Nebraska Newspapers

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THE OMAHA DAILY BEE : MONDAY JULY II , 1881.
| THE DAILY BEE.
OMAHA PUBU8HINQ CO. , PROPRIETORS.
DIG Harnham , bet. Oth and loth Street * .
TEUMS OF SUDSCRIFTIOX !
Opy I } car , In 4i nc ( po ti U ) $10.00
oionthJ " " . . . . . . 5.00
month * " "
S.OO
RAILWAY TIME TABLE.
LRAV1.NO OMAHA XA8T OR SOCTII BOUND.
C. , D. & O. 8 & . m. 3:10 : p. m.
C. & N. W.j 0 . m. 8:40 : n. tn.
C. , U. I. k f 6 ft. in. S:40 : \ \ m.
K. C. , St. J. & C. D. , 8 A. m. 8.40 p. m. Arrho
t St. Louis &t C:25 a. in. and 7:45 : a. m.
WRIT OR BOBTHWRSTS.
D. & M. In No1 > . , Through ExiireM , S:33 : a. in.
H. & M. Lincoln Freight. 7:00 } ' . in.
V. P Egress , 12:15 : i > . in.
O. & K. V. for Lincoln , 10:20 : n. m.
O. & R. V. for Oecooh , 0:40 : & . m
U. P. Jreljtht No. 6 , 5:30 ft. tn.
V. P. freight Xo. B , 8:15 : ft. in.
U. P. freight No. 7 , 0:10 : p. m. emigrant.
V. P. freUrht No. 11 8:25 u. in.
BAST AJCD wtrrn.
C. B. ft 0. , fi 00 a. m. 7:25 : p. m.
O. & N. W.n:46 : a. m. 7:25 : \ \ in.
C. n. I. b P. . 9:45 : o. m. 9:05 p. m.
K. C. , St. Joe & C. I ] , , 7:40 : a. in. 0:45 : p. m.
W. , St. L. & P. , 10.55 ft. m. 4:25 : p. m.
ARRIVING FROM Till WKT A5D SOUtllWHt.
O. & R. V. from Lincoln 12ll'v. : ! in.
U. P. Exprc-w 3:25 : p. m.
1) ti JI. In Nob. , Through Express 1:16 : p. m
B. & JI. Lincoln Freight 8:35 : a. in.
U. P. Freight No. 10 1:40 : p. m.
No , 0 4:25 : p. in. Emigrant.
No. 8 10.60 p. m.
No 12 11:35 : . m.
O. & 11 , V , mlxcJ , ar. 4:35 : p. m.
NORTH.
Nebraska Dhlslon of the St. Paul & Sioux City
Iload.
No. 2 lcaes Omhha 8 a. m.
No. 4 1cm es Omaha 1:50 : p. m.
-No. 1 nrrhes at Omaha at 4:30 : p. tn
No. 3 arrives at Omaha nt 10.45 a. m.
DCXXr TRAINS BXTHRKX OMAHA AXD
COUNCIL iwrrs.
Leave Omaha at 800 , 0:00 : and 11:00 : ft. in. ;
1:00 : , 2:00 : , S'OO , 4-00 , 6.00 an J 0.00 p. in.
Lent o Council Illulls at 8:25 : , 0.25 , 11:25 : a. in. ;
1:25 : , 2:25 : , 3.25 , 4:25 : 5:25 : ruid 0:25 : p. in.
SunJajs The tlummy ICMCS Omaha at 0:00 :
find 11:00 : a. in. ; 2:00 : , 4:00 : and 5:00 : p. m. Lca\cs
Council Bluff * at 0:25 : and 11:25 : ami. ; 2:25 : , 4:25 :
and 5:25 : p. in.
Opening and Clotlng of Malli ,
ROOTS. OfEN. CtOSX.
B. m. p. m. a. in. p. m.
Chicago AN.V . 11.00 0:30 : 4:30 : 2:40 :
Chicago , U. I. & I'adnc 11:00 : 0.00 4:30 : 2:40 :
Chicago , 11. &Q . 11:00 : 0.00 4:30 : 2:40 :
Wabaih . 12:30 : 4:30 : 2:40 :
fiioujccitrantl Pacific. . 11:00 : 4:30 :
Union Pacific . 6:00 : 11:40 :
Omaha & R. V. . . , . 4:00 : 11:40 :
B.&M. JaNcb . 4:00 : 8:40 : 6:30 :
Omaha & North * cStcrn 4:30 : 7:30
Local malls for State of Iowa leave but once a
day , \lt : 4:30. :
A Lincoln Mall Is alee opened at 10:30 a. m.
Otllco open Sundays froul 12 m. to 1 p. m.
TU03. V. HALL P. M.
Business Directory ,
Art tmporlum.
