10 THE OMAHA DAILY BEE' ' SUNDAY , , SEPTEMBER 22 , 1SSU-SIXTEEN PAGES.
A SDLTAU'S RhSTLESS SIEEP.
Turkey's Luxuriant Ruler In Oon-
Dtant Fear of Assassination.
HIS IS A CROWN OF THORNS.
With Ten Millions n 1'enr , AlHoluto
rower mill HiimlrctU of llnnutl-
fiii Wive * Abdul Ilnmltl la
Not llnnpy.
Hnrrntvn of n Rultnti.
. by I'rank O.
CONSTANTINOPLE , Sept 1 , ISSO.-lSpcclnl
Corrcspondcnco ; to TUB HEK. ] On tlio
Mil of next September AbduMIimld
will to forty-Boven years old. Ho liiw nn cm-
plro nearly hnll the slzn of the United States
over whicli ho Is nbsoltito ruler , and bis word
moons llfo nnd death to moro thnn thirty-
three million people. Ho is the spiritual
head of the trcat Mohammedan rolli'lonaid ]
two hundred million lips spo.tlc his numo In
worship every day. Multitude * In India ,
North Africa , China nnd South Europe look
upon him as the ' 'Shadow ' of nod" nnd llko
the Turks of Asia Minor regard him as the
representative of Muhoaiot. Ho has an In-
'como of $10,030,000 a year. Ills treasury Is
filled with diamonds. His palace ? tire num.-
borcd by scores nnd llo counts his Aruuhorsoi
by the thousands. Ho has countless sorvnnst
to satisfy Ills every wish , nnd his harem ,
filled with the beauties of the
Orient , is replenished each year
with the fairest of the younjf foinulo
laves of Georgia and Clrcnssm. If physical
comfort , sensual enjoyments nnd worldly
power ara the chief ends of llfo this man ,
now m his prime , outfit to bo the happiest
roan m the world. Ho is on the contrary
ONI ! OP THE MOST MIBr.llVlIM ! .
Every ono of the roses of his llfo conceals
n thorn , and In each of his palaces tlio skele
tons of fear hklo In the closets , stand behind
the marble columns of the unions and polco
their bonds out at him through the perfumed
steam of his luxurious Turkish biith. Hav-
intr absolute control over millions of lives ho
exists In dally fear of the loss of his own ,
ana ha trembles as ho spends his nlchts nnd
days inside his croat palaces surrounded by
his guards. Ho moves union } ; his people
only when ho is forced to do so by the ro-
llglous observances which nra incumbent
upon him ns the head of Mohammedan ro-
Ilglon , nnd his only outlnp Ison Friday after
noon when no goes in sato to worship at the
mosque.
This fioromony Is ono of the grand sights
of Constantinople. The people would rUe in
insurrection If the sultan omitted it , and it
takes seven thousand troops to guard him on
his way from his palace to the ulico of wor-
shlo. The fiivorlo inosriuo of the sultan is
that of Hamldica. ItVAS built by him nnd It
s a beautiful structure of white marolo with
great minarets rising hundreds of feet above
| ts airy dome and looking out ever the Bos-
fhorup , Stamboul nnd tlio sea of Marmora.
[ t is near the sultan's great pnlauc , called
Vlldlz , nnd it is in the English quarter of
Constantinople , known as POM. A wide ,
winding road loads from the paluce to the
mosque , and at the side of this a house has
been built by the sultan for distinguished
foreign guests. This house Is just opposite
the mosque and its windows command a line
view of it und the roads leading to It. Armed
with the card of the American minister and
accompanied by my Mohammedan guide I
was received by the officer in charge
when I called at this house yes
terday. I was given a scut at ono
of the windows and for two hours preceding
the ceremony I was I mere's ted in the mass
ing ot the soldiers and in the preparation
for
TUB COMINO OP TIIE SUI.TAX.
First came n little urmy of carts drawn by
donkeys and led by bare-legged men in tur
bans. These carts were lllled with soft yel
low sand , nnd this eand was spread ovorllio
road to , the depth of several inches. The
sultan's royul bones arc too holy to bo jolted
ever cnbblc Htones or macadum _ , and when
ever ho goes out to drive the rbau ever which
ho intends to march is covered with sana.
After the carts ctimo water wazons and the
nand was sprinkled to nmko it softer and
firmer. As time cous on tlio soldiers march
up division uftcr division nnd rank them
selves along the highway. There arc regi
ments of cavalry on the finest of Arabian
steeds , each logiment having horses of the
same color , and nearly every regiment uni
formed differently. Hero is n troop
of Circassians with black caps six
inches high , upon the crown ot which
nro white crosses. They uro dressed
In European uniforms nnd upon their breasts
arc rows of cartridges. lielow them nro cav
alry from Asia Minor , nnd coming down the
hill in the distance uro troops alter troops of
bronzo-faccd line iooKtng men in turbans nnd
cups on tlio llnest of Arabian horses. The
soldiers arc tall , broud-shoulderod und
straight. Down another road march long
lincsof infantry , some In the green colors of
Mahomet uua others iu clothes of blue
trimmed with red. As the hour for the cotn-
ing of the Sultan approaches , the roads turn
into
itivmts OF coi.oit ,
and along the side of them , bacn of the sol
diers , arc seen tlio curious characters at a
Mohammedan crowd. There at the right is
a patch of whitu , nnd you note that the hun
dred bulloun-lik'j bags of white cotton
or silk , which scum to stand upright
oil tlio ground uro ullvo , und takiiic
your glass you see that out of each
bag near the top peeps two blncic eyes und
you know that these nro the ladles of sev
eral Mohammedan linretns , who hnva como
out to got a v'cw of the sultan. Now como
the oflicors of the court. They dnvo up in
carriages drawn by magnificent horses.
