Nebraska Newspapers

    10 THE CXMAJIA DAILY BEE SUNDAY , SEPTEMBER , 28 , 1890-SIXTEEN" PAGES-
You Can Save People's lammoth Installment House
< ed through the help
be convinced General Credit in the beautiful S <
Largest fioilse lest.
orcatcvane \ . daparlmcnt
613-615-617-619 N. 16tli St. , Bet. California and Webster.
Forging right ahead ! Never did such a business in September aswe are doing this year. But Wre working for it , We sell goods cheaper than
other merchants , and that's the reason people come to us. Last week was one of the best of the season , We make our attractions doubly strong to
m make this \veek better. Look at this GRAND. SET OUT. It's a card that speaks for itself , and speaks well , We match these bargains against
any that we've ' ever offered in this community.
BED-ROOM SUITS , i6th Century , Oak or Walnut , BRUSSELS CARPETS , in all the Latest Fall Patterns ,
OUR TERMS. . $9,50 , $14 , $22 , $3O. 48c , 65c , 75c , 9Oc.
FOLDING BEDS , i6th Century , Oak or Cherry , INGRAIN CARPETS , One Hundred and Fifty Patterns ,
$15 $1 worth pep week of goods or $4 , per rnon th. $9.5O. $14 , $22,5O , $27,5O. I8j c , 27c , 38c , 5Oc. WRITE FOR OUR
$30 worth of goods , PARLOR SUITS , Plush and Tapestry Coverings , LACE CURTAINS AND WINDOW SHADES ,
$00 $1.BO worth per of goods week , or $0 per mo. $22.5O , $29 , $35. $45 , 35c , 60c , $1.15 , $1,90. 128-pngo lllustrnted Cntnloflue.
$2 per week or $8 per month. COOKING AND HEATING STOVES , all guaranteed , BLANKETS AND COMFORTS , Mnilocl free on application. Order
$00 $2.BO worth per of -week goods or , $10 per mo. $4.25 , $6,50 , $8.25 , $10 , 65c , $1 , $1.75 , $2,50. from It nnd save Country store
$12O worth of goods , DOUBLE AND SINGLE LOUNGES , BOOK CASES AND SECRETARIES , keepers profit. If you wnnt to
.
$2OO $3 per worth week of goods or $12 , per month. . $4 , $6.5O , $7.75. $9.50. $3.90. $5.25 , ' $6.5O , $7.75. snvo money , be sure towrite for
$ E5 per-week or $2O per month. SIDEBOARDS AND WARDROBES , all woods , SPECIAL 1,000 Kitchen Chairs 28c a Catalogue.
$7.50 , $10 , $12,50 , $15. SPECIAL 600 Kitchen Tables 82c
ROCKERS , 16th Century , Oak or Walnut , SPECIAL 25o Kitchen Safes $3.20
$1.35 , $1.75 , $2.25 , $2.75. SPECIAL 400'Extension Tables $3.70
Call at once to avoid the rush. No trouble to show goods. Everybody invited to inspect our goods , terms and prices. Open every
OUR ILLUSTRATED evening until 9 o'clock. No interest charged. No security vequirecl. Car tickets furnished those residing at a distance. Goods sold
on easy payments , to South Omaha , Florence , Fort Omaha and Council Bluffs. Bring the children for a beautiful set of Presents for All.
picture cards.
Catalogue , Is mailed free to parties
With every purchase oflO and
ties residing nt a distance. It is ' over n set of Solid
Silver Ten
PEOPLE'S MAMMOTH
INSTALLMENT HOUSE
finely illustrated. We are filling Spoons.
on an average , 1OO Mail Orders With every purchase of$2G arid
Complete Outfitters * on-the Easy Payment Plan.
dally , which demonstrates that It over , a solid Oak Centre Table.
With every purchase of $ BO andover
Is being appreciated. 613,615,617,619 North 16th Street - - Ectwn California and Webster.
, , , , . . over , a nice rug.
THE COST OF PYTHIAN RANKS
Have They Been Oonferrcil for Less Than
the Minimum Sum ?
THE CHARGE OF A PYTHIAN PAPER ,
ICntabllKlmieiit of n I'ytlilan Iliirinl
Ground at Jit. Hope Allcgctl le-
faluatlon in the Order of
Modern Woodiuoii ,
The following editorial is clipped from the
August number ot the Knight Ertant , a
bright and newsy Pythian Journal published
in Chicago :
'Both the present grand chancellor of Ne
braska , it scorns , and bis deputies , Imvo been
conferring the three ranks of the order In
thai state for a sum less than the minimum
provided by law , on the occasion of the in-
Btitution of now lodges. This fact became
public property through the conviction of ono
of his deputies recently , nnd his suspension
the latter was vacated by the grand chancel
lor , possibly on the theory that n fellow-feel
ing makes us wondrous kind.
