T HE II E S P E U I A N S T U D E N T.
The rush of students to tho library every
iiiDinlng nt nine o'clock and aaln Inline
illiilely atter eliitpel Is something to bo
inarkt d. Their conduct in tho library is
qtiiit ami studious and shows bow the
privilege of u retreat in the morning hours
is appreciated.
The next Palladhii preliminary spout
occurs two weeks from next Friday eve.
niug. Tins question is an extremely bim
plo 01. e Free Trade. It is repoited that
two nl the prospective debaters are crazy
nlruudy, and the remaining ones ilnd it
iliillcult to retain their mental equilib.
riiiin.
Two joung ladies hud been singing to
tin co oung gentlemen. As two of the
gentlemen aie about leaving, third young
gentleman picks up the music and inno
cently exclaims, "Why, this is a queer
change; live Hats to throe sharps." The
two young gentlemen went out and closed
the door.
One of our editors in-chief, Mr. Snell,
is teaching the elementary botany during
I'rol. Aughey's protracted absence. "How
ilo you like him as n teacher " we asked
11 hnght.eyed coed in that class. "Oh,
ever ho much," she replied. "Do you call
him ' Prolebsor' ? " "No, wo call him
'Darling.' "
Professor Church has commenced an
elective course in ancient ttoman law.
The class begins, with tho Commentaries
of Gains do Instilutionom Juris Civilis,
with references to Blaekntono. Gains was
one of the very curliest of the ltoniiui com.
mentators and to htudy from him is to
obtain a vciy line foundation for all law
study
Prof. Aughey lias of late been engaged
In .several geological expeditions to dillor
ent parts of the slate. The frequent calls
upon him for this work and for analyzing
various substances show his services to lie
very valuable and appreciated. Student
forAnril. 1873. Tho Professor's services
nre still very valuable and appreciated.
The boya mu&t brush up their uniforms
mil' prepare to lake hold of drill as soon
us the time arrives with the greatest vigor,
for this is the last oppoitunily they will
I'uve of learning tho art military under
Commandant Webster. Drill will probn
uly commence soon after April first. Tho
Student hopes to see many new faces in
Hie ranks.
The genial "Tubby" suddenly made
Ms appearance among us lust week.
When wo speak of "Tubby" wo must
explain to tho outside world that wo moan
J- II. Parker, Esq., who hails from Kansas
City, but who was formerly a hornlst in
the Cadet Band, while employed as oper.
ator in the W. U. telegraph olllco in Lin
coin. Tubby was very much welcomed.
It is really delightlul to hear the now
music teacher warble every morning
Her silvery notes lloat forth from the first
lloor music room and charm the ears of
the weary student, who, rejuvinated by
their vigor and sweetness, vows anew his
love for song and finds dull lessons gilded
for an hour.
The peculiarly Palliiiliau institution
known as " Girl's niuht" comes this year
on the 24th the last meeting before tho
recess. The young ladies compose the
class, furnish the music, and, in short,
have exclusive control of tho society for
that evening. A fine programme may bo
expected as tho girls have taken hold of
the matter with great enthusiasm. It is
even said that they will arrange a
"slate" for the occcaslon.
The old debt which has been hanging
over tho Student for the past four years
is now cleared entirely oil' and we stand
on a solid, paying basis. The bill was
one of $4!$ 00 to the State Journal com.
pany for pi inting, and one winch tho
present board was under no obligations to
pay save the dictum of newspaper oti
quctto. Wo now look forward to a "div
idend," a sinking fund and new type.
The inner walls of the Univursity are
becoming more shocking than ever with
tobacco spit and obscene pencillings. In
tho third hall, around the hell-rope, are
written some most vile verses with indo.
cent pictures. Again tho Student asks
that the Faculty climb up to that lloor and
soo what certain miserable scapegraces in
tho preparatory department and Junior
class have placed upon tho cnlcomine.
At tlto meottng of the Hesperian club
of Donne college last Friday evening, the
challenge of tho Palladians of the Uni-
rsity was accepted and a full ticket of
contestants elected. Tho list is as follows :
For orator, II. II. Avery; for essayist
J. B Show; for doluto, F. B. Stephens;
for recitation, Miss Grace Andrews. The
Hesperhms asked to have the time for tho
contest fixed for May 12th, and it will
como off at Crete. Journal.
"God bless the ladies! "Without tho
dear girls what a cheerless, dreary waste
wore life I All I eternal sun, ah 1 ovcrlast
ing fairy moon, what wore your enkind
ling rays, or mild, soul inspiring beams,
without tho soft radiance of woman's
smilot Wo have always loved tho girls,
alasl wofear too fondly tor our spiritual'
welfare. They have made a polythelst of
us; for in each 0110 wo seo a divinity en
shrined." Wo find this apostrophe to tho
tenderer sex in the editorial columns of
an old Student, when Geo. E. Howard
was editor-in-chief. That's "worsor"
than anything wo have in tho Student
nowadays. Does tho Professor still fool
Hint way
That hit on "Oss car Wild,'' in a late
number of tho Student, was almost
spoiled by an intelligent printer at tho
Journal ofilce, who found the cut of tho
car upside down, (as wo intended it to be,)
and put it in its natural position. Ho
probably thought ho was doing us a favor.
He wasn't. The car wouldn't have looked
wild a bit if tho manager of our office
had not taken a hatchet and cut delicate
lines across its side, chipping off the
driver's right leg and half the roof. Wo
put a great deal of thought into that en
graving and it would have been a pity to
have sacrificed the pun.
The co-eds who rattle around In this
institution have a groat fondness for
poetry. They worship it. Scraps of
poems and ingenious rhymjngs may be
found copied and pasted in tho text-books
of nearly every girl in the University.
The following from tho fiy leaf of a Latin
Grammar belonging to one of them, shows
talent akin to inspiration:
' Mnry hint 11 vncclno nciib
Upon lior snow white nrm,
She wnrned tier bonu to UiIh effect,
For fear he'd ilo It hnrm.
Hut when they eiiino to part that night,
She gave n mighty grab,
Anil whispered "Hug mo nwful tight,
Ami never inhul tho Hcab."
The best joke of tho semester is on tho
local editor of tho Student, and in tho
absence of that individual the intelligent
compositor feels it his duly to make the
mailer public. The local generally goes
home on Saturdays. Last week he made
all necessary preparations for the journey,
packed his grlp-sack and brought it over
to the University, and went to a recitation.
During tho hour three students who are
sadly in need of Y. M. 0. A. influences
opened said grip, abstracted tho contents,
and filled up with an old pillow and a
quantity of rags and paper. The scene at
homo when tho young man opened the
valise to show his father a new volume of
Oscar Wilde's poems is said to have been
heart rending.
"Professor, did I understand you to say
that tho Hcracleuin Umbellillous is a,
native of tho Rocky mountains? " "Yes
I found and classified 17 varieties of this
species. Once when climbing a precipice
2000 feet high in search of Muriatlcus
Uristus I camo upon an enormous speci
men. Ho was perhaps twenty feet long.
Taking a stone I killed tho animal and
buried him very carefully and marked tho
spot. In tho spring I shall exhume tho
skeleton and bring it to tho University,
It is one of tho finest specimens of Poly
morphus Rhlzomu Africannus Whizzo
loric in the country, and bears a close
resemblance to the famous Scobiform,,
Bofarious Chrysosplouium Ammoblum of
tho PycoostachyB epoch. What futher
docs tho author say?"
k
X.
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