Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922, April 21, 1889, Part II, Page 12, Image 12

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HAYWARD BROS. , 1515 Douglas-st. , Omah
i "I s& >
D a
Wo have nddod a new line of above
Roods , in line Calf. Hand Welt , in J3 , C ,
D and E lasts , at $5.00. They cannot bo
Full line Misbcs' anil Cihilds'
Spring llool Shoos.
Kangaroo Southern Ties.
This shoo has taken the place'of low
cut shoos , and is much cleaner and
more desirable. Wo shall offer a big
line of these goods from
62.60 to $5.00
this week.
' Men's Seamless Shoes cut from $2.60 to
Wo shall offer this -week an elegant
line of Mon'a KANGAROOS for
One lot of Genuine
Alligator Slippers
Wo shall offer at 82.00. These goods
"would bo cheap at $2.75.
[ Sights and Sounds of the South
Omaha Stook Yards.
The Hoc Yards on a Bu y Mbrninj ;
Through the Cattle Pens Mount
ed Dealers Welching Stock-
Personal Description.
The Iilvo Stoolc Market.
j VERY stranger in a large
city , ns a matter of course ,
, visits the stock or produce
exchange , andfrom the vis-
ra' gallery , gazing down
jupon the animated scone
-below , is told that the ex
cited men , the sound of whoso voices
produce a veritable Babel , are buying
and selling stocks , grain or provisions ,
nnd he goes away with his mind so in
delibly impressed with what ho has
iBoou that over after the mention of n
market will bring before his gaze the
contest of the bulls and bears "on
change' ' or in the provision pit.
Perhaps no ono who visits the live
'Block market at South Omaha for the
first time anticipates seeing a repetition
of the scenes in the New York stock
exchange or the Chicago provision
tnarkut , but ho has boon told that stock
la sold to live highest bidder and he may
xpeot to see a crowd of men actively
engaged in making bids for stock.
.Honco the question , so frequently asked
> 'ty strangers on entering the yards :
It- * "Whoro is the stock sold ? "
The answer is , "Everywhere in the
yards where a buyer and seller happen
to meet and agree on terms. " But still
there are ,
In the yards which , porhuns , bv com
mon consent , have como to be places of
rendo/.vous foi ; the buyers and sellers
When not engaged in looking at stock.
A btranger arrives at the yards nt 8
o'clock iti the morning , rather an early
hour for a pleasure trip , but if ho wore
< to wait until later the market would bo
over and nothing to see but long rowe
of empty pens. An ' obliging frlenu ,
familiar with the stock business , con
ducts him first to
for that Is usually the 11 rat to open.
Down ono alloy , up another , past a
itiumber of gates which must ho closed
ipguin nnd carefully hooked , around tin-
'other corner or two , hero-wo are among
B crowd of men who are pointed out M
the hog buyers und sellers. At this
eaidy hour they have hardly "gol
l/n / -down to business , " the forces are bofng
'fathered , everything is * being put in
ireadincss it is the lull preceding the
Salesmen Have looked over the hogc
Vrhieh they uro to sell , the buyers have
up the recoiuts ; all that is lack-
Egurcd a knowledge of the receipt !
find condition of the trade at eastern
-pplnta , A messuupor boy suddenly ap-
* penra , quietly bunds out n , dlsimtoli
'which Is as Quietly received , read nnd
Ducked away in an inside pocket , an as-
' lEtunt , who lias boon waiting at the
telegraph ofllcowhispers something in
4hoeurof another salesman , others nr
five and there are divers whispered
frords , nods , winks , and knowing looks
The Human understanding it
THE NEW STYLES ARE NOW READY. We are pleased to announce large arrivals of new
goods , fresh from the manufacturers. Our strong inducements are reliable goods and low prices.
For the Week , Beginning Tomorrow.
We Shall Offer Some Unparalleled Bargains on New Warranted Goods
We uro showing the bcstllne of Wuu-
honphnsls , on our own lusts , nt 83.CO ,
W.fiO and $6.00 , that cun bo produced
for the inonoy , and our $15.00 line is
equal to anyot the $7.00 linos.
Mail Orders Filled.
