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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 4, 1887)
From Darkness to Light !
The Silver Moon shining out from the widows of heaven , gives light , hope and joy to a world
in darkness. So do the astounding revelations , commendations , te4timonials , praises
sworn evidence , happy results , speedy and permanent cures performed by the
famous Carbolic Smoke Ball
Tfte above cut is a good representa
tion of the genuine Carbolla Smoke
Hull , with Mir patent Smoke Emit
ter or Liberator attached.
A companion to the famous "Carbolic Smoke Ball" in the successful treatment
of Catarrh , Asthma , Hay Fever , Bronchitis and Ulccration of the Lungs. Also an
infallible compound for Liver , Spleen , Kidneys , Bladder , Malaria , Jaundice , . Dys
pepsia , Piles , Moth Patches , Complexion , Suppressed Menses , etc
No household should bo without these infallible remedies.
The price of the Carbolic Smoke Ball is $2.00. It has never boon less than this
price , and wo warn the public against any and all Smoke Balls which are offered
them for less than $3.00. There is only one Carbolic Smoke Ball manufactured in
the United States , viz : at Indianapolis , Indiana. Insist upon getting this Ball and
accept no other. I
10 Years Standing.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Co. :
I < have suffered with asthmas sixteen
years. Many times my life was despaired
pf. Physicians in Kaston , Pa. , Jersey
_ _ . . / , N. J. , and in Philadelphia treated
me , and , in fact , spent hundreds of dollars
lars ; found no relief. I have used your
nedicmo for over two months ; have not
bad ! an attack , and feel permanently
cured. You have my sincere thanks for
what your Smoke Ball and Debollator
has done for mo. PHILLIP C. KOPP ,
4351 North 20th street , St. Louis , Mo.
Sworn to before mo this 7th day of
February , 1887. A. A. PAYSON.
Notary Public. St. Louis , Mo.
Catarrh of 0 Years Stand ing Cured.
OMAHA , Nob. , May 11 , 1887.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Company Gen
tlemen : I bave been a constant sufferer
from catarrh for the lost five years. I
have tried many remedies that claimed a
sure cure , but received no benefit from
any of them. My head at times would
become so stopped up with mncons mat *
ter that it was impossible to breathe
through my nostrils. My sleep was also
broken by choking sensations caused by
the dropping of the mucous matter into
the throat. I first received a free test of
your Smoke Ball some throe months ago.
nnd was surprised to find that it cleared
my head in a few minutes and gave won
derful relief. I then purchased a ball.
Which I have been using since , and can
now say honestly and truthfully THAT
I AM ENTIRELY CURED. I sleep well
at night , have a good appetite aud feel
like a now man. Yours truly ,
NEWTON HALL ,
With Omaha Republican.
Subscribed in my presence and sworn
: to before me this llth day of May , 1887.
W. W. KEYSOH , Notary Public.
A PROMINENT CITIZEN RECOMMENDS TUB
Carbolic Smoke Ball Company Gen
tlemen : I have used your Carbolic
Smoke Ball for catarrh and throat
troubles , and can recommend it as a
pleasant and effective remedy. It is a
wnslble way of treating diseases of the
bead and throat. Yours truly ,
S. A. OUCHAKD ,
Wholesale nnd Retail Carpets , Cor. 10th
and Farnam streets.
A DISEASE THAT HAS BAFFLED THE SKILL
OK THE BEST PHYSICIANS CUKED UY TUJ2
USE OF CAUHOLIC SMOKE BALL.
OMAHA , Neb. . Sept. 1 , 1887.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Company Gentlemen -
tlomen : This is to certify that yonr Car
belie Smoke Ball has cured mo of Hay
Fever , a disease that has annually at
tacked mo for the last three years. The
attack generally came on about the tirst
of August , but this season it came about
the 25th of July , aud seemed to be moro
evoro than over. Breathing through
By nostrils was almost impossible , as the
asul passages appeared to be ontirolv
closed. My eyes were also badly in-
lamed , nnd my general health much im
paired. A friend advised ma to try the
Smoke Ball , and I immediately pro
cured ono and commenced using it. The
first application gave mo relief , and in
* less than a week all symptoms of the
! diMaso had disappeared. Yours truly ,
> CIIAS. P. POTT EH ,
Supt. Mo. Valley Sand & Gravel Co. ,
Board of Trade Building.
The only relief received was from hypo-
dormio injections of morphine the
Smoke Ball cured him. Road :
INDIANAPOLIS , May 19,1887.
Having been a sufferer for more than
Ooares .A.re ! Eernaein.erit. : :
CATARRH Cured In three monthi ; warranted. The "DobclUtot" should also
bo taken in cbronio cases.
ASTHMA Cored In nearly evnry case ; relieved In fire minutes , but tbo "Debol-
later Package" mart bo taken with the "Smoke Bali. "
HAY FEVER A cure guaranteed if taken in time. No symptoms of the dig.
case returning. The "Debellator Package" must bo taken In connection with the
BRONCHITIS Cured in every casoj warranted. The "Dcbollator" should bo
used with the "Smoko Ball. "
DEAFNESS Cured'in from three to six months if the drams of the ears are not
destroyed. Hot salt water used in Connection with special instructions.
KYES-f.ranulated lids , weakness of the optic nerves , etc. , cured In four to sir
weeks. Relieved in five minutes.
CROUP ttohavcd ID thrco minutes , and cured in twenty-four hours.
