10 THE OMAHA DAILY BEE : SUNDitfy , JANUARY 12. 1800. SIXTEEN PAGES 1 W STORIES OF THE DIPLOMATS H Who and What They Are and now H They Look K' MINISTER DOUGLAS AND HAYTI mi Iho Islanders Fcnr AnticiAtlon nn < l pi Dislike Our Hoprcsontntlvo V Asked After Grandma M Alctorln " H | Gohftlp About the Diplomats E { Covyi IgMtit 1800 by Vrwil O. Carnt | r. ) HL - I aMiJSOtom , Jan H I 1 A / " ' iSpecial to H A kj/\J teijee-i-tii | ° M'ffi \ m V two aouitorB H / " A ff Wljl from Montana H Irmrnl ,1 i whom a tc H 'ff ' itfe'y publican * h si vo H MUiM lC Ml , cltcted ara as H J ' different ns the H C r rnrwJCTWr Iolcs They have H ffjPlWlMnWlM mPw lmnly , Bn attrl * B rJolJlljLll A A JiftJY'f ' ' ) Ul0 'n ' comulon I T SWi ? - ) • " ' , l nml accordln&t0 H i ; viiii"M | - Montana men H ono Is nsjgrcat as Uio other is small T.lo | i big man Is Sanders anil the llvtlo mnn U is Powers Sanders is tall , angular , black U eyed and lilack-l.alrcd. Ho reminds ono M of Abraham Lincoln and ho has as much M magnetism nsJamcsG Hlnlne Ho is a great U orator nnd tioholds hisnudicuco in the hollow U of his hand llvo minutes after ho nns tlrst M I opened his mouth He oxcolls especially in M u the vlndictivo and ho has a poison tafj at the M A end of his tongue equalizes into that which M , j mippllcs the vitriol which spurts forth from T the mouth of John J. IngnllB Ho is well up B I in Cnglish literature , quote * from pouts ns L though ho had been raised with J ! them nnd Is ono of the great lawyers of the If northwest For the monty odd years dur- J ; which ho has lived in Montana ho bus been a HH noted man nnd ho has done mora to crystal HI [ ie civilization in the croat northwest than HI ; . . any other Montana citizen He settled first J | t' ' nt a little mining camp and moved from By there to Virginia City Ho was practising HI" ' nw in this mining sottlctncnt during the Hj ; stormlust days of Montana , when every man L carried his lifo in his hand , and the road | | agents ruled the territory The sheriff bo- HB ; l longed to a band of robbers and road nircnts HH ' nnd justice was unknown until ono day Sao J ' i dcrs called the miners together , denounced i the robbers nnd organized a vigilnnco cmn- BH ' mitten nnd a set of mining courts He ' pushed this organization so that ho was Hi ; eventually able to clean the robbers out of If | the country , and this was not done before IH there wcro a number of hangings and not a V few bloody shooting affrays 'i Senator Sauuers mauo money in Virginia Ik City at the law Ho mads moro nt < I. Helena and now nt the ugo of lifty-six ho is ' worth about i20l(00. ) ( ho was born in New ' York and married his wife In Ohio wheio ho His was admitted to the bar Mrs Sanders is n fli ' . very bright woman She is widely traveled , HH : cultured and dignitlcd , and she will I am HH > " told , lie ono of the leading figures of Wash Hbs ington Boeicty She Is now presiding with HHt grace over ttio line residence of Senator HH' banders in Helena , and Htio is very proud nt HH ? ' her tinco grown up sons , the youngest of HH' whom has lust graduated from Exeter col- HH ; lege HH/ SKSATon roi\iit ad ins $ $0,000 piluc , H $ Senator Power is a tnllu elder thau Sun HH ders Ho is a little , rapid , nervous business HH | man who started life as an Indian trader up HHj | the Missouri river many years ago , nnd who HHn has been ongacod over since then in trading HH > with the Indians , the whites and the gov- HHr crnment , and has madoitpay ' He is worth HHc tnreo or four hundred thousand dollars , nnd HH | has a big agricultural implement , establish * HHI ment ut Helena with branch establishments HH.l Throughout the territory Hu Is building ono HHk \ of the llncst bouses in the northwest It is HHk j on immense marble structure trimmed with HHjj I granite and red sandstone , nnd it is to cost HI | ' $80,000. 1 ho red sandstone trimmiiiES ura HHI exquisitely carved , and it will tuko allot HHI next year to finish them The house con * HH | tains about twenty-live rooms , nnd it con HH ! nists of two stories , a basement and an attic HH li About six years ago Senator Power got the H political bee in his bonnet Why it attach oil HH \ him no ono knows , for ho is no spcukor and HH ; has heretofore had no political con HH ' iicctions Ho became a candlaato HH | , for congress , and was later on HH > , defeated by Governor Toolo hi the cam HH i I palpn for the governorship It was bis doteut HH hero Hint formed the chief teason for his HH | election to the sonatorshlp H HOW PUMl'KIXB AND KAI C1TTI.E Jt V1)U CAM1-- HH : ini.i : , aovuisoii ur omo | | James K. Cnmpboll will bo inaugurated HH ; governor of Ohio next week Ho owes his HH | positiou to his appreciation of pumpkins and HHj fat cattle It was tbls element ot his nature HHjj that made him successful in his lirst congrcs- HHp sional aainpuign and he thereby got'the HHi promlnciico that makes him today t'no HH ] greatest man in Ohio Campbell's opponent H during bis tlrst congressional campaign was HHI ox-Congressman Little , whom President HH | 1 Harrison unpointed this summer as a HH ( I member of the Venezuelan commission HH ? Little is a tall , sober aristocrat , HH ? who belongs to ono of the influential HHi i families of his county and who considers , H' himself far above the ordinary run of inor- ' HHr tula He had represented the dlstrictsin HHl congrcSs and bo had no doubt of bis ro-olec- HH | tion Ho did not mix much with the com HHS mou people , and toward the last oftho cam HH | palgn when ho and Campbell sDoko together HHi at u big agricultural fair ho made a scholarly HHi oration on the intricacies of the tariff while HHi Campbell devoted his talk to the glories ot HHi the agricultural show und oiled his tongue on HHI tno fatness of the cattle and spoku glowing HH ! words on thu ricti yellow gouion buo of Hi Grccno county pumpkins After the HH'i spceches-woroovor