U. ROSE'S Art Emporium , 1516 Dodge Street ,
Steel Engraving , OH Painting , Chromoa , Fancy
frames. Framing a Specialty. Low Prices.
.HONKER 1309 IViuulM Street.Good Styles.
Abitract and Real Ettato.
JOHN L. MCCAOUE , opposite Post Office.
W. R. BARTLETT 317 South 13th Street
Architect * .
.DUFKENE & MENDELSSOHN , ARCHITECTS ,
Room 14 , Crclghton Block.
A. T. LARGE Jr. , Room 2 , Cicljhton Block.
Boot * and Shoes.
JAMES DIVINE & co. ,
Fine Boota and Shoos. A good aswrmcnt of
homo work on hand , corner 12th and Haroey.
ZTUOS. ERICKSON , 8 E. cor | ICtb and Douglas.
JOHN FORTUNATUS ,
COS 10th street , manufactures to order good work
at fair prices. Repairing done.
Bed Spring * .
J. F. LARRIMER Manufacturer. 1617 Douglas st.
Books , New * and Stationery ,
J. I. FRUEHAUF 1015 Farnham Street. , ,
Butter and Eggs. *
McSHANE & SCHROEDER. the oldest B. and E.
house In Nebraska established 1875 Omaha.
CENTRAL
RESTAURANT ,
MRS. A. RYAN ,
{ southwest corner ICttmnd Dodge.
Best Board for the Money.
Satisfaction Guaranteed.
Moal3 at all Hours.
Board by the Day , Week or Month.
Good Terms for Cash.
Furnlthcd Rooms Supplied.
Carriages and < oad Wagons. '
WM. SNYDER , No. 131h 14th and Harncy Street * :
Civil Engineers nnd Surveyors.
ANDREW ROSEWATER , Crelghton Block ,
Town Sun eye , Grade and Soft erago Syiteuu a
Specialty.
Commission Merchants.
JOHN O. WIL LIB.1414 DoJgo Street.
D B. DEE1IER. For details see large Whortlsb-
ment In Dally and Weekly.
Cigars and Tobacco.
WEST & FRITSCL'ER. manufacturers of Cigars ,
.And Wholesale Dealers In To'iaccos ' , 1305 Douglas.
W. F. LORENZEN manufacturer 61410th street.
Cornice Works.
Western Cornice Works , Manufacturers Iron
Cornice , Tin , Iron and Blato Koofllnj , Orders
from any locality promptly executed In the bust
manner. Factor } and Oflico 1310 Dodge Street.
Gohanlzcd Iron Cornices , Window Caps , etc. ,
manufactured nnd put up In any part of the
country , T. S1N110LD. 410 Thirteenth street.
Crockery ,
J. BONNER 1303 Douglas street. Good lino.
Clothing and Furnishing Qoods.
GEO. H. PETERSON. Also Hate , Caps , Boots.
Shoes , Notions and Cutlery , 804 8. 10th street ;
Clothing Bought.
C. SHAW will pay highest Cash price for second
band clothln ; . Corner 10th and Tarnham.
Dei tilts.
OR. PAUL , Williams' LMock , Cor. 15th & Dodge.
Drugs , Ha'nts ' ana Oils.
KUIIH & CO. ,
Pharmacists , Fine v Ooodi , Cor , 16th anJ I
Doutlii ktreeU.
W. J. WniTEIIOUHcoUo4 Retail , lOthtt.
* C , FIELD , 0022 N < < Ui Side Cumlng1 Street.
PARR , pruifgUt. IQla'and lizard Streeto.
i DrrjQood' ' r otoni | , Etc. "
, , JQIINHJ. r/lCaUANN'it ' C0.'f
York DrytfcKkUStoro ; 1319 And 1S1C
'i' ' bimrtrceUfi ,
ld also boots and effoes',7th ! i Pacific.
I/ * i r-uruiiur * ; 'V
A F. GROSS , New and SacSnd Hand Furniture
and States , jlll'IiouclM. Illghcat cash price
paid for second banci soon ;
J. BONNEB 1300 Dougl * tt. fine goods , &e.
V Fence Work * ,
OMAlU FENCE CO.
GUST , FnJESiiCO. , lilSHaroeyHt. , Impro\e-
ed lea Jkjies , Iron and Wood. Fences , Otllco
uzs , Counters of Plnp and Walnut.
florist.
A. Donahue , plants/cut flower * , eeeds , boaucta
rcor , loth an4 bo\iq\u \ etreeU , 'j
* V Foundry. r \ '
JOHN yTEARKB { t SOMy't > or'Htb & Jtc ton ita
' ' < FlourwidFced.1'
OHAHA CITY MILLS6th ind Fahihim 8U ,
Wehbani Urof.-.ropneU > ri.
