Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, June 02, 1890, Page 5, Image 5

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    THE COMMERCIAL TRAVELER ,
A Brilliant Old Boy Dioi in the Douglas
County Poor House.
"BOB" PEYTON'S ' SORRY ENDING.
! TIic WroitK flfnn Tracked A Ijlttlo
Girl That AViw "on" Ilr lit
Iilncs ofl'ootrj' Palatial
Club I looms.
On His First Tour.
ilo pill up nt n wnysiilo Inn
In HrntUcboro * county ,
i cotildti'l ' rjulto supprrM the grin
l by Its bounty.
He chaffed tlio vokcls ranged about ,
Kxrlting wildest laughter ;
With iinrk'iit Jests ho made them shout
Until they shook each rafter.
Quaint observations from htm rilled ,
Pertaining to the tavern ,
And e'en the provender that filled
Ills hunger's aching cavcni.
At last , worn out br Jokes sublime ,
The drummer , sad and weary ,
Began the slinky stair to climb ,
To K'tlu ' the pillow chOrry.
Ho doffed his clothing , checked and brown ,
Anil then , his full strength throwing
Into liln chest , began a-down
Tlio great lamp chimney blowing.
The lamp against this action rash
Emitted ftovcnil Hashes ,
And giithcicd in nis grc.it mustache ,
Ilia eyebrows and eyelashes.
Ho fled , llko any sheeted ghost ,
Downstairs , head first nml fleetly ;
It nil was clear unto the host ,
Who murmured softly , sweetly :
"You first the wick should downward turn ,
Then blow , not like a gampus ,
But llko the /cphyr la the fern ,
Upon the quiet campus.
"You bring to mind , I must Insist.
That object of nil pity ,
The guileless agriculturist
Hotclllng In the city I"
/ { . If. M. in VucJt.
Death of "Hob" Peyton.
"IJultlo Ills bones over the Btonos.
llo's only it piiupor vrlinm nobody owns. "
Never did these words , that have been re
peated the world over , suggest a more in
tensely melancholy meaning than when ox-
cmpllllcd yesterday In the burial from the
Douglas eounty poor house of as brilliant a
man as ever went down to a pauper death.
The lines are hard , indeed , and pity 'tis
that fnto ordained them ever to describe the
close of Robert S. J. Peyton's career.
Many business men and pirtlculnrly trav-
ellug bnlcsmon will bo shocked at the an
nouncement , for only a little more than six
months ago Poyton was swinging over the
country a prinuo of good fellows among u
host of friends.
The why and wherefore of his rapid de
scent is boat and most fully told by that old
expression ho was his own worst enemy.
And In this enso liqUor was the principal part
of that worst enemy.
Six weeks ago County Poormaster Ma-
lioncy found a man in the Bohemian quarter
of the city who was "about dead and hadn't
u cent. "It was learned that the noor follow
had been wandering aimlessly about down
then. ' until ho hccamo too1 weak to stand and
had charitably been given food and shelter ,
such as they were , by the occupants of a
hovel. After keeping him for some time and
being unable to do so longer the occupants
notified Mr. Mahoney , who came nnd re
moved the stranger to n ward in the poor
house. The Immediate circumstances of his
sinking to such a condition , or how it was
that ho ctinio to bo In that part ol the city
will perhaps always remain a mystery ,
though it was probably thu result of a long
continued spree.
When ho came to a full
realisation of being in the poor
house and n dying man ho scaled his
lips as to his family connections , and stolidly
uwnlteu tlio speedy death which hta excesses
had now brought incrltnbly near.
Ho was educated in Scotland nnd was
probably the mostexport chemist over turned
out by n European school.
But he couldn't let liquor alone , and soon
after hl.s making u brilliant start In the world
ho became almost hopelessly within its
power.
Ho was with several of the leading drug
houses in the country. Atone time ho was
chemist for Park , Davis & Co. , Detroit , the
largest wholesale drug house In America.
Ho was also chemist of the Omaha Medical
college for n long time.
At the time of his doconso ho wai forty-
eight yours old. Ho Is said to hnvo been mar
ried , although as yet It has been impossible
to ascertain anything in the way ot informa
tion regarding his family relations.
Too bad. too bad , that so bright , so genial
nnd cnpablo man as "Bob" Poytou should llud
u grave In the potter's Held.
Tnoklnd tlio Wron/j / Man.
, , E. Strausbergcr , who travels out of Chicago
cage , tolls Tin ; BRI : that ho has n first class
kick a coming , and ho seems to bo very right
about it. Last Saturday in ICcurnoy an ox-
pressman named F. L. Sutton , and who is
No II , charged him ? t.tiO for moving six
trunks 100 feet , or from the Union Pacific to
the B. it M. depot. Mr. Expressman evi
dently thought ho had a veritable Jay in tow.
Upon discovering his mistake ho cut his hill
in two , but Mr. Strosburgor proceeded to In
form the mayor ot the city regarding the im
position nnd the prospects are that Sutton's
bulldo/tng break will cause him to pay $10
uud costs bo fore ho gets dona with the travel
ing man from Chicago.
If moro of the boys on the road would take
the pains to make cxamules out of these fol
lows who try to impose on thorn it would
work a vast deal of cosh good to the profes
sion In .
gcnurul. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ Oiniilm Brothers Plonso Notice !
The organization of the commercial travel
ers of Now Orleans materialized last week ,
at the elegant club rooms , No. 4 Carondelot
street when 150 "knights of the grip , " to
gether with a host of Invited guests , as-
icmbled to do honor to the occasion. The
Commercial Travelers' association dates its
oxlstonro from the early part of the year ,
nuil their tlrst recorded effort at concerted
action was incidental to the mnrdi-gros fes
tivities. Then it was that the necessity of
suitable club rooms became manifest , and
earnest effort has resulted in securing their
present magnificent quarters. The old Bos
ton club building was decided upon ns n suit-
j.Vilo location , and to suit the convenience ot
the iiioml i-s , elaborate alterations and 1m-
proveinonltt were made , placing the
commercial travelers' club room
among the models of its kind In the
city. Entering the spaelous hallway and go
ing up u ( light of Ilrusbcl-cnrputL'd stairs the
parlors are reached. These parlors are lux-
wlously furnished with velvet Brussels carpets -
pets , tapestried chairs and suttees. Pioof-
vjj piint engravings ami paintings line the richly
r im pored walls. A handsome carved ma-
hoginy Emerson piano and costly statuary
complete the surroundings of elegance and
com tort. To the rear of the parlors Is the
Hitting room , leading to n bar. The third
lloor Is occupied ns the billiard and pool
room , two Urunswick-Balko and Collender
blllliml tnbhw and ono pool table constituting
the outfit. Buth rooms , store rooms and pri
vate sitting rooms nro distributed throughout
thn remaining portions of the building , each
npartmcnt being provided with electric bells.
