THE OMAHA DAILY BEE : SUNDAY. SEPTEMBER 10. 18H6. T\VELYE PAGES ,
THE MATRIMONIAL BUREAU ,
CeasonaMo Information on a Heartfelt
Subject.
"TOO SWEET FOR ANYTHING. "
Tlio Cost or ti "Modest Protestant
AVcdtllns" Atlnclnncnt Notes In
Other Cliurclins .Motto fern
n WcddliiB King. ,
The Motto In a Wedding King.
lt/irj > fr' ll'tth/j/ / / .
A lover etivc thf > weddlnsc ring
Into ( lie ifolilsmltli's liuiid.
"Orax-o me , " ho s.ild , "a toiulcr tliought
Within tills icnlden band. "
The KoUlKttiHli graved ,
With ciiH'ful : itl :
"Till Death us part , "
Tim npildlnit bclU rane clndly out ,
Tlio luislninil said : "O wifi1.
Together wo will share the uriof ,
Tlio happiness of life.
1 ItUl ! tO til CO
Mv hand , my heart ,
Till Death us part. "
'Twos slio that lifted now hla hand
(0 ( lovo. that this should bo ! )
Tlien on It placed the coldcn band ,
And whispered tenderly :
"Till Death us join ,
Lo , thou art mine
Audi am thlnol
"And when Death loins wo never more
Shall know an aclilnz heart ;
TJio bridal of that better love
Death lias no power to pntU
That troth will bo
For thee nnd mo
Eturnlty. "
Sn up tlm hill nnd down tlio hill ,
Through fifty r.tmir-'ini ; years ,
They shared each other's happiness ,
They dried each othur'6 tears.
Alas ! A Ins !
That Death's cold dart
Such love can parti
lint ono sad dav she stood alone
liesltle his narrow bed ;
Shu drew the iliiL' from elf her hand ,
And to tlio goldsmith said :
"O man , who graved
With careful art ,
'Till Death us part , '
"Now 'grave ' four other words tor mo :
Till Death us join. ' " He took
ThiMirecloiis uoluea hand nnco more ,
With solemn , wistful look ,
And wrought with care ,
For love , not coin :
"Till Death us join. "
Whnt It Costs to Getatnrrlcil.
The PiUsburg Times Is in receipt of a
communication traced in n woman's
hand on blue linen note signed "J. M.
E. " inquiring timidly what is tliooxponso
of a modest Protestant church wedding ,
including minister's and organist's fees ,
heating and lighting church , and any
other expense which may pertain to the
occasion , omitting Moral decorations ,
The Time.- took the liberty of extend-
IngJ. JSI. E.'s important and evidently
heartfelt inquiry. J. M. K. may bo en
gaged to a modest Protestant now , but
fiho may not marry him. To save the
troublu of a roinqniry into the case J. M.
should marry some ono olso. The Times
lias obtained information as to the cost of
nearly every kind of civilized wedding ,
modest and otherwise. .For example , tlio
nemo of magnificence in the mutter of
Protestant woddincs is undoubtedly ono
in Westminster Abbey , where the tecs of
the canon , etc. , foot up from § 100 to 500.
Tills is the most rcmnnnrativo wedding
fora modest I'rotestnnt bet of churchmen
that J.M.E.'s intended could safely invest
in. On the other hand , the pastor of ono
of Pittsbnrg's most fashionable ehurchos
furnishes an instance of as profitless a
ono. "I shan't locate the story , " said
lie , "for it would hurt the best man's
feelings to have it known. The best man
cnmo to mo aftor-a wending , at wliich I
Imd received no fco , and said : "I never
iumdod you that , did L ? Well , the truth
is , the groom gave mo the envelope for
yon , and 1 had a preso.U use for the
money , and so , an I didn't hand it to
yon , ' Ho never has since , " said the
minister. "It was quite a remarkable
case of a forced loan , wasn't it ? "
As for a direct answer to J. M. E.'s
questioning a leading Baptist minister
made the most appreciative response
with figures , which may bo arranged in
the following table :
Organist . - . 515
Bcxton 10
> llnlbtor 10
AVfclto satin ribbon ( to Uoop the crowd
from running over the bridal party ) . . . . 10
Carriages 15
Flowers 15
Total for modest Protestant church wed
ding. . . . , .if. $75
All thcso arc figures of moro respecta
bility. For instance , the minister's fee is
often much larger. ThoKov. Dr. John
Hull , the swell Presbyterian pastor of
Nuw York , is said r.ovor to have boon
011'orod less than $50 by a marrying mem
ber of his congregation , while the honor
arium was ottcn § 100. Again , if ono
should take up the time of a great musi
cian , who was also the organist of n fash-
ionalilo church , with the performance of
hackneyed church music , ho could hardly
apologize witli Jess than ? T > 0. In fact , it
is said that the organist of 5t. Stephen's ,
Philadelphia , David D. Wood , has it in
his contract that no ono slinll play the
organ in that church without his consent ,
niul at weddings ho charges $50 for that
performance. The matter of flowers
once moro is very modestly stated in the
table. A florist furnishes another table
onjthls subject ,
For church nud house , according to
elaborateness of decoration , $10 , $25. $50 ,
$7f > und upward.
Good decorations for church and house ,
$25 oaoh edifice.
Flowers for bride , $3 to 7 ; for brides
maids. $ a to ! ? 5.
