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About Omaha daily bee. (Omaha [Neb.]) 187?-1922 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 15, 1886)
THE OMAHA DAILY BEE : SUNDAY , AUGUST 15. 18S6.--TW ELVIS PAGES. 11 THE UMPIRE. i The following lines nn dedicated to the Jovers of baseball nil oU-r the country , with out any extra charge : Mother. mny I Mtijr the umpire , May I slmj him rlcht away. SIP he cannot IK * there , mother , Wlion the club bcslns to ploy ? Lot me cla p Ms throat , dear mother , In n dear , delightful itrlp With oiio hand. niulvltli the other Uatlilm eu'ral In tlie lip. Lot me climb his frame , dear innllicr , \V hllo Iliu hfippj PLMIII'U ' shout ; I'll nut kill him , denrcst ninlliur , 1vlll 1 only knock linn out I.ol mo mop the lloorup , mother , Wl'h ' Ills ircrson , deuiest , do : If the ground can stand It , mother , 1 don't sue why > on cm't. too. Mother , may I MIIR thn umpire , him rlijht between the eyes If ) uu'll let nicdo It , mother. Von glmll lm\o the chnmplon prize. rou Tin : IAIUKB. niteklcs on shoes nre In cut steel and bronze. KxmdMto open worked hose nio jetted or lllnck tfloxes arc worn with black nndhlto rrunliiK toilets. "Loin ? hoed milts wlileli reach to the elbow ore very stylish. Safety pins set with Jewels nre In f.xvor for nd'Hnciy ' purposes. ( I lace gloves have IOIIR wrists \\HhbtiUons InMoad of molisqiictalro. Sleeve * nro nindo In n vailety ot styles and rejolco In all sorts of immi's. Woolen Inco of nil colors and designs will bo used for autumn diesscs. Vests aio mndo lone and full. ending con siderably below the waist line. Stilncs are nrranned perpendicularly , hor- irontally and diagonally In the sumo costume. A u'lrl mav be speaklnc the Until when slio eajHt "Well , 1 like that fellow's Impudence. " Therolspinutlcally no limit to the variety of designs for bodice and slee\es. "Allnio edjjc paper , ( luted with prismatic colors , Is one of the ugly fancies In witting paper. London has n female cab-driver. She ex pects to elope with a nice young man of line family. Dandelions and buttercups are favoilto flower.s In millinery. 'I'he edclweis , In vel vet , Is ttlM ) very decant. A prasol may well servo as nn Indication of tin ) ( 'mend good sense and cultivated taste oi the wearer. Vciv narrow pointed toes are thn fashion In both boots and shoes , Laced booty are not so stylish as those which button. It Is stated that a jounir girl In Now York Hn skllitul locksmith. She is piobablyone of those whom lo\o laughs at. Oveidrcsscs aio caucht up in fiont by frill rosettes or .Maltese ciossosof ilbbon , after the fashion of furniture dranoiy of "lauir Byne. " Thebelloof a country ball was asked to wait ? . > lN'o , much blceircd , " was the artless reply ; "them round dances allus tuin my stomach. " liictnn vests ore exceedingly popuhr , They nio set in under bunds of gallon 01 bias folds of the matei In ) , or aie simply buttoned to the bodice on either bide. Tussoin silk nio now stiiped or brocaded , or pi luted In blight coloix They will clean ndmhahly , and are theiefore seniceablo tor drcses for youni ; gills. lllack lace mitts comlne fai up on the arm and terinlimtlni ; in scall oped tops in open \votlc meshes are run tlnough with iiauow colored velvet ribbon. O Cloth postillion bisques made double- breasted and edgedwlth braid In tailor fashion nro used by many ladles instead of Jerseys as an cxtia bodice Irt wear with various skills. Waterpioofs , of light weight woolen mate- terial In dark and medium tints are prutem- bio tothosaof rubber. Tim material sheds water and has nouo of the unpleasant odor of India umber. The ( lalnsborough lint glows In popularity with the advance or the season. The brims to the newest shapes aio as wide as the 01 ig- Inal ptctniesnno models of other days , but nio narrower nt the back. Kveii In .Massachusetts , where there are 00,000 moio women than men , gioat dlfllcultv Is experienced in sccuiini : maid servants and washerwomen. It is claimed that the ciils are spoiled lor hoiisowoik by dabbling in llt- cratuio. Mis. Drenkh.iln , a widow living south of Lowlbton , Wlnonn county , Minn. , has TOO acres of giidn. She runs lour self-binders with live horses attached to each , and a full crew of shockers , and o\crscei. the whole out- lit herself. Miss Minnie Oaidncr , of Joncsvillo , Mich. , rode a sell-binder to cut lifty acies of wheat , and cut and inked nil the hay on her father's fni m. She bays slio enjoys that kind of em ployment. anil prolers ft to swinging In n hammock. Mrs. "Captain" J. W. Holmes advertises in the MyMie , Conn , . 1'icss foi the retiiin of hei nightgown , which was solen with other things troin her homo bv burglars. She adds that It was marked. No burglar will bo safe in wearing It , Mis. John W. Macknyls said to bo the American woman lecently refused nil invitation to the queen's b.ill , notwithstand ing her iipiilicatiou was iniloised by the 1'rince ot Wales. I'os.sibly that was the icason of her rejection. The parasol hhould always bo neat nnd plain Mthur than gaudy and eccentilc nnd ought always , if possible , to haimonUo witli the die.ss with which It Is worn , nnd hoem In reality n simple , neccssaty pait of the toilet minor than an mtlclo of display , liken bannerol a line , ' A Wall street operator Informs a reporter that them nio no female biokers nnd very low speculating women. The only way women licnro In Wall street Is as employes. A miles of them work as clciks nnd type writers. 1 hey nro .said to linvo a good eifect on uusi ness because men behave better when they are mound. A young man who has a good deal of spate tlmo on his hands wishes to leam of some thing that will ke < m him occupied. Well , if ho has tried trnvollnu- with a eirl whoso Ox- lord tlo Is continually coming undone , let him tackle the Job of replying to every one who nsks It It Is hot enough tor him. TVon- kers kitutesmuu , "O , Isn't it a lovely night , Adolphus ? Just fancy how de Ightlul the nlehts must be In the Orient ! The azmo blue sky , tue perfume of the ( lowers , thu tiuft tinkling " " 1 tell \ou .Mlianda. dear. I prefer the nights tiuiy lm\o In Alaska. 