Some of them como on horseback , nnd tlio
breasts of nil arc covered with mcdals , whila
tholr clothes of European cut fairly blaze
with gold loco. Each man wears u bright
fez cap , wnlcn looks lilto u gigantic red
tumbler Inverted , nnd thcso caps crown the
heads of the soldiers ns well , making the
wbolo crown look llko n great human llowor
bed of red.
There la 11 cheer from 10,000 throats nnd
the inusto is heard in the distance. The cry
goes up that the xultan is coming , and now
around the corner prcceocil by a gorgeously
dressed guard upon horseback , surrounded
by oQIccra , with swords drawn , comes
n low baroucha driven by the most
inagulllccut black horses .YOU have
over Been. These nro driven by a
coachman whoso body Is resplendent In a rod
velyot suit umbroldurod in gold. Ha has a
fez cap on his head nnd as ho holds the ruins
tight Ills gold sleovus hunt ; down llko these
of the ladles' fushlonubla dress of some years
ago. The carriage Is black but Us trimmings
are gold. Tim lumps at the sides uro gold ,
and the horses are resplendent in gold
buckles and trimmings , In the rarringo it-
Bolt three persons nro seated. On the front
Boat I note u line , grny-whlnkcrod old man.
It is Os in a n 1'usliu , the hero of I'lovnn. und
brsido him is u younger man , a favodto of
the sultan. On the baulc seat situ the sultun
himself. Ho Is , moro t > lmply dressed than
any ono of the iu,000 pooplu surrounding him ,
nnd his clothes nro the morning suit of a gentleman -
tloman , the coat cut high at the ucck like
that of au Episcopal clergyman wiion out ol
the pulpit. Ills coat i&odgod with red cord
and bo wears the same kind of a boiled shirt
and turn-ever collar that you do. Ills head
U covered with u rod fez cap whicli
yon could buy for $1 , and below
this look out a pair of laruo. liquid
dark cyos through a face which is of the
amo sallow hue , and which bus the same
features as that of Jay Gould. Jay
Gould's fuco la tlio
TWIN Olf til * SULTAN'S.
The two men hava the same nose und the
same ucrvous-worn features. The sullai !
t uorlmps a trltla taller than 'Gould , und 1
. would judge that ho wolgnod perhaps twont
pounds more. Ho la , I judge , ubout live
feetnltio inches high , and -ho weighs aboul
ono hundred und fifty pound * . His fauo I :
the color of old Jersey cream , mid bis eye :
uro largo , black and restletis. Ho has u high
narrow forehead , a long thin fuce , u MOM
just slightly Inrllnoit to the Koinun , and hi
wears u full sst of short , luxuriant , glosnv.
black wulsKuis , Ills luuula uro long nnd
thlu , and ho has thu look of u mau who lloi
nwako at night. Ho docs not look llko n
happy man , and his eyes wondered hero and
thcro M ho roda slowly over the sanded
way to the gates of the unosquo. As ha
passed the housn nf entertainment ho looked
up nnd raised his hand to his fez cap In sal
utation. Hu thnn drove on to the mosque
nnd going up n private stairway was soon
hia from view. As ho entered the pate the
soldier * nil turned around In order Hint tholr
faces might bo towards him , and when In
the course of nn half hour ho appeared again.
they resumed tholr old position.
The Sultan seldom goes to the mosqua
twica In the same way. Yesterday a mag
nificent riding horse was led behind the car-
i Intro and shortly after his majesty arrived a
low carriage drawn by a pair of milk whlto
imnies tvus driven up to the front of the
masquo. The servants of the sultan hrul not
boon told as to how ho prdnosod to go homeward -
ward and thoto thrco different equipments
were present In order that ho might ride on
horseback , drive his ponlos , or go back In
his barouche
AS im svw TIT. k
Ho preferred the ponlos nnd 1 hnd a coott
chance to sco him ns ho drove back lip the
lilll with the ribbons in his hands. Behind
him cnmo sover.il carriages containing Indies
of his harem , nnd I noted that a dozen beg
gars followed tli ese and that the ladles
within them throw out handful * of coin to
them , over which they fought as It fell upon
the sanded road.
I have scon the sultan several times dur
ing my stay In Constantinople. I saw him
twlco at the moiquo and I saw him when ho
mndo his annual procession across the
Golden Horn to Stamboul to kiss the mantle
of Mahomet , which Is preserved in the old
Seraglio. I tiavo mot some of the most noted
of his olllulals mid h'avo had numerous con
versations with mon Who have been con
nected with his palacoforyoars. The sultan
likes to wall his doings with secrecy , mid
only the barest details of his nrlvnto llfo ara
known to the general public. Within the
gates of his great pilnco only his iutimato
friends and his most trusted servants come ,
and I am told that ho has such
A I'Elll OF ASSASSINATION
that ho has men continually on guard , both
about his person , at his doors nnd about his
watch towers. The palaces of Ylldlz nre nil
built upon hills. Their grounds contain
many ncr < ) s mid they consist of ravines ,
through which flow babbling brooks , of for
ests and hikes , of parks and of gardens.
They rise almost straight up from the beginning -
ginning of the IJosphorous and the
thirty or forty palaces which his
majesty owns here nil command
views of the surrounding country. Not
withstanding this elevated position the sul
tan still fears plotting * nnd assassinations.