J. M. E , need probably have no fear as
to any expense in the matter of heating
and lighting the church of a representa
tive Episcopal parish. Said a clergyman
of that denomination : "Our cliurclica
nro always open , and wo oncouraeo
church marriages. In fact , there is no
charge for marriago. If , in addition to
the performance of the ceremony , the
organist aim bell ringer are wanted , of
course that is u dillbront question. It may
bu said parenthetically that bell-ringers
generally expect $10 for thnlr services. "
On the sumo subject a U. P. pastor said :
"No , I have never known of a eliurgo
being made by trustees for the use oFa
building in which a marriage took place ,
1 can't say I approve of church mar-
rwgos , however. 1 believe in marriage
ceremony being performed in the homo
as well as death and baptismal services ,
Homes should have as many associations
us can bo given them , ana not bo , as so
often they are in this country , mere dor
mitories/1
Jf J. M , E. marries a Hebrew she will
probably havu a loss expensive wadding
in thu matter of church fees than it ho
wore a modest Protestant. This is sim <
lily because very few Hebrew coromon
iei are performed in the synagogue. The
rabbi of ono of thu synagogues furnished
tills information ; "Our usual fees for
the rabbi are , $10 , for the sexton $3 , nnd
tlio organist ? 5 to $10 ; but there are very
low weddings in the synagogue , " Again ,
if J. M. JO.'a final choieu 13 a Roman
Catholic fihu may very likely escape the
Bexton's fees. In the Catholic church
iimrriugo Is n saoramont. There is no
chartjojlnit an oHurlng.and when a grand
Bcrvico is desired it as usual to pay the
organist and boxton. As for the offering
it varies from $5 to 110 or $15 , the largest
cfleu coming from the people from whom
the smallest is expected , and , of course ,
yjiuj versa ,
Hut if J. M. K. should move out of town
nd marry elsewhere thcso figures will
J > e valuable to her : Ou the Pacific coast
the fees to Unitarian clergyman run
from $10 to $10 , In New York the $ ame ;
while in the interior of Illinois they nro
from $1 to $3.
Afpicstion which J. SI. K. omitted to
ask , for the reason pcrhap * , that as the
oxpmiso will fall in any event on parent * ,
it is just as well for thorn to bo kept in
ignorance , is , What is the coit of the
usual adjunct to the clnirch wedding
Iho breakfast ? A caterer who is an au
thority , says : "Tho caterers will not
charge more than Sl.fiO or $ . ! a head tor
the usual collation. Of course , If thorc is
wino it is diliorent ? 3 to ? 5 apiece at
least. "
The Dourest Gift.
Amid the costly brlc-a-brac
Proofs , etchings vases statues tall
1 snw wlioio should have liuiu n plaque
A twelve-font ladder on the wnlK
With dainty bows 'twr s covered o'er ,
In modern decorative way ;
And in the light It jjllttrrcd , for
Tlio sides and mints with tfllt were gay.
1 valuothat above the rest ,
The nuwly-innrili'il ! > ald , In ulco ,
For down those Minus , with throbbing
breast ,
Ono illicit a maiden cnmeto mo ,
And after wo were safely wed
Her parents sent tin1 ladder hero
"Uur wedding-gift" 'twas all they said ,
'And now wo hold It very dear.
The Problem of Marriage ,
Western Rural : There is n class of
people that is trroatly worried about the
operation of tlio divorce laws ; and there
has been a society organized to make it
moro dilliciilt to obtain divorces and to
make the laws upon the subject the same
in all the states. Undorlyinc the move
ment is the belief that divorce , except for
one cause Is unscriptural , and henno with
many the movement partakes of a re
ligious character. With such people the
object , of course , is that our laws shall
not conflict with the divine Jaws , lint ,
more generally , perhaps the purpose is
to put a stop to what is regarded as a
great social evil. The rather indefinite
aim is to make marriage moro generally
happy , and thus throw protection about
the lioniti. All who have the welfare of
the homo and of society at heart must la
ment the activity of the divorce courts.
But the courts are not she cause. Tlioy
are an oll'ect. Wo might shut thorn up ,
and , though , by thus briniring men and
women face to face with" the fact that
when they promise each other to.stick for
life it is 11 promise that is binding , wo
might lead them to bo a great deal moro
careful about their intercourse with cacn
other , wo .should not insure happy mar
riages. Beginnintr at the divorce court is
not tlio place to begin tlio reform of the
nvil which wo are trying to reform.
Pliuro is no objection at all of smashing
the court. Upon the whole we believe
society would bo hotter off if divorce wore
impossible , thougji there may bo two
sides to the question. Hut until wo can
get some sense into the heads of men and
women who fall in love wo shall fail of
our real purpose.
A young man and young woman fall
in love and so do old men and old
women for that matter , anil the last ray
of good common sense fades into noth
ingness. In the majority of cases they at
once become irrepressible iiiiots. They
are _ utterly inapproachable with reason.
Kvidoneo us clear as the sun at noonday
against their limes ? for each other only
makes thorn love the harder and talk the
softer. They are each perfect in the
other's sight , and the only thing ontsido
of the burning , all-consuming sentiment
in their lioarta that ever engrosses their
thought for tv moment is the improbabil
ity that human nattiro will over again
roach such marvelous perfection as each
exhibits to the other. In time the wed
ding day camcsand goes , and with its
going comes the stern reality of things.
Gradually , as the faults inseparable from
human nature begin to creep out , a rude
change comes to their dreams , and it may
continue to work until thcro is only about
ono thing upon which they agree , and
that is that both Jjavo made unmitigated
fools of themselves. Divorce court or no
divorce court that agreement will bo
reached , and the future amity of the fam
ily will altogether depend upon whether
or not they continue to bo fools or turn
about and oxcrciso good judgment.
Now wo confess that wo do not clearly
BOO how the ditliculty is to be avoided as
long as human nature is what it is. What
is needed is to impress men and women
with the solemn fact that there it a vast
deal about courtship and nuirri'a'ge be
sides sentiment. Matrimony is one of the
most imuortant business matters with
which people have anything to do. Wo
can bettor ailbrd to make n mistake in
almost any other direction , and before
the important step is taken Iho heart
ought to bo kept down and the mind
awake until tlio most scrutinizing in
vestigation is made of the character , dis
position , habits , etc.and it would bo well
for each party to begin to investigate
himself or herself before giving much
attention to the other partv. The worst
fraud ever practiced in this"world is fern
n man or woman who is utterly unlit to
bo husband or wife to palm themselves
off on somebody with all their defects.
It is a clear swindle. Thorp ought to be
no dilliculty in people finding out what
their own fitness for matrimony is , for
people do not fall in love with themselves
to an extent that utterly blinds them to
their imperfections.