'I ' hev'io just Immoiiho. " "Immense , Adolphu . ' " ' -Yes , tor courting. Thoj'n ) so long , jon know , " Young women who fancy that horseback riding must bo teamed In childhood art ; 10- inhuled that the empiess of Austria , who Is oiin ot the most nccomiilishcd horsuwomcn In Kuiope , never rodii much till compara tively Into In life. Her majesty Is wid to bo nbl < ) to rldo standing on a baiebaek horse with the ease and grace of a professional , Among the many fancy bodices destined to 1m wet n this nnd the commit season arothoso ofolvet. . cut out bqimro or V-slmpo in the neck , and then draped trom thu shouldoia down with folds of mnteilal matched to the colot and kind compo.slni ? the skirt woin with the bed ce. Kvery .sort of tabrlo will bo used for these surplice folds , from French cashmere to the richest lace. Kieneh enshmoien nro exquisitely line nnd beautifully colored thm eason. Thothren popular Mades nro Suede , pale mauve nnd oreaiu. nnd the novel way ot doing them Is as linings to transparent embroldciies on cream net , ropresemini { lace. SklrUmado thus nio exquisitely gott and piotty , the boilU'o eomptocd of the cashiume , drai > ed in suiii Ice fashion , with folds ot the 01 - broldeied net. The most stylish traveling costumes for the i mitiimn season will b made of light- velsht chev.'ots , dnik-colored anil ncnlral uUmlnes , superb eamels'-hulr textiles , Kng- Kllsh bt-reus and faney tweeds , one i suit rashloiiwl in regular tailor style. Kilts , pan els mid Hat emicU generally w 111 be favored , skirt airaiiseiiiciiU with Engllsli jacket ° VCr a Cp Jj0uls llenry Wjitterson writes that the traveller In bwlt/orUnrt Is struck at onto with the beauty ofttm country und the ugliness of the women. The women appear to do all to woik. It Is not unusual to see a girl and a dog hitched to n cart and trotting alone to- jtlier like a ) > alr of ponies. The men , great trom-Ing - follows. Idle nnd ! itiiu timi lazy v loaf about sisters i till the .1 f ! ' < < ir Jvlvcs , daughters and tlelds and Bupjdy the markets. As JonuirSmlthers moved out the card ta ble , ho asked , casually : "Wheia Is tnat bilghl ffd tabo cover jou used to liavo ? I ilways I'ked ' thatr , "lvou wouldn't Ilko It now , " Interposed llftlo Tommy , "l ommT , " .said hlssl'ter Clara , "nin awav nnd play , there's a dear. " " 1 woriV answered Tomnrs : "slster'a "Slit Tommy , hush. " "Won't , " answered Tommy again. And as was hustled fiom the loom ho celled : 'Sis ter's made a petticoat onten that table cloth. " 4 Melon Colic. HYnMnufon ( 'l life. See the melon watermelon I Green ilnd and sweet ted hearted ! Set- the melon watermelon , With Its lii'clous Insldes pailedl See our Hobby happy Uol > ! > v , Full of IKIS fsh fun and frolic I SPO our Hobby I Hv the melon I lint you cannot ; the colic- Call mound to-night. DltOl'S. People who llvo In glass houses should curtains. An Irish doctor says "Raw pork should noxcrbc eaten unless cooked. " Woman's gteate .t clory Is hcrhalr , and she Oionld l > c \ cry economical of It when slio Is cooking. Texas has a new ganieot eards : ono holds the rool\er , the other the cauls. A coroner holds thu Inquest. This Is a delightful season to the steady drinker. He can swear that Iho red In ItU no-ic Is nothing but a sunburn. A Montana man saw a serpent thirty feet long gliding through the grass. He must liavo let that whiskey get a little too i ipc. What Is mnra pathetic than to see the sim ple faith with which a bald-headed man will buy an Infnlllbla hair tcbtoratlvc train a bald- headed barber ? A man recently died In a I'hllndclphla res ] tauraiitwhllo waiting lot hlsbieakfast. There me some of thu slowest pcoploln thu world at I'hll.idelphla. In India more than 100,003 ocople liavo died ol snane-blte In the last live j ears. This Is what comes to a country wlieio the whisky is too weak to run out of a jug. "This Is a A cry he.illhv place , " observed a Catsklll boarding mistress. "Yes tor chick ens" said the boarder ; "I have been heio so\ era ! hu.xsons and haven't seen a dead ono yet. " Slio took tlie hint. A book on otltiuetto informs you "how to tell a man lamer than yourself that he is a liar. " Hut the best way is to tell him through the telephone , and then go out In the coun try fora few ilajs. "A barrel wouldn't bo sulllclciit to carry you over Niagara , " said the conductor to a man who was ttylngto sprawl himself over four seats in a ciowded Passenger c.ir. "You would need a hogshead. " Norton's youngest poet Is the daughter of Col. ( inliiey , an Irishman who distinguished himself In the Into war. Shu Is twenty-live , slender , wears eu'-slasscs , and has the repu tation of being nn athlete In petticoats. "Well.llerr Yager.how do you Ilko thonew postmasiteiV" " 1 dun know out he vus pot ter as dot odder feller , \oiiiansbostmas- - ter. 1 don't any mote tedders got now as benforo , und der brice vas shoost der same. " A little fellow Il\ing In town , between three and four yeaisof age , was asked what his klttv did in a light between her and a dog , "Well , " said be , "she humped up her back as high ns she could , she mndo her tail as hie as she could , and then she blew her nose in his face. " A blind man was .sitting In company with some visitors when one ol the company lelt the loom. "What white teeth that l.uly hasl" said tlie blind man. "Why , " said a friend , in gieat surpilbe , "how can you tell' . " ' "lie- e.uiso. " answeied the blind man , "for the last hour slio has done nothing but laugh. " A siiL'gObtion has been made by a German who objects to the woid " .ipothekar" as of torciun origin that the Teutonic pharmacist should be styled " ( iesumlheitswiedeiherstel- luiigsuiittel/.iHammenmlschunkuudlgcr. " If > ou should want to send a boy to thu apothe cary's .shop In an emeigenuy the patient would bo dead befoio you could fully glvo the message. A Hostou joting man who was delegated by his sMur to buy a pair of W. < te C , coihcts , 2no. b , went into a largo dry tfoods store the other day and , with home hesitation and ner- \oiisncbs , aslced the salesgirl whopiesided over that department for the desired article. The trill si/ed him up for a moment and then replied : "They won't lit you , bir. You'll ' want two sl/es larger , at least. " An oastei 11 dm miner who was in ICnox- \lllo listened to the complaints of a moun taineer about hard times tor ten or liftecn minutes , and then observed , "Why , man , jou ought to get rich .shipidng piecn corn to tliu noithem nuiikets. " "i'es , 1 otter , " was the reply. "Vouhavo the land , 1 suppose , and e.ui get the seed' . " "Yes. " "Thuu why don't jou go Into the speculation ? " "No " icidied thn native "tho UMS , stranger. sadly , old woman Is too darned huy to do tlie plow ing and planting. " "Homely women up hero in Minnesota , " remarked a guest at one of tlie White Hear lake hotels to a fellow-occupant of the shady porch ; "now Just look at tiir.t women going down to the boat-house'.1" "Don't Ilko her looks. 