6
THE 11 ESPE R IAN.
and want, stalk side by side, and that as one thrives and
grows fair, the hidcousness of the other grows more gaunt
and grim, as the few go up the many arc pushed lower
down. If he is right, civilization is a failure, inventive gen
ius and progress in mechanism must crush millions
The savage in his hut, with his club and dugout, his helpless
ness against wind and tide, his alternate gorging and starving
has a better life than the modem workingman, whose
poor existence, as Mr. George seems to think, tends down
wards with our progress in wealth and invention."
HALL HAPPENINGS.
. Hydrant!
Russell is back.
Regents arc in session.
Polk has been sick again and they say Vrtsick.
The cadets go to their annual spring encampment next Fri
day.
Paul Hcfllcman left on a surveying trip into Kansas last
week.
F. A. Stuflfleft lately for Wyoming where he accepts a po
sition as a topographer.
Miss Cornell was called home to Syracuse by reason of the
illness of some relatives.
Harry Hcfllcmcn wus compelled to leave school on account
of declining health. We hope he will recruit enough to be
with us in the fall.
LaMastrr came into the sanctum the other day and began
fooling with the office cat. It scratched him, and now he is
going to leave school and go to Paris to see Pasteur.
The Seniors finally brought Ev. Eddy to time and raided
the Eddy ranch last Tuesday evening. They made up for
their long waiting by doing things up in approved shape.
We learn that Mr. J. Gilbert White has resigned from the
faculty with the intention of going into electrical engineer
ing. Mr. White's field of labor will extend over Nebraska,
Kansas, Wyoming, Colorado and Dakota. We feel sure that
we express the general sentiment in assuring him that his res
ignation is deeply regretted by all.
The Junior class in Italian are now wrestling with the in
nocent things called irregular verbs. Several members of the
class, whose nerves were not equal to the strain, have had to
be carried out on shutters and placed under the pump until a
reaction set in. Brace up, class, and don't let a little puny
Italian verb destroy your equanimity. "I'll brave'M, revised
though hell itself do yawn,"ctc.
If there is any man in the University who hates drill it is
Dave. Each day about ten minutes after the bell has rung he
comes tumbling into our office to change his toat. The other
day when the mud was one foot deep he was wicked enough
to offer $5 to any one who would insure rain within five min
utes. Brace up, Dave, your country may call for an exhibi
tion of your fighting capacity some day.
Wc arc exceedingly sorry to hear that Mr. Geisthardt has
resigned his position as instructor in Modern Languages. Mr.
Geisthardt proposes to practice law in Lincoln, and" will take
formal leave ol the University at the close of the present
term. Wc do not like to speak on our own responsibility, but
there is a very wide spread rumor that a cerU in black-eyed
Miss is at the bottom of the affair. Miss fears that the
charms of the University belles are exerting too powerful an
influence. Hence this thusness.
Prof. McMillan's daughter, Miss Bertha, has been ill.
Miss Edith Russell visited University friends last week.
Paul Clark manages the base ball club for another season.
Spurlock has been kept from work by a severe burn receiv
ed in the laboratory.
E. D. Howe was called home a week ago last Friday on ac
count of the sickness of his mother.
Miss Dcna Loomis has had quite a severe attack of scarlet
fever but is now on the road to recovery.
Wc were honored by a brief visit from the rising young
prohibitionist, Mt Farmer, of the class of '90, one day last
week.
Miss Stratton spent a few days in Omaha last week, visiting
her brother and looking up dry goods stores with a view to
Commencement.
Earnest Crippen has left school because of poor health and
will devote his time entirely to his ministerial work, having
charge of the church at Emerald.
Say, Gerwig, do you still adhere to that statement you
made some time ago? You remember what it is; "There
are more pretty girls to the square inch in Pittsburg than in all
Nebraska." Huh?
The rain last Friday brought about the union of the Palla
ttfan and Union societies. The program was composed of
members from each society. The evening, considering the
weather, passed off very pleasantly.
The athletic association met Saturday, May 8th, and deter
mined upon the members of the University nine. The fol
lowing was the result: C. W. Bigclow, c, Logan Stcphcns.p.,
Dave Reavis, ss., Will Marsh, ib., M. I. Bigclow, 2b., T. S.
Allen, 3b., E. E. Huling, rf., Joe Mallalicu, cf., J. F. Ly
ons, If.
A few days ago some of the preps while out botanizing
stumbled upon some specimens which, Professor Bessey assur
ed them, arc entirely new to science. Just our lu;k! Here we
have been toiling along for years in the vain endeavor to se
cure a little useful knowledge, and a preparatory walks out in
the gloaming and picks up fame. "A fool for luck."
Alas! Alas! Have we been deceived? The other evening
three forms were observed sitting on the east steps of the Un
vcrsity, which on closer inspection proved to be Elton Ful
mer, Dean Smith, and Luke Cheney. Two of the professors
came around the corner, whereupon our friends decamped.
Next morning several cards with spots on them were seen ly
ing near the aforesaid steps. We leave you to draw.your own
conclusions.
Quite a number of the students availed themselves of the
opportunity of seeing and hearing Gen. Lew Wallace lecture
upon the Turks. Many of the boys had the good taste to se
cure ladies for the occasion, but there wcie also a few, we re
gret to say, who ensconced themselves in tht silent recesses
of the gallery, where they could not be seen by those below.
Such penuriousness ill becomes you, ye "busted" seeker af
ter knowledge.
Upon request ot the management ot the cadet band we
announce that a new selection will be rendered
at dress parade next Friday afternoon. This is done to allow
preparation lor the unusual nervous shock which will undoubt
edly follow such an unprecedented occurrence.
Latkr. We arc informed that the above announcement is
a vile slander. Some villain, apparently intended to perpe
trate a cruel joke.