Campuoll went around HHI the fair grounds and snook bauds with the HHI farmers Ho tallied with Farmer Simplclns HHjj about his winter wheat nnd praised Mrs HHf Jones yellow butter Ho chucked the coun- HHl , try maidens undorthoir chins , - kissed nil the HHi babies without regard to sex , and Hi shook hands with old nnd young HHl alike Mr Little strutted about HHi the grand stand and received the HH ; J congratulations of his friends upon his li.io H' ieffort , nnd when his friends bogged him to HH > i como out In the evening nnd help ttio crowd HH' ' , llrc oil rockets nutl uumploCincinnati lager HH' ihe gravely remarked : "i'liut the ucoplo HH | must have their snorts but that they would HH > ctijov them moro if gentlemen did not miu- { > glo with thorn " He was not to bo rooted HH ] from his hotel parlors and the ring politi- HHi clans ot his party swore roundlv as they saw HH ! Farmer Campbell doing his political mix HHl lug , This same kind of a campalgu was HHf managed by Cnmpboll throughout thu whole HHf district and the result of the vote was u i HHf ( greater surprise than that which came after HH-i the election of pious Dick llishop i HH some years ago Ulshon was i HH ' the greatest mixer Ohio had I Hi over linowu but Campbell is his equal Iio i HHl was elected to congress and the change In i HH the vote about the ogrlculturo fair Bhowcd I HH Ohlo'pumpkins bunt patriotism auy day HH1 * in the wek Hi 101Y | -MlNI9TiilHXCBTOX LBIIINKI ) fllENCII ' H < i'ho Hon Prod Douglass , accordlngtosomo i HH ] authorities , seems to be having a hard time i HHi la Hayti and bo would make a much hotter HHj minister if ho bad u thorough knowledga of H the French lauguago The Haytians speak j HHl French and this is the diplomatic tongue of i Hi the cobrt Kx-Mlnistor Langston told mo ' HHj the other day of bis difficulties in this regard I HH ; at the beginning of his mission and how ho 1 H ilmitly ' Bunuouuted them Said ho : HH i I had a young white man as my secretary , ' HH who was u comuleto master of both Spanish H and French , and I supposed that i would bo HH' ' nblo.to got along through him ; At the tlrst HH < meeting of the diplomats a case vary Impor- H taut to the United States was presented It HH , was given iu thn Spanish language , and the H discussion upon it bad to bo conducted in H French 1 could not utter a word In cither \ H language , mid I rcmemborcd with regret an 1 H opportunity which Cbarlos Sumner had offered - forod xne but which Iliad refused Ho had i H told mo that I would some day probably be i H cajled upon to take a forolgu mission , and I H that I ought to known French It you care > H to try I will teach you , ho said . H 1 was , however , busy nt the tlmo , and had HH no ideh that I would bo , seut abroad At J H this in&eting of the diplomats I saw that I H must master French or I could 1 H Ml do ofllclent service , I was tuttod for ray opinion and I said in English that the case was very im portant to my government and thnt I would llko to have until 10 o'clock the next day to putmv opinion In writing I was given the Spanish papers and I took them homo nnd had my secretary rend thom over to mo I wrotomy opinion In Lngllsh and my secre tary translated it Into French and 1 gnvo It to the BMcmbly Thnt day , however , I decided - cidod that if I could not master French in six months I would throw up my mission I told my secretary so and ho beenmo my teacher From then 1 ate , drank , slept and thought ot nothing but French I studied all the tlmo nnd practiced on every man , woman and child I mot There was no laborer or beggar so low Upon the street that 1 didn't Hon Jour , monsieur , " to him nnd there was no woman so ragged that 1 did not accost her with a French phrase longer or Bhorter as I was able to mnko It , The result was that 1 hud n good hold on the langungoboforo mv six months wcro up , and upon the death of the French envoy aLHajtl during the latter part of Ibis tlmo I dcllvored an eulogy upon mm , My eulogy was published In the newspapers , and It uas copied In to/the Journnti of Paris and com plimented by them , " Wlir MINISTEII IIUt'dMSS H tMl'OPUl.Ut IN iiaiti I asked I-rol. Langston ns to the objec tions of the Haytians to Minister Douglass on account ot his color Ho said : "I dent think there ctn ( bo any objection raised to him on that ground , nor on the ground ot hi * having a white wife Not a few of the most noted people of the Island are blacks who luvo white wives , nnd this was the case of the Into Prosldcnt Salomon I once heard Salomon mnko a Bpoech defending himself ngnlnst the charge that ho was opposed to themulattoes He said ; "I am n bluck man myself nnd my wire Is a whitu French womnn and inV vieo president Is a Haylian as white ns any Cau casian I challenge nnybody to say that I have any feeling against any ono on account of his color " "I dent Know that Minister Douglass is unpopular In Hayti , " continued Minister Langston , but it ho is so It is because thn llnytlnns nro very jealous in regard to the annexation or sale of an } part of their Island to the United States nnd they mny nssoclato Douglass with such schemes Ho was sent to Santo Domingo witn Hen Wndo and other American statesmen to report as to ttio nd- vlsaoiltty of Us annexation Ho now goes back to the country on u war vessel and his secretary , Mr llassott , was , ns consul at Now York , in the pay of the party which is now out Of power in Hayti it may bo that the Haitians fear Douglass I do not know now Tin : utjsnxs aui : sTKM.rxo uiunv HcarAdmiral Shufeldt , who bus Just re turned from Jnn.in , in speaking of the pos sibility of Kussia objecting to the Cbincso gaining contiol of Corea , tolls the followirg story aa to how the Kussians have boon out wilting the Mongolians as to the boundary between Siberia and China The means of communication nro so poor in China , nnd thu avenues of news are so few , " sal s