THE OMAHA DAILY BEE , SUNDAY , AUGUST 23 , 1S91-SIXTEEN PAGES. 15
TALE TOLD BY A Till ! MR.
JVn All-'Round Orook and Gambler Qiv s
Hin Lifo Story.
s _
'SECRET OF ALL GAMBLING AND STEALING ,
JIow tlio Oeslro to Oet SnmclliliiK for
Nothing Jiccoiiii-H a Iln < : ano
lorVlilch Ihoro'u
No Ili'iiicdy ,
The clocU on the high school tower was an
nouncing thi ) hour of midnight as I crossed
Sixteenth street where it intersects Furnnni
mid stopped for a moment to watch for the
last motor train toward thu south ,
The night was one of nature's models.
The moon , then In the third quarter , with
the assist inco of the olectrlo light that
awlngs ever the Intersection of the two
atrools , transformed the darkness in that
immediate vicinity Into day. Innumerable
moth miller ? , butterflies and a host of other
insects were Muttering and darting about
the glittering glebe from which the dueling
rays of the olectrlo cui rent shot In nil direc
tions. A pair of bats shot hlthor and thither
llko irregular meteors , darting close to the
light and then away Into the darkness carry
ing with thorn at each trip sorno doomed and
captive insect for n feast.
An occasional pedestrian passed mo , looked
wistfully down
the street In hope of seeing ono moro motor
train moving toward Ilnnscom park , but the
last tinln had gene and with lagging stops
the straggling and belated passengers moved
on.
on.I had Just about decided to pursue the swmo
course when I noticed a man cotmnt : out of
the Omaha board of trndo building. Ho had
evidently been taking a late luncheon. Ho
came directly toward mo and as I started
ncrosH thi ) street I met him under the full
glnro uf the electric light.
"For heaven's sake , how do you do I" said
I , ns I loaned him in the fuco and recognized
the features of a playmate of my boyhood ,
whom I had not scon for tlftcon yoirs , but
concerning whoso career 1 was pretty well
posted.
"Excuse inn , sir , but I think you must bo
mistaken"said the man I had Just addressed.
"O , no. I am not mistaken , " I replied , for
with the sound of his voice every vestlgo of
doubt had vanished. "You nro Fremont
S- . "
"Hush sh sh , " ho said raising his hand
nnd speaking In a whisper. "You know mo
Jim and I know you , but by all that used to
bo near and dear to us both. J toll you I must
not bo known hero by that name. Do not
mention iho fact that you met mo or saw me.
Goodbyo. "
"But hold up u moment , " I said earnestly
ns ttio man was about to walk awav. "it
corialnly can't do you anv harm to talk with
mo n fnw moments. I have no occasion for
* netting you into trouble. "
Ir "Well , if you must talk como away from
the light , come over nero in the shadow. "
And wo walked to the steps of the Kounlzc
Memorial Lutheran church and sat down.
"Now Jim"said the playmate of my youth ,
when wo had taken seats in that
out-of-the-way place , "what Is there
that you and I can talk about. You know my
record , or a part of It at least. You know
that I am ashamed to talk to you about it. "
"Why don't you quit making a record that
you nro ashamed of , and make a man of your
self ! You are capable of better th-ings , and
you know it. "
"Yes , I admit all you say to bo true , butlot
mo toll you , Jim , after a man has onro en
tered upon my profession wo call it a pro
fession , I suppose , because there is hanlly
enough work about it to call It a trade he
seldom reforms. I have traveled u rocky
'
road since you nnd I were in school toKOtho'r
bnck there In Illinois II f teen years aero. Do
you remember howl used to beat you playing
marbles i > t the old country school house I
L'ord , hoxv I.jvlshcould llvo them days till
ever iif/alii.1
"Whv not start in now and make the best
of It rrom this out ) "
"There uro a thousand reasons , Jim , why
professional crooks and gamblers do not re
form. In the llrst place , the desire to got
something for nothing which is the fountain
head and secret sprlnc of all gambling and
Stealing becomes a sort of disease. It gets
into a man's very veins and ho cannot shako
It olT. The excitement of the gambling room ,
the ternblo hanrd .Unit must bo constantly
faced by professional cracksmen becomes a
sort of necessity in the life of the iportlng
man and the crook , and manv of them
would rather make $ u')00 ( ) a year In
that wnj than 510,000 at some logltl
mate but prosy business where the
Clements of chance nnd danger do not figure
o prominently.
"No , I tell you. It is hard to reform n sport
or a crook. You mnv reform u murderer , for
ho muy have committed the deed in the heat
of passion or anger , but this thing of pro
fessional gambling and stealing Is a plant of
deliberate growth nnd its roots take hold
very deep. I had no intention when I began
this business of ever degenerating into a
safe-blower , but I will confess to you that
1 have turned several dollars that way. In
fuct , I have made moro money by lappihi ; the
tills and going through the pockets of tender
foot than I over mailo at the game.
You remember my llrst exposure I
"Well , that cut mo up n good deal ,
but 1 soon got hardened and an arrest
now Is simply a piece of bad luck , just the
same as a spell of sickness would bo to you.
It slmplv Interfere for n time with my opera
tions.
"A man never becomes much of a success
in this line until bo has made n jail record ,
because he docs not make the acquaintance
of thu skillful men in the business. They
uro afraid to talk to a tenderfoot. Ho may
turn out to be a Month of the law or a block-
bead nnd got experienced men into trouble. "
"How many times have you been In jallj"
' 1 have had a pretty active career since I
started out from homo fourteen years ago.
Have been in county jails eleven times , slav
ing all the way from ten bays to six month's.