ULCERATION OF THE LUNQS Relieved in five minutes , and cured in one
week. The "Dobollator Package" must bo used in addition to "Smoko Ball. "
NEURALGIA Cured after the thkd dose , and it will not return If the remedy
is occasionally used.
SNORING Thrco doses each night , before retiring , cures this trouble * . _
DIPHTHERIA "Carbolic Smoko" destroys the germ of this disease , and shonld
bo given as a preventive.
COLD IN THE HEAD-Curcd in fifteen minutes.
COLD ON THE CHEST Cured iu twelve hours.
iwelvo years with that terrible disease ,
Asthma , which incapacitated me from
msincas , find causing much of the tima
untold suffering , I had tried many physi-
siaos and many remedies from special-
ati. Some of thorn gave mo momentary
relief , but soon it returned with moro
virolenco than ever. 1 finally had to ro-
sprt to morphine by hypodermic injeo-
ions so 03 to get some rest while under
ts influence. My breast and arms are
all scarred over from these injections ,
and I-was completely discouraged. Seo-
ng a circular from the Carbolic Smoke
Jail ollice. I called in to see what now
"humbug0 it was , and thought I would
bluff them by requiring a guarantee , and
it the same time making an offer of fl'OO
for a euro. They kindly informed mo
: hat they could euro me for $3 as well as
(100 ( , and offered a free test , which gave
mo relief. Yet I was not satisfied , but
called several times , and bought a Ball
and Dnbellator ; commenced using thorn
according to directions. This was in
September , 180. At that time , while
under treatment , I was engaged in shipping -
ping horses to Buffalo , and was greatly
exposed at night , but kept using the
Smoke Ball ; continued to improve , and
in November I was a cured man ; and
last winter I worked in the steam , heat
and cold , and have had no symptoms of
a return of the disease , and I certainly
feel grateful to the Carbolic Smoke Ball
[ or this miraculous restoration to health.
JAS. Li. KYTK , 200 Blake St.
Subscribed and sworn to before me
this 19th day of May , 1887.
[ Seal ] B. F. WITT. Notary Public.
Croup. Whooping Cough , etc. Whoop
ing Cough Cured in 48 Hours.
OJIAUA , Neb. , April 33. 1887.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Co. Gentlemen :
Some time ago you induced me to try
your Smoke Ball. At the time I had a
child suffering with a very bad whooping
oongh. He could hardly lie down , as It
brought on strangulation from the
phlegm , and in his efforts to throw off
this stringy phlegm he was constantly
vomiting his food as fast as taken in. I
made him inhale the smoke from the ball
three times for a day , and inside of 43
hours broke the cough up. From the
start the smoke altered the character of
the secretions ; they became loose and
easily thrown off in the form of matter ,
and the child recovered fully in a few
days. Since that I have used the Smoke
Ball in my family for all ordinary colds ,
for which it gives instant relief and a
speedy cure ; Respectfully , ozc. ,
D. B. BEEMEU ,
Commission Merchant , 801 , 803 , 805 , 807 ,
Subscribed in my presence and sworn
to before mo this 2Jd dav ' of April , 1887.
[ Seal ] W.'W. KKTSOB ,
A physician cures his child of croup witli
the Smoke Ball.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Co. , Indianapolis ,
Ind. : My little child one night had a
sovcro attack of croup. I used the Car
bolic Smoke Ball , which I always keep
iu my house , and it relieved it in a few
moments. It wont to sleep and slept
soundly. I have used it for many dis
eases , and from my own personal expe
rience I cau recommend it as wonderful
in its curative effects.
N. P. CAKTKB , M. D. ,
Maplotoii , Ind.
SORE TITUOAT AND COLDS.
OMAHA , Nob. , Jan. 8 , 1S87.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Co. Gentlemen :
I have nsed yonr Carbolic Smoke Ball for
colds and sore throat and find it to bo an
infallible remedy for such troubles.
Yours truly , DR. A. S.BILLINQS ,
Southeast corner Dodge and 15th Sts ,
Each Ball la inclosed in an individ
ual box , covered with our registered
label bearing note at lutnd.
A Great Family Medicine Headache
Colds.OMAHA , Deb. . Dec. 37,1888.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Co. Gentlemen :
Your valuable remedy , Carbolic Smoke ,
as applied through your Carbolic Smoke
5all , has been used in my family and
ias afforded immediate relief from head
ache , cold and catarrh. In fact , if prop
erly applied , I consider it a specific for
those complaints , and I believe it will
cure any disease of the mucous mem-
Drano that can bo reached by inhalation.
Yours truly , C. C. FOHBY ,
Trunk Manufacturer , 1490 Douglas St.
WHAT ONE SMOKE BALL ACCOMPLISHED IN
A MONTH !
Carbolic Smoke Ball Company Gen
tleman : This is to certify that I have
joen troubled with catarrh for the last
; hree years. I have used many remedies ,
jnt failed to receive relief from any of
them. The disease continued to grow
worse nntil it affected my voice very
much , and also caused the breath to
jocomo very offensive. I have been
using one of your Smoke Balls now fern
n month , and can notice A DECIDED
CHANGE IN MY CONDITION. My
throat has ceased to trouble me , my head
is perfectly clear , and 1 am satisfied that
I can obtain a cure from yonr remedy.
Yours tuuly , PHILIP MILLER ,
Barber 111 South 15th. Street.
Subscribed in my presence and sworn
to before me this 17th day of June A. U.
1887. CHARGES L.THOMAS.
A Remarkable Cure. The Smoke Ball
Saved Her Life. Mrs. C. A. Newman.