Ho trusts few people implicitly , and ho sel
dom goes to bed at night. Ho sits up until I
o'clock , amusing himself ns best ho can. nnd
then throws himself into a cushioned chnlr
and dozes on till daybreak , when ho retires
to his bed to sleep. Ho has these about him
in whom ho thinks he can contiilo , but the
fate of ins oredccossors warns hlmjtobowaro.
During the thirteen years of his reign ho
has had several revolutions , nr.d ho was
frightened almost to death when thu czar of
Russia was assassinated.
Ho linn n number of other palaces outside
of this ono in which ho lives , but ho seldom
occupies them for moro than u few hours at
a time. Ono of his largest palaces is that of
Dolmu Bagtohc , which seems to rest on the
waters of the Bosphorus and which is a
great airy structure of stone and stucco ,
painted so it looks like marble. It is sur
rounded by beautiful eardcns und parks ,
nnd is gorgeously furnished with rich car
pets , crystal cnandeliers and with all tlio
beautiful things that money can ourchase.
This palace was that in which Sultan Abdul
Aziz lived , and the upiior paitot it was de
voted trTTiis harem. When It is roinombercd
that this mau spout nearly
53,000,030 A Ycvit
on this"'part of his household alone , some
idea of the grandeur of the furniture can bo
conceived. In one year Abdul Azziz spent
M > 00,000 for pictures , and there was nothing
too costly for his palaco. I went through
this palace by means of a special permit of
the sultan , and I saw great crystal posts as
big around as tuo body of : i man , nnd moro
than six foot tail , ou the top of which were
immense candelabra , the prismatic crystals
of which sparkled like the diamonds of Sin-
bad , the sailor , under the rays of the lht. !
I passed through room after room finished in
gold and Walled with satiu. I entered the
most luxurious of bath rooms and spent
some time in tlio grand audience hall whuro
the sultan holds his receptions at Bairam or
the Mohammedan Easier. I walked upon
the court in front of the palace , aloug the
beautiful waters of the Bosuhoru * . nnd
looked at the yacht uf the sultan which ,
with steam up , stands unused in front of
thu iil.XL-o ; ; and as I did so I re
membered the story which ono of the
sultan's ofllcials told me as to why his
majesty novcr occupied this gnmd buildmir
over iilght. It is , said the ofllcia ] , because of
n warning which the lust sultan gave him.
ThU suluui woke up ono morning to Und the
gun boats , which ho had built to guard him
self. turned against him , and ho rdviscd
Abdul Humid never to occupy a palace
xvhich could bo as easily stormed as this
ono.
ono.Tho sultan of Turkey is
vcnv FOND oi1 uousns.
Ho has ubout two thousand in bis stables ,
und these have been brought hero from all
parts of the world. His finest horses are of
Arabian blood , und you will Und nowhere m
the world such horses as uro seen upon the
streets here in Constantinople. The street
car horses have the finely arched neck
characteristic of the Arabian , und in every
troop of cavalry there are hundicds of
horses which would bring the hitrliest of
prices in America. It is usralust the law of
Turuoy to export Arabian horses , und whan
Senator Palmer wanted u couple of stallions
for Ills breeding farm near Detroit ho bad
to get the permit of the sultan himsolr to
buy thorn. The sultau himself is a good
rider , and he Is much inter
ested in horse training und breodiug.
IDs stables cover many acres ,
und tlicro'is a croattraluing place connected
with them where bis majesty sometimes
comes and watches the oxurclsing of his
horses. Ho prefers the Arabian horses for
riding horses , nnd his favorite mount is a
beautiful bay. His rides are taken in the
parks \vhieh surround his palace , nnd which
are of u great extent. Ills friends often rule
with him , and General Low Wallace und ho
often rode togo her. Ho sometimes hunts
upon horse back , and I am told that ho is a
gooa shot. Ho once told General Wallace
that ho hud broken half a dozen vases whh a
revolver whllo galloping past tbom on horse
back. and ho often hunts deer und duck in his
parks.
The Sultan is thoroughly posted on all
matters relating to horses. .Ho keeps track
of the military affairs nnd Is posted on all
new Inventions In arms. .Not long ago thora
was sent to him from America a sot of the
Moybridgo photographs , consisting of instan
taneous pictures ol the horse in action. The
American minister and thu moo of our lega
tion looked at these pictures , but did not era
much utility In them. The moment the
sultau saw them ho grasped at the
advantage they would bo to lioruo
training , and ho explained to the minister
what they meant , do nfionvards olTero.l
Mr. Straus a present of a eouplo of line Arab
horses but the minister explained that ho did
not think it would bo right for him to accept
presents and ho dcolinod the gift. Ho gave
presents to General Grant nnd to several
other Americans nnd ha has made some pres
ents to Abrupt S. Hewitt. Ho Is
VKUV roxi ) of
nnd I urn told that ho Is very anxious tohnvo
American capital brought into the develop
ment of his country. When Vutidorbllt vis
ited Constantinople ho gave hltn an auiilonca
and prouoBod to him tno Investment of soina
of his millions lii Turiiuy. Mr. Yandorbilt
explained ho hud other uses for his monuy
just at that lima and It was the same with
Stanford. Senator Stanford , bowovor , told
the Sultan ho would bo glud to build railroads -
roads iii Turkey if no were a younger and
poorer man , and that ho would ask notlilnt !
hotter than the chances which tlio Turkish
ompiru oflorcd for American money making ,
It will bo soon from this Unit ttiu sultan Is
Interested in the development of his country.
lie would , I doubt not , make an able ruler If
his people and his creditors would lot him.