Hnvn served two short term In the peniten
tiary aud have seen the inside of a common
city "jug , " as you reporters call it , nineteen
times , 1 uont in the Ih'At ilmo when I was
not qulto Hfloon years old and the last time
nbout six months' ago , making n record of
thirty-two times that 1 have been arrested In
loss ihan llfluen years. "
"Do you fcol discouraged when thrown In
Jail I"
"That depends upon Ihoclrcumstances , An
ordinary nrrost and lockup simply as a suspi
cious character , or some such VhosUiul , Is
looked upon ns a moro incident of thu
trade , but a penitentiary sentence for
tlvojq ton voars or moro is a sorlous matter
with a'ny ono who Is nt all ambitious In his
profession. A Hie sentence or the dead drop
u man of my stripe Is not likely to got unless
lie gets into a ilnsporuto hole some lime and
Js obliged lo cui his way out. Uut llvo , toner
or II f teen years knocked out of a man's life is
n serious matter. You take n man now for
instance at my ago , with the most of life before -
fore himas wo used to say in our schoolboy
essays-and lot him bo lugged Into the poii
nnd hn\'o lo squander leu good ripe years
learning some stupid trade that ho won't '
have any use for afler ho nets out , is a very
ducournglne feature of the business. Some
young follows Just Blurting in Imagine , as I
used to , that the life of n professional gam
bler unit all-round thief is a picnic ; but I
tell you when you come to consider iho dis
couragements nnd risks mat a man has to
face , \ou will wnko up your mind that it is
about the hardest way on earth to make a
living. "
"You have no means of Insuring our life
or Insuring yourself against loss In this line
of business , have youj"
' ' .No , wo haven't. I'liora is u movement on
foot umong stiiio of the profession to organize
n gamblers' nnd pickpockets' mutual protec
tive association , which 1 think will bo u very
good scheme. Of course the whole business
will be sub-rosa , but it will bo
W - * " cotton up in llrst-class shape. You may
L wonder how wo can trust any Of our
juofe.sslon with tuo funds of the organization
but let me toll you that , laying aside ull
jokes , them Is such n tblnc ns honor among
thlovos. If ItUn't honor it Is something that
nets u peed deal like It , for I have known men
In my business who wonld not steal from u
poor innn or a pnrd under nnv lrcumsinnco.s.
! have known professional gamblers mid
v thieves who would divide the last nickel
with a poor woman or with anybody in the
nour of ueed. Hut I tell you , Jim , It always
nmkoi mo fool uncomfortable to meet such
mou in my line of business. They are good
nouch to bo making an honiiit living and
put u where they belong. A man lu IhU
business ought to bo consistent and if ho U
ho will bo n confounded vllllan from ono ont
of the week to the other. I have permittee
my sympathy to make n fool of mo some
times , A crook has no use for sympathy
All ho needs Is nerve , ability to play and c
llttlo cash. "
"Vou Imvd doubtless mot with some vorj
sensational experiences I"
"Yes , I have been shot in half n do/on
places , nnd have moro cuts nnd bruises aboul
my body than I am years old. Hut I don'l
llkoto toll about such things. They nlwn.v ;
remind mo that I ought lo have been an lion
usl man. Ttierc is ono llttlo Incident , though
Unit 1 will tell you about. It Illustrates the
ludicrous side of tlm business ,
A (111 111 I'llI , or OUCKXIIACKS.
"Five years ago this coming winter , ir
company with a pan ) , I decided to try my
Inch In" the pineries of Michigan. Wo ( enow
n ueultliy old lumber man up Ihoro who luu
snvornl hundred men at work in the woods ,
and he had an old-fnihionud way of going oui
to the camp every two weeks with a crip fill
of grcenb icks to pay olT the tntMi. Wo lalt
plans to intercept the old man's monov before
it rcncbml the camp. Ho usually went til
from the town where ho lived , about thirty
miles from the lumber camp , on Saturday ,
gi-tting off at n small station in the woods and
then driving about six miles to the camp. He
had a way of appearing very ciroless nbout
tlio handling of nn old woathor-boauin irrip
lhat bo Invariably carried , usually throwing
it under the seat In a very indifferent manner
when ho entered the car. His dross was
rough and ho iifl'octed the manner of some
one-horse farmer struggling to niako a living
on a forty-aero farm in the brush. AH this
was for a purpose , and that purpose waste
to conceal the fact that ho carried
u big bunch of bills in that old weather-
beaten grip. The old man had followed this
method of paying off his men with perfect so-
curlty for several years and had becun to
feel proud of wbat ho believed was n corn-
pi o to success at deceiving any robber who
might have , nt any time , been laying plans to
capture his mo nay.
The old man was mistaken. Wo shadowed
him for two weeks and then laid plans to ru-
llovo him of his conceit and his cash at the
sama tlmo.
About thrco miles from the station whcro
the old man got off there was a briili/o in the
road whcro ho bad to pass. At that point wo
decided to make the attack and sucuro the
cash ,
cashVo
\Vo know nbout the hour the old man
usually came along , and a few minutes be
fore ho arrived at the bridge wo pried two of
the boards off and loft the bridge in bad
shape.Vo then concealed ourselves In
n brush patch near thu road and waited
for the lumberman. Pretty soon
wo saw his sleigh coming through
the woods , winding around tno trees
that lined the crooked road. Tliero was u
man with him a Methodist preacher , whom
wo had seen before at the lumber camp but
wo did not permit that , to interfere with our
plans In Iho least. When the lumberman
came to the bridge ho saw the boards olTand
bo nnd the preacher got out to put them In
place. They tied the team about four rods
from the bridge and not moro than a rod from
whore wo lay. I made a dash for the grip
and my pard covered the two men with his
revolver , but ho did not intend to shoot. Ho
thought they would throw up their hands ,
but they weren't built that way. 'Iho old
man hauled out a wicked looking old horse
pistol , and seeing by this time that I hau the
grip and was putting off throuch the woods
my pard just 11 red once at random and then
look to his heels nnd followed me down
through the woods at about the llvlicst rate
of speed wo ever made In our llvos. Wo
didn't stop until wo reached the edge of a
lake about a mlle from the bridge. Hero
wo buckled on our skates nnd then before
making n dasn down the sldo of the lake wo
decided to throw the grin away and wo open
ed it to divide the money. I jerked the
old weather bcatm bat ; open and wo gazed in
bewilderment at its contents. "
"Full of greenbacks of course ? "
"Not by a long shot. Thai confounded old
grip contained nothing but n pocket bible ,
three hymn books , a nightshirt , two clean
handkerchiefs nnd a sermon written on forty
pages of letter paper , and on this texl , taken
from the twelfth chapter of Romans and the
seventeenth verse : "Provide things honest
in the sigbt of all men. "
"Whatlid you dot"
" Wnat did wo do I Well , you can imnslno
one thing wo did. Wo sworo. But wo had
to got out of there , and that right early. Wo
slid down the lake , caught a freight train and
rode down almost to Grand Uapids , and then
jumped and sneaked into town bo fore day
light. Tno papers gave the whole thinu
away next morning. They told nbout two
bungling highwaymen attempting to lob a
wealthy lumberman , nnd in the scramble
how they got hold of n minister's grip nnd
ran away with some testaments and tracts ,
while the grip containing 1,500 In preen-
bucks lay under the seat of the sleigh unmo
lested. The old preacher happened to have
a grip that was n dead match for the ono car
ried bv the lumberman , and I got the wrong
ono. I huvo always remembered that passage
of scripture , but I have violated it nearly
every day of my Jifo since. Now don't talk
to mo about reform , for I can't listen to it.