Quito Wlinl08ninn.
Oh , knight ot the grlo , on your maiden
trip , listen unto mo. * Beware of all , there's
many u fall , Hill your second trip
you'll seo. First , don't know more than
all the rodt who over made the trip , for they
know you well and they'd laugh llko well ,
, nt the amount of "duds" In your grip. Don't
got "too noon" with the chamber maid , with
> ' 'btop in and see my sample * . " She may
glvo you one , with bet1 strong right arm , iu
on your form she tramples. Don't make a
tluto with u waiter girl because her eyes are
bright , " \o-a-s aho will go walking , not
ul'owwl ' to do talking , " and you'll wait out-
8)1 ) night. Don't ' taiw t. "sister" or a
"wife , " the hoU-1 clerk rends yon through.
and the laws can pull hard , as In the case of
the "Bnrd" who has never slnco been "two. "
Don't paint n town red , or get the big head.
Don't get so your clothes are two small , Just
shut your mouth close , nnil the next trip , of
course , you'll think you know more than it
alt. The Uoad.
Very Itl/tlit / Imtocil.
Ai n rule the merchant can bo better satis-
fled by making his purchases from the travel
ing man than by Indulging in n personal ex
cursion to the house , ay the Denver Grocer.
Tlio reason of this Is plain from the fact that
you are approached Instead of approaching.
Tne.ro U a reputation to be sustained by the
drummer and It consists In selling goods
where goods nro not wanted. To do this ho
Hashes up every Inducement mid quotes his
very lowest prices. The samples ho displays
nro tlio newest , the freshest and the best
adapted to the trade. Hells your friend at
the house , lights for your /interests / and sees
your orders nro shfppccl promptly. While
your presence ut hcadquijrtern shows you nro
In quest of something , and in consequence ,
stiff prices nro given/anil In the mammoth
variety you nro apt to overstock or purchase
n mess of unsalable trufck of which you would
scorn to think of whllu badgering the travel
ing man of the house ; ' on your own dung heap.
The Kprliifc Hen Joke.
.DIclwon of Chicago , ono of the gravest and
most polite men on the road , stopped at a
hotel not long ago where spring chicken was
the piece do rcslstanu of the menu. When
the waiter brought his portion to him he tried
it with his knife , and then critically began to
examine It. The waiter noticed him and
coming around , suld :
"What's do inatlah , boss ! Anything
wrong wid dat chlckinl"
"No waiter. There's
, nothing wrong as
far as I can discover. "
"What fob yo' done look at hit dnt away ,
den I"
"Did you say It was spring chicken ,
waiter I"
"Yes , boss , dat's what do bill says. "
"Ah ! Weil , I was merely looking for the
spring , that's all. Please bring mo my des-
bcrt. "
She "Was "On. "
Wostboro Tribune , : The commercial
traveler's little daughter had been taught al
ways to conclude her little prayers with these
words :
"Cod bless papa and bring htm safely homo
Saturday night. "
Ono week he came homo Friday , and that
night ho heard the Infantile [ volition solemnly
rendered , but with the following startling and
philosophic addition :
"Clicstnuts , Lord I Ho hero now I"
Samples.
It will bo pleasing to the many friends of
Henry A. Ilirscy , so long n member of the
old Pioneer tobacco company of Brooklyn , N.
Y. , and Henry A. Hirsoy As Co. of Chicago ,
and a frequent visitor to Omaha In tlio inter
est of plug tobacco , to know that ho Is again
In the Held in the Interest of James G. Butler
As Co. of St. Louis.
The annual meeting of the Missouri divis
ion of the Travelers' Protective association
was held nt St. Louis last week. The report
of the president' shows the association to hnvo
DM active members and -Oil associate mem
bers. Last year the association had 120 ac
tive and -r , > associate members , which shows a
very excellent increase Indeed.
Oinnlin Sunday Guests.
At the Casey A. AV. Vandcrman , Denver ;
A. C , Minor , Chicago ; H. P. Snoll , Chicago ;
J. E. Darbolly , Chicago ; II. W. Farrar , Kan
sas City ; IJ. W. Gelds by. Kansas City ; E. H.
Dyna , Chicago ; B. E. Sprately , Memphis ,
Tenn. ; AV. C. Burroughs , Now York ; D. J.
Tippott , Brooklyn. N. Y. : D. Zortmnn. Har-
rlsburg ; J. A. Testman , Chicago ; .T. F. Kir-
kcndall , Chicago ; H. C. Gates , Chicago : B.
F. Mycr , Cincinnati , O. ; C. L. Bar
ber , Cleveland , O. ; II. J. Lockard ,
Piltsburg , Pa. ; T. S. Farrel , Boston ;
G. B. McCalmont , Bradford , Pa. ; George D.
Hall , Boston , Mass. ; J. F. Williams , St.
Louis. Mo. ; K. A. Austin , Chicago ; C. G.
Winters , Cincinnati , O. ; J. H. Talmadgo ,
L. M. Bennett , Chicago ; J. H. Bliss , citv ;
W. H. Webster. New York ; T. A. Thompson ,
Chicago ; T. Gering , Cincinnati , O. ; J. G.
Chose , St. Louis , Mo. ; John Ulngling , W.
Minor , Chicago ; W. F. Slater , Denver , Col. ;
C. P. Hill , St. Paul ; W. E. Carroll ,
Chicago ; J. E. Hosmcr , Auburn , N. Y. ;
N. B. Smith. Chicago : L. M. Bennett , Chica
go ; H. Mitchell , Chattanooga , Tenn. ; J. M.