Cor. Cumings and 27th Sts. Omaha Says :
Carbolic Smoke Ball Co , Omaha , Neb.
Gentlemen : 1 take pleasure in recom
mending your remedy , the Carbolic
Srnoko Ball , for I believe it has saved my
life. I have been troubled for years
with what was considered to be an in
curable case of Catarrh. Have been
nndor treatment of several well known
physicians of Omaha , but could receive
no relief from them. My condition con
tinued to grow worse , until at last the
disease began to eat through the mem
branes of the nose and month , making
breath very offensive and causing sev
eral pieces of decayed bone to como from
my mouth , I had given up all hopes' of
over receiving a euro , but decided to try
your remedy for a relief. I not only re
ceived relief , but am happy to state that
I am entirely cured. I have been using
the remedy now for four months ; my
general health is much improved , and I
am satisfied that the Smoke Ball does
all that you claim for it.
Very Respectfully ,
MRS. C. A. NEWMAN ,
Res. Cor. 97th and Cnming streets.
W. L. Adam * , Esq. , Completely Cured of
Catarrh and Deafness Road :
ST. Louis. Mo.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Co. Gentlemen :
Catarrh attacked mo seven years ago.
My symptoms were those which are usu
ally characteristic of the disease , coupled
with that of Deafness. My hearing was
so impaired as to render it impossible to
hear any ordinary conversation. Thanks
to your Carbolic Smoke Ball , my catarrh
is cured , as well as my deaf ness. lean
hear the ticking of a watch.
W. L. ADAMS , 7037 S. Water St
Subscribed and sworn to before mo
this the 18th day of May , 1887.
WALTER C. CARB ,
fYlTl . . * O'flfir P T fl 11 rYPQ Over 11A South 15lh street , otic door south of the Postofflce ,
\ * / U.J. V/JJJ.V'Cs JL C4/JL JLVJJ. 0 areopen to the public from 8 a.m. to dp. IN.
Jj 3T6C JL GS t IB given all who will take the trouble to eall.
TUfo 41 Olrl . PVQ e comPlet ° treatment sent to any address on receipt of price 13 ,
* * * * Wi U.V3X O ana 4 ceuts postage. Smoke Ball $2 , Debellator 1. One complete
treatment generally sufficient for a cure.
Carbolic Smoke Ball Company
. Over 114 S. 15th St. , CCreighton Block , Omaha , Neb J
; FOR SALE BY ALL DRUGGISTS ;
A SORT OF HALF-WAY HOUSE
r l. .
B tween Birth and Paradise , Where Iowa
Methodists Most'bo Congregate.
THE CLEAR LAKE CAMPMEETINQS
A Splendid Place For Flirting Happy
Young Men arid Wrlght-EyoU
Beautiful OlrU A. Popular
" " "
A Readable and Kftoy better.
CLEAR LASK , la , August 31. ( .Corre
spondence of the DEE. ] To the Iowa
Methodists , Clear Lake is a tort of half
way house between earth and paradise
with this advantage in favor of the lake
that although yon have to go through
the disagreeable form of dying to reach
the last named place , nothing moro in
human than a jaunt over the Chicago ,
Minneapolis & St. Paul railroad and its
connecting lines , Hoc between the Metho
dist's earthly home and Clear Lake. It
is easy to understand the Methodists1
love for this beautiful freak of nature.
All through Juno and July that denomi
nation holds big camp-meetings on the
northwest shore of the lake , whore the
enthusiastic follower of John Wesley can
sing and shout and grow good twenty-
four hours in the day , seven days in the
week , and four weeks in tbo month.
Stern religion relaxes its grim features
ssianwbat hero. The pretty black-eyed
daughters of ttic church &ro very pensive
and solemn indeed , and say "Amen"
with as much gusto as their stiff-bearded
fathers , when they nro attending divine
service in the pavillion , and the hand
somest young man might ojrlo his oycs
out before he would receive a response
from beneath the lashes of the
charming worshippers at such a
time. But the wicked correspondent ,
whoso duty compels him to see every
thing , has been sadly shocked of lato.
And when the moon glistens on a million
white-capped waves , these same pretty ,
black-eyed Methodists can bo seen on
the beach stydying lunar and stellar
phenomena ( of which none are half so
bright us their own dear eyes ) , reclining
on the shoulders of the naughty young
man who ogled them. And never a
word do they say , you may believe , when
the young man's ' strong arms embr
dear mo , I really do hate to say the
word well , any way , it Is the last thing
people do when they become familiar
with thac frightful monster , Sin , about
which Pope writes so much. Handsome
young Methodist Indies are the same the
world over. The world sees them , and
their eyes are on their prayer-books.
But , you , gentle reader , you on whom
the down has hardly yet appeared , you
know that when the world does not see
them only the moon and yourself , aud
the invisible correspondent she can
look up into your eyes with a glance that
you could not resist if you were a million
times as strong , anil sliys in a voice
softer than th moonligHt : "Why , how
can 1 be your wife1 You haven't asked
me yet ! " If all the'susAondor ' buttons
you now owned or over did own , should
como off ; if a million red ants should
crawl up msido of your vesture and take a
million distinct and 'separate mouthfuls
from your none too''corpulent body , if
anything in fact , fvrlr teeming with
satanic attributes , so ; tospeak , should
happen to you , you Woultt not notice it.
That dear little MetfiodistT elrl has your
heart , and you are tbo happy to notice
anything elso. Pretty feoon there is
another Methodist hom'6 , and in the
course of years a lot of little Methodists
are climbing over yonr knees , or going
to Clear lake and getting married just
as you wore.