Through the exiravacuncas , however , of the
sultans of the past Turkey Is loaded down
with debt and the empire is practically bank
rupt. The foreign bondholders rcguluto the
collection of the taxes and foreign ofllcers sit
ut the seat oi customs The tniltiui never
HCTJS the tribute which Egypt uaya to him
yearly , and his every act is tempered by for
eign Influence. Surrounded us ho Is , ho does
tli bout ho can , hoping against liopo , and ho
Is much moro of u ruler in fact tlmu Is gen
erally supposed , Ho does a # reat deal of
work. Ho IOOKS ever a great part of his
correspondence and dictates mutters to his
various ofllciuls. Ho has the veto power on
all things relating to his people , and ho uow
nnd then takes matters Into his own hands
nnd countermands the nets of his grand
vizier. Ho has the nbsoluto appointment of
all the officers In the empire , but ho has to
trim his sails very caroftillv for fear ho will
pot tlio fanatical party of Turkey down upon
him. The irrnnd vllor Is his premier nnd ho
has his cabinet of ndviscrs ns hos the presi
dent nt Washington. Ho roads the turklsh
newspapers and bus mon who trnnslntn such
articles from the foreign papers as bear upon
Turkey . Ho wants to know everything that
Is said about his country , whether It Is good
or bad , nnd ho was lately very much Inter
ested In nn article on his klngonm published
In the Now York newspapers. Ho gives his
people nmplo chance to brlncr tholr griev
ances before him nud every time ho goes to
prayer
PETITIONS XIlBrnESBSTCO TO HIM.
They are holrt out by the petitioners nnd ono
of his nld-do-camp takes them and his
majesty looks over them when ho returns to
his palnco. Such as morlt Inquiry are Inves
tigated nnd tholr wrongs nra righted.
The most Interesting thlntf in connection
with the sultan , however , Is his life tasido
the royalTialnco. The stones of his harem ,
of how his wives are cho on nml 'of the ups
nnd downs of married llfo In Turkey will al-
xvays bo now to the people of the Christian
world , and of these I will treat In my next
letter. FKAXI : G. CAIIPC.NTCK.
Cnn Yn Toll Mo ? *
in men/orThe net.
Can toll this should bo
you mo why , f
In every land , on every son , „ -
Why sun should always shine for s6mc , .
And shadows ever others comet
Can you toll mol
Can you tell mo why honest toll , ,
Should bo defrauded of thospoil ; '
Why ooverty , und grief nnd qall. . , .
Should bo so great , nnd sweetness smalll
Can you tell mo I t
Can you toll mo why buds unmade ,
Should blossom , and then droop nnd'.faao ;
Why little children , pure nnd f roe , r.
Should sinful men nndvornon hoi >
Can you tell mol
Can you tell mo why woman's lot
Is so Ill-cast , und man's Is not ; . k >
Why she , the weaker of the pair ,
Must still the greater burden heart
Can you tell mol
Can you toll mo when nlfis done , i. * 3 - . *
Thu curtain dropped nt.sot of "ftuuV - : > , ' . * . .
Why man of man speaks words of 'pfniso *
When ho needs not the wasted lays ?
Cnn you toll mot
JOHN G. TBMPLR.
Denver , Sept. 20.
A MONSTER GOLD BRICK.
The tiargcst Bar In tlio World Turned
Out nt Helriin.
The liu'Rcst gold bar ever cast-in fho
world wn.3 turned out nt the United
States mint here hist night , eaya a
Helena special. The bullion cnmo from
the Spotted Horse , Drum Lummon and
Jay Gould mines , nnd the work was
done under the supervision ol Superin
tendent Brnidon. Tlio largest eruoiblo
would hardly hold 1 ho enormous charge ,
nnd with the hottest furnaces it took a
long time to molt the 7)reeious metal.
Sixteen men were encaged in the task ,
and , nftor eight hours' work , the mass
was finally successfully poured into the
largo mold specially prepared. It toolc
all night to cool , and oven nt 10 this
morning the great brick was still warm.
In shape the lirjclc is a section of u
pyramid , the base being I8x7i inches ,
height 7i inches , and top surface 17x0
inclios. Its woiglit is 6,1345 ounces , or
about five hundred pounds avoirdupois.
Its vnluo is n trifle ever $100,000. The
baris to bo the center piece of a min
eral monument , which will ho placed on
exhibition at Minneapolis nnd How
York. The display will consist of tout-
bars of lead for the base tit the monument
ment , four bars oE copper for the
second course , four bars of sil
ver for the third , on top
of the whole to rest Iho 6100,000 gold
bar , and the monument will bo sur
rounded by .specimens of quartz nnd ere
from nil parts of Montana.
.
Tlio Coal Supplies of iho World.
In view of the question which has
suggested itself on moro than ono oc
casion as to how long it would bo be
fore the old world' 'coal deposits would
become exhausted , tlio Doutsclio Han-
dols-Mueum 8uppno"s some interesting
lijrured relating io , the world's coal
Holds outside of the North American
continent. According to these , the low
countries , Switzerland , Denmark , Ger
many und Bohemia , possess coal mines
of a surface area of nbout fifty-nino
thousand square miles. Russia alone
has 22,000 tqunre miles. The deposits
o ( the island of Formosanmounttosome
thing like 10,000 square miles , some of
the coal veins ranging up to ninety-six
feet in thickness. The coal fields of
Austria , Spain , Portugal , Italy ,
Greece , Turkey nnd Persia cover
nbout thirty-ni no thousand square
miles , these of India . ' (5,000 ( nnd these of
Japan 0,000 srjuaro miles , while these of
China are estimated ut the ouormous
ligura of 400,001) ) square miles. But
these arc not all. The Falkland islands ,
Patagonia nnd Peru , nro very rich in
coal , \vhilo the southern pnrt of Chili is
one immense deposit. In Brazil veins
varying in thickness from seventeen to
twority-llvo fool , are found in numbers ,
and in the United States of Columbia
there is nn abundance of the in in oral.