1 suppose' " ' queii led the second occu pant. "Kid-headed and wearing a gown ! Why she hasn't got any taste. " "She's tiecKled. too , " continued the second speaker. "And pigeon-toed. Why nutiiio ones that woman an apology for her looks. " "And yet I once thought she was a veiy attractive " "Do know her' . " ' . girl. you asked the lii.st speaker. "Oh , yes , " replied the second ; "bho Is my wife. " Lovoln n Hammock. On the hammock p.ipa chanced to blunder , Whcie 'twas swinging in a leafy niche ; And tlie old man paused awhile to wonder Which was which. IMPH2TIKS. A Dloomlngton calf swallowed n bible the other day. Iteligion acquired that way Is apt to produce indigestion. Sunday school Teacher "Methusaleh lived nine bundled years. " Hey "That was piotty tough on his sons-in-law. " A Koston professor Is lecturing on the "Uhele.ssness of Piotanity. " Did bo ever bit his thumb-nail with a fiammct ? Sam Jones says that n man who has moro sense than religion Is u rascal , and ono with iiuno religion than sense n tool. This would keep , the majority of mankind tcaterlug on the tence most ot Uiu time. I'nrson Downs says ho is surrounded by vipers. That's justllko a viper ; never ciue.s n cent who It goes with. It's n wonder a viper has any kind of reputation left , it's so wickedly careless. ( iiurdette. "J toll you , " said a rnbld fiec-thlnUcr."tho , ide.i thnt there Is n ( Jed never como.s into my bend , " "Ah , pieolsoly Ilko my dog , " re sponded Brother Talmngo. "but ho doesn't go lound howling about It. " ( irnndslrMcrrlll was an old-tlmo saint who always blacked his boots Saturday night , and If lie found bnbbath inoiniiig that ho hud a little too much gloss on them tor a Christian , ho caiefully removed some of the bhlno before going to meeting. A man In Plttsbnrg , I'n. , Is preaching that the Lord will destroy the world In I'.HWmid all the people , because Ho hasn't any need of them , nnd He will not niakeanotlier world like It. The poor man was "born and raised" In I'ittsburg nnd never was any- wheui else. Young Man What Is 'your charge , Mr. P.iyhon. for tying the knot'/ Minister Ob , wo 11 call It SIO. Young Man -1 c u get bet ter figures from Mr. liyron. Minister \ \ ell , it's against my principles to enter Into com petition with any biotfier of tlie cloth , but on tills occasion I'll do ' It at Urother Hyion's figures. Hii ) let It bo a cash transaction , I'm tired of doing this sort of thing on time. A Lowell minister has been preaching against theatre going , card playing nnd the iibu of Intoxicating beverages. Kcgardlng these "nmtiscmcnu" ho declares that "not ono of thcao gates has oer led ono man to : i purerer , better , nobler life. " "Uut that , " nys the Hoston Herald , "proves nothing. Neither dons ait Ing onions condneo to mor ality , but peopledo eat them and prolit thereby , A Scriptural Panorama The regular lee- tiuer to the panorama being ill , hU assistant behind the scene , a Hibernian , officiated in thnt capacity ouo night. Lecturer : "This movln' scanc , irlutlcmen and ladles , ropro- sints Daniel In the lions' den. This is Dnn- iel betwixt the lions. " Auditor : "He them wild lions or circus lions1 Lecturer : "I pity the Ignorance ot the likes of yez , sor. Till * was li. 0. before circuses. " The good deacon who lets himself be per suaded by a worldly daughter to take tier down to the beach on Sunday doesn't feel entirely tree from thu qualms of conscience until no sees another good deacon whoso worldlyxtanzhtcr has persuaded him to do the same thine. And then he Is so tilled with holy astonishment that Urother Jonea should do such a tiling that he stops thinking of his own misdemeanor , and puts In Ids time wondering what the church poopla would say ifiio should glvo U lother J" "s away. DE PICKIN' O' DE COTTON. A rJ. a n vi IT Tra vter ? Dow t Million's gone , but do pumpkin bnb PO.ilC , Might ) sweet fur ter put In ilcbroM. Seedat mi jntider. big ez n kettle drum ? CM Inter rat till 1'se sick , 1'seer fred. De old hawk cries n he tiles o'er de flcl , He seed dnt p.i'tldtre whar he lit , An' he's gHie ober dar fur ter git lilse f er meal ; Ain't got no mercy , not er bit. Oh , do time fur de plckln' o * do cotton s on ban' , Prnlsu Mars' Jesus as you go dow n do row ; Oh , come along chlllun an' jlno dc happv ban' . Praise Mats'Jesus whar cbcrjergo. De a'r's mo' sudden do fall's dun bo'n , An' de erass In de orchid Is brown. An' I heads de sad rusle o' de dead b'adis o' co'n In de hush when de sun am down. De plow boss stumbles nlon' In do lot , Au' lashes his tall nt de lly DC dinner ho'u'scr blowin' , my name Is In de pot Owlnlcr ra i el wltl er sweet pertntcr pie. Oh , de time fur doplckin o' do cotton s on ban' , Pialse Mars' Jesus C7. yer go down do low ; Oh , coino nlonc chlllun nn' jlnc dc happy ban' , Prnlso Mars' Jesus whar ebor yer go. N-VTUUiYlj GU1U081TIKS. Wild cats are veiy numerous about Lyme , Conn. Hoston 1ms got a real Iho century plant In blossom In her public garden. A sunflower weighing Iho nnd one-hnlf pounds mid mensinlng thirteen inches ncioss IKIS been grown in Florida. A sea lion recently swnm In nmongst a paity of bathcis nt Chlco , Cat. lie caused somn antics that nre not In the usual course of surf bathing , but did no mischief. A fanner near Snugertles , N. Y. , has caught n double-headed untie with the date IVtfplnlnlj marked on Its back. Thereptilo can eat Voraciously with both mouths at once. Some Chinese iiilneisreccntlyfounda imp- get of gold in Sleir.x county , California , thnt weighed tr > S ounces. They .sold it for SW.OOO. This Is the third In size ot thu largest nuggets found In the \\oild. The sea seipont has been seen off Gully Point , near Hockpoit , Mass. Hownso\or ono hundred feet long ntid ns huge ns u bar rel. Ills head piesented a lioirld front , this being the traditional