And the correspondent was for-onco
cognizant of an approaching marriage
which tie did not chronicle until the
But just now Clear Lake is pretty well
deserted. The musical jubilee , which
winds up the summer meetingswas over
long ago. Big-hearted Mr. Wobster.who
is seventy-two years old , and looks as if
he had been growing fat all the time
since ho was a good dual less than ono
minute old , runs the leading Methodist
boarding house. His place is sadly de
serted , and the dinner bell which was
wont -to call good Methodists to an
equally good dinner , is now silent. Only
down on the lake shorewhere the wicked
old sinners from Kansas City hold high
revels , is there any lifn. Even the few
piscatonaily inclined followers of
Wesley , who still remain in the cottages
on the camp grounds , go about in an
apologetic way , as if begging a universal
pardon for remaining in the town.
Next to its religious phase , the chief
characteristics of transient society here ,
is its oxclusivoness. All society here may
bo divided into two cliques , ono being
composed of Methodists , the other of
Kansas City people. Any ono who Is so
unfortunate as to be born outside of the
Methodist church or Kansas City will find
absolutely no social privileges here ,
Everybody knows what Methodists are ,
We need not farther speak of them in
this connection. There are very many ,
however , who are not so fortunate as to
be acquainted with the denizens of Kan
sas City , and a few words concerning this
second great clique in Clear Lake society
may not bo inappropriate.
Four or live years ago sotno resident o
that city of hogs and railroads and no
north polo , wishing to escape the fiery
tortures of an earthly shool , fled to Clear
Lake. Ho became enamoured of
the crystal water. the bcautifn
bays And beaches , and the en
circling fringe ot forest and white
canvass. Ho told his friends at home
how nappy ho was. The next year these
same friends came in swarraa. The richest -
est ono of them , a corpulent , good
natured fellow by thcnamootWhittaker ,
purchased the leading hotel , the "Lake
View , " , and christened it the "Kansas
City Villa. " This hotel is given up al
most entirely to
The outsider who enters the dining
room and modestly asks for a place at
the table is struck withtho , idea that ho
has accidentally stumbled into an ice
box , and hastily withdraws amid the
withering glances of 200 'scornful eyes.
A great deal of the land about the lake ,
which sells in places alongntho lake front
for | 20 per front foot , is beinjr bought by
these Kansas City people , who are erect
ing cottages. ] " "
The "bon ton1' society ot Kansas City ,
if indeed the term isi-not paradoxical ,
does not como to Clear ; Lake. It is that
class of people who are/.comfortably well
off financially , and must exorcise econ
omy during their vacation wanderings ,
who come here. The , beet table board
bore can bo had for $5 a week , and a
room can be bad for a dollar more.
There are no handsome cottages. Tbo
most expensive one did--not cost over
11,500 , and was built by four or five people
who united purses. There are no private
yachts , with the exception of the one ,
owned by N. P. Dodge , of Council Bluffs
who has a park of forty acres and the
finest place on the lake , on the side oppo
site the town. Row boats are let for
only 93 a week , and all the lake crafts
are owned by the two firms. Prices of
all commodities are exceedingly low.
Thus it is that the majority of these who
come hero are people of .limited means-
clerks , small shop-keepers , stenographers
and the like. Some of the Methodists
who como hero are wealthy , but tiiey
como strictly for the meetings , and ex
pend very litte money. Newspaper men
almost entirely shun the place , They
find it difficult to exercise that reckless
prodigality which is characteristic of
them. They absolutely can find nothing
on which to spend their money.
Another feature of the place is the en
tire absence of hotels. A hotel in the
town to accommodate runners and the
regular trafllo , is the only one within
tire miles of the lake. The Kansas
City villa and the Webster house
are only boarding houses. There
are scores of cottages , ton times the
number of tents , but no hotels as at
Spirit Lake. Formerly there was & great
railway between these two lakes. So
thoroughly did the Methodists and pea-
plo of Kansas City take possession of
Clear Lake , that very few others came
there , and Spirit Lake now leads its for
mer and exceeding beanttfnl rival infi
nitely in enterprise and the surround
ings that go to make an attractive sum
mer resort. Spirit Lake is now the great
resort for Omaha people. The absence
of style at Clear Lake is noticeable ,
A GENUINE DUDE ,
the first of the season , appeared on the
veranda oi the Kansas City villa recently.
Hta white ethonlal pants looked like In
fant balloons hung around bean poles.
His coat and vest were skin tight , while
the tiniest possible hat lay en coiichant
on a still smaller head. A Methodist
preacher , "who WAS unacquainted with
the geography of the country. " having
just arrived , and had wandered by acci
dent into the Kansas City villa , stared at
the sudden apparition in balloon panto
and parachute feet , and almost fell into
the lake. Then ho smiled grimly , show
ing with but ono or two
vacancies , a fiot of glittering teeth.
"By the ghost of the jumping
John Wesley , ' ' ho exclaimed , 'is that
the sort of things our meetings produce ? "
and ho took- the first train for homo dis
gusted. The boarders at the Villa
ubbod their dirty top boots npainst the
lalloon trousers , accidentally of course ,
, ml then wcro profuse in apologies
which did not servo to rcmuvo thn stains ,
iris jauntily swung their croquet mal-
ots around wtth apparent carelessness ,
o as to knock the tiny hat from the tiny
lead. Of course they were so extremely
orry that the dude was "weally sawwy
hat they had deemed an apowlegy
ecessawy , you knaw , " bnt for all that
is hat kept assuming moro and more
he appearance of a badly bnrncd grid-
lie cake. He made his debut at 10 o'clock ;
it 11 o'clock ho iled incontinently to hii
oom. When he next appeared , so
loarseiy was ho dressed the landlord
mistook him for ono of the roustabouts
who have charge of the boats , and in a
ighl royal way ordered him to bail out
ho big fishing scow at the end of the
) ior. The poor fellow was so much
tightened by the morning's oxpericnco
hat ho meekly obeyed.