Jnncll , St. Louis , Mo. ; Charles H. Carpenter ,
Chicago ; F. G. Chase. St Louis , Mo. ; W.
Husch , Chicago ; William Hudson , Chicago ;
C. McClcllan , Chicago ; W. Ware , Philiidel-
phin ; C. A. AVortman , Chicago ; L. Tanner ,
Philadelphia ; H. P. Strake , Chicago ; W. J.
Davis , New York ; C. J. Hull , Boston , Moss. ;
William Scott , Milwaukee , W-Is. ; F. W.
Moss. Chicago , E. B. Griflln , Kansas Citv ,
Mo. ; A. M. Stone , Philadelphia ; G. W.
Okcs , Baltimore , Mil. ; E. C. Brnge , Balti
more. Md. ; L. U. Waterman , Alb-iny , N.
Y. ; J. E. Comstock , Now York ; B. F. Hill ,
St. Joseph , Mo.
An Absolute Cure.
The ORIGINAL ABIETINE OINTMENT
Is only put up In largo two-ounco tin boxes ,
and is an absolute euro for all sores , burns ,
wounds , chapped hands and all skin eruptions
Will positively euro all kinds of piles. Ask
for the OHIGINAL ABIETINE OINT
MENT. Sold by Goodman Drug company at
23 cents per box by mail 30 cents
A ljir/o ; Petroleum Steamer.
A largo potrolouin tank steamer has
jubt boon livunchod in England. It was
built for 11 Perhin.il linn for the transport
of potrolouin between liiiku and Astra-
lean. Tlio steamer , which is built in
two halves so that it can bo taken to
pieces for the siilco of passing looks , is
53 foot long , 28 foot broad and 11 foot
tloon , She carries largo steam pumps
for the lillin" and emptying of the voa-
sol. Thcro is also accommodations for
pnssongors , both on dock and In a sa
loon , and oleotrio lights are used on-
tiroly.
The qunlttv of blood depends much upon
good or bad digestion and assimilation ; to
make the blood rich In life and strength giv
ing coiibtltucntfi , use Dr. J. H. McLean's
Strengthening Cordial and Blood Puriller ; it
will nourish the properties of the blood from
which the elements of vitality uro drawn. $1
per bottlo.
A Vigorous Klokor.
Joseph Mansfield of Elizabeth , N. J. ,
in a young man who plays foot ball , and
thu other night us ho was coming homo
three dogs attacked him. With a line
drop kick lib laid ono dead , sent a second
end Hying in tlio air with several broken
ribs and BO scared the remaining dog
that ho ran away.
Tlio only railroad train out of Omalfn
run expressly for the accommodation of
Omaha , Council BlulTri , Dos Molnes and
Chicago business is the Rock Island
vestibule limited , leaving Omaha at 4:10 :
p. m. dally. Ticket oflleo 1002 , Sixteenth
and Fanmm St. , Omaha.
Northern IMou In Gooi-gln.
The Northern men residing at Atlanta
have organized the Northern Society of
Georgia. Its object is to promote social
intorconrso , to dissemlnato reliable in
formation concerning tlio south , to dis
courage sectional animosity and to promote -
mete now enterprises and industries.
Ghanga of Hfo , backache , monthly trregu
larttles , hot flashes are cured by Dr. Miles'
Nervine. Frcosamplcs at Kuhu & Co. , 15th
and Douglas.
AStronj ; Will cm aSlnto.
Seven of the
supposed-to-bo-sharpost
and wisest lawyers in the country litxvo
made wills , passed away , and the said
wills have boon broken all to tllnters by
heirs and other lawyers. An Ignorant
Missouri farmer wrote his will in four
lines on a slate and it stood three law
suits and ton lawyers.
* '
Fits , spasms , St. Yltus dance , nervousness
and hyatorla tire soon cured by Dr. Miles'
Nervine. Free sampless at Kuhu & Co. , 15tu
and Douglas.
Never TattotlVntcr. .
There is u ludy living in Clarke county ,
Ga. , who has never tasted or taken a
drink of water in her life.
WEDDED USDER DIFFICULTIES.
AtlanUx Constitution : Bony Driggors
was a chnrnotot' .
Nature exhausted herself in adding n
variety ot Incongruous supplements to
his make-up that were continuous sources
of surnrlso and dismnv to his parents ns
they developed , one by one , during his
growth.
Ilis face \vns n study in physiognomy ,
from the roots of hay-colored hair , down
to his narrow , retreating forehead to
where his squint eyes bulged out like
twin beacons set on either side of the
base of the promontory of his circumlo
cutory nose. M
Beneath the twisted beak of that
snuflling appendage yawned iv mouth
that was protected by n row of yellow ,
preluding teeth , so gruesome that they
kept the thin upper Up in perpetual re-
trelit.
Poor Bony ! Ills real name was Na
poleon Bonaparte Driggors , which was
such n cruel satire on the looks of the
boy that folks called him Bony , for pity's
Bake. If his face was ugly his llguro
backed it up. Stoop shouldered and
narrow chested , his legs wore so crooked
that it was said that his mother used a
reap hook in measuring the clothes for
his breeches.
Aloro than this , ho talked through his
nebo and listened well , ho didn't listen
much , for ho was deaf as n post , and
nothing short of a yell in his good car
could make him understand.
In the same community lived a maiden
whoso unlovolinesd was a nightmare for
the dream of Bony Driggors.
That was Samanthy Slayback. Tall
and tiresome , she tried to reduce her
altitude by curving out her spine and
pulling her thin neck down betwixt her
angular shoulders. Her features were
regular in their irregularity. Her keen
little green eyes could scarcely discover
lhatinof her turnod-un nose , and she
had practiced a smirk until her lips
were twisted clear out of lino.
Her head was covered with a shock of
brick-colored hair , and there were two
colors of freckles on-her thin , woa&cned
checks. One sturdy champion remained
of all her front teeth , and that stood out
in an aggressive manner , as if dofyinp
the ravage's of time. Against this tusk
rested a snuff-brush , in a nonchalant ,
devil-may-care sort of n way , as if it
were a constant reminder of the inde
pendent spirit of its bearer.