Mexico nnd the Vnticouvor iblands uro
also well supplied , there being proba
bly not far from 20,000 square miles ,
while the deposits thus far discovered
in Tasmania , Now Caledonia and Natal
are estimated to cover 100,000 square
miles , the larger number of these
deposits not yet having boon worked.
Without reckoning iho immoiiHO stores
of coal in tlio United States , and merely
relying upon these given above , there
seems to bo but little prospect of n coal
famine for some years.
Coughs and colds como uninvited , but
you can quickly got rill of these with n.
few doses of Dr. J. H. McLean's Tar
Wine Lung Balm.
Hnznr , Morplilnn nnd Ilevolver ,
A razor , morphine nnd a rqvolVor
were the means adopted by "William 1C.
Lento , of Seville , Putnam county , to
kill Himself to-day , says a Sanford
( Flu. ) special. Ho first cut nn nrtory in
his arm , then drank a vial of morphine
and finally shot himself in the Hoail ,
Financial dilllcultios are supposed to
have boon the cause of this , us ho hnd
run through his own money , nnd rumor
hnu it alho of his mother's fortune. His
father was Dr. Frederick R. Lento , n
well-known Now York physician. At
his death , in 1881 , younsr Lento organ
ized n company to start u town faouth of
horo. llo was also interested in rail-
loads nnd was well known throughout
the state.
o
Applied to iho Wrontr I'lucc.
The following result is significant
ns lo the result of the prohibitory
laws :
WATUHI.OO , Douglns Co. , Nob.
Willow Springs Distilling Co..Omnha ,
Nub. : You will ploasa KOIH ! mo a
ctitnloguo of your "tempornnco drink , "
Have you any "Peach Cider" and ' 'Hoe
BooV" If not , please recommend us to
bomo ono who does keep it.
Youm truly , W. A , RoomiM.
Query : What has the distillery to do
with loninoraiu'o drinks ?
Moral : * Buy "Kennedy's East India
Bitters , "
Oun fond llullnn ( < oiu * .
Out of 21G mon passing along Main
street in Cincinnati on n recent uftoi-
noon , 210 hud lost one or moro of the
hind buttons oil their couts ,
SAHSGS OFTflE : FUNNY MAN
i
Some Waifs ftojh , io World of Wit
mitt'Humor.
HOW HE GOJ'HIS ' EXERCISE.
n . , i .
Tli la Sprinter Had , n Ilaby A Heart"
less Girl's > HCTCIIRO A
Drnw OoTcfcft'JYom Over
. > i a \
tlio.OQcnn.
i j
A Very Drllnlto Aimwor.
Tcclicho llumlschnu : The examiners
ot military candidates ( or the rank of
ensign ntlnch n certain value lo smart
ness iu the replies given by the stu
dents. Not long ago u teacher of geogra
phy asked n candidate the startling
question :
"How wide is the Seine near Lon
don V"
The reply cnmo without iv moment's
hesitation : "As wide ns the Thames
near Paris , "
Orcnt CurionltlcH.
Exchange : The spur of a moment.
The horns of n dilemma.
A nick of Llino.
A bono of contention.
Purlinmontnry whips ,
A man of straw ,
A man of truth.
The thread of stories.
A ship of Btnto.
A fly on n wheel.
A boo in a bonnot.
The point of n joke.
The dark horso.
A political warming pan.
A circle in which men argue.
The historicsword and pen.
The silver tongue ot an orator.
Tlio features of n plucked candidate.
Tim ICxnct Locality.
Judge : Two of the Boodfcst-looking
tramps that you co'uld possibly meet in
n long day's drive were brought up in
the police court.
"Where do you UvoV" naked the
mngistrnto.
"Nowhere " of the
, replied ono vaga
bonds.
"And "
youV"
"MoV Oh , I room on the floor nbovo
ray pal. " _
AVImt Would Ilnpnon.
Merchant Traveler : "Humph , " said
Brown to .IOIIOH , "that's a uico way that
fellow Diogenes of whom J was just
reading spends his time. "
"Do you refer to his practice of hunt
ing for nn honest mnnV"
"Yes.- '
"Well , nobodj' Qboa such things now
adays. " '
"No ; if Diogqnos , were to try any
such thing as that , in New York to-day
he'd get run in by > a bunko stoeror be
fore ho'd bceh out two hours. ' '
In Union 'I horn Is StrmifjUi.
Puck : Teacher Now , children , your
have peon how string n bundle of sticks is
and how weak ouchstick , is by itself.
This experiment illustrates the motto ,
"In union there is ( Strength. " Now ,
who can crivo me another illustration ,
ono that relates to the American na
tion ?
Patsy O'Hooligan ( son of an alder
man ) Oikin. ' ho Amerikyns divides
thoirsolvos inter republicans , an' demo
crats , an' prohibitionists , nn' mug
wumps , nn' all sorts o' things , philo the
Oirish sticks together an' gits nil the
orflces.
A Modern Ki ltuj > li.
ArMlne Jlnderton.
\Vo bury his Fauntleroy collar.
His Fauutleroy suit und sash ;
While our tears flow swift and steady
For our beautiful drcain ao rush.