Tlio Sweetest Time for Courting.
Albany Argun ,
' 'I Is pleasant to sit by the parlor stove.
When the coal Is brightly glowlne ,
On a winter nl ht with your own trua love ,
While tliolierco northeaster's blowing.
IJut picasantcr far Is Iho summer night ,
When the dew Is on the rose.s ,
And fair Diana's silvery IkMt
A beauteous scene discloses.
Oh. then to wander throush the crovo ,
\vlicro \ the breeze with balm Is laden ,
And sotily tell the tale ot love
To a fair and gentle maiden 1
Oh. the soft , tlio balmy summer night ,
When katydids are suortlnir ,
And wo see the ilro-lllos flaslifnir bright.
Is the swot-test time for courting.
Marrying In Haste and Secretly.
Now York Sun ; The course taken by
Airs. Victoria Scholling in running away
from her husband is a very logical con
sequence of such a marriage as hers.
She was an undiitifnl daughter , and now
she proves to bo an untrustworthy wife.
Slio is as careless of her responsibilities
as a wife us she was indilleront to her
obligations as a child ,
Her offense did not consist in marry
ing her father's coachman. There is no
law , divine or human , against that , and
in this republic uiuu rinu. to wealth and
consequence from positions no higher
than that of Sohelling , ADraham Lincoln
was a rail-splitter , Andrew Johnson was
a tailor , John Jacob Astor was a humble
durmuu , and Cornolious Vanderbilt
started as a poor boatman , There are
yery few fortunes in America which wore
not earned by t'noir possessors , or which ,
at least , are more than two generations
old.
old.Hut
Hut the daughter of Mr. Morosmi mar
ried in utter disregard of her parents ,
without having consulted them , and with
the knowledge that she would till them
with sorrow and mortification. They
had reared her with infinite tenderness ,
anil when she was grown to womanhood
she deserted them as if they had no title
whatever to her consideration ; na if
tbeir devotion and watchful care wore as
nothing compared with her selfish
caprices.
There are multitudes of young people
who toss their heads and say that it la
nobody's -business
- besides their own
whom they marry. Wo are in louo , they
pry , and ot course wo shall marry. But
it is by no moans true that because a man
and a woman are in love they ought to
get married , it J < n dangerous and a
foolish step for them to venture upou
matrimony without lovo. but it is equally
raali and imprudent for them to go into
matrimony for no other reason than that
they nro fond of each othor. The love
may have no suillciont basis of rnspect to
assure its permanence , and the dilTorcnco
of training , disposition and association
may rauso thorn to bo unequally yoked
together. Inherited disease , mental ,
moral or physical , may make the lives of
their children a curse to themselves and
to the community. And they may not bo
reaily to marry because of other and
prudential reasons , The bars to matri
mony are many.
A marriage , too , Is the business of
other people besides the two who uronoso
to got married. There are two families
to bo considered , for is not a now mem
ber to bo brought into each ? A daughter
is to bo g'vcn ' up to the keoplngof another
than her parents , and Is not that a trans
fer in which they have an interest so deep
that they should bo consulted as to it ?
The community also has its right , and it
takes care to enforce them by law , for
the title to property nnd the maintenance
of thoofl'springof the union nro involved.
Last , the children to come of the marriage
riago are Dossiblo nnd probable parties
whoso rights must bo guarded in the con-
tract.
So , you sec , young people , that mar
riage is a very serious business , in which
many others besides yourselves have n ,
right to bo considered. Therefore , when
you propose to marry , take all the stops
openly and with duo regard to everybody
who In now or who is likely to bo nlVected
by the contract. Then the chances that
you will repent of the stop , as Mrs.
Schelling has done , will bo reduced to a
minimum. Matrimony is nn honorable
state ; therefore , take care to go into it
honorably.
IN WONDERLAND.
Tlio lllcli Treasures Thnt Tile Hurled
Beneath thn Internal City.
Rome Letter in Philadelphia Tele
graph : Beneath the soil of the Eternal
City are myriads of yet undiscovered
souvenirs of Homo's great past. Above
the soil each day develops ono or moro
reminders of certain human characteris
tics whloli unfortunately too strongly ac
centuate Italy's present. But everything
in its place so lot us talk in the first ,
place of the buried trcasnre-trovo.
I have never kept a list of Iho priceless
relics that are being brought to light
nearly overv week , but I know , if I had ,
that for a single year it would prove a
long one. And this thing has been going
on for years , perhaps for ton years.
Since the city of the Ctcsars , in the days
of the Unification , imbibed the lo
tion of perennial youth , and has taken on
a now lease of life , buildinza have boon
sprunir up on every side , the streets have
been cut through old villa and palace
properties that had slumbered in laziest
luxury for centuries. All this has neces
sitated digglng.nnd the forty-niner's pick
nnd spade in the gold-tields were never
as sure of striking ore as the Roman
excavators have all a'ong ' boon exhum
ing something as good as gold. If the
stock in the Capitol keeps on replenish
ing at the rate it has been , a museum will
soon bo needed half as bijr as the town it
self.
self.I
I can'c begin to tell you what they
have exhumed in recent years. Pagan
gods , ancient beauties , emperors without
number , statesmen and warriors have
como up again to the top of earth's crust
in every known metal or material which
sculptors over hewed at or modeled.
They have awakened from their long
nap , and hopped out into the nir minus
perhaps a leg or an arm , and frequently
lackinsr a nose with which to snilV mod
ern tirnos. Indeed , it not rarely happens
that a statue has lost his or her head
quite after the fashion of some nowadays
people. And , what to me is singular , re
search doesn't always succeed in finding
the missing member or headpiece. Thorn
are quantities of archaeologists in Rome ,
and some of them world-famous , who
two very practical theories as to the
reason of such and such a disappearance ;
but it is purely conjecture , of course , and
I prefer to speculate for myself as to the
wny and wherefore. It is a bewildering
subject. Just think of all the soil be
neath this big city being peopled with
such marble spectres. Science may sat
isfactorily explain ovorythinc : , but imag
ination , less cold , runs \v.ild through that
underneath region.
