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About Hesperian student / (Lincoln [Neb.]) 1872-1885 | View Entire Issue (April 15, 1887)
TlfE HESPERIAN. newcd a Sophomore has succeeded in unravelling many of the problems that for ages seemed beyond the .mind of man wonderful theories of mind, thought, leing, are set forth in eloquent language, every word and gesture calculated to make still grander the great truths. Our'discoursc, to be concise, rc will divide into three parts under these headings: (i). The Journey! (2). The Object- (3), The Sequel. Jack and Jill . Went up the hill. In the first place Jack and Jill went; Jack didn't go alone, neither did Jill. They did right in following the scriptures. Gen. 2:iS. If it were in modern times Jack would tug along with two pails, while Jill entertained her gentleman friends, or went to the theater. But maybe Jack might meet all the other Jacks and go to hear Maggie Mitchell, while all the poor Jills, who had had their hair frizzed and got a new dtess for the occasion, were tacitly invited to entertain trig, for the ev ening. Yes, and there were more tears than sines and cosines 011 the paper. However, we don't want to be bard on the Jacks; wc have heard of expeditions, feasts, chips and then some lovely gowns float before our mental vision, some haugh ty faces, upturned noses, as several Jills sail into society. The thought is plain, axiomatic Jack and Jill should go togeth er. Jack goes first, for 'modesty is woman's courage,' !esidcs if there are any stones or obstacles ol an)' kind in the road, he must, ol course, remove them. Hut suppose Jack is a darling little Frcshie. Yoa big Soph. Jill, it is jour duly to protect him, in the absence of mamma. They went up the hill, not down into a puddle for their water, but way up where a bright spring bubbled. That is the reason why Byron or George Elliot I don't recollect which aapvay it was some great man said, "There's al ways room at the top," because nobody, or only a few, get there. Yet the good is there, dear friends, and so let us press forward, faithfully performing each duty allotted to us, so that gradually wc shall rise until on Pisgah's heigh we are just without the gate of heaven, and all the world be neath us! Yet it is an immutable law that he who flunks day after day, fills the margin with translations, skips recitations to go on a bum, or talks on the stairs, he who thinks it smart to cruelly quiz an innocentutor.to pass daily the Hesperian office and never remember his subscription, yea, when it is his turn in society, thinks it brilliant to have a sore throat , he, he is the villain, and will, as he deserves, though having start ed for the clear spring, stumble and roll clear down, scratch a few eyes out, knock off a dozen patches of skin, smash his nose, and land finally in the mud puddle where the rest of the dead beats like him are passing their miserable existence here. Jack and Jill Went up the bill, To fetch a pail of letter. They went after something. Yes, and they walked like it too. They didn't perambulate, like a certain tall Soph, and sweet preppy go home to dinner. Yesterday, as I was medi tating upon the cause and effect in the rise and fall of empire I was rudely awakened. They passed my room. Had they walked as fast as they talked they would have been swifter than Pegasus, They walked $0 slowly that my thoughts, all forsook me and my eyes turned instinctively in search of Cynthia and '.'beautiful starlight." Poor Jack and Jill didn't get there. Oh, the cruelty of late! So merrily and eagerly they set out, and now failure. Poor Jack! Perhaps his crown was too heavy. Misfortune loves a shining mark. That brings to mind a dear friend who after cramming for forty-eight hours steadily, and saying to every one that nothing was expected, as it was not conscientions to ' cram, (a mental reservation of '9s or die,' meanwhile) and was rewarded for arduous labor by this title: . : FINAL EXAMINATION 70 I ..... Surely, O Jill, thy woes are the common fate of all. Then a tiny bird told me of a sweet co-ed two bitter enemies who were to call a pair of cuff bullous, five cigars, and a bunch oftoolhpicks, the price of an introduction loud rap co-ed appears hasty retreat of a rascal. Ohit is too touching, my heart o'erflows- "A weary time of longings unfulfilled, And this is life!" Be palicnt.and you will reach the top Jack and Jill Went up the hilL HALL HAPPENINGS. Have you heard Rca vis roll? Bert Woods enters ,90 again. Ask the girls how to breathe! Captain Gerwig, if you please. Have you watched the awkward squads? Mathewson is an adept a, stealing barrels. Cadets arc to be inspected about May 1st- Oar friend Guy does not seem to materialize. Briggs sports a new hat, of a color for contrast. Beach is back again and. to stay a while, be says. Cora Fisher, 'S6, has accepted a school near Raymond. Miss Minnie Jtoycr teaches school at Malcolm this spring. Club No. 3 is no more. Died from lack of funds and cook. Miss Josic Young is acting as a country schoolmarra this term. Miss Lottie Pollard has returned to school after a lengthy absence. Miss Wilder, of Kansas University, was a visitor with us last week. D. T.Smith spent most of his vacation nursing a pet upon his upper lip. Bert Clark was accompanied to Lincoln by his mother who made a short stay. Miss Dryden, who spent the vacation in town, made a fly ing visit to Sutton to see Miss Clark. Last issue seems to have used up the energy of the board, judging from the way copy was handed in. The Seniors proved so obstreperous last term that the Chancellor has turned them over to Tutor CaldwelL Fulmer has parted company with that long flowing mane excuse us beard, which has so long been the pride of every co-ed. The University boys seemed to take a greater interest in the election this spring than ever before. A large number voted, but many of them were challenged. Whcclock sported that same old upper lip ornament around the halls for a few days. They say he handles cash over the counter in a bank at Blue Springs, whither he moved from Beatrice. t