Wo thought the sweet lord so lovely ,
And that Tommy would look nnd say ,
"Dearest " llko the
, just darhug ;
But ho wasn't built that way.
A. Sad I'rcdiciiiiiont.
Lo Figaro : "Well. Murquis De Cnli-
nnux , have you had a pleasant jour
ney ? "
"I was ill the whole of the time ; I
cannot boar traveling by rail with my
back to the engine. "
"You ought to have changed places
with ono oftho other passengers. "
"Impossible. I was nil alono. "
Boston Budget : Friend So you hnvo
another race booked. I haven't soon
you taking tlio regulation exercise spins
to got yourself in conditionwhile I have
mot your opponent religiously prepar
ing himself for the encounter.
Famous Sprintci Oh , I take my ex
ercise at night.
Friend Where and lioxv ?
Famous Sprinter At homo. The
baby gives me nil the exercise I need ,
and moro loo.
The Chicnco Man Got There.
Washington Post : A St. Louis man
and a. citizen of Chicago were discuss
ing the location of the world's fair in
front of Iho Ebhitt house last ono'ning.
"I don'D feoo tvhy St. Louis sficuld
want the fair , anyway , " said the Chicago
cage man ; "she already lias ono of the
most important features of a fair. "
"To what do you refcrV" nsked the St.
Louis man , deeming this some sort of a
compliment.
'I refer to the price that is charged
for admission to the town. "
And everybody present who hnd paid
the St. Louis bridge faro smiled audi-
My.
Why llo Hconimi u Ilachnlor.
Noxv York Mercury : A young lawyer ,
who had hoon instructed that when n
witness declared tiatio ) ) was this or that ,
it was oshontial tluitiho should bo made
to tell when and for what reason ho became -
came so , thus utilised' ' his instructions
when trying his Hl-st case with a wit
ness that ho had under cross-examina
tion : I
"Aro you a marjiod , man1 he asked ,
"No , sir ; I am a , bachelor , " wus the
answer. , , )
"Thea , sir , " said the young lawyer.in
a stern tone , ' 'will you jiloiuo toll this
court how long yofl liitve been a bache
lor , and what wore the circumstances
that induced youjpbqcomo ouoy"
Mnklnt ; Hap Hi I'rom-oHH.
Time : Tucker"j-iBj'iw your son in the
country to-day , Parker. llo hud his
camera with him , I.believe.
Parker YOB ; ho wont out to take
eoino views , I suppose. Was ho making
good progress ?
Tucker Yon bet ho was , and dust ,
too. Somebody's rod Dull was after
him.
A ZciiloitH Functionary.
Frcisinnigo Zoitung : A now road
was nbout to bo uiuclo in n certain par
ish in the Bohmorwnld. The t > urvoyor
cnmo. took his observations nnd , with
considerable euro and exertion , Btakod
out the rotid. When this part of tlio
work hnd been done ho went to the
mayor of the parish und eald : "I must
ask you to see that the poles nro not
stolen over Sunday , " On Monday
morning the surveyor came buck. Sure
enough the stakes , had gone. The
mayor hnd locked thorn up for safety In
the town hnll. _ _
An AlHont'Mlmlcd I'rofcMor.
Blumonloso : Professor C hnd
gone to spend the evening nt n friend's
house. When he was nbout to leave , it
vrns mining cuts and doga , wherefore
the hostess kindly offered him accom
modation for the night , which ho read
ily accepted. Suddenly the guest dis
appeared , nobody knowing what hnd
become of htm , nnd the family wcro
nbout to retire for the night , when
Professor C - walked in , ns wet as a
drowned ratl Ho hnd boon homo to
fetch his night shlrtl
Itovr.tiite.
London Tid-Bits ! A well known cltl-
zen , who is something of a performer
upon the piano , recently pnssednn even
ing at the house of n yimng lady. The
company was agreeable , and ho stayed
somewhat Into.
As ho rose to take his doparluro , the
young Indysnid : "Pray , don't ' go yet ,
Mr. H1 - , I want you to piny something
for mo. "
"Oh , you must excuse mo to-night. It
is very Into , nhd I should disturb the
neighbors. "
' "Never mind the neighbors , " nn-
sworod the young lady , quickly ; "thoy
polsonodour dog yesterday. "
On the I'TOO ' ijlst No Ijoniror.
.Chicago Tribune : Citizen "Hollo ,
Jnkol Still in the fruit business , nro
you'/ These punches look - ' '
Jnko ( monhcincly ) "Keen your dirty
hands off'n them peaches. If you want
any , you buy 'cm. You're not a p'licc-
. "
mannow.
_
A Biir Draw.
Calondnrlo Tolodario : "Dear rae ,
by w sad you look ! "
"I hnvo n horrible toothnohe. "
"Ddyou como from the dentist's ? "
"Yes ; ho hns just drawn four - "
"Four molars' ? "
"No , four shillings. "
Aslotililinimu. Ovfironuin Him.
' .Tddgo : In Washington : Stranger
"I wouldllko to sco General Greoly. "
Weather bureau oillcinl "General
Greoly can't bo seen , sir. He's sick. "
" serious I . "
Stranger "Nothing , hope.
Weather bureau oillcinl "Yes sir ,
but it is. His prediction for yesterday
came trtto.
_
Her Ijittlc On mo.
.Drake's Magazine : Mrs. Gull ( in
dry goods store ) "I wish , if you please ,
that you'd give mo samples of six or
seven different patterns in surah silks ,
and n few samples of colored velvet ; n
friend of mine would like them ; nnd
I'd like n sample of this green India
ailk. 1 want n dress of some kind nnd
a sample of this figured silk , too , please ,
nnd ono of this pink satin. Thanks.