This evening's ' papers report another
discovery. In digging the foundation of
the National bank over in the new Via
Nazionato quarter several rich finds have
startled the savants. The latest is the
well preserved remain's of an old Roman
house , which , already they say it , be
longed to about the second century of
the Christian era. The walls are decor
ated with paintings representing col
umns and vases united by borders of
arabesque flowers and fruits. The decor
ations largely help the wise men to guess
at tlio date of construction of the ancient
mansion ; but. curiously enough , in the
present case , there is a singular admix
ture of the Christian and profane , some
of the walls portraying Biblical subjects ,
while others commemorate incidents in
the lives of Bacchus nnd his merriest
contemporaries. Ono largo wall space is
divoted to Ksciilaplus. Another feature
of this most recent exhumation is a tomb
well tilled with human bones a fact
which pu//.les the modern student , in
view of the fact that the ancient law for
bade interment within the walls of the
city.
city.There
There have been several ether very re
cent discoveries of a similar character ,
and dig on whatever side yon wilt of this
wonderful old tofvn , the labor will al
ways bo rewarded. I once thought seri
ously of bnyinsr ono property on the out
skirts of the city solely tor the purpose of
diving down into wonderland and hunt
ing for treasures. I really thought it
would bo a good investment , so greedily
does the world yearn for those art treas
ures. I changed my mind , however ,
when I ascertained that all these gems ,
found by whomsoever they wore , and on
properly belonging to whomever it might
bo , reverted to the city of Rome. How
rapidly and ho\v marveloiihly her store
houses of art are being furnished thcso
days ! And yet whoever conies to Rome ,
nnd leaves wondering at what ho sees of
antiquity's mementos , should consider
that ho has walked above , yut never scon ,
treasures richer and greater far than the
guide books tell of in the museums.
Journalism nnd lie SB.
Atlanta Constitution : Myyoungirioud
John Smith , who was graduated by u
university a few weeks ago , and who
rushed into "journalism , " as ho called
it , came into my room yesterday after
noon , fanned himself rigorously with his
hut , nnd remarked :
"I shall quit this business ! "
"You moan you will leave the news
paper business ? " I asked.
tlYos " ho "tho truth is
, replind ; , nowa-
papers pay moro for legs than they defer
for brains , "
"Do you moan that you have moro
brains than logs ? " I asked , with affected
surprise.
"I moan that I have run four miles in
the hot sun trying to run down a rumor ,
and it won't pan out live linos. "
So Smith is going to quit the newspa
per business beouuscv ho has bruins to
sell whoa the newspapers want nothing
but legs. Of course Smith's place will
have to bo filled. That is , a man wilj
have to bo put on when Smith vacates.
The man who stays on will hayolcgs , but
ho will have brains also. Ho will Know ,
lirst , what news is. That will require
brains. Knowing what no vvs is , Smith's
successor will got that news , and ho will
got It quietly. That will require not
only logs , bu it will require porsover.
anco and peniatcnco that regards neither
distance , dilllculties nor circumstances.
Journalism is ono thing , but the newspa
per biumesa is altogether BomothlBg olso.
HOME'S ' HEALTHFUL WORK ,
Increasing Opportunities for First Olass
Ilonsokeopcrs.
THE IDEAL WORK OF WOMEN.
MofuulorliiRs ot n Modest Mnlti
Pioneer , Kncrectlc nnd Wealthy
Women Choice Select IOIIH
for the Knlr Sex.
The Modest Mnld ,
Ihiiifnnl talli ) Tlmd.
This Is the modoit little maid
"Who always used to bo atiald
Her charms would boo'ermuch displayed
IJy ballroom dress ;
But to the seashore she has strayed ,
And In a b.UMIni ; suit arrayed ,
fcjlio doth exhibit undismayed ,
Her loveliness.
"A dress when cut decollete , "
This modest damsel used to say ,
"Attorns a deal too much display
OF neek and arms ; "
jiiit mark tlm Inconsistency
She now meanders by tlm sea ,
In dress dfucBiiilltiir to her knee ,
Without alarms.
Thoiich she Is of such modest mien
'I ImPovor would she blush. I ween ,
Were but an Inch of anklosecn
By boorish churls ;
i ct admiration dotn she court ,
As on the beach she doth dlsnort ,
Attired In skirts , 1 vow , as short
As ballot Klrls' .
And , what Is moro , 'tis her dclhrht
To koisp exhibited in sight
Her neck nnd arms suproiuly white
To win a smile.
et this Is she who none could press
1 o don a low-necked ballroom dross ,
Ah , Well , the reason you can guess-
It is the stylo.
Good Housekeepers Wanted.
Good Housekeeping ; There is now nn
increasing opportunity in this country
for women to find employment as house
keepers. As modes of living and claims
of society become moro complex their aid
will more frequently bo required in our
homes. It is possible that .young people
may some time be trained for this work ,
but at present it is ofteneft taken up by
women thrown upon their own resources
without any previous special traintiiK ,
but whoso homo experience or domestic
tastes incline them to this way of self-sup
port. Ideally there can bo no pleasanter
work for n woman. It in sheltered ,
without very wearing business responsi
bility , and its successes often win a pecu
liar gratitude. It is a privilege to pro
vide homo comfort and cheer , even
though ono bo not the owner
and head of the homo. The house
keeper , even if her nature bo not
wholly practical , all the more , perhaps ,
for her jiossessing some ideality , finds
her duties con < cen'.al because they are
homo duties. Even though she may bo
placed in an institution or a boarding
school , her oft'ort must still be to make it
a larger home. She is aiming at pleasant
ness in the range of rooms that are her
world ; that is why she docs not tire of
them. Bright windows , clean floors , a
nicely appointed table there is a satis
faction in securing those , because ono is
thus forming the background or founda
tion for all manner of higher delight and
cheer. That one may legitimately give
one's self up to this work to the exclu
sion of claims moro dillicult and respon
sible , such as the promotion of church or
social welfare , whi.cJi .many a wife and
mother must take in addition to her
housekeeping , is in itself a rest to the
feelings of some women.