00 on homo to your wife nnd I will go my
way. I hope you will never toll any ono that
you hnvo mot mo , Jim , and U'y , if you can , to
forgot that them over was such a boy aud
min as I was and am. Goodbvo. "
And the crook and gambler attHO , gave tno
a hearty shako of the hand nnd walked away.
G.
A. Son Side Fancy.
Jaclt Kemlrlck IlJiig ) Indaw's \ \ rcklu.
1 would , O Sea. thy destinies were minn
To Miapo- for one short day. I'd give to
"theo
The rest which I am sure thou'ldst not do-
clino.
If thou to have thy way were wholly
free.
This ondlcsc boating on the sandy shore ,
This constant undulation on the deep ,
This novcr-coasini ; din of thy dull roar ,
Do testify the vigil thou dost , keep.
MctMnks if thou eouldst in quiescence lie
For one full day 'twero bettor for man-
klnd-
For them that awell the sounding coast hard
by.
For them that homes unfathomcd find.
Ana so I'd say , had I the sovereign power ,
Were all that is subject to my will
For but ono day , one minute , or ono hour ,
"Whilst I am reigning , boa , do thou bo
still. "
.11IOVT WOMKlt.
Kate Field , who has made Washington her
homo for Iho lust eighteen months , calls both
Now York City nnd Uoston "Idiotically An-
glomnniiical. "
Miss NatiQtto McDowell , granddaughter of
llenrv Ulay , lives with her fatlicr In the
old Clay homestead of Ashland , ono of the
most beautiful and romantio places in nil
Kentucky.
The Maine girls are no cowasds. Dawn in
Washington county the girl raspberry pick
ers run across a boar now and then , but keep
right on picking berries.
New Vork World : luich year of Chief
Justice Fuller's residence in Washington has
witnessed the debut of ona of his seven
charming daughters. This year Miss Mary
Fuller returns fiom her long slay in Derlln
to enter society at the capital.
Mrs. Douglas , wife of the once famous
physician who attended General Grant on
his deathbed , has just received tin appoint
ment to n subordinate position in thu treas
ury department ut Washington. Her hus
band , by his unremitting attention to the
dying president , lost his practice nnd has
never regained it. Ho is now broken In
health ami almost penniless ,
Walter Ilosunt says that a clever English
girl of bis acquaintance was employed some
time ago by u man who brings out cheap
norclotlos , She got DO shillings fur writing a
story of HO.OOO words ; that ls to say , u penny
for uvory lifty words. And she was not
allowed to put her name to tno thingbecause ,
as her sweater toM her , "If you put your
name the people will ask for you and your
priro will go up. "
All Franco is very much Interested Just
now In the future of a young widow , the
I > rlnco s Lotllta , who 1s the onlv marriagea
ble princess of the Donaparto family. The
princess is a woman of somewhat imposing
beauty. She has a rather largo ilguro , in
clined to embonpoint , a florid fnco , nnd thick
black hair , Her lips are full , almost to the
point of sensuality. Of her shoulder * and
arms It has been said that they might fur
nish models for a sculptor , for they are
superbly developed. In manner the prlncoii
is most vivacious , but she bus an unpleasant
way of making cutting aud sarcastic re
marks. She has expressed a desire to marry
ngalu. and Paris Is curious to know whom
iho will select for. * Dusbaua.
Wonderful Prograw of tha War Again si
Liquor , Tobicoo and Opium.
BI-CMLORIDE OF GOLD'S ' WORK AT BLAIR ,
SUCUCNH of tlio Nobrnska Branch of
Hecloy'H Famous Dwlglit Institu
tion Fully AucHtcd lly Its
Satisfactory IUmiHs.
"ICoeloylsm" Is just now the fashion. The
man who has not heard of bl-chlortdo of gold
and who cannot cite from among his ac
quaintances cases who are "remarkable
cures" is not "in It , " colloquially speaking.
Not very long ago It was a dlHlcult matter
to find out nnvthlng about Dr. ICeoloy's euro
for the alcohol , opium and tobacco habits.
But slnco such great journals as the Chicago
Tribune , Now York Sun , and , latlorly , TUB
BEE ( to say nothing of hundroJs of papers of
lesser Influence ) , have freely thrown their
columns open to the testimony of the res
cued , nnd. moreover , through humnnltarian ,
not advertising Inlliioncoi , there is no excuse -
cuso for anyone not knowing thatdruukan-
ncss can bo cured.
In a recent Sunday issue of Tiir. IlRi' I
wrote of Dr. Kooloy's institute nt Dwlght ,
III. , and of ttio euros that wuro being effected
there through tha Instrumentality of hi-
chlorldo of gold. It will bo good now.4 to
many readers of Till' DISK to know that there
Is now in Nobraikia branch of UiuJCjaloy
Institute where bl-chlorido of irold is trans
forming drundlcards and opium habitues into
sober aud useful men. Till3 branch is lo
cated in the beautiful llttlo city of Uluir ,
whcro Dr. ICcnloy's ' methods and medicines
nro working wonders.
\ visited the nialr Institute recently for the
purpose of bocomiiu : acquainted with mom-
ben of the brotliorhoDd to which I am proud
to belong the brotherhood of men
who have thu manhood to
make the effort to thro-v off the fetters of
a destroying habll , and Ihit I might bo nblo
to intelligently tell the people of the loophole
so near homo for the unfortunates who arj
under the alcoholic ban.
The choice of niair for tbo branch Institute
In Nebraska has proven u happy ono. It is
easy of access , quiet onouuh for the neces
sary rest , yet lively onouuh to keep tntcrosl
ultvo , hospitable , picturesque and has cool
and leafy streets.