I'll decide soon nbout the dress.
Mrs. Gnll { outside the etoro ) "Ono ,
two. thrco , live , eight , eleven , fifteen
nineteen perfectly lovely samples in
nil ! Six or seven moro as Inrge ns these
will make n whole block for my now
crazy quilt. I'll go around to Ribbon &
Linnon's nnd get them before I go
home.
_
No Kolnto.
Arizona Kicker : Wo desire to state
in the most explicit iiianncr that no ro-
bnte will bo allowed to nny one of our
subscribers who may be obliged to leave
town for the benefit of the community ,
or who may bo hanged nnd buried for
the same reason. In several Into in
stances friends of such subscribers have
called on us and nsked us to cash up
for the unoxpired term , but wo have
invariably refused. Subscriptions to
the Kicker run for ono yonr. Wo con-
trnct to deliver the paper for that time.
if the subscriber is arrested , driven oil ,
or hanged , it is no fault of ours. Please
bear this in mind nnd save yourselves
trouble. _
Ilio Best Qualification of All.
London Exchange : A good many
years ago a farmer not far from Dun
blane had a son whom he was anxious
to have trained for n lawyer. Ho wont
to Dunblane one day to see Mr. B. , with
whom ho was very intimate , to know if
thnt gentleman would take ftis bon as a
dork. The following conversation en
sued :
Mr. B. "Well , John , what qualifica
tion has your son ? "
John "Wccl , he's a clover boy , n
guid scholar , and gran' in the uptnk'I"
Mr. B. "Arc those nil the qualifica
tions ho hns , John'/ "
"Na. he hnsnnither ; the fiend himsol'
couldnn' baud the candle till him for
looinl'1
Mr. B. "Send him in , John , send
him in. "
_
Saved n Iiif't * .
Time : Solomon Isaacson "Haf you
hoard the news , Sharob , dot I hat safed
dhoso lifcs oaf Reuben Cohen dhis
- ? ' '
morning alt-oily
"Noin , mine Iriendt , how was dot ? "
"Ho fell off de douk und couldn't
sch wi in. "
, 'Und you schumped in und helluped
him oud ? "
"Ach , du lieber ! T sch reams , 'come
oud und I pays you del $10 1 owe you' ,
und ho climbs dot water oud like a
doock , " _
Talki 111 : Shop.
Puck : Miss Chiff Would you believe -
liovo it ? Old Mr. Grump , who is
thought BO reserved , told mo last night
that ho was n believer in first impres
sions.
Miss Kccnnn Why , don't you know
he's a dealer in etchings ?
MoneymnkiiiK Schema
Life : Tnwkor How can you afford
to send your family to Saratoga when
yon told mo only last mouth that you
were broke ?
Cawkor Oh , Tin in n now business
now. I have started a drop-a-nickol-in-
thoslotnndascertain the-mnchino-is-
-order-company. .
Didn't Cnmu to Worlc Overtime.
Birmingham Post : Chief ( to indus
trious clerk in government ollico ) Why
didn't you dot the "i" in Iho last word
of your report hibt night ?
Industrious Clerk i bog your pardon ;
but you sco the clock struck 4 just nt
that point , and I didn't care to work
overtime.
_ _
Mis Clluico.
Tom Miwm in Jtfe.
"Where do jou think , " said she ,
"Tlio Worlds' fair ouelit to bei"
Hu drew her to his Bide ,
And hugging ller. replied ,
"I'm Bailslfod , my dear ,
To hold the fair right here , "
A K < * IIII | > IIU' Gratitude ,
Republics are not always ungrateful.
President Krugor , whoso valor against
tlio English founded the Transvaal re
public , wanted ! K55XU ( ) the other day for
a business operation , nnd the Transvaal
parliament lent it to him nt 21 pur cant
instead of the legal South African rule
of 10 per cent.
AraliH in Hut United Htntrx.
Thcro ure iiltogothor nbout 17,000
Arabs in this country , nnd not 10 per
cent of them Imvo n settled homo or
nnyothor means of support than jied-
dling. _
For Indios.tliB oeut and purest tonic is
Angostura Bitters , It effectually cures
dybpopdlu , und tones up the system. Dr.
J. O. B. Bio crt & Sous , M'frs , At
druggists.
DR. R. BAILEY ;
DMJXTIST.
The original purchaser in Omaha of the formula for Dr. Stlntiua' Looa
Auroothotio for the PAINLESS EXTRACTION OF TEETH.
The ONLY JIKTHOD whcrouy teotli ftro extracted without pain or < l < iiitor. ( ( iiuVvlthout uilns
hlorof orni , tjns , ether or ofoctricltjr. Th pntlcut remains perfectly conscious ot H that trni -
sulre.i , but fools no sensation ot piitn ,
NoBoroncssot tliu Rums nftor extracting , ns h tlio cnsn with so many no-culled nnnosthcttos.
M nny who Imvo been sulTorlnu from badly docnyed nnd brokonteetn and roots , have visited lr
Dalley nnd Imd them removed painlessly.
After Imvliin used ihU nmustliotlc for two months for nearly crory tooth oxtrnrtod In thU
ofllco , the VIU8T PKUSON is to bo found that Is not cntlreljsntuflcd with Its merlin. Some dentlota
tnny try to projudlco you ngnlnnt vhltliift us : < lo not allow them to do so. Mnko us n mil whether
you desire dentnl work or not ! wo are M\vnys plpnaed to see nny or nil ho may choose lo como.