- Grocery - *
. }
2. STEVENS , tl t ; between Cuznlog add , Itard.
T. A. McSUANEJCoru. .88 injCumlpg Street * .
"
v , J , Hatter * . '
,
1S08 Dooglu s < Bcelul\ / ,
Iron and
DOLAN ft LANOWORTHYVboImle , 110 and
16th tttett.
A. Tjquoa O0ft > trl6th > ndCalUoroUi
HarrtM * , Saddle * , &c.
B. WEI3T 20 IStt &t , Ut Fan * & Buo r ,
at and Bonnet Bleteher * .
LadlM gtt yoni a'nw , Chip and Felt IUU ilone
up M northeast corner Seventeenth and Capitol
A enne. WM. DOVE Proprietor.
Hotel * .
CANnELDHOUSEGeJ. Canfleld.Oth A Famh m
DORAN 1IOUSK , P. It. Cory , 913 Farnham St.
SLAVKN'S HOTEL , F. Slavtn , 10th Strwt
Southern Hotel Qua. hatncl , Oth & Lcarcnnorth.
ron rencing.
The Wwtern Cornice Works , Agent * for the
Champion Iron Fence &c , , ha o on hind all kinds
of Fancy Iron Fences , Cresting ! , FJncals , lUlllnp' .
etc. 1310 Doilgo stret. aplj
.
Intelligence Office.
MRS. L1Z21E BKXT 217 ICth Street.
jewellers ,
JOHN BAUMER 1314 Farnham Street.
Junk ,
II. BfRTHOLD , lUrsand Mttal.
Lumber , Lime and Cement.
FOSTER & OKAV corntr Blh and Douglas St .
Lamps and Ulauware ,
J. BONNEU 1309 Dowlas St. Good Variety.
Merchant Tailors , .
0. A. LINDQUEST ,
One of our most popular .Mcrchint Tailors Is re
ceding the latest designs for Spring and Summer
Goods for gentlemens "ear. Stjllih , durable ,
and urlccs low as e cr 215 ISth bet.Doiit.&Fani ! (
Millinery.
MRS. 0. A. RISOER , Wholesale andJlctAll. Fan. ,
cy bootlt In great x arlety , Zeph > rs , Canl Itb rds ,
lloelrry , Oloicrt , Corsets , Ac. Cheapest House In
the \Viet. Purchasers MMJ SO per cent. Order
bv Mall. 115 Fifteenth Street.
Physicians and Surgeon * .
W , S. OIBUS , M. D. , eom No. 4 , Crelghton
Block , 15tli Street.
A. S. LEISE.NR1NG , M. D. Masonic Block.
C. L. HART , M. D. , Kt and Ear , opp. postofflco
DR. L. aO'lADDY ,
OcultltMid Aurist.'s. W 15th and'Farnham Sts. ,
otograpners.
GEO. HEVN. PROP. ,
Grand Central Gallerv ,
212 Sixteenth Street ,
near Masonic Hall. First-class Work and Prompt *
ness gua ran tceu.
Plumbing , Gas and Steam Fitting.
P. W. TARPY A , CO. , 210 12th St. , bet. Farnham
and Douglas. Worn promptly attended to.
D. FITZPATRICK , 1409 Douglas Street.
Painting and Paper Hanging ,
HENRY A. "ASTERS. 1412 Dodge Street.
Planing Mill.
A. MOVER , manufacturer of Both , door * , bllndi ,
moldings , ncnuls , alustcrs , hand rails , furnishing
scroll sawing , &c. , cor. Dodge and Oth streets.
Pawnbroker * .
J. ROSENFELD , 322 10th St , bet. Far. & liar. .
' '
Refrigerators , Cnnfleld's Patent.
C. F. GOODMAN llth St. bet. Farn. & Harney.
Show Case Manufactory. )
0. J. WILDE ,
Manufacturer and Dcalcrf In all kinds of Show
Cases , Upright Cases , a > . , 1317 Case St.
FRANK L. GERHAKD , proprietor Omaha
Show Case manufactory , SIS South 10th street ,
between Lcatemrorth and Marcy. All goods
warranted first-class.
Stoves ana Tinware.
' ' A. BURME3TER ,
Dealer In Stove * and Tinware , and Manufacturer
of Tin Roofs and all kluds of Building Work ,
Odd Fellows' Block.
J. BONNER. 1309 DouzUs St. Good and Cheap.
Seeds.
J. EVANS , Wholesale and Retail Seed Drills and
Cultivators , Odd Fellows' ilall.
Shoo Stores.
Phillip Lang , 1S20 Farnham St. , bet 13th & I4th.
Second Hand Store.
PERKINS fc LEAR. 1410 Doujlas St. . New and
Second Hand Furniture , House Furnishing Goods ,
c. , bauyht and told on narrow marrlns.
Saloons.
IIENRY.Jb'AUFit/NN ,
n th new brlcKlJlock on Douglas Street , baa '
Just opened a most elegant Ecu Ilall.
not Lunch from 10 to 12
V everyday.