We Pay Postage.
Our line or Hamburg Cordovan Shoes
at $5.00 and $0.00 have gained a reputa
tion that wo are proud of. Wo have
many customers that got a full year's
wear out of the in , and wo can recall
dozens of customers that have worn
thorn nearly two years , and worn out
the second and third half sole.
Fine line of Kangaroos and a good
line of Seamless Calf Shoes at & ! .6U ,
$8.00 and 84.00.
Hand Turned. Size 8 to 10J , at 75c.
Worth $1.15
Every pair of Kangaroo Shoes wo
offer wo guarantee to bo genuine. Wo
have the cheaper grades of Dongola ,
that arc sold for Kangaroo in many in
stances , if you wish them.
Hand Turn Button , Kid or Goat , ! 55c.
Hand Turn Button , Kid or Goat , oOc.
Hand Turn , an elegant French Kid ,
at 9oc.
A Child's Iron Chid Sole Leather Too
and Heel at 60c , the bamo in Spring ,
Heel at 75c.
Mail Orders Filled.
We Pay Postage.
Misses and Children's Shoes.
Child's Kid nnd Goat Spring Heel ,
Warranted , $1.00.
Misses Grain , Button , 11 to 2 , $1.00.
Mibsos Kid , Button , 11 to 2 , $1.2-5.
Misses Goat. Button , 11 to U , SI.25.
These goods are 25c and 50c under
and the salesmen are being posted. At
the ringing of
a buyer quickly secludes himself in the
telephone box or house , which every
packer has located conveniently in the
yards , and hero receives his orders for
his morning's work. No ono would
imagine , from the disinterested look on
his face as ho reappears that upon him
devolves the responsibility of making
transactions during the coining hour
that would mean hundreds of dollars of
loss or gain to'his employer , as his
judgment might be good or bad , nor
could the shrewdest salesman detect
from that look what his orders have
boon. Perhaps his chief has said , "Buy
every hog you can got , as low
as you can , but buy the hogs , " or por-
haos ho has said : "Do not buy a hog
unless you can get a reduction of 10c
per hundred from yesterday's prices. "
It is nil the same to the buyer. Ho
stops out , cool and collected ; it would
not do to show eagerness , for
would at once detect that ho was anx
ious for the hogs , und would put up the
price on him ; nor docs the oxpcrionced
salesman show ovorlmsto. It is like
the fencing of skilled swordsmen before
coming to close blows.
"What have you got:1" : inquires a
buyer , and the salesman walks away
with him to show him the different
loads of hogs which ho has for sale.
The buyer looks them over , inquires
the price , buys them if it is satisfac
tory , if not , signifies what ho
would bo willing to pay for them , and
then goes with the next salesman at
hand. Meanwhile , the 11 rat salesman
looks up the other buyers and gets their
bid. In less time than it takes to de
scribe it the crowd of men who wore
waiting for the market to open has
molted away , and the stranger and hie
guide nro the only ones remaining.
But ono by ono the buyers and sellera
until Iho crowd has assumed its former
If the market is higher ana the buy
ers have shown a willingness to pay tl'ic
prices asked , perhaps u good proportion
ofnllthohogH in the yard have been
sold during the ilrst twenty minutes ,
but if the buyers have not wanted the
hogs very badly and have only boon
trying to "boar the market , " bidding
lower prices , perhaps no trading to
speak of has boon done. Then it is n
question of uorvo or stick-to-it-ivcness ,
eit or the saloomen must come down on
tbo.'nrloos asked or the buyers must
raise their bids und which one will give
in depends largely upon the opening ol
the eastern provihion market. If porli
ig reported higher , perhaps the buyers
will receive fiosh orders that will cause
them to raise their bids , but if lower ,
the salesmen will probably have to give
in nnd will sell to the buyers who made
them the best bids. Meanwhile there IE
nothing to db but to await the outcome ,
though buyers and Hollers mav bo
they show no signs of it but rather by
a cheerful look seek to smother the
fooling of responsibility. Jokes arc
freely exchanged , some of thorn pretty
hard ones , but there use in being
offended , the only recourse is to give
the tormentor a worse ono. and u shoul
BOOB up ns a good point is made. To
hoar thorn bno might think they were
all Bill Nyos and that each ono was
editing n Boomerang of his own.thougli
n very large percentage of the jokes arc
meaningless to one unacquainted witli
the men and not on the inside of the
Before you are hardly aware of U the
crowd IIUB dispersed , a buyer has ro <
ooivcd a frcBh order or there has been
soroo change in the situation , and the
buyers and sellers are again trying tc
iinnnhnnnil MO MvlAiu
; A
"These goods we have in four
grades , nnd nil widths from AA
We shall offer one lot of these nt
Thnt would be cheap nt gl.BO.