characteristic OL this species. An Indiana newspaper Is responsible lor the stntement that some wood-choppers In Kock Creek township , cutting down n big white oak. tound the Ueo hollow. AVlien the a\o entered the cavity the nirruslied out witli a whistle , followed by n How of coal oil. Two baircls were tilled and the hole plugged up lor fui ther use. When Mrs. W. C. DeClafTunrcld of Jasper , Kin. , went to feed her canary blid , she found it was missing , but found In Its place a hoifsc snake , which Had swallowed the blidand was unable to get out. The cage vns in the parlor and the HiiaUo had to como In there before It could get in the cane. Mrs. William Masser , the wife of a well- known clti7en of bomerset , Ky. , gave blith to three children last week Tuesday. Two of the babies weto connected by a stromr lig ament two and a half inches long , exactly similar to the bond uniting thu Siamese twins. All three childieu weio dead when born. His .Size , "liow bl ? was Alexander , pa , That people called him 'gieat ? ' " "About an ice man's sbe , my dear. When summer strikes us straight. " HKIjIGlOUS. A Young Men's Chiisttnn assoslntl on of 500 iiieuibeis has been orgunlrcd in Bombay , India. Over eight bundled conversions are 10- portcd at tlie camp meeting near Oaklai'd , III. Women me shouting themselves hoarso. Moro than SSO.OOO have been collected to erect a new church in the city ot Jerusalem , where there is no 01 phanago under the care of the Lutheran church. Bishop Tuttle expects to reniovo to St. Louis early in September , and assume clinrso of the diocese. A majority of the bishops hnvo consented to the translation. The general assembly ot the Southern Pres- bytorlnn church In the United Stntes de cided to removed the headquarters ot the homo mission committee tiom Baltimore to Atlanta , tin. Last year 218 llomau Catholic missionaries weie sent into the heathen lauds ; ot these ISO went out fipm the scmlnaiytor foreign missions in Paris to eastern Asia to till the places there which had been made vacant by persecutions. An Inter-denominational convention of ministers is now being held at Valley Camp. Pennsylvania. The objects of the meeting arc to promote gieater unity between the dlt- fcient denominations nnd to discuss ques tions nlTcctlug the icliglons nnd political llto of the people of the United Stntes. They tell of n clergyman In Lynn who hired out to n church at a nominal salary of 5-4,000 , ngiecing privately to make the church n present of Sl.OOO of it. A coiigicgntlon in Connecticut hcaid of the 54,000 pieachcr , thought he must bo extra good , ottered him -1,500 , and got him. Then thn Lynn people understood why ho pretended his salary was Sl.COO. It Is said that the /Aon Hebrew congrega tion of St. Paul hits adopted a heiolc method for testing the sciiiionlzing qualities of a candidate for the pulpit , Hols not peimltted to lire his very best sermon nt the congicga- t ion , but n committee meets him on the way to church , gives him a text , and ho Is ex pected to preach from it without notice. The Cumberland Picsbytcrlnn general as sembly condemned the use of tobacco by a vote ot llil to ! l ; nnd the Koformed i'lesbyte- rlan synod lias icaflirined Its action forbid ding anvono to be licensed to preach who uses tobacco , nnd nlso condemning raising , ninnuiacturlng and belling tobacco , and nd- vises sessions to appoint no Sunday school teacher who uses the weed. It Is reported from Paris that the Poco Is dangerously 111 and that his life Is despaired of. Leo XIII tins occupied tha Papal chair a , llttlo moro than eight years , having been elected to it at the rlno auo of 08 , after the death of Plus IX. The latter reached the ago of Si ) , and had been at the head of the Koiuan Catiiollo church thirty-two years , the longest pontlllcation In history. Thu holy father suiters from an allllctlon of the blad der , the result of his long confinement In the Vatican , but his mnlndy , though grave , causes no moro alarm to-day than It did u month ngo. At At midnight's gloomiest , darkest hour , There comes a gush of rain. The llirhtn ing Hash , ' 1 bo thunder crash In frlpht awake you , and the shower Heats herco nprninst the pane. Your wife , as scared as if u mouse Had tun beneath her gown , Shuts tight her eyes , And loudly cries : 'Oh , Ned , do go around the house And shut the windows down I" In wandering 'round you crack your toe Against a rocking chair , "Jehosaphatl" And things Ilko that You sav , although yon ought to know It's wrong to swear , EDUCATIONAL. Ot the 355 colleges of the United States 150 publish newspapers. lion. William McMaster , of Toronto , gives the Baptists of Canada another fc > 0,00j for educational purposes. ( icriuau university professors are giving serious attention to the ovlls which KIOW out of students' fondness forsubordinntingstudy for beer drinking. There has been trouble recently In the uni versity of Ann Arbor , nnd as a consequence eighteen members of the senior year hnvo been suspended for one year. This party cuds the troubln for thu tlmo being. Some ono has discovered that of the Ynssar graduates seventeen arc lOiyslclans , fifteen school principals-X ) teachers , twelve music teachers , el en on bookkeepers , six artists , four authors , three public readers and two Insur ance agents. The Waterbury , Conn. , gentlemen who has lust given S10.0JO to the industrial school of that city sets u good example to wealthy gen tlemen who mean to remember deserving In stitutions. A 510,000 endowment in cash would often be woith a § 20OCO provision In a will. , .1 , There Is iv deal of pathos In lhe spectacle , proven ted by. lite ancient college of Will am and Mary In Virginia ns it sits awaiting the linal exMn < ? tron that iriu t on come to It. Founded in low , | t U the oldest collese In America'with ' the slmcle exception of Harvard , and Its history has been noble. The tnenwst teacher on iccord nnd that means a girtit deal to the children U the one at Llecnll/ dennany , who iri\e hercl.i < s the follow inir problem for a holiday task : "From sso.r .sm deduct < wo until nothing to- mains. " 'llu > poor clrls figured ntid ticuied for hours without making much headway ; finally their tenrs attracted the ntleiitlon of the parents. A simple division will show that the tigure WJ Is contained In the