"Tho ti ! e is now approaching for the ses
sion of the grand ledge of Nebraska , the ro-
eults of which will bo looked for with n good
deal of interest , for twenty years the order in
Unit state had at the head of ii-s attain the
brightest men In I'ythlnn knighthood west of
the river , men of strong standing socially ,
men who commanded respect every vvhcro hi
the supreme jurisdiction , so that Nebraska
had made a name and a fame unsurpassed , In
that regard , by any grand ledge : the names
of K. K. French , George II. Grader , J. J ,
Moncll and J. S. Shropshire had a national
standing In the order that made the grand
ledge of Nebraska respected. With the last
cession in that state came a clean , -umolent-
ing sweep ; us with a sponge , the names of
tlioso whom wO were wont to nssociato with
the rise , progress anil success of Nebraska
were wiped oil the roll , and if all the relia
ble statements arc to bo credited , this result
> \as accomplished by methods by-no means
creditable to the victors , methods which
they must have imported from the sucker
state.
"With the personnel of the now adminis
tration the Knight Krrant has no acquaint
ance , therefore no fault to llnd , except it bo
that the manner of their advent. Judging
from similar experiences , gixvo hope but
slight promise election methods ns unfail
ingly bespeak the oftlcluls ns seed the crop ,
liciicc , while this Journal will jlekl to them
their Just meed of praise for what the results
evidence , ItUll look forward to the coining
session with much interest. That , which one
man , orsetof men , can accomplish others
can do , nnd it remains to bo seen whether or
not the change In Nebraska lu ISS'J brought
with it betterment. "
Urand Chancellor Macfnrlnnd was asked
what truth tucrowas lu the above statement
that the ranks of the order had been con
ferred for less than the minimum fee provided
bylaw on the occasion of the Institution of
now lodges. Ho replied that there was no
truth lu the statement. ' 'The supreme ledge
lias llxotl the minimum fee nt $10 , and It
rests with the grand lodges to Increase that
nmount as tliuy sco lit , \\lth the aiirovnlof ] [
the supreme lodge. The grand ledge of Ne
braska has llxed the minimum ut S U for sub-
ordlnatolodgai , I have hold that boforoa
lodge U instituted It is not a subordinate
but is a part of the grand ledge anil Is , there
fore , working under the law ot the supreme
lodgo. This latter body has Hxcd the mini ,
inuin fee at $10. and It is lawful to confer the
degrees upon charier members of now lodges
for that amount , Mhieh has been dono. Alter
the ledge is chartered tlio fcot must bo & ! 0 as
provided by the constitution prescribed for
eubordinuto lodges. " Some of the leading
expounders of the Pythian law hi this city
take issue with the grand chancellor on this
joint , and hold that , as the grand ledge
liaa expressly provided that "tho minimum
fee in this stnto for conferring the thrco
rnuksof the order snail bo f.'O , " there is no
power , except the grand lodge , which can
* luuigo this law and allow the conferring of the
tbreo rank * for a lost amount. This u a
point for the grand ledge to decide at its
meeting in October.
My rtlo lodge has taken the initiative In a
matter which is of great importance , to the
order and whicli will operate to the advan
tage of the entire fraternity in this city.
This is the securing of n burial ground for
the exclusive use of the order. In it will bo
burled members of the order and their fam
ilies. It Is a beautifully situated tract of
ground In Mount Hope cemetery. The lot is
triangular in sbapo nnd contains 22,000
square feet , allowing space for 5)0 graves
with u largo space In the center for the erec
tion of an appropriate monument. Back of
the triangle lifty lots hnvo been set apart for
those Pythiuns who desire to rest beside
their families la a , separate lot. Each ledge
will pay for the ground as it is required for
the burial of a member of that ledge or any
of his family.
The ofllclals of the Sioux City corn palace
have announced October a as Pythian day.
and have extended invitations to members of
the order to bo present on that day. Omaha
division No. 12 will attend hi a body on that
clay and Captain Ilnywanl has Invited nil
unattached Sir ICnlghts to accompany his di
vision on that occasion. Ho desires that nil
who wish to go should meet with the division
one night before the tlmo of
A Card front Ilonu Consul Hoot.
