JjXf , T U K H B 8 1 B K I A N S T U D E N T.
. ,- w.. ...,. ..v.. i,.u uiuvi 10 auuuii wuiu. SLnntlfi
M
I
)
ono cheek when tlio other is struck wore,
print tlio following from the Collegian
and Ncoltrian leaving each one to form
his own opinion of the intention of so un.
ohuritiiblo un atliick, for It is evident thin
the pretended mistake is only meant ag a
thin cover for so much malice. But
"squeal?" Oh no have indeed too chris-
tiau a disposition to do Unit!
"Somewhere in the wild prairies of the
west, where the wolf howls on the hill,
side, and where the wild btiil'ulo roams
unhurt, where the Indian rears Ills wig.
warn, and "shoots his arrows to the sun,"
where trees grow not but wheic the rank
thistle nods in the breeze, there seems to
have sprung up, (how, by what means, or
for wind purpose we know not,) a Miner
vu shiine to which the noble name, Uni-
versuy.is applied. .Just at what place on
this round globe this mighty emblem of
civilization is situated, just what order of
beings assemble in its walls, just what
tilings are done there, it is impossible for
us to say, but one tiling wo know and
this is.u precious little sheet, the IIkspeii
ian Siudent by name, comes to us fnun
these remote regions. Now this child ,f
Iho west doesn't look as wo would expect
a youth to look who had hud Iho wild
Holds to roam in, but mote like u sickly
bubo thul had never loll the nurse's arms.
Every tune we touch the infant we expect
to hear a squeal; but no, it either doesn't
know enough, or has too good a disposi.
lion to exhibit human nature. Some one
has said uppcuruuoo.-. are deceiving. This
was the case with the diminutive Alexan
der Pope and we judge it is the case w itli
this little dwarf, for the lirst words we
we saw upon looking at its columns were
"prognostics presaged a timely issue of
tlio Studknt." Such learned words inter,
ested us and we were induced to follow
down I lie lines. But that awful lament
after stolen type was too pathetic and we
turned away with heavy heart. We then
glanced at the lirst page of Iho paper
where we found a poem called The Rail
toad Holocaust, and we wore richly- re
paid; for in the midst of this wisliy
washy common place there shown forth
this brilliant noetic star in a manner that
uslonishcd us. Although the lliomo was
old, jet the rhythm nd expression wore
all that could he desired. The article
entitled "Evolution, the Law of Progress"
contains numerous fallacious statements,
and plainly showed that he never consid
ered the objections which the scholar
ship of iMcCosh Bowue, and others lias
brought to beat on the question The
various departments ol the paper are all
poorly managed and do in l show the lab
or ilium the part ol tlio editors that should
bo expended. We have another exchange
of the same name as tho one mentioned
above which hails from the State Univer
sity of Nebraska, aim is in all respects
worty of commendation.
Summer.
June bugs
Make way for tho Seniors.
Nobby Straw Hats at Ewing & Co.'s
Straw Hats in great variety ut tlio now
hat store.
Visit Ewing & Co.'s emporium for fine
clothing.
Tlio Oudol Bund now plays or the drill
three limes per week.
Nobby Scurfs and White Vests at Ew
ing & Co.'s.
Straw hats worth from 2,"5o(8 to 5.00
ut tho now hut store.
Visit Ewing & Co.'s lor Huts and
Furnishing Goods.
A tull line of Gents' Furnishing Goods
at tlio new hat store.
For a clear iluvumm Dime Oigar call
ut Wholteinado and Wolf's.
The very lutesl styles of nookwuro
the new. hat store.
at
liWinQS,
"Pinafore" lias been translated into
Russian, and JJuttercup will appear on the
bills us "Cliurncroaniolcowski." JUx.
Sixteen yjurs trom next fall the iiioom
ingstiident will wonder whether ho be
longs to the class of one hundred or of
double zero. Vine la 00.i!x.
Darwin acknowledges himself sold
when his little niece asked him seriously
what a cut bus that no oilier unimal lias
and lie gave it up after mature doliboni.
1 lion uiid then Iho sly Utile puss answered
'kittens."
University Collogo,London, was attend
ed by two thousand students, including
two hundred and eleven ladies, during
tlio past your, its lirst your of coeduca
tion. Tho percentage of failure among
the women was 10.0; among the men,
Uf.
I '
t
, 1.4
Tlio Palludiuu strawberry festival was a
financial and social success. Proceeds:
lots of enjoyment and $.")4.
The heartfelt sympathies of the students
are extended to Professor Church in his
ccent domestic bereavement.
Manilla Huts Mnckina Hats, Milan
Hats, French Chip, and Lima Edge Huts
at the now hat store.
The University Addiess this year by
Chancellor Hammond of the Iowa Law
College promises to be a rare tieat.
Ilcmcmlicr Your Friends!
Buy your groceries, cigars and tocaecos
of W. W. English, on 11th St. near N.
Tlr.' Seniors are through with their ox
animations and have been let out to grass
a few duys'propuratory to their final effort.
The Freshmen have finished Trench
and arc spending tlio last few days of the
term in tlio study of Chaucerian English.
If you want a Ilavana-filled flvo cent
cigar, call for Iho celebrated "W. W."
manufactured by WoltomudoAs Wolf.
Tho University Cudots'uckuowlcdgo tho
receipt of an invitation to attend Decora
tion services. Thanks gentlemen; we ac
cept. It is enough to make a preacher luugh
to see the U. O. 13. go through their num.
Olivers under tlio command of the drum
major.