You might have dropped a plumb-
line from the point of her chin to the
tips of her toes , and there would have
been no contact between it and her live
feet six of perpendicularity.
Worst of all , she was near-sightedand
was consequently kept .in blissful ignor
ance of her make-up , as she could not
press her nose and chin close enough to
the looking-glass to enable her to see
her own imperfections.
Tins hopeful couple fell in love. Not
as things generally go , altogether by
contraries in such matters ; but on the
other hand , their similtitudo was only
marred by different styles of uncomeli-
ness.
ness.One would have supposed that in such
an aflair as thisif the parties wore satis-
fled with each other , no one else could
could possibly have the heart to com
plain , but such was not the cubO.
Old man Slayback disliked Bony most
heartily , and ho said :
"Ef that blasted yeath worrum puts his
foot inside o' my door I'll larrup the hide
ofT'n 'im. The idee o' my S'manthy boiu'
tied up with sich a low down pack as
'ere ! ' I'd 'im in
that W'y see Poky taglio
fust ! "
* # # # * * * * *
In tbo same neighborhood , but on the
other bide of the river lived 'Squire
Loathorhead , who was an inveterate
lishorman and an mediocre farmer.
Ho would not have given one hour on
the banks of the Ockolookoocheo river ,
in red-belly season , for the finest ton-
acre field of corn in the county.
'Squire Lcathorhead and I were great
cronies , and muny's the day wo have sat
on the banks of that sluggish stream and
watched our feathered corks floating on
the curling eddies of wine colored water ,
waiting for a nibble , while the soft
winds crooned a lullaby among the
swaying boughs of the btalwart nines ,
and the red birds lUtted from brutto to
brake like a Hash of light illuminating
the sombre surroundings.
One morning in the early part of May
I chanced to bo at Squire Loathorhead'H
home , anil alter a low squints at uiomcy
ho thrust his finger into his mouthwith
drew it and holding it up a half minute ,
remarked :
"I knowod it. Dad burn it ! Yo can't
fool me. The win's f'om the sou'west ,
an * the weather's gwine to clear up. I'll
bet yo my hat wo kin just rope in the red
bellies this mornln' . "
"Isn't the river too full ? " I asked.
"No o. I hoarn from it yistiddy , an'
hit's folio lii. Jest'the right time.
Moon's south at 'leben o'clock , an' I'm
gwino a-IIshing' . "
"What about that piece of grassy
corn ? "
"Oh , ding the corn ! I'll marry a
couple 'foro the week's out , an' make 'om '
pay mo a dollar , an1 that'll hire two
hands for a day , an' I'll take them an'
the old emorn nn' the younguns , an'I'll
clean that corn patch as slick as peas. "
The result of the argument was as
might have been expected. I was long
ing to try my luck in those tempting
waters , and my argument was made
solely to stimulate the 'squiro.hi his de
sires.
So , gathering up our tackle , after
turning over a few slabs in the eelworm
bed , and securing a nice lot of those
miniature- reptiles that are so irresisti
ble to the taste of a red-belly , wo started
away.
By the way , do you know they culti
vate those worms down there ? A little
orimson worm , from one to thrco inches
long , white stripes around them and a
knot near the middle , and they smell
worse than a nigger chopping cotton.
But the big , glistening , red-bellied
porch loves them bettor than a baby
loves stick candy. Hook a couple of
them on a small Limerick brad hook
that has boon woven on to a fine silk
line witli a light cork on it , and the
upper end of the line fastened to a long ,
tapering cane polo , and you are iixed for
tisning.
O , my beauty. But I am digressing
from my story , and I must return to my
subject.
The sun rode high in the heavens
when we reached the bluff whore the
'squire kept his boat tied , and as wo
scrambled down the bank he peered
anxiously beneath the foliage of the big
tupelo , and , turning to mo with a look
of disgust , ho ejaculated :
"Durn my liver of the boat ain't gone !
Some cuss o' the earth has stoled that
boat. I wish I had 'im 'twixt my thumb
an' linger ; I'd crack 'im like a mlt the
' ! "
good-for-nothin'hollyon
"That's rough luck , " said I.
"Yes , an1 we'll hatter llsh f'om the
bank. The moon'll soon oo south , so
here's at it , dad drat it. "
Suiting the notion to the word , wo
were BOOH seated in the shade of the
overhanging bank , watching our corks
for a bite.
* t
"Ilellol"
The challenge came from across the
stream , and the echoes wont flying
holtor-bkoltor through brake and fen ,
and wo both started with surprise , for
there appeared on the opposite bank a
man aim woman.
"Hollo ! " ' "
answered the 'bqulro , "what
d'ye want ? "
"Wo want to crofcj , " answered the
woman.
"Boat's gone , " Bold ( ) io 'squlro. "Who
niro yo ? ' '
"lilt'fl mo an1 Bony , "cried the woman.
"Mo an' S'manthy , " squeaked the man.
"Great joowhllHkinHl" exclaimed the
'Squire to mo , "I'll but hit's a runaway
match well , what iti the thunder an'
bluO blazes airo yo ur ) to ? "
"Who alro you ? " squealed the maiden ,
whoso near-sightedness was such that
she could not rocoghlzo him.
" 'Squiro ' Lcathcrhcad don't yo know
'
She turned to her companion and wo
could hear her repeating to him the
name of the 'squire , for Bony's deafness
prevented his hearingncrosstho stream.
"Is that you. 'squire ? " squeaked Bony.
"In course hit's mo. What in the name
o' common sense d'ye all want ? "
"We've run away , and pap's a'tcr us ,
an' maybe bud Joab. with the gun. Oh ,
Lordyl" squealed S'manthy , as she laid
her iiead on Bony's shoulder , apparently
heart broken.
"Wo want to got merrlcd , 'Squlro-
yelled Bony , as ho pressed his arm
around her waist and tried to assume as
defiant an attitude as his bow logs would
permit , "Can't wo git across ? "
"Kin yo swim ? "
"Bony kin , but i can't , " sobbed
S'manthv.