larger ono no less' thfm M00w. : Allowing three deductions n minute nnd twcl\e hours' work nd.iy.lt would takeo\er six bundled dnvs to do wh.it Had been gl\eti the girls ns a holi day amu-ement. The Minneapolis board of education has elected Pi of. John K. Hrndlev. of Albany , as Riipetlntomteut of public schoolsnt 54JO a year , for n term ot three > ears. lu nn nitlelo upon Prof. Hrndleytbo AlbanyJoiirii.il thus praises him : "Of nil the prominent men In Albany , there Is none who Is moro esteemed or who has done more for thu Improvement of the rlslnir generation than Prof. John 1C. Hradley , pilnclp.do. the Albany hiih school. From the time that ho took eh.uzo ot the higher branches of education in this cltv ns principal of the now free academy in IBtJs , to the present day , his efforts to place within the reach of every young man In this city the opportunity of obtaining n tlrst-class educa tion , have oeen crowned with n most con- pleto nnd gratify Ing success. " The I'inpiro Ahcml. There's n symmetry of motion To my sympathetic notion In the pitcher as he curves the ball ; Theie's an Idyl , gieat In diction , Quite exciting as n tictioti , In tlie batter when ho llles the wnll. And the pose of ciaco and beauty Of Iho catcher doing duty , Is an epic quite exceeding all. Hut for poetrf of motion , To my unpretentious notion , Thoio Is nothing hke the umplie's sail. MUSlCAIj ANI > IHIAMA.TIC. Kiniiia Pierce w 111 bo Gus Williams' leading lady. 31Ile. Cavallazzl has boon secured as piemier dauseuse for the German opera. Cclla Alsberg and Lewis MonJson will present "Fans' and Marguerite. " Modjeska will soon visit her son , Fr.ink , who is a civil engineer in Omaha. Frank Mayo will mnstodonizo next season. Ho will have three leading ladles In bis com pany. John T. Raymond's now comedy , "A Woman Hater. " was lately well received In Denver. Richard Mansfield has booked forty-two weeks tor his "Prince Karl , " to begin at Uo - ton , on the 'Unit. A. M. Palmer's Mndison Square company opened last week .Monday nt the Baldwin , San Francisco , to n SMOO audience. During Miss Fortcscuo's American tour she will present an adaptation by Mr. Justin M'Cnitliyof Snidou's "La Malson A'euve. " ClamMouis , in an extenslvo repertoire , plays an engagement the week of September 13 , at the Uollis stieet theater. At the instigation of the Piince of Wales Carl Kosn has been elected tiustee ot the Koynl College of Music at South Kensington. Mr. Stnnton has succeeded in secuiinir the .services of , | Uo gieat German tenor , llcrr Nicmann , tortile New York Mcttopolltaii opera houso. , j Ponchlolllls [ latest opera , "Marion Do- loime , " tccontlvachicvcditru.itsuccess nt thu Constn/.a theatre , Home , with Pnntaleoni in the baritone role. Clara Moi'rls'hKys ' ' that her health Is now better than it Jhns been for > cars , and that she now dispenses with tuo senices of her plivsician altogether. Mine. Janlsch will arrive from Pails late In August uiid Immediately begin lehearslng anew society play by Sardou , which will be given Iw lirst production in Hoston. it is said that the Ameiican Opera com pany is tryingjto carry out its patriotic object by negotlnthtfjfWith Ihibenstcin to como hcie next season to djiect his opeia of "Xeio. " Uoso Coghlaii frankly says she does not expect to iimko money doing Lady Macbeth , hue she thinks the experiment may liavo u desirable Influence on hcrpiotosslonalstand- inir. inir.Tho The theatrical managers' war ngnlnst "dead-heads" has begun in Chicago , and in ono house the lollowinlT notice has bjen placed In plain view : "Xothing but the air admitted fiee. " Judic is going on a tour through Denmark and Sweden in charge of M. Shimnann. She will give fifteen pel foi malices for each of which she will receive S400 and have all load expenses paid. Emily Soldene has been engaged for Mc- Canll's opera company. It is many years since Miss Soldene displayed her charms ns Drogan In "Gcuovle\e do' Uinbnni , " at the old French theater. The popular Marie Van Xandt has been stricken with a bad form of paralysis. She Is only J3 vears of ngo , and her illness was biougnt on bv the ill treatment she leeched Irom the Parisian loughs n year ngo. Ithca's company will bccln rehearsals next week In Now Yoik city , under the dliectlon of Hen Teal. Itheu heiself sailed from Franco directly to Halifax on the 1-Uh , wnero slio will join her company and open hei tour. For his lecent benefit In London , Colonel Mnpleson's only outlay was for printing and advertising. Ho got the thentro nnd PattI ami nil bis iirtists tor nothing , nnd ho "jobbed" 83,000 out of Jho afternoon's woik. CONXUHIAIATI13S. A Dubuque ( Iowa ) young woman recently eloped with her nuislo teacher , a colored man. man.A A wcddlncr Is said to be about to take place In Ypslluiitl , Mich. , between a woman of txJ years and a man of CO years. At a wedding In GilnncII , Iowa , recently thu bridegroom was a resident of Hath , N. Y thu bride of B.\th , N. 11. , and the oili- clntlng clergyman , Dr. Muiroun , of Bath , Me. Congressman Harris , of Georgia , was mar ried on Tuesday'evening In Washington to Miss Kato V. Moses. Sucietary Lamarnnd the Georgia congressional delegation were present. Clulstlno Klllsson's marrlago with the Count do Casa-Mlninda Is likely to be post poned tor some tlmeas the Vatican has raised some difficulty about granting a dispensation , tha bridegroom elect being a Roman Catholic and the lady a Piotcstant. Byrnn Coyan , nineteen years old , got out of fall at St. Louis by mariylng Mrs , Kinma Klmmerly , a widow seventeen years oldwho hail been Ids sweethe.ut before her llrst mar- rla.'oat fifteen years of age , and whoso pie- sent condition caused her to Invoke the aid ot the law In securing n tecond husband. A Pennsylvania man has had to pay S10- COOfor bicakinit nmatiiiiionlal en agemnnt In obcdlenco to alleged advicu fiom the spirits. The HaltliuoioAmciican tliinks this should Induce lilm to cither quit consulting the splilts or to olio them for damages. A fool and his money , however , don't travel very tar to.