To the Editor of Tau DEC : Last Saturday
a dispatch was sent to the press from Chicago
cage representing that the Times had pub
lished nn Item to the effect that a suit was
instituted by Auditor Pavoy against .7. C.
Hoot , and that Root was a defaulter as presi
dent of the Modern \Voolmon for from ? ' 5- ,
000 to $10,000. A moro dastardly falsehood
was never before Imposed upon the public ,
and a greater wren ? could scarcely bo perpe
trated upon nn individual. Tno Times did
not publish such nn item , the suit accuses
nobody of default , is not a personal suit
njjalnst Hoot , but against the society , nnd
does 1'avoy no credit us its sponsor. Neither
Koot nor anybody else lias defrauded the or
der out of ono dollar , and the evidence thus
far produced will undoubtedly exonerate the
officers from any wrong whatever , OiioP.
L. AlcKiimto was removed from ofllcons
head physician of the "Woodmen f or Inatten
tion to his duties , for attempting to defraud
the order by bills for services not rendered ,
for pretended expenses which the oftlcors re
fused to pay , nnd for conspiring with confed
erates In nullify tlio charter iiml obtain n noiv
one , with himself and confederates substi
tuted In place of the legally elected ofllcers ,
nnd he has for several months since his re
moval been engaged In publishing incendiary ,
sensational nnd false statements calculated
and intended to destroy the reputation of the
ofllcorsand Injure the society itself.
The order of Modern Woodmen was
founded by .1. C. Uoot , who Is its principal
ofllcer , Anoutllfty thousand members have
been enrolled and nearly ono million of dollars
lars have been paid to the families of Its deceased -
ceased members , at u loss cost for insurance
nnd expenses than in nny other organization.
Only ono fraternal society In the United
States has * added inoro members during the
last year , und an insnna desire for revenge ,
Inspired by hatred and vindlctlveness , has
been evident in the eTorts ( made against Mr ,
Hoot and his olllcial cabinet. This lust ven
omous item was Intended to Imvo an effect
upon the olcttiou of ofllcers soon to transpire ,
but will , or ought to , provo n boomerang to
expose its cowardly author and instigator.
J. C. HOOT.
A , o. v , ir.
The supreme court of Iowa handed down
nn opinion lu the Philips' ' life | Insurance case
which was nn utllrmancoof Judge Preston's
decision. The decision Is nn Important one ,
mid affects a great many polices of Insurance
in the A. O. U.V. . and other assessment or
ganizations , At the tlmo of his death lr. I.
11. Philips held nn Insurance certlllcato hi
tlio \ , O. U. W. for S OOO which was pay-
nblo to his "legal heirs. " Ho left surviving-
him n widow and one minor daughter. 1I..M.
Carpenter was appointed the guardian of the
daughter Bessio. The widow contended that
she was entitled to bt least one-third of the
Ufa insurance. This was disputed by the
guardian of llesslo , and ono-half. of tue money
was by agreement placed in the hands of the
ilorlc of the district court until the contro
versy should bo determined In
the couitu. The widow then
brought suit against the guardian
and the clerk of the court for money thus do
posited. The case was tried by Judge Pros.
ton in December , 1883 , nnd ho decided that
when a child or children of the deceased sur
vived , the widow was not n ' 'legal heir" of
her husband , and consequently not entitled
to any of the money In controversy. Mrs.
Philips appealed from the decision to the supreme
premo court. The court of lns rcsoit ren
dered an opinion afllrmlng the decision of the
court below , nnd thus granting nil of the In
surance money to the daughter. A great many
policies in the A. O. U.V. . hnvo In the past
been written as Dr. Philips' was , and in
many Instances , on settlement , one-third of
the proceeds has been unlawfully paid to the
widow. The decision will have the eJTect of
causing a general change in the usual word
ing of such certificates whore the assured in
tend 3 that hU wife shall participate in the
benefits.
Grand Treanurcr and
Most everybody wuo takes interest in the
Masonic fraternity , has seen and hometimes
heard of R. W. Uro. John J. Gorman , whoso
services hnvo made him prominent in this
grand Jurisdiction , especially as district dep
uty , trustee of the hall and asylum , chairman
of the late Masonic fair , and now grand treas
urer , says the New York Sunday Times.
His well proportioned nnd rounded fig
ure , with n liuely-shapcd head , cheeks as rosy
as that of a young girl , with whitened locks
and chin whiskers , is familiar to those of our
brethren throughout the state who como an
nually to intend the sessions of the grand
lodge , and to whom ho has read many a peed
report and given his rino advice. Ho has also
becumo familiar to a different class of human
ity than those who holdalllllationto ourgreat
brotherhood , andttiosoaro the evil doers , for
ho is n respected and feared , though just
Judge , of the police courts.