Admiral Shufeldt , that it Is im possible for the Chinese to keep track of the goings on in their provinces The liussinns have been steadily inching on the Chinese Every year they will send n regiment of Cos sacks with tneir families about ton to fifteen miles into China This regiment will settle down , take up the land and cultivuto IU They take up the boundary stones as they settle down and put thorn at the edge of their settlements , ana thu next year another regiment comes along , takes up the lnnd below and moves the boundary stones furtheron towards Poking Thi-so encroach ments have been going on for years and the Chinese cannot understand the poructual shrinkage of their northern frontier ANOTHER DIPLOMATIC ElISOIin 1 heard from a diplomat at Peking how the last treaty was made betaeen Itussiu and China At the treaty conference the Rus sians brought forth n map nearly as big as a library tabjo and upon this was a big led line which marked the boundary between Siberia and China This line gave the Rus sians a vast amount of new territory and the Chinese , ns they looked at the uig mup.ttirmv up thuir hands in holv horror and said that though they wcro willing to give away some of their lands they could not ttinkof allow * ing such a vast slice of territory to go They wcro anxious to make a treaty but they could not give away a fifth of their empire • 'AH right , " said the Russian diplomats , ' all right , wo will mauo a now proposi tion , " and with that they brought a now map of about the size of a sheet of note pa per , but upon which the red line marking the boundary was on the very same latitude as on thu library table map "Oh , that is all right , " said the Chinese , That is moro reasonable , and wo will give you thut much rather than fight " AMERICAN nil'IOUATI IS CIIINl Some of the diplomats whom the United States have sent to China have been rare birds I heard all scrts of stories about them during my visit to tbo country last jear Ono of our consuls at Ningpo , south of Shanghl , was present ut a dinner given by the English consuL to the two ons ot the princa of Wales , who stopped there on their way around the world The American consul shook hauds with the young princes nnd throw his arm around one of tholr shoulders as ho said : Wall boys , so you arc the sons of Whales I am mighlv glad to see you ; und how did you leave your grandma , Victoria I I hope she is feeling well nnd I want you to take my regards to yon when yon go back " Another consul In the interior of China was represented to bo in a chronic state of intoxication and the stories of General Mosoby and bis lack of a ureas suit are known to all Speaking of Fred Douglass and the charge that ho loses social prestige in Hayti by hav ing his wife do clerical work for him , recalls a story which Admiral Shufeldt lolls mo of ono of our consuls to Cuba nt tbo time ho war consul general at Havana This man , " said the admiral , drove the stags during the intervals of his consular work " Another of our ministers to a South Amer ican country brought his boh along with him and got him a place as a mechanic in the town when ) ho was locutod and he tried to got his daughter a place in thu public schools but ttio government to uhlch ho was sent refused to allow it Another minister prac ticed medicine at tiio same tlmo ho was act ing as minister , and not n few of our consuls in out-of-tho-way ports are engaged in busi ness iiistsTEit rAi/UEn's ajiiiitio : ; . It has boon reported that Thomas . Pal mer , our minister to Spain , will probably resign - sign his mission in July , but his reason for doing so baB not been given I am told by a Micbicau congressman that ho proposes to make n campaign for the governor ship of Michigan Said ho : Senator Palmer would like to have bis uamo go down into history ns the first native gov ernor of his state , lie prides himself on his Michigan birth and ho owns thu same land now which his grandfather took out not long after the end of the involution , Palmer made his first reputation as n speaker as a ciuididato for the governorship This was a number nt yours ago There wcro four gub ernatorial candidates and among them wcro Slockbridgo , now In tbo United Spates nor ate , Thomas W. Palmer and Gov Jerome The contest iu the convention was very cloao but Jerome was finally nominated , The defeated candidates then had to go to the platform and muku speeches supporting the nomination Palmer made the best speech ot the trio Ho said It was hardly fair to ask u man to Bpcak at his own funeral , but that his situation was the samu today as was that of liouapirto'a soldier , who , wounded well nigh unto death , had'fallon in the ranks and hud boon loft by the roadside on that fnmons retreat from Moscow Ho lay dying , and as Napoleon rode by ho raised bis bead and shouted , Viva Ioinpereur ' It is the same with mo , " said Senator Palmer , "I have fought bard ; Tarn wounded nlgn unto death , but as long as I exist I will shout Vivo la republican party and long live our candidate , Mr Jerome ' The speech was In fact , an eloquent ono It was copied throughout the state and extracts - tracts from it found a plaoo In many of the leading uowspupers of the country It put Palmer to tno front ns one of the great speakers ot Michigan , und It had something to do with making Ulm senator a few years later At the time of his election to the Bonuto , ex-Senator Ferry und Jay Hubbell wore candidates , The contest was close and Palmer came In as a compromise Fiu.mj G. Caiuentbii • Imported digestion and assimilation produce dlsordorcd conditions ol the syatoni whiah crow and nro confirmed by neglect Dr J. U. JicLeiin'a Btronethenliiff Cordial nhd Blood l'uri- flor , by its tonio properties , cures Indi- ffcstloii and gives tone to the Btoruttcb $1 nor bottle , THOUGHTS ' IN LIGHTER VEIN , Walfa From the World of Wit and Humor SINGING SONGS OF LA GRIPPE