Pi > orlnl attention civon to HIIiMNO tooth , thereby preserving tholr usefulness many years.
DO NOT U)9B TKUflt THAT CAN UK 8AVBI ) .
TEETH WITHOUT PLATES , Brldgo Work , Gold and Poroolaln faoo
Crowns , GOLD , ALUMINUM , SILVER , CONTINUOUS GUM and RUB
BER PLATES at lowest ratos.
A Fall Set of Teeth on Rubber for $5.00. $
DO NOT FORGET THE LOCATION ,
DR. BAILEY DENTIST
, ,
Paxton Block , 16th and Fariiam Streets.
( Entrance on 10th Street )
Cut this out , mentioning this impor.
Brownell Hall !
BOARDING AND DAY SCHOOL
,
Corner of Tenth nnd Worthlngton Streets , Omaha , Nob.
The ROY , Robert Dohcrty , S , T , D , , Rector ,
Fall Term Begins Wednesday , September 11. For Particulars
Apply to the Rector.
A. B. MEYER & Co. ,
Dealers In Best Grades of
103 S , I51i ! St. , Opposite Postoffice ,
Storage Yards , Cor , Jones & 5tli Sts , Telephone 1490 ,
We solicit a trial order from you.
REMINGTON TYPEWRITER ,
TI1KNH rhIIB UI/rilA ofKrlllnK machines li
nniinl lor Its bpci'il , Coinpucliius of key board ,
Mmpllcltr of cunctructloa , I no ol oiorntlon ntul
unit durability. Don't i\pcrlmont : nltli clienp tun-
clilnus know wlnit K'c'ttliiK wlirn
; jou yuu nro you
buy tin : llouiliiEton. Don't rely on asniTllono mnilo
by so cullcil lompptltorx. An vxnmlnnllon cost *
> ou nntliltiK nnd ituiy nnvu you from purclinHhur a
Mi > riliii" miiclilnc. Tlio Itcmtnuton holds tlio
World's Clinuiploniililn fur MprcU.
TYl'KniimsiUjIOKKRNT. bvcond hunil ran-
clilnoi , all makes for n io. Tlio Crown Typewriter
wrlloJ cni'ltalaundHinull lotli'm , tlK'ires , Iriiolloni ,
PIC. , nnd in lliumou Hiiiikl. Cheap mar-ulna made.
I'rlc-o ir'M. btcnoKniphura supplies ol all kinds ,
bond forclrculars.
JOS. I * . H1EISEATBI ,
1C07 Furimm Stroo
DEWET < fc STOHE ,
A magnificent display of everything useful and ornamental in the
furniture maker's art at reasonable prices.
JAMES MORTON & SON ,
Telephone 437 , One door west of Postoffica , 1511 Dodge St.
ETCHINGS ,
ENGRAVINGS. ( fjTJIALLET & DAVIS
ARTIST SUPPLIES. " ® ! -jL ,
MOULDINGS , u a S.MUSIC.
PIANOS & OKG ANSjgji MUSIC.
1813 Douglas Street , Omaha , Nebraska.
WHEHPURGHASIHAFINESHOF ( ;
TltDtnafaialmusthetftiie
finest texture anilwlien
YjaW&V n
x * OSotn BYTIIC'C/
BEST TRADE THROUGHOUT THE
UNITED STATES.
SOMETHINE ; HEW.
tbli * M * itr adrer *
tfor * . Jtatueh Uf.
tu J ot two
ad ww *
'tinted tJ wtMloi jrtiri It litt
lalM U > w.ccrpwn and Uiuub
I Iceei Letutifully ecrAve < l (
TJtt tooirt&mt li M
VuUUu ty ! , full
iuuk tfniot ( t *
tAl nc ,
Heeltli is Wealth !
Jit. 15. 0. WIMT'B NKKVK AND HIIAIN
IIKNT , u guaiuntiicd HjiHclllo for Hyuterlu , DUzl *
nous , Couvulsloni ) , I'Its. NorvmiH KDiiralgln-
Jli'inliicho , Nurvoim 1'roitratlon cniiBcd l > y Ilia
use of alcohol or tolnicco , WiiKofnlitcM. Muntnl
DopiuHHloii. Bof ti'nluic of tlio Hrn.n , reuniting In
humility nnil Icadlngtij mlmiry. ilraur unddeutli.
IVt-mntiiro Old AKO. lliirri'iimiBH , I.ouHof Power
In nltlior ox , Iiivoliiiitiiry J.OHHUK uiul Hpermut *
on Inn canned by ovcr-oxertlou of tliolirulii.Bolf.
ubuso or ovn Indulgence. l'ft"li liox contolna
om > raontli'H treatnii-nt. ll.Oo n hov , or six boxes
forr . ( WBoutly mall pi epnlil ou receipt of prleo ,
WE GUARANTEE SIX BOXES
To euro any CR&O , With ench order rtcclro'J tiy
us for nix boxon , ncconipuulud with t'l.M. o wit
noiul thu ] iurclu r our wittten Kimrantoo to iu
fund tint monuy If the treiuinont dons not vttuo
a euro. UuuruuU'bi iMiiud only by Uoortnimi
Driltf Co. . DriiBulHts , JSolo Agentfl , 1IIU J'unium
street , Umaliu , Neb ,
ESTABLISHED I860.
Side HprlDK Attachment ; no Horse Motion.
MANUFACTURER.
First Class Carriages on hand.
also built to order. Repairs
Promptly Executed.
I
1409-1411 St. Omaha Neb
- Dodge . , , ,
ANSY PILLS !
! ' *
. /