St.
Shakespeare ledge gave Its lirst entertain
ment of the season last Wednesday at its
now quarters in Wolfi's ' hall , Twenty -second
nnd Cumlng streets. A line programme of
vocal nnd Instrumental music and recitations
was presented in which the following persons
tookpirt : Mrs , Skepcr , Miss Stribllng and
Messrs. A. Hurt , II. C. Hewitt , J. Upton ,
Chailoa Hill , Stoekdulo. T. Stribling , Wright ,
Howell , Shepherd , Kelly and Wborry. This
was followed by refreshments and then the
time was devoted to dancing. The affair
was a pronounced success socially and llnnn-
clally and rcllcctcd credit upon the lodgo.
Louis Littlclleld acted as master of ceremo
nies , ably assisted by the lloor committee ,
Messrs. Evans , Copley nnd T. Htriblinir , and
the reception committee , Mrs. II. Uvans ,
Miss Stribling and Messrs. lionden , Hill ,
Evans , Copley , T. Striblliig , J. Stribling and
J. Douglas ,
Order oTllio World.
A branch ledge of the Order of the World
was organized lost Thursday evening nt the
Paxton by electing- the following persons
ofllem : W. X Nason , past-president ; Ar
thur Jncgar , president ; Henry M. Morrow ,
vice-president : S. K. Hush , secretary ; E. M.
Stlcknoy , tieasuror ; ! ' . li Smith , marshal ;
\V. 13. Winter , guard ; W. C. McCague , sen
tinel ; W. W. Slabaugh , 11. L , . Day and AV ,
N. Donvnrd , trustees ,
George W. Collins , who was commissioned
by the supreme ledge nt Boston to organize
the Oinana ledge , wan elected solicitor ,
together with C. P. Hellloy.
The Omaha ledge begins work with over
fifty members , composed of representative
business nnd professional men. It is n secret
order and designed for social and intellectual
improvement , while , at the same time , affordIng -
Ing Its members exceptional advantages or
mutual life and accident Insurance.V. . H.
Hinslor nnd E. II. Shenfoof Council Bluffs
wen present and assisted In the ceremonies.
I. 0.0. I1.
Goodrich ledge gave Its first party of the
season Friday night , There was a largo
attendance and ft very enjoyable tlmo was h id
Dr , Birnoy euros catarrh , Dee bldff.
Jeroino 1C. Jcromo has been declared by the
metropolitan press the coming playwright.
Ilia "MuUtor of Wood barrow" U crowding ;
the Lyceum theater at each performance.
1'rior to the production of the play at the Ly
ceum , Mr , Jerome was almost unknown , his
dramatic effoits having been conllncd to
writing ono-net curtain-raisers. In tncsoho
has been highly successful In London , Muti
E. G. Gilmore and Alex Comstoclc of
he Academy , Now Pork , have just closed a
contract with Mr. Jeroino wherobvthoy will
control the rights in America of all the one-
act works of the joung author for the next
, brco years.
Dr. Charles A. Strong has been appointed
decent in psychology nt Clark university.
MeGlll university. Montreal , has received
$230,000 from Sir Dauald Smith to establish a
woman's branch.
Pi ol" . William K. Harper of Ynlo Is con
sidering an offer of the presidency of the now
Chicago university.
Eight women attended the school of law of
Boston university last year. Now nnd better
quarters tire now in preparation for them.
Stops are being taken in Troy to erect a
monument to the memory of Miss Emma AVil-
lard , who did so much for the higher educa
tion of women.
The Hev. Isaac C. ICctter , Ph. D. , president
of the Grove City col'ego ' in Pennsylvania ,
has been elected piesidcnt of Macalester col-
1 cln Mlnnoiot-i.
Ono of the cnief topics of discussion nt the
Phil-Hellenic congress which met in Amster
dam last week was the decline of Greek us a
study in European colleges.
Northwestern university at Evanston , 111. ,
has opened with a largo attendance. By the
revaluation of the university property the in
come has been Increased -r.'OO.WX ) per annum.
The university of Illinois nt Champaign
has a very largo attendance this year. About
ono hundred nnd sixty now students hnvo
entered this fall , swelling the number to MM ) .
August von IHilmcritmi , professor of polit
ical 1'iwin the university of Heidelberg nnd
author of works on the right of asylum nnd
the systematialion of international law , is
de.id. Ho was born In IS1 , ' . ' .