Housekeeping is also very healthful
work. It requires constant bodily activity
if only in oversight. From garret to
collar one's presence must bo known ,
and the housekeeper best supplied with
hclphnusfoccasioii enough in practical
teaching or lending a hand to supply de
ficiencies to keep liorblood ; in verv active
circulation. The work ipiposcs no undue
tax upon the braid , tlfcit most easily vic
timized of our jnic'llibors ' by modern
civilization , yet it keu'jis every faculty of
thought and feeling busy in the various
contingencies that daily arise.
The housekeeper gains an appreciation
of quiet comfort known to few women in
like degree ; and in right circumstances
she , has some opportunity to secure if.
No. woman loarim'ibotter than she what'
the four walls to h'er room can bo to her
when an hour of quiet1 comes. She has
had activity enough to give her acst for
the book or newspaper or bit of sowing
she may take up tjliero . Thought which
has boon shut up by business rushes in
now with a flood tide , and , behold every
rock and stump of the day's material
cares has hidden some secret spring to
swell the flow of thought. That is as
God has ordered it in this double earthly
and spiritual lifo of ours. In all English
novels how often and how pleasantlv al
lusion ismade ] to the housekeeper's room ,
Remembrances of homely comfort hang
adout It. Cheering cups of tea are dis
pensed there ; cleanly fiagrances as of
mvondar pervade it ; plants grow in the
windows for all whoso lives are a good
deal limited by house walls delight in the
culture of plants. They are a miniature
world of nature brought inside tlio home
for convenience of resource. But the
real charm of the place is in a sure no
and comfortable presence , always free to
minister to wants , hoar grievances or rc-
llovo ailments _
Tlio Itlcliest Woman In the World.
Panama Star : I notice an intcscsting
paragraph in an English journal which
informs us that a l.uith firm tias just com
pleted a handsome screw steam-launch
which has just been built to the order of
Mrs. Consono , a South American lady ,
who is reported to bo the richest woman
in the world. The launch , which is bmlt
of stcol , is twenty-five feet in length , and
is to bo employed as a tender to her largo
yuoht. ( The largo yaoht is engaged at
present in the unpretending but prolita-
bio business of carrying coals from Lota to
Valparaiso. ) It is elaborately fitted up in
polished mahogany , and is to bo dis
patched forthwith by ono of the mail
steamers from Liverpool for conveyance
to Chili.
Besides being the richest lady in the
world , she also enjoys the singular privi
lege of being empress over a tract of ter
ritory called Lota , which lies some two
or three hundred miles to tlio south ot
the port. It may appear strange to
speak of nn empress in the heart of a free
republic , but nevertheless the fact exists ;
and so absolute are her majesty's powers
that there are few of her subjects who
would be resolute and courageous
enough to claim the possession of their
own inimoital souls , or who would not be
prepared to deny that on the making of
the place a special arrangement was
made with reference to coal doposlts between -
twoon the Divinity nnd the reigning mon
arch.
During her absence the government is
carried on , much as it is in Ireland , by
moans of a Viceroy , with the exception
that while the Irish nro not unfrequontly
rebellious nnd troublesome and actually
lay claim to the right of having a slight
gay in their destinies either in this world
or hi that which is to come such a super
natural ollbrt never enters the simple and
uncomplaining minds of the population
of this remarkable portion of God's foot
stool , And why should it bo otherwise ?
The viceroy or boss pasha and his court
have been so long accustomed to licking
and cleaning the boots of their sovereign
mistress aim pawing ojouir their own in
return to their subordinates , who perform
a sitriilar but humbler tusk and keep the
ball rolling always downward , that It
would be at once a dangerous und un
kindly action to persuade them tnat they
are featherlcss bipdds nud not dirt-eating
automatons.
to Toaoh Our Daughters.
Charleston ( a. C. ) Dispatch : At a so
cial gatucring some one proposed this
question ; "What shall I tench my
unnglitort" The following replies wore
handed Ins
T.cnoi | her that 100 cents makn a dollar.
Toacli her how to arrange the parlor
nnd the library.
Teach her to say "NV and moan it , or
"Yo.V and stick to It.
Tonch her how to wear a calico dress ,
and to wear it liken queen.
Teach her how to sow on buttons , darn
stockings and mend gloves.
Teach her to dress for health and com
fort ns well as for appearance.
Toacli her to cultivate flowers and keep
the kitchen garden.
Teach her to make the neatest room in
the house.
Teach her to have nothlntr to do with
intemperate or dissolute yonnc men.
Teach her that tight lacing Is uncomely
ns well as Injurious to health.
Teach her to regard the morals and
habits , ami not money , in selecting her
associates.
Teach her to observe the old rnlo : "A
plaoo for everything , and everything in
its placo. "
Teach her that music , drawing and
painting nru real accomplishments in the
home , and are not to bo neglected if there
bo time nud money for their use.
Teach her the important truism ; That
the more she lives within her Income the
more she will save , and the farther she
will get nwny from the poor-homo.
Teach her that a good , steady churchgoing -
going mechanic , farmer , clerk or teacher
without n cent is worth moro than forty
loafers or non-producers in broadcloth.
Teach her to embrace every opportun
ity for reading , and to select such books
ns will give hot the most useful and prac
tical information in order to make the best
progress in earlier as well as later homo
nnd school life.
Scandal.
A whisper broke the air ,
A soil , llijht tone , and low ,
Yet barbed with siiamo and woo ;
Now , might It only perish thorc ,
Nor further co I
Ah , mo ! a quick and oaeeroar
Ciiucht np the little moanlnu' soiindl
Another voice has breathed it clear ;
And It so wandeicd round ,
From ear to lip , iroin lip to ear.
Until it reached a gentle heart ,
And that H broke.
The IMonecr Womou of California.
San Francisco Report : Thirty-live
years ago an ox team was creeping across
Iho plains to California. By night the
men walked , on guard against the
Indians. By day the women tramped be
side the patient uoasts. Food was scarce ,
and it was necessary to save the cattle.