"Let 'im take yo on 'is back. "
She repeated the suggestion to Bony ,
who released his hold of her waist and
drew back from the bank of the stream.
"He's afcard to rcsk it , " whindled
S'manthy. "Oh , merry , Lordy , what
shall I do oo hoe hoe ? "
Have yo got the licenses ? ' ' bawled the
'Squire.
"Yes , sir , Bony's got 'em , " and ex
plaining to her lover the purport of the
query , the latter pulled oil' his hat and
removed from the crown a white paper
which ho hold up yelling :
iioro iney uiiu , oijiiiru ; ai nuu ,
sealed an' delivered , so help mo God ! "
"I'm not a-swoarln' ye , ye blamed
idjit. Kin yo read 'om'r
"Say's 'kin yo read 'em ? " said S'man
thy to Bony.
"Yes , siree. Ef yo doubt my wordI'll
show yo , " and ho proceeded to spell out'
the words , ono by one.
"That'll do. 1 b'lievo yo'ro straight ,
but of vo fool me , I'll wring yo're blamed
neck , an' yourn too , S'manthv. Do yo
wantcr git merriod ? " cried 'Squiro at
the top of his voice.
"Yes , " shrieked S'manthy.
"That's what we're hero fur , " yelled
Bony , who for the first time underbtood
a question.
"Well , I'm a reglar 'looted jesttco o'
the peace for the twenty hundred
and twcnty-fi'th dcestrick under
stand ? "
"Yes , " cried S'manthy.
"I do"yelled Bony.
"I tell yo what I'll do ( great powers
' ' ' crink in neck
o' Yourip , I'm gottin'a my
hollorin' bo much ) ef yo'll answer the
questions I'll harness yo up 'thout
cross'n the river , scoin'b yo'ro in sioh a
conniption. "
"Will vo " , shore 'nough ? Oh no
hoe hool" " shrieked S'manthy , "hoi'
mo up , Bony , fur I b'liovo I shall shuro-
lydie. "
"Did yo hear me , Bony ? "
"Ycb , an' much obleogcd. "
"Look out then. Pick yor years , so's
yo kin hear the deckle-ration , Bony , ad'
min' now , you'vo got tor come an' gimme
two days' work soon's yo kin cross the
river , yo hear ? " '
"Yes , I'll be thar. "
"I'll come , too , " shrieked S'manthy.
"An' bring them licenses , so's I kin
sign 'om in form o' law. "
"I'll tend to that , " cried S'manthy.
"Hero goes Dearly , beloved ? wohave
met , tcrgether ( watch my hook thar )
to , silibrate kin yo hear ? "
"Yes , " answered S'manthy.
"Yes , " answered Bony , bending for'
ward with his good ear turned toward
the 'Squire , in an attitude of intense at
tenlion.
"A-hem ! Whar wus I ? ( Ding the
luck ! I b'lievo I got ii bite. Pull up my
hook and see'f the baits eat oil ) . Iioro
we go Bonv. Driggcrs , do , you , take ,
that , 'ore SNmanthy , Slayback , to bo ,
yore , lawful , an' wedded , wife ? ( O , the
devil , I loft out part , but hit's only a
form ) "
"What must I say ? " yelled Bony.
"You hoi' your grip. I'm ruiinin1 this
'ere shebang. The answer is , 'I do ? ' "
"Mus' I bay it ? "
"In course , yo infernal idjit "
"I do oo ? "
"Now S'manthy , hit's yore time
( Watch my cork thar ; I b'liovo ' to my
soul hit's a red belly ) S'manthy , Slay-
back , will , you , talco , that , 'oro. Bony ,
Driggers , fur yore lawful an' wed
ded husban' , to btiok to him ( Drat
the luck , I've btrainod my voice bo's I've
forgot the form "
"What mus'Ibay ? "
"Don't say nothin' , yo blabted nuin'-
skull , till I tell yo to , stick , to , him ,
through , thick an'thin ( Durn it , that's
not adxactly the way ; out it soun's like
poultory an' they wan't know the ditl'-
or'nco ) "
"Ai'ro yo waitin' on mo ? " cried
S'manthy.
"Shot up , I toll yo. Hain't yo got no
sense ? ( For God's bake , watch my cork
whar was I ? ) toll , death , you part ?
D'ye hear , S'manlhy ? "
"I wl-111"
"O durnationl Wo hain't got to that
yit. "
O av hav , hav ! Won't ho never git
done ? Hoi' mo up , Bony , fur I b'liovo I
shall shorely die "
"Shot up , I toll yo. The answer is 'I
will. " '
"I wl-ll-11 ! I tol' yo that onct. "
"None o' ycr impydonco. .lino yer
right hnn's ( thar wont that cork abob-
bin' agin. ) Know , all , men , by these ,
presents ( Is that the way it starts oil ?
No , lommo see , Ef , thar's , anybody , hero ,
present , what's , got , any , objections , to
this , ere , percoedin' , lot , them , say , so ,
now , or forever , hoi' , tho'r peace kin yo
hoar ? "
"Yes , " answered S'mnntha , "do hurry
ui ) . Pap's a'tor ub , an' I b'liovo I shall
faint "
' * Keep nulot , I toll yo. ( I'm goltln' a
whoppin' bite watch my cork a intuit. )
In , the , name , of , the , btato , of , Georgy ,
I , pro-nounc.o , you. man , an' wife , an' ,
whom , God , hath , j'incd , to-gothor , lot ,
no , man ( watch that cork ) put , asunder !
Salute vour bride '
And down the bank ho scrambled ,
grabbed his rod , and dl'ow out a great ,
shinning redbolly , while S'manthy
reached down and droiv Bony so close to
her loving bosom Hint she lifted him
clear oil the ground ; but Bony was good
grit , and clung to harngek llko a "pos-
bum to a porslmmon'limh.
"Now airo yo satisfied ? " bawled the
'squiro. ,
tbl am of Bony Is. "
"I'm shore I fool mighty good ovnr it ,
nn' I kin ' . "
never furgit you , 'squire.