Lnsull .seminary , Auburndnlo , Mass. , 1ms
this bummer turned away for want of room
as many as it has been able to take. Tlio
principal's paity fora trip round the world
in eight months staits October 1.
A chair of muslo has been established at
Ynlo college by ihogilt of SJO.OOO fiom Mrs.
Ellen Itattell Eldiidge. Dr. Gustavo I.
Stoeckel , who came to the collouo about the
same time with President Dwlght , lills the
professorship.
The married women in the Cincinnati pub
lic schools have won a great victory. The
boird of education has lolnstated ns teachers
the married women recently dropped from
the rolls , The votn was 17 to 11 , and this
settles the light/which has been going on for
a year , and lias occasioned considerable
bitterness ,
A meeting of itho alumni of the Missouri
medical eollego was held In St. Lonls at the
college building , corner of Jefferson nnd
Lucas avenues ; Jor the purpoio of arranging
for a convention of the nluimil from nil parts
of the Unite-d States to meet In that city on
Octobcr4 to celebrate the semi-conteimlal of
their alma mater ;
The NortliwcJtern university at Evnnston ,
neir Chicago , the leading Mctliodist school In
the west , has elected in Its president Dr.
Henry W. Hogcrs. the pist llvo years dean of
the law school itrtho university of Michigan.
His salary U to bo S3,0 < > 0. Ho graduated
from the university at Ann Arbor In 1871.
Like tlio newi piesldcnt at Amherst. Dr.
Gates , Dr. Uogcrsis not nnonmlncd minister ,
Doano college , , Crete , Nob. , opened its now
year's work vtlthmbout ono hundred and ten
students oniollui. Two new teachers bavo
been added to the faculty. Prof. JIlKon , a
graduate of Brown university , tikes the
chair of Latin nnd modern languages. Prof.
King assumes charge of the musical conservatory
vatory , The outloilc is good. President
Perry will spend a year canvassing In the
state nnd in the oast. Mr. S. II. H. Clark
nnd wlfo Imvo given PMO to tlio college to de
fray the expenses ol bringing water Into
Merrill hull from the Civto waterworks.
M. Po/dncef , a professor of oriental lan
guages at the University St. Petsrsbnrg , has
discovered In the national library of 1'mlsa
Manelm mamiscipt which Is supposed to bo
the most ancient known. It consists of Kil
leaves of Chinese papyrus , rontalnod in four
portfolios of yellow silk , n circumstance
which has led scholars to believe that it be
longed to an Impeilal library. Tlio heading
on the title page Inn been Interpreted to
mean "Uookof Words nnd i'limaes , compiled
by order and during the sixth jonroftho
iclgn of the present M Ing dynasty. "
Dr. Hlrnoy euros cutuiTh.Ucobldg.
CHRIS COLOMB AND AMERIQUE ,
Eow Dat Qooda Man Disoov Dees Country
Ona Fina Day ,
CHAUNCEY AT DA GREATA FAIR.
Italinno KIn Blfjga Chump , Queen
Isabella Giva < la Privntn Yncht
and ClniKtoplicro Fluda
( In Simda .Hook.
Nnw YOIIIC , Scpt.2-1. [ Special toTirn Ben. ]
"Ynh , wot's do matter wit cbu , Italy } I
nin't swiped none o' yer banana 'twas '
Sudboy , dero lie's Jist warldn 'round do
cormler cull do cop 1"
Tills was the remark of a spoiled newsboy
to my Italian f richd Pcanutti Frultastand as
I approached his place of business yesterday
upon tbo Kialto.
