16
THE HESPERIAN
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NOT TO BE FEAD.
EXCHANGE.
A THAGKDY.
UI notice cropo on the Smith residence
now. What's the matter?"
"Bill Smith tried to pronounce a little
French yesterday."
SO THEY OUGHT.
"What ip your reason for thinking that
beginners in drawing ought to sympathize
with history students?"
"Both devote most of their time to outlines."
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PRESENCE OF MIND.
'George," said the maiden dreamily, as
for the seventh successive Friday evening
they ascended tho steps of University Hall,
"George, towards which of the society halls
shall wo direct our steps this evening?"
"Amethyst," replied the backward youth,
seizing the opportunity, "wo are but Fresh
men, but but, may I hope thatwith your
permission tho direction of our steps may
be towards Union ? "
very sad.
"This, ladies," saf.d tho asylum guide, "is
our worst case."
Tho visitors turned their eyes on tho in
sane man, as ho thrashed abont his cell,
listening a few moments to his demoniacal
ravings, then asked in one voice, "What
could have brought the poor man to this
dreadful pass?"
"It is very sad," responded the guide,
wiping away a tear, "ho was present at a
meeting of the Botanical Seminar. "
OUGHT TO MAKE A niT.
Student I wish to strike out for raysolf,
professor. To what study would you adviso
me to devote most attention?
Prof. To boxing.
"I say, boy, stop that pig!" "I havo'nt
any stopper." "Well, head him, then."
"He's already headed, sir!" "Confound
your impudence, turn him!" "He's right
side out already:" "Speak to him, then,
you rascal you!" "Good morning, Mr.
Pig." Ex.
Tho ninety-four Universities of Europe
have 41,S41 more students than tho three
hundred and sixty of tho United States.
Ex.
There is an Omaha youth, so wo under
stood; in the High School so bashful that he
blushes to tell the naked truth and ergo
covers it.
"Young man," said the professor, as he
stopped into tho hall and caught a frisky
frcshy by the shoulder, "I believe Satan
has got a hold of you." "T believe so too,"
was the quick reply. Ex.
According to Bayard Taylor, philology is
one of tho easiest of studies for instance,
Rostewwit, res, a thing, and taunts, a bull,
therefore, a bully thing. Ex.
Rosewood coffin,
Vain regrets,
Happens often
Cigarettes. Ex.
Some of our exchanges, are devoted too
largely to literary work. Now this is al
right in its place but its place is not in a
local college paper. The material in such a
paper is supposed to bo road, but it will not
bo road if it makes our eyes sore, as much of
the literary work does. Who cares to read
a lot of rubbish in a college paper, when wo
can find it on every hand. In tho average
college course to-day there is abundant op
portunity for literary work without cramming
it into a paper which should be essentially
local.
Special Saie of Books at HARLEY'S.