tolling the exact truth. , That moro depredations were not com mitted by irresponsible lawless parlies the people of Nomaha county and especially Brownvlllo , are largely in debted to Judge Wheolor. Judge Ilowitt , J. E. Crow , J. II. Mann , J. ' LI. Morrison , S. W. Bedford , Richard Brown and the members of the nnti-juy- liawk company. The most notorious of the jayhnwk lenders was called Captain Cleveland. Ho came to Brownvillo on ono occasion with a squad of seven men all armed to the teeth. A personal difllcultv occurred between Cleveland and a half-drunkon cltizon in which the latter was worsted. Fearful of a general fight some of the * more prudent cltizons called a meeting nnd invited the attendance of Captain Cleveland. lie promptly responded , bringing with him ono of his company , both of them well equipped with navy revolvers. By request of the chairman Captain Cleveland nddiossod thy moot ing in a speech breathing strong loyalty to the government and expressing his peaceful disposition toward all who stood by the old ling ( moaning those who took his O'Uh ) . His promises were somewhat comforting to the citizens , but fearing that ho had power to capture the town if so disposed and Knowing that the oath to which his mon sub scribed * denounced all men us disloyal who refused to join his biMid , there was much uneasiness until the jayhawkers departed for the upper part of the county. In Peru Cleveland's baud committed u few depredations and oiio of ills men shot and slightly wounded a man named Long. Thinking his head quarters in Kansas a moro congenial clime , Captain' Cleveland decamped and to make his retreat moro certain and less harrassing , ho captured the sheriff of the county ( J. W. Columan ) , nnd hold him until ho crossed the Nomaha river when the otllcor was released. The shorilT was well treated by his captors and was furnished an excellent dinner. Captain Cleveland was a shrewd follow and did not want a sheriff's posse of one or two hundred men at ills heels. After roturh- ing to Kansas Cleveland's offenses against law bcc.iino so bold and flagrant that Major General .Hunter issued a special order for his extermination. IIo was trucked a'nd. killed by United Stalds troops in ISUa. ' - | lie Fit the lU-ilshliis. "Yes , I have had some acquaintance with Indians , but though they gave ma some marks to remember thorn by , I do not care to renew tholr acquaintance. " said an old frontiersman to some young people who were eager to hear nn Indian story. ' However , before I toll you about It , 1 will show you the proof , " said " ho. "You see this bald spot on the "top of my head. Well , that was madb by an Indian scalping knife. Here in iny loft arm and side is the mark of a bullet they gave mo , and in each heel is the print of nn arrow thrust. " As ho spoke ho proceeded to remove such of his clothing as was necessary , and Showed an ugly scar in his arm , and one in each heel. "Shortly after the war there was a great deal of teaming done across the prairie to dllToront points west. I was a young man then and liking the wild rude lifo I hired out us teamster to n company who were hauling supplies from the Missouri river to Fort Kearney. Wo sot out with a train of twenty wagons and several moro mon. Wo were all in line spirit and as our train wound slowly along ever hill , through ruvinound across long stretches of level country , I realized the grandeur und vastness of the great west. "Thoro were some Indian