"Cilia docopl calla do copl You takn mo
fora da fool , you scampa nowsaboy ? You
gitta out. I calla da cop fora you ; Jugga you
fora da flva dol' line and da thirt' days ; you
raaUa da monk sick inea , too 1 Hallo , Joa
Kerr , " turning to mo "you prct' ' well dessa
morn' ! "
"Quito well , I thank you , Pcanutti , " I
answered. "I thought I'd stop a moment
and get those pointers you promised mo on
the speech or address you were ( join : ? to pre
pare for Mr. Ghnunooy Dcpow to deliver at
the opening of the world's Columbian expo
sition ut Chlago. Has Mr. Dopcw been
around to see you about it yet ? And Imvo
you gotten the thing In shape ! "
"You bet ! " bo answered , "gotta da speech
downa flue grcata speech , glvn da pcop' da
trua stor''bout ' how da grcata Christoplicro
Colomb' dlscov1 dessa countra make da
peon' laugh mea tool"
"Well what is It like } Have you got It
written out ! "
" .Moi No , I not gotta da speech writta out
da Mist 'Few doa dat. I gotta du speech
Ina da head. "
"Well give it to us , " I said. "Givo mo
some idea how it goes and how Mr. IJepow
will deliver it. "
" .Alia right , alia right" said the dago , a
smirk tuldng possession of his face as ho
straightened up to address animlginary audi
ence , "You atanda there. ICccpn still ,
wattha me. Now , da Mist' 'Pew walha ouu
ona da plutaform , deasa way , maka dn bow
Ilka decs greata bigga crowd grcata man'
peop' da dappada hand Ilia dees da laugh
dayell da raisa up maka nolso Ilka da
cyaclono. Da Mist' 'Pew maka da Low
ninka da smile nodda da bead bow , bow
smile , sinilo now on dcoaa side , now on datta
sido-alla 'roun' . Den prof miecck da poop'
shuttaup , MUt'U'ew putta da Icfta hand
ona da breast , Ilka dees , putta da light hand
out inuUnda gest' , Ilka deos , clenra da volcn ,
dcesa way Hum ! A-hum I ! Hub ! Him
den walkadowii tea da front. Da crowd ver'
still-hciira da gummadrow. Him say
Lada an' iruntnman ( do poop' giva da
plauso ) I ver1 glad bco you hero. 1 vcr'glnd
you notta stay homo. I go'n1 maka speech
'bout ilecsa fair , 1 go'n'tclla you some uu
news'bout dat goota greata mun , Christo-
phero Colom' . [ Da peop' tlappula hand ;
yell Ilka da dcv'.l If Colom1 nev' dlscov'
Iloesa Ian J , Chlou ; ' nov' linvu da dirt r.trcet
Chlcag" iiov' hava do soft coal rnuka da
whlta man Ilka da nig. [ U'lnusc. ] t'hleag1
nev' havuda 1'hlla Armour to packa da pork ,
maka da soup nn1 kllladn hcg. Chicng1 not
linvadn Mayor Cregicr to runna da town dees
way. If da greata Chris not llnd Amerifme ,
Chmig1 nev' hava du grippa car , liesbava
da Parma house , nov' hava da Wldpplo innii
atta Audltorla hoatcl to lumanib' alia da
names an' da num' ofada four.i liund' rooms.
Chlcag1 nov' hava da noth1 when dat groatn
man not find doesn land. Wo not sltta here.
I not maka da speech ; Pearwtti not sella da
hanan' , Mlnnonp1 not light Hnlnta Paul , Mil-
nwauk1 not drlnka da beer , Snlnta Loucosn
not havuda vellda proph1 proccsh' , Host"n
not ( Mtn da bean , 1'hilcdelp' notln sleep , rail-
ronda men nov1 maka da strike , da rcpab'
part' ' runna du whola biz , da democrata gang
nev' live. [ Grcata 'plauso , much slapna da
hands. ]
Yes , gentaincn , decs giva tnoda mucha ,
pleas' , to inccta you an' huva da greata tall ;
'bout dat greata man. Ddt ono bigga shame
dat dcesa land have no grancla inoiiuincntl for
. da greata Chris. Ev' clt' ought hava ono
bigga nion1 fora him.
You gotta dat all wrong 'bout how him find
Ainerijue.
IIow la know ! Decs' ! way : My goota
friend Peanutl ! Fruitastand live In du Now.i
York. Him sella da fruit , sella da banan'
sella da omgo , sella da peanutti doa da
goota bU on da Broadaway , Newa York.
Him da nnnccbtor of da greata Chris. Him
bclon i to ua Colomb' lam' . Uoota man !
[ Greata . 'plausc' ! ] Ina dn archives ofa da
fain' him gotta da stralghta hist.
Him giva me datta hist' ilka decs :
Mya dad mar-r-r-lcd. Marrrono
gotta - - - - - - ono
nnma Colomb' . She mya moth' . Coloinb'
hcra fam' name clear baoic to da greata Chris ,
Da Chris notta know her notta know me.
D.it noa dll' him mya rclesh alia da same.
Wo gotta trua Mist' 'bout how him discov1
decs land. I tclla you da stralghta goods.
When dat grcata man linlsh datta jjb him
goa back to Italia an' take da goota longa
rest. Datta trip to Amerinue maka him da
ver-r-r tiered mca too ! When him goa 'way
him icr-r-r poor when him gitta back ( ilka
da goota Alderman orada congressman ; him
rich.
vc r-r-r
Live Ilka dude , Hava da dand' homo da
slika onico da grcata snap. So ono llda day
wlien him feelada pret 'mucha bet , ' him no
tea da telnphona. li-r-r-r-inga da bell. Calla
da hole hello ! Putta da horn tea da head.
