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HESPERIAN STUDENT.
UNIVERSITY OF NEBRASKA.
Vol.X.
LINCOLN, NEBRASKA, FEBRUARV 1, 1882.
No. IX.
egfliscclkwit.
THE JUNIOR.
Once upon an evening dreary, while I pondered
weak and weary,
Over many u smnll but awful volume or tha Uer
muu lore,
While I nodded, nearly napping, suddenly there
camo a tapping,
At of some one gently rapping, rapping at my
chamber door.
"Tls some second Prep," I muttered, " come to
read his Latin o'er,
Only this aud nothing more."
Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the bleak
December,
Aud In the German class each member n length
ened vieHge wore.
Terribly I feared the morrow, vainly I had Bought
to borrow
From my pony ease from Borrow, sorrow lor my
Kinking score,
For that low and beastly marking, which an
angul'd call a boit,
Nameless here forevcrmore.
Aud the oil-cloth, blackly shining from my dic
tionary's binding,
Thrilled me, tilled mo with a dread of German I
had never felt before;
So that now to stop the throbbing of the genuers
wildly bobblug
Through a cranium full of endings cranium level
full aud more,
"'Tisbomo second Prep," I muttered, "tupping
at iu) chamber door;
That it is, and nothing more."
Presently the blows grew, stronger; hesitating
then no longer,
"Prep," said I, "or Freshman, truly, your forgive-
iit-ts I implore;
But the fact is, I was cramming, and so wildly you
camo jamming,
And o fiercely you camo slamming up against my
chamber door,
That I scarce waH sure I wlsh'd jou enter now
ami shut tho door.1'
Silence there and nothing more.
Fiercely of my German thinking, long I sat there,
winking, blinking
At my dictionary's binding which tho lamplight
gloated o'er;
Rut the silence was unbroken, aud tho stillness
gave no token.
And the only words there spoketi were tho whis
pered words u a bore! "
Thcje whispered, and an e:ho murmured back
the words, "a bore!"
Merely this and nothing more.
Uick unto my Gorman turning, with my foot tho
coal-hod spurning;
Soon again I heard tho pounding, muchly louder
than before.
"Surely," said I, "Surely that'a a bona fid8
caller,
Let mo see who dorl he ram Is, and throw open
now my door, .
Let my German rost a minute, and this mystery
oxploio;
Tis some Prop, If nothing more
Opon hero I Hung tho portal, when iu stepped a
grinning mortal
Iu thero strode a lordly Junior who had been thera
oft beforo.
Not tho least obcisauce made he, not n moment
stopped or stayed he,
But suns meiu of lord or lady, perched boforo my
chamber door,
Perched upon a rounded chair back Just beforo my
chamber door
Perched and sat and grinned galore.
Tho n this lengthy chap beguiling my sad fancy
into smiling,
By the wide and awful chasm in tho countenance
ho wore,
"Though thy grin be grown and growing, thou,"
said I, "art mighty knowing;
Spito of nil thy gas nnd blowing 'bout this awfu1
German bore,
Tel) me what my future futo Is, shall I pass in
Dutch some more?"
Quoth thu Junior, "Nevermore."
Much I trembled this facetious youth to hear
dlecourso so plainly,
Though.hls answer weighed but little little rel
evancy boro;
For wo cannot help agreeing that no living hu
man being,
Ever yet was blessed with seeing Juniors 'foro
his chamber door,
Junior on a rounded chulr-back, Just beforo his
chamber door,
With such u grin as this one wore.
Dutthe Junior Fitting lonely on that chair-back
answered only
That ono word, as If in that one word a Joke ho
did out-pour.
Nothing further then he i.ttorcd, to the floor my
scratch book fluttered,
And I something more fian muttered, "Those
Prof, hates ho's bounced before!
On tho morrow ho will puss me; other fools lmvo
passed beforo!"
Grinned tho Junior, "Nevermore."
Then mothought thu air grow denser, tilled us
from an unseen censer,
Scattering round exceptions to the rules I'd
learned beforo.
"Wretch," I cried, "the Prof, hath lent thee, by
tho great John Smith, he's sent thee,
From tho 'torturo room' he's sent thee, Just to
make ua study more;
Stop, oh, stop this ghastly Joking and forget this
Gorman borel "
Quoth tho Junior, "Nevermore !"
"Man," cried I, "foretelling evil, grlnulng still
like any devil I
Whether mallco prompts or only a desire to bore,
Hopeless now, yet all undaunted, toll this brain
by Germau haunted,
Dy each twisted phrase epchantcd toll mo truly,
I implore,
me, I implore I"
Grinned thu Junior, "Novermorol "
"Man," cried I, ''foretelling evil! grinning still
like any dovlll- '
By tho fate that's hanging o'er us, by that grado
we both implore,
Sooth tliis brain with German laden, say that by
some hook in tradlu'
Latin, learned a wholu decado in, I may dodge this
German boro;
Dodge this great and dire nflllctlun, dodge this
fearful German boro? "
Grinned tho Junior, "Nevermore I "
"Be that word," I shrieked upstarting, "bo that
word our sign of partiug;
Got the hence, nnd gut thco hencor, through this
town's madonlan gore,
Leave no hoof-track as n token of tho lie thy lips
have spoken!
Leave my cramming spell unbroken! quit that
chair before my door;
Take thy hoofs from out that chair-seat, nnd'thy
ears through yonder door! "
Grinned ho muchly, "Novermorol "
And the Junior still mo twitting, still Is sitting.
Htlll Is sitting,
On that rounded, sharpened chair-back, just be
foro my chamber door;
And his eyes have all thu seeming of i teacher
who is scheming
(While tho Devil's on him beaming), where ho daro
cut down our score;
And my "curd" to what I want It, and my grade
tho fifties o'er
Shall bo marked Nevermore !
I'ulladlan Absentee.
A 11EMIXISCENCE.
How dear to my heart Is ihe school I attended!
And how I remember so dlstuntand dim,
The red-headed Bill and the ptu that I bonded
And carefully put on tho bunch under him!
Aud now I recall tho surpriso of tho master
When Bill gavo a yell and sprang up from tho pin
bo high that his bullet-head busted the plaster
Above, und the scholars all sot up a grin.
That ectlvo boy Billy! that high leaping Billy!
That loud-shouting Billy that sat on a pin!
The Oiuulm Herald has the following
summitry of tho U. S. cotisus "Tabic of
Illiteracy:" Of those over ton yuars of
age who cannot reuil, Nebraska has tho
smallest percentage, 1.78 ; New Mexico
the highest. 44.31, while the average is
11.82, which Virginia approaches nearest
with a percentage of 8.41. Tho percentage
of tho population over ten years of age
who cannot -write is lowest in Nebraska,
being 2.55; while Nev Mexico has 47.80
and "West Virgtnia again strikes nearest
the average vlth a percentage of 13.80, the
Is there, ll there hope of passlngS-tell me-tell I average being 12,14.