I
THE HESPERIAN
fashion's attempt to revive the swelling device.
Its revival in less ambitious circles was forever put
out of the question by the experience of the
young woman who appeared in the streets of
London a few days ago with the first full Hedged
crinoline that had been seen there. This daring
person waddled from the embankment through
Piccadilly, Regent and Bond street, and other
West Knd thoroughfares, all the time pursued by
a mob of gamins. In fright she took refuge in
an omnibus where the conductor promptly
charged her two fares for the extra space occu
pied, thereby settling the crinoline question for
good in ftngland.
TO A PONY.
Dear faithful steed, how can 1 show
My love for thee.
Or tell in rhyme how much 1 owe
Thy constancy ?
Thou art no thoroughbred, to race
At lightning speed,
Hut yet 1 find thy modest pace
Supplies my need.
1 know not how to sing thy fame,
But this 1 know,
Thou'rt "out of sight" and 'tis my aim
To keep thee so.
High School Student,
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Some folks say "Don't love but one at a time,"
but right here I object, because 1 have noticed
that those who love more than one at a time
seem to have better health and to be more jovial
and pleasant. No person ever killed himself in
tentionally who loved more than one girl at a
time. A fellow is always in hopes if he doesn't
confine himself to loving just one. College boys
are generally considered a tough and deceptive
set because they are usually generous and not so
terribly exclusive in their nature. The fact is-,
a college boy that doesn't love more than one
girl at once is no college boy at all. Southern
University Monthly.
ONUS I'OK A I, l
To parody or not to parody 1 Ay 1
That's the question I Whether, to-day, 'twere
nobler
To let poor Hamlet, in his grave, still suffer
The puny slings and arrows of outrageous
Punsters and parodists with gall unlimited,
Who twist and turn his mild interrogations,
Until the ghost of that once grand solitoquy,
In one faint grin, is lost past recognition,
Or, by some effort of our own, stupendous
And incomparable, end them. To parody,
Or not; ay ! there's the rub ! For when we've
shuffled
Off the few ideas that Hamlet left to us
And cease to advertise our patent medicines,
Our college jokes, and gibes about the weather,
In his much ventilated phraseology,
We greatly fear a sad, inane vacuity
That of us all makes cowards ! And we'd rather
Our rash quietus make in this last spasm,
Than own ourselves ouselves by Shakespeare.
Quiitus Minimus.
The secretary of Harvard University has is
sued a pamphlet apparently designed to correct
the widespread notion that the cost of an acade
mic course at the famous Cambridge school places
it beyond the reach of all young men not blessed
with family wealth. According to this interest
ing brochure, it is possible for a student to get
along comfortably at Harvard with the expendi
ture ofa sum "appreciably smaller than $450 for
the academic year." The ordering of one's
economic affairs that renders this practicable in
volves, however, a dietary regimen made of "tea
or coffee at three cents a cup, milk at two cents a
glass, bread at the rate of two slices for one cent,
and baked beans at four cents a plate." At Me
morial hall the commons of nearly eleven hun
dred students a very fair quality of board js fur
nished for $3.98 per week. One who knows
says that a four year's course at Memorial hall
will breed a dyspepsia that two generations of
careful living will not eradicate; but the pleasure
of sitting three times a day beneath the vaulted
ceiling of the most majestic dining room in the
world is ample compensation for the evil. Cony
Student.
Now is the time. Have your girl promise to
send you a cake at encampment.
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