Deesa way , an' say. "Give mo da connect'
four-sicUaty-one , Genoa. "
Den him wait da quite while , taka da lit'
nap while da contra 1 girl maka da conne ct.1
Pret'soon ' ono swceta volco slide downa da
wire him him ina da neck. Him waka up
an * say "Helical datta you.Uomolai ah J
YesiV111 you please huva da good
'nough come to mya ofo' bring 'longa da
typewrita maelilne , want writa da hist' mva
trip to Ameriquo. Gotta dat ! Well , gittada
move on quick.Vc wntta datta hist' outada
sight putta da French. ! cover on. Nnma it ,
' yhat taNot. " "Krootjer Snootza , " or bomo
goota name like dat. Wo gitto da nowspup'
to giva da book da bada crltizlzo gitta da
Mist' Cotnastoek aft' us. Ua book sell Ilka
da fun wo maka da mon' .
When da sweeta Itomola hoara dat she
pressa da but' ringa da bell calla da groina
giva him du 'ord to hitch upu da horse tea
du Hannsom. Him doa dat ,
Den Homola , da typowrita queen , tnka da
drive tea da house ofu da Coonb' ! . Da Chris
inccta her atta da door- give her da goota
smack da sweetu kiss Una dn 'Mericano
business man. Dey hava da nice chat da
goota vis' den da Mist' Colomb' say : "You
bring data machine ! Ycsf Goota act 1 Wo
write datta hist' I doa dat dickatsta act , you
doa da typewrita aet , joua bet.
Den htm talk llkn dees wnv.
How I llnd Ameriquo : llyDantolnfer.no
Chrlstophero Colombo.
Mya nnmo Christoplicro Colombo , I am da
George Wash of Amcrinuo da fath' ofa da
countra. I dlscov' datta land ,
I gitta born in da Genoa longa time ago. I
goa not much tea dn school dat malu mo
tired , Mya fath' maka mo work Ina da
macaroni fuet' . Notta much ! dat malm mo
tired too. Too mueha work not sulta da It il-
nno man inea too. I skippa da tralloo , Goa
to Homo. Holla da banan' ina dn bask' ona < la
nrm-makada lit'inon' snva da mon' . Son cu
da mon' "way till 1 gitta da big 'noucha w.id
to buya da Imnda org" nnd da cutca lit' inon't' '
Den la triiv' goa ev' ' place malm da mooi"
maka da mon' hava da fungit da gooli
grub make , da masii maka da love.
Mya dad write "you coma back , "
la wrllo "Notta much ; dcesa life sulta mo
tea da dot. You maka da macaroni I mnUu
da moir maka dn love makn da grcata
name. Uoesu eaith not big 'nough fora mo ,
1 go'u' Hn' some more. You wanta mo comeback
back to Genoa i No. Genoa too much lllcn
da St. Louis dead. Hat maka da monk'sick
men too ! Goota by I D.i monk'stay ona
da mad mca tool Ciiitisroi'iicuo , "
AVboi niyn fnth' read dattn let'him ' gitta
mnd tcnuula hair -ialsa Ned , Him Miyi
"Dat boy llkn da monk'-nno dutnba fool
muka mo giow old disngraco mya fam' . "
Hut dat innlui noa dlf da monk' trav' alia da
satno men too I
Dcesa way wo learn da gcog ofa da land.
Wo goa roun' nn1 roun'alia ' tlmo como back
satra place , I say : ' 'DccMa earth not so flat
nsa da reap' . Dossa earth Ilka mya head-
rouud1 1 tclla dut tea da mouU' da monk1
nodda da head Ilka him would say : "Grcata
head ! Chris-Ureata head. "
Datta idee stlcka to mo Ilka da hmk to da
dg , I telln da
Itnllnno king. Him say- ;
"
"Colombo , you one hlggn chump' ( k-ca caiL/d
flat , Other side have only da ono a clt'-i ,
Salnta Paul nn' dut alia wind , colda weatl '
an1 boom.Vo don'ta want It. You
halfa witta dago , fooli ( Juinn Wany
git up ono bigga syndicata , bnyn da twlna
scrown-ship an' givoyou one pickanlcka sal ! .
Notta much. Grov' Clove' notta ran dees !
gov' ' deesa no dcinocrnt.1 freca trnda land.