* l tf 4Xf\5IT >
has re-opcneU a neat and comulcto establishment
whichboning FIRE.and MotherShlpton's Proph
ecy , will be opcncd.tor the boys nlth Hot Lunch
on and otter present date. '
" Caledonia " J. FALCONER. 670 ICth Street.
Undertakers.
CHAS. RIEWE , 101 * Farnham bet 10th & lltd. [
P. PEMNCR , 303J Tenth street , between Farn
ham and Harncy. Does good and cheap work.
00 ucnt Stores.
HENRY FOHLMAN , torn , notions , iilctuioa
] ewolr'i &c. , 618 14th bet. Farnham and Douglas
P. O. BACKUS. 1205 Farnhnm St. . Fancy floods
Geo. P. Bern is
REAL ESTATE AGENCY ,
ISth nnd Dodge Sts. , Omaha , Neb.
This offcncy does STRICTLYn hrokcrago btuinoaj.
Docs not sjicculato , and therefore any bargains
on 1U books are Insured to Its patrons , Instead
of being ; gobbled u ; > by the aent. .
BOGGS & HILL , l :
REAL ESTATE BROKERS.
No. 1508 Fnnxliam Street ,
OFPIOB North side , eon Grand Central Hotel.
v.rro , ' Ltwia RKHJ.
BYRON REED & CO.
[ OLD8ET rSTABLlallED i '
Eeal Estate Agency
IN NEBRASKA
Keep a complete abstract of title to all Real
Estate In Omaha and Douirlas county. maytf
DexterL.Tlioinag&Bro ,
WILL BUY AND SELL
AND ALL TRANSACTION
CONNECTED TIIEREWrril.
Pay Taxes , Bent Houses , Etc , '
IP YOU WANT TO HIT OS BELL
Call at Office , Room 8 , Crel8'hton Block/Omaha.
ap5-d
Neteh Land Agency
DAVIS & SNYDER ,
IB05 Farnhnm 8t. , . . . Omaha , Nebraska.
3bOOOOO A.CXCOEIS
Oarofully selected land In Eastern Nebraska for
sale , Great Ilargalns In Improved farms , and
Omaha Uty proj > erty
0. F. DAVIS. WEDSTEIl BNYDEH.
UtoLanJCom'r U.P.H. It , 4pfbtf
John G. Jacobs I1
( Formerly of OlihAi Jacob * , )
UNDERTAKER.
No. 1417 Farnham St. , Old BUnd of Jacob Ola.
Telegraph Solicited. ap27-ly
Business College ,
THE GREAT WESTERN
CEO. R. RATHBUN , Principal.
drejghton Block , '
OMAHA , NEBRASKA. ;
Wflctri for Circular , t > oy.20d3cwt <
SAM CLEMENS.
A Gambler' * Storr Abont the Hn-
morist's Lllo In Ncvmliv.
San Francisco Chronicle.
Milling camp journnlism is crowded
with experiences the city newspaper
I wets not of. Ho of the mining
' journal know * nothing of "details , "
"boats " " " " "
, "scoops , "watches. early
or late ; or of "boiling , " "Amplifying ,
' 'shooting rot " nnd other
_ . , many ex
igencies , requirements and necessities
connected with the lot of the city
newspaper man. Talking with a mem
bci of his fraternity from the auriferous
Oil regions , n Chronicle reporter the
other evening heard the following
story about two ell-known Nevada
characters :
I met them in Aurora , Nov. , about' I '
three years ago when that mining
camp \vas in the first Hush of its second
attack of the quartz fever. Long Bill ,
11 had learned , was a well disposed and
amiable citir.cn who dealt in faro in
good times and inducted the guileless
Piutes , in the Hysterics of poker and
other ethics of a higher civilization in
the interims , in return wherefor they
supplied his larder with quail and rab
bit and his purse with such scarce
coins as they could steal. Hearing ,
nisi , that ho had "cabined" wifli
Mark Twain when that self-accused
humorist wafc a luckless prospector in
the hills of Nevada , I was pleased to
fun him my companion one day on the
outside scat of the Boclio sta o.
"You know Mark Twain ? " 1 suggested
cd to my companion when ho had loft
the town , and the horses liad settled
into their dreary , between-station
jog. "
"Sam Clemens ? "
"Yes , I believe ho was called that
then. "
"Wasn't that "
his name ?