The people of Blair have personally taken
a great Interest In the instltuto nnd its pa
tients , and many doors nro thrown open to
the men In the endeavor to cheo- and oncotir-
uge. Not long since Mr. Crowell , who owns
onn of the most beautiful estates in Nebraska ,
invited the patients out to his place , which is
situated near Blair , nnd entertained them
gr.ictitully. This spirit , which treats thu
men not as outcasts , but as unfortunates , is
not only right , but very helpful.
On May 10 last the instilutu was opened
with Dr. B. F. Monroe us physician in charge
and Mr.V. . J. Cook , the business manager ,
to look after the temporal wants of the pa
tients. It was not long before Its existence
became in a measure known and patients
benan to arrive.
The people of the west hnvo not yet heard
as much ubjut the ICeeley cure as these of
Iho east , or the Institute would have been
crowded from the time of its opening. The
news is gradually llltoring its way into all
corners , u man bavinir been cured is not
slow to announce the fact in his lit
tle world , and so the news spreads.
The instltuto at Dwight started in a much
smaller way and as the news traveled east
ward and the truth and value of the romoay
became known the newspapers took the mat'
tor up nnd distributed the Information broad
cast. People who had boon compelled to
stand idly by and see alcohol destroy thou
sands of otherwise useful nnd brilliant men
were aroused and realizing that here , for the
first time , was an infallible remedy for tbo
world's greatest cause and deadliest and
mosi prevalent disease began toscnd patienls
lo Dr. ICooloy. And so , no doubt , will it be
with Blair. When people lealizo that the
drunken father , son , brother or husband can
bo relieved of his malady , that ho can return
to them sound in body nnd mind , that tbo
broken nnd unhappy homo can bo
roslorod then bl-chlorldo of cold
as administered by Dr. Monroe at
Blair will do as much for Nebraska as it has
done for the homes of the oast. Skepticism
will , no doubt , deter many from reaping this
bonorlt for some time , but I contidently pre
dict that the time is not rar distant when In
formation nbout the bl-chlorldo of gold reme
dies and their Uses will bo as familiar to people
ple generally as the homo remedies of our
grandmothers.
It may bo well to digress slinhtly and say
that It Is now the generally accepted opinion
that drunkenness is a discaso nnd not n vice ,
prohibitionists to tbo contrary notwithstand
ing. For centuries alcohol has had Its unre
lenting grip at the throats of high and low ,
and ho who could shake It olT after it once
became fastened was a remarkably stronc
man. Jonncr , Pasteur , Koch and hosts of
scientific men have discovered remedies and
alleviators for Iho various Ills that , human
ilosh Is heir to , but it win loft for Dr. Leslie
E. ICoeloy lo discover a certain and painless
cure for the greatest of all curses , drunken
ness. This remedy Is the double chloride of
gold and by Its use alcohol , opium , morphine ,
cocaine , chloral , cigaiottcs and all similar
poisons , which , for sama unaccountable
reason , are spread temptingly as traps for
poor , weak humanity to fall Into , mo utterly
routed and put lo Illcht forever. Dr. ICeoloy's
great success with bi-chlorido of Kold is duo
lo thu firet that ho can administer such
largo quantities of Iho paid as are necessary
to drive out the poisons , his preparation car
rying with it an uliimnunl to rolluvo the sys
tem of thu gold after it has done its ' work.
The success of the remedy cnnnot now bo
doubted , even by thu moU skeptical , more
than nine thousand men hiving been cuied
by it , with no failures , and only tivu pur cent
of relapses to thu habit which bad been
cured.
As yet the great organizations of this coun
try , whether lomperanco , religious or benovo-
ionl , have made no ofllclal movement to up-
ply the bl-chlorido of gotd remedy to the bet
terment of humanity , but thu dav will coma
when skepticism will bo brushed away and
drunkenness reduced to a minimum , The
| ) rohlbltlou party , whoso putative ohjcot is
the alleviation , by law , of the misery caused
by drunkenness , has done nothing to invest- !
gate the merits of bl-chlorldo of gold as a
neans to ihu end Ihuy wish to attain.
Tno Chicago Kvuning Journal , ono of tbo
paper * which has iRtoly Ihrown off projudlcu
md Is advocating Keoloyisni , sava cdilorml-
y : "Apropos of nothing why is U that Iho
irohlbitionlsts take so little Interest in the
Ceoloy cure for the liquor hablU , It either
cures that habit or It docs not.
f it does it attaint ) just the end
thu prohibltionisls are seeking , and they
should laud Us inventor us thu greatest of
non. They nro not lauding to any particular
extent. Is it possible that the prolossional
irohlbitlonlst fears to see his occupation
; onot"
At the Blair instltuto patients nro recolvod
and cared for precisely ns at Dwlght. They
ire taken ton quiet , comfortable boarding
louse , and are soon taken in hand by follow
students" and made to fool that they are
imong friends. The enthusiasm among the
nen Is Intense. They see the change that U
vorktng in each other's mind and body and
cheerily coiigratulalo ono another , while they
encourage and help thu newcomer who haslet
lot recovered from his weakness and nervous *
ness. It is u lesson to humanity ut largo to
uo the amount of unsoliishncm and hearty
linduois displayed toward ono another by
erstwhile weak aud nervous wrecks.
There are over thirty pnlleuis now at Blair
and Ihlrty-tlva cures have been otTected ,
Abou a dozen Omaha men have been and are
now undergoing iroatmenl Ihoro , and they
are representative men lu every reapact.
Dr. Monroe has made somn marvelous
euro * In tbo short time the liutltuto has been
open. He has completely cured the worst
trunkara in U'onorn Iowa , a man who \tas
amod from Sioux City to the south for his
errible debauches. 1 talked with this man
on the day of his graduation , and I neveruinl
a more lulelllgont , sober and gentlemanly
nan or ono so thoroughly happy In his rotor-
nation. The doctor is making a succaia ful
uura of a man who consumed thirty grains
of cocaine , thirty crulns of morphine aud two
[ UarU of whisky dully.
This man I also talked with and ho is as
ooulidoutftj the doctor thai ho U boluir cured ,
ho Is a physician ntIs thoroughly cogntr.an
of his position. It Is , not necessary , how
ovor. to elaborate onlno cures being mado.