Ho was the first and last of the Clear
ako dudus. It is against the moral law
jf the plaoo to wear ought but a llannol
hirt , while social astracism follows the
man who dares wear trousers that cost
moro than two dollars and n quarter.
o are speaking of masculine attire of
It is needless to say that Frank Bellow
if Now York , has about completed ar
rangements to spend his summers at
Clear lake. It will bo remembered that
Frank is the founder of a school whoso
does of masculine aitiro are not these
held by Oscar Wilde. At Clear lake ho
would find lots of sympathy in the mas
culine dross line.
THE BOAKDmOnOUSE TABLES.
Dosplt the low charges , the boarding
houses here sot an excellent table. Ono
hing that strikes the boarder as being a
title incongrous , is , the almost on tire
absence of tish as an article of diet at the
boarding house. I ngreo with Euphenia ,
in Rudder Gringo , that people who go
fishing are expected to occasionally ha vo
lometning to do with lish. But evidently
ho Clear Lake boarding house keeper
does not think so. Only once , during a
week's stay , did we have fish at our table ,
although the boarders were almost con-
tantly fishing with good success.
CLEAR LAKE FISH
are exceedingly delicate oatintr , and the
daintiest epicure would find in them his
ne plus ultra. They toll a story of a
Chicago gourmand with a cultivated
palate , who had heard of the delicacies
of Clear Lake fish. Early in the summer
" 10 came hero and stopped at the Kansas
Jity Villa. As luck would have it , fish
was served at his first meal. The deli
cate \vhlto and brown morsel placed before -
fore him , iloating in a little ocean of
sauoe , caused the water to run down th'e
corners of his mouth nntil the lake began
to rise perceptibly. He tasted. There
was something wrong about the flavor.
He called the attention of the waiter to
he fact that the fish tasted quite stale.
That functionary stared at him in amaze
ment. "That can hardly bo possible , "
io said at length , "for they were shipped
From Chicago only three days ago. " The
epicure hastened back to his homo by the
lake , where at least he could got fish
But so much is said and done at this
beautiful place that if it were all re
corded I doubt whether all the news-
pers in the world , not excepting the
RE , would bo able to hold the chroni
cles. As I finish , tbo moon is handing
just oycr Dodge's Point like a silver stud
in the bosom of the sky , and In the per
fectly smooth surface of the lake a mock
moon is rotlected , elongated in the water
till it spreads from shore to shore. The
sweetest tenor voice 1 ever heard sing-
n a tone so full and clear that oven n
quartette of enthusiastic hut somewhat
husky bass voices are unable to mar the
beautiful molody. From beneath a great
brimmed straw hat comes the sweetest
laugh in all the world , and I know that
the angel who rooms just across the hall
from me is out boating with that great
big yawp of a fellow from Kansas City
plague take him. How can she bo Imppy
with him ! And the intricacies of this
problem are so great that I throw down
my pen , and wonder that of a sudden
the moon seems so much less bright , and
that tenor voice sounds so much harsher.
Well , well ! Even newspaper correspon
dents have hearts like other people , and
BEE correspondents are about like the
rest of them , I guess. How can I throw
my heart into this article , when it is
away out in the center of the Inke.in pos
session of the prettiest little woman in
the world , and she only encumbered by
its possession ! Pshaw ! If my love for
BEE readers were not so much greater
than any other affection of mine , Iwould
feel badly over her indifference. A grea"
big tear drop has completely blotted on
my name , and so I will close this screed
with only the signature. S. T. H.
The Friends of England report a slight In
crease In membership the past year.
According to a London paper the New
Testament in Arabic is In demand In the land
The next church congress will be held In
Louisville , Ky. , from the iBth to the aist ot
Father Illordon , of Castle Garden , is solic
iting subscriptions to meet the constantly in
creasing wants ot his Immigrant mission.
The Catholics of Buffalo claim their mem
bers at W.OOO , out of a population of 5.r > o,000 ,
or more than one-third the whole number.
The officers of the Plymouth church , Brook
lyn , have not yet decided whether to make
a call for a permanent pastor or for a tem
The sixth annual Bautlst conerrss will be
hold In Indianapolis. November 15 to 17. The
first topic will bo "The Organic Union of
Dr. Do Costa , rector of the church ot St
John thn Kvaneullst anil leader or the \Ylilto
Cross urniy In this country , tins started on a
Hying visit to Europe.
ttov. J. V. Schotield. D. D. , after many
years of service In St. Louis , leaves on Sep
tember 1 to accept the pastorate of tbo High
street Uantlst church , les Molnes.
On the Slit of July the .Methodist Mission-
nry aoclety laid the corner stone of the tint
Protestant theological Hcmlnary to Mexico at
1'nfbla , "Tho City of the Ant'i'ls. "
> . The Cumberland 1're byterlan now have
2,510churchos and.a membership of nearly
one hundred and fifty thousand , and the pub
lication house at Nashville , Teen. , Is cted-
Itod with a clear prottt of 8 < MS9 for the past
The African Methodist Knlscopal church
proposes to celebrate the centenary ot IU or
ganization on some date In November next ,
hereafter to be decided upon , tbe order of ex
ercises to be fixed by each conference , quar
terly conference , and pastor and church.