"So it was. "
"Yes. I know Sam. Cabined with
him in ( G2 , or , mebbo , " 03. "
"I suppose Mark"
"Samf1
"Sam was very popular hero ; jolly ,
nnd all that , eh ? "
"Well , no , I can't say Sam was
very popular with the boys hero ,
though , . ho did cabin with me. Ho
kinder had a way of forgetting the
boys who staked him that didn't ' vash
well. Sam was the means , though ,
nnd it waa rather curious , too , of mak
ing the most unpopular man , in town
popular. "
"How waa that ? "
"Wall , you aoo Cluggago ho owned
the stage line between hore'n Carson ,
and ho played it rather low down on
the boys ; brought 'omiu hero for 825 ,
and charged 'em § 75 to return. When
the boys got broke , which they most
ly did , for they would play agin the
bank , it was a pretty touqh game to
get out of town. Well , Sam ho
wanted to go back to some of his
folks In Carson , but somehow ho
couldn't see Cluggago's limit. That
was the state of the game when it was
given out one night that Gluggago
had presented Sain with a free pass to
Carson . , You never saw anything like
the way Cluggage rose in favor that
night { , and the next morning half the
town was down to the stage oiTico nnd
gave the driver a big cheer when the
stage , with Sam inside , pulled out. "
Wo rode on in silence for some time
after tht t , liilo I considered Billy's
6f T rrtfVmOtTrpoinfa"Of ! Vjow"ui
til just as 'wo entered a broad portion
of the canon , dignified by the name of
"Sunshine- Valley , " when Bill asked
mi : "You nro the new editor , ain't
you ? "
. I glowed a little and blushed becom
ingly , I trust , for I was not unwilling
to officially announce that I was no
longer a reporter. k
"I am the now editor. "
Bill was again silent until wo reach
ed the center otf the "valley , " when ,
pointing to a little clump of bushes ,
no slowly remarked ;
"Wo killed the last editor over
there. "
I ceased to glow , and no longer
blushed. I recovered enough to make
a desperate attempt nt , factiousness ,
and askfed :
"Where was the ono before the last
killed ? "
"Oh , ho waa killed back in town in
a bar-room light ; but the one before
him : , who was the first , wasn't killed. "
"That was too bad. ' '
"Yes ; the follow ho odbnded meant
well , but only shot him through the
ankle. Some do say as how he died
from the shot , but ho 'lived four
months nnd took in considerable
whisky all the time , I say it's giving
too much credit to the buckshot to say
ho died from the wpund. "
"Prussian Iioddor. " i
New Orleans Ti rac . |
If there is a merchant in Nov
Orleans who can sell goods nt at.y
nricu ho chooses to fix on them , Rube
Holi'onstoin , who keens a clothing
and shoo1 store on Poydras street , is
the man.
A few days ago a customer entered
his establishment and inquired ;
"Ilnvo you got any low-quarter
gaiters ? "
"Certainly , my front. I hat any
sdylo you wish , und somoding dot
vas neat. Now here vas n pair uf
gaiters vat is madouf Prussian loddor ,
do nest kind , dat vas known , und I
dinks doy vill suit you. Subboso you
dry dom on. "
"All right , " replied the customer.
"Voit , my front , und I'll put a loo-
dlo powder in. Now dry dem Ah ?
vat { totter she you vant dan dat. It
vits shust is if somopody takes your
measure. "
"It's too tight across the instep I M
said the customer- rubbing the spot
with his fingers.
"It vill sdrcch , my dear sir , " re
plied UofTonstoin , persuasively , "dat !
tedder vas made expressly for stretch
ing. "
"But the shoo pinches my toes '
also. "
"Dot is noding , it vill go vay the
first time it gets vets. You don't ' vant
to buy a pair uf shoes more as droo
sizes too big und go around do ladies
mit your feet looking like a group uf
railroad scrapers , It vould be a ehamo ,
you know. '
"What do you ask for the shoes ? "
"Only seer dollars. "
"Jerusalem 1 That's too much , "
"Veil , my dear sir , you must recol
lect dat dom shoes vas made of Prus
sian ladder , and leddcr derp vaa scarce.
My undo ' yat Ji/s dcro write ane last
veek' und said dat ( odder vas so scajco
doy don't ' make harness mit jt any
longer. All da harness .dv'ro la now
made of wool. " <
"I tell you what III do , " eald the ;
| customer , examining the shoo closely ,
"I'll civo you four dollars. "
"My fj.r-r-acious ! n Prussianledder
shoo for four dollars von it costs mo
more as five dollars und fifty cents
laid at the depot down , und do profit
on dom don't pay for the gas. My
g-r-r-acious , vat's do matter mit do
boople ? '
' "Well , I'm not going to give six
dollars ! for those shoes. " said the
customer , moving towards the door ,
"they are not worth it. "
"Nell , my front , tnko them along
for feur dollars , und call around again
some oder day. '
The customer paid for the shoes and
taking his parcel'left the store.