troubles at the time but not in that part of the country , and as wo wore all well armed a military escort was not doomed neces sary. "All went well until thp last day of our journey. Wo wcrowltliln two miles of the fort , nnd rojolcing on our safe ar rival , when , as wo passed along a hill side which afforded thorn abiding place , a troop of hostllo Indians suddenly sprung upon us , with wild yells and crlos. All woro'thrown Into confusion. The suddenness of the surprise , and the superior force of our enemy , gave us little chance to defend or dis tinguish ouroolvos , for In loss tlmo than I am tolling it nearly all of our number were stretched upon the prairie either dead or woundoa. I was riding a pony and holding the rein in my loft hand and with my right was using my weapon to thohosl advuntapo whan a ball struck my loft arm , making n llosh wound in my arm nnd sido. At the same tlmo my pony was shot and in falling I was caught under him. It wns impossible for mo to ox tt lea to my golf. On the next Instant an Indian had taken my scalp and loft mo for dead. I con cluded it was safest to bo dead for the tlmo , so I lay perfectly still and lifeless to all appearance. "Some moro came up.and to make sure that I wns dead they thrust an arrow In ouch heel , but as I made no cry or luovo they concluded lifo was extinct a'nd left mo. - , "How It was I did not flinch when they thrust the arrow In my heels I cannot toll , for It was the most severe pain I ever suffered. I think the pony lying on my back and logs must have helped to keep mo from moving. "Tho firing was hoard nt the fort and they came to our rescue , but'not until the Indians had plundered our wagons and made good tholr escape , The sol diers took us to the fort , and those ot u'a who had any life left were kindly cared for until wo recovered , but I do not euro for any moro Indian fighting. .My head was along tlmo healing , but itpot well at last , and now , unless they know mystery story , no ono suspects the bare snot on the top of my head to be moro than a case of ordinary baldness. " Notice. Unscrupulous dealers have boeu deteotod ioHlnu spurtoui Bitten under tbo name of Intlm and Indian Hlttora ofour "Ken nedy's East India Hitters. " Wo shall prosecute all such persons to the full oxtout of the law. Our "Eiut India" Hilton nro never sold in bulk. Call for the conuluo , wMch are manufactured and bottled only by ounMvoi nnd under our trade mark label. lusu-i. Co. SHORT Rip OF SUNSHINE , iV . Qloauod from"tli'o Hum-Drum of Work-a- Lifo , t. . ii-i MERRY TALES " TOLD BY MASTERS , Tender Itcmnrlft Ororhrnnl lit n Hoof - of CoiMclcuco tit Current The Icoyholo reporter of the Philadel phia I'ros-i folded his our over SOLIO queer remarks ut sx recaption : "Will vou hour nioV" said a man to a girl. "Probably , " bho replied , "but I can't promise to listen. V A follow salil to pretty woman : "Can I see you homo ? " ( "You may try , " she smilingly mur mured ; "that's my husband coming up stairs. " Sometimes the feminine- sarcasm was bestowed on a member of the same sex , A girl said to another : "Do you think ho liked moV "t hoard him say ho found you very amusing , " was the reply. Another dialogue began with : "I am engnired to Bob Grant. ' "I am so glad , " the companion girl exclaimed - claimed , "t waa so all-aid ho never would got over his niTali-with mo. " In ono instance an exchange ot confi dences began with : "Mario , I quarreled with Georp-0 and told him