According to official accounts It appear
that during the Ian yenr an persons wore
received Into the protest an t community In
Berlin , of which number eighty-eight wore
Jews , while there wcro 109 secessionists
from protestantism , seven of whom embraced
The report of the board ot Cathollo Indian
missions shows that there arn thirty-live
boarding schools and twenty day schools
conducted under tholr supervision , the pupils
of the former numbering 1,51)5 and at the hitter -
tor mo. The nmount alloted to these schools
by the United States government was 103-
The now Knglfoh church at Copenhagen Is
to b opened dnrlnc the approaching visit of
the Prince and Princess ot Wales , who have
taken a great Intercut In It , and contributed
very largely to Its adornment. The Interior
Is very ornate , and the reredos , font and pul
pit , which are of terra cott nil l > onlton
ware , are most artistic.
A number of English blzli churchmen and
Roman Catholics have arranged to set nut on
a pilgrimage to LlndUfnrni * , on the North
umbrian coast , to celebrate the twelf Hi cen
tury of the death of St. Cnthbert , the patron
saint of the country. The vlforlms will
travel barefooted for three miles over wet
sand , the men leading and the women fol
Mlchlean has a duck with four wings and
Last week a twenty-foot long shark was
found high aud dry ou the beack at bavin
Roctr , Conn. It is supposed to have been
tossed ashore during : tbo storm of the night
Jasper Caler , near Fabyan's , Mass. , has ono
of the rarest animals ever soon In the White
mountains. It is a whit * porcupine , a big
one , too , weighing twenty-live pounds , and
already so tame that it eats from its owner's
A foolish woman at Niagara Falls Insisted ,
In spite ot the objections of attendants on
taking her thrco-months-old child through
the Cave of tlio Wluds. When she came out
he child was dead , having been suffocated
> y the spray.
W. 11. Thomas , of Grand llaplds , has two
; reat curiosities in his house. In traveling
hrougli his rye Held he discovered a stalk of
ye surmounted by two perfect ears. On
iaturday last Ms wife presented him with
rlplcU , all girls , the combined welsht of
yhich was ton pounds and ten ounces. The
father , ns well as the mother and babies , is
A natural curiosity has been discovered at
Solothuru , Switzerland , the centre of n larce
watch manufacturing district. It Is the nest
of a wa tall , built wholly of long spiral steel
shavings , with the least part of vegetable or
animal libro used In Its construction. The
strcl shavings are half a millimeter thick nnd
tbout twelve centimeters long. The n&stjias
been preserved In the museum ot natural
A Virginia gentleman relates that while
fishing for chubs the other day ho saw a ter
rapin crawl Into a chub's bed , whore the
feruaie bad deposited her spawn , when the
male chub sighted the intruder , caught him
jy the tall , backed out about six feet , nnd
threw him ( the terrapin ) about twenty foot
clear ot the water. Tnis fact is vouched for
by several gentlemen of repute who wit
nessed the summary bouncing of the terra
An Ojrdonsbnrg newspaper says that some
of the citizens of the Fourth ward of that
town have for some time been annoyed by
tlielr cows coming home at night without
the usual amount of milk. They watched
their cows in the hopes of discovering the
offender , and they were successful , for they
saw a strange dog approach one of the cows
snd nib up against her legs. The cow put
her foot back , when the dog fiat upon his
haunches and sucked her dry. lie was as
Tat as a seal from the milk ho had been tak
AConway ( Mich. ) roosterthat Is equally
well provided with physical and moral cour
age not onlv had tbo backbone to climb into
a slcff hen's nest and linlsh her job of hatch
ing : nut a batch of fifteen chlcksbut has slnco
cared for them against nil corners. Including
a bin and ravenous hawk. The bird came
swooping down and had already seized ono
ot the chicks when the rooster discovered
lilm. With a savage scream ho sprang-upon
the hawk , sol/.od his neck with his billburied
Ills spurs deep in his shies , and belabored
lilm with bis wings until help came aud the
hawk was dispatched.
Loxo Onovn , In. , August 31. To the Ed
itor of the BEE : John llardle. of PI > mouth
county , formerly ot Scott county , Iowa , has
a blind mare that last aprlng gave birth to a
colt that Is almost as much dog as colt. The
thing has neither mane uor fore top , has a
tall exactly like a greyhound , long , ilunder ,
and turning up at the end ; has a lull set of
teeth like a dog and will eat meat. When
told to do so , it will run after nnd chase the
calves and chickens just as a doc would. In
other parts It appears to be moro colt thnn
anything else. It Is a very stranice nnd
wonderful freak of nature. M. O.
A stranre bequest aud a strange house
hold pet , says tha American Urore , was that
which my friend's father received trom bis
grandmother. It was a land turtle that she
had cared for and petted for forty yenrs.
It had the range of the bouse , answered to
Its name , Dan , would como after its food
and cat out of tiand. When ready to take
bis long winter sleep Dan would peck at the
bureau , when his mistress would wrap him
In uannels and tuck him away In a drawer ,
where he remained dormant until spring.
Dan lived Ilvo years with the legatee , and
when he died an alligator took Its placo.