"Herman , " inquired HoH'enstein of
his clerk , "vat vas the costbricoofl
dem . sbtet horsc-leddcr shoes I shust
sold do shontloman ? "
"Von dollar und a half , air. "
"My n-r-r-aciuus , Herman , dink
how small do brolit vas. If pisncss ,
you know , Herman , don't got petter
it vill preak all the store up. "
Ho Wnutoil Pnrtloulnm
Yesterday nftornoon n pompous
looking colored man , wearing n veter
an's badge over his heart , encountered
in front of the City Hall a brother of
color wearing a small llag on his coat
and trying to look as if ho had starv
ed in Andersonvillo for a year nnd a
half.
"Stop , sah stop ! " commanded the
first. "Aro you a wetoran , sah ? ' '
"I spccts 1 nr ! " was the reply.
"You war' in de army , sah ?
"Yes , sah. "
"War you a cook or a wnsiu driv
er ? "
"No , sah ! I war' in do ranks ! " was
the indignant reply. "I war' right dar
at Petersburg. "
I'Waitin' on do hospital } "
"No , sah ! "
"In do commissary department ? " I
"No , sah ! I war' m de h\'ht. "
"Behind n log ? "
"No , sah ! "
"Did you have n gun ? "
"Yes , sah ! "
' War' it loaded ? "
"Yes , sail ! "
"An ] you fired it ouT
"I did , sah of I did. "
j. urn , ouiij ; Ui course A uiu
"Was it pinted nt do sky ? "
"No , sah ; it was pinted at'do i in-
cmy. "
"Do butt-end fo1 most ? "
"No. sah ! "
"An ! it "
went off ?
"Yes , sah. "
"An1 do inomy dropped ? "
"I can't say as to dat , sah. "
"What ! you down dar'shootin'jaway
Uncle Sam's powder nn' lead widout
hittin' anybody ? Take off dat Hag ,
sah ! What bizness has you to come
out among dis crowd an' purtcnd dat
you saved do Union , when you war'
eatin" fo' dollars' worf of grub per
week an' shootin" witl yor eyes shot ?
Go away , sah ! It war'some sich chick
en as you dat shot off my heel in dat
same battle , just as I had surrounded
n hull rebel rigimont. Stan' back ,
sah doan talk to a genwine old wot-
cran , sail ? "
A Smart Boy-
Virginia ( Nov. ) nntu
"Tumble down out'n dat cheer , "
said Undo Moso , addressing himself
to n 5-year-old boy lolling in the chair
of the bootblackjitq d r , uC3 .git . ri hr
down out'n dat stan. You ain't got '
no business up dar nohow , and hyar's
n cash customer , I specks , " said the
old follow , cocldng a somewhat tloubt-
ful eye upon the reporter.
"That's a fine boy , uncle , is ho
yours ? " sniiHho reporter , ns the lim
ber limbed young monkey swung him
self out over the side of the boot
black "stan , " nnd dropped to the
lloor.
"I speck so , leastwise dat's wat do
ole woman says. YouAbumLinkurii , "
addressing himself to the boy , "what
fur yo' sot dar on do ilo' rollin up yo'
eyes dat nwny ? Got uj > on yo' stool
dar in de co'nor dis nunit , an' 'have
yo' ' sof. Tnko dem fingers gut'n ' yo'
mouf an' quit'or pullin1 dom dick'Ius
faces. Yas , " turning to the reporter ,
"dat'a my boy , an" ho is a chip o1 do
ole J block. Spec I was just such
anoddcr little imp when I was his
size. "
"Ho'll ' have n much bettor chance
in life than over you had , Undo Moso.
No slavery now. Ho can go to school
and ] hnvo as good n show as the white
b6ys. "
"Dat'a " cried Uncle Moso
so , ear
nestly , "an1 you bet I keeps him down
to his wuk at the oddicatlon business
o' nights when I nm nt homo. He's
got a chnnco wet I never had , nn' I
specs I'll ' make Biillin' out'n him yit.
Vo' , Abum , don't ' I tolo yo' stop pull-
in' dom nr' sort o' faces ? Putty fix
yo'd bo in of yo' fnco stay dat nr'
yW "
way.
"Can ho read , Undo Moso ? "
"Can ho read ? Yn ! ya ! Uat's good.
Can dat boy read ? Ya ! ya ! What ho
bin goin' to skulo fur deso free rs ?
Ho roads to his ole fnddor and mud- ;
dn't
dor every night oh dar lifo , Doesn't
yor , Abum ? "
"Yes , daddy. "
"I toll yo' , sah , dat boy's n great
comfo't to mo nn1 do olu woman , long
o' his readin' to us o' nights. Hits
company for us too. Lor' brcss yo1 I
salt , wo sot fur hours nn' hours n-fis-
tenin1 to dat boy while ho road. Hjt's
great comfo't nn' a blessin' to hnvo
one in do family wn't kin read.
' Does ho read the Bible to you ,
Uncle Moso ? "
"No , hits not the Bible ; leastwise
ho liasn't done read hit to ns yit. Ho
reads us do wat-you-call-um ?