At the head of ono of these teams trudged
a young woman with eyes alert for too
in form of rod-skin or friend in shape of
water. Blistered bare feet for shoes
were worn out early in the tramp sun-
scarred faces and hands rock-hardened
through constant exposure bespoke the
hardships of the trip as they painfully
dragged into Truckco after mouths of
travel. That trip scarred itself into
a memory that never grew dim
until thrco week ago. Then
a palace sleeper , a baggairemun , a
transfer company and a telegraph rubbed
so heavily upon the indolliblo mark of 51
that now buujho faintest outline of tlio
figures remain. The terrible trials en
dured by pur pioneer women will never
bo appreciated by the palaco-hotcl-cablc-
car-telcpliono generation. The girls of
to-day cannot understand why their
mothers and grandmothers were in such
a hurry to get hero. The fact that many
came to join husbands does not seem to
lisruro with Miss Shallow. But mid a
year or two and a share of love to Miss
Shallow's oxporince and even this good-
match day she herself might travel from
ocean to ocean to join a dear one. Our
present day women nro just as noble ,
just as brave and just as true as those
who live in the iiausealingly praised
"good old times. "
Women's Names.
Charles Dudley Warner in Harper's
Magazine : Now , however good a wo
man's name may be , she is in danger
except , they say , in Massachusetts of
losing it , and commonly in the change
she blots out all traces of her former ex1
istence and even identity. In royal and
noble families tlio attempt bus been made
to pile so many names upon the female
infant that some of them should
stick through lifo , and we have to some
extent , imitated this m our republic by
giving girls two and three names , some
times a string of very pretty appellations
taken out of novels , and especially it' the
child is poor she will bo rich in names.
This is all very well so long as the girl
remains Clarissa Elvira Euphcmia Ilos-
kins ; but when it would become Clarissa
Elvira Euphcmia Hoskins Pond it is too
much , and cither the surname or some
ot-tlio baptismal names have to be thrown
overboard. All thcso and many ether in
conveniences can bo avoided and the
nersonal identity of a woman bo secured
through all changes by a very simple
device.
In the first place give the girl in
baptism only ono nanlo. She will bo per
fectly content with it. Her lover never
requires , never uses , but ono of her
names , if she has half a dozen. In the
height of his tenderness ho never says :
"Amelia Jane , como to my arms ! " Ho
simply extends his arms and cries :
"Janu ! " In the second place , when the
girl marries lot her always keep her sur
name. Then , whenever wo see a woman's
name wo shall know whether she is mar
ried or single ; and if she is married , wo
shall know what her family name is. If
she has earned a reputation as a writer
or a doctor or an LL. D. as Mary Brown ,
she will carry that witli her as Mary
Brown Johnson ; and In all cases there
will bo spared an infinite amount of talk
and inquiry as to who she was before she
was married.
This system is essential to the "cause"
of woman. It may bo said that lacks
perfection in two respects. We could
not toll from the three names whether
the bearer of them might not bo a widow.
and it makes no provision for a second
marriagp. Thcso are delicate questions.
In regard to the liivt , It Is nobody's busi
ness to know whether tlio woman is or is
not a widow , unless she chooses to make
that tact prominent , und she has ways
enough to emphasize it. And in the second
end place it docs not at all matter what
becomes of the name of the first hus
band. It is the woman's identity that is
to bo preserved. And she cannot bo re
quired to set up milo-stonos all along her
life.
Once there was a maid whose hftauty
Put to shame the choicest art ,
Yut aho'd shirk no household duty ,
And she even had a heart ,
O'er her fucu smiles chased each other
Llku the sunbeams In tlio rose
And never let her mntlutr
Sweep the bteps or wash the clothes ,
Kvery night the grand piano
Sang , nuponslvo to hur touch
And this maid of charming manner
OU made bread niut pies and tmch.
She was fair of form and feature ,
Diamonds paled bunealli her glance ;
Yet tills handsome da/zllng creature
Used to mend her brother's pants.
P. S. Her address has been lost.
Women.
St. Paul Glebe : The women of Dickey
county , Dakota , appreciate their Import
ance. They recognize yery well that the
scarcity of feminine society in the great
and growing territory and the natural
gallantry * of your true Dakotan gives
them the whip-hand , nnd they propose
utilizing their opportunity to the fullest
extent. In vio\v of the important factor
they form In the life of thu territory the
DIolcey county women have coma lo thu
conclusion that thov can best assert their
Independence and best compel a recog
nition from the opposite sex of their ne
cessity by booking political preferment.
Accordingly ono ot their niitnbcr has
been nominated for superintendent of
public schools , nnd they call upon their
masculine friends nnd admirers to
support her umlor pain of their
direct displeasure , The result is in
evitable. The Dakota youth , with the
alternative of spending the coming long
winter evening * away from the comfort
able lireMdo of his duloinen should he re
fuse to comply with her request to vote
for Iho women's candidate , will not take
long in doeidlnir submissively to obey her
mandate. Only ho who Ims'endured the
isolation of a Dakota winter can appre
ciate how thoroughly ell'eetivo the throat
will probably bo. 'Iho Dakota girl has n
will and a way of liorown , and tint young
men have been taught to reali/.o that
fact. There Is no doubt that , under the
circumstances , the petticoat candidate
will win easily over the masculine oppo
nent , should any have the temerity to
present hursplf , purlicnlnrlv If she should
boyoungand prntiy.and the < ! loboi relia
bly informed by Colonel Donun , Editor
Edwards and other unprejudiced ob
servers that all Dakota women are that.
And inasmuch us the men of Dakota nro
all needed to till her broad acres of wheat
landwhy shouldn't the women bo trusted
with the supervision of the children's ed
ucation ?
Women Will Travel.
Detroit Free Press : "Has it over co
curred to you , " asked a traveling man of
a reporter for the Free Press at tlm Mich
igan Central passenger depot yesterday ,
"that the women who travel out number
the men In about the proportion of four
to two ? "
"Never thought of it. "
"Well , that's a fact. You'll find it so
all over the United States. I never .sit
down in a waiting-room or passenger
station that 1 doit count the inmates.