"Don't yo furgit to come an1 do them
two days' work. "
"Wo 11 bo thar a day a'tor tomorror ,
of the weather's lltton , " cried S'manthy.
"Yo mus' como to see us , an' bring
your ol' omorii to see my ol" omoru ,
soon's wo git fixed up , " yelled Bony , with
a bowloggcd swagger.
"Yo bettor git out , now , stiddlor stop-
pin' thar , for the ol' man Slaybaok 'if
eon a'moat maul the stullln outrn you ol
ho ketehos yo afore ho cools olT. I/.l git-
tin' another blto look out , " and ua the
happy couple disappeared , ho lauded
another big rod belly.
I drew up my hook and a cooler had
gnawed all the bait olT while I won
wutchlnff the wedding under difficulties.
As the elements that give color to the rose arc conveyed in the
sap that circulates through the capillaries of the shrub on which it
grows , so docs the blood convey the elements that paint the check
of beauty with the ruddy glow of health "The bloom of opening
flowers. " But in order that this beautifying process of nature may
be in the highest degree successful , it is important that the san
guinary fluid be kept in that pure and wholesome condition so
surely and so easily attainable through the use of S. S. S.
ItafceplMsureln jubrnHtlnffthe following statement of facti thai you may know Ihacrcat
benefit that tui resulted from the use of your Specific In the case of my lilt c daughtei. now ten
jcars of asc. The child , when two years of ace , had a severe a tack of scarlet fever , which left her
with nslialtetcd constitution. Amonsr other evidences of Impaired nutrition. \ % swhat tic doctors
called softening of the bones. In her tilth year she happened to a slight accident which resultccln
the dislocation of the hli > joint , and. from flip Iritatlon thus set up , terrible ab c c ol tlm hip
ensued. The nbccssos , despite the best medical treatment that couU bo obtained , remained for
thrco jeais , discharging continuously. At this time , through the influence of friends , I put her
° " > Whcn this treatment was commenced the abccss was very large , having six perforations , PUM
discharging through them all. During this treatment several spFculao of bona came out , ami by
the time she had finished her fifth bottle the abscess had entirely healed , her appetite and general
health had been restored , In
shorj fafattst
, , Slatington. P. .
In'itniitlv stops the most oxcriiclatliie pains1 novnr falls ( o ulvo onsp to the sulToror.
For PAINS , llKPISr.S , IIAdKALMIK , CONGESTIONS , INFLAMMATIONS. Klir.UMA.TISM ,
NEUKALOIA , Sl'IATIfA. IIKADAC1IE , TOOTIIAI'IIK , or nny otltur PAIN , a row appllcu-
loiis nio llko inaKlc , cnuilMx thu puln to instantly slop.
A CURE FOR ALL BOWEL COMPLAINTS.
Internally taken In closes of from thirty to sixty drops In a half tmnldor nt water will euro In
n few minutes Cramp. Hpralns , SoiirStnniacli , ( 'olle , I'latiileiicc , Heartburn , t'holora Morbtib ,
Dyscntry * DlnrrliiPii , Sick lloadaolio , Naiixoa , Vomiting. Nervousness , Sleeplessness , Malaria ,
uiul all internal pains arising fiom change of diet or wutur or other causes
BO cents n bottlo. Sold by all Druggists.
I. De TURK'S
CALIFORNIA
Riesling
Zinfandel.
ChoicestProduction. : : .
FOU SAI.K UV
I Wholesale
F.Denon'Co , [ "quor Dealers.
Heimrod & Hansen ) Grocers and
Henry Pundt , f Liquor Dealers.
DoTinU H-XliifatulorMiiiaiioiieoraiiioii ) ; Ainorl-
cau Wlnub. whllulluiiuuls tlio bust Iiupoituil olaiuls.
The Omaha Medical and Surgical Institute.
ForthefrPitmentofnUCIinomCANnBrnOIOAI. DISBAflrs. llrnccs Appliances for IJoformItlea , anfl
Iruitva. II at ln"llltleii , Appnralu. nnJ lleniertles for Huccassful trivilmpm of or ry furm of dlnonio ru-
qulrtns.Meillc.il or SurgUnriroatruflnl. NlNK'l'Y HOOSIfl roll I'ATIKN'IH. lloanl nnil nttonilnnco. Haul
Ariouinioitatlnuri . \Vrlto for circulars on I'oforndtloi ami llr'irrg , Trimoi , Club Kent , Curvaturoa of
i'plno , I'lloi , Tumors , Cimcer , Cntarrb , llronehltli * . lull IntiOD , U.'oitrlclty , I'anilynls. lipilarny , Ktilnor ,
Illtdder , llyc. Knr. t-kln nnd Die-oil , an I all Surgical Ororntloiu. DlallABKS OK WUMK.V a "prcljlty. Hook
Of DlteiiBOB of Womun rroo.Vo linvs IMely adilod a l.ylne-ln rupsrtmunt fur Women durln < < Conllueuiont
( Btrlcily 1'nvnlo ) Unly Kollnbla McdlcnllnntUute miklne nnpecliilty of 1'IUVATI : UlSKAS S.
All llloo'l llion oi micfcaifullytioitoJ. SypblUtlo uolson romovoil from the nyitein w.thotit inoronrj.
Neir llestorRtlTOTrontmrnt for Loss of Vila ) l'o er , Pnrt'ei nnnblo Io vlalt u. Innjr uo tronlod ntlioino hy
corr .pomonco ! AllcouimunlcntUinaoonndontlnl. Wocllclnu nr Inatrgmontn iteot l > y mull or oxpro > . , o-
ourely imckel , no morku to Inillcnlooonttnto or render. Ono porfonal lut'irvlow urnforrod. Call nnd icniull
n or send history of your caio , and wowlllnend In plain wrntiporour HOOK TO MhN KHKIi , uuon 1'rlvato
Bp clalor Nervuus Dlseasoa , Impoloncy , Hyrbllln , Gleotnnd Varlcooelo. nltliquoitlon 11(1. Aildren
Omaha Medical and Surgical Institute ,
Corner Olh and Harney Sts. . Omohn , Neb.
Etchings. Emerson.
Engravings. Hallet & Davis.