YOU go tea da dev'-go tea Spain Queen
Isabella notta smnit. You worita her. bha
( jlva you da softa snap.
la go. Plnyn da Spanish cavallero ona di
org' , da queen sticka da head outn da wind' ,
dn monk' taka olTa d.1 cap' mea too. la bay :
"Ooota morn' ! " She s > av : "Youa bet. JMA
riVi01'1 ! * loot1.mora' ! - Whut tn you wmf.t
Job ! A
la say : "Yes , wanta ship. Wnnta'scov'
Ameriquo. She say : Oharut ! Datla plncn
noa good. D.it whera da Susa A nth , '
liva. Uat whera da Pucka ana da Lifa rnis.i
dnchessanut ; dat whera da TomnwNajU
maka daplckaturo ; whera da Maega Mitch
ell runna da show ; whera da Hoffman house
runna da bar. O , yes , I lika sco datta phuu
ver' much. IIow mucn datta cost , Chris * ' '
la say. "Notta much. I want ono linc.t
bhip , da big lot mon' , da plent' salln men , den
Iiro'way ; lind dntta land ; givea you d *
whola biz. "
"Well , " she say , "I notta know Mist1
Coloinb' . I gotta put dem Mcctrh-ka wire *
ina da ground. Gotta put ono ea belli road
on da Hroadway. Oottn order .some beer
from Mlhvatik' ; HOIDO Hour from da Mir.nc-
ai'j | now sealaskin saequo Iroina da Mist1
u'nnninako. ( Jotta give ono cxpoiish or d , !
Freneha peop'knocka mo out. No , t'lu-lsto- '
Ihero , dat cost too much. You wanta di !
enrtn. "
"Notta much , " T say ; "Jest onoa-hnlf '
Den she say : "Well , I tclla you what you
tnka my privntn yacht dn Atalantn go ov1
da wat' , llnd datta land , Stick upp.i d , !
Sp.dn flag ; biing somea Americano pee > v
long back ; I giva yon da Madrid post.ioft * '
Dattn proposlsh hittn mo Ina da neck. MI
taka da Job , taka da yacht , sail ov1 da wat1
sail da greata longa time noa lamir * ITCV
land-Justa wat' wnt' , wat' ' alia da tlmo. Dn
saila men gitta tired. Wanta strike wantn
put mo ina da soup. I eeg "Wait onca moro
day-I glya you da big Macaroni din' nnd da
redda Chlanti wine. " Daa catehs da Itutiauo
men. I3cy wait.
Nexa morn' I looka out , Seca da land- ,
raiia da men wo scca ono innii on da bboie.
Him upa stump-big tulla pole. Hiino wavft
newspad' Ina da hand.
I calla out- , (
"Ah thcro-Is ! deesa land Aincrlqii" "
Him say ' < Youa bot-Decs ! Sana HoclC ,
whoyoul"
lu say-"Chri'Jtoihero ) Colomb' , I tlnda you
out. AVhoyoul" "
Him say , -'Mo ? who mol nigga Inj1 I run
deesa land. I ono Journallsta man.Vhnttj \ ;
Want dlscov' ' Ameriquo" I say. Den him
say "well , putta da bl.i wnntnd. in alia da
nowsapaps Datta how llnd whattn youi
wnnt here. Dat mnka you rich. Oa Peara
boapa man gitta rich dntta way du Sapollo
peop' da Scottu Coda Llva Oil Doy
maka du mon' datta way hero. "
I giva da man' dund. Walt fora daans' '
flnda Auicrljuc ( > , goa back. Giva da queen i
newaland. Datta all. " "Joi : Kiiiit. ' '
Dr. 23Inioy cures uaturrli , Hco bldg
Ordcrotl to Iiiliiiic. ( |
Second Lieutenant. I. M. Arrasinlth , Second
infantry , has been ordered lo proceed to
Duhuquo , Hiiilington and Jfeokuk , Ja , in th ( )
order named , in charge of tlio regimental
crultingfor tlio Sooml Infantry.
live thousand dollars Imi boon iiii
by congress to ho exix-ndcd In iVKinnio *
eiultlng throughout tlto dllTereiit states. ThH
plan of siioelnl recruiting has been adopted
with the view of obtaining nn excellent class
of men for the army , to bo taken from the
11 itionul guard of tno dllTereiit blatcs and
from the suburban towns ,
Dr. Birnoy , nebo mid throat , 13co bldy.
Nat Goodwin's season opoin October 4 alj
Minneapolis. Mabel Amber , who Imt season
supported Louis Jamoi , will bo his leadin
Dr. IJIrnoy eurc catarrh , Heo Uldjj ,