never to call again. " "But he will , " the other said , sooth ingly. " 1 know , hut wo are going to move to morrow , and J forgot to give him the now number. " A matron was shielding her daughter in a quiet nook , .so ihatnho might hastily tie her gaiior. "Kate , ' ' the mother whispered , "bo careful , there is a man over thc-ru who can sue you. " Kato demurely responded : "O , pshuw , maipina , ho doesn't know I know he's tho.'o. " J'olltlru ! I'linerlx. Says .Tudgu Waxem in the Detroit Free Press : t A congressman is jist about 330 times smaller in Washington than he Is in his own decstriek. , Congressmen like io see public econ omy praclist every whore except in their own doostriulcd. A statesman ain't really dissatlsfido till ho gits the whitu housu fovor. Defect cures some atatu mon. it takes a inljjhu-bij , ' stiitosnrui not Io fool kinder smiill 'jkb .when an odditor come1 * around.- ' - Party leodera'c uldont do much if it wnsont for thohvh'ool hoses to do the nullln. % * , A man that cum vole and wont vote , wouhlent lite for'his Country unless ho liad to. "Tr a Money is n ppwr in politicks , but thar would b'a politicoes if thar wnscnt any money. " ' I reckon thac .WJJUld bo more uiorrols In politick of th-.iK was moro demand f r thorn. Politicklo wluunen aint good for mutch " A Cutni > r CiiMtrJiMicr. " Texas Siftinj > ' = fi"r.o"o1v here , Matilda , " "said tflftd.v to'il/ha colored cook , "you , , fllcup right 'd < ' W8 TO ihy ehic'lton house , and you must . 'haVo'heiiud thoBo thieves stealing the chicUon hi'it night. " ' "Yes , jna'atn , "I 'hccred the chickens holler and heurort da voices of do men. " "Why didn't you go out , then , or why didn't you wuko Us up ? " " 'C.iho. ma'am [ bursting into tears ] , 'case , ma'am , i knowa myo'.dfriddor was out Oar , and I wouldn't hab him know I's lost confidence in him for all do chickens in do world. If I had none out dar and colchud him , it would hab broke his ole heart , and ho would hab made mo tote do chickens homo foah him ; be sides , ho done told mo day before flat ho'a gwino tor pull do chicken * last night. " A Notflty in "V..uits. " . The following queer atlvertiiemonts recently appeared in an English boot and shoo iournal : Wanted , a good hand-slabber ; also a girl to linibh olT. Wanted , a girl for socking. Wanted , active youth who can cut Iocs. Iocs.Wanted Wanted , a sjood Hkivor. Hand-crosses wanted ; full , constant work. Wanted , hand-sown men , os uar pair , 1 1 edge. Wanted , log-cuttor. _ Wanted , a sharp lad , to punch and eyelet. Wanted , a good eccentric cutting pros , cheap. Wanted , competent crup shaver ; none others need apply. Wanted , a competent pressman , used to looking up. Wanted , a good table currier. ToliiKK " lfi i'try. Kew l"'s ' lleinhl The sonson is approaching when The jjlrl unil her IOUCK man Will RO tobognanlnif upon Tills siraplo , easy plan. ToboRgans , though , soniatltnos will strika A stone anU spoil one's bins , And then the man mid maid will sliiio um umt Phlhidolnhlua'B'roiw ! * "Sure , sir , I wants a pair of'.bliqos. ' " "For yoursoHV'lw "No , sure.1 ' I > ni "WhoforV" , ' ' "For Miko. " - , ( "Your husband ? " " .No , Indado.IJo can buy bis own. " "Oh , your son ? "That's righlC4' "GaltV" " " ' ' "Bo gorra , ho'lll ' that. Don't you hoar him outside bolm'ttlng ' boouuso I said I'd " ' ' got "Kiiucklilljr , "Charley Jetflilns Is going over to your house a good deal ndw , isn't ho ? ' asked Maud. "Yes , " said