' No ; not do Fits' , Header. Hits [
sumfin' ' like do FUH' ' Header , still hits
not y-ackiy do Fus * Header , but after
nil I specks phe's putty much the
" 0 , it must bq the Second Reader ;
is that it ; is it the Second Header ? "
'Well ' , Bah , hit soun' n little dat ar
way ; hit's not porzactly do Sccum
Header. "
' 'lH ' it a primer , uncle ! "
f"Dat do spun' aomufin' like it , sah.
e'ro a gittin' ncah it we'roagittin' ;
noah it , sah ! 'Spec wo'H fetch Tier do
next clatter. Cun't bo fur off now.
It must bo next doah to do what
waa do name of dat las' one what
yo call off , Bah ? "
"Dat'a do fuller. Hit must be next
doah to licr. Anyhow hits right long
dar in do name row and not a half a
block away at the very fuddcrest. '
Blame my ole puttons wat now is dis
yor wat ho reads to roe an' his' old
mammy ever bleaaed night ! ( striking
Ilia clenched fut upou Ida forehead , )
I jiat knock dia ole fool head oil' , I
sjct ao mad cos I can't fink of dat wat
ilo boy read so fine all de time. Wat
is dis. Abum Linktin , wat yo roads
to yo ole parents over night ? "
"Tho alfabct , daddy. "
"Oats her' ' Yah ! yah ! I know'd '
we'd fetch her pooty soon. We was
ju n grazin'of her when wo struck do
primer. Dai's hit , do nlforbockl I
hain't sot him onto de Bible an' dom
odder - onoa yit , but I specks we'll
tackle 'em fo long , won wo gits ready.
Hut wo ain't cot no hankorin' ' for dom
yet. ! Do nlferbock's BO fine , nnd com-
fortin' , nnd mooving lik , dat wo don't
like to part with her. Bless yo , sah ,
wo's got so used to her dat wo dos
nat'ly ; ' goes asleep over her every night ,
mammy nnd me. "
|
Cnlloil Her Puts-
St. Ixmli Globe Democrat.
Yesterday WRS n gala day in the re
corder's otlico. Couple after couple
from all port ions of the west , Borencly
faced the handsome clerk who has
been assigned to the marriage license
bureau , and suffered the necessary in
quisition. About 3 o'clock in the af
ternoon a young workman , with over
alls , checkered shirt , and slouched hat.
sidled up to n deputy recorder ami
confidentially whispered :
"Is this where n foliar gcta his mar-
ryin' papers ? "
"This is the place , " replied the
clerk *
"Well , I want somo'papers. "
"All right , sir ; whore's the lady ? "
"Lady ! What lady ? "
"Why , the young woman you intend
to marry. "
"Oh ! she's at homo , of course. "
"Well , wo can'i. issue a license
without certain information about the
lady. "
1mW "I cau toll you all about her.
What do yon want to know1 ?
"Her Hnmo , age , residence , nnd
such like facts ; nnd I presume you
can't answer all the questions. "
"C.xn'tl ! Just try mo. "
"Innocent nrtlossnoss , " murmured
the clerk ; "how old is she ? "
"She told mo she oas just 10 years
old. "
"Then I'll wager she is 29. What
artless innocence , " thu clerk whis
pered. "What is her first name ? "
"I was trying to think. "
"Jli the meantime what is her last
namoJ"
"I don't exactly remember that ,
either. In fact , I don't think I over
heard it. But I suppose it's of no
consequence. "
"Good heavens , man ! What on
earth do you call her ? "
"Well , I calls her puss , but I never
thought to aak if that was her ro'al
' '
namo.
There was an audible snicker
throughout the recorder's olllco , and
the candidate was advised to bring
his engaged partner for further par
ticulars.
Brotbor Gardner's .
Llsuo-Kilu Club.
There was crape on the bear trap as
the janitor opened the doors to admit
the crowd. No ono could say who was
missing , and every eye was turned up
on the President as ho arose nnd said :
"Two nights ago at midnight I cavr
Brudder Kynn Jones take leave of
airth to cross do dark ribber. De ole
man had bin * ailin1 fur weeks ; an' ho
was ready to go. When his eyes look-
lUof dtrdliflTeloUd'ol "deal IfmT
ootcjiod sight of do nigos of Honven lie
gathered his friends about him an' wo
sot beside him when his lifo went out.
If dar am n man in dis hall who believes -
lievos wid Bob Ingorsoll lie should
hnvo bin dar when do soul of dat poo'
ole black man began slippin' away
from its homo of clay. What brought
do smile of joy to do ole man's face ?
What put do look of blessed Batiafuck-
shun in his eye ? Why did ho welcome
de coinin' of dat sleep which knows no
wakin' till do blast of do trumpet
tuma airth into Paradise ?