A brnuch of the B-phlorldo of Gold club
has been organized aUUlalr , and Its meetings
nro being onthusUUIciUly attended , The
young ladies of Blalft.Vrith the tender pity o
woman-kind , have famished and care for a
comfortable club room for the boys. Frost
bouquets of flowers lire1 placed on the tables
every morning nnd llilfituros , books , nmga
lines and musical Insirqmohts Ho In picturesque
quo confusion on thJ writing and card tables
In the comfortable room. Almost dally I ntn
asked ns to the expense of the ICoeloy treat
ment. The charge fot'tbo ' treatment Is * J5 a
week , comfortable board can bo had fcr &i or
M n wook. miscellaneous expenses , such as
baths , shaving , cigars } etc. , $1 to tJ per
week , surely n moderate expense In proportion
tion to the benollt.
i-'or the btmollt 01 Nebraska nnd adjacent
territory the branco of the ICooloy Institute
nt Blair has been started. It is easier of ac
cess than Dwlght , patients from any pirt ot
the state having good railroad facilities bv
either of Omaha or l-'romont. nnd the mini
mum of hours spent in travel Is very desir
able to all new patients. Another great
desideratum U the saving in railroad
fares as between Blilr nnd Dwlght.
To Ornahn It Is especially convenient ,
enabling friends of patients to visit them
frequently and Keep Informed ns lo their
progress. The number of Omaha men now
ut the Blair Instltuto undergoing treatment
toni 1103 the appreciation In which the rem
edy is boclnnlug to bo held horo. The case
of an Om.ilm man sent to Blair lost week is
being anxiouilv watched by a largo number
of people , and his cure will result in n num
ber of other men goiuir. A letter from him ,
lois than a week after his airival , states that
ho hud given up whisky nnd was certain of a
euro. This coed news come in the fnco of
thu belief that ho was a hopeless nnd incur
able drunkard , bereft of health , moral con
trol , nnd nil hut n few faithful friends , whoso
faith will bo rewarded when he returns a
new man , mentally and physically , with Ins
appetite for liquor gone forever.
Dr. Monroe , thu physician in charge , is
Ihoroughlv coinpelont , having received his
tr.ilnlng In tbo treatment of alcohol and
opium habits at tno bands of Dr. ICocley him
self , which is all that l necessary to siy of
competency. Ho has practised for twelve
yearj In Blalrand has boon remarkably suc
cessful in his prictico. Ho Is an ideal man
for the place , Broad minded , n splendid dis
ciplinarian , iontlo and sympathetic , he can
bo confidently entrusud with cases to whom
the bl-chtnrido of gold is necessary.
iOil 1ST IttUIIAIlIMOX.
Thu Jonrnuy.
. / . / { . /'older.
' 'Fair child , whore art thou going ? "
I asked a brlsht-oycd boy ,
Whoso golden locks wore glowing
As ho bounded on in joy.
His cheeks were flushed and ruddy ,
In ltu < morning air so cool ,
Ho replied , " 1 o to hludy , "
And he pointed to the school.
"Young man , xvhero art lliou going ,
With brigntlv polished gun
And glittering sabro glowing
In the rays of the noonday sun ? "
"O , I ihought tolivo in story ,
As my country's strongest shield ,
And I eo to seek for irlorv
On the bloody battloilold. "
4
"Old man , where art thou uolng-
Wlmt croat journey hast begun
As thy silvery locks are glowing
In the rays of tho-setting suuj"
Ho raised bis heall ) lo heavy ,
Toward heaven's brilliant domo.
And his eyes scented lit with glory
As ho said , "I'm going homoi"
s.i rixo OF ii'truur nvi > x.
An Inqiiiriii ; Mind.
Philadelphia Prjss ! ' "Mamma , who is
Tunkanleli" , ,
"I'm sure I don't , know , child. I never
heard of such n person. " "
"Does ho love papal ! . '
"I don't know. " i >
"Doos teacher lovo- him ! "
" " ' ' '
"Love who )
"Tunkantol. "
"Whatever are " veil Hulking about , ray
child ! " ' *
' Well , I don't care. Anyway , I saw papa
huggin' teacher on the stairs yesterday , an" "
toachnr say she love papa bettor than Tun-
kantcl. "
Too Old.
Philadelphia Times : "Ma , " said the smart
10-voar-old boy , at the dinner table , as ho
picked up au ear o ; corn , "I don't want this
corn. "
"U'hy nol , my son ? "
"Because li Is lee old. "
"You are mistaken , my son. It is a very
nice and tender car. "
"Sure "
"Yoi. What made you think it was old ? "
"Oh. because it has whiskers on it , " he re
plied , while pulling olT some ot the silk me
cook had left on carelessly.
A I'nir.
Epoch : Timmy Your papa goes out every
night and comes homo drunk.
Jimmy So does yours.
Timmy Who told you !
Jimmy My papa Who told you nbout
tnlnul *
Timmy My papa. Uomo on and lot's play
marbles.
Quite a Marks in an.
Kate Field's Washington : Anxious parent
Jo Johnnie doesn't got on well with his
studies ? I nm afraid vou Hud him rather nn
aimless boy.
Teacher Aimless ! ! You ought to have
soon him hit mo on thoTioso with an mitpot
from the far corner of the school-room yes-
lord ay ,
Kdille'B Kx.ilnnntion.
U. 11. Miiotnlcu
"Yes , the earth Is moving alwavs ,
Nisht nnd day , aud day and night ; "
Said our Eddie to his playmato.
"And It Is MO moro than right
That It should be , for if ti happened
To cease moving , suddenly ,
It would fly llko space through lightning
And bo dashed lo plocoi. Soul"
.No Wonder I hey Qnurrnloil.
"You and Charlie quarreled. I hoar1' !
"Yos. "
"What about ? "
"Ho sild ho only wanted ono verv llttlo
kiss when I had half a dozen largo o'nos all
ready for him. "
A MnHyr to Duty.
Mothnr ( suspiciously ) If you haven't
bc-en in swimming bow did your hair cot o
wet ?
Little DIcK-That's perjplratlon ruiinln1
away from bad boys who wanted mo to dls-
ob-jy you air go In swlmmln' !
Not to Hu ltflto | > ) t rt tti Un ip | Kko. .
"Papi , Is my UnclOSko a gooJ farmer ? "
"No , Dickoy. Ho leaves his agricultural
Implement * ! out in thovxvpather nnd they irot
allrusiod. " , J. , '
( After a prolongudu > < menial struggle )
"Papa. U that the WAV ho got his tooth all
rusted ? " i ,
Tim AinliiDlo .