Kussett Oxfords.
Ladles' Hand-Turn Seamless
Russett Oxfords ,
$1.50 ,
$1.75 and $2,5O ,
and all grades up to the finest
French Coat
Bright Bed Oxfords.
Rnssett and Goat Shoes
5 to 8.
trade and are scattered through the
yards. If they do not succeed in mak
ing a trade the whole crowd wllH > e buck
again before long and the same or sim
ilar scenes will be re-enacted. But as
a general thing the hogs are all sold by
the middle of the forenoon.
After the trading is all over comes
UP ,
which is by no moans an uninteresting
feature of the mbrkot. The yards are
laid out on the same general plan as a
city ; the pens , whicli might bo likened
to factories and mercantile houses , are
built in blocks , and each pen opens into
a street , or alloy as it is always called ,
which runs at right angles throughout
the yards. As soon as a salesman has
sold put ho gives his assistant orders as
to whom the hogs are to bo weighed up
to and dircctlv the word "koy-oh. ' ' is
heard in the loudest voice the culler
can command , repeated again and
again until the key man ap
pears , unlocks the jrato of the pen and
turns the hogs out into the alleywhence
they are driven toward the scales.
Others are calling , "Koy-oh , " and soon
the alley is full of hogs , all moving
slowly on in Iho same direction , but
each load is kept separate. Every time
a load is weighed over the scales the
whole procession mo\es up a little fur
ther , until the bcalo house gate has
closed on the last load. When
Tin : iioas KMKHOB
from the scale house they are the prop
erty of the buyers , and are turned into
largo pens until they are wanted at tno
packing houses. As a rule the market
has barely closed before the droves pur
chased by the different packers nro on
the way to the slaughter house. To
one who has never soon more than the
fractional part of a hog , ay represented
by a pork tenderloin or a cased ham
hanging in the marketa thousand hogs
being driven along the alloy to the
packing houses is quite a surprising
Bight , and one that invariably brings
forth the remark : "What a lot of thorn ?
Whore do they nil come from , and
where nro they going:1" : When a thou
sand ho < rs scorn so many it is hard to
ruali/.o that a million and a quarter
hogs passed through that sumo alley
last year. But the market is closed and
the hog alloys are deserted.
While cattle are sold , weighed and
delivered to the buyer in the aamu general -
oral way as the nogs , still there are
Home points of special interest that uro
well worth a visit. The scone
is certainly more picturesque the
buyers and sellers uro mounted on
horses , as the distance around the yards
is too great to go on foot and then , ton ,
a great many of the cattle have no ro-
suuut for a man on foot and consider
him only a fit ornament to decorate the
tips of their horns , us several men have
found to their sorrow during the past
year. When there is a good demand
for cattle and everyone is buying freely
the eight is certainly very animated.
Mounted men are riding hero anu there ,
usually in couples , urging their Dorses
into a sharp trot , or even into a gallop ,
nnd droves of cattle uro being rushed
through the alloys , urged on by loud
shouts and cracking of whips.
To keep a cool head and make no mis
take amid nil this hurry and bustle re
quires u long experience and u general
adaptability to the business in hand.
Many of these men have followed the
buBiucas a life-time. They began when
Now York was tiie great live stock mar
ket , nnd , whou the center of the trade
moved to Albany , they went with it ,
und kept up with it in its westward
march , stopping successively at Buffalo ,
Chicago , nnd ut last at Oiimhu.
