The Hesperian / (Lincoln, Neb.) 1885-1899, April 15, 1891, Image 16

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A Twice Told Tale !
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The Wise Man.
THE -wise man selccteth the "Burlington Route" and
therefore starteth aright.
HE arraycth himself in purpolc and fine linen, for lo, and
behold! lie is snugly ensconed in a "lower center" on the.
famous vestibuled flyer where smoke and dust arc never
HE provided himself with a book from the generous library
near at hand, adjustcth his traveling cap, and proccedctli
to pass a day of unalloyed pleasure and contentment.
ANI it came to pass being hungry and athirst, he stcp
peth into tnc tuning car, ana oy inc ocara oi me
prophet, 'twas a feast fit for the gods. Venison, blue
' points, Burgundy, frogs' legs, canvas backs, Mums' ex
tra dry, English plum pudding, fruits, nuts, ices, French
coffee verily the wise man waxcth fat, and while he
lighteth a cigar he takcth time to declare that the meal
was "out of sight."
IT exurreth to the wise man that the country throng which
he journeyed was one of wondrous beauty, insomuch
that it was with deep regret he noted the nightly shad
ows fall. However, tenfold joy returned as he beheld
the brilliantly lighted car, and the merry company it
contained Verily, it afforded a view of Elysium.
Til E wise man retircth to rest. Deliriously unconcerned,
he siccus the sleep of the righteous and awakes much
refreshed. His train is on time, his journey ended. He
as he holds a return
rcircalieil. Ills u.iiii in imi milk, ins j.
rejoice th with exceeding great joy ai
by the same route, the "Great Burling
The Foolish Mam
THE foolish man buycth a -ticket of a scalper. In the
morning, behold, he saveth 50 cents, and lo,, at night
time he is out $9.27. He starteth wiong.
WITH might and main he hurricth to the depot, only to
find his train four hours late. The peanut noy -sizeth
him up and sclleth him a paper ol an uncertain date.
AS he journeyeth along he formoth a new acquaintance for
whom he casheth a check.
FIVE minutes for refreshments. -While he rushetli to the
lunch counter some one stcaleth his grip sack. He
changcth his cars lo these many times and it striketh the
foolish man that he "doesn't get through very fast," and
he hemoaneth his ill luck.
I HE gctteth a cinder in his eye and verily he sweareth and
j. cusselh full free. He exchangeth three pieces of silver
' for a bunk in a sleeper and awaketh just in time to catch
an infernal nigger sneaking off with his boots; the por
ter's excuse availcth nothing, and the fooli&h man
straightway puttelh his boots under his pillow that ho
man may break in and steal.
! HIM train runneth into a washout, a hackman takelh him
1 in to the tunc of nix shillings and the foolish man lifteth
up his voice in great lamentation for, lo and behold, the
i tavern is away but half a block.
HE reachcth home weary and heartsore; his trunk cometh
the next day minus the cover and one handle. He re
solvcth hereafter to travel only by the Great Burlington.
Moral: Travel by the Burlington Route.
General' Passenger., and Ticket Agent,
City Passenger-- and Ticket
SiudentS and Their Friends should see to it that their tables arc stcpplied with
The Celebrated
-Everything from this establishment is first-class and we advise all of our friends to go there for their sup
plies. 912 P STREET. TELEPHONE 198.
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