Artists' Supplies. Kimball.
Mouldings. Pianos & Organs.
Frames. Sheet Music.
1513 Douglas Street , Omaha , Nebraska.
A wrong corset tortures or
worries a woman worse than
anything else she has on , or
can put on , unless it be a
wrong shoe.
There is a right corset , a
ready-made corset , right for
almost every woman one.
There is only one of which
the seller will say "Bring it
back in a week , or two , or
three , and get your money for
it , if you are willing to part
with it ; " and that one is
Ball's.
There's a primer on Cor
sets for you at the store.
Cnioico Consrr Co. , Cfclcoeo and New Yort ,
imi > m , liitjrclM , BtfvtiM indd'rU' ' trirr * *
Ji 0i * ( , r nior tt h'ilt * tt t > rir * irul
'L1 0 , n. . dirtft , . fro * L 0 k r t r' .
1 lor > Mt.iion , s , CLf.r , . Wl4
110U b D4Xc. it < capfor nw c t *
U > III i IB li
PRINTERS' INK ;
A JOUKKAL FOR ADVERTISERS.
Ii lntl vcslly , il Ii tie tere9enUtlT Journal
tie traia j enroll ef Aaeriiaa tfr tlitn. It
kllcitti to thl htiicieci ilvettlier hov , when ,
ui vlero houll > dTcrto ! ; b ? (3 ( vilti as
ftlT < rtl : at3t ; hjTtj dliphy cao ; vbt nsrijipori
to cio ; LOT ncl. n C7 to eifcl-U iiHi \ -
ejiriti oa crtrj jclit tint tiaiti of prsitiMs
dliuin. ! Alrcrtljbs Ii aa rt prutlisi t ; BKJ
tut usitrit ; : ! tr ' " Tbo eiutrj cf IBI1IT-
123' IHE uiertui It , tal their lirlco U tuel
ea is erpetlcncj of nro thia tTctr-iio yeiu la
jtj ! ! tlrcrtti ! : ; : ctnti fr n 7 o ! the Urg :
til sit scful liTjrtiisn , A 7i > t'i tatirlp
tlsa etiti tut ITQ dslUra ; iia > l ) eej ! free.
CEO. P. ROWELL & CO. ,
Neinpaper Advertising Uurcaa ,
i Spruca St. , Kcw
I'uclftt C'fyur C U8 1'ito tu Smohtn of
toaw
THbi KIKTIt A.VKNUU
LvtNlIN STORM.
Kvory particular liomokeiiper wants nlov
llnon , she iinint mid \ \ 111 have II.
Wo nro prepared to send ttamplc * to th
Indies of Omaha , from wlilolt they cult mik
IholrsnloelloiH.
Wo deal exclusively In Mnons , find carry
duly the rliolensi Importations direct from
the nmnnfneturur. You save the mlddlnprollt.
Purylmaer-t liuvii tint liemillt of IIKMAIIII.ITV oi
itooUs , nnil the lowest prices eoiiHlstent with
high quality.Vrlto us for Information
\VM. S. K1NSEY & CO. ,
The I'lflh AviMiTto Mncti Store.
088 Fifth Avenue , - Now York
Near Newport , n. I.
OpotiHVoilnoHilnjj limo CIO.
A ilclliihtful ntinimor hemn for fntiillli" , Ampin
eroun.H. nlnrnyn cool , porfort ilrnlmiuo line wutur.
Hun Tli'vrn , IxmtliiR nnil il'hlni ; AiMrc" Mil llronii
ft. I'roTlilonci1 , It 1 Alter .lunovu , llotol
cut , Newport , It I O. 1 * Hl.UU'r. Mnrmitor
PRINCIPAL POINTS
EAST , WEST ,
NORTH and'SOUTH
13O2 Pnrnam Stroot.
HARRY P. DEUEL
Olty Passouffor txud Ticket Agent ,
A Wrlllcn Guarantee la
CUKE EVERY CASE or
MONEY REFUNDED.
Otir euro Is permanent
nml nut ft i > AU-niitf ! up.
( Viipfl tti'TtiMlHojiarrt nno
limo nocr pfcn tV pmi > ti > m
Mncp. Jly lieteilbintf onto
fully MO inn ticnt > ou by
mill , niul uo prlro tlio pitno
Alrnntr uunmnteo io euro or
irCum ! nil money. Tlmvi
* 1 > prefer to como hero for
treatment can tlu mi nml MO
uill imy rnlho.'ul faro both
2 Hnjunmlhotrl M1M whllo
IK ro If w o full to cum. Wo
ClmllrnKO tlmWorlii fora
civtntlintam-MAOlU KKM
El ) V it 111 not euro. Wilto
for full particular * nml Ktt
tliocvidcncc.YnknowtItat
| T1 jou nro fcLuptUal , justly no
too , nn the most eminent
pliynlrlAiu hnro nercr born
AMolofflroinorulhnn tun *
pornry ixllcf. In uur Iho
jcniw' itrullrn with tlilJ
MAC11O HKMKDY It li-w
been moi > t ( link'ult to oxer-
toinnthopieJuilIcoBnciiiifit
nil to railed ppoctUr * . Hut
until r ourntroiiff jrunrnnteo
you r-houM not holtixto to
ttytliU remedy. You likc
no chaneo of lonltiir > our
.
frnt pMll/onf , th , a at „ „ , , , „ | irolwtp „ . , „ , . , , , „ .
anUi gain } matin around rnl ) intf , | | o ( (300.000,16
< * ' ? . HiuTfii-tlyinfiMo nil vliu
will try lti > tu'utincnt. Ilentu *
forujuiiluuo iKtn imllliiB up
mul IKI > nu ; out > our money fur
fUiri'ifiit tixntmtnts , mul nl
though J on ni-w not j ct c i eI nn
iino Ins | nlil Imclouurinoury
Do not wmli ) any inoio niuncy
unCIl > ou tiym. OMrliioiuv ,
iet6ratril ! | rntoiiriirtvl In 30 tu
OOtlnya. InvoKtltcnti ) our tluin.
clal Mantling uurioputntlun nil
Imftlnotfa turn. Wrltn u * fur
jmmoHnnilaiMrowRCflof tliosn wu
lia > o cui-ftl w ho lmu KVI ! > II per-
mlii'loii ( o refer to them. U
cosU jou only poatni.'ii to ilu
thl1 * ! It 111 * aM ) ) uu a woilil of
miftYrlng from mental itrnln. mul If you nro mnirlnl
what may 3 our oft i > rlnR suiror throuRli your until-
icucol If 3 our nyiiiptuiusnro iioro throat , muiou | i ltli.