-ethor , , The past summer's crop of stage divorces has been iitHin'iil , and includes Lewis Morri son from Hose \ \ oed , Catliailno Lewis from Oscar Arlwetlsoii , Sophie K > io from her Cal- Ifornlnn sjiousty Jennlo Yeamans from Les ter , the minsticl , Mrs. Lomoyno trom W , J. Leinoyne , Kdwln F. Miyo from his wife. Jennie ltartgeiind | ot tno suits now rl ] > on- Ingnrothos of JUIza Lout : from Chnilcs It , Welles , a lacjy who claims to bo .Mrs. Charles U Davis fiom her husband , otherwise known lor his dUplas of crystal as Alvm Joslyn. ana Laura Crawtord from James Cassldy of the variety stago. A lomantlc1 murrlago occuned In Chatta nooga lust week1 , Captain Thomas Wilkoy and Miss Lou Owen bcinz the contracting panics. The parents of the J oung lady weru oppo.scd to the match and watched her closely to prevent nn elopement. Shu mnnnced to elude them , bowlder , and tied to the suburbs , whore she was not known. Shu rented a loom , paying tor It with her jouelry. Great excitement prevailed niter her disappeniauco M.nd y , und fears were cntei tallied thnt she had met with foul pUy. Captain \Vilkey joined In a seaich for bis aftianced bride and his JK'.U ; distress was lelleved when Miss Owen managed to send him n note telling him of her whereabouts. Ho quickly pro cured i license and a minister and had the ceremony performed before any onn ot her family knew she had been tound. Mi .s Owen lemaliied In thu room without n moisel to eat for forty-eight hours in older that no ouo should see Jier , THE INGREDIENTS. A scant square foot of tlnnncl blue , Some ribbons white , A tassel And n bow or two Of colors bright ; Some apertures where arms go through , Which ribbons deek , A vacant plnw In which to view A snow ) neck ; A taper waif t that Is laced In Tight nscnnlio ; A pair ot troupers that begin Aboio tlie knee ; A Jaunty cap of colors bright As dream * oft dreamt , And stockings thnt an nnchorito Would surely tempt ; A smile s > o sweet that for Its sake \oiir-elf > oifd shoot These articles all go to m.iko A bntlilutcsulr. IiJTEKAHY NOl'KS. ' 'Shoppell's Modern llou cs , " issued by The Co-opcrat'ivo Building 1'hui As > ocia. tlon , of New York , every three months , is one of the most useful publications of the day. The Inst number Is unusually varied nml nltrnctivo in its designs and spOL'ilicntloiis of dwelling houses of the most approved plans. The plans are all drawn with a view of low cost of build ing. To tho-so who wish to keep thor oughly Informed of the rapid progress that domestic architecture is making at the present time , and to those who are inclined to cnoourago and sustain a work that carries the most practical bonellts into every community , this quarterly is indispensable. "Tho Curse of Clifton ; or , The Wid owed Bride , " by Mrs. Kinmii 1) . K N . Soiithworth , published in eheap form for thu million by T. B. Peterson & Bros. , will bo found , on perusal , by all to bo equal if not superior to nny of the pre vious works by this cclnbmtud American authoress. The romance is graphic * ami bold , possessing an absorbing interest that can attach only to real existences and life-like portraitures. The eharao tors are beautifully drawn , and the novel throughout is highly exciting and of luoraltendency. 'Iho O Judil Publishing company , of Now York , 1ms published "Tho Law of Field Snorts , " by George Putnam bmith , of the New York bar. It is a summary of thu rules of law affecting American sportsmen. The object of this little book is to provide the American sportsman with a succinct statement of the rules of law alluding him in the acquisition of his outlit and in the pursuit of gatno. Aslliu country becomes moro thickly settled and the land is more generally cultivated or inclosed , the liberty which the sports man has hitherto enjoyed of hunting or fishing where he chosu is being restricted , and a knowledge of the legal limits of private land , of the rights of its owner anil of the law of trespass , becomes moro anil moro important. A compilation of the statutes of the several states on this subject will be found in the appendix , and should be carefully read and strictly ob served by the sportsmen , and to kill game betoro the season opens or after it clones should bo doomed the act of the "pot hunter , " who in America occupies tlie position and deserves moiu than the obloquy of the poacher in Knglund. A splendid array of light , brief and seasonable articles , is oll'ored in the Au gust Brooklyn Magazine , and makes a number especially adapted for summer reading. "Hamlet's City , " by Hon. W. J. Armstrong , takes us in the most inter esting fashion through the scenes of Shakespeare's drama. Ono step , and we are situated delightfully at an American farm-house through Mrs. Sophie L. SchoncK's story of "Friend Max , " who proves to bq a young Now York lawyer in tlio disguise of n farmer. Another stop , and wo nro with Mrs. llenry Want Boechor in Liverpool listening to Glad stone's great homo-rule speech through the lirst of a series of personal letters from England by the Plymouth p'istor's wife describing her travels. Again , and we are "In a Hindu Crematory , " at Cal cutta , India. And so , ono is shifted in kaleidoscopic fashion from ono part of the world to another in the pages of this bright magazine. Nearly all the thirty and odd articles and' poems given liavo the breath of summer about their titles or toxt. Two dollars per year. The Brooklyn Magazine , 7 Murray street , Now York. Ono of the most engrossing subjects of experiment and discussion among elec tricians at the prosunt time is tin : electric motor , II.o countless uses for which , op erated by primary battery , secondary battery or dynamo-electric machine , be come daily moro apparent. America is , if anything , behind Europe in this mat ter , but electric motors are now being introduced extensively in all our largo cities , and numerous electric street rail ways are projected , or nearly completed , in addition to tlioso in highly successful operation at Baltimore , Md" . ; Windsor , Can. ; South Bend , Ind ; Montgomery , Ala. ; Minneapolis , Minn , llcnco has arisen a demand infoimatiou on this most recent application of electricity , and , to moot the want , the first American book on motors has been prepared by Messrs. T. C. Martin and J. Wo'r/lor , associate editors of the Now York Elec trical World. The worK , now going through the press , will bo a handsome quarto of some U50 pages , with about 150 illustrations , nnd will bo issued in a few weeks. The title will bo "The Electric Motor nml Its