A KeprcfHcr of Kolcmlllo Informa tion The Umpire Wanted a Con genial Situation Allowoil Tlmo to Ilnvo Ills Kits CnrninrkN of lit < rlppo A'eip YuYk Tttlmne If you have bigness of the head , A cough and ringing ears , " A hot nnd feverish cuticle , , And eves suffused with tears , A bilious feeling bout your waist , . And aching legs and hip , Though far from well you are not sick You Imvo not lost jour grip , " If , vou have running at the nose , And constant ( Its of sneezing , A chilly fooling down your back As though your splno was freezing If In a nervous , rocky state , Llko one In drunkoo frenzv , My friend , yon'vo got the French "La Gripno" Or English lniluons\i. Harmonlousi Iiilinrinuiiinusnrse To.mis Siftinps : JIo Dr Pulpit surpassed himself totluv Grand ideas nml beautifully clothed beautifully clothed " She ( uroubod from profound medita tion ) What did yon bay , dear ? O , yes to bo sure Dr Pulpits clothes Ho does dress wcil olcgunlly Hut 1 wns just thinking whttl ii dowdy his wife looked Really , she u displace to tbo church , " . * DNcixirimtnir n Mimur Terre Haute Express : When a woman has boon out in the ruin , nnrtucold rain nt that , until she litis * jroUen "bedrn } , ' - gled , " a man of practical tense will lot her alone Ono old gentleman learned this fact yesterday Did you over rolloot . madam , " said ho to a woman who was standing under tin awning alongside of him waiting for the next cur did vou over collect on the fuel that the atmosphere exerts , : i pressure of fifteen pounds to the square inch ? And yet how often do wo boar the expression , light as uir' ' "I dent heliovo u word of _ it ! " alio snapped , in a , tone thnttoald hnvo warned any married in-u to drop the subject at once But , mntinin " l'I don 't beliote it wort ! of it , I toll j you If there was any truth in it , that old empty slcull of yours would have been cuvcTd in long ago " And u few minutes later an old gen tlonian might have been seen unndoring down street in tlio pouring rain , auto matically holding in n m-rpendiuiilur position : in umbrella , he had forgotten to open Manti'il hxi-lteii'PtiT. Merchant Tnueler : The footstep ' that took him through the door of the omploj ment agency was halting und weary What do you want'ashed the cleric behind the desl ; . "Do you know anybody who wants a man to ' ell boohs or sewing machines ? " asked thu tired-looking man No not at present ? " " Does anybody want to hire a work man in a. powder mill , or something of that sort ? " ' , Not thatJkiio\v _ of " , , , , j ' But you know of a shpwfthut wants a-man to bo liied ; out of a caution ? " "No , but.you seem to bo the victim of an exceedingly reckless mood today " Reckless ? O , no IsiHJhttho sum mer umpiring baseball games , nnd I wanted some winter ocoupatioii' ' thut would sort of keep mo interested " A Millinnnire in u Pitiable Condition San Francisco Chonlcle : The men 1 pity most nt New Years time tire the millionaires They balance their books and lind that they hnvo not made anything ilKu as much us they would like to have made , however much they have made I don 't know , because my business does not take mo much into the haunts of the millionaires , but I judge 1884 has not boon a good year for tliuui The other diy si friend of initio went in to see u well-known mil estate owner of other peoples real estate as well as his own Ho found him feeated at his desk with his bunk book before him , in a brown study He looked pale , and haggard , and ill "What's the mutter ? You dent look well " ' " Dent I ? Do I look bad ? " Yes ; you look bud " ' Well , I guess you'd look bud too , if vou had $ -5,000,000 lying idle in the bank , not drawing a cent of inter est " Not Hocked ( or 1'iino Sne ' iit Tn Kit * . Pittsburg Dispatch : A gang of men were at work on a city street when a slight , beardless youth laid down his pick , and , approaching the foremansaid to him : Can I take a lit , sir ? " Take what ? " nskod the foreman "A lit I leel ono coming on , " replied the youug man , without emotion Why , rortainly , " t > aid the foreman , So the young man walked over to a bit of grass under a leafy tn'o it was anew now btrcot in thu suburbs and had ullt ullt.Then Then he wont und washed , h's face , came back to his place In the line , took up his picknnd struck into ivork After the days work was over tho.young man said to the foreman : You dent ' mind iny having lits ? " "No , I guess not , if you do a fair days work " Well , you see , I used to work for a butcher , an' ho wouldn't lot mo take llts said it interforrod with business an'I thought you might fool the same way about it " And that young man works hard with pick and shovel and takes a tit once in a while , as jou or I might take a drlnlc of water The Irony of ' 1 ratio Igrottirticc , .Towolcr's Weolcly : Jeweler ( in cus tody ) : Your Honor , the olllcor tolls me I nm under arrest for a violation of the election lawe 1 would llko to know the particulars of the ohurgo " Judge : The evidence , . sir , is your own confession Hero is a popy ot a dodger in which you announce thut you have supplied ropeutorts to several well known politicians " t _ _ i AiinlhoinnH on the Grip Pttttliurv ChronMC'Tcltamph , A racking pain runs thro' my bralu , As though mv skull would rend , sir 1 snoero I cboko my back Is broke Can this bo influenza ) My eyes are red I'm ' nearly deadj 1 wish this cold would menu , sir With each fresh broeiro I madly suoezo O , cursed influenza ! 