Munsoy's Weekly : ' Young Sappy Do vou
thiiiic Miss Amy will Bb e down soon I '
Eftie I'm sura I hp o B0 , for really I flnd
you an awfully hard jiun to entertain.
ll < > utiiiK ijflj Iiriiin ,
Harper's IJaiar : tlP pa" said Wllllo , as
the bass drum wont by. "that man ain't us
strong as DO looks , Is ( LOT'
"I don't know. Why ? "
-Ho doesn't seem to-bo able to break the
box open. " -
Thut
Teacher asks n bright bovi "How nun v
ounce * are there to tbo pound ! "
Bright Boy That depends upon the grocer.
Tlio H iJhr liny In Hum in or.
When the cherries on the branches nron fryIng -
Ing , '
And the sentries nrq n plodding In the dirt ,
And the sun our httiimn Hush Is mortifying
O. 'tis inoti tbu pallant soldier sweats his
shirt ,
While be tramps In * , ho battalion for the la
dles ,
The thermomeior 800 in the sun ,
If you want to bo prepared to freeze In hades ,
This kind of preparation yanks iho bun.
CIIOHD4.
If you want to bo prouarcd to freeze in hades
-freeze in hades ,
This kind of preparation yanks the bun.
To Avoid Kuiiunur Ailments.
Drink SoVerlaa Ginger Ale Excttlslor
Springs Co. ' * .
SOME ANONYMOUS HUMORISTS ,
Their Work is Shown in the City's ' Signs and
Placards.
SINGULAR AND STRIKING SENTENCES.
Sntnplcft of Original Orthojjrnn'iy ' no
Store Signs , TomlistoncH mill
Flaunting Itniincm-Arguments
lor Compulsory Kditcntlon.
To the superficial and unobservant stroller ,
there is nothing to nrrest one's nttontlon in
the partly vncaut lot nt the oornor of SK-
teontli ntid Dodge streets , dotlgnntod In the
onglnoer'3 plat of the city ns blocic 80. The
uvorago sauntoror can see nothing but an
ordltmry city lot overrun with a luxuriant
growth of rank , noUomo woods , and in the
back ground loom up In blank dro.irlntm the
tlrao-worn walls of n few old ratmhucklo
buildings , roll03 of former days , whoso usefulness -
fulness Is so far departed as to bo passed by
In contempt even by the ubiquitous bill poster.
Tlioy stand there In the he.irt of the busy ,
BuatliiiR city In nil thulr deserted gloominess ,
the broken cosumonts hang rotting upon ttio
crn mhllm ; walls , nml the doow swing creak
ing on the rusty hinges. Monuments of the
pist , they scorn to gaze with jonloiisy
on the nmutilllcont pilot roaring
their graceful fronts around them , and to
brood ever the city , weighed down In sorrow
for their departed groatnuss. Hut "vonlt
summi ules otluoluctubilo torapin,11 yet a llt-
tlo whtlo and tliU unsightly dilator of houses ,
so longnn oyo-soro to the fastidious passer by ,
will bo swept away , and Undo Sam will
rear instead n splendid new postolllco , which
bids fair to bo tli architectural gem of the
city. In anticipation of this event and with
a facotitms , hceminp solicitude for the piop-
orty of our Undo , some of the wags in the
neighborhood have erected a largn sign bear-
In ; ; the legend :
"S.icrod to the Memory of Undo Sam ;
Kopp Oft thn Grass. "
Cutting a large swath in the high weeds
that faugo Sixteenth street , and raising a
mound , grave-like in appearance , they huvo
planted the sign above It. The reporter was
nttrauted by the humor and originality ol
the thing , and stood around to see
what effect it would produce on these
hurrying by. Several stately and dlgnitlcd
matrons , who worn engaeod in that most in-
alicnnblo of woman's rights -that fnvorito
employment of the son which la eouernlly
termed shopping , happened by , leisurely en
gaged in discussing "chnllis at I2o per yard ,
and the decadence of cambric frllllnir. " One
of them caught sight of the sign and tried to
attract her compmlon's attention.but In vain.
Ignoring her cniirelv.tho.v kept their tongues
awagsjinc about the only thing that seems re-
allv wholly to occupy their dear little minds
and hearts dress.
One grieved to see their utter inability to
catch the cxdtiisito humor of the thing , and
was sufilcicntly uncharitable to believe the
most sarcastic things that have boon said
about the uttqr obtusonojs of feminine na
tures to anything humorous. Who could refrain -
frain from thinking tnnt If these women were
cast on a barren island together tnoy would
ahcuss n now fashion in tig leaves every day.
Probably 200 persons passed by within an
hour.
Two well kept , urbane old gentlemen , ro-
tiroil merchants , out for tnoir constitutional
sauntered by leisurely. No sooner did the
youncor catch sight of the sign than his face
wnnnlod. and ho broke out Into a loud laugh ,
which somewhat startled his more staid com-
oanion. Ho pointed to the sign , and his
friend road aloud , dwelling emphatically nu
each word , then turning with an injured
look , inquired :
l\Frt1l TnVi.l l.rhncnlfl tlin 1nt.-nl
John started in to explain , and as they
crossed Capitol avenue tnoy were heard
arcuing it out.
That sign has boon a cause of much merri
ment to mnnv of the observant .siiuntcrurs
along Sixteenth street , during the past week
and if the wags who placed it there have no
other recompense they may rest assured thai
they have caused much innocent enjoyment.
On Thirteenth street nsar Chicago , is a
aundry run bv a moon-eyed son of the
"Piowory Kingdom. " In the window is a
sign In almost undiscipherablohieroglyphics :
"Fall not in spite of much complaint
To give Ah Sin his dues ;
His people live in mild restraint
And mind their p's jnd queuos. "
A foilco in front of a tombstone shop on
Howard street has a grotesque sign which
reads thus :
"Closing out at greatlv reduced
irlcos. Call early and secure a bargain. "
Artomus \ \ ard would turn green with envjn
could ho sco some of the original orthocraphy
on signs which Haunt thu breozu In the Bo-
icmlan dbtrict.