The latter thrives and Is as tenderly cared
for as a pet canary or Scotch terrier would bo
Highland , N. Y. , Aueiist 27. Living near
this vlllak'o Is a family named Booth , nil the
members of which are blind. Two of the
family , a brother and sister , are deaf a * well
as blind. Having been educated at an Insti
tute for the blind they are highly accom
plished In many ways , particularly so in
music , and ono of the brothers , who has a line
tepor voice. Is an Inimitable mltnlc. Young
Booth while on his way to 1'oiuhkeepslo , on
boftrd the ferryboat Douality. the other day ,
was introduced by some of the passengers to
give his "thunder storm" selection. Thun
der storms have been of a daily occurrence of
late bore , and when the portentloua rumbling
sounds reached the captain's enr who , by
the wny , Is no beardless youth ho ran to his
headquarters on the main deck to get a roll
of canvas used for covering n portion of the
deck during a rain storm. When the captain
staggered back under his heavy load , he was
greeted by a shout ot laughter from the pas
The ordinary gambler isn't much on decor
atlve art , although It may be said that be is
Interested in Jack pottery.
The "moiling schoolboy" Is beginning to
draw down the corners of his mouth at the
Idea of going to school next week.
Fireman , to foreman Wh ° re shall I play
the hosa first ? Foreman 1'Iay It on the
night watchman until you wake Him up.
w Mr. Jones of St Pau I , Minnesota , has had
the blood of a live lamb Introduced Into his
veins , lie Is now ripe for Wall street.
The man who left homo to spend the sum
mer with his family ha * just returned. The
summer Is not yet spent , but his money is ,
An exchange asks thn question how to
prevent tha pollution of water. One ot thn
best remedies known Is to keep whisky out
and drink It clear.
There is a man Iu Phtsburg named Wbe-
lau who lives on crude petroleum. He Is the
only rival the Standard Oil company has not
A muzzled dog trotting down the street ,
attracted the attention of a five year old. who
observed , "Oosh , mother , that aos'a got bis
bustle ou the wrong end.
Although tobacco has gonoun. a five-cent
cigar is still sold for n nickel. The relations
between tobacco and n live-cent cigar is not
close enough to hurt cither.
It is probably untrue that Jay Cuuld clips
off his coupons with his lawu mower. Ho
keeps Ills bond * In a water main and hlu
coupons lloat oil into a tank.
A littlu eWa father has a round bald spot.
Kissing him at bedtime not long ago , she
said : ' 'Stoop down , popsy dear. Iwautto
klsd the place whcro the lining shows. "
The best Imitation of the song ot the bobo
link Is bv the waiter girl when she says
without taking breath : "Liver steak-cold-
roast - cold - corned - egus-ham-lamb-and
Phrenology wan once quite a science , bnt
In these days of swelled heads , sore heads ,
dead beads , and block heads , tu phieaolo-
gist's pnwrrs have proved taadoauate to thl
necessities. . ' ' \ ,
1 ho real estate crate In Southern Callre * *
nl.i has oven demoralized the doctors , in
wrltlns a prescription recently one ft thflitt
added this direction : ' -rake one-third dowii
and the remainder In ono and two yews , so *
cured by mortgage. " 4
Can you spixro a trifle for a poor bllml
man ? " -Why , hang Itjuan , you Joof ' Ij
you could see first ratol" "Oh , certainly. 1
am only bogging In place of my blind friendf
who has no time for Himself , ns his aaughton
Is getting married to-day. " _
In an advertisement by a railway company
of some uncalled for goods , the letter l
had boon dropped from the word lawful , anil
it read : "People to whom those package *
are directed are requested to come fof ward
and pny the awful euargea on the saran. "
Mr. Spurgeon says : "A wild goose never
lays a tame egg. " No , It never dow ; but thd
pgr will become tame , Mr. Snurnon , If you
keep It long enough. Tame ? l" lj' l. "If ?
Insipid. Anrt after that It will begin to.
grow wild ngaln ; wilder tlmnevor ; FO wild
that Its own mother wouldn't recognize It.
8he wouldn't w nt to ; she would want ttf
disown it as unfit for any use save to attend *
uu popu lar lectures.
UONET POH X1IE ljAD1133.
Kew Jackets are mucli braided.
Strings again appear on bonnets.
The newest red Is old. rose.
Corsages nro still to bo exceedingly varied.
We are to have another season of check *
A buckle with n glove buttoner attached 14
Gobelin blue is tbo fashionable , corullan
tint this fall.
flonlton lace wilt bo In highest fashion for
Dots , big nnd little , appear on Rome of thrf
new fall fabrics.
Bengnllnes como In soft , dull finish , with. ;
large reps this season. t
All shades of yellow nro used to brighten
the effect ot dark fabrics.
Diversity will be the prevailing charac
teristic of autumn fashions.
Jackets have close coat sleeves , with buttons - * , >
tons and buttonholes at the wrist . * f -
Next winter will be emphatically n "silk' *
as distinguished from a "woolen" season.
Now hats in felt or beaver or hatter's plusli
come in all the new dark and light colors.
White wool costumes nro tbo lavorltoT
wear In the country for the month of Sop-
Hairpins of massive gold , with a substan
tial cold ring dangling from the upper end ,
Ashes of roses Is revived amonc thd
now uray tints and takes the nameof Mai-
The pulled sleeves have had their brief ;
day. Straight sleeves will rule during tha
fall and winter.
The hideous fashion of rasso terre sklrta
scraping the street pavements In the baclc
threatens to return.
