V -X. 16 THE HESPERIAN NOT TO BE REflD. bill's presumption. Bill. Say, givo mo a lift on this trig., Our only request to the reader is not to can't you? mistake this column for "sand-burrs." DREADFUL TO THINK OF. If haste makes waste, just comprehend What bushels those create, Who rise at 7:40 and tend Their morning class at eight. The surest way to make one refuse to rec ognize you is to lend him your umbrella. ONE MIGHT KNOW IT. Jim Sun weed. What's the principal dish at your boarding club? Jacky NapeB. Tongue. Three Bopho mores dine there. Silence may bo golden, but in the recita tion room it seems brazen. HER REASON. Sophy Moore. What makes Miss X always wear a demi-train? They went out of style long ago. June Yoore. She wears number nine shoes. I've seen 'em. When Milton wrote his celebrated simile about Yallombrosa and the autumnal leaves, he was not thinking about the faculty and the chapel rostrum.. "All sorts and all conditions of men," murmured the professor gleefully as ho ran over his examination list. Jack. Shut up for goodness' sake. How am I to finish this essay on "Always Lond a Helping Hand," if you don't padlock your jaw? TO BE FEARED. Prof. Bessoy's board is very gay, Bnt yet if all wore worn that way . One fears that neckties never viewed Would tumble into desuetude. HE WAS A NEW STUDENT. Freshio, (looking up from his history les son). I wonder if a tyrant can ever bo truly happy? Soph. Easy enough to find out. Freshio. How ? Soph. Go and ask the night watchman. VERY SAD. Wantsum Mooro. Isn't that strange about Bill Smith's eyes? They used to bo blue, and last week they changed to a deep chestnut. Lots Mooro. Poor follow. Ho read the ' ' Sand-burr' ' column in the JV- n. ANOTHER TRAGEDY. They found him lying there quite dead, And cold; he'd slipped and cracked his Cerebrum, as he wildly fled To got away before, 'tis said, The glee club started practice. y, A M ( m V &?k 1 ij f it. .fcii ki-i! . - ki -i.T V j- i-' i- a- i WHWJaBggCTPWW8WWga w V v5S i'lWWjTKiitrifww ffl