Abigail. "Good deal of clash to him , isn'i Micro ? " "No. I wish there wore moro. " "Why ? " "Oil. if ho used dashes instead of the horrible InngiMgo ho indulges In occns lonnlly , Ma conversation would ho more enjoyable to n proper young lady like mo. " "Ohl" "Ohl"A A Hard Itcarli'il CiiiltulM. | An able bodied tramp stopped In front of a well known citizen of Now York , says Texas Sittings , and said m a whin ing tone : "Please , sir , give mo some assistance. I have no friends or family. I am homeless - loss nnd frlondloes. " "You are ? Well , then , If you have no fricnda to borrow from you , and no family to support , and are not expected to contribute to the Grant monument or the silver plate service for the Now York , you are bettor olT than I am. You might have money to lend. I say , lend mo a qunrtor , " but the man without any responsibilities passed on without con tributing a cent. Tuilfd 1,11(0 It. Magistrate You arocharged , sirwith soiling liquor on Sundays. Prisoner Never sold a drop , jedgo. "But hero Is a reputable witness who entered your saloon by the back-door last Sunday , cal.ed for a drink , received a bottle and glass , poured out a liberal quantity , drunk It , null paid for It. " "Does ho sav It was licker , jcdgc ? " "llo says It tasted like liquor. " "Well I'malaw-abidin'citl7cn , jedgo , - I am. That there follor tried to break th' law' by buyln' licker of mo , but I , didn't hell him no licker , no , sir. " "What did you soli him ? " "It was a temperance drink , iotlgo , made up of turpuntino an' kerosene , rod pepper an' such things , judgo. It wasn't licker , jedgo ; it only tabled like it. " Colt unit Suvnn. This recalled ono of Sheridan's talcs of an Irishman who mctjx Briton of the true John Bull pattern , standing with folded arms in n contemplative mood , apparently meditating on the greatness of his little island , says the Washington Post. "Al ow mo to differ with yel" exclaimed - claimed the Colt "But t have said nothingsir , " replied John But ) . "But a man may think a Ho'as well as publish it , " persisted the pugnacious Hibernian. "Perhaps you arc looking for light ? " queried the Briton. "Allow me Io compliment yoz on the quickness of your perception , " said Patrick , throwing down nis coat , and then they pitched In. Competition , The desirability of care in expression can hnruly bo too forcibly impressed noon those who write advertisements , circulars and public ant'ouncomonts of all sorts , SUB the Youth's Companion. A very peculiar olf-jct was produced by the. following aniiounj-amont , con tained in the advertibomonts of a county fair : "Among other attractive features of this great fair there will bo highly amusing donk'oy races and pig races. "Competition in tlioso two contests open to citizens of tha county only. " A Hint to the \Viso. Detroit Free Press : "So you are going to write to the girl's father to ask him for her , are you ? " "Ycrt. " ' , " " "Why don't you go and see him in person ? " ' The mail is hotter , I guoss. " "I think not. " "But I do. " "Como oil' . Why is it ? " "Oh , wall , the old jjont won't choke the letter , or hit it in the nock , or kick it down stairs , or anything like that , don't you know. " Why MID UuiiKUtT It. Now York Times : "Why , mamma ! What did you got that for ? ' ' exclaims n prudent daughter * in 11 you've-dono-it- njmin sort of a tone that betokens doubt ol the mother's sanity. * " 1 I oh , dear me , Nottio. I got it because it