"Way down in do rice fields of
Louisiana lies do body of his ole wife
Dat smile of joy was bo'n at do
thought of tneetin' her at do gate of
Heaven. In n green lane in Georgia
lies-do dust of his first bo'n chile.
Dat look cum to his eyes when ho
realized dat bofo' in his arms. In do
y'ars of the long ngo doy took his dar
ter away , an1 ho has never hoard from
her since. AVhon ho thought of do
blessed family reunion up dar' behind
the gates of ggld his face woru sich a
look dat wo could almost1 h'nr do
music of do harps. Toll me of some
unbeliever who has died away ! Toll
mo of n scoffer who has lot go of lifo
wid a mnilo on his facu ! All do words
of all do infidels on airth could'nt ' hnvo
slmkuu do faith of dat poo' old man.
Ho could not road , but he could pray ,
lie could not write , but ho could
hppo. Jist bofo' de bells struck mid
night , wo saw his smile brighten , an *
ho pintod wid his finger into distance.
Shall I tell you what do old man saw !
Ho saw beyond do curtain which
hangs boiwcon lifo an' eternity , Ho
say legions upon legions an' hosts
upon hosts mnrchin' down to do dark
ribbor. Ho saw boyand dat. Ho saw
do sunlight on do odder blio. ' Ilo
heard music. Ho saw do wife mi *
chiU'on of odder dnyo , an' when doy
held out deir arm lo him ho whispered
to us : "Doy is callin' doy iscallin' ?
an' ho sunk uway widout oven "
Incredible.
V. A. Scratch , dnnrslBt , Huthvcn , Out. ,
write * : "I tm\u tliu grcatent coiifldeucu
In your IluimocK Jli.oon UITTKIIS , In ono
caxa with which 1 am peranimllyacmiaiiititl , l
their Hucci'hH \ \ in uliuost incredible . Ono
lady toM mo Jtlint half n bottle did her
inoro gotxl than huiidrvdn of ilollnrti' worth
ot inudicitie elie had 'previously taken , "
Price 11.00 ; trial Bite 10 ccuU.
jylloodlw
A Single Stouo
from a running brook slow the giant
Goliath , aiul millions of noble men
since that time hnvo died frrim a lu
gle utonw in the bladder , which ll r-
ner's Safe Kidney and Liver rue
would have devolved and carried
away. JJy7-ood-lw
FARMERS AND MECHANICS.
If you wish to avoid great danger
and trouble , besides a no small biil of
at this season pf the year ,
you vhould take prompt stop * to k > oi
disuaso from your household. Thu
syntunl should bo cleansed , blood puri
fied , stomach and bowola regulated ,
and prevent and euro diseases arising
from spring malaria. Wo know of
notliing that will BO perfectly and
surely do this as Electric Bitters , and
at thp t riling coat of fifty cents a bo- $
tlo.-rfExcluuigo ,
Bold By leh & McMaJion. (1) ( )
Omaha , A /Collins/
/ , . . /
f * '
* f -i- t.
*
Cheyenne , Colorado.
Spring and Summer
CLOTHING ! !
LATE AND NOBBY STYLES
FOR MEN , BOYS AND CHILDREN.
Hats , Caps , Trunks , Valises. ,
XkX OJDXl TO
IN THE LATEST STVLES.
Satisfaction Guaranteed. Prices to Suit all (
1322 FARNHAM STREET ,
NEAR FOURTEENTH.
THE GREAT WESTERN CLOTHING HOUSE.
M. HELLMAN & CO , , ;
Spring Suits ! All Styles !
IMMENSE'STOCK'AT WHOLESALE AND RETAIL. '
Tlie Largest Clothing House lest of CMca
A Department for Children's Clothing.
W6 have now ttn assortmenf ; of Clothing of all kinds , Gent's \
Furnishing Goods in great variety.and a heavy stock of Trunks ,
Valises , Hats , Caps , &c. These goods are fresh , purchased from
the manufacturers , and vail be sold at prices lower than , over'
before made '
iWe Sell for Cash and Have but One Price.
A large TAILORING FORCE is employed by us , "and we make
SUITS TO ORDER on very short notice.
O.A.T.X. X3XrX > 83EUO ITS.
130 ! and 1303 Farnham St. , cor.
MAX MEYER & CO ,
TOBACCONISTS.
Tobacco from"25c. per pound upwards.
Pipes from 25c. per dozen upwards.
Cigarsfrom $15.00 per 1,000 upwards.
J. B. Detwiler's
CARPET
The largest Stock and Most Com
plete Assortment in
The West.
> ,
. *
. ' , . t if j j - . ,
j'
We K ep Everything in the Line of Carpets , Oil
cloths , Matting , Window-shades , ' Fixtures
and Lace Curtains. ' '
,
* *
WE HAVE GOODS TO PLEASE EVERYBODY.
11313 Farnham St. , Omaha.