'Twas Russia's czar who from afar This curse to lis did send , air ; And on "La Gripno" our tongues do slip , Hut stick on influenza Helped to Kill Up- Tlmo : Hero is an articlethat , was i handed rae down in the drug store , " i euld the repot ter , aa ho gave the editor of the Kansus daily an oblong object • wrapped hr a uowsnaper "I thought 1 umybp ypu might wish to use it " "Yeb , ' ' was the reply , as from the l " depths of tKo fiicUnge the editor removed - moved a cork ana allowed somothinjr to trickle down his throat , the nrtlclo is very appropriate and I think wo will run it on thoijsiao | this afternoon " HII l\Virti'H OJTIOP Hartford Post : "Ah , Fits'roy , I'm clad to see you , ' " Bald nn earnest re former "I tcnitt to know if you would have any objection to your wife running for school committeeman on the same ticket with mlnp ? " Well , I think I should My wife holds ono oftico alfcatYv That's enough " What oml'6' ' , rl should like to know ? " "Slio's " tin usuessor "An assessor ? " Yes She assessed mo this morning $ .14.7i for a Winter bonnet , nnd there are more assessments in sight " II Wns in llio Slonvoo Morclmnt Trnvolor "I hvnhi you wus in or little gniuo ob poktih ins night ? " "Yus , sah " "An'tint Sam Jenkins won ' nil do money in do aggregation , cz usual ? " Yes " Sam Jenkins is or mighty lucky man " "So ho is " "Mobbo bo's got it mascot " Hits 'is coat " "Dnt coat got do luckyist pah ob sleeves I obnh laid my oyis on " How Hip homli It Wale I tie Up Evan P. Howell of the Atlanta Con stitution tolls a story to show how the south is waking up industrially A farmer friend of his was in the Consti tution olllco , ho says , and Howell asked him how his beo-guma were getting along Pretty well , " the friend an swered The bees work pretty hard all day , and lay up a lioap of honey But I think they might do a little bet ter .My mind is running on crossing them witli lightning bugs , so that they can work a little at night " niHio Wns Olilielii' ' . Buffalo Courier : Her parents think Elsie the cutest child in the world , and cortallily for a tlvo-yotir-old this fairy is wonderfully handy about the house Slio has n natural ambition to bo help ful , however , much in the way she may happen to get iu her laudable but natur ally not yet very directive desire to mnko herself useful The other day her father had a gentleman friend for dinner , and after the repast told the little girl to fetch a couple of cigars from his bos "Dm you find thom , Elsie ? " lie asked , as she returned Yes , pap.i , ahtl I bit the ends off for you " _ _ _ _ _ CruRir l ut Sensible Milwaukee Wisconsin : A crusty old West Hider was informed by his daugh ter the other day that a eort.iin gludy girl of her acquaintance was about to bo ' married "Ilasi the young man any money ? " ' dctiuiiidcd the old man The ( laughter cowff Med that ho diu uothavo wealth Well 1 do you imagine ho-hiis any traces of"raln b ? " Why 1 sup uose so , why b jou ask ? " "HecitUoo if ho hasn't therp-yron't be any brains in the fnmilj , Unit all " Wliva Ihoiniit 1j.iutIi . Philadelphia Inquirer : The funniest thing in the Career of the carousing cat is when hi * silts on the back fence placidly watfihiHg a woman trying to conic within several miles of him with a job lot of brii'ia-brae. Mij > li < > u. to t'tii" . JJtiiHSm Trllunrtg ) Mine eyes have seen-the coining of the wp- , rlallUUSSUUl UKttV' 1 .W' v. * * It is going througa lho.countr.sion a kind of Hyingtnpit It is seizing all the people Just above the up per dip , i / c. And it still goeR > sueozlngon rr i Whv ll-rn I Orpins VnnlHli New YorkAVeeklv : Philanthropist Yours is' the first hand organ I have seen for'somo iWeoks Got too cold for them , Isuppose Organist IJetoes so , sigrnor Zee people ple kecoa windows shut and notta pay us to morn on.f l'or ferml ( Jif Citron Harpers Weekly : "Vv icu cookies you rudder haf , meester do vwones init holes in do ( mqedle or do vwones mil citron in de meedlo ? " "Ay it dent jiuilik nhny difference to yeinem , Oi'll tnhk do ones wid do citron Oi ' m fonder av citron dan av holes , mem " Howare of fraudq Rod Cross Cough Drops wi'l cure your cold CO.NN UUt AIilXIlSS A West Virginia maiden of forty-nino summers is the plaintiff in a breach of prom ise suit . It may ba that love makes tbo world go round , but an overdose of whisky will do it more successfully The human race Is a great ono " Yes , " said the widow to whom he was engaged , "I am now on'tho second lap " A Litchfield , Mich , couule who liavo been married thirty years , bad n misunderstand ing about twoye.irs ago , snd Binco thou they have never spoken to each other , though living iu the same house At Portsmouth , O. , the weddlug of Uncle Aaron Noel , n Clay townshln farmer , aged eighty throe , to Mrs Lizzio Dawsona widow of Lucasvillo was stepped by tno grooms sou , A. N , Noel , ho taklag the mnrriago license from biui Thaa and wedlock wait for no man A Mauch Chunk juryman wus excused that ho mlgnt go and get married , the lawyers agreeing to continue their case before eleven good men and true " . Hobson Whorp are you bound ) Uomscn Up to osk mv pictty cousin to marry mo Hobson Well , good luck to you Hoinsen Thanks , dear boy Hobson ( an hour later ) Well , didyour pretty tousm say yesl Hem sen No , the homely thing refused me , Miss dumpktns is a very shnrp-spokon girl " said Dllfklns to ono of his friends Yes , It has stmtcki me so " "Do you think she is a womah iwbo would umbo homo hoppyl" "I couldu't'say an to thut , but I think you could count on her to make It Iq- toresllng " JyU O " said ono high-school girl to another , bow 1 do desplso that now Latin teacher of . " "Thufc&li-iooklug ours - young man who this " * Yes ' bo's horrid cuino yoari" , , and out ot school fie triesitj ) court mo I wish I could get oven with hltftjhotno way " Why dent ' you marry hlnvdfiarl" Landlady's 'dauphtor Mbthor , you tell that man In the ' front room to clour out at the end of thoinhfith Landlady Why so , my daugbterl ifiiq's a very nice gentleman , Landlady's danghjer Re is a fraud , I'vo boeu through lus.f uiik and found lots of let ters from a woiiidn to whom ho Is engaged to bo married , Whit sense Is tuero in wasting the nice front nib on that sort of a bd.irderi Wo want ono whoiisn't engaged Old Mr WlaoWer had