was so pretty I couldn't help it ! Isn't it lovely i1" "What are you going to trim with it ? ' "Oh , I don't know but Isn't ' it pretty ? " IJnpilrdon.liilo Omlssiun , Chicago Tribune : "In writing up this execution , " observed the city editor , "you have nindo an unpardonable omis sion. " "I I thouirht I got all the facts , " fal tered the now roportor. "No , " rojoineu the city editor , kindly , but lirmlvT "you did not. You failed to say 'thy doomed man slept soundly the night previous to his execution. ' " How lie Ciimu'to Know It. Texas Siftings : "Witness , wore you present when the light took place ? " "I was. " "Will you please explain how it hap pened ? " "I was sitting quietly at a table drink ing beer , when , without my booing him , a lollowcamo up behind mo and furnished a beer mug all to Hinders on iho top of my bond. Tint's what called my atten tion to the affair. " Could Oulet Her Confidence. "Your husband bought you n seal skin sacquo with his winnings at pokor. I wonder how you could wear it ? " "Oh , that's all right. Urn going to wear it at church , you know , and that will bo lighting the devil with his own weapons. " Ho Murlcuttiil All Ho Wrote. Kato Field's 'Washington : "Ho's a young writer of promise. All the work lie does commands interest. " . "Ah"indeed ! What Is his specialty ? " "Engrossing mortgages. " Dr. Blrnoy cures catarrh. Boo bldg Liltlo Carrie was somewhat surprised , upon looltlng into the lion's nest , to llnd a porcelain egg in It. The next morn ing the hen loft her nest , cackling loudly over a now achievement. Carrie secured the egg , brought it to her mother , and said : "That old hon'a a silly thing. Just listen to her cackling all over the yard ! Why , yesterday she laid a door knob and didn't make half oo much fuss about itl" PLEASED READ _ THIS. © O Cents a pound for VAN HOUTEN'S COCOA ( "Best & Goes Farthest" ) seems to be high. Let us compare it with the price of Coffee : lib. of good coffee costs at least 30c. , makes 31 haH.plnt cups. . 93 ' " " 3 therefore OOc. , 1 "V.H.COCOA" also OOc. , " ICO " " " 'Which ' is the Cheaper Drink ? "WB j 93 oups of Coffee , ( I6O " "V.H.Cocoal Sold by every Grocer. in The UNPRECEDENTED SUCCESS that the Behr Bros. & Co's. PI Hate nUnhird , nnd HID high prnUo they liarc ollclloil from ( ho uorhlN MOST III.- NOWNK1) ) ARTISTS , from Hie press nml from u public long projiullrcd In favor of liicr makes , It is wife to assume that tliu instriimrnl mint ho possimo.l of L'NCOM MON AT'f UIIJUTIIS. UIIJUTIIS.MAX MEYER & BRO. CO. , Sole Agents , Omaha , Nebraska. Established iS66. CUT THIS OUT Painless. Less PainNo Pain. . The wondeVful local annsthetlc used only by DR. BAILEY la relieving hundreds of people of the agony usually existing in hav ing toelh extracted. By the UBO of this harmless drug teeth are ex tracted absolutely without pnln of danger , the pntlont. being per fectly conscious nil the tlmo , but the sensibility of the tissue around the place whsro applied being entirely gone. No extra charge for using this wonderful drug. $5.00 , A Full Set of Five Dollars a TEETH Sit And a ON RUBBER GoodFit Fo'r Five Dollars Every 7 imc. Tei'tli Without I'lutos. Komovablo IlrlrtRO Work ut prtooi llttlo jnoro than for n rilblior liliitc. Gold 1 Illinn mid nil work puritUnlni ; to dentistry at lowest rules. R. . W. BAILETY , D. DS. . OFFICES THIRD FLOOR PAXTON BLOCK. TELEPHONE , 1O8B. 1GTH and FARNAM ST5. , Entrance on lOth WOOD'S ' IGE TOOLS RUN IRON , ROPE 2 BLOCK'S . * Send for catalogue. Jas. Morton Son $ Go IB 11 . , Dolsre Street. OF OMAHA. ABSOLUTELY INCANDESCENT FIRE PROOF , ELECTRIC LIGHTS PERFECT- NOT A DARK VENTILATION OFFICE IN THE BUILDING , NIGHT AND DAY ELEVATOR 68 VAULTS. SERVICE , DIRECTORY OF OCCUPANTS : GROUND FLOOR : M.C. NAUaLR COMPANY , Tologrnpli i'oles. CITY TREASURER. Cross Tics , Lumber , oto. OMAHA UTCAT , nsi'ATK ANT ) TRUST 00. JIU1H & OAYLOUI ) , lloul Kstato. J. T ) ANTES , liolui.aa Olsar Stand. OlTVCOMl'TKOW.EIt WOMEN'S EXUIIANUE. FIRST FLOOR : TI1K OMAHA IIEK COUNTING UOOM , Ad- I-'HANU L. nniCVFS & CO , , Contractors. rot-Using and KulHcrljiUon Dopartmonts. WESTBUN UNION TEliEUKAI'il Ol'TlO AMKUIUAN WATEU WOltlCS COMPANY. OUNTUAIy LOAN AND TKIJST CO. SUI'KKINTENOKNT UEE HUII.UINO. SECOND FLOOR. THE I'ATiUCK IANl ) COMPANY , Owners THE EQUITAULE LIFE ASSURANCE SO- of Thindoo IMitec. 01ETY OF NEW YORK , DK. II. II. 1IIUNEY , Nose ami Tliro-it. CHRISTIAN SCIENCE ASSOCIATION. Oil. U1IAULE& HOSEWATElt. ANGLO-AMERICAN ' MORTGAGE & TRUST PROVIDENT SAVINGS LIKE , of Now Yoik. COMPANY. MASSACHUSETTS MUTUAL MtfB INSUR IIEE BUREAU OF CLAIMS. ANCE COM PAN i' . GRANT OULLIMORE. Oculist and Aurlat. THIRD FLOOR. JOHN GRANT , Contractor tor Street uiidSIdo- MANHATTAN LIFE INSURANCE C ( wulU Piivoinoiils. PANY. UOHEHT W. P VTKIUIC. I.uw Offleos. DR. W. . \L11RAITII. . EQUITY UOUICT NO. 1. DR. C-iUAIC H. HOFFMAN. EQUITY COURt' NO. i UNITED STATES LIFE INSURANCE CO. , LAW COURT NO , 4. of iSiiw York. J. M.OHAMIinilS. Abstracts. E. W. sniEUAL. WM. SIMERAL. b. 1C. PATTEN. DontlHt. FOURTH FLOOR. NORTHWESTERN MUTUAL Lll'K 1N3UR I' . M. ELLIH. Aroliltoet. ANOECOMPANY GEOUOE W. SUES & COMPANY , Solicitors ol PatcnlH. CONNEOT10UT MUTUAL LITE 1NSUR- H.A.WAGNER.AirutitfnrUnltodStuUiiMutuul . ANCE COMPANY. Accldont Insurance , PENN MUTUAL LIKE , INSURANCE COM Company PANY. JOHN LETIIKM. I'ubllhliur. HARTl'ORD LIKE AND ANNUITY INSURANCE - OMAHA COAL EXCHANGE. ANCE COMPANY. P. F. EICENI1ERO , Fresco Painter. ' MEAD INVESTMENT COMPANY. ALEX MOORE. Roil Eatuto mid Loatii. WEHSTER Si HOWARD , Insurauco. I10HN SASH AND DOOR CO , KDISONUENERAL ELECTRIC COMPANY. TIIE-MEROIIANI'S UKTAIL COMMERCIAL WESTERN CAR SERVICE ASSOCIATION. AGENCY. ANDREW ROSEWATER. Civil Engineer. STAPt.ETON LAND CO. J. L. 11LACIC , Civil Engineer. OMAHA RUIIIIER COMPANY. FIFTH FLOOR. HEADQUARTERS , IT. S. ARMY. DEPART CHIEF PAYMASTER. MENT OF THE PLATTE , : w OlMccs. PAYMASTER. DEPARTMENT COMMANDER. . ASSISTANT QUARTERMASTER. ADJUTANT GENERAL. . INSPECTOR SMALL ARMS PRAOTIOH. INSPECTOR GENERAL. JUDGE ADVOCATE. Oil I El'OF ORDNANCE. CHIEF QUARTERN ASTER. ENGINEER OFI'ICER. OillEK COMMISSARY OF SUBSISTENCE AIDES-DE-CAMP. MEDICAL DIRECTOR. ASSISTANT SURGEON. SIXTH FLOOR. IIAHTMAN & COLLINS. Cast Iron G.is and UNITE ! ) STATES LOAN ff INVKSPMBN WuturPlpo. ( jQMrAN a. a LA.M1JERT SMITH. THE IMPLEMENT DEALER. . II. V. I'l roil. Htonoxniuliur , G , F. UE1NDORFF , Architect. ! . . . . 0. RUED PRINTING CO. NAilll. 1.01111. U. h. ARMY PRINTING OFFICES. W. A. GOULD. Furiiis. MANUFACTURERS AND CONSUMERS AS- HAMILTON LOAN AND TRUST CO. CUrj'OlUAh ItOOMB Ul'1 ' Till : llii : : , Ooniio | KKPUmliOAN OITV AND COUNTY CEN IIIR , Hiuiuutyplnx niul MullliiK rouiun. TRAL COMMITTEE 51 , A. UPTON CO. , Koull iUto. Ui SEVENTH FLOOR. THE OMAHA IUIEH3 OLUH. i UAUIIEH SHOP. B001ETY 01 ? BTATlONAltY nXaiNKBUS. I A few more elegant olfice rooms may be had by applying to R , W. Baker , Superintendent , office on counting room flooi