THE HESPERIAN STUDENT.
his im"soph"l8ticntccl remark that he pulled out his big
jack -knife, opened n, laid it in the pnlm of his right hand
with the blade toward himself, and pointing with his left
hand to his heart, he pressed the Prop to end his miseries.
The Prop did not faint ; he did not even turn pale and
stagger; nay, even lie was not abashed, but looking his
enemy calmly in the eye, he murmured the magic syl
lables, "Not this eve." Pkep.
gmnytis mjartls.
Happy new year.
May you never Hunk this year.
Welcome again to the collcgiato fold.
But pass in all things from euchre down.
Master Willie has gone home to cat turkey witn his
ma.
We are glad to announce that our Chancellor is much
better.
The University has sent its Can an to Kansas to cele
brate the holidays.
The smiling face of Sam English, an old lime student,
was noticed at the joint social.
Wo extend our greeting to the now student and recom
mend his pocket book to our bus. mau's tender mercies
Mnnley's latest production in art is a magnificent
realistic painting of the retreat of tho celebrated ten
thousand.
Tho weather is regular Christmas weather. The mer
cury has run way below tho conditioned preps' examina
tion marks.
For tho very latest in skating call on tho mauaging ed
itor who if not at his offlco will ho found gliding up and
down Salt Creek.
This issue makes its appearance umlci auspicious cir
cumstances. Almost all the editors are gone. Hence
look out for something wonderful.
The Philodicoan poet made a song. That song was
sung. Twenty-five members of the Philodicean society
want to with draw if ho writes another.
Snow one half incli deep; just enough to spoil the
skating. Again I say unto you, give thanks; for if you
cun't skate you won't sprain your ankle.
All students who could afford it without pawning their
over-coats have went home to eat Chrifitmas chicken pie
and gel their stocking filled with candy and cold.
Sophomore history class in open-mouthed wonder
What was tho subject of Mr. '8 theme? Disconso-
late professor. Well name it and yon can have it.
Of tho faculty who assisted tho young idea heavenward
when Lieutenant Dudley formerly commanded our bat
talian but two remain to welcome him back to his old
post.
Tho skating rink does not seem to Buffer from tho fail
ures and rumors of failures that make the rest of human,
ity look askance at the student when he enters their
places of business. No, they arc running on a cash basis
hence they are solid. Let all students endeavor to run
on a cash basis next term and pay in their subs to tho
TUDENT.
A discount will he allowed Univorsity students enter
ing Lincoln business College. An hour por day in Boole
Keeping, Penmanship or Short Hand can bo profitably
spent.
Tho literary societies, as usual, aro waiting with open
arms to embrace tho new student, receive him into their
midst and apply his initiation fee to "our funded debt
you know."
The professor in higher mathematics after lecturing tho
class on being prompt at tho first of tho term gave thorn
an examination for tho first day. Wo doubt thoir
promptness.
Mai lory has gone home to take care of his father's
stock farm for two or three weeks. Ho will bo engaged
in foddering cattle, herding geese and other such indus
trial employment.
By tho way, this paper may not bo out till after the and
of this mundane sphere's existence. If it don't we'll
promise to send it to our old subscribers as soon as wo
get acclimated in our tropical abode.
Some of tho members of tho higher algebra class mean
to tret there. At their final examination two of them
stayed so long that tho piotessor took a recess and wont
to his dinner. They worked till three p. si.
A noble Senior delivered an unsurpassed lecture on
Diocletian before tho Sophomore history class lately.
Tho lecture is now in print and can be found complete in
the fourth chapter of Arnold's "Provincial Adminis
tration." The second term of the Eustorduy vocal music class
opened at tho Y. M. 0. A. rooms Monday evening, Jan.5,
1885. Special attention given to sight reading aud
rendering Choruses and Glees. Tuition for term often
weeks $1.00.
Another Uncle Tom's Cabin coining to town. What
fun it will be for the first Prop. Come to think of it, ye
local rather thinks that Uncle Tom makes his annual visit
for tho express purpose of showing tho Props how torldo
donkeys and ponies.
This paper is intended for a New Year's present to you.
If you don't get it till next May, receive it even tltcn
gladly and with thankfulness of heart for you will thou
road matter only six months dead, and Hint's not so old as
some college literature.
Wo have five students who are making thoir mark as
expounders of law. Hal I igan as a judge; Will O. Jones
as a bull-dozer; W. E. Johnson us an orator; S. D. Kil
len as a cross questioner; O. B. Polk lis a traducor of tho
character of his opponents.
Wo have a pretty little hand painted schedule of "copy
due" hanging on our offlco wall. All editors aro careful
never to raise their eyes from tho nearest crack in tho floor
while accidentally happening in the office. Honco tho
Student is always out on time.
Students for the lovo of your country, for tho lovo of a
high moral and social tono in our young and growing
institution, 'subscribe for the Student. These hard
times are pressing the bus. man. to tho wall and if ho
gets no money very, very soon a fluaucial crash will fol
low. Don't subscribe and forgot to pay. P. B. Those
who aro in arrears are cordially invited to call and sottlo.