been sitting silently alouo with Miss Autumn for liftoca minutes Finally ho spoVij Miss Autumn , you are pretty " Ob Mr , Widower 1" You are prot " How can you , Mr Widower ! " "I started to say that you were pretty " "Oh , you horrid man , atoul" Condemn It all , woman , " shouted Mr , Widower , rising and brealcing tor the door , "I wanted to say that you are pretty near as old as lam Now , domino , I think you'ro twice ns old , " * Cooks Jjxtra Dry Imperial Chniu- imirnr , The extraordinary success ot this wino is duo to tbo excellence of the article Estab lished SO years ago its proprietors have coti- stoutly endeavored to improve it It is sec end to no sparklug | wluu in the woild , as evldenco of this fact un extract from n letter of Lord Uhiof Justice Coleredgo of Knglaudi Send mo 15 dozen of your sparkling wino , I I tried It while jn your country and found it I a superior article " Thousands and thou I sands could be added if up.tco permitted THE CALLOWS AT FORT SMITH NIuo Indian Territory Mon Soon to Die Upon It TOOK A DROP WITH JACK KETCH Hcniinlsconocn ur the ntiicsntiio Old Mnelitno Execution by Shooting Among ; the Cliootnwa The Voting ttrnvo Kept IIli Word Tnlo ofn Gallows Tree luafi - . _ .3 out Smith , ArK , \y\ \ 1 1 1 Jun.U.-rSpecial er = Li 1111 t0 TIE , " * . ] - 1 a Nine moo Indian # * 91 territory murder / j nlr % ? ! ] raitS ] (9l ( ors wnoso d00" " i pJnSf Hj has been scaled , ill I" ! jRflitL "l0 ' 'icircerntcd ' f i ' - iiM.fiMWM / ' n th ° ulitei1 , 3jpnnnmnasj ! . < awaiting their ! lliVf ) oxeo11"011 ' # > rfp \ > / ( 'ftyi t Tt xJIb rilH * / , at hand , ilMiitiYvn 1 Af , ; | MiiiirWi whllo twentv-six moro nro yet to bo brought before the bar of Justice to nuswor for the sumo crime , 'llieso unfortunates nro Indians , negroes and white men burdened by lives ol lawlesuess nnd the evil companion * with whom they have long been uccustomed to associate , Sumo of tholn murdered for money , others for re venge ; and the history of thuir crimes is but a repetition of th.it of Hourly a hundred othei s that have been expiated en tba s una gallows fiom which these men are soon to take tboir fatal drop Perhaps no other structure since the bloody guillotine of the French revolution can boast of having sunt so many souls into eternity as the old gallows standing in n iiulot corner of the jail yard at Poit Smith This famous scaffold was erected fifteen years ngo , und slnco that tlmo sov- enty-two murderers have dropped through its fatal trap Its victims have been of nil classes and conditions of lifo and of various nationalities , nil for crimes committed in the Indian territory , or that portion of it over which the United States court for the west ern district of Arkansas has jurisdiction oni : or the "oimest" mkv that ever swung from this gallows and most of the unfortunates died game was Dr HcunStowart , a graduate of Yale col lege and ti man of extensive travel nnd much intormation Ho had been a ph.vslciuu on board an English merchantman aim had sailed the seas lor several years in that cipacltv , but coming back to America ho drifted into the Indian territory nnd falling among evil companions wandered into the paths of ci imp and paid tht , penalty on the gallows It Booms that Wiley Stewart , a cousin of Henri , who was then rosldlncln the Choctaw nation , had a grudge against an old doctor living nt Coddo aim hud deter mined to kill him Henri was ap prised of Wiley's intention and went along to sco the deed well done IJoth men were under the Influence of liquor , and all Indian Territory wliislcy belongs to the fighting kind They rode up to the rail road aepot ut Coddo while their victim , un suspicious of danger , stood on the p'utferm awaiting the train Henri Stewart draw Ins six-shooter and lircd into the ground , then Wiley regarding tliat as a signal to begin op erations , opened lire with a Winchester and soon brought down his old enuiny Wiley , who was ono of tlie most huidened charac ters in tbo territory , made Ills cscapo and was never npprehended , but Ilonri was ar rested for the orinio and was proven guilty of havnlg entered Into a conspiracy to com mit murder , and all efforts to save him were of no avail He nrotcstcd his mnocenco to ttio lust and made a short sneech on the gal lows warning his hearers against bad com pany and strong drink , then OU.MI.Y vssist a tukuaNomc to adjust the fatal noose about his neck , ho budo the crowd turcwcll und whs dropped into eternltv Colorado Uill was Stewart's companion on thu gallows He too died game , but his courage was moro of the dare devil , brnggudqcio kind and not the cool courage of resignation that Stownrt possessed Colorado Ullt had killed several men , but the crime for which ho forfeited his hie was thn murder of a youug man at Musbogee , with whom ho became involved in a difficulty on account of a fallen woman Two hundsomer men than Henri Stewart and Colorado Bill would bo hard to Und Both weio six feet tall and well proportioned tioned , but Stewurt's leaturcs showed cul ture and refinement , , while Hills ' were ruggeJ ahd coarse from the wild lifo of ex- nosure he hud led in the west Many other interesting cases have termin ated on this gallows , and the expert hung ' man who has dispatched over llftv of them can truly bpast of novcr having made nmis . Ho pi ides himself on breaking the neck of every man ha huugs , and says it is an act of humanity to carry out the sentence of the law and exact the penalty that stnrn justice demands , without causing auy unnecessary suffering to the unfor tunates whoso lives must be talion This export hangman has the knot welt uu dor the chin and then draws it as tightly as possible without choking When the trap is sprung nnd the deadly drop nnd dull thud scone is enacted , the hangman's knot Is drawn Just bohliul the ear anil the nock Is iistlt : asm ) ErrBCTUit.l.t linokRV nnd the victim is wafted