Some idea of the responsibility rest-
lag on these men may be guinea -from
the lact that ouo buyer ulouo lust week
They are not to be classed with the ordinary Wig warn , and rot-
comfort , style and wear they surpass all. We have them In four
colors : Plum , Tan , Brown and Wine.
Child's , 6 to 10 - 90C Buy a Pair
MissesMlto2 , - - 1.00 and Prove
Their Value.
' '
Ladies' and Boys' -
We have the Cheaper Wigwams , if you wish.
Ladies * Fancy Top Shoes made to order to
match any dress. .
Our line of Custom Misses' , Boys' , Youths' and Children's Shoes
have gained a big reputation , and are not to be classed with ordin
ary grain shoes , as they are not heavy and clumsy , but are aood fit
ting and Brood styles.
purchased over 4,000 head oi- cattle ,
which cost on an average about $45 per
bond , and all this had to bo donu , as it
were , on the spur of the moment , and
not ab ono buys a stock of met-chandise
or a piece of real estate with plenty of
time to oxumino all the points , and
weigh the pros and cons.
But the stranger came to the yards
with only an hour to spend. Two hours
have _ passed. Yet he hab had. only a
glimpse of the South Omaha block
market. A. C. DAVKXL'OHT.
A little church was lately dedicated at
Grovetown , On. , as a memorial to Paul il.
Hayne , tuo pontic poet whoso home was at
that place.
There are thirteen missions in Africa-0
British , 4 Gorman und a Frencb. Ono so
ciety , the Church Missionary ulonohus spent
$50l,000 in the last thirty years in East
It is rumored ubout that about the 1st of
Juno the i > opo will Issue uu Important
encyclical , wmch will bo annppoiU to the na
tions of Eurnua to settle the question of the
temporal power of the papacy.
Ono of the greatest hindrances to the gos
pel in Uoylon is said to bo "tho coquotunp
with Uuddhlsin which 1ms become fashion
able among the Europeans. " Buddha's
birthday is now u government holiday iu tuo
Work on the divinity building of the now
Catholic university uc Washington is pro
gressing iiiiely. Tlio work of plastering the
Interior walls was begun this week. The
spacious grounds uro being urtistioallv laid
out under the direction of a competent land
scape gardener.
The Kov. Dr. Lytnan Abbott has
answered the charge that ho la too liberal
by boldly declaring Ills belief in a D'irsonul
dovll. No shadowy evil Influence , no wicked
tendency in the human mind will do for him.
Ho believes In a Rolld , rail devil , who can be
seen and felt a dovll with a local habitation
and a namo.
In 1701 Yale college had but four or flvo
students who were church members ; to-day
ncaily one-half hold such membership.
Princeton iu 1S1J ! had but two or three professing -
fossing Christians ; now ono half of tuo stu
dents are members of churches , and utnont ?
them are numborcll the boat scholars. In
Williams college. 148 out of 18 , aud tfn
Amherst , -33 ! out of n.VJ , are members of
Viscount Mori , a well known Japanese
statesman , fell a victim to funntiuul vjolcuco
last month , at the ugo of forty-live years.
The viscount had no faith in the old Shinto
creeds of Japan , and two years ago ho en
tered the nhriiio of Iso with covered feet and
lifted n sacred curtain with his cane. Una
oi the fanatics who suw the action followed
the viscount around fur two years before ho
got an opportunity to\plunt'o u knlfo Iu his
back. , i
TnnimiK Bole-ijoither } by Kloctrlclty
A Swedish invonjflr lias applied the
alternating olectrlo current to a com
mercial problem so succasbfully thai ils
use bid * fair to revolutionise the tan
ning industry both-'in this country und
abroad. The process has boon in suc
cessful operation in'Swodcn for eighteen
months , and an experimental plnnt has
been established heije to demonstrate its
vuluo , as the ownoife of the patents in
this country are determined to verify
all olnitnod for the process before its
actual introduction. Patents uro hold
in BOVGiitoen different countries. By
the procohs it is claimed that faolo-
leuthor can bo tanned in BOO hours by
the application of un alternating cur
rent for one-eighth of the time , the old
methods requiring nix. months.