The new felt bonnets are so soft that the
fabric Is made up In pleats over a frame Just
like plush or velvet ,
There is a vcrv small smelling bottla
shown , havlne a golden chain , by which It W
attached to the bracelet.
Xlgrac stripes , bars nnd checks In vanishIng -
Ing effects appear on the new fomih and
wooly cloths for fall wear.
The favorlto colors In straight , upright
feathers on round hats are old rose , brouzo
green , and almond shades.
"Pinking" will come In nealn with a grand
rush. It will bo applied to n variety of ma
terials and nil sorts of garmsnts.
Blown glass beads and pearls r.ro certain
to be among the mast fashionable of dress
trimmings during the fall and winter.
The tailor gown relegated to Its proper
place this season , being the suit of morning ,
not afternoon wear , for utility , not dress oc
"Well , Mary , how do you like your new
place ? " "I can't tell yet , positively ; you f
know the first day the ladles nro nil politoJ
ness Itself. " T >
Girdles of ropes of beads of passamonterle' .
nnd ot seal and plush are to replace these ot
metal saddle elrili and leather that have been
worn this summer.
Dressmakers who pleat nnd gather a quant
ity of stuff about the dress wearer's lieuro
nro not following the beat models. Simplic
ity will rule next winter.
Homely lady , seated In front , remarks
mentnllv Professional beauty Is she ? I
wouldn't stand there to be admired bv the
men , not for all the world. ' %
Double-breasted. looie-front jackets or
eoata are shown for rough-weather wear.
Tiiey are loose aud comfortable , but sat In
well to the figure In the back.
Some of the women at Saratoga during
the past season changed the colored ribbons
about their pug dogs * neck twice a week.
Life with them has lofty alms.
A fashion writer says thn next generation
or two ot women will abolish corsets. Tney
will have to , or thn next generation of cor
sets or two will abolish women.
Straight , upright feathers , mostly the
wing and tall quills of the domestic fowl ,
are considered the most stylish decoration for
French nnd English rouud hats.
In the same pew In a church at Dm Molties
sit each Sabbath day two women one of
whom Is the widow of four ministers , the
other the widow ot three ministers.
New woolen black novelties bavn bars ,
dots , corded , and plush and velvet effects ou
diagonal , rep , conhmuro woven , chovion ,
herring bone , nnd diagonal grounds.
The day has come for rubles they nra
popular. Brunettes nnd rubies will bo Jn
the nscendant for thin season at least.
Blondes rnuat resign their lead temporarily.
Mrs. Ooff , of Pleasant Valley. Wls. , who
was elected town treasurer , has just secured
her office In spite of vigorous opposition on
the part ol the male olllcc-holders of tha
Corsages are as long as ever , cut shorter
on the hips , with longer points In front and
narrower postilions on the back , narrower
waistcoats , and fuller draperies nnd trim-
minis ou the bodice.
In tailor made gowns smooth surfaced
clothes will 5tllt be used for dies-ty suits , two
mardedly contrasting colors Iu one costume ,
the lighter color for lower skirt and vest , tlia
the daikcr for the basque and drapery.
"What 1 dislike about the hotels. " said
Miss Culture , "Is their eroKarlousness. "
"Well , " re.spondcd the Chicago maiden , W
rather bowlldorwl , 'thoso fancy puddings - \
niverdld nroo with mo cither. "
Housewife to new domestic There Is ono
thing 1 wish to gay to you. The last girl had
n habit of coming Into the parlor and plavlng
on thn piano whenever she felt like It. You
nevorplav the piano , do you ? ' 'No. mum.
Hut Ol think Oi cud learn wld n little .show -
In' from you. "
lUnton seems to bo the paradl.se for female
gamblers. At oue of the bucket shops pit-
rn n lied by thn fair sex over a hundrnd ladles
canlbeseen dally gesticulating wildly , witn
cheer , neb or laugh , as the case may bo , nnd
occasionally also fainting the lust resort of
Short velvet Jackets , madn after the Rus
sian fashion , with silk facings mid a pro
fusion of silk braldintr. are among the Im
ported novelties. Then them are ones made
In Hi" Austrian way , teaching only half
wav to thn waist , aud completed by a full
putfof silk , which also extends up tbe front
to form n vosL
Fashion In husbands changes same ns II
does in everything else. A spell aeo ho had
to bo n coachman to bo nu fait. Now It H
necessary for him to bo n Mongolian In order
to be In style. Soon the windows of Chi
nese laundries will bo BO dirkunrd l > r fash
ionable girls In Hoarch of husbands that will
bo necessary to light the gas so that work can
Very short mantles are to be worn this
fall , especially bj young ladles , and tiion
there arn many of half lengths , the front
tabs reaching ns far as the knuo. Thn long
iniutlus nro entirely Ignored , and the hacks
nra invariably mnde short and pleated , nnd
slashed so an to set well OVIT the extended
tornures and hustles which nro still dic
tated ns proper by Dame Fashion.
The reckless , idlotlo display of good
clothes nnd jewelry by tlm "no-v peonlo"
who overrun the watering places has had its
own defeat , and has done a world ot good In
IU way. The most fashionable u onion seem
to have formnd an Informal alliance. Here
after n half dozen costumes will carry n
well-bred woman through a bcaKon at any ot
the prominent resorts or the minor places.
Ho Then you love inoi Shu I do. Ho
And I may speak to your pa ? She No'
Speak to ma. Pa ain't anybody iu this
A domestic difficulty in PiirUIan hi li s
life : Marquis Are you not the mother
of my children , madiunt Marchiouess
Some of them , sir.
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