"Planters Supplys , " ' Bred Solo Her , "
'Mills for Sal , " and Hundreds of others
equally as phonetic and ludricrous preel vou
where ere you go. One of the best things
seen is in the neighborhood of Thirty-fourth
and OnminK "treols. In a deep pond is a
lester which roads :
' Hlank BroUiers are Letting Down Prices. "
night under this some careful peison.de-
trous to warn bovs of danger , lias unwit-
Injrly posted a strip of board and crudely
> aintcd tbcioon :
"No Hotloni. "
In front of a Douglas street fruit stand is
a sign which runs :
' Puirs Tc unloco , It for Me. "
The oivnor , a swarthy sou of sunny Italv ,
frow pugnacious and threatened to "usn a
inlfa ona ( lamina reporta , " when quostlonod
about the import of the sign.
A Harnoy street dyer thus proclaims his
mslnoss :
" 1 live to ilvo , I dye to llvo. "
On a neat little cottage on St. Mary's avo-
luo is this :
' This house for sale as soon ns you can
raise wind enough to move Uer. "
Nowhere do the foibles and occontridtios
f poor humanity appear nioro than In the
pilaphs quaint and curious found in the
ast renting places.
A philosopher or humorist turned loose in
nu old grave yard would llnd moro food for
peculation than in the crowded thorough-
arcs of n great city.
Uoth in the marble that affection or re-
nor.so rears over silent sleepers , and in the
ii-.criptlons upon htnnblo headstones , telling
f the virtues of the deceased or preaching
roni hllent lips sermons to the living , Is
here the same oat hello appeal against on-
ivlon as though the sleepers in their graves
till clung to thulr human kinship ; still
1 mined attention fiom the busy , bustling
vorld above.
.Many epitaphs , quaint and curious , are
ound'in the coineunle ? around Omaim.
ilany are intended to bo serious. One of the
non unique anil and original opltnpi is In a
onogravoon the road Just boyo'nd Fort
Omaha. It is suppoiod to bo the resting
ilaco of a desperado. It Is an IOIMO as it is
imbiguouH. On a plain board U pal ntcd
ho words ' 'liono Homo , " and n crude hand
vltli index finger extended points towards a
localitv in which the great bontiro is popu-
arly supposed to bo crackling , thus :
tiono HOUJO
Out In Laurel Hill , down in a little shaded
doll , Is a time-stained headstone so overrun
with ivy that is vary dlllicull to decipher iho
opitunh. It is thu 'tomb of n certain Loin
Aries , a sculptor and a shrewd business
man who believed In advertising. This is
what , ho cut :
"Hero lies the body of Lorn Aries' ' wife.
Ho is a inarblo cutter. This htone was
urojtod by him ns a sample of his wont and a
trlbutn to her memory. You can order mon
uments nttho sumo style for ! > ' ) $ "
In a country burvinir ground , n few inllos
from South Omaha , is a slouu which thus
factitiously and sententlously tells thu story
of u brewer :
"Poor Jockov Hoth lies burled hnro ,
Tlio1 once ho had Doth halo and stout ;
Death stretched him on his nltlor blur ,
And in another world ho hopi about , "
Holy Sepulchre cemetery has n tomb with
thu Inscription :
"Our life is uut a winter's day ,
Somebreaxfast and away ;
Others to dinner stav and are well fed ,
The oldest man sups and KOOS to bed ;
l.nrgo Is his debt Who linger * out thu day
Who goes thn soonott bos the least to pay. "
Mcar bv an affectionate , but unpootlo
parent , elves his oborub sou's memory this :
"A short-llvod Joy
Was my little boy ;
He's gone on blyti ,
So don't you cry. "
South 27th Street and St. Mary's Avenue , Omaha.
Among the leading educational Institute * of thu city in y be placed St. Iterclnnnn' * Acad
emy , stltuatod nt the terminus of St. Mnry's nrcnuo and S7th ulrcot. The Lndliv * of the Snored
Heart , under whoso direction It N placed , omit no otrort u > mtvnnco thu mi'iitnl and moral do
volopnipntof tholr pupils , and In thli n-ipect luivp git en eeni < rat sMlifnutlott to both parent !
and children. The course of studios ndnpled lnolildoso\ory br.innh from an eloinontary rdu-
cnllon ion ( Inlthcd clntslonl culluro. Latin Is t inuht In all the higher oliitH < .H , while I'rptich
or Gorman form n part of the ordinary eouisc , no ordlng to Iho wish of the parent * . Muslo
Valntlng and drawIne are nKo tiiUKhU The Academy U divided Into four departments , the
mis of which are as follows )
Senior Glosses. . . . $8O.OO per yonr
Intormcdlnto Classes 0O.OO par yenr
Junior Classes 4O.OO per year
Preparatory Classes 2O.OO per year
DlfToronooB In religion form no obstacle to the reception of uuplls , proTlded they conform
o the uxtorlor regulation of iho school.
The Scholastic Year Commences the First Tuesday In September.
Classes begin nt 0 n. in. , and the pupil * lire dlsmlssi-d at 3i'K\ \ ,
It Is the tnrjost , flnost , host patronbiMl , nnd our rates are the lowoit nt any school In tlio
west. A thorough course of study and practical teachers. Short Hand , Actual Muslims * .
Hanking and I'citnmnshlp. xpoulalllcs. Our graduates never fall , mid nro all In good paylnft
positions. Hoard furnished for work , or nl it , 73 to $ ! . Bond for cn
Address
, Ewiiig & Company ,
Cor. Capitol Avenue and Kith Street , Ointihn. Nob.
Having decided to clone out our Saddle nnd Harness business ,
wo olTor our onliro stock of
HARNESS , SADDLES , WHIPS , NETS , X&OBES
Saddlory , Hardware , otc. , at not post. To those in nuod of goods in this line , an
opportunity is now ntToraod to souuro llrst-cluss hand made goods at lo\vost possi
ble prices.
WELTY & GUY , - 1316 FARNAM STREET.
NO GTJR.EX ! NO PAY.
1316 Douglas Street , Omaha , Neb.
.
10 u lu. to 12 m. Send atnuip for reply
CHICHESTEH'S Et/OUCH. RED CROSS niAMOND BRAND
THE ORIGINAL AMD GCNUIMC. The oolr Hnfi. Pure. nIrt/jM ( / rill for .l
Lnillon. uk Prugtli ! for Cktchnttri Knplitft lltamon t Jlrand lu Krtl anil Gold litrullle
bow dcnlM with blue rlbtou 1 c.Lo no otlirr Lliul. Ktfiue AwbiHtMhon * and J ,
All | illl In fititcboaril I OKI , ; Ink vruppf r * . am dangcroti1 * ri'tinterfi tin. It Druffglili. cr i n4
4 * . In ptnmtn for pirllouhrs , imitlmouU und "Itrlle Inr lu < lln , " inlrtter , hj rrllirn Mull.