> '
The lafe Hov. Dr. Nathaniel Burton
of Hartford passionately loved a line
liorse. One day a hbrno dealer was
showing himJi thoroughbred. Ho apoko
of his powerful limbs , hundaomo head ,
broad chest , good color and rapid gait.
' 'The fact is , " auld the dealer , "tho
animal in absolutely perfect. " "Well ,
then , " baid the doctor , "I wish ho belonged -
longed to ray church. "
The First Love Affair of Winsome
Magglo Mitchell
"Twas the WmrttiR Brolce Her Heart
The PntliBtloTSulcirteora Vermont
Mnklnn Found Them in
Their Graves. .
lilttlc Romances.
The absolute diuorco granted to Mag
gie Mitchell , the popular actress , has
again set ugog the gossips touching
her first love affair , which has about it
the flavor of romance and adventure.
Away back in the sixties , when the war
was under way , Washington city was an
armed camp. The city then hrtd not
emerged from its old lethargy , and the
invasion of a great army in the midst
of its people , while it amazed those lethe
the manor born , gave thorn the first
full realization of wlmt genuine activity
and bustle meant. It was at thib period ,
too , that Maggie Mitchell , un actress ,
was at her best. Maggie loved a horse.
It was her w.ont before the him was
fairly up to dash out over the hills ,
then onrircled with forts and menacing
guns , and at n breakneck speed rush
holtor-sKoltor , to the nmu'/omont of
those less courageous. Many times
alone she scoured the beautiful out
skirts ; not always thus alone , however ,
for at limes it was observed that her
escort was a maply youth of sturdy ap
pearance and goodly features. Like
wise it was noticed that when together
speed was not so necessary , and rather
did they Jog along side by side , inter
ested both in cuuh other und the beau
ties of nature , bucn as autumnal Sep
tember can alone unfold. The dream
of love was iiwiikonod in each. The
climax came when , upon u return from
such a jaunt , Maggie , Hushed with
some excitement , miido a confident of
her mother. She almost shocked her
when , in girlish glee , she said :
' Mamma , I was married this morning. "
Troutintr it jocosely , her mother said :
"Wolll hope you have married a saint. "
"Ho in , " she added , and then in a
serious tone she gave the details. A
cloud overshadowed the mutcrnul
countenance. There was no longer
doubt. In n tone of command Magglo
was ordered to her loom. The very
overture of her matrimonial career was
the maledictions of the mother-in-law.
The air was surfeited with womanly
rage. In a condition fairly wild , the
groom was ordered away with injunc
tion to never addrebs his wife ugain ,
not even by so much us a look or token ,
Then Maggie became a prisonor.ulways
under the eye oi her mother by day
und by u cordon of her mother's friends
ut night the two lovers were kept apart.
Even in the marriage there was ro
Pivo miles away in the direction of
the north was the little town of Bla-
donsburg , mivdo historic bocuubo of its
duels and medicinal because of its Spa.
It HUB juttt an oaoy gallop to the bloopy
village. A mother's acquiescence was
only an incident , for would it not come
after the seat of man and wife had pro
nounced them one ? Thus it xvas that
Mugglo Mitholl , the then celebrated
protean actress , and William Vlr/jll /
Wallace , on the S27th day of September ,
60 oairs Ladies Hand Turn
Seamless Oxfords for this week
only ,
Worth $1.50.
Mail Orders Filled.
We Pay Postage.
175 pairs Ladies Hand Turn
Oxfords , Extra good value and
warranted not to rip , $1.40.
Plain apd Patent Tips.
Ladies fine
Imported Kid , Oxfords , Common
SeilSfi unci Opera lasts , Plain
and Patent Tips ,
j ladies'Ooze Calf Over Gaiters j
75 pair Ladies Kid Button
Shoes , equal to the $2.50 shoes.
A full line of the finer grades in
In all widths from AAA to EE.
We are notquoting prices on
cheap , inferior goods that are
not what you want , but are
quoting specials to introduce to
you our new spring goods.
18G2 , were joined in holy wedlock.
Thus it was that Maggie contracted hoi
first matrimonial alliance , which the
anger of a mother would not permit tc
be consummated and it never was.