Comes just as natural ns life a habit
that 1 have gotten Into. In this room ,
now , ladies outnumber the men live to
two , as you wilt find by counting thorn.
It varies greatly , of course , but anyone
who has wntchml the thing as long as 1
have will say that mv general average is
correct. "
"When I was In Europe , " continued
the traveling man , "a great many people
spoke to me about the penchant of the
American people for travel. 1 toll you
that the woman nro responsible for our
reputation in this regard. They will
travel about the country and stand moro
fatigue than the men and find enjoyment
in it. "
The New Way to Knisc Money.
Ilowto coax money out of the pockets
of the masculines is a problem that occu
pies the heads of ibo fair sex when sumo
charitable object is In contemplation.
The cry is always for something now ,
something out of the ordinary , which
will plouso either through its novelty or
boe'Uiso it appeals to a sense of the ludi
crous. A recent and popular feature of
bazaars , wliich has been copied from
parties under the name of "rainbow , " is
the following. A certain number of
ladies presumably those : noted for
beauty , accomplishments , etc. wear
aprons of different colors. These aprons
are numbered. Tickets with numbers
corresponding are sold to any one of the
sterner sex who chooses to buy them , and
then the purchaser of each ticket cocs
hunting around alter the apron which
bears the number of his ticket. Ho is
expected to pay a second price for the
apron , which ho can give back to the
pretty wearer or take homo as a present
to somii- ono of the femitiincs there.
Whether ; the possession of tlio ticket cor
responding to the apron gives the pur
chaser any especial claim tip on the fair
damsel horsdt deponent saith not.
Voung Jjadlas Bhould ho Cautions In.
Their Female Acquaintances.
San Francisco Report : It's rather the
thing to warn a young girl against the
society men she meets at tashloable
watering places. But there is moro need
to caution her about the women. A faster
or easy-going society woman can smudge
the innocence of a young girl more
quickly than can the unpunished libertine.
Mothers should begin to reali/.o that gay
married women tire not the , chnporones
for modest daughters. Neither should a
mother permit her daughter to make
friends with women about whom she
knows nothing. It is not safe , as a
society , girl could toll if she wanted to.
The young lady in question rs very well
known , ! 12 I gave but the faintest clew
her identity would bo known , so 1 shall
not scatter curiosity anise seed. She was
at Santa Barbara last year , and there
made the acquaintance of u pretty dash
ing woman. Our little friend was at
first fascinated. With intimacy grow
alarm. Suddenly the friendship wavered ,
then broke. But those three weeks
taught thai girl a heap she wished they
hadn't. Now innocence is displaced by
suspicion. Never again will her thoughts
bo written on an unsoiled page. That
unguarded intimacy blotted it forever.
N'cnt , bite Not Gaudy.
The following is a pretty model for a
young lady's autumn dross : It is plain
indigo blue cashmere , and the same
material brocaded all over with very
small bright yellow crescents. The
bodice , which Is quite close fitting , of the
plain cashmere , forms three small flat
plaits on each side , while the centre part
is of brocaded material , simulating a
plastron or plain vest , buttoned with
small round buttons of dark-bine passe
menterie and finished into a point , At
the back the bodice is continued into a
small puffed-out position basque , which
rests upon the draped toiirnnre of the
skirt. This skirt is ot the dark-blue cashmere -
more draped diagonally in front , with
tabs or panels of the brocaded material
on each side , and a narrow fluting of the
.sumo showing just beyond the edgo. The
sleeves of the plain cashmere have , ac
cording to the MOW fashion , no facing or
rovers of any kind in the lower part , but
11 peaked trimming of the brocaded tissue
from the shoulder down nearly to the
elbows.
An Old-Now Style ol'WonrliiK the Jliilr
Boston Record ; Some girls and young
women are beginning to part and wave
their hair again in the fashion so becom
ing to a certain typo of facco , in vogue a
do/.en years ago. The hair should bo
tied at the nape with a ribbon of the sumo
color as the hair , Nothing can he neat
er , but the hair must , bu kept with ex
quisite caro. Tortoise-shell combs and
hair-pins with ornamented tops are more
worn than ever. They break oasilj , but
they are certainly more ollective than
wire ones. It is said that after a woman
has once been in Pjirls Him is never again
guilty of letting a wire pin show in her
hair. If she continues to wear them she
leanis deftly to conceal them.
Why Von Shouldn't Snul ) a ( toy.
Christian Advocate ; Don't snub a boy
bocaiiHQ ho wears shabby clothes. When
Edison , the Inventor of the telephone ,
first entered Boston , ho wore a pair of
yellow linen breeches in the depth of
winter.
Don't snub a bov because his homo Is
plain and unpretending. Abraham Lin
coln's early home was a log cabin ,
Don't snub a boy bccau.se of the ignor
ance of his parents. Shakespeare , the
world's poet , wtis the son of a man who
was unablu to write Ills own name.
Don't snub a boy because ho chooses
an humble trade. The author of Pil
grim's Progress was a tinker.
Don't snub a boy because of physical
disability. Milton was blind.
Don't snub a boy bcc-uiso of dullness
in Ids lessons , Hogarth , the celebrated
painter and engraver , was a stupid boy
at his books.
Don't snub a boy because ho stutters.
Demosthenes , the great orator of Urccco ,
overcame a harsh and stammering voice.
Don't snub any ono , Not alone be
cause they may far outstrip you in the
race of life , but because It in neither
kind , nor right , nor Christian ,
ADVENTURES OF MIMES ,
Base Ball Audiences Which Ilavo Sonio-
times Become Mobs.
THE TOSS AND THE TWIST ,
The Involution of the Uniplro and
Some of Ills Many WcnlcncsHCs.
Sure Thine ( Jnmtilers
nnd the Game.
The umpire is an alleged necessity.
Without him it is averred that the na
tional game could not be maintained.