Applications. " The pub lisher is Mr. w. J. Johnston , 108-177 Potter building , Now York. ' 'A Yankee in Canton , " tin illustrated article by Win. T. Hornnday , author of that charming book of travels entitled "Two Years in a Jungle , " is the most striking article in thu August number of thu Cosmopolitan. "Tho story of Lcs- pinassu , " by Edgar Fawcctt , is a strong and interesting sketch. Professor Her bert Tuttle , of Cornell University , con tributes a timely nml lucid nrticUiontltled "Popo nnd Chancellor , " divcribing the great conflict In Germany between the church ami state. Mrs , Jane- Marsh Par ker's nrtlelo on "Mary , lemlson" Is ft thrilling sketch of a woman who. when a llttlo girl , was captured bv thn Indiana , and after growing tip lived with them all her life by preference. The number con tains four charming short stories , ono of which is by Alfonso Dnmlct , nn nblo re view of the second volume of General Grant's book , nml a poslpy article on "The KxMcil French iTlnecs. " The de partment of "Tho Young Folks" ami "The Household" are Idled with striking ami inloroMing articles. William II , Lyon has written anil pub- INhcd n timely fit tie volume en tit led "Tho People's Problem and Its Solution. " Thn object is not only to present what the writer believes to be the only peaeonblo and iionnnticnt solution ot tlie industrial problem , but also to a sist in loivlng the labor question into politics with a well delined object in view. The work does not urge the formation of a now political party , but the infu.sing of new principles into thu old parties. To a considerable extent It represents the views of the lending Knights of Labor and thoroughly endorses some of the most important principles of the order. The extrava gance , jobbery nml corruption of legisla tures and boards of aldermen are also discussed , nml a eompluto remedy sug gested by enlarging the power of Iho puoplo and restricting that of their rep resentatives. The suggestion as to how United States senators can be virtually elected by the people somewhat after the present manner of choosing the prcsi' ilent , without an nniondmout to the na tional constitution , ho believes to bo thoroughly practicable and will do away with tno present frequent disgraceful choice of United States sonaUns who. under no consideration whatever , would have been elected by the people. Mr. Lyon is his own publisher at Sioux Falls , U.ikota. WOMEN AND JOURNALISM. MLss Frances 1C. Wllluril on the No\vs- paper and Its ninkora. In brief , woman has now the opportu nity to do for journalism what slio long ngo accomplished for literature to drive , out Iho Fieliliugs ami tiio Smolletts from its lomplo ; to replace sentimentality by sontimunt : to frown upon co.irso lests , debasing inuciuloes and irreverent wit ticisms , to como into its realm as A urantuio not too hrlKlit or ( food. t'ur luiiiuin nature's diillMoo ) < l , Anil yet n snlrlt lulr nnd bright , With Mimetuhig or nu unuol's llsrlit. The dilTerunco between the smoking nnd drawing-room cars on a railway train jlhiitriUes that between average journal ism as it is and as it will bo when men and women sit at their dusks In the sanio editorial nnd reportorial sanctums. One is full of fumes , the other of perfumesi ono is a small section of chaos , tlto other of creation ; mid all because ono is < le- nnturnlixing , the other natural. The "club" will cut a sma'lor ' and the "house hold" a larger figure in the journalism of the future , indeed , t'lodillerence ' between bachelor's hall and home is in reality the ono we are trying to analyze. No truth , theological , political or economic , can bo .seen in its entirety until the stereoscopic view from thn two angles of vision , tlie mnsculinc und feminine , give it piccision nud bring it out into symmetry. Clearly enough , woman's opportunity in journalism is just what it is in the great world. Slio has a role peculiar to herself. The niche she is to till would remain empty but for' her arrival , if the best journalists bo likened unto Apollo , "the lord of the unerring bow. " then she is liis sister Diana , standing by his side ; and it thu worst Do liknncd to the "Beast , " then together they are "Beauty and the Beast. " Hather lut us call Ilium Ganymcdo and Ilubo , cup-bearers of news , noutar to tlie gods of the counting- room and parlor. Tliuy will look best side by &ido. i'o sketch a scene in the senate chamber so that its vividness shall reproduce both individuality nnd en vironment before our eyes , commend mete to Alary Clommer ; and to reproduce the line sympathy ot a conference of chan ties or a temperance convention so that it shall kindle that of the reader , give me Mary 1) ) . W illard or Mary Allen West. In all first-class doscripitivo writing by women journalists there is n pictorial quality by which their work can usually bo recognized , and a photographic clear ness in their personal portraitures. The daily press , which has become al ready the people's university , is to bo largely the pulpit and the forum of the future. Hero woman has n place to .stand , a pulpit ready from which no ec clesiastic edict can exclude her , and from which slio can comfort humanity's heart , "as one whom his mother comfortoth , " and in this forum can her weapons of argument bo sharpened lor the time when Partia shall become a llesh-aud- blood creation in the halls of justice. Pnrso7s Hrownlow'H Willow. Nashville Ainoriia-j : Tliopublioknows but l.ttlo of how vi\i'ly s'nular to tiio character of her husband is Airs. W. G. Bio widow. She would not exchange the old family residence close bv a hillside street in lCnoxilo ! for a palace. Her de light is in memories of "Mr. Brownlow" and in at tent on to her handsome and popular granddaughters , along with the widowed daughter and grandson , who rcsiue witli her. Bound conies of Brownlow's Whitr are kept in the house , and she re/ors to them with pride as exponents of the ox-gov ernor's and o.x onator's views in the most trying i eriod of our national his tory. She is of medium sive , and , though hur black hair , pnrlo I lu the old-fash ioned vvay , has liar'dly asprinUoof gray , she talks about growing old , and she don't mind telling that she is sixty-six. To nrouso a dormant liver , nnd secure the permanent regularity of tlie bowels , use