A womnn sixty-four years old died n
few days ago in Purisaml her seve nty-
year-pld husband asked to bo allowed to
remain alone by the coffin for a while
before _ it was taken away. When
friends re-entered he was found lying
across it dead , with a half empty phial
of poison in his hand.
The joungest couple over married in
Ohio wore made man and wife rocontlj
at Keyscr , Monard county. Their names
are C'hloo Roland , aged thirteen , and
See Snow , fourteen. They have boon
sweethearts for four yea s , and after
frequent entreaties received parental
consent to marry. The bride was attired -
tired in a short dress.
A handsome man about twenty-four
years of ago walked back and forth on
the union depot platform the other
morning apparently in a highly excited
state of mind. Karly in the day he had
secured section 10 of the sleeper Iroquois -
quois , which was duo to leave for
Wichita at 0:28 o'clock. Just three
minutes before tlio signal was given for
departure the Wubtibh fast train from
St. Louis steamed into the depot. A
beautiful young lady stood on the plat
form of ono of the cars. She was
dressed in silk , protected by a stylish
flyaway cloak , and wore a hat with a
long white plume. She was a brunette
with sparkling brightoyos that sparkled
still brighter as they caught sight of
the young man. He rushed for
ward und assisted the new
comer to alight , escorting her
hurriedly to the west end of the
depot , where the sleeper was in wait
ing. As they entered the car a gentle
man dre&sed in block followed and wui
handed u document , presumably u mar
riage license. In the presence of rail
way employes the words were quickly
said that made the couple man and
wifo. The ceremony occupied loss than
a minute , and as the law of the state
does not require cither witnesses or
signature of friends to the marriage the names of the two who
wore thus strangely united were un
known to all except the clergyman
That individual dltmppuurod from tiio
cur into the crowd , und the train sped
away to the city of booms in south am
Kutibus , The countyrecorder is author
ity for the btutumo'nt that the parties
merit interallied in the ceremony wore
Lorenzo Hickman unU Kmma Jlickman ,
the former of Wichita , Kan. , and the
latter of Vigo county , Indiana. Al
though the young lady was not called
upon to change her name , it is stated
that no blood relationship exists be
tween the two. The recorder guys that
it was a runaway mutch , but ono that
promises to end happily.
Miss Dollo Majors , a lady thirty-three
years old , nnd well-known in St. Johns-
bury , Vt. , social circles , committed suicide -
cido the other day hoimiidu of disap
pointment , it is buid , in u love alTuir
with George Hidden , a Fulrbunka car
pet dealer. Miss Major * and Hidden
had boon acquaintances from childhood ,
uud the two vero parly engaged to bo
married. The match was confaidprod u
goo-Tone , and a vary thing was progress *
ing towards what wits hoped would bo
a happy marriage , when suddenly Hid
den broke oil the engagement. Not
long after he was married to another
woman , who died about two yearn ago.
Soon after the death of his wifeHidden
renewed his attentions to Mis * Majors ,
Finally last December they wore again
engaged to be married , und the date of
thuir union wtu fixed for boinu time in
January. Miss Majors wont to Kuime ,
K. II. , to visit ( rloudb und prepare hur
OUR $4.00
Ladies' Common Sense.
Long Vamp , no Sonm at Iho Bnck. An
Elegant Fitting nnd Wearing Shoo.
Widths , A , D , C , D and 13.
We shall offer for this week
only , an elegant line of Ladies'
Hand Turn Button Shoes for
$3 ,
Worth $4.5O.
Mai I Orders Filled.
We Pay Postage ,
Opera and Common Sense , lusts width
B , O , D and E ,
Shoo Dressing , 6c pot * Bottle.
Point House Slippers.