Some people argue that base ball is not n
necessity , luince Iho umpire is not a ne
cessity ; but such people place no vuluo
on recreation nnd will go through lifo
without experiencing the exhilarations ,
the delights and exasperations of a closely
contested game of base ball. They will
never reali/.o that intense sympathy that
ono feels for the homo club when it is be
hind and the umpire insists on giving de
cisions on all close plays in favor of the
other side. Neither will they over know
what a priceless pleasure it is on such nn
occasion to relieve ono's feelings by a few
well timed and emphatic remarks , or of
the wealth of expression that rises up
within ono at such a time , U is proba
ble ; howuvor , that the umpire appreciates
all thcso things. If ho docs not It is cer
tainly not the fault of the players or of
the patrons of the game. The authority
with which ho is invested and thu per
versity with which ho exorcises it make
him at once the common enemy of play
ers and enthusiastic Hpcctatorn , Ho has
no respect for either players or public ,
and is remorseless in inflicting injuries
that can never bo repaired. Ho calls < '
balls against the best pitchers I :
and tells them he will line them if they
ask "what was the matter with that last
ball" ; ho calls strike ngainst the best
batsman , and charucs them .fit ) for sug
gesting that tlio ball was "too high , " or
"too low , " or "not over the plate"na
the case may bo : ho yells "foul" when
ono of Iho homo players makes a hit to
left that everybody in the stand can t-eo
is "fair" ; ho says "safe. " when ono of the
other side tries to steal second and is
thrown out by the catcher , und when the
game is a tie ho lets ono of the other
side's players come homo from second
base without over going near the third
bag. The number ot other miiiuilics that
ho is guilty of is .simply appalling , and ho
docs all this for $ .200 a month nnd ex
penses. For that stipend ho takes his
life m his own hands and sallies forth to
torture ball plavers and plague their
friends into hostility , lie has been hissed ,
groaned at and threatened , and In some
instances pelted with various missiles.
On a few occasions lie has been assaulted.
In Cincinnati they have tried to suppress
him with beer glasses , and In Baltimore
they have turned their toughs on him :
anil all to no purpose , for ho has bobbed
up serenely at the very next game. If
not a necessity ho is certainly daring and
irrepressible.
The evolution of the professional um
pire is a part of the history of the game
of base-ball. In the earlier years of the
came there wore no professional umpires.
When one club visited the other some
local player was asked to officiate , and
lie usually felt complimented by the re
quest. The homo club was expected to
furnish the umpire with a chair , and if
the sun shone with an umbrella. When
equipped with these he took u seat about
twenty feet to the right of the plate and
the game proceeded. 'I ' ho umbrella
served to protect the holder from the
rays of the sun and also from foul balls
that might be pointed in his direction.
In those days pitchcts were not allowed
to throw the ball , which had to bo de
livered to the batsman by u regulation
toss. Curves were unknown. The bats
man enjoyed all the privileges of the oc
casion , and need not strike at the ball un
til it came to him just as ho wanted It ,
and a strike was never called unless the
batsman actually made a swing at the
ball. The games lasted longer , but they
gave just ns good satisfaction as the
game of the present day. It is a matter
of record that in a game played on the
Elysinn fields in 1809 Harry Wright' who
was then a pitcher , delivered fifty-three
balls to a batsman before the latter at
tempted to strike at ono. The batsman
called for a low ball , and indicated , by
holding 'his bat about a foot from the
ground , just whore ho wanted it.
When ho got a ball that
suited him ho made the longest
hit over made on Iho grounds , buch
monotonous performances , and the fact
that they exhausted pitchers caused a re
vision of the rules. Then experience and
knowledge of the rules became essential
qualifications for tlio umpire's position ,
and led to compensation for services per
formed In the position. At first the pay
was -f5 a day and expenses. In 1871 when
the Bostons came to Chicago to play the
White Stockings , Harry McLuno , of
Washington , came on to umpire the
games , and was allowed special compen
sation and expenses , the total of which
was a little over f 100. About thu same
time the Mutuals.of Now York.flourlshod
under the special patronage of Boss
Tweed. All the best players in the club
were on the city's pay roll , when ) they
figured as inspectors of pumps , hydrants ,
and other equally important public in
stitutions. The only thing they attended
to so far as their olliclal duties were con
cerned was to draw their pay. When
they played against another club they en
deavored to gel nn umpire who was fav
orable to them. Whenever nn umpire
gave them any cause for complaint he in
curred1 the displeasure ot the "Boss" anil
and his followers , and Now York became
very disagreeable for him , The Mutuals
played very few games around New York
in which the umpire was not on their
In 187J : , 1871 , and 1875 there was iv
syndicate of Hiiro-thing gamblers organ
ized for the purpose ot manipulating and
and betting on ball games. The con
trolling Hpirit is now a bookmaker in
Now York. Ho had partners in Boston ,
Philadelphia , and Chicago , and stood in
with enough ball players and umpires to
enable him to dictate the winners of
various games. In those years there was
n great deal of butting on ball games and
the manipulators reaped a rich harvest.
OiiUiilu of controlling players and um
pires they had enough mlliieiioo to muko
matters quite unpleasant for umpires who
did not luvor their schemes. Salaries
were not so large then as they are now ,
an.l avaricious players were easily won
over to crooked work by promises of re
wards greater than a whole year's salary.
Umpires , too , easily overcame their con
scientious Ecruplcs when they found out
they could make # J5. ! $50 , or > ? 100 on a
uaiiio as well nsjho $5 or ? 10 they got for
their services. A knowledge of this btato
of affairs made the friond.t of the game
apprehensive of its future , and every
ell'ort was made to secure honest games
und allow none but men of integrity tenet
net as umpires. The sybtem of engaging
umpires was not , however , chamrud or
improved until 18 : ! ; } , when the salary
system was introduced. Before salaries
were paid the usual compensation was
$5 u game. The Chicago club , however ,
paid $10 , There was n great deal of
kicking at the old umpires , and , if any
thing , there is more than ever before at
the salaried men , It scorns impossible
for any umpire to give general satisfac
tion.
For sick headache , female troubles ,
neuralgic pains in the head take J , H.
McLean's Liver and Kidney Pellets , S
centi a vittl.