JO.OOO TVillmonUi. Ajm < faptr. CHICHCSTCn CHEMICAL Co , , MndUnn Nqimre.
bold br .ill Local Ururclnl * . I'lIlI.AMtLl'UlA. PA.
rrHE
OF OMAHA.
ABSOLUTELY INCANDESCENT
FIRE PROOF. ELECTRIC LIGHTS
PERFECT
HOT A DARK
VENTILATION
OFFICE
IR THE BUILDING ,
NIGHT AND DAY
ELEVATOR
68 VAULTS , SERVICE
DIRECTORY OF OCCUPANTS :
GROUND FLOOR :
M.U NAl'GLE COMPANY , Tpjegrnph 1'olci ,
Ore s Tip * , r/umlcr , ole. OMAHA REAL KSTATK AND TRUST 00.
MUIU fc OAYLOUD. Iteul Kstuto. J. 1) ANTiS. : KotiiMlu CIKur Stand.
CITY COMl'TROLLEK. WOME.V8 nXOHANOi : .
FIRST FLOOR :
TI1K OMAHA COUNTING ROOM. AdKRANOL | RHKVrH & CO. , Conlrnctors.
M'l tlsluc nml Hiiliscrlijtlmi Dopar tniDiils. WKSTHRN UNION Tni.nORAPH Ol'KlOK.
AMI.UIOAN WATHU WORKS COMPANY. CKNTRAL LOAN AND TRUST CO.
supiiusTiNDr.NT : IHIJ IIUILDINO.
SECOND FLOOR.
TIIH PATItlOIC LAND COMPANY. Owners TIIR KQUIlAIILr. LIKK ASSURANCE SO
of Dundee PIuco. CIETY OK NEW YORK.
DR. II. II. IIIRNCY , No o and Tlirout. M. A. UPTON TO. . Itujil Kslutc.
nit. oiiAiuj : ROSP.WATII . CHRISTIAN SCIKNCi : ASSOCIATION.
SAVINOt. . LIKn. of Now Yorlf ANGLO-AMr.RK'AN MORTGAGE & TRUST
MUTUAL 1,1VK INSJR- COMPANY.
ANUI3 COMPANY. IIEE I1UREAU OK CLAIMS.
THIRD FLOOR.
JOHN GRANT. roiitr-tclorforMroetiitidSldo- MANHATTAN MIE INSURANCE COM
walk PiiNUint'iils , PANY.
ROIinHTW. PATIUOK , I.awOniuos. DR. W. .1. GALI1RAITII.
KQUII'Y I'OI'RT NO. I. Dlt 0-iUAR S. IIOKKMAN.
r.gi'iTY ' 'ot'itr No. a. UNITED STATES LIKE INSURANCE CO. .
LAW COURT NO. 4. of .Now York.
J. M. ( MiAMURKS , Ab r.icti. R. W. MMERAL.
W.M. bl.MKRAU S. It. PA'ITEN , Donllst.
FOURTH FLOOR.
NORTH WESTERN MIITUAI , LI IT , IXSUIt- K. M. ELLIS. Architect.
ANCECOMPANY GEORGE W. SUIW & COMPANY , flollollom of
Pati'iils.
CONNECTICUT MUTUAL LIKE 1NSUR- II.A.WAONEU.Agont for UnllodRltUcsMiitual
ANCE COMPANY. Aouldmit Insiir.inoo Company.
PE.NN MUTUAL LIKE INSURANCE COM JOHN LETHEM. Pnlillhliur.
PANY. OMAHA COAL EXCHANGE.
HARTrORDLll'E AND ANNUITY IN&UK- P. KKEN11ERG , Trosco Piilntur.
ANl'E COMPANY. ALEX MOORE , UnI Emits mill Loins.
MEAD INVESTMENT COMPANY. IIOHN SASH AM ) DOOR CO.
WEHhTER .V HOWARD. Insur.im'o. THE MERCHANTS RETAIL COMMERCIAL
EDISON GENERAL ELECTRIC COMPANY. AGENCY.
WESTERN fAR SERVICE ASSOCIATION. GAY IUUK .t CO. . of Now York , K. A. Ovor-
ANDREW ROrtE ATER , Civil Eiuliiuur. llolcl , Munusbi.
Civil , STAPLETO.N LAND CO.
J. L. 1ILACK , Engineer
FIFTH FLOOR.
lirAntJUAJlTim II. H. ARMY. DEPART OIIIIU' PAYMASTER.
MENT Ol % THE PLATTE.IKOtllWi. PAYMASTER.
DEPARTMENT COMMANDER ASSlbTAN I' QUARTERMASTER.
AlUl'TANT GENERAL INSPECTOR tIMALL ARMS PRAOTlOIi
INSPECTOR GENERAL OH IEK OK ORDNANCE.
JUDGE ADVOCATE.
ENGINEER OKKIOER.
CIMEl' QUARTERMASTER.
C.iIEl1 COMMIT VRY 01' SUIISISTENOE. AlDEf-DE-OAMP.
MEDICAL DIRECTOR. ASalVI'ANT HU RGEON.
SIXTH FLOOR.
HARTMAN * COLLINS. Cast Iron Ga mill UNITED TATES LOAN fc INVESTMENT
WiiUT Pipe. THE IMPLEMENT DEALKR.
G. LAMIIERT SMITH. II , V. KITOII. SluuojraiJliur.
C. I' . UE1NDOR1T , Arnliltoct. L.O. NAHII. I.OIMH.
ARTHUR JOHNSON , & URO. . ContMUlois. W. A GOULD , VATM * .
HAMILTON LOAN AND TRUST OO.
PRINTING CO.
REED KIMTUKUL ROOilS Of THE 1IEB , Ooiupoc
U. S. ARMY PRINTING Olfl'IOKS. IIIR , SiuriioVyiiins aT.d
SEVENTH FLOOR.
THE OMAHA PRErfS CLUU. , 1I\RI1ER hllOP.
SOCIETY 01' faTATIONARV ENGINEERS. I
A few more elegant office rooms may be had by applying
to R. W. Baker , Superintendent , office on counting room floor