Kid , 3 point 60a
Dongola , 3 " 65o
Goat , 3 " 75o
Extra Kid , 3 " Wu )
"Dongola,3" $1.00
wedding outfit. Everything , even the
bridal veil , was ready. Suddenly , only
a few days before the appointed day for
the woddmg , Hidden , it is charged , in-
fo'-mcd her again that ho wished to delay -
lay the wedding. The shock , it is said ,
of a double postponement was too much
for the lady , and she ended her life by
taking drugs. _ _ _ _ _
Mrs. Annie Gardner , ngod thirty-two ,
was found dead in bed at Harrisvillo ,
Mich. , the other day. Five years ago
she was a happy wife and the mother of
two bright boys. She then lived with
her husband in Toronto. An estrange
ment occurred and one night the hus
band took the two boys and came to
Michigan. The distracted wife nnd
mother followed nnd after' a weary
bparch located him near Groonbush ,
six miles south of Harrisvillo , but hov
husband learned of her arrival nnd at
once fled to Saginaw , whore the two
boys died. The mother followed her
hubbancl to Snginaw , only to learn of
the death of her two boys and that the
father had buried them in an obsauro
spot. She , af.tor long search , found
their graves and had the remains exhumed -
humod nnd buried in a cemetery. Then
the heartbroken mother returned to
Ilarribvillo , where her story gained her
shelter and friends. Care and Borrow
had whitened her hair and her bowed
form seemed more like that of a porRon
far advanced in years than that of a
woman of her ago.
Another eloping couple flees to Milwaukee
nnd are niado ono. T lie Milwaukee minis
ters ought to make up a purse aud present it
to young Aubory of Chicago.
A mau In Milwaukee boa lately bean con-
vlutocl on the cimrgo of nutting sticks loaded
with Kunpowdor in his divorced wife' * wood *
pile. He wanted to get oven somehow.
A woman in Toledo , O. , sues for divorce
because her husband is n baseball crank.
We fear that such a particular woman as thin
would oven lind fuult with a "ppor , lone bar-
nuss iiiukcr.
A Live Onk , Pin , widow advertises as fol
lows : "YVunted , by a liuiiUsomo widow , a
husband. Must bo n man of good moral
standing ; not over forty years of ago ; nidus-
ti ions and temperate. "
Ho Is porfcctlysafo. Kov. Mr. Solinmor ,
n bachelor minister of Mercer , I'u. , say *
that when hi * congregation unanimously
picks out a youiiK ludy willing to bo his wifci
ho will taUo her for "butter or worse. "
YOUIIK Mis. Hosmur arrived In Sun Francis ,
co theothur evening from Los An'olosouhcr (
bridal tour. Shejlost her husbund somehow ,
nnd then went on an onormrus spree , /Inally /
landing In the station house. She eave bull
from a wall-filled purse , and wus tnlcon buck
to the hotel at 4 o'clock in the uiornltii.where
she was received with open arms bv bar him-
baud , who walil never a disagreeable word.
Ha wit > doubtless setting an example ( or the
regulation of her own future conduct.
"What a paradise this wilderness would
be , " Hays the Montrose ( CM. ) Messenger ,
"for a carload of corn fed girls from tlto
states. Wo know of more than four hundred
hauliolois ( u rouuh estlmuto ) , holding down
good ruuulicB In this valluy , who put In their
days with the crops In the lieldu nnd their
evenings sowing on buttons. And they uro
good follows , too ; men who would make any
nlcii , intelligent girl happy , if only given a
chunno. Wliv don't Homebody start a matrimonial
menial agency for the benefit of these gea-
tlemtin. "
Mack Cnrter , n son of Bill Carter , married
Tin k Phillips' daughter , und Tuak Phillips
manled UlUCartor's ' daughter , ntid Mill Car
lo r married Tuok Phillips' daughter. 111U
C.ulttr is thuioforcTuok Phillip * ' hon-ln-lnw
nnd f.ithor-lt-ltiw ! , and Tuck I'hllllim IM hU
futlier-ln-Jaw's son's fathnr-ln-lawwhile Hill
Curler's son's wife Is hid fathor-ln-law' *
ilniiKtiter. Now , If Tuck Phillips has a
daughter born to him nhe will bo Hill Cur
ler's fathcr-ln-law'H child and ut the sumo
tliuo his son.ln-huv's child. Hut the thing to
tell in wlmt relationship would exist between
the respective children of the three couples
in case they have children. Can any ono
Wisps of btraw by ttie nay scale * are bit
that UUYU fullcu by tuu weigh eido.