Dr. J. II. McLean's Liver and Kidney Balm , MEN WHO WEAR UNIFORMS Tlio Custom of Wcnrlnc n DUttuolIro lilvAry n rotting. A quarter of a century ago , says the Now York Mall and Hxprcss , there vns n strong fooling nmonjr wage earners agaiiHl wearing nnj distinctive uniform , r.von when the proposition was lirst made to clothe the police of the city In n uni form there tvas a strong opposition by the members of the force , and ninny rill- yens sided with them. The only uniform which at all times has posse * ed an at tractive appearance is that of the mllltlu , although a sailor chid in his suit of blue is always an object of envy on the pnrtof the small boy ami of admiration on the part of 1113 older sister. The uniform .system began to grow with years. Unelo S.un'ssei vunt.s in the postal department ot the go\ eminent were obliged to don gray suits The move at llrst met with strong disapproval , but it was put into practice. Then the telegraph companies adopted n distinctive suit for tlieir messengers , the foi ry companies ordered their deckhands , pilots , bridge4emlers and ticket takers to protldo themselves with a uniform. The steam raltro-ids and horse-ear com * panics were not slow in following thh example. Thodlsliiet messenger com * panics , as each unteredlthu liuld , won ) accompanied by a small army of boys dud in blue or grav. The ticket-Inkers and guards on tlie elevated railroads had to provide themselves with a uniform be fore they began service , ami the owners or managers of the ten , eleven and twelve-story olllce buildings mid apart- ment-houses rigged their elevator attend ants , janitors , and assistants in distinct ive suits. Standing in the shade of a building on tlie west side of Bioadway u reporter saw a company of eighty men tiling out ot a doorway on the northerly front of the postollice. About twenty of them started oil'ttcioss the city hall park to ward the cast side of the city , while the others took up the mnrch along Mail street to Broadway. They divided Into two squads , some turning up Broadway and others marching two abreast down town. Clad in their nuat uniform of pray with black trimming , the men looked well with mail bugs slung on their shoul der , and tlie reporter noticed that thrco or four of the men had but one arm , Indi cating that in former years they had worn the blue livery of Uncle Sam in the field. Standing for n. few moments at the corner , the reporter mndo n note of the distinctive unlfoiins lie saw worn by men and boys. District messengers hur ried along , each wearing the livery of the company by which they were employed. The American District Messenger com pany clothes its boys in tx blue suit with trimmings of rod cord. The Mutual District Messengers wear a blue uniform with cordlugs of light blue. The suits worn by the mes sengers of the Manhattan company are similar to those woin by the American District messengers , except tlmt the jacket has a high collar and is bound with red cord. The Postal Telegraph company's boys wear a suit of blue with gold cording. The only messengers about the city wearing a gray uniform nro those employed by Hrndstrcol. The Western Union Telegraph company formerly had a small army of gray-coated messengers , but this service is now tier-1 formed ny tliu American District Telegraph - ' ' graph company. Tlie drivers of street cars have thus far resisted successfully all efforts to makb , them wear a uniform , but the conductors on all the surface rondfl wear a distinc tive suit , winch in nearly all cases is of blue. One exception is noticed , the Brooklyn roads operated by "Deacon" Iticlitirdson. The men wear n gray mil- . form It is said , however , that a change ' will soon be effected , nnd that the men will don the bluo. Gray is fast losing favor as a color for uniforms. All the regiments attached to the National guard in this city and Brooklyn , witli the exception of the 7th ami 22ml , have nban-i doncd the gray , and adopted the 'rogula-f tion blue uniform prescribed by the state. } The park police and the lettor-carrioraj still cling to the gray , however. The ] bridge policemen , the d'uards in charge of the cars on the Ivnst river bridge , those in charge of traimi on the olevnteu roads in this city and Brooklyn , as well as ticket-takers employed by the bridge trustees and the elurntod railroad com panies , wear suits of blue , with trim mings of a lighter shade. The drivers of ambulances , special agents of the 8. F. T. P. O. C , T. A , and members of the lire departments ot this city nnd Brook lyn , aroalso clad in bluo. The latest ad- ( tuition to the uniformed men is thn corps of drivers employed by the express coin- pimios. An oil'ort is being luado by Col lector Hcddcn to have the custom-house inspectors wear a uniform. Many hotels are clothing their porters and waiters 5u distinctive suits , and it is barely possible that in the course of lime newspaper re porters will no longer be able to conceal their identity in civilian suits , but will bo compelled to wear blue , brown , gray , red j or green uniform. Henry living comes over hero partly fora yachting tilp and partly to look about mm In New Yoik and see if ho cannot get a tlmatro here tor peimaucnt occupation. He has It on his mind to play part of the year In Now York and thn othorpait In London. Proposals for Bldcwalk Construction. SHAI.KD proposals will bo locolved by the umloiKljtiicd until It o'clocK a. in. Aiipr.gitli , IbbO , fortliu construction of all nlnnk BlilatruMitt ordered by the city council for the quarter ond- Imr Jiimmry 1st , 1K87. Such Hlilownlks to bo constructed acoordlnjr to pltiiis nnd Micclllutilloiis on tllo lu tbu ollloo of tlio lloniilof 1'utillo Works. Ilidsslmll bo nvcoiiipaiilud with the names of tlio studies , who In the in out of the iiwmdliiir of thu uontrnct , will outer Into bonds In tlioxiirn of ono thousand dollars for the faithful poc- lorniaiico ot Hiocontract. ' Illds will ho made upon printed blanks Jur- nlalifd by Iho hoard , Thorlglit to i eject nny or all bids la rosurvod , J. K. JlOI/riU. Chairman Hoard ot 1'ubltc Worka. Oiunun , Nob. , Aniriisl lath. 1BSO. nl'J-U-18 I d W y w ! 1510 DODGE STREET , GO TO THEM TO BUY , . \ GO TO THEM TO SELL , GO TO THEM TO RENT. Property Bought and Sold Strictly on Commission Bargains Reserved for our Customers. .