05 In mouth , ] hfimmtism In bones anil Joints , hair fall-
Inpr out , eruptlond on any part of the body , foellnic of
Rcneial ileprt nlon , pilns in he.id or honcff. 3011 liuvo
no Uini ) to watte. 7hoia who nro constantly InklnirmiT.
cuiy ami ] u > tu.h rhouhl discontinue It. Uunxlnnt m.
of thcjo ill tigs will cut ely In Inir tot en In the mil. Don't
fall to wnlte. All coiie pontlcnco font wilM In vlnltt
envelope * . Wo Infill ) the most iltflil Investigation ancP
will do all In our nowir t nld 3011 In It.iUlri" < i ,
COOK KKMlinr CO. , Oinnlin , A
13th and Dodge Streets.
MANHOOD RESTORED.
" 8ANATIVO , " the
AViiiuloi fill Hnnnlbli
Itcmi'dy , In Bold with
n IVrlttnii Gimran-
tco to cnro nllNi'n-
nim DUiMiuce.Biich nn
Weak Memory , Io s
of Ilruln Power , Ik'ud-
nclie , Wnkufnlncpp ,
Lout JIiuiliooil , Ncry
„ . _ , oimicpH , I.nBsltuilc ,
nil drains mid IOHB of power of the UoncriuHu Or
gniinln eilhor eux , ciiufcd by ovcr-cxurtlon , youtb-
till IndlecrUtoiii , or the cxcefelvo HXO of touncco ,
opium , or Btlmtiliuilu , which ultlinntcly Iciid to
Infirmity , Consumption nnil Innaiilty. rut up In
convenient form to carry In the vest poclicl. I'rico
Si n jwcknse , or 0 Im 85. With every $5 order wo
Clvo atrrKfon uiuirntitra In cure or rrfunu
Ilia mom'/ , bent liy mull to any mlilrcBU. Clr-
cnlnr free. Mention thla tmpcr. Ailclruns
MADRID CHEMICAL CO. UrnnchOfflcoforU.S.A
417 lli'iii i"in btrrct , ( M I'AO ( ! , ILL.
roit SAM : IN OMAHA. KKII. , IIY
ICuhn H To. , Cor. Uith nnil Douclnii Htrocts.
J A. I'lilliT ACo. . Cor lltli A DoiiKlni Btreoti , ant
A I ) . Koatur X Co Conucll lllulls , Iowa.
X.IQUOR HABIT.
IN ALL THE WOKLU THERE IS BUT ONE CURE
DR. MINES' GOLDEN SPECIFIC.
It can lie cclvcn In u eiiu uf cuirio nr tea. or In ar.
llflc. of food , without tha kuowlixlRo of tlio patient ,
If necouary. It la abioluioly harmless and will ulucl
a permanent and apcedy eurn , whcthur the pallfnt la
n uiodnruta drinker or an alooliollo wreck. IT N K\ Kit
KA11.S. It operaiuti .o qulolly and with nuca eer
talnty that the patlont uuderuooa no Inoonvonloiicu ,
oud ere ha la awarn , hU oouiploto reformation la
eflcotod , 4Spaeabookofpartloularafroe Tohohadol
KUHN ! t CO..1IMH & Uougluia.Xc lllhfi CumlnnHla.
0 / ' Trade auppllod by llbAKK. UHUUil 4 : UO , and
ItlCUAUUUON Illlua CO. , Oman * .
JOSEPH GILLOTT'S '
STEEL PENS.
GOLD MEDAL , PARI3 CXPOSITION , 1880.
THE MOST PERFECT OF PENS.
" ( For tOBTorFAIUHO 1
. 1DtBilif Yi
W.aknestof Body ndMind , EtfitU
ofErroriorExcsiMsinOldorYounjr ,
1I1OOII rollMtilortd. . llmf Io ( Blini * kuft
Jb.oluUImftllUr IIU3H THKiTIIKKT-IKiieii U U.f.
BtulHllrf freia CO AUUltud ttr l BCoQ lrlM. I7rlllhtpl.
' 'I. * llnot , vipUailUa kail proorinftllfdi ( ft ) difrc
ERIC MHOIOAb OO.i OUFfALO , N. YT
BuiTrrlng from tlio elf ucu of lontlifulcrrora , rnrlr
dccny , WMtlnif wraknpaa , Ion manhood , tto , I will
nd a valuable treullw ( ' ali ll fontalnliu full
rartlrulari for homo cur , I'lllIK of rhiirKO. A
plondld modlral work hould l n > ad by i-Tery
111. in who U nurvnui nnd ddillllatod , Aililicw ,
t'rof. I' . < ' . I'OU'IiICItt JtlooUui.C'oim.
iuics OM v l > r l-eduo , * I'crlodlial I'm *
tlio Frintch ruiniMlr not on the inumtrunl ajmtnni and
euro upiru | lun frum wliaiovtir cuiuu 1'romoto
inontlruullun Tliuio pllli nhuuld nut bo taken due
Inu prujfimncr Am rill Co , llornltjr l'ror > < , Hpun-
CLT Clay Co In ( junulno by Uliurruun Id MU'oniuill ,
Dudi.'o lit , HL-ir I' U , Oumli.i C A .Mulclicr HoutU
( Jiunlm.ll r. inila , Council HlulTi U , orarurli.
MI VTu Irarel for tlio rontlilll Nuncrlcto ,
JtLl i.1 I'anadn Wo jmr V ) ID IIUI n month uiUJ
ttlprnaoito uKonti , to null our ( Jniittdlan Kru li tu M
AdiUtl * b U.StWLLLliitilu.N iludlJUUVl *