Why is it that our Seniors are looking so
'pale around the gills"lalcly Y Stagefrighl
is beginning to effect them. Courage, faint
heart I
Dont forgot that Hermuiico & Cook
huve reduced prices on Groceries from
live to ten per cent. Cull ut once to got
prices.
The Socrutic philosophy bus been con
densed by a Greek btudent and put into
Socrates' mouth as follows: "Only those
who know that they don't know anything,
know anything. I know that I don't
know anything; therefore I do know any-thing."
It is interesting to note how assiduous,
ly tho Juniors Imitate the dignified bear
ing of the Seniors. Tlioy uro preparing
for promotion.
Tho largest assortment of Meerschaum
and Briar pipes, mid a full stock of
moklngand chewing tobacco at Woll.
omuilo & Wolf's.
Boys I Visit R Ilermingliaus and try
the University and Capitol Cigars. Ho
makes a specially of fine tobaccos, sinolc
or's articles.
Nearly every Saturday iho Cadets go
out to the hill north of town for target
practice. Some hit tlio bull's.oyo, others
miss the hill.
Call on Wilbur Snow for ice cream,
confectionery, cigars, etc.; also a good
circulating library. Opera House build-
ing.
Tlio cadets made more racket firing
blank cartridges tlio other day than any
one who never heard so much noise bo
fore ever heard.
Wo hope a word to the wise is suillcient.
Dave, will you please return what you
used for a pillow this term, our typos are
yery poor spellors.
Is not there something in the Book,
News, Periodical, or Toy lino today If
so Clason can supply Cull on him South
Side O St. bet. 10 und 11.
Rumor bus it that one of our number
Is going to allow Hymen to ensnare him
before many weeks huve passed. May
he wear the toils lightly.
Fifteen i of tlio Dormitory girls wont
down to un ice croum parlor last Saturday
ufioriioon, and kept fifteen freezers busy
from two o'clock till ten.
Next Tuesday afternoon the cadets have
their annual review before the Regents.
A great many blank cartridges will be
wasted . Everybody invited to attend.
A sudden religious zeal has seized our
students. The question, "Did y on go to
church last Sunday evening V" has been
asked at least tf.OOO times during tlio past
week.
We beg leave to inform our reader that
it rained hero lust week; it did actually
ruin, und in Lincoln. Extra copies con
taining this notice may bo hud ut this of
fice ut the usual price.
There will be a shooting tournament
before tlio term closes, in the form of a
mutch between the two companies. A
team of six or eight will be chosen from"
eacli company.
"Suodgrusb' Patent Button Hole" which
wo recommended to members of tho soci
eties, we are proud to announce, bus met
with unparalleled success. Tho bulbdoz
orb huvo largely collapsed.
The campus daily bears the appear
anccof a rancho. To have horses teth
ered all over our otherwise beautiful
grounds does not lend u very scholastic
appearance to Nebraska's seat of learning.
A certain aspiring student was recently
hoard to say that the University was the
best place to prepare tho hands for cold
weather of any ho had seen. How brazen I
A.nd how sure a sign that he had got loft.
file usual announcements, that an old
friend wishes to see all the students who
"want a soft job for tho summer vacation"
was received with enthusiasui by tho
Preps, moro calmly by tho Freshies, and
with haughty scorn by the Juniors.
Tt would bo a pious plan for the Re
gents to have a few more hitching posts
erected just outside tlio campus. So
many horsos tied to tlio front steps and to
the lightning rods of the University re
mind one of a horso market.
Ye Local is about to get hliusilf into
trouble. A certain Prep bus been trying
ever since lust issue to catch us out alone
so us to get satisfaction for a squib at
said youth's expense But wo can out
run him ; so our sloop still visits us.
A certain Fresh ic has groat admiration
for the superiority of the fairer sex.
When tho professor asked him what it is
called when a line of poetry has some
thing extra about it, ho persistently an
swered, "It must lie a female."
Wo would lilto to say that the Universi
ty cudcts did not quell tho riot in Omaha;
but ono of them covered the rioters over
with liis "unanimously" brimmed hut und
literally squelched thorn. All breakers of
the law take warning.
The following appears in the last City
Directory in display type:
"J. O. F McKesson, Publisher of the
Hiisi'intiAN Stuuunt, and Junior at the
University."
It is a groin moral question among the
students how much tlio gentleman paid
for the above notice.
The "Girlulory" girls are becoming ex
tremely affectionate. One of them is even
said to huve shown her love by embrac
ing a gentleman caller the other day.
Henceforth, if wo read Iho signs of tlio
times aright, gentleman callers will bo
more numerous.
N
The i'ullH In tho right
Aru iiuvorin flight,
Not only lour,
Hut twenty unit more;
All, oven tliu vllll.111 D.II.M..
Tlioy would not condemn. 1
One of our seniors had an inspiration
that nearly finished him. After writing
the above ho recovered und is now in ut
tendunce at his classes.
Much amusement was generated in tlio
drill the other day by ono of tlio cadots
suddenly changing tho angle which ho
made with tho surface of tho earth from
90 to 0. Ho gave as the reason of tho
change that lie was unskilled in wearing
hoops. Here is an interesting problem
for the Calculus class: to prove that a clr
cular hoop plus ono boy plus 00 is equal
to 0.
Our stalwart Sophomore lias drooped
his feathers. When ho rang the bell at
the Dormitory the other night, it was tho
matron who ciimo to tho door. "What do
you want, bubbio?" said she, witli a pat.
ionizing air. A stuttering explanation
that ho bud como for ''one of tho young
ladies" made known to the matron her
mistake, and as sho wended hor way to
tho young lady's boudoir she imurmercd
to herself:
"TU oaks from little acornn grow;
Largo words fnm little SophleH flow!"