into a realm ot dreams end Into ctormty The Indian territory with Its peculiar forms of government has long been n harbinger for criminals from all parts of the Ltilted States , and as there are no moans of extraditing them they nro safer from molestation there than In Canada or anvothor foreign country , for no requisition Is Issued nmt nouo is hon ored In the Indian territory Association with this lawless element has lind a demor alizing effect on the natives of the territory , many of whom are half.breeds.qiiartcr.broeds and ncgroos It scorns characteristic of these mixed races to exhibit all ot the evil proclivities of both the white tnati and the Indl-in , without the good qualities of cither The multltuao ot criminals who are aa > nually brought before the bar of Justice for murders ami robborlcs committed In the In dian territory nro mostly of the mixed breeds , nnd of the fi.OOU mon Indicted in the United States court nt Fort Smith within the past fifteen years for felonies committed In the Indian territory , loss lhan n thousand were full bloods The rest were or ttio mixed breeds , or were whlto men and ne groes who had bocoiuo adopted cltizons of the territory Many of them wore fugitives from Justice fem the states , who found a refuge m the wilds of the oxi.v iiisot.fTtit.v sircitirr within the biond domains of the American contlnunt The cases tried In the Untied States courts are only those whoruin a while man or a negro is concerned , nit oases where only citi zens ot any of the Indian nations uro In volved , ocino before the Indian courts for trial , if they are over tried nt till Thu Chnctaws execute by shooting I once attended a Choctaw execution near Sans Uois that hud much of the horrlblo connected with it The victim was a cripple , and unlike most Indians w.iswoak and with out stoicism Ho was the only Indian man 1 ever saw shed tears The execution tool place ono dreary December day out In thu woods not far from a rude structure that served ns a court house The condemned minis wife and two little children were sticnding their last hour with lilin , and whun the sheriff separated them the woman's screams were lioartionding to hear With her arms around her husbands neck she wept ns though her heart Woufd break , whllo the two little children clung to him und min gled their tears with their mothers Under such an ordeal few mon could rofrnin from tears , nml the tmfortuauto husband nnd father could hardly be blamed for shedding tears when there wns scarcely n dry eye among the few disinterested spectators to the awful scene The Indian sheilff and his aeputy , however , showed no fooling in the matter , neither did the executioner The poor woman carrying her youngesc child and louding the other , hurried away through the woods to gut * out of hearing of the shot that would mnke her a Widow As soon as she turned nwuy , the doomed man quicltly brushed the tears from his eves , us though ashamed of his weakness , and with one last look at his wifo'and little ones , told the sheriff to go ahcaa Ho then soatcd him self on a blanket spicad on the ground , while the sheriff hold ono of his bands and a deputy the ether The executioner , an aged Indian who hud performed that bloodv duty for forty years , sat down on n rock nbout ton yards distant , and taking his six-shooter ex amined the worning of the cylinder Thu shcrift bared the doomed mans breast , in : ri.i.T ion run iikuimi or ins nnviiT and pressed his fingers momentarily on the spoi The white spot left from this pres sure was ull the oxecutinner had for a tar get , but that was euough Ho put a bullet through the center of it The victim gave ono convulsive Jerk ana fell b.ickwiua , the blond spurting out from the bullet holes , ono in his breast , thu other in his back , for the bullet went through him Ills lingers closuil tightly , his llesh quivered , and lie was dead In a few moments his widow and children returned The poor woman fell on the bleeding boilv of her husbond and the sad scene was ro-cnactod , I tonic a piece of pa per , wadded it up and plugged up the wound where the bullet entered , to stop thu flow of blook Then turning away I roue , hastily from the placa Another Choctaw execution took place sev eral weeks previous to the ono Just described A young , full blooded Choctaw bad been convicted of murder and sentenced to bo shot Ho was then ordurod to Jail , but on piomisingto return on tbo day set for his execution , he was permitted to go without guard or bail , bound onlv by his word to re turn Two months rolled by and the duy for the youug braves execution ariivod A largo crowd of people gathered together at a quiet spot in the woods selected for the shootingj but thu pnucioat actor in the trag edy had not nut in an appearance His fa ther was there , however , and when some one intimated that the condemned man would not appear , the augrv father rebuked him severely and told him that when bis son gave his word ho kept it His words wcro soon proven , for his sou rode up to the crowd und dismounting hitcuod his pony tea a bush and then miprnuching the sheriff sig- nilied Ins willingness to meet his into 'I he sheriff allowed him to select his own execu tioner Ho selected a cousin who was pres ent , and then tailing a small piece of whlto paper , pinned it on his coat Just ever his heait und standing erect facing his execu tioner , ho received the bullet in bis breast and died almost instantly Fit i Nic Kniiti.n : , SAIiT IiAICU CITV NOTKii , 1 Increased Activity In Coiumcrctnl . I mid Itrnl Kntnto Circles M Salt Lixb Citt , Utah , Jan 8. ( Special I to Tim Ur.E.1 An unusual amount ot snow M and rain , which la the mountains Appears as fl snow , promises n fruitful year , The quos - tloaothow the precious liquid can bo bet / secured and applied occupies our city couu/ ell A largo reservoir wns recently oxci/ vntcd at the cast end of Tlrst South IK * expected to bo cemented to receive the spring flood * . The mountains furnish natural res ervoirs of the water needed by Our fields and gardens , nnd even m a dry season enough could bo secured by damming up the iiioun tain streams , building rosorvolrs , etc All tin * is in contemplation and the many now farms and gardens that are springing up under the Impulse of a largo immigration uro sure-to show the efforts This city has new n very cxtonslvo system of electric car lines , and moro are in con templation The electric ears have Just boon Btartcd for Liberty park , running down Main street and nlong the adjoin lug Btrcots It Is noticeable that the lines are all wolp " patronlrod , and that the s < stem Works well < With the rapid expansion of the city In ull directions , a system of rapid transit Is nulls pensuble , nnd the electric cars furnish it Among the oxpuusivo buildings tu bo oreclod early next spring Is ono by the Auor bacli brothers , to bo put up ut the corner of West Teniplo and Second South street , opp > . slto the Trlbuuo building , Tim Messri Aucrbauli are Just putting the finishing touches on a six-story business block on Main stioct , the l'rosross bulldlnu , which stitistles every condition of a llrst-class modern building It bus all The improve taunts and presents a very Imposing front Walker brothers have broken ground for.i row of line terrace buildings to bo rented early in the season 'Iho principal architect of the city , Mr Klolting , BhowoJ mo designs of a vorv , lmlatl.il residence , costing t. iUUOO which will i Jtt bo erected iu the course of the summer 1H Another mammoth hotel is talked of on llio west sldo It would bo impructicublo to notice - tico all the tlrst-class buildings In contempla tion Business Is gradually expanding , trying to reach westward whole the depots me Propel ty on First and Second south , some four to six blocKs west ot Main , is held at from ? 12ri to $1W ) per foot , which is very low , considering the location Nearer to Main \ Btreet , both east and west , prices wcr foot have ndviincod from f JoOaud $300 to $ l. "Q and $ S00 , or even more The dally papers bore have repeatedly given warning to these who expect to supply building malcriul that they must muUe their pieparutions on n very largo scale , Popula Hon is constantly streaming in , und it tilts continues , it will bo impossible to aecommo date the multitude unless building piucccds rapidly Fortunately quarries of the finest rod nnd gray standstono nro accessible by rail , the Fort Douglas road having been extended ns far as park City It is becoming quito tbo fashion to use tills slonu for fronts , In many coses to the exclusion of every other material A great deal of building wns done Inst year , but there bus not yet been a bulla lug boom There is every prospect for it tins ear , and to un extent little dioaiucd of bi' outcldeiB While the holidays have undoubtedly chocked to some oxteut the activity of the real estate tnnncct the snlos oil the aay after Christum * nevertheless amounted to 1103,2.11) , ) . The market has a verj decided upward tendency Among the sales may bo noticed a good many purchases of acreage for puilting , ohiofly south mitt west As thn city limits extend about ono and one-half miles across llio Jordan , the pait west of thu Jordan river Is now lecoivtng the attention s. , of speculators Acreage can still be had „ STL ? close to the lines of the business strcots HBH within fourteen t" fifteen blocks from Mum H street , at very low prices Twcntj acres H west of the Hlo Granuo & Western iloimt H nbout sixteen blocks from Main , was SOTCTTit ' " " $1,000 an ucre From $ i0 for thr lowest to t > l,200 for the best , accoruing to nearness tn main lines of travel , , are about thn prices of acrcugo west of the river , but lii3ido the oiti limits , though botb further north and south , prices nre raucn lower on tnat side of thu Jordan New real estate firms are spring ing up dally • * The holiday trade is reported to have sur passed the expectation of dealers 'Iho hotels are filled with visiting guests , and tbo anxious demand for houses by newcomer * continues A very slmule upparatusforobtuining an electrical spark is made by a Gor man physicist ISouud the center of a common lump chimney is pasted a Atrip of tinfoil , und another strip is paslod from ono end of the chimney to the within a quarter of on inch of this ring Then a piece of silk is wrapped around a brush aud the interior of the chimney rubbed briskly In the dark u bright electric spark may bo soon to pass from ono piece of tinfoil to the other eudh ' - m tlmo the brush is with drawn from the J M shinny Many ether experiments can J be tried with tno apparatus ISvon Satan I cars It , Jltwtuu Zftiiiiicifpf And Satan trembles when ho sees The wea kost saint upon his snec/o. All the rage Rod Cross Cough Drops , 5 cents per bos , sold every where SHUT THEM OUT ACAIN The New Jersey Rubber Shoe Co not only makes better and * more stylish , and a greater variety of goods than any other company , but it is now putting KEEL PLATES on all their Pirst Quality GrOOClssuch as Arctics Excluders , Lumbermens' and Heavy San dals , including boys , ladies1 and misses Arties , lETRZEIEi See that the New Jersey Rubber Shoe Co " is stamped in the sole of each pair of overshoes you buy , and you will get the full value of your money Your shoe dealer should have New Jersey goods in all widths , from A. A. to W. V , With Or without heels Also high Button Gaiters with Leather Button Fly I am western agent for the New Jersey Rubber Shoe Co , and carry an immense stock , which I sell At Wholesale Only . I also have a large stock of PELT BOOTS , ( all free from damage ) and German Socks N I SELL AT CHICAGO PRICES IT LINDSEY , llll Harney St , Omaha , Nebraska llll III ! 11 ! ! IMlWIl Mill IIIBIIM ITIH I r'TTT } TH ' 